COME-AND 
N'D  -  ME 

ELI  ZAB  ETH  -ROBINS 


Come  and  Find  Me 


Hildegarde 


Copyright,  1907,  1908,  by 
THE  CENTURY  Co. 


'  '  Published,  Fibrrary, 


THE  DE  VINNE  PRESS 


TO  FLORENCE  BELL 


LIST  OF  ILLUSTEATIONS 


Hildegarde Frontispiece 

FACING  PAGE 

Mar's  eyes  looked  over  the  little  boy's  head  into  space  "    .     .     36 
It  was  the  teacher  of  arithmetic  to  the  life,  only  it  was  Bella 


56 

"  The  two  girls  sat  in  front  of  the  confident  young  face  look 
ing  out  of  the  silver  locket " 100 

'  'Brethren,'  he  said,  <  the  angel  of  the  Lord  has  been  with 

me.     He  has  shown  me  great  riches '".     ......  186 

"'I  know  you  '11  do  your  best  for  me,'  Hildegarde  said, 

anxiously " 232 

Hildegarde's  mother  and  Mr.  Blumpitty .  278 

"  Nearer,  my  God,  to  Thee  " 412 

"Coolies  crawled  up  the  ladder  with  vast  burdens  "     ....  426 

'  '  I  suppose  you  think  I  have  something  very  valuable 

here?'" 474 

"Hildegarde's  ankle  turned  more  than  once,  and  now  she 

was  almost  down"  KIQ 


vii 

M30801 


CHINSEGUT,  HERNANDO  COUNTY,  FLORIDA 

Jan.  20,  1906 
MY  DEAR  F.  B. : 

I  believe  it  to  be  commonly  the  practice  of  authors  to  write 
the  dedication  last.  But  I,  being  summoned  by  the  laconic 
imperative  of  the  Atlantic  cable  to  exchange  London  for 
Florida,  and  being  thereby  arrested  midway  in  what  I  have 
always  thought  of  as  your  book,  must  needs  recover  some  of 
the  old  impulse  that  you  gave  me  to  begin  it,  before  I  can 
go  on. 

I  invoke  you  as  I  would  a  breath  of  your  invigorating 
Yorkshire,  for  I  am  captive  in  a  land  of  idleness— myself 
idlest  of  all  the  easy,  time-squandering  folk  that  are  making 
believe  to  finish  my  house  here  upon  the  sunburnt  hilltop. 

This  lodge  in  the  wilderness,  uplifted  like  an  island  above 
encompassing  seas  of  green; this  windswept,  sun-steeped  place, 
ought,  perhaps  (in  spite  of  latitude  and  longitude),  to  give 
me  back  without  your  aid  the  picture  and  the  feeling  of  the 
North.  For  the  first  word  I  set  at  the  top  of  my  page,  though 
Indian,  would  not  have  been  understanded  of  my  ancient 
neighbors  here.  Not  the  Seminoles,  the  Alaskans  gave  us 
our  name.  I  and  another  for  whom  it  means  home,  pro 
nounced  it  first  to  the  rhythm  of  breakers  beating  on  that  wild 
Bering  coast— in  the  midst  of  the  pandemonium  of  the  "far 
thest  North"  gold  boom,  we  dreamed  and  planned  the  picture 
I  look  out  upon  this  morning.  It  might  not  seem  beautiful 
to  you,  yet,  in  spite  of  your  wise  warning,  there  have  gone 
into  my  effort  to  make  the  dream  come  true  the  most  precious 


things  I  had.  Into  this  Chinsegut,  as  you  know,  went,  amongst 
the  rest,  a  great  faith. 

So  that,  however  reminiscent  of  people  or  conditions  long 
since  passed  away,  however  much  of  the  spirit  of  the  past  is 
garnered  here  as  living  influence,  or  as  debris  and  as  ashes, 
these  were  for  me  infinitesimal  affairs  by  comparison  with  the 
hope  for  the  Future  that  made  me  turn  deaf  ears  to  your 
admonishing.  For  this  was  to  be  a  place  where  my  fellow- 
dreamer  and  I  should  not  only  rest,  but  having  rested,  work 
as  never  before.  Our  best  and  biggest  room  was  to  be  called 
the  Workroom. 

But  some  strange  spell  has  hitherto  hung  over  that  apart 
ment  and  all  the  house,  since  even  the  white  remodelers  of  the 
slave-built  dwelling  have  found  it  easier  to  play  than  work 
here. 

As  if  foreseeing  that  the  added  wing,  new  stable,  and  the 
rest,  would  take  more  months  a-building  than  they  would  need 
weeks  in  other  climes,  our  "workmen,"  uneasy  perhaps  under 
the  misnomer,  organized  themselves  into  a  Musical  Society. 
They  would  lay  a  brick  or  rap  in  a  nail,  and  then,  casting 
aside  trowel  or  hammer,  would  catch  up  fiddle  and  bow,  horn, 
or  clarinet,  trying  (since  walls  had  been  known  to  fall  at 
trumpet  blast)  whether  these  could  be  induced  to  rise  to 
strains  of  "Dixie."  One  of  the  band  to  whom  I  owe  my  not 
very  sound  roof,  was  at  least  a  person  of  imagination,  as  I 
will  make  your  ladyship  admit,  if  the  distractions  here  will 
give  me  leave  to  try.  These  are  not  solely  the  growling  of 
saws,  the  scraping  of  planes  and  of  fiddles.  I  find  myself 
forever  running  to  and  fro  like  a  child  in  some  enchanted 
playground,  wooed  by  fifty  things  at  once— but  not  one  of 
them  has  aught  to  do  with  books  or  with  any  aspect  of  the  art 
of  letters. 

My  distractions  have  to  do  with  such  toys  as  the  joy  of 
re-discovering  old  friends  in  all  three  kingdoms,  from  the  for 
gotten  beauty  of  palms  standing  sentinel-like  in  sand  as  white 
as  meal,  to  the  blue  heron  that  goes  sailing  by  to  the  lake  at 
our  feet.  Or  I  am  called  early  to  see  the  delicate  print  of  a 


deer's  foot  that  passed  our  very  gate;  or  I  must  watch  the 
sun  caught  at  setting  in  the  great  ilex,  and  see  the  light  spill 
ing  into  the  Spanish  moss,  soaking  into  the  long  draperies, 
till  they  seem  to  hold  refulgence  in  solution.  Or  I  must  go  and 
plan  the  hedge  of  roses  round  an  old  burying-ground  on  the 
place,  or  listen  half  a  morning  to  a  mocking-bird,  or  steal 
down  in  the  dusk  to  my  beloved  copse  and  play  eavesdropper 
to  the  sullen  owl  who  pretends  he  does  n't  haunt  the  magnolia 
above  the  spring.  Or  I  must  leave  my  coveted  place  of  shade 
on  the  north  veranda  and  come  to  watch  our  friend,  Mr.  Tar- 
rypin,  creeping  heavily  by  in  the  hot  sun  on  his  way  (I  grieve 
to  tell  you)  to  the  soup  tureen.  ("Lawd,  yes.  Tarrypin? 
He  jes  de  same  es  chick'n,  Miss  'Lizbess— once  he  in  de  pot!") 

Even  my  interviews  with  the  cook,  elsewhere  so  summarily 
despatched,  are  here  a  thief  of  time.  For  our  Peter,  who 
learned  his  craft  of  the  Cubans  during  the  late  war,  is  the 
most  beguiling  of  conversationalists.  In  beautiful  sky-blue, 
brass-buttoned  clothes  showing  under  a  spotless  apron,  he 
stands,  interlarding  his  promise  to  "do  it  Spanish  style,"  with 
legends  learned  of  his  mother  who  was  born  in  the  negro 
quarters  here  in  those  more  sumptuous  days  when  our  hill 
was  crowned  with  the  finest  orange  grove  in  all  Hernando. 
Peter  will  tell  you,  chuckling,  that  our  great  twelve  by  twelve- 
inch  cypress  beams  that  turn  the  edge  of  the  white  carpenters' 
tools,  were  hand-hewn  by  his  grandfather,  and  by  that  gallant 
woodman  "tied  and  pinned"  to  frame  the  house  before  the 
"orange"  days— when  all  cleared  land  was  cotton  field. 

But  more  than  by  any  other  creature  the  spirit  of  idleness 
has  been  fostered  by  my  four-footed  friend,  the  particular  joy 
of  my  life  here,  Dixie.  For  I  must  tell  you  that  one's  love  of 
woods  is  only  whetted  by  looking  out,  as  I  am  told  we  do,  upon 
two  hundred  and  fifty  thousand  acres  of  virgin  forest— the 
old  Seminole  hunting-grounds— which  swallow  up  the  white 
man's  puny  clearings  so  effectually  that  even  a  Zeiss  glass  can 
scarcely  pick  them  out.  Dixie  and  I  may  travel  for  hours, 
through  tangles  of  jessamine-laced  live-oak  and  palmetto, 
down  to  dim  lakes  where  the  cypresses  stand  in  water  to  their 

xi 


"knees"  (with  all  the  moss  curtains  close-drawn  against  the 
sun),  and  never  see  a  soul.  Then,  when  even  in  the  open  ways 
of  the  pine  woods  we  find  the  warm  day  quenched  in  mist, 
I  let  the  rein  fall  slack  and  trust  to  that  skill  of  Dixie's,  never 
baffled  yet,  to  take  me  home  the  shortest  way,  in  spite  of.  night 
or  storm  or  the  fierce  dazzle  of  tropic  lightning. 

If  we  are  late,  we  know  "Uncle"  Fielding  will  be  looking 
out  for  us.  Even  if  I  fail  to  distinguish  his  kind,  dark  face, 
I  see  the  whites  of  his  eyes  shining,  I  hear  his  rich  voice 
lowered  to  reproach  that  I  should  be  abroad  so  late  in  the  vast 
Annuttalagga  woods  that  go  to  the  verge  of  the  world. 

But  Uncle  Fielding  has  his  share  in  my  idleness,  for  he 
knows  the  stories  I  like  best  of  all.  When  I  >ve  gone  to  sit 
within  the  radiance  of  the  great  open  fireplace  (less  for 
warmth  than  for  sake  of  cedar  scent  and  love  of  the  flaring, 
singing  resin  in  the  pine),  Uncle  Fielding  will  come  staggering 
in  under  the  weight  of  a  single  log,  and  having  thrown  it 
down,  will  tarry  awhile.  To  my  polite  hope  that  he  feels  at 
home  in  his  new  cottage,  he  replies  with  gentle  assurance :  "I  '11 
haf  to  be  mighty  ole  and  mighty  painful  befoh  I  leave  this 
hilltop."  With  humility  I  learn  to  see  myself  as  the  transient 
one,  the  visitor,  and  Uncle  Fielding  as  the  one  who  rightly  is 
"at  home."  Even  for  neighborly  credit  and  fair  regard  I  look 
to  him.  For  when  one  of  the  younger  generation,  or  some  mere 
new-comer  ventures:  "They  say,  in  the  old  days,  you  knew 
her  brother,"  "Knew  him?"  says  Uncle  Fielding  loftily,  "I 
raised  him— ''  and  so  re-establishes  our  respectability  in  a 
land  that  for  so  many  years  has  known  us  only  as  little-re 
membered  names. 

Can  you  not  see  that  with  the  vivid  intervention  of  all  this 
new-old  life— the  story  you  bade  me  write  has  in  a  brief  space 
gone  to  a  distance  so  illimitable  that  beside  such  a  standard 
of  remoteness,  Florida  is  neighbor  to  the  Pole?  I  tell  you 
plainly  that  if  this  book  of  yours  is  ever  to  be  finished,  you 
must  send  me  something  of  that  influence  that  has  so  often 
spurred  me  on  before.  Once  even  here,  a  touch  of  it,  like 
your  hand  on  my  shoulder,  reached  me  one  evening,  in  spite 

xii 


of  all  the  hosts  of  Hernando.  Walking  about  at  sunset  to 
count  how  many  mangoes  were  growing  near  the  house— I 
was  pursued  as  far  as  the  great  ilex  at  the  gates  by  faint 
intermittent  strains  of  some  unearthly  music.  I  looked  up, 
thinking  of  those  "harps"  that  Hilda  heard  and  to  whose 
strains  she  unsealed  the  Master  Builder's  ears.  Again  that 
music!  faint  but  unmistakable;  sad  and  wild,  with  its  vaguely 
inciting  call.  A  little  shamefaced  for  my  fancy,  I  said  to 
one  who  knew  not  Hilda:  "I  could  almost  swear  I  heard 
harps  in  the  air."  "Yes,"  was  the  answer,  "on  the  roof,"  as 
though  it  were  the  most  natural  thing  on  earth  that  a  carpen 
ter,  instead  of  making  us  rain-proof,  should  devise  and  lash 
in  place  a  wind-harp  over  our  beads!  I  thought  how  you 
would  have  disapproved  that  man— and  cherished  him. 

Although  the  winds  that  come  sweeping  over  the  Mexican 
Gulf  have  cast  the  great  lyre  down  from  my  housetop  — 
nevertheless,  now  that  I  've  invoked  you,  I  seem  to  hear  the 
air  again— even  feel  on  my  shoulder  that  touch  of  your  hand 
with  which  you  sent  me  forth  to  try  if,  in  the  midst  of  the 
London  din,  we  might  not  make  folk  pause  an  instant,  and 
say  with  upturned  faces :  "Harps  in  the  air !"  You  and  I  have 
heard  them  for  many  a  year,  my  friend.  I  think  I  never  was 
with  you  long,  but  I  caught  some  note  of  that  far  music.  Even 
with  the  thick  of  the  world  between  us,  I  listen  for  you  to  call 
the  tune  that  "sends  me  on." 

E.  E. 


xiii 


COME  AND  FIND  ME 


COME  AND  FIND  ME 


CHAPTER  I 

CRISIS  in  the  financial  world  of  California 
kept  the  men  who  were  employed  in  the 
P almas  Valley  Bank  of  Valdivia  hard  at 
work  for  several  hours  after  statutory  clos 
ing  time. 

Nathaniel  Mar  never  came  home  in  these  days  without 
bringing  a  black  leather  bag  full  of  papers,  to  work  over 
in  the  dining-room. 

He  had  his  big  desk  in  there  because  Mrs.  Mar  thought 
it  out  of  place  in  the  parlor,  though  the  parlor  was  the 
quietest  room  in  the  house  and  the  least  used,  whereas  the 
dining-room  was  the  most  frequented  quarter  of  the 
modest  establishment,  and  the  very  place  where  both  the 
big  desk,  and  the  big  man  who  sat  before  it,  were  most  in 
the  way. 

For  here  the  family  not  only  ate  their  meals,  but  here, 
in  Mrs.  Mar's  rocking-chair,  the  screams  of  the  infant 
daughter  were  drowned  in  milk  or  overcome  by  sleep; 
here  the  two  small  boys  were  taught  letters  and  manners ; 
here,  on  their  mother's  work-table,  was  reared  the  ever- 


4  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

renewed  mountain  of '  *  mending, ' '  and  these  the  walls  that 
oftener  than  any  others  looked  down  upon  the  mistress's 
struggles  with  the  "single-handed  help"— a  succession 
of  Irish  or  Scandinavian  girls  who  came,  saw,  conquered 
some  of  the  china,  and  departed. 

This  concentration  of  family  life  in  the  dining-room 
was  not  peculiar  to  the  Mars.  Valdivia-all  California, 
indeed  all  the  towns  of  all  the  northern  and  western 
states,  were  full  of  houses  where  the  shut-up  parlors  bore 
dumb  witness  to  a  social  habit  that  was  become  mere 
tradition. 

The  forebears  of  these  people,  especially  those  German, 
French,  or  Spanish,  had  need  of  a  room  where  they  might 
receive  their  friends  and  talk  to  them  at  their  ease.  But 
in  their  descendants  this  much  chastened  need  had  taken 
on  the  air  of  an  indulgence,  and  was  shrinking  out  of 

sight. 

It  is  true  that  even  the  less  well-to-do,  summoning  all 
their  strength,  sometimes  gave  ' '  parties, "  but  few  houses 
encouraged  the  cheerful  custom  of  having  friends  "drop 
in. ' '  And  so,  no  more  useless  room  in  any  dwelling  than 
the  parlor.  Yet  so  great  was  the  power  of  this  tradition 
of  a  lost  hospitality,  that  people  who  had  almost  nothing 
else  over  and  above  the  grimmest  necessities,  still  had 
their  parlor.  Discomfort  and  cramping  of  every  kind 
was  stoically  borne  that  the  sacred  precincts  might  be 
preserved  inviolate.  For  what?  Nobody  ever  asked. 

So  then,  in  the  dining-room,  sat  Nathaniel  Mar  even  on 
this  fine  Sunday  afternoon,  when,  as  a  rule,  the  desk  was 
shut  and  the  owner  gone  to  potter  in  the  garden.  But  the 
exigency  was  great,  and  for  once  even  the  Seventh  Day 
had  brought  no  rest.  As  he  sat  there,  bent  over  the  desk, 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  5 

the  light  fell  with  such  harshness  on  the  man's  fore 
shortened  features,  under  the  unkempt  mop  of  pre 
maturely  graying  hair,  that  you  would  not  easily  have 
believed  him  to  be  under  forty  odd. 

He  was  not  yet  thirty-five-.  The  deep  line  that  dropped 
from  the  side  of  each  nostril,  to  lose  itself  in  the  heavy, 
dark  mustache,  gave  to  his  face  a  stricken  and  weariful 
air.  And  he  sat  crooked,  with  one  high  shoulder  more 
hunched  than  the  other.  You  saw  the  reason  of  that 
when  he  got  up  to  shut  out  the  sounds  of  pan-banging, 
and  fire-irons  rattling,  that  came  in  through  the  inch  of 
open  door  opposite  the  one  leading  into  the  hall.  Before 
rising,  Mar  had  felt  for  his  walking-stick,  and  any  one 
who  noticed  how  heavily  he  bore  upon  it  in  limping  over 
the  worn  carpet,  knew  why  it  was  that  one  of  his  great 
shoulders  was  pushed  awry. 

He  made  the  same  detour  in  returning  to  his  seat  as 
had  carried  him  to  the  kitchen  door,  carefully  cruising 
round  the  pitfall  presented  by  a  half -yard  or  so  of  extra 
dilapidation  in  the  yellow-brown  carpet.  As  you  looked 
closer  at  what  his  avoidance  made  more  noticeable,  you 
saw  that  a  less  faded  piece  had  been  tacked  over  a  part 
hopelessly  worn  and  mended,  and  how  even  this  newer 
square  had  despairingly  let  go  of  the  tacks  that  held  it, 
and  been  kicked  up  by  some  foot  less  considerate  or  more 
courageous  than  Mr.  Mar's.  The  superimposed  piece  sat 
now,  in  a  frayed,  rag-baggy  condition,  gaping  with 
despair,  and  like  some  beggar  in  extremis  by  the  way, 
ready  to  lay  hold  on  the  first  unwary  foot  that  passed. 

The  entire  room  wore  that  indescribable  air  of  settled 
melancholy  that  no  one  thing  in  it,  not  even  the  carpet, 
seemed  quite  ugly  or  uncomfortable  enough  to  account 


6  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

for.  The  furniture  was  heavy  and  old.  Upon  the  walls, 
besides  two  or  three  reconnaissance  maps,  were  some  in 
offensive  prints.  A  '"Signing  of  the  Declaration  of  In 
dependence"  hung  high  between  the  two  windows,  and 
underneath,  in  oval,  gilt  frames,  were  companion  pic 
tures  of  Mar's  mother  and  of  his  father,  who  had  been 
for  many  years  minister  to  Valdivia's  first  Presbyterian 
Church. 

On  the  opposite  wall  a  good  engraving  of  Lincoln  was 
flanked,  somewhat  incongruously,  by  a  photograph  of  a 
buxom  young  woman  with  a  group  of  girls  behind  her — 
Mar's  wife  in  her  school-teaching  days,  with  her  class. 
Besides  these,  an  old  view  of  the  Lake  of  Geneva,  a  print 
of  Cromwell,  and  on  the  wall  behind  Mar's  revolving 
chair,  an  engraved  portrait,  bearing  underneath  it  the 
inscription:  John  W.  Galbraith,  President  Rock  Hill 
Mining  Co. 

Even  if  these  adornments  were  of  a  very  mild  descrip 
tion,  they,  at  least,  covered  several  feet  of  the  marbled 
yellow  paper  that  apparently  had  been  chosen  (and 
chosen  a  good  while  ago)  to  "go  with"  the  hideous 
"grained"  woodwork.  That  it  did  "go  with"  that  pe 
culiarly  perverse  soiling  and  smearing  of  inoffensive  sur 
faces,  may  not  be  denied.  It  went  far.  It  arrived  at 
such  a  degree  of  success  that  all  the  little  room  irradiated 
a  bilious  yellowness  "clawed"  with  muddy  brown. 

The  very  atmosphere  was  not  left  as  nature  sent  it  in 
at  the  window.  It  halted  upon  the  sill  and  changed 
color,  like  one  who  gets  wind  of  ill  news.  The  moment  it 
penetrated  beyond  the  holland  blinds  it  turned  sick  and 
overflowed  the  room  in  dirty  saffron. 

It  may  well  be  wondered  why  any  creature  who  was 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  7 

not  obliged  to  should  come  here.  And  yet  the  defeated- 
looking  man  at  the  window  did  not  lack  high  companion 
ship.  Sunset  and  the  rain,  the  call  of  the  winds,  clouds 
of  majesty,  and  mists  of  silver,  not  these  alone.  Day 
dreams  penetrated  the  sullen  walls.  Here,  where  the 
rudest  emigrant  would  not  long  abide,  fair  visions  made 
themselves  at  home— "exultations,  agonies"— a  field  here 
for  the  unconquerable  mind  no  more  unfit  than  many  an 
other  for  the  long  battle  men  call  life. 

On  this  particular  July  afternoon,  Nathaniel  Mar  had 
no  sooner  shut  out  one  order  of  disturbance,  than  an 
other  penetrated  the  room  from  a  different  direction. 

"Sigma!"  a  loud,  clear  voice  was  calling  from  the 
region  of  the  stairs.  "Sigma,"  and  again,  "Sigma! 
Have  you  set  the  table  ?  Sigma-a-a ! ' ' 

Nathaniel  Mar  wrote  on. 

The  door  opened  suddenly  and  in  came  a  brisk,  rather 
handsome,  dark-eyed  woman,  with  an  infant  on  her  arm. 
Singularly  enough  the  child  seemed  to  be  as  little  inter 
rupted  in  its  occupation  of  sleeping  as  the  father  in  his 
writing.  There  were  certain  sounds  that  both  were  in 
ured  to.  Among  others,  Mrs.  Mar  calling  "Sigma,"  or 
"Kate,"  or  "Jane."  But  when  she  stopped  short  near 
the  threshold  and  asked : 

"Where  is  that  girl?"  Mar,  without  raising  his  eyes 
from  his  paper,  made  a  little  motion  toward  the  door  he 
had  just  shut. 

"I  should  think,"  he  said,  quietly,  "she  was  probably 
breaking  up  the  kitchen  stove. ' ' 

Before  he  finished,  Mrs.  Mar  had  opened  the  other 
door,  and  again  called  ' '  Sigma ! ' ' 

"Yes  _yes."    In  rushed  a  little  white-headed  Swede, 


8  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

fourteen  to  fifteen  years  of  age,  her  sleeves  tucked  up, 
her  coarse  gown  tucked  up,  her  fair  skin  showing  vividly 
a  sooty  mark  across  her  forehead,  which  she  had  smudged 
down  her  nose  and  finely  shaded  off  into  the  red  of  her 
cheek. 

When  Sigma  was  calm  and  collected  she  walked  the 
floor  as  if  it  were  knee-deep  in  sand.  When  she  was 
agitated  she  did  not  walk  at  all.  She  plunged.  Sigma 
was  agitated  now. 

"Coom!"  she  said,  lifting  a  bare  elbow  toward  the 
kitchen  as  another  person  might  point  with  a  finger. 
"Coom!"  and  turning  heavily  she  was  about  to  plunge 
back  into  her  special  domain. 

But  Mrs.  Mar  arrested  her.  "Why  have  n't  you  set 
the  table  ?  Look  at  the  time. ' '  She  pointed. 

Sigma  paused  and  thought.  Following  the  index 
finger  she  recognized  the  clock,  looked  inquiringly  from 
it  to  the  lady,  and  then  suddenly  felt  she  understood,  a 
thing  of  almost  exciting  infrequency.  She  scuffled  good- 
naturedly  across  the  room,  picked  up  the  heavy  time 
piece  and  was  in  the  act  of  handing  it  to  Mrs.  Mar. 

' '  Let  the  clock  alone !  Put  it  down,  I  say.  What  will 
she  do  next?  The  table.  Table!"  She  beat  upon  it 
briskly  with  her  one  free  hand.  "Supper." 

"Oh,  soopra!"  says  the  girl,  setting  down  the  clock 
and  lurching  hurriedly  toward  the  kitchen. 

"Stop!  Don't  you  understand  you  have  to  set  the 
table  earlier  to-day?  Before— you— go— out.  Your  even 
ing.  Understand?  Your  friend  calls  for  you  at  six." 
She  indicated  the  hour  on  the  clock  face.  "Takes  you— 
heaven  knows  where.  She  does  n't  forget  if  you  do. 
Tour— evening— out."  As  Sigma  only  stood  and  stared 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  9 

dully,  Mrs.  Mar  dropped  into  the  rocking-chair  with, 
' '  I  foresee  this  girl  will  drive  me  demented. ' ' 

Sigma  embraced  the  opportunity  to  shuffle  toward  the 
door  again. 

' '  Where  you  off  to  now  ?  You  can 't  go  till  you  Ve  set 
the  table.  Here!"  Still  with  the  well-inured  infant 
sleeping  on  her  arm,  Mrs.  Mar,  remarking  in  a  conversa 
tional  tone  that  she  was  "certain  she  should  go  mad," 
pulled  open  the  sideboard  drawer  and  took  out  the  table 
cloth.  "Put  this  on.  Straight,  for  a  change.  Then  the 
mats." 

The  mistress 's  eye  falling  suddenly  upon  that  deplorable 
place  in  the  carpet,  she  was  forcibly  reminded  of  the 
little  copper-toed  boots  that  had  wrought  the  havoc. 

' '  What  are  they  at  now  ? ' '  she  said,  half  to  herself,  as 
she  crossed  the  room,  and,  craning  her  chin  over  the  sleep 
ing  child  at  her  breast,  she  guided  the  toe  of  her  shoe 
under  the  tacked  bit,  stroking  down  the  darned  tatters 
underneath,  before  she  straightened  and  trod  flat  the 
outer  layer.  Each  time  thereafter  that  she  crossed  the 
troubled  area  her  foot,  half -impatient,  half -caressing,  en 
couraged  the  patch  to  lie  still.  "What  keeps  those  chil 
dren  so  quiet  ?  Where  are  they  ? ' ' 

Sigma,  hearing  the  anxious  rise  in  her  mistress 's  voice, 
dropped  the  corner  of  the  cloth  she  was  twitching  and 
rushed  for  the  mats. 

"No,  no,  finish.  Here.  Straight.  Like  this."  A  mo 
ment's  silence,  and  then  again,  "Where  are  those  chil 
dren?" 

Sigma  hurriedly  offered  her  the  cruet. 

"Idiot.  I  am  asking  you  about  the  children.  The— 
chil— dren.  Where— are— they  ?  Don 't  you  know  ?  Lit- 


10  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

tie  boys.  Trenn,  and  Harry,  and  Jack  Galbraith— where 
gone  ? ' ' 

"Oh,  Yack!  He—  Sigma,  with  great  action  of 
hip  and  elbow,  splurged  over  to  the  window,  and  mo 
tioned  away  across  an  empty  lot. 

"What,  again?  Here,"  Mrs.  Mar  wheeled  upon  her 
husband,  "you  must  hold  the  baby  a  moment.  If  I  lay 
her  down  she  '11  wake  up  and  scream. ' ' 

As  Mrs.  Mar  hastened  out  through  the  kitchen  you 
could  hear  that  she  paused  an  instant  to  exclaim  aghast 
at  something  she  found  there. 

Mr.  Mar  had  accepted  the  charge  with  a  curious  tran 
quillity,  making  the  infant  comfortable  in  the  hollow  of 
his  left  arm.  Then  he  went  on  with  his  writing. 

Sigma  returned  to  the  intricate  task  of  setting  the 
table.  She  did  it  all  with  an  excited  gravity,  as  if  she 
were  engaged  in  some  spirited  game,  putting  down  plates, 
knives,  and  forks  with  an  air  of  one  playing  trumps,  and 
yet  not  quite  sure  if  it  was  the  right  moment  for  them. 
When  she  had  placed  the  straw  mats  with  mathematical 
precision,  she  drew  off  proudly,  to  get  the  full  splendor 
of  effect.  When  it  came  to  dealing  with  the  sugar  bowl, 
she  glanced  at  Mar's  bent  head,  and  helped  herself  to  a 
lump,  became  furiously  industrious  upon  the  strength  of 
that  solatium,  and  plunged  after  spoons  and  cups.  When 
ever  she  made  a  clatter  she  stopped  sucking  and  glanced 
nervously  toward  Mar,  as  if  she  expected  him  to  rise  and 
overwhelm  her. 

He,  with  unlifted  head,  wrote  steadily  on. 

The  child  slept. 

Sigma  put  -a  worn  horsehair  chair  at  head  and  foot 
of  the  table,  two  high  chairs  on  one  side  for  the  little 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  11 

boys,  and  an  ordinary  one  on  the  other;  as  she  did  this 
last  her  eye  fell  on  the  four  cups.  She  paused  uncertain, 
till  she  had  noiselessly  counted  five  on  her  stumpy  fin 
gers.  Then,  ''Oh,  Yack  maa  ha'  en !"  she  reminded  her 
self,  lurched  away  into  the  kitchen  and  reappeared  wip 
ing  a  cup  on  a  dish  towel,  one  end  of  which  she  had 
tucked  in  her  apron  string.  As  she  was  about  to  deposit 
the  fifth  cup,  she  glanced  at  the  man  bent  over  the  desk, 
and  put  her  disengaged  hand  again  in  the  sugar  bowl. 
Mar  turned  suddenly  in  his  creaking  chair;  Sigma 
started,  and  meaning  to  drop  the  sugar,  dropped  the  cup 
instead.  She  stared  an  instant,  open-mouthed,  as  at  some 
unaccountable  miracle ;  and  then,  with  a  howl,  flung  up 
her  bare  arms  and  fled  round  the  table  on  her  way  to 
the  kitchen,  caught  her  great  foot  in  the  carpet-trap  and 
measured  her  length  on  the  floor. 

' '  Look  here,  you  must  go  into  the  kitchen  to  do  that. ' ' 
Mar  spoke  as  one  not  presuming  to  deny  that  it  might  be 
a  part  of  her  duty  to  precipitate  herself  on  her  stomach 
and  howl,  but  questioning  only  the  propriety  of  the  spot 
selected.  "I  can't  have  you  doing  it  here,"  he  said. 

Sigma  was  still  "doing  it,"  so  far  as  howling  went, 
but  she  was  also  scrambling  up,  with  her  elbow  held  over 
her  head,  as  if  she  counted  on  a  thumping.  From  under 
her  bare  forearm  her  streaming  eyes  looked  out  at  Mar. 
Whether  the  man 's  quiet  face  in  the  midst  of  the  uproar 
astonished,  calmed  her— she  gaped,  letting  the  rude  la 
mentation  die  in  her  throat. 

"Men— Meesis  Marr—rr!"  she  said  under  her  breath, 
picking  up  the  cup. 

Mrs.  Mar's  husband  held  out  his  hand  for  it.  "It  's 
only  the  handle,"  he  said,  and  set  the  cup  down  on  the 


12  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

writing-table,  that  he  might  change  the  position  of  the 
fretting  child.  For  his  long-suffering  daughter  was  at 
last  roused  to  protest. 

The  little  maid-servant  wiped  her  eyes,  and,  with  the 
air  of  one  who  is  willing  to  let  bygones  be  bygones,  shuf 
fled  a  step  nearer  to  the  desk. 

"Me— Gif  Sigma,"  she  said,  and  held  out  her  red 
arms. 

Mar  looked  up,  understood,  and  handed  over  the  baby. 
It  was  curious  to  see  the  practised  sureness  with  which 
this  female  barbarian— who  caught  her  big  feet  in  the 
carpet  and  dropped  the  china— with  what  skill  she  han 
dled  that  fragile  and  intricate  mechanism,  an  infant. 
Mar  watched  her  as  she  stood  there,  swaying  her  own 
thick  body  back  and  forth  like  a  human  rocking-chair, 
holding  the  child  in  sure  comfort,  patting  it  softly,  and 
crooning  to  it  uncouth  words  in  a  foreign  tongue.  Miss 
Mar  understood  perfectly,  and  responded  by  laying  her 
small  pink  face  against  the  scullion's  untidy  gown  and 
falling  back  into  slumber. 

The  opening  of  the  front  door,  and  voices  in  the  hall- 
above  all  one  voice  ordaining  that  certain  persons  should 
go  up-stairs  and  wait  for  her!— made  Sigma  pause,  lis 
ten,  and  then,  still  holding  close  the  pacified  infant,  she 
beat  a  stealthy  retreat,  shutting  the  kitchen  door  behind 
her  with  a  softness  incredible. 

Mrs.  Mar,  upon  her  reappearance,  was  seen  to  be  usher 
ing  in  by  the  shoulder  an  anxious  little  boy  of  eight  or 
nine.  As  with  some  force  she  conveyed  him  across  the 
room,  his  foot  caught  in  the  same  place  where  Sigma  had 
met  defeat.  But  Sigma  had  not  been  sustained  by  Mrs. 
Mar's  hand.  The  lady  merely  unhooked  the  boy  with  an 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  13 

extra  shake.     Then,  with  her  free  hand,  she  pulled  his 
chair  out  from  the  table,  and  thrust  him  into  it. 

"Now,  you  're  to  sit  right  there,  and  then  I  '11  know 
that  at  least  till  supper-time  you  won't  be  getting  my 
children  into  any  more  mischief. ' ' 

Mar  had  looked  up  upon  their  entrance,  seemed  about 
to  speak,  and  then  dropped  a  discreet  head  over  his  work. 

"Where  's  the  baby?"  demanded  his  wife. 

"Sigma—" 

"This  precious  protege  of  yours,"  interrupted  the 
lady,  again  straightening  the  carpet  with  the  toe  of  her 
shoe;  "this  precious  protege  of  yours  has  pulled  up  a 
plank  out  of  the  sidewalk,  dragged  it  across  the  field 
down  to  the  duck-pond,  and  there  I  found  him,  using  it 
as  a  raft. ' ' 

"I  had  n't  used  it— not  yet."  A  world  of  lost  oppor 
tunity  was  heavily  recalled. 

"Oh,  no,  you  were  n't  using  it." 

But  the  irony  was  lost. 

"Vere  was  n't  woom  for  all  of  us,  so  I  let  Twenn  and 
Hawwy  go  ve  first  voyage.  I  'm  vewwy  kind  to  little 
boys. ' ' 

' '  Oh,  indeed !  So  kind  you  preferred  to  risk  other  chil 
dren 's  lives  while  you  looked  on." 

"Looked  on?  Oh,  no,  ma'am,  did  n't  you  see  I  was 
workin'  like  anyfing?"  He  glanced  across  at  his  ally. 
"It  was  a  steamship,  Mr.  Mar.  I  was  ve  injine.  I  'm  a 
most  glowious  injine— 

' '  Yes,  if  you  please, ' '  Mrs.  Mar  broke  in.  "He  's  been 
propelling  the  plank  all  round  the  pond  with  those  two 
poor  little  innocents  on  it— the  greatest  wonder  they 
were  n  't  drowned. ' 


14  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"It  was  very  wrong,"  said  Mr.  Mar,  gravely— then, 
under  his  breath  to  his  wife,  "but  the  water  is  n't  much 
over  a  foot  at  the  deepest. ' ' 

"Quite  enough  to  drown  any  wretched  baby  that  might 
fall  in—  but,  of  course,  you  defend  that  boy  no  matter 
what  he—  " 

"Not  at  all— not  at  all.  I  don't  approve  in  the  least 
of  his-" 

"And  our  two  little  boys  mud  and  dirt  from  their 
heads  to  their  heels,  looking  like  a  couple  of  chimney 
sweeps— 

"No,  ma'am,"  said  the  young  gentleman  from  the 
horsehair  chair,  in  a  conciliatory  tone.  "Twenn  and 
Hawwy  ain't  black,  only  just  bwown." 

"Brown,  indeed!  I  '11  brown  you,  sir,  if  you  ever  do 
such  a  thing  again  while  you  're  staying  here!  Harry 
with  his  stocking  quite  torn  off  one  leg!  And  Trennor's 
only  decent  breeches—" 

"Vere  was  a  nail  in  vat  board,"  Jack  explained,  con 
versationally,  putting  a  finger  through  a  jag  in  his  own 
trouser  knee. 

"Small  matter  to  you,  if  you  do  ruin  your  things." 
(Jack  began  to  swing  his  muddy  feet— it  was  gloriously 
true.)  "But  you  've  got  to  remember  that  other  chil 
dren's  clothes  don't  grow  on  gooseberry  bushes." 

"My  pants  did  n't  neever,"  returned  Jack,  sturdily. 

"Keep  your  feet  still  and  your  tongue,  too." 

"Yes  'm." 

Mrs.  Mar  was  in  the  act  of  turning  away,  after  a  fur 
ther  slight  attention  to  the  carpet  patch,  when  her  eye 
fell  upon  the  handleless  cup  on  the  desk. 

' '  Did  you  do  that  ? "  she  demanded. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  15 

Mar  cleared  his  throat,  and  Mrs.  Mar  for  once,  not 
waiting  to  hear  the  horrid  details,  sat  down  in  her  rock 
ing-chair,  despair  in  her  face  and  the  broken  cup  in  her 
hand. 

"I  never  saw  anything  like  it.  The  grate  in  the  kit 
chen  range  has  just  collapsed,  too. ' ' 

"Really?    That  'sbad-" 

"It  's  worse  than  bad — it  's  awful." 

1 1  We  must  let  the  stove  people  know— 

1 '  How  are  you  going  to  do  that  on  Sunday  ? ' ' 

"Oh— ah — well,  it  matters  less  I  suppose  on  Sunday 
than  if  it  happened  on  a  week-day. ' ' 

' '  It  won 't  matter  in  the  least,  of  course,  to  have  no  hot 
water  to  wash  the  clothes  in,  Monday  morning.  Perhaps 
you  'II  think  it  matters  more  when  it  comes  to  eating  cold 
things  for  I  don 't  know  how  long. ' ' 

"I  think  you  '11  find  I  shall  be  able  to  put  up  with—" 

"Yes,  it*'s  perfectly  true,  I  always  find  you  readier  to 
put  up  with  disaster  than  to  struggle  against  it." 

"How  would  you  propose  I  should  struggle  against  a 
broken  stove?" 

She  turned  her  flushed  face  from  him. 

"Did  n't  I  tell  you  not  to  kick  the  table?"  she  de 
manded  of  Jack. 

"Oh!  Yes  'm.  I  forgot."  He  curled  up  the  dis 
graced  foot  underneath  him,  for  a  reminder  that  it  was 
to  keep  still. 

"The  furniture,"  Mrs.  Mar  went  on,  looking  round 
the  room,  "is  quite  dilapidated  enough  without  your 
making  it  worse." 

"Yes,  ma'am." 

"Well,  I  suppose  I  must  go  and  attend  to  those  chil- 


16  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

dren,  and  the  supper.  But  don't  let  him  kick  the  furni 
ture,  Nathaniel,  even  if  he  is  the  son  of  your  adored 
Galbraith.  The  owner  of  all  that  Rock  Hill  Mining 
property  did  n  't  trouble  himself  much  about  you. ' ' 

"Yes,  he  did.  He  was  a  very  good  friend,"  and  Mar 
made  a  slight  movement  as  of  one  clearing  a  space  in  the 
air  before  setting  to  work  again. 

His  wife,  in  her  progress  to  the  door,  halted  me 
chanically  in  the  middle  of  the  patch,  as  though  the 
momentary  weight  of  her  presence  there  would  leave  be 
hind  a  subjugating  effect.  But  she  murmured  absently : 
"I  must  have  another  hunt  for—  Then,  turning  with 
sudden  animation:  "Is  it  you  who  Ve  taken  away  my 
tack-hammer  ? ' '  she  demanded  of  Jack. 

"No,  ma'am." 

1 '  Well,  understand, ' '  she  went  on,  precisely  as  though  he 
had  admitted  his  responsibility  for  the  disappearance  of 
the  tool,  "understand  you  're  to  sit  there  till  supper,  and 
this  is  the  last  of  your  play  ing  about  that  dirty  duck-pond. " 

' '  I  forgot  it  was  Sunday, ' '  he  said,  penitent. 

"Sunday  or  any  other  day — never  again." 

Jack  gasped  with  incredulity,  and  then,  slowly,  "You 
don 't  weally  mean  we  're  never  to  go  to  ve  pond  for  ever 
and  ever ! ' ' 

' '  Well,  just  you  try  it !  And  you  '11  find  yourself  going 
back  to  school  to  spend  your  holidays  with  the  janitor. ' ' 

In  the  pause  that  followed  this  awful  threat  Jack  mur 
mured:  "Never  go  a-sploring  any  more!"  and  then  sat 
as  one  paralyzed  by  an  awful  and  unexpected  blow. 

Mrs.  Mar  replaced  the  handleless  cup  upon  the  table, 
and  took  up  the  corner  of  the  cloth  to  determine  the  ex 
tent  of  a  damage  wrought  in  the  last  washing. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  17 

' '  Everything  we  possess  seems  to  be  giving  out  at  once 
—like  the  different  parts  of  the  One  Hoss  Shay.  It  's 
exactly"— she  turned  her  bright,  dark  eyes  toward  the 
writing-table,  and  spoke  with  a  sudden  access  of  vigor — 
"exactly  as  if  there  was  a  law  that  allowed  you  for 
months  and  years  to  patch  and  tinker,  to  bolster  up  your 
rickety  furniture,  to  darn  your  old  carpets,  to  reseat  your 
old  chairs,  to  make  over  the  clothes,  to  solder  the  sauce 
pans,  and  keep  things  going  generally,  up  to  a  given  mo 
ment.  But  when  that  moment  comes" — she  lifted  her 
finger  Sibyl-like  in  the  air— "every  blessed  belonging  be 
gins  to  crack,  or  fray,  or  creak  with  the  pangs  of  ap 
proaching  dissolution.  Are  you  listening  to  what  I  say, 
Nathaniel?  There  is  n't  a  thing  in  this  house  that 
does  n  't  need  to  be  renewed. ' '  She  spoke  with  a  direct 
ness  that  seemed  pointedly  to  include  her  husband  among 
the  dilapidations.  He,  half-absent,  half-speculative, 
looked  round  upon  objects  familiar  to  him  from  childhood. 

' '  Who  'd  ever  think, ' '  pursued  his  wife,  ' '  who  'd  ever 
think  that  we  'd  been  married  less  than  eight  years? 
But  this  is  what  comes  of  not  furnishing  new  when  you 
first  set  up  housekeeping.  If  you  don't  get  nice  things 
when  you  marry  you  never  get  them. ' ' 

"Some  people,"  said  Mar,  "seem  to  like  old  furni 
ture." 

* '  Let  them  have  it,  then  ! ' '  Her  quick  gesture  pre 
sented  the  entire  contents  of  the  house  to  the  first  bidder. 
"I  say  for  young  people  to  begin  life  with  the  battered 
belongings  of  their  fathers  and  mothers  is  a  mistake. ' ' 

"Well,  my  dear,"  returned  her  husband,  with  some 
dignity,  "it  's  a  mistake  you  had  no  share  in.  But, ' '  he 
added  hastily,  ' '  we  had  no  choice. ' ' 

2 


18  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"No,"   she   said   bitterly,    "we    Ve   had   very   little 
choice. ' ' 

* '  We  did  once, ' '  said  Nathaniel  Mar. 

In  the  pause  she  looked  down  at  the  patch  on  the  car 
pet. 

* '  And  we  ignored  it, ' '  he  finished. 

'  *  Oh,  if  you  are  going  back  upon  that  old  foolishness. 
She  turned  abruptly  and  set  down  the  broken  cup. 

"You  did  n't  think  it  so  foolish  when  I  first  told  you 
about  it. ' ' 

"Oh,  did  n't  I!" 

' '  No.    It  made  just  all  the  difference  then. ' ' 

"What   difference,   I    'd   like   to   know,   did   it   ever 
make?" 

"It  made  you  say  'Yes'  after  you  'd  said  'No.'  : 

"The  more  fool  I,"  she  said,  and  left  the  room. 


CHAPTER  II 

>HE  big  man  and  the  little  man  sat  and  looked 
at  the  patch  on  the  carpet,  till  for  one  of 
them  the  ragged  place  disappeared. 

A  big  tear  splashed  on  the  grimy  little 
hand. 

But  out  of  the  mist,  a  voice:  "Can't  you  think  of  any 
safer  sort  of  games  ? ' ' 

The  balked  navigator  sniffed  audibly,  and  with  the 
back  of  his  hand  he  made  a  dirty  smear  across  his  wet 
face.  "We  don't  any  of  us  seem  to  care  much  about 
vem,  if  vey  are  too  safe." 

"H'm,"  and  with  a  faint  smile  Mar  resumed  his 
writing. 

Jack  Galbraith  sat  quite  still,  for  him,  with  the  dis 
graced  foot  tucked  under  him.  But  Mar,  without  rais 
ing  his  eyes,  was  conscious  as  a  woman  might  have  been, 
of  the  frequent  journey  of  the  small  hand  across  the 
eyes,  and  now  and  then  the  more  efficacious  aid  of  a 
sleeve  employed  to  clear  the  watery  vision. 

Presently,  "After  I  'most  dwownded  ve  childwen,  I 
expect  she  would  n't  let  me  wead  my  twavel  book.  "What 
do  you  fink,  Mr.  Mar  ? ' ' 

The  gentleman  addressed  laid  down  his  pen,  but  still 
looking  at  it,  "Well,  I  don't  know,"  he  said  cautiously. 

Whereupon  Jack  Galbraith  gave  way  openly  to  tears. 


20  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"You  're  not  going  to  forget/'  said  the  man,  with  no 
great  show  of  sympathy,  "you  're  not  going  to  forget 
that  however  much  a  boy's  father  leaves  him,  America 
lias  n  't  got  any  use  for  an  idle  man. 

"It  's  Mrs.  Mar  makes  me  sit  here  doin'  nuffin',"  the 
child  indignantly  defended  himself. 

' '  Oh,  for  the  moment,  yes.  But  when  the  time  comes 
to  choose  what  you  're  going  to  do,  Jack— if  I  'm  not  at 
hand  to  talk  it  over,  think  about  civil  engineering.  It 
takes  a  man  about,  and  on  more  intelligent  terms  than 
my  profession— 

"Yes,"  Jack  threw  in  upon  the  ground  swell  of  a 
heavy  sob.  "I  should  n't  like  sittin'  countin'  money  in 
a  bank,"  and  while  he  caught  his  breath  he  looked  about 
drearily,  as  if  already  he  saw  himself  an  imprisoned 
cashier. 

"Sitting  in  a  bank  is  n't  the  profession  I  chose,  either. 
I  am— I  was  a  surveyor,"  said  Nathaniel  Mar. 

«Oh_h?"  inquired  the  child,  in  his  surprise  forget 
ting  to  continue  the  celebration  of  his  private  misfor 
tunes.  "Did  you  use  to  go  all  over  everywhere  wiv  a 
Spy_glass  and  a  chain?" 

"Yes,  the  members  of  the  Scientific  Corps  are  ex 
pected  to  go  'all  over  everywhere.'  : 

* '  Clear  wound  ve  world  ? ' ' 

"Well,  we  did  n't  go  round— we  went  the  other  way, 
the  way  that  takes  you  to  the  top. " 

"Did  you  get  clear  to  ve  vewwy  top  of  ve  world?" 

"Nobody  's  ever  been  clear  to  the  top." 

"Why  has  n't  anybody?" 

"Tough  job!" 

"Was  it  tough  job  to  go  where  you  went?" 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  21 

"It  was  n't  easy.  Some  of  our  work  lay  quite  near 
enough  to  the  arctic  circle. ' ' 

"But  I  expect  you  liked  it  a  lot  better  van—"  He 
paused,  looked  about,  and  felt  gloom  return  upon  him. 
If  Mar  was  thinking  so  was  Jack  Galbraith.  Again  he 
dragged  his  rough  sleeve  across  his  hot,  little  face. 
"Ain't  it  perferly  awful  sittin'  still?"  he  observed. 

"Yes,  it  's  pretty  awful,"  agreed  Mr.  Mar,  glancing 
out  of  the  window. 

"Was  it  up  vere  you  found  ve  parlor  bearskin  and 
Mrs.  Mar's  white  fox?" 

"Yes,  it  was  up  there." 

' '  You  're  sure  if  I  'ma  engineer  or  a  surveyor  I  'II  be 
able  to  go  up  vere  where  you  found— 

' '  Certain  to  be  able  to  go  somewhere. ' ' 

"Why  can't  I  go  where  you  did?"  he  asked,  querul 
ously.  As  Mr.  Mar  did  not  answer  at  once,  "Is  n 't  vere 
any  little  fing  left  to  be  done  up  vere  ? ' ' 

"Oh,  lots!  But  you  see  I  went  there  in  '65 — going  on 
ten  years  ago,  when  people  thought  they  'd  like  to  have 
a  telegraph  line  between  Asia  and  America.  So  some  of 
us  went  to  survey  the  Alaskan  part  of  the  route  (only  it 
was  n't  called  Alaska  then)  and  decide  the  best  course 
for  the  line  that  was  to  meet  the  one  coming  across  from 
Siberia."  Again  Nathaniel  Mar  studied  the  end  of  his 
pen. 

"Yes,"  said  Jack,  blowing  his  nose  with  an  air  of 
faintly  reviving  faith  in  life's  possibilities.  "Yes,  and 
vere  you  met  ve  bear,  and  Mrs.  Mar's  white—" 

"We  got  some  furs  and  truck,  but  we  did  n't  get  the 
telegraph  line. ' ' 

"Why  did  n't  you?" 


22  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

' '  Well,  you  see,  only  a  few  years  ago  people  laughed  at 
the  idea  of  an  Atlantic  cable.  But  while  we  were  hard 
at  work  up  yonder  surveying  and  clearing  and  setting 
up  telegraph  poles,  did  n't  some  other  fellows  prove  the 
possibility  of  an  Atlantic  cable  by  just  going  and  laying 
it !  So  we  were  recalled. ' ' 

' '  But  you  had  got  pwetty  far,  anyhow. ' ' 

1  'Yes,  we  got  pretty  far." 

"You  got  to  where  ve  foxes  turn  white  and  ve 
bears-" 

"Yes,"  said  Mar,  reflectively,  and  then  there  was  a 
pause. 

Jack  looked  at  him.  "Could  n't  you  tell  me  about 
when  you  got  vat  bear,  or"— in  the  tone  of  one  grateful 
for  small  favors— "or  how  you  found  Mrs.  Mar's 
white—" 

"I  don't  seem  to  remember  anything  specially  inter 
esting  about  the  bears  or  the  foxes."  His  far-off  look 
gave  the  little  boy  a  sudden  feeling  of  being  abandoned 
by  his  one  friend.  He  stood  it  for  a  moment,  and  then 
suddenly  twisted  his  lithe  body  round  and  buried  his 
face  in  the  crook  of  the  arm  that  clutched  the  chair  back. 
Mar  raised  his  eyes  and  seemed  to  come  home  from  some 
vast  journey. 

"Something  curious  did  happen  to  a  man  I  knew  up 
there,"  he  said,  in  that  friendly  tone  Jack  knew  so  well. 
' '  A  fellow  who  was  knocking  round  the  Russian  Redoubt 
at  St.  Michaels,  with  the  rest  of  the  Scientific  Corps, 
waiting  for  the  revenue  cutter  that  was  to  take  us  back 
to  San  Francisco.  We  got  pretty  tired  waiting— 

"Pwickers  in  your  feet?"  Jack  interrupted,  suddenly. 
Mar  stopped  short,  for  although  Jack  had  uncovered  his 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  23 

face  to  listen  he  was  engaged  in  making  the  most  sur 
prising  grimaces.  "I  Ve  got  awful  pwickers  myself," 
he  said. 

"Prickers!" 

"Yes.  Oh,  oh,  my  foot  's  full  of  champagne."  Gin 
gerly,  and  with  further  contortions  of  countenance,  he 
stretched  the  cramped  foot  out. 

"Champagne?"  Mar  had  echoed.  "What  do  you 
know  about  champagne  ? ' ' 

' '  Once— papa 's  birf  day.    Oh,  oh,  my  foot  's  full  of  it ! " 

"If  it  's  gone  to  sleep  you  'd  better  stamp,"  recom 
mended  his  friend  gravely,  and  Jack  applied  the  remedy 
with  apparent  relief  after  the  first  awful  shock.  He 
stood  cautiously  twisting  about  to  restore  circulation 
while  Mar  went  on:  "Yes,  we  got  pretty  tired  hanging 
round  St.  Michaels,  and  one  day  two  of  the  party  took  a 
boat  and  went  off  to  an  island  to  get  birds '  eggs.  While 
they  were  out  a  storm  came  up.  An  awful  storm,"  he 
assured  his  inattentive  listener,  but  Jack  was  still  gloom 
ily  twirling  about,  trying  his  numb  foot,  and  not  taking 
any  stock  apparently  in  a  story  that  did  n  't  boast  a  bear 
in  it,  or  even  a  white — 

"I  never  in  my  life  saw  anything  like  it,"  Mar  went 
on.  "The  gale  churned  up  the  sediment  of  Norton 
Sound  into  a  boiling,  yellow  froth.  The  sleet  gave  up 
trying  to  come  down,  and  took  to  shooting  horizontally, 
as  straight  as  a  charge  of  musketry,  and  wherever  it  hit 
bare  flesh—  "  He  shook  his  shaggy  head  at  the  memory. 

"I  would  n't  mind  a  little  fing  like  vat!"  said  Jack, 
loftily. 

"Well,"  Mar  accepted  the  implied  criticism  with 
meekness,— "what  they  minded  most  was  that  they 


24  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

could  n  't  steer  a  course.  It  was  going  to  be  great  luck  if 
the  boat  lived  at  all  in  such  a  sea.  She  was  driven  north 
first.  Neither  one  of  the  men  knew  just  where  it  was 
they  'd  got  to,  but  any  kind  of  land  was  a  pretty  good 
sight.  They  were  almost  as  glad  to  get  near  it  as  they 
were  to  get  away  from  it. ' ' 

"Why  did  n't  vey  like  it?"  Jack  did  n't  so  much  as 
pause  in  his  twirling  to  inquire. 

' '  Well,  it  was  n 't  a  very  pretty  place  for  landing  pur 
poses.  ' ' 

' '  Ho ! ' '  said  the  young  gentleman  with  careless  superi 
ority,  *  *  I  don 't  mind  where  /  land !  One  time  I  landed 
wight  on  top  of  a  earf quake ! ' ' 

"Ah!"  said  Mar,  gravely,  "that  was  pretty  daring; 
but  you  may  depend  it  was  n't  in  as  bad  a  place  as  the 
one  I  'm  talking  about.  Horrible  steep  cliffs  sheer  down 
to  the  shore.  Boulders  piled  helter-skelter.  Could  n't 
see  much  through  the  dimness  of  the  sleet  and  the  dazzle 
of  the  spray,  still,  they  saw  enough  to  know  it  was  n 't  the 
harbor  they  were  hoping  for.  But  to  get  the  boat  out 
of  that  boiling  surf  alive— no,  it  was  n't  easy." 

Mar  caught  the  first  look  of  keenness  that  crossed  the 
tear-stained  face— the  sudden  taut  aspect  of  the  slim 
little  body,  and  he  knew  perfectly  well  that  the  modest 
young  navigator  before  him  was  saying  in  his  heart,  ' '  Ah, 
now,  if  /  'd  been  there."  Thus  encouraged,  Mar  went 
on:  "Things  had  been  bad  enough  out  in  the  open  sea, 
but  here  you  were  being  driven  straight  on  the  rocks,  and 
the  wind — you  don't  know  anything  yet  about  what  the 
wind  can  do  when  it  tries. ' ' 

"What  kind  offing?" 

"It  cut  the  top  off  those  great  waves  as  clean  as  you 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  25 

can  slice  the  peak  off  a  hillock  of  ice-cream;  and  the 
water  was  hurled  at  you,  not  in  spray,  but  in  masses, 
you  know— masses  that  never  broke  till  they  struck  the 
men  or  the  boat— except  when  the  wind  veered,  and  then 
the  water  masses  were  flung  clean  up  on  the  cliffs,  as 
neatly  as  you  could  throw  a  bottle  of  soda  on  our  roof 
here  and  never  see  a  drop  spilled  till  the  glass  burst  on 
the  slates. ' ' 

Jack  nodded  and  seemed  to  forget  his  twirling,  though 
he  stood  with  his  body  slightly  askew,  ready  to  begin 
again. 

"They  'd  never  have  got  out  of  that  boiling  caldron 
alive  if  the  wind  had  n't  changed."  Mar  wagged  his 
head  in  a  final  sort  of  way,  and  turned  in  his  revolving 
chair  to  pick  up  a  fallen  paper. 

"Is  vat  all?    And  vey  did  get  home—" 

* '  No,  that  's  not  all,  and  they  did  n  't  get  home.  Only 
one  of  them  got  anywhere."  Mar  bent  his  big  body 
slightly  forward  and  clasped  his  hands  round  the  good 
knee.  The  other  leg  was  stretched  straight  out  in  front' 
of  him,  stiff  and  lifeless  looking. 

"They  kept  afloat  for  several  hours,"  he  went  on, 
"only  to  be  wrecked  after  all,  a  mile  or  two  beyond  an 
ugly  looking  cape  called  Nome. ' ' 

1 '  Wecked !    Were  vey  weally  wecked  ? ' ' 

Mar  nodded.  In  an  emergency  so  great  Jack  did  not 
scruple  to  turn  his  back  on  the  stool  of  penitence.  He 
came  and  planted  himself  on  wide  apart  legs,  directly  in 
front  of  Mr.  Mar,  and  stood  there  waiting.  But  Mr.  Mar 
seemed  to  be  thinking  less  about  Jack  now,  and  he  stared 
steadily  at  the  hole  in  the  carpet. 

"What  happened  to  ve  little  boat?" 


26  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

1  'The  little  boat  was  rapidly  converted  into  little 
flinders." 

' '  Ven  how  could  ve  men  get  away  again  ? ' ' 

' '  That  's  what  one  of  the  men  would  have  liked  some 
body  to  tell  him. " 

' '  Were  n  't  vere  any  people  vere  on  vat  land  ? ' ' 

"Not  a  soul." 

' '  Where  was  ve  ovver  man  ? ' ' 

"He  had  been  washed  out  of  the  boat— he— it  was 
hard  to  say  where  the  other  man  was. ' ' 

1 '  Did  n 't  his  f  wiend  look  for  him  ? " 

"Not  just  then.  The  first  thing  the  friend  did  was  to 
tear  up  his  shirt. ' ' 

' l  Gwacious !    Was  he  as  mad  as  vat  ? ' ' 

' '  No,  he  was  n 't  mad,  but  he  wanted  some  strips  to  tie 
round  a  wound  he  'd  got. ' ' 

"  Oh !    And  when  he  'd  done  vat  ? ' ' 

"Then  he  went  up  on  the  tundra." 

"What  's  ve—  " 

"The  tundra  is  the  great,  rolling  plain.  They  call  it 
'the  steppes'  in  Siberia.  A  few  inches  below  the  arctic 
moss  that  covers  it,  it  's  frozen,  even  in  summer,  as  hard 
as  iron.  And  it  never  melts.  It  's  been  frozen  like  that 
for  millions  of  years. ' ' 

"Why  did  ve  man  want  to  go  up  on  ve— ve—  ?" 

"Well,  he  seemed  to  think  he  'd  like  to 'go  to  sleep.  So 
that  's  what  he  did.  He  slept  a  long  time.  When  he 
woke  up  he  went  down  to  the  beach,  and  the  first  thing 
he  saw  was  his  friend.  It  looked  as  if  the  friend  had  been 
sleepy,  too.  He  was  taking  his  ease  down  there  on  the 
sand,  in  a  tangle  of  seaweed.  His  face  was  hidden.  The 
other  one  went  down  to  him,  as  fast  as  his  wound  would 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  27 

let  him,  and  he  called  several  times.  Then  he  took  hold  of 
his  friend's  shoulder  and  shook  him.  But  the  friend 
never  stirred— he  was  dead.  Up  there,  above  the  line  of 
seaweed  and  driftwood,  either  he  or  the  surf  had  flung 
his  rifle— the  butt  rather  battered,  but  nothing  a  handy 
man  could  n't  put  right;  only  a  rifle  is  n't  much  good 
without  cartridges.  By  and  by,  the  live  man  dug  a  grave 
for  the  dead  one  up  above  tide  line  in  the  sand ;  and  when 
he  had  buried  the  body,  he  sat  down  and  wondered  how 
long  it  would  be  before  the  end  would  come  for  himself. 
While  he  sat  there  tinkering  at  the  rifle,  a  couple  of  na 
tives  came  down  the  coast. ' ' 

' '  Cannibals  ? "  In  his  excitement  Jack  dropped  on  the 
floor  like  a  small  Turk,  with  his  legs  curled  under  him. 
But  he  had  steadied  his  precipitate  fall  into  that  position 
with  a  hand  on  his  friend's  leg— and,  as  ill-luck  would 
have  it,  not  the  good  leg,  but  the  stiff,  forbidding  mem 
ber  that  poor  Mar  dragged  about  the  world  with  the 
help  of  his  stout  walking-stick.  Now,  to  touch  that  leg 
would  have  been  like  touching  the  leg  of  a  table,  if  "some 
how  it  had  n  't  been  more  like  touching  a  corpse.  Jack 's 
friend  did  n't  seem  to  mind.  But  the  boy  felt  the  con 
tact  the  more  keenly  for  the  fact  that  Mar  felt  it  hardly 
at  all.  That  was  the  horror  of  a  wooden  leg— that  it 
could  n 't  feel.  Jack  snatched  away  his  hand  as  if  it  had 
been  burned.  But  Mar  was  saying  calmly,  *  *  Cannibals  ? 
Oh,  no.  Esquimaux,  quite  good  fellows.  They  must 
have  seen  white  men  and  firearms  before,  for  they  took 
a  deep  interest  in  the  rifle.  The  castaway  made  them 
understand  he  was  hungry.  They  nodded  and  pointed 
back  the  way  they  had  come.  The  white  man  got  up  and 
hobbled  away  with  them. ' ' 


28  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

' '  What  made  him  hobble  ? ' ' 

''Oh— a— it  's  quite  common  after  a  wreck— you  '11 
notice  people  often  hobble  for  a  while.  Well,  they  went 
along  the  beach,  till  they  came  to  a  place  so  rocky  it 
drove  them  up  on  the  edge  of  the  tundra ;  and  up  there 
the  white  man  saw  across  the  plain  to  the  nor'ard,  a  low 
line  of  hills  streaked  with  snow.  And  there  was  one  bare 
peak  in  particular  that  stood  out  very  plain.  It  looked 
only  about  eight  or  nine  miles  away,  and  you  could  see 
quite  well  there  was  something  curious  about  it.  Yes, 
it  was  queer. ' ' 

' '  What  was  ve  matter  wiv  it  ? " 

' '  It  had  a  curious-shaped  top.  Even  from  the  coast  it 
did  n't  look  natural.  You  'd  swear  it  was  a  monument 
of  some  kind.  The  natives  did  n't  seem  to  know 
anything  about  it.  There  was  a  river  flowing  down  from 
the  hills  through  the  tundra  to  the  sea,  and  all  the  mouth 
of  it  was  choked  with  driftwood,  though  there  was  n't  a 
tree  in  sight  and  had  n't  been  all  along.  Beyond  the 
driftwood,  a  long  sand-spit  ran  out  into  the  sea,  and 
spread  itself  right  and  left,  parallel  to  the  coast,  and  on 
this  sand-spit  were  a  lot  of  little  driftwood  huts,  skin 
boats  drawn  up,  and  people  in  fur  standing  round  a  fire. 
The  two  Esquimaux  took  the  white  man  across  in  a  boat, 
and  told  the  other  Esquimaux  about  him.  And  they  gave 
him  some  food,  fish.  Everybody  took  so  much  interest  in 
his  rifle  that  he  had  to  sit  on  it.  They  talked  a  good  deal, 
but  the  white  man  did  n  't  know  what  it  was  all  about.  So 
he  ate  and  slept,  and  ate  and  slept,  always  with  his  rifle 
under  his  arm.  When  he  got  tired  of  eating  and  sleep 
ing,  the  castaway  sat  and  looked  at  the  sea.  Never  a  sail. 
And  sometimes  he  would  turn  and  look  at  that  queer 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  29 

peak  over  beyond  the  tundra.  He  gathered  that  these 
people  did  n't  live  here  on  this  sand-spit— they  were  only 
camping.  Kind  of  Esquimaux  summer  resort.  No,  they 
could  n't  take  him  to  a  white  settlement.  They  knew 
nothing  about  any  white  settlement.  Then  he  would  show 
them,  he  said.  Let  them  bring  down  their  best  boat,  and 
he  would  give  his  gun  to  them  if  they  'd  take  him  off 
there  to  the  southeast,  to  St.  Michaels.  They  shook  their 
heads  and  bustled  away.  The  white  man  saw  with  horror 
signs  of  a  beginning  to  break  camp.  Where  were  they 
all  going  ?  Over  the  hills  ?  No,  on  up  the  coast  by  sea. 
When?"  Mar  pantomimed  their  answer— placed  his 
two  hands  palm  to  palm,  laid  his  head  down  on  them 
sideways  and  shut  his  eyes,  opened  them  briskly,  and 
took  hold  of  his  stick  as  if  about  to  start  on  a  journey. 

Jack  was  grinning  with  delight.  ' '  Was  vat  ve  way  vey 
said  '  to-morrow  morning  ? '  : 

"Just  like  that.  They  were  going  off  the  very  next 
day!" 

"Not  goin'  to  leave  vat  poor  man  all  alone  vere,  were 
vey?" 

' '  No,  they  seemed  quite  ready  to  take  the  castaway  and 
his  rifle  along.  But"— Mr.  Mar  looked  so  grave  that 
Jack  came  closer  still— "to  go  up  yonder  with  them  to 
their  underground  winter  home  seemed  to  the  castaway 
almost  as  horrible  as  to  be  left  behind.  Well,  he  had  a 
day  anyhow  to  think  it  over.  His  wound  was  still  pretty 
painful,  but  he  felt  whatever  happened,  he  ought  to  go 
over  the  tundra  to  that  queer  hill  and  take  a  look  at  the 
situation  from  the  top.  He  must  have  been  feverish,  or 
he  'd  have  realized  that  he  was  n't  fit  yet  for  hard  exer 
cise,  and  that  there  was  n't  a  ghost  of  a  likelihood  of  a 


30  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

settlement  on  the  far  side,  since  these  natives  knew  noth 
ing  about  it.  Then  you  see,  there  was  the  awful  danger 
that  on  this  last  day  a  rescue  party  should  sail  hopelessly 
by  while  he  was  away,  or  a  whaling  schooner  pass,  that  he 
might  have  hailed.  But  no.  He  had  got  it  into  his  head 
that  if  he  could  only  reach  the  top  of  that  glacier-carved 
height,  all  his  troubles  would  be  at  an  end.  But  he  did 
have  the  sense  to  guard  against  the  natives  making  off 
in  his  absence.  He  got  one  of  the  boys  to  come  along 
with  him. 

1 '  How  old  was  vat  boy  ? ' ' 

"Oh— a— about  your  size,  but  four  or  five  years  older, 
and  very  clever  at  throwing  the  bird-dart.  No,  I  '11  tell 
you  about  that  another  time.  They  set  off  across  the 
tundra.  It  was  n  't  easy  walking.  It  was  n  't  walking  at 
all.  It  was  jumping  from  one  moss  knoll  to  another,  or 
wading  to  the  knees  in  the  spongy  hollows.  But  he  'd 
look  up  at  the  peak  and  say : '  Once  I  'm  there—  '  All  the 
same,  he  had  to  call  a  halt  several  times.  He  'd  find  a 
dryish  place,  and  he  'd  sit  down  and  stare  about  him. 
They  had  long  lost  sight  of  the  sand-spit.  Even  the  sea 
had  disappeared.  To  right  and  left,  as  far  as  you  could 
see,  tundra,  tundra,  nothing  but  tundra,  a  few  pools  shin 
ing  in  the  hollows,  and  acres  of  sedge  and  moss,  and  low- 
growing  '  scrub-willow. '  Nothing  else.  Just  this  feature 
less  plain  till  the  land  met  the  ocean  and  the  ocean  met 
the  arctic  ice.  Suddenly,  '  What  's  that  ? '  says  the  white 
man,  and  he  pointed  sou 'west.  The  native  stared.  The 
light  plays  you  queer  tricks  on  the  tundra.  You  often 
see  lakes  and  ships  and  cities  that  are  n't  there.  But  this 
did  n 't  look  like  a  mirage,  it  was  too  simple,  too  distinct. 
Just  two  sticks  stuck  in  the  tundra.  They  might  be  one 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  31 

mile  away,  they  might  be  ten.  But  there  those  sticks 
stood  as  clear  against  the  blue  sky  as  a  couple  of  bean 
poles  on  a  prairie  farm. ' ' 

11  Vey  were  n't  bean  poles !"  said  the  prescient  listener. 

' '  No, ' '  agreed  Mar.  ' '  The  white  man  decided  it  must 
be  some  driftwood  contrivance  of  the  natives.  Only  the 
remarkable  thing  about  it  was,  that  he  had  n  't  noticed  it 
before.  For  a  thing  like  that  is  apt  to  strike  you  in  a 
country  where  there  was  n't  a  tree  for  a  hundred  and 
fifty  miles  to  the  south  'ard,  and  not  one  between  you  and 
the  Pole.  Well,  he  felt  he  'd  know  more  about  those 
sticks,  and  he  'd  know  more  about  a  lot  besides,  when 
he  'd  got  to  the  top  of  the  hill.  So  they  went  on ;  but  the 
hill  was  a  good  way  off.  The  '  little  white  patches '  turned 
out  to  be  vast  fields  of  rotten  snow.  You  went  in  up  to 
your  waist.  The  native  jabbered,  and  seemed  to  be  point 
ing  out  that  it  was  better  to  go  the  long  way  round. 
There  was  less  snow,  and  there  did  n 't  seem  to  be  such  a 
chaos  of  talus— broken  rock,  you  know— tumbled  down 
from  the  peak.  And  the  peak  was  n't  a  peak.  It  was 
more  like  a  queer-shaped,  flat  stone  set  on  a  rock  pedes 
tal.  '  It  's  all  right, '  the  man  kept  saying  to  himself,  as 
they  pushed  on,  '  I  shall  feel  it  was  worth  it,  once  I  'm  on 
the  top. '  And  they  went  on  and  on.  All  of  a  sudden  the 
man  looked  up,  and  realized  that  the  feeling  that  had  been 
haunting  him  was  justified.  The  rock  up  there  was  like 
a  giant  anvil.  So  like,  it  was  almost  uncanny  to  think 
nature  could  have  carved  a  stone  with  such  whimsical  ex 
actness.  'Just  wait  till  I  get  up  there,'  he  said  again, 
half -laughing  to  himself;  'see  if  I  don't  hammer  out 
something!'  and  he  forgot  his  wound  and  how  it  hurt 
him  to  walk,  and  he  jumped  across  a  water  hole  to  a 


32  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

higher  knoll  and  saw  that  the  ground  on  the  other  side 
fell  gently  down  to  a  shallow  valley.  And  the  valley  held 
a  little  stream  in  its  lap.  The  white  man  realized  when 
he  saw  that,  how  thirsty  he  was.  He  had  n't  dared  to 
drink  out  of  the  standing  pools  on  the  tundra,  and  he 
went  as  fast  as  he  could  away  from  the  anvil,  and  down 
the  slope  to  the  running  water.  He  saw  a  dash  of  some 
thing  white  on  the  edge  of  the  bank,  as  he  hurried  down 
to  the  creek,  and  he  knew  in  the  back  of  his  head  that  it 
was  a  little  heap  of  weather-bleached  bones  that  shone  so, 
off  there  in  the  grass.  But  he  never  stopped  till  he  stood 
by  the  bed  of  the  stream.  He  took  up  the  water  in  his 
double  hands  and  drank.  It  was  good  water,  and  he  'd 
never  been  so  thirsty  before  in  his  life.  But  the  water 
spilled  away  through  his  fingers,  and  he  felt  he  should 
never  get  enough.  So  he  balanced  himself  over  some 
stones,  and  he  lay  on  his  stomach,  and  reached  his  lips  to 
the  clear  water.  He  drank  and  drank,  with  his  half -shut 
eyes  fixed  on  a  spark  of  mica,  that  caught  the  light  and 
was  shining  like  a  diamond  under  the  water.  No,  it 
was  n't  mica.  He  saw  plainer  now.  He  leaned  over  a 
little  further,  and  picked  the  bit  of  pyrites  out  of  the 
wet  gravel.  The  Esquimau  boy  saw  the  white  man  stand 
up  as  suddenly  as  if  he  'd  been  stung.  But  he  held  on  to 
the  thing  he  had  taken  into  his  palm,  and  he  lifted  his 
hand,  like  this,  several  times,  and  he  turned  the  thing 
over  and  over,  weighing  it.  One  place  in  the  stained, 
brassy-looking  thing  had  been  scratched,  and  every  time 
the  light  caught  that  new  abrasion,  it  glinted.  The  white 
man  took  out  his  knife  and  cu  tithe  substance.  It  was  gold ! ' ' 
"Weal  gold?"  said  Jack  Galbraith,  gathering  up  his 
sprawled-out  body  with  a  squirrel-like  quickness. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  33 

"Real  gold,"  answered  Mar.  "  'Any  more  stuff  like 
this  about !'  the  white  man  asked.  The  native  looked  at 
the  nugget,  and  shrugged  indifferently.  The  white  man 
dug  about  in  the  gravel  with  his  hands  and  a  sharp  stone, 
and  then  he  sat  down  and  thought,  with  his  eyes  on  the 
place  where  the  nugget  had  been.  The  Esquimau  boy 
got  out  his  bird-dart,  and  went  off  a  little  way  after  a 
jack-snipe.  The  white  man  knew  he  ought  to  make  a 
miner's  assay." 

"What  'svat?" 

"That  's  'panning.'  If  he  'd  had  a  round  pan  like 
Sigma 's  bread  pan,  he  'd  have  put  some  sand  and  gravel 
in  it,  and  he  would  fill  it  to  the  brim  with  water,  and 
he  'd  wash  the  sand  and  gravel  round  and  round,  picking 
out  all  the  stones  and  letting  off  the  water  little  by  little, 
with  a  circular  motion— so.  And  all  the  lighter  sand  and 
stuff  would  get  washed  out;  and  by  and  by,  if  the  miner 
knows  his  business,  any  gold  that  may  have  been  in  that 
sand,  every  particle,  is  left  behind  in  the  bottom  of  the 
pan." 

Gwacious !    Vat  would  be  luck ! ' '  said  Jack,  with  en 
thusiasm. 

'  No,  it  is  n  't  luck.    It  's  skill  and  specific  gravity. ' ' 

"Why  did  n't  ve  man  twy  it?" 

1 '  He  had  n 't  any  pan.  He  had  n 't  even  a  shovel.  I  've 
seen  it  done  very  cleverly  with  a  shovel.  I  Ve  seen  it 
done  with  a  saucer.  He  had  nothing.  How  was  he  going 
to  find  out  if  there  was  any  more  of  that  stuff  there  ?  Had 
this  one  nugget  by  any  chance  been  dropped?  No,  that 
was  absurd.  Who  could  have  dropped  it  ?  But  he  looked 
up  the  bank  where  the  bones  shone,  and  out  of  the  coarse 
grass  a  skull  grinned  at  him.  Not  a  wolf's  skull,  or  a 


34  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

deer's,  as  he  'd  thought.  A  human  being's— a  white 
man 's,  perhaps.  Had  the  nugget  belonged  to  him  ?  Had 
he  brought  it  from  some  valley  far  away,  and  lost  his  bit 
of  gold  as  well  as  his  life  here  under  the  shadow  of  the 
great  stone  anvil?  The  graver  the  man  got  down  there 
by  the  water,  the  broader  the  one  on  the  bank  seemed  to 
grin.  Suddenly  the  living  man  got  up,  and  ran  toward 
that  heap  of  bones  as  if  he  could  n't  rest  till  he  'd  found 
out  what  the  joke  was  the  dead  man  was  laughing  at.  He 
picked  up  the  skull,  and  he  saw  it  was  a  white  man's." 
1 '  How  could  he  see  vat  ? " 

"He  looked  at  the  teeth.  They  were  splendid.  Good 
as  any  savage's— all  but  one— one  was  filled.  When  he 
saw  that,  the  castaway  knew  that  probably  this  white 
man,  who  had  been  here  before  him,  had  dropped  that 
nugget  in  the  creek-or  it  had  been  washed  down  there 
after  the  wolves  had  torn  the  dead  man's  clothes.  But  who 
could  tell!  'Look  here,'  the  live  man  asked,  'what  did 
happen  ? '  But  the  other  would  n  't  say  a  word,  just  went 
on  grinning  in  that  irritating  way  of  his.  So  the  live 
man  picked  up  two  stones,  and  got  out  his  big  clasp- 
knife,  and  he  went  at  that  skull  with  might  and  main, 
sawing  at  it  with  the  knife  (which  was  no  good  at  all), 
and  hammering  with  first  one  stone  and  then  another, 
working  away  like  one  possessed. 

"Did  he  weally  fink  he  could  make  ve  skull  tell  him 
somefing?"  and  Jack  Galbraith  laughed  aloud  at  so  fool 
ish  an  adventurer. 

"Seemed  as  if  he  thought  he  'd  get  some  satisfaction 
out  of  it,  from  the  way  he  kept  on.  By  the  time  the  Es 
quimau  boy  got  back  with  the  jack-snipe,  the  white  man 
had  hammered  away  everything  from  that  skull  except 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  35 

the  round  basin  of  the  cranium— this  part,  you  know. 
The  Esquimau  boy  was  horrified,  and  made  signs  of  dis 
approval. 

'  'Just  you  wait/  said  the  white  man.  He  took  the 
bone  bowl  down  to  the  bank.  He  filled  it  full,  and  three 
times  he  'panned'  the  gravel  of  that  creek.  And  every 
time  he  got  gold!" 

"Gwacious!"  said  Jack,  in  an  excited  whisper. 

"Yes,"  agreed  Mr.  Mar,  "when  he  saw  colors  the  third 
time  he  just  poured  the  stuff  wst  into  his  handkerchief, 
and  told  the  Esquimau  boy  he  was  ready  to  go  now.  As 
he  went  up  the  bank,  he  passed  the  bones  again.  *  I  won 
der  if  he  knew ! '  the  castaway  thought,  and  as  he  went  on 
he  thought  more  and  more,  and  he  got  solemner  and 
solemner.  He  said  to  himself:  'A  gold  mine  will  do  me 
just  about  as  much  good  as  it  did  Old  Bones,  if  I  have  to 
stay  up  here  with  the  Esquimaux.  We  '11  go  back  the 
other  way,'  he  called  to  the  boy,  and  the  boy  did  n't 
think  much  of  the  plan.  But  the  white  man  kept  looking 
all  round  in  every  direction,  to  see  if  there  was  the  least 
little  trail  leading  anywhere,  or  the  smallest  human  sign. 
Only  those  bones  shining  so  white  down  there  on  the  bank ! 
The  castaway  went  on,  feeling  pretty  sick  and  anxious, 
till  he  looked  straight  up  and  saw  off  there  against  the 
blue,  that  great  anvil,  plainer  than  ever.  The  nose  quite 
sharp  and  finely  cut,  the  top  as  flat  as  our  dining-table, 
and  the  waist  gouged  in  exactly  as  a  real  anvil  is.  '  Well, 
I  won 't  give  up  going  to  the  top, '  he  said  out  loud,  '  and 
if  there  are  any  settlements—  It  was  a  crazy  thing  to 
do,  but  he  did  it;  and  when  he  got  to  the  top  he  saw 
something  he  would  n't  have  seen  in  time,  if  he  had  n't 
climbed  Anvil  Rock." 


36  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"What  did  he  see?"  Jack  gathered  together  his 
sprawled-out  body  and  sat  up. 

Mar's  eyes  looked  over  the  little  boy's  head  into  space. 
"No  settlements.  Beyond  the  creek,  barren  hills  to  the 
north.  No  hope  that  way.  East  and  west  the  tundra 
stretched  to  the  horizon  line  level  as  the  ocean.  No  hope 
right  or  left.  He  turned  round  and  saw  off  there  to  the 
south  the  coast  where  he  'd  been  wrecked,  and  the  sand- 
spit  the  Esquimaux  were  making  ready  to  leave,  and  be 
yond  that,  against  the  horizon— what  was  that!  He 
nearly  fell  off  the  rock.  For  a  two-masted  schooner  was 
lying  a  couple  of  miles  off  the  shore.  Two  masts!  It 
flashed  over  him  those  were  the  two  poles  he  'd  seen 
sticking  up  above  the  tundra,  several  hours  before.  Well, 
he  got  down  off  that  rock  double  quick,  and  he  nearly 
killed  himself  tearing  back  to  the  coast,  and  signaling  the 
ship.  He  was  only  just  in  time— they  were  weighing  an 
chor."' 

"Well,"  said  Jack,  with  a  long  breath  of  relief,  "it 
was  a  good  fing  he  climbed  vat  funny  hill ! ' ' 

"Y— yes,"  said  Nathaniel  Mar.  His  tone  was  hardly 
satisfactory. 

"Did  n't  he  get  back  to  his  fwiends  all  wight?" 

"Oh,  yes,  he  got  back  all  right." 

' '  What  did  vey  say  when  he  told  vem  about  ve  gold  ? ' ' 

' '  He  did  n  't  tell  anybody  about  that  just  then. ' ' 

"Why  not?" 

"If  he  had,  somebody  might  have  rushed  there  and 
cleaned  the  whole  creek  out,  before  he  had  a  chance. ' ' 

"  Oh !    How  soon  did  he  go  back  ? ' ' 

"He-he  did  n't  go." 

Jack  sat  there  wide-eyed.    ' '  W— why  did  n 't  he  ?  " 


"Mar's  eyes  looked  over  the  little  boy's  head  into  space  " 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  37 

"Well,  you  see,  he  had  a  pretty  bad  time  with  that  leg 
of  his." 

"Oh,  it  was  his  leg,  was  it?" 

"A— yes— his  leg.  He  kept  waiting  for  the  doctors  to 
cure  it.  Instead  of  curing  it  they  kept  cutting  off  little 
bits  of  it." 

1 '  Ow !    Well— and  after  vat,  when  it  did  get  well. ' ' 

"It  did  n't." 

"And  was  he  lame  always,  like  you?" 

"Something  like  me." 

"Why  did  n't  he  get  a  store  leg,  too?" 

"He  did,  I  believe— ultimately." 

"And  was  n't  it  any  good?" 

"It  was  n't  quite  the  same  as  the  one  he  'd  lost." 

Oh,  no. ' '  Jack  realized  that,  with  a  creep  down  his 
back.  He  could  still  feel  the  dreadful  touch  of  it  on  his 
fingers.  "But  I  suppose  he  sent  somebody  else  up  after 
vat  gold?" 

"N-no." 

" Well,  what  did  he  do?" 

"He— he  got  married." 

"Oh-h.    And  after  vat?" 

1 '  Then  he  got  a  post  of  some  sort— not  easy  to  get,  still 
harder  to  leave. ' ' 

«And-" 

"And  then  he  got  some  children.  Oh,  he  was  always 
getting  things,  that  fellow!  Once  it  was  intermittent 
fever.  Anyhow  he  had  to  stay  where  he  was. ' ' 

' '  Ven  who  got  ve  gold  ? ' ' 

"Nobody.    Not  yet." 

"Ve  gold  is  waitin'  vere  now?"  Jack  jumped  to  his 
feet  with  dancing  eyes. 


38  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"So— a— so  he  says.7' 

"Oh— oh!"  Then  with  an  air  of  fiery  impatience: 
* '  What  you  say  vat  man  's  doin '  now  ? ' ' 

"He— well— I  understand  he  's  hanging  on  to  that 
post." 

* '  Hangin '  on  a  post ! ' '  Jack  colored  as  Mar  laughed, 
and  added  hurriedly,  "Just  wa-itin'  to  see  if  vat  leg 
won 't  get  better,  I  s  'pose. ' ' 

"Waiting  for— several  things. " 

Jack  came  closer.  "Oh,  does  n't  he  mean  to  never 
mind  his  leg,  and  go  back  some  day  ? ' ' 

' '  I  would  n  't  be  surprised  if  he  had  times  of  thinking 
he  would  go  back  somehow.  After  he  's  educated  his 
children,  and  got  them  off  his  hands,  and  can  afford  to 
take  risks.  Or,  if  the  worst  comes  to  the  worst,  his  sons 
will  go  one  day." 

"Or  /  might  go,"  said  Jack,  quickly. 

Mar  smiled  and  fell  silent.  Jack  walked  away  with  his 
hands  in  his  breeches  pockets,  and  his  eyes  big  with 
dreams.  The  opening  of  the  door  made  them  both  start. 

"Did  n't  I  tell  you  not  to  get  out  of  that  chair  till 
supper?"  Mrs.  Mar  demanded.  She  stood  there  with  the 
butter  dish  in  one  hand  and  the  milk  pitcher  in  the  other, 
snapping  her  bright  eyes  at  the  culprit. 

He  for  his  part  had  turned  about  sharply,  and  he  fell 
from  the  infinite  skies  with  a  bump. 

"I— I—"  he  stammered,  backing  against  the  book 
case. 

"It  's  on  the  lower  shelf,"  said  Mar,  calmly.  "The 
heavy  brown  book."  Jack  turned  again,  utterly  bewil 
dered,  but  following  the  direction  indicated  by  Mr.  Mar's 
walking-stick. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  39 

"That  's  'Franklin's  Second  Voyage,'  next  the  dic 
tionary.  Yes,  that  's  what  I  want.  I  think,"  he  went 
on  to  his  wife,  as  Jack  stooped  to  obey  him,  "I  think  I 
must  always  keep  a  small  prisoner  in  here,  to  hand  me 
things  out  of  my  reach. ' ' 

She  answered  nothing  as  she  set  down  the  butter  and 
the  milk,  but  she  kept  her  eyes  on  Jack. 

"Oh,  yes,"  he  was  saying  hurriedly,  "vis  is  Fwank- 
lin. ' '  He  carried  the  book  to  his  friend. 

"Fwanklin!"  repeated  that  gentleman  with  affecta 
tion  of  scorn,  as  he  opened  the  book.  ' '  Now,  sir,  go  back 
to  your  seat  and  practice  your  E  's.  It  's  ridiculous  for  a 
boy  of  your  age  to  be  talking  baby  talk. ' ' 

' '  Yes,  sir, ' '  said  Jack,  getting  very  red  as  he  returned 
to  his  place.  Mrs.  Mar  stood  at  the  sideboard  making  a 
dressing  for  the  salad.  Every  now  and  then  she  looked 
over  her  shoulder.  But  Jack  sat  impeccable  in  the  peni 
tential  chair,  saying  softly,  but  with  careful  emphasis : 

"Awound  ve  wugged  wocks  ve  wagged  wascal  wan. 
Awound  ve," — but  his  eyes  were  too  shining  to  show  a 
mind  properly  bent  upon  the  course  pursued  by  that  par 
ticular  wascal. 

After  supper,  while  Mrs.  Mar  was  putting  Trennor 
and  Harry  to  bed,  Jack  Galbraith  looked  everywhere  he 
could  think  of  for  his  book.  No,  Mr.  Mar  had  n  't  seen  it. 
1  '  Here,  I  '11  lend  you  mine.  You  '11  understand  some  of 
the  chapter  about,"— and  he  turned  the  pages  till  he 
found  the  place,  and  he  put  in  a  slip  of  paper.  ' l  There ! 
Franklin  did  n 't  find  what  he  was  looking  for,  but  he  's 
written  the  best  travel  book  I  know." 

"Oh,  fank  you,  sir."  Jack  took  the  big  volume  in 
both  arms,  and  was  making  off  with  it. 


40  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"And  look  here,  Jack,  about  that  other  fellow— the 
man  who  did  find  something  up  there,  you  and  I  won't 
tell  anybody  about  that. ' ' 

' '  Oh ! ' '  He  stopped  and  nodded  at  Mar  over  the  great 
book.  "All  wight.  But  I  may  speak  to  you  about  it 
sometimes —  " 

' '  When  we  're  alone. ' ' 

"All  wight.  Has  n't  he,"  Jack  lowered  his  tone  to 
conspirator's  pitch,  "has  n't  he  ever  told  anybody  but 
you?" 

"Oh,  he  's  told  one  or  two.  But  in  confidence,  you 
know.  People  he  can  trust." 

Jack  pulled  himself  up  proudly.  "I  can  keep  secrets 
like  anyfing. ' '  But  again  he  lowered  his  voice,  and  smil 
ing  delightedly,  "What  do  vey  say,"  he  demanded  with 
lively  anticipation,  "vose  ovvers,  when  vey  hear  about 
it?" 

Mr.  Mar  did  not  answer  instantly. 

Jack  drew  nearer,  still  clasping  the  great  book.  ' '  Oh, 
do  tell  me  what  vey  say. ' ' 

"They— they  think  he  dreamed  it." 

«B— b— but,"  Jack  stuttered  with  indignation, 
"does  n't  he  show  vem  ve  nugget,  and  ve  handkerchief 
wiv  ve — " 

"No,"  said  Mar,  sadly.  "He  lost  that  handkerchief 
somewhere  on  the  tundra. ' ' 


CHAPTER  III 

for  several  years  had  Mar  made  mention 
of  the  far  northern  experience  which,  beside 
laming  him  for  life,  had  as  yet  but  one  visi 
ble  effect  upon  his  circumstances— that  of 
ruining  his  credit  as  a  man  of  judgment 
among  those  nearest  to  him. 

People  had  recognized  Nathaniel  Mar  as  one  marked 
out  for  misfortune,  when,  upon  his  father's  death,  he  had 
been  obliged  to  give  up  his  theological  studies,  and  come 
back  from  college,  to  take  the  first  thing  that  offered  him 
a  little  ready  money  for  the  assistance  of  his  mother.  His 
modest  salary  as  surveyor's  clerk  was  presently  aug 
mented,  in  recognition  of  his  good  draftsmanship  and 
his  surprisingly  quick  mastery  of  the  new  field.  But  it 
was  not  till  the  work  he  did  the  following  year,  over 
in  the  Rock  Hill  district,  brought  him  the  friendship  of 
the  prosperous  young  mine  owner  Galbraith,  that  Mar 
found  an  opportunity  of  following  the  more  scientific 
side  of  his  new  profession.  It  was  Galbraith  who  got 
him  the  post  on  the  Coast  Survey,  that  led  to  Mar's  join 
ing  the  Russian- American  Expedition. 

After  his  return  the  handsome  schoolmistress,  who  had 
reluctantly  said  "no"  to  the  penniless  surveyor,  con 
sented  to  look  with  favor  upon  the  Discoverer  of  Gold  in 
the  new  territory  of  Alaska. 


41 


42  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

But  she  warmly  opposed  Mar's  design  of  going  to  Rock 
Hill  to  share  the  great  secret  with  his  friend  Galbraith. 
No,  indeed !  The  Eock  Hill  mining  magnate  was  in 'small 
need  of  "tips."  It  was  clearly  Mar's  duty  to  give  the 
men  of  Miss  Trennor's  family  the  first  chance  of  joining 
in  this  glorious  scheme  that  was  to  enrich  them  all. 

When  Harriet  Trennor  called  the  Trennor  brothers 
"the  men  of  her  family,"  she  made  the  most  of  what  was 
a  second  cousinship.  It  was  even  the  case  that  she  was 
not  on  very  good  terms  with  those  go-ahead  young  gen 
tlemen;  for  the  Trennors,  in  spite  of  their  prosperity, 
had  never,  as  she  expressed  it,  "done  anything"  for  her. 
It  had  been  for  the  sake  of  her  old  father  that  they  had 
bestirred  themselves  sufficiently  to  recommend  Harriet 
for  the  post  of  assistant  superintendent  of  the  Girls'  Col 
lege  of  Valdivia.  But  after  providing  her  with  an  oppor 
tunity  to  leave  their  common  birthplace  in  St.  Joseph, 
Missouri,  the  Trennors  and  their  respective  wives  had,  in 
point  of  fact,  neglected  Miss  Harriet  to  such  a  degree, 
that  there  would  be  a  certain  magnificence  in  her  heap 
ing  coals  of  fire  on  their  heads.  She,  the  poor  relation, 
whom  they  had  so  little  regarded,  would  put  it  in  the  way 
of  men  merely  well-off  to  become  millionaires.  They 
would  learn  her  worth  at  last ! 

Yes,  yes,  Nathaniel  must  keep  the  great  secret  close,  till 
the  Trennors  (who  were  in  New  York  on  their  yearly  bus 
iness  trip)  should  have  returned.  But  the  affairs  of  the 
brothers  took  them  to  Mexico,  and  their  home  coming  was 
further  delayed. 

While  they  tarried  acute  pneumonia  appeared  upon 
the  Rock  Hill  scene,  and  carried  off  John  Galbraith.  Lit 
tle  part  in  Mar's  grief  at  the  loss  of  his  best-loved  friend 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  43 

was  played  by  the  thought  that  now  he  could  not  count 
upon  his  * '  backing. ' '  Galbraith  took  with  him  out  of  the 
world  something  that  to  a  man  of  Mar's  temperament 
meant  more.  And  at  that  time  he  looked  upon  him 
self  as  possessor  of  a  secret  that  any  capitalist  in  the 
country  would  hold  himself  lucky  to  share.  It  was  not 
till  the  return  of  his  wife's  cousins  that  he  found  there 
could  be  exceptions  to  this  foregone  conclusion. 

As  enterprising  dabblers  in  real  estate  and  mining, 
and  with  the  Palmas  Valley  Bank  behind  them,  the  Tren- 
nor  brothers  were  constantly  being  approached  by  people 
with  schemes  for  making  millions.  Such  persons,  though 
almost  invariably  as  poor  as  Mar,  were  not  often,  the 
Trennor  brothers  agreed,  ready  with  propositions  so  fan 
tastic. 

Alaska  was  in  those  days  further  away  from  men 's  im 
aginations  than  Patagonia.  The  few  people  who  had  any 
thing  to  say  about  the  newly  acquired  territory,  used  it 
only  as  a  club  to  belabor  the  then  secretary  of  state. 
What  had  he  been  thinking  of  to  advise  his  foolish  coun 
try  to  pay  seven  millions  for  the  barren  rocks  and  worth 
less  ice-fields  that  astute  Russia,  after  one  hundred  and 
twenty-six  years'  attempt  at  occupation,  was  so  ready  to 
abandon ! 

"Worthless!"  retorted  Secretary  Seward's  friends. 
"Why,  the  Seal  Islands  alone—" 

' '  Yes,  yes,  the  Seal  Islands  are  alone  on  the  credit  side 
of  the  transaction.  Seward  gave  those  seven  millions  for 
the  two  little  Pribyloffs,  and  the  value  of  Alaska  may  be 
gaged  by  the  fact  that  it  was  just  thrown  in. ' ' 

Was  it  to  be  believed,  the  Trennors  asked,  was  it 
likely  there  was  gold  in  a  place  where  fellows  with  such 


44  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

keen  noses  as  the  Eussians— they  shook  their  heads.  Both 
of  them  shook  their  heads,  for  the  Trennor  brothers  al 
ways  did  everything  together.  Who  could  believe  it  had 
been  left  for  a  man  like  Mar— besides,  that  gold  should 
be  up  there  was  dead  against  the  best  geologic  opinion  of 
the  day.  The  precious  metal  had  never  been  found  un 
der  these  conditions.  There  were  reasons,  scientific  rea 
sons,  as  anybody  but  Mar  would  know,  why  gold 
could  n't  exist  in  just  that  formation  (they  spoke  as  if 
the  vast  new  realm  boasted  but  one).  And,  finally,  even 
if  there  was  gold  in  such  a  place,  how  the  dickens  was  it 
going  to  be  got  out? 

It  was  in  the  talk  about  mining  facilities  that  Mar's 
own  faith  suffered  the  first  of  many  hurts. 

He  was  obliged  to  concede  that  these  astute  young  men 
were  well-informed  as  regards  the  difficulties  and  disap 
pointments  of  mining,  even  in  a  land  where  transport 
was  easy,  food  cheap,  and  labor  plentiful— a  land  blessed 
by  running  water  and  perpetual  summer.  No  less  was 
Mar  constrained  to  admit  that  this  gold  he  believed  he 
had  found  was  hidden  in  a  barren  corner  of  the  utter 
most  North,  where  not  even  an  occasional  tree  promised 
timber  for  sluice  boxes,  where  the  winter  was  nine 
months  long,  and  where,  even  in  summer,  the  soil  six 
inches  below  the  surface  was  welded  with  the  frost  of 
ages. 

They  were  surprised,  the  Trennors  said,  that  any  one 
should  expect  them  to  take  stock  in  such  a— 

Oh,  he  did  n't  (Mar  hastened  to  defend  himself),  he 
did  n't  at  all  expect— it  was  only  that  his  wife  had 
begged  him  to  come  to  them  first. 

And  they  smiled.     They  always  smiled  when  Mar's 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  45 

mad  notion  was  mentioned.  Even  after  it  ceased  to  be 
actually  mentioned,  they  had  for  his  mere  name  a  partic 
ular  kind  of  tolerant,  distant-cousin-by-marriage  smile 
that  said  ' '  poor  Mar, ' '  with  an  accent  on  the  adjective. 

The  new  Mrs.  Mar  was  at  first  boundlessly  indignant 
with  her  kinsmen.  "Never  mind,"  she  adjured  her  hus 
band,  with  flashing  eyes ;  as  soon  as  he  should  be  able  to 
travel,  they  would  go  up  there  themselves.  She  seemed 
unobservant  of  the  fact  that  his  spirits  were  not  raised 
by  her  kind  proposition.  They  would  have  no  trouble, 
she  assured  him,  in  finding  worthier  partners  to  join 
them  in  the  great  scheme  when  once  they  had  "made 
sure. ' ' 

"Made  sure?"  said  Mar,  wincing;  "but  I  have  made 
sure. ' ' 

"Yes,  yes,  of  course.  Still  you  did  lose  the  nugget — 
and  the  gold  dust,  too. ' ' 

For  the  first  time  Mar  changed  the  subject. 

"You  have  n't  anything  to  show,"  she  persisted.  To 
which  he  answered  nothing. 

Shortly  after  they  were  married,  Mar's  mother  became 
very  ill.  The  following  spring  she  died.  Mar's  own 
health  and  spirits  were  a  good  deal  lowered  by  the  surgi 
cal  torment  he  was  called  on  periodically  to  undergo,  as 
amputation  followed  amputation. 

Meanwhile,  without  waiting  to  "go  up  there  and  make 
sure, ' '  two  efforts  on  Mrs.  Mar 's  part  to  interest  moneyed 
men  in  her  husband's  discovery,  resulted  not  alone  in 
failing  to  convince  any  one  else  that  this  was  a  fine  op 
portunity  for  investment,  but  ultimately  in  undermining 
her  own  faith. 

With  the  coming  of  her  first  child  she  prepared  to  cast 


46  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

overboard  the  wild  hope  (she  saw  now  that  it  was  wild) 
of  a  fortune  up  yonder  in  the  ice-fields,  and  showed  her 
self  wisely  ready  to  make  what  she  could  out  of  the  saner 
possibilities  life  presented  in  Valdivia.  Her  cousins  had 
been  right.  She  would  n't  admit  it  to  them— not  yet- 
but  it  was  a  crazy  scheme,  that  notion  of  gold  in  the 
arctic  regions ! 

Dreamer  as  he  was,  Mar  missed  nothing  of  the  in 
tended  effect  when  she  first  ceased  to  talk  about  his  dis 
covery—ceased  to  plan  all  life  with  that  fact  for  its  cor 
ner-stone.  Her  initial  silence  hurt  him  probably  more 
than  the  half -veiled  taunts  of  a  later  time.  It  was  all  the 
difference  between  the  shrinking  of  an  open  wound  and 
the  dull  beating  of  an  ancient  cicatrice. 

Not  only,  as  time  went  on,  did  she  resent  the  illusion 
she  had  been  under,  but,  as  is  common  with  women  of 
her  type,  her  husband 's  greater  significance  since  mother 
hood  had  come  to  her,  made  her  increasingly  dread  that 
foolish  infatuation  of  his.  She  foresaw  that  a  continued 
faith  in  the  value  of  his  '  *  find ' '  would  stand  between  him 
and  energetic  pursuit  of  fortune  in  any  other  direction. 
So  it  was  that  the  North  was  not  merely  for  her,  as  time 
went  on,  the  type  of  a  shattered  dream— it  came  to  be 
her  and  her  babies'  rival  in  tl\is  man's  thoughts.  This 
man— who  owed  to  them  all  his  thoughts,  all  his  faith 
and  energy— he  was  divided  in  his  allegiance. 

And  not  in  dreams  alone  might  he  desert  them.  He 
might  even  conceivably  insist,  against  all  rational  advice 
and  plain  duty,  he  might  insist  on  going  back  there! 
The  mere  idea  of  his  fatuous  clinging  to  the  old  plan 
came  to  exercise  over  her  an  almost  uncanny  power  for 
misery.  Not  that  he  continued  openly  to  admit  his  pre- 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  47 

occupation.  But  it  was  there— she  was  sure  of  that— in 
his  head,  more  properly  in  his  heart,  his  refuge,  his  dar 
ling,  his  delight.  She  came  to  feel  for  it  the  hatred,  and 
to  have  before  it  the  involuntarily  nerve  recoil,  that  lies 
for  some  wives  in  the  thought  of  another  woman.  What 
if  she  never  succeeded  in  rooting  the  fancy  out  of  his 
brain  ?  How  was  she  at  least  to  make  sure  of  preventing 
his  squandering  time  and  money  in  pursuit  of  it?— now, 
when  she  could  not  go  too,  and  when  his  going  would 
mean  (as  she  honestly  thought)  disaster  to  her  and  to 
the  children  and  the  humiliation  of  falling  back  for  cou 
sinly  help  on  those  wise  young  Missourians,  who  had  seen 
at  once  the  madness  of  the  scheme. 

She  patched  up  the  breach  with  her  two  kinsmen,  and 
induced  them  to  offer  her  husband  a  small  position  in 
their  bank. 

That  would  hold  him. 

But  although  she  succeeded  in  seeing  the  cripple  made 
teller — as  a  first  step,  she  was  firmly  convinced,  on  the 
road  to  a  partnership— she  was  not  delivered  from  her 
fear.  The  unspoken  dread  that  he  might  throw  aside  the 
humble,  though  precious,  "sure  thing"  for  this  chimera 
beckoning  from  the  North— the  dread  of  it  became  the 
main  factor  in  their  spiritual  relation.  For  not  only  did 
she  never  free  herself  from  her  grudging  love  of  the  man 
—and  never,  therefore,  from  her  shrinking  at  the  pros 
pect  of  separation— not  only  did  she  conceive  of  him  in 
the  American  way  as  the  property  of  his  family  and 
bound  as  bondsmen  are  to  serve  them  to  the  end,  but  in 
addition  to  all  that,  more  and  more  as  the  years  went  on, 
did  she  come  profoundly  to  disbelieve  in  the  validity  of 
his  story. 


48  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

' '  Do  you  still  think  you  may  go  back  there  one  day  ? ' ' 
she  burst  out  on  one  occasion,  looking  darkly  at  the  rec 
onnaissance  map  that  hung  on  the  dining-room  wall. 
Mar  mumbled  something  about  the  satisfaction  in  the 
verifying  of  an  impression. 

"Verifying  what?  How  do  you  verify  pure  fancy?" 
Then  turning  suddenly  upon  him,  "If  ever  you  do  go, 
you  '11  only  be  giving  a  fantastic  reason  for  a  restless 
man 's  longing  to  leave  his  home. ' ' 

At  moments  conceived  by  her  to  be  critical,  she  would 
toss  at  him  the  reproach  of  his  well-known  visionariness, 
and  all  their  old  foolish  hope  and  its  utter  loss  would  be 
held  up  to  scorn  in  her  saying,  apropos  of  something 
quite  foreign :  ' '  That  's  like  some  one  I  once  knew  who 
wanted  people  to  believe  in  a  miracle.  But  not  without 
proof,  he  said.  He  had  proof —absolute  proof —only  he  'd 
lost  it. ' '  Or,  less  offensive,  but  for  Mar  no  less  pointed, 
the  form  of  skepticism  his  loss  of  the  nugget  had  crystal 
lized  for  her,  "You  've  got  to  have  something  to  show 
to  a  Missourian." 

This  was  later  not  only  adopted  by  her  boys  as  a  favor 
ite  family  gibe,  but  introduced  into  their  school,  and 
thence  spread  abroad  as  a  foolish  and  pointless  saying 
sometimes  will,  no  one  quite  knowing  why,  till  all  of  that 
generation,  whatever  their  origin,  would  say  with  a  wag 
of  the  head:  "You  Ve  got  to  show  me— I  'm  from  Mis 
souri,"  whenever  they  wished  to  announce  themselves 
acute  fellows  by  no  means  to  be  taken  in. 

As  to  the  particular  matter  that  gave  rise  to  the  say 
ing,  Mrs.  Mar's  strong  personal  feeling  about  it  was  aug 
mented  by  outside  circumstances.  Stories  of  failure  in 
gold  mining  were  too  rife  and  tco  well-attested  not  to 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  49 

have  a  significance  difficult  to  disregard.  Blameless  mis 
fortune  as  well  as  wholesale  swindling,  were  so  much  the 
order  of  the  day  in  the  West,  that  men  of  business  like 
the  Trennors,  when  they  wanted  to  promote  some  mining 
scheme,  must  needs  have  recourse  to  the  gorgeous  East. 
New  York  had  plenty  of  money  for  "wildcat"  schemes. 
But  no  place,  the  wise  would  tell  you,  like  conservative 
old  Boston  for  floating  a  risky  concern.  New  Englanders 
were  at  that  distance  which  lends  enchantment.  For 
them  gold  mining  is  still  a  form  of  romance— the  mere 
thought  of  it  goes  to  the  head  like  wine. 

But  Valdivia  was  neither  near  enough  to  the  mining 
centers  to  catch  the  fever,  nor  yet  so  far  away  but  what 
her  citizens  mightily  feared  infection.  Had  not  their 
townsman,  Ben  "White,  lost  his  head  and  his  fortune  over 
at  Huerfano  Creek?  Was  n't  there  young  Andrews  for 
a  warning ! 

No  catastrophe  of  this  kind  in  their  little  world  lost 
through  Mrs.  Mar's  agency  any  of  its  ironic  usefulness  as 
illustration.  She  succeeded  not  only  in  making  her  hus 
band  doubt  the  wisdom  of  giving  up  a  sure  thing  in  the 
bank,  to  claim  an  unworkable  gold  mine,  but  little  by 
little,  as  the  rain  and  the  weather  wear  away  the  sharp 
outlines  of  a  stone  inscription,  so  for  Nathaniel  Mar  the 
years  and  the  unbelief  about  him  brought  a  gradual  blur 
ring  of  the  picture,  till  even  to  himself  its  early  outlines 
were  a  little  dimmed. 

To  revive  its  actuality,  more  than  for  any  other  pur 
pose,  nearly  ten  years  after  he  had  told  the  story  to  little 
Jack  Galbraith,  he  told  it  again  to  Mr.  Elihu  H.  Cox. 
The  man  listened  with  such  a  look  in  his  big,  fishy  eyes, 
in  a  silence  so  galling,  that  Mar  interposed  hurriedly: 


50  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"And  there  's  one  capital  thing  about  it.  It  's  safe 
enough.  If  the  gold  's  there,  it  certainly  won't  run 
away,"  and  abruptly  changed  the  subject;  though  to 
hear  himself  saying  ' '  if  it  's  there, ' '  rankled  in  his  mem 
ory  like  apostasy.  He  would  never  tell  the  story  again 
till  his  boys  were  grown  and  he  told  it  to  them.  They 
would  believe  him.  They,  with  youth  and  four  sound 
legs  between  them,  they  would  go  up  there  and  justify 
the  long  faith. 

For  fear  that  he  might  die  before  they  were  old  enough 
to  be  indoctrinated,  he  wrote  out  as  circumstantial  an 
account  as  he  could  between  intervals  of  black  despair  at 
finding  how  dim  were  certain  details.  He  grappled  with 
the  horror  and  saw  it  recede  before  the  draftsman 's  skill 
and  his  peerless  satisfaction  in  preparing  careful  dia 
grams  and  a  map  to  larger  scale.  There  was  an  effect  of 
mathematical  accuracy  about  these  illustrations  of  his 
account  that  gave  him  back  his  confidence.  If  there  was 
'  any  trifling  difference  between  these  data  and  those  fur 
nished  upon  his  return,  the  apparent  discrepancy  lay  in 
the  essential  impressionism  of  mere  words.  The  compass 
and  the  rule  can't  lie.  He  put  the  precious  document 
away  with  his  will,  in  the  vault  of  the  Palmas  Valley 
Bank,  but  he  did  not  put  away  the  thought  of  it.  On  the 
contrary,  he  kept  it  by  him  day  and  night,  turning  it 
over  in  his  mind  with  the  rich  comfort  of  the  man  who 
reflects  that  he  will  leave  to  his  children  a  handsome  in 
heritance  and  a  fund  of  gratitude.  Something  in  this 
case  that  partook  of  the  nature  of  a  paternal  life-insur 
ance—the  kind  of  thing  that  had  not  profited,  could  not 
profit  the  giver,  except  as  it  profited  him  to  feel  that  for 
all  his  appearance  of  being  one  of  life's  failures,  he  yet 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  51 

had  insured  his  children  against  the  meaner  assaults  of 
fortune.  For  this  "  policy "  that  he  held  for  them  was 
"paid  up."  Oh,  yes,  Nathaniel  Mar  had  paid  heavily— 
not  yearly,  but  daily,  almost  hourly,  for  his  lien  upon  the 
riches  of  the  North. 

The  thought  of  the  gold-shotted  creek  between  the 
Great  Stone  Anvil  and  the  arctic  circle  comforted  him 
not  least  when  he  looked  at  his  little  daughter.  It  was 
good  to  know— the  knowledge  helped  him  through  many 
a  difficult  hour— that  Hildegarde  would  never  be  forced 
to  join  the  ever  fuller  ranks  of  the  bread-winning 
women.  It  would  be  no  hurt  to  her  that,  however  great 
an  heiress  she  might  be,  she  had  been  frugally  brought 
up. 

There  was  something  large  and  fine  and  tranquil  about 
the  Scandinavian-looking  girl,  whom  her  parents  had 
called  by  the  stately  northern  name  with  more  luck  than 
attends  many  a  christening— since  it  is  well-known  Vic 
toria  is,  like  as  not,  to  take  on  an  aspect  depressed  and 
down-trodden;  Grace  to  turn  out  clumsy  and  hideous; 
while  Ivy  shows  a  sturdy  independence,  and  Blanche  and 
Lily  grows  swarthy  as  a  squaw. 

But  the  fact  was  that  the  little  Mar  girl  was  named 
Harriet  Hildegarde,  and  was  even  called  "Hattie"  till 
she  was  nearly  twelve,  when,  after  remarking  one  day, 
"I  don't  look  like  a  Hattie,  and  I  'm  not  going  to  be  a 
Hattie,"  she  refused  thereafter  to  hear  the  obnoxious  di 
minutive  and  quietly  but  firmly  coerced  her  family  and 
her  schoolmates  into  saying  "Hildegarde,"  if  they 
wanted  her  to  notice  them. 

Mrs.  Mar  was  grieved  to  find  that  her  only  daughter 
had  no  conspicuous  talents,  and  was  not  even  a  girl  of 


52  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

spirit— lacked,  moreover,  the  will  to  cultivate  that  affec 
tation  of  being  spirited,  which  goes  in  America  by  the 
name  of  "brightness."  But  she  was  not  a  bad  sort  of 
little  girl  after  all ;  she  got  her  lessons,  and  played  games 
with  a  certain  boyish  gusto,  and  gardened  with  a  patient 
devotion  that  her  mother  thought  worthy  of  a  better 
cause.  But  Mrs.  Mar  consoled  herself  for  the  girl's  lack 
of  brilliancy  by  reflecting  that  Hildegarde  was  probably 
going  to  be  handsome  and  that  men  were  great  donkeys 
and  might  never  find  out  that  she  was  slow. 

Hildegarde  herself  was  conscious  of  her  shortcom 
ings—without  the  knowledge  overwhelming  her.  Life 
was  going  to  be  very  good,  even  if  she  was  n't  at  the  head 
of  the  class,  or  a  shining  light  at  the  school  commence 
ments.  She  had  no  talent  for  music,  and  quite  as  little 
for  recitation.  It  was  something  to  hear  her  saying,  in 
the  famous  garden  scene— 

"Geh'  falsche  gleissnerische  Konigin 
Wie  du  die  Welt  so  tausch'  ich  Dich— " 

in  a  tone  of  unruffled  courtesy  and  with  a  brow  serene. 
When  the  fiery  Madeleine  Smulsky  took  her  off  with, 
"This  is  Hildegarde  laying  dark  plots— now  she  's  doing 
foul  murder,"  and  proceeded  to  translate  her  friend's 
large  tranquillity  into  the  feverish  terms  of  picturesque 
wickedness,  the  effect  was  distinctly  diverting.  Even 
Hildegarde  laughed.  For  she  got  over  "minding."  It 
was  when  she  was  quite  little  that  she  had  suffered  most, 
and  from  the  scorn  of  her  own  family.  Her  brothers 
were  both  "such  very  bright  boys,"  and  her  mother  she 
knew  to  be  enormously  clever.  It  had  been  painful  to 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  53 

feel  that  beside  these  richly  dowered  ones,  she  was  ' '  next 
door  to  an  idiot."  She  made  no  outward  struggle 
against  the  verdict  of  her  family,  accepting  it  as  many 
a  young  creature  will,  without  a  doubt  of  its  being  as 
just  as  final.  But,  fortunately,  hers  was  a  nature  too 
sane  and  sunny  for  her  to  run  the  risk  many  children  do 
of  coming  nervously  to  dread,  and  so  making  true,  a 
prophecy  having  no  foundation  in  necessity.  When  she 
discovered  that  she  had  competent  hands — hands  with 
which  she  could  perform  all  manner  of  pleasant  domestic 
miracles— that  gradually,  and  because  of  her,  the  house 
was  transformed  and  the  garden  made  to  smile;  that, 
moreover  (assuring  her  of  a  hold  upon  the  fine  arts,  too), 
she  could  tell  ghost  stories  that  made  her  school  friends 
gibber  with  excitement,  the  girl  felt  agreeably  conscious 
that  her  destiny  after  all  was  maybe  larger  than  the 
family  eye  had  been  able  to  discern. 

When  Hildegarde  was  sixteen  a  new  pupil  appeared  at 
the  Valdivia  School  for  Young  Ladies.  A  little  girl 
hardly  twelve,  delicate,  pretty,  appealing,  yet  self-suf 
ficing;  so  backward  in  some  of  her  studies,  and  so  ad 
vanced  in  others,  that  she  could  not  be  entered  in  either 
the  upper  primary  or  lower  academic  classes,  but  was 
sent  to  recite  arithmetic  and  geography  with  the  infants, 
Latin  with  the  first  academic  girls,  and  French  with  the 
second  collegiates— young  ladies  four  to  six  years  older 
than  little  Bella  Wayne. 

She  was  a  boarder,  and  it  was  said  her  parents  had  put 
her  under  the  special  care  of  Miss  Gillow,  the  principal. 
She  even  had  special  dishes  cooked  for  her,  and  the  fact 
that  these  "milk  puddings"  (as  it  seemed  they  were 
called)  were  plainer  than  the  food  set  before  the  other 


54  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

boarders,  did  nothing  to  mitigate  the  offensiveness  of  the 
distinction.  Certainly  the  principal  accorded  the  ''new 
girl"  so  many  privileges  that  a  strong  party  sprang  up 
against  her. 

Hildegarde,  even  before  a  certain  .day  of  wrath,  had 
found  herself  unconsciously  absorbed  in  watching  this 
thin  slip  of  prettiness,  who  looked  as  if  a  puff  of  wind 
would  blow  her  away,  who  ought  to  have  carried  herself 
humbly,  if  not  actually  depressed,  in  her  capacity  of  un- 
classifiable  new-comer,  and  who  yet  walked  about  with 
her  little  nose  in  the  air,  as  if  she  despised  Valdivia,  and 
especially  scorned  the  critical  young  ladies  of  Valdivia 's 
celebrated  school. 

It  did  not  help  her  good  standing  that  she  showed  her 
self  indifferent  to  an  opportunity  of  joining  the  Busy 
Bees.  Now,  the  Busy  Bees  were  a  very  popular  organiza 
tion  which  not  only  sewed  on  alternate  Saturday  after 
noons  at  the  rectory,  but  danced  with  an  equal  regularity, 
in  various  other  places,  and  organized  a  bazaar  once  a 
year  in  the  Masonic  Hall.  Besides  the  gaiety  of  this 
function,  there  was  a  fine  flavor  of  philanthropy  about 
the  regular  application  of  the  proceeds  to  the  clothing 
and  educating  of  a  little  Hindu  girl,  who  was  able 
strangely  soon  to  write  pious  letters  to  the  young  ladies 
of  Valdivia— letters  in  which  she  seemed  to  get  even  with 
her  benefactors  by  saying  that  she  never  forgot  to  pray 
for  them.  The  Bees  had  had  the  joy  of  deciding  by  what 
name  their  protege  should  be  christened.  As  there  were 
three  Marys  and  six  Trennors  among  them,  the  little 
Hindu  was  called  Mary  Trennor,  and  every'properly  con 
stituted  girl  felt  pledged  for  Mary  Trennor 's  material 
and  spiritual  welfare— that  is,  every  girl  in  Valdivia 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  55 

whose  fortunate  social  condition  permitted  her  to  aspire 
to  wear  the  badge  of  the  Golden  Bee.  It  followed  that 
the  new  girl  was  not  properly  constituted  when  she  de 
clined  the  honor.  It  was  even  apparent  that  her  heart 
was  not  in  the  right  place.  For  when  Beatrice  Trennor 
most  forbearingly  showed  the  new  girl  the  framed 
photograph  of  the  Hindu  convert,  in  order  to  stimulate 
interest  in  the  cause,  Miss  Bella  Wayne  turned  from  it 
with  the  observation,  "She  's  ugly.  I  shan't  do  a  single 
thing  for  such  a  hideous  little  girl.  I  don't  think  they 
ought  to  be  encouraged. ' ' 

It  was  plain,  therefore,  that  she  thought  too  much  of 
good  looks,  and  was  a  stony-hearted  monster. 

"Serves  her  right,"  said  primaries,  academics  and 
collegiates  all  with  one  voice,  when  Bella  Wayne,  having 
for  a  week  daily  put  the  arithmetic  class  to  shame,  was 
banished  to  Miss  Maclver's  room  to  spend  two  hours  in 
austere  solitude  over  the  lesson  of  the  day. 

Hildegarde  had  got  special  permission  to  go  for  ten 
minutes  after  school  hours  to  visit  Madeleine  Smulsky 
(also  a  boarder),  who  was  in  bed  with  a  violent  cold. 
Coming  down-stairs,  as  Hildegarde  passed  Miss  Mac 
lver's  room  she  saw  the  door  cautiously  open.  A  spec 
tacled  eye  gleamed  strangely  low  down  in  the  aperture 
for  one  of  Miss  Maclver's  height,  and  then  the  owner  of 
the  eye,  as  if  reassured  by  the  look  of  things  outside, 
opened  the  door  a  little  wider,  and  the  apparition  stood 
fully  revealed.  Miss  Maclver,  many  inches  shorter  than 
anybody  had  ever  seen  her  before,  and  narrowed  in  pro 
portion,  the  familiar  crochet  shawl  hanging  dowdily 
over  one  shoulder,  the  stiff -held  head  ornamented  with 
the  front  of  sandy  curls,  a  gouty  finger  held  crookedly 


56  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

up,  the  effect  of  cold  in  the  nose  faithfully  reproduced  as 
the  voice  twanged  out  : 

"Neow  young  ladies,  observe—"  It  was  the  arith 
metic  teacher  to  the  life,  only  it  was  Bella  Wayne,  with 
her  perky  little  nose  supporting  huge  round  spectacles, 
and  her  baby  mouth  pursed  in  severity  repeating  the 
rule,  ' '  One  or  bore  of  the  decibal  divisiods  of  a  unid  are 
galled  a  decibal  fragtion." 

Hildegarde  had  stopped,  stared,  and. was  seized  with 
uncontrollable  giggles.  Madeleine  Smulsky,  hearing 
these  demonstrations,  got  up  out  of  bed  and  made  all 
haste  to  thrust  her  bare  toes  through  the  banisters,  and 
crane  a  tousled  head  far  enough  over  the  rail  to  discover 
what  was  happening  below.  Her  ecstatic  merriment  in 
duced  Miss  Wayne  to  come  further  into  the  hall,  and 
reprove  her  with  a  supple  young  finger  stiffly  crooked, 
and  speaking  not  only  with  a  cold  in  the  head,  but  with 
that  intolerable  click  in  the  nose  of  the  sufferer  from 
chronic  catarrh— 

"I  would  lige  yeou  do  observe  there  is  a  sbezial  beaudy 
aboud  the  laws  of  bathebadigs—  Again  the  dreadful 
noise  in  the  impudent  little  nose.  Madeleine's  attempt 
to  suppress  her  laughter  brought  on  a  fit  of  coughing, 
which,  with  a  spasmodic  suddenness,  choked  and  died  in 
her  throat.  For  all  of  a  sudden  there  were  three  figures 
in  the  hall  below,  and  one  of  them  was  the  real  Miss  Mac- 
Iver,  saying  to  herself  in  miniature : 

"And  now,  Miss  Wayne,  you  may  take  off  my  shawl, 

and  my  skirt,  and  my  glasses."     (Not  a  syllable  about 

the  opulent  front.)    "And  in  ten  minutes  go  and  report 

to  the  principal." 

As  the  real  Miss  Maclver,  six  feet  of  indignation, 


It  was  the  teacher  of  arithmetic  to  the  life,  only  it  was 
Bella  Wayne  » 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  57 

turned  away  trembling  with  fury,  she  looked  back  an  in 
stant  over  her  shoulder  to  say:  "You  or  I,  Biss  Wayne, 
bust  leave  Valdivia— ' 

But  Bella  had  already  vanished  into  the  room  of  peni 
tence,  and  was  feverishly  pulling  off  her  strange  habili 
ments.  The  bare  toes  of  Miss  Smulsky  had  been  hur 
riedly  withdrawn  from  between  the  banisters,  and  any 
girl  but  Hildegarde  Mar  would  have  been  fleeing  down 
the  staircase,  "and  so  home."  But  she  walked  quietly 
away,  her  large  deliberateness  even  a  little  emphasized 
as  she  went,  weighed  down  by  fearful  speculation  as  to 
what  form  of  retribution  would  overtake  the  wicked,  new 
girl. 

Hildegarde  went  to  school  the  next  morning  ten  min 
utes  earlier  than  usual.  No  one  yet  in  the  big  school 
room,  so  she  wandered  restlessly  through  the  empty  halls, 
wishing  she  dared  go  up-stairs  and  compare  notes  with 
Madeleine.  From  a  window  at  the  back,  looking  out  on 
a  group  of  eucalyptus  trees  and  a  mass  of  syringa,  she 
saw  little  Bella  Wayne  sitting  very  subdued  on  the  top 
most  of  two  stone  steps ;  slate  on  knee  and  pencil  poised, 
but  eyes  fastened  on  a  woodpecker  tap-tap-tapping  at  the 
tree. 

Hildegarde  wTent  out  and  spoke  kindly  to  the  unlucky 
little  girl.  ' '  What  's  happened  since—  ? ' ' 

* '  Nothing  much, ' '  and  Bella  put  up  her  chin. 

"Are  you— are  you  going  away?" 

"  Me  ?  No. ' '  And  with  that  she  dropped  her  slate  and 
pencil  on  the  step,  dropped  her  face  into  her  two  hands, 
and  wept. 

Hildegarde  thought  she  had  misheard— it  must  be 
that  Bella  was  crying  because  she  was  expelled.  After 


58  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

all  Hildegarde  had  expected  she  would  be  expelled. 
What  she  had  not  expected  was  that  she,  one  of  the  big 
girls,  would  be  so  sorry  to  hear  that  this  was  the  last  she 
should  see  of  little  Bella  Wayne.  Hildegarde  picked  up 
the  broken  slate,  and  tried  to  think  of  something  com 
forting. 

"I  was  sure  they  'd  send  me  home,"  Bella  sobbed. 
' '  But  they  w-won  't !  Not  even  if  I  d-don  't  beg  her  p-par- 
don." 

' '  And  you  want  to  be  sent  home ! ' ' 

"Of  course!"  Bella  got  out  a  handkerchief  three 
inches  square  and  dabbed  her  eyes. 

"Was  that  why  you  did  it?" 

1 1  No.  It  would  have  been  if  I  'd  thought  she  'd  come 
and  catch  me.  But— no— I  did  it  because— oh,  because 
there  was  n't  any  other  earthly  thing  to  do  in  that 
room!"  she  said,  with  a  burst.  Then,  more  collectively: 
' '  Were  you  ever  in  Miss  Maclver  's  room  ? ' ' 

' '  No.  I  Ve  always  been  rather  afraid  of  Miss  Maclver. ' ' 

"Well,  wait  till  you  Ve  seen  her  room— and  her 
family!  You  '11  be  'f raider  than  ever.  The  only  pic 
tures  she  has  in  there  are  photographs  of  a  lot  of  night- 
marey  people  all  just  like  her.  Oh,  it  was  dreadful  being 
shut  up  there  with  millions  of  Maclvers!  I  did  every 
thing  I  could  think  of  to  forget  'em.  I  looked  at  all  her 
dull  books.  Then  I  smelt  all  her  bottles— they  are  n't 
so  dull.  Do  you  know  she  's  got  seventeen  on  her  wash- 
stand?" 

"Not  bottles!" 

"Bottles.  When  I  'd  smelt  them  all— some  very  queer 
—what  else  was  there  to  take  your  mind  off  those  pic 
tures  but  to  try  on  her  things  ? ' ' 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  59 

The  three-minute  bell  began  to  ring,  and  Hildegarde 
went  back  to  the  school-room. 

Bella  did  not  reappear  among  her  kind  for  twenty-four 
hours.  Some  said  she  'd  already  gone  home.  Others 
said  no,  she  was  waiting  till  her  mother  came  for  her. 
Certainly  Miss  Maclver  made  no  sign;  but  her  cold 
seemed  better. 

Upon  resuming  her  place  the  next  day,  Bella,  still 
with  her  nose  in  the  air,  publicly  announced  that  she  had 
begged  Miss  Maclver 's  pardon. 

"How  did  they  make  you  do  it?"  Hildegarde  asked 
the  little  girl  at  recess. 

The  wicked  Miss  Wayne  was  again  sitting  solitary  on 
the  stone  steps  among  the  shrubbery  at  the  back,  holding 
on  her  knees  a  new  slate,  the  lower  part  covered  with 
neat  little  figures— the  upper  elegantly  decorated  with 
dragons. 

" Nobody  made  me,"  answered  Bella,  while  she  care 
fully  shaded  the  scaly  coil  on  the  monster's  tail.  "The 
door  was  a  little  bit  open— Miss  Maclver 's  door— and  I 
saw  her  packing  up.  Then  she  looked  out  and  caught  me 
peeking  at  her. ' ' 

' '  Heavens ! ' '  breathed  Hildegarde,  so  overcome  she  sat 
down.  "What  happened  then?" 

"Oh,  I  went  in." 

"She  called  you?" 

"No." 

' '  You  did  n  't  go  in  without  being  made  to  1 " 

"Yes,  I  did." 

' '  Gracious !  How  could  you,  Bella  ? ' ' 

"I  thought  I  'd  better.  I  went  in  and  asked  her  par 
don." 


60  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

" What  did  she  say?" 

"She  just"— the  outrageous  Bella  made  the  obnoxious 
clicking  in  her  nose.  "Do  you  know  she  's  only  got  two 
dresses  ? ' ' 

"Yes,  I  Ve  noticed." 

"But  she  's  very  well  off  for  fronts." 

"Is  she?" 

Bella  nodded.    ' '  Got  three. ' ' 

"You  don't  mean  to  tell  me,  Bella  Wayne,  Miss  Mac- 
Iver  's  got  three  false  fronts !" 

"Yes,  she  has.  And  the  weeest  little,  teenty-weenty 
trunk,  she  's  got.  But  it  's  quite  big  enough.  I  could 
see  she  had  n  't  anything,  hardly,  to  put  in  it.  Only  bot 
tles  and  fronts.  After  I  7d  begged  pardon,  and  was 
going  out,  I  suddenly  thought  she  must  be  pretty  poor, 
even  if  she  did  have  such  a  lot  of —do  you  suppose  it  's 
because  she  can 't  afford  hats  ?  Well,  I  don 't  know.  Any 
how  I  asked  her  what  school  she  was  going  to  after  this. 
She  said  she  did  n 't  know.  Then  I  looked  at  those  night- 
marey  Maclvers  and  asked  her  if  she  was  going  home. 
She  suddenly  began  to  look  awfuller  than  ever.  I  saw 
she  was  thinking  about  the  Maclvers,  too,  and  it  was 
'most  more  than  she  could  bear.  So  I  ran  back  and 
begged  her  not  to  go.  I  said  I  did  so  need  her." 
"You  needed  her?" 

"Yes,  to— to  teach  me  decimal  fractions."  Bella 
brought  out  the  words  a  little  shamefaced.  Then,  hur 
riedly,  as  if  to  forestall  misapprehension :  ' '  Oh,  I  said  I 
knew  it  was  n't  much  of  an  attraction  for  her— of  course, 
it  must  be  perfectly  horrid  to  have  a  girl  like  me  in  the 
arithmetic  class.  But,  after  all"— Bella  paused,  and 
then,  with  the  air  of  a  discoverer  of  one  of  the  deeper 
mysteries  of  nature— "after  all,  Miss  Maclver  likes  ham- 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  61 

mering  those  disgusting  rules  into  girls.  What  she  hates 
is  to  think  there  's  a  girl  going  round  without  those  rules 
somewhere  inside  her.  So  I  just  told  her  that  wherever 
she  was  going  she  would  n't  find  anybody  who  knew  as 
little  about  fractions  as  I  did.  I  was  certain  I  told  her, 
perfectly  certain,  that  she  could  show  me  all  about  'em 
if  only  she  was  n  't  going  away.  One  thing  was  sure  as  a 
gun— I  was  never  going  to  let  anybody  else  teach  me! 
She  said  something  about  that.  It  was  the  first  time  she 
spoke,  and  she  stood  like  this,  with  her  flannel  petticoat 
in  one  hand,  and  a  bottle  in  the  other.  But  I  just  said : 
'Seven  people  have  tried  it  already,  and  you  know  if 
they  succeeded.  There  's  only  one  person  in  the  world 
that  can  make  me  understand  those  disgusting  rules.' 
And  I  went  quite  close  to  her,  and  I  said :  '  Miss  Maclver, 
cross  my  heart  and  hope  I  may  die,  if  ever  I  let  anybody 
else  speak  to  me  about  fractions ! '  So  we  agreed  it  was 
her  duty  to  stay.  But  now  the  awful  thing  is  I  Ve  got 
to  do  these  sickening  sums !  Is  n 't  it  terrible  what  a  lot  of 
trouble  you  can  make  for  yourself,  just  all  in  a  minute  ?" 

' '  Well,  I  hope  you  '11  stick  to  your  part  of  the  bargain, 
Bella, ' '  said  the  big  girl,  smiling. 

' '  Got  to— got  to ! "  said  the  luckless  one,  flourishing  her 
pencil  over  the  biggest  of  the  dragons.  "  If  I  don 't  she  11 
go  away  and  starve  with  the  rest  of  the  Maclvers;  or 
drink  up  all  those  medicine  bottles,  and  die  in  a  wink- 
like  that!" 

"Look  here,  shall  I  just  see  if  you  're  going  the  right 
way  about  it  ? " 

"Oh,  thank  you,"— Bella  relinquished  the  slate  with 
alacrity— "only  be  careful  not  to  rub  out  my  dragons. 
They  keep  my  mind  off  the  Maclvers. ' ' 

And  that  was  how  the  friendship  began. 


CHAPTER  IV 

fATHANIEL  MAR  made  the  mistake  of 
thinking  that  you  can  put  off  to  a  given 
date  impressing  your  good  judgment  on 
those  who  share  your  life. 

Trenn  and  Harry  had  an  affection  for 
their  father— that  he  without  difficulty  inspired— but  in 
their  heart  of  hearts  they  were  a  little  ashamed  of  their 
love  for  him,  as  a  species  of  weakness.  They  frankly  de 
spised  his  laissez-aller  way  of  life,  and  looked  upon  him 
as  a  warning.  Their  mother  had  seen  to  that. 

The  Mar  boys,  however,  had  shown  business  capacity 
from  their  childhood,  when  instead  of  buying  ''peanut 
brittle"  and  going  to  the  circus,  they  saved  up  their 
money  to  invest  in  hens.  They  made  what  their  mother 
called  "a  pretty  penny"  by  selling  fresh  eggs  to  the 
neighbors.  The  thriving  young  tradesmen  made  even 
their  mother  pay .  for  whatever  she  required,  and  she 
''planked  down  the  cash"  without  a  murmur.  It  was  a 
small  price  for  the  holy  satisfaction  of  seeing  that  her 
children  were  early  learning  the  value  of  money. 

Mar  got  less  pleasure  out  of  his  sons '  budding  business 
instincts.  He  was  even  obviously  annoyed  when  he  dis 
covered  that  Trenn  helped  Eddie  Cox  with  his  lessons, 
not  out  of  good  comradeship,  but  at  the  rate  of  "two 
bits"  for  each  half -hour's  aid. 

62 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  63 

"It  's  ugly,"  said  Mar,  with  unusual  spirit.  His  wife 
felt  obliged  to  point  out  that  she  herself  had  been  en 
gaged  in  very  much  the  same  occupation,  when  he  first 
met  her.  The  l '  ugliness ' '  of  being  paid  for  helping  peo 
ple  with  their  studies  had  not  oppressed  him  then. 

"You  were  their  teacher,"  said  her  husband. 

"And  Trenn  is  Eddie's  teacher  while  he  's  teaching 
him!"  Then  as  Mar  opened  his  lips,  she  quickly  closed 
the  argument  by  adding,  "Besides,  Eddie's  father  has 
made  money  and  Trenn 's  father  has  n  't.  Eddie  Cox  will 
have  to  buy  brains  all  his  life— he  may  just  as  well  be 
gin  now. ' ' 

Trenn  Mar  was  not  yet  nineteen  when  he  was  so  fortu 
nate  as  to  have  two  business  openings.  One  was  to  go 
down  to  a  ranch  in  southern  California  and  round  up 
cattle  for  Karl  Siegel,  and  learn  all  he  could  for  Trenn 
Mar.  The  other,  to  enter  the  employment  of  Messrs. 
Wilks  &  Simpson,  of  the  Croesus  Creek  Mining  Company. 

Trenn 's  father  meant  him  to  take  the  latter— in  fact 
he  had  put  himself  to  an  uncommon  amount  of  trouble 
to  get  his  son  this  opening.  But  Trenn  was  all  for  the 
cattle  business.  "Besides,  look  at  what  Siegel  offers. 
It  's  wonderful !  Those  men  usually  expect  a  young  fel 
low  to  buy  his  experience.  But  Siegel—" 

"Yes,"  agreed  Mar;  "it  looks  better  to  start  with,  but 
that  's  not  the  main  thing.  You  must  look  ahead." 

Trenn  opened  his  brown  eyes.  He  even  grinned. 
' '  Why  yes,  I  mean  to. ' ' 

"With  Wilks  &  Simpson  you  '11  get  the  hang  of  the 
best  managed  placer-mining  property  in  California." 

But  that  whole  blessed  country  is  prospected  already. 
There  's  no  money  in  it  for  me." 


64  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

' '  That  's  precisely  what  there  is  in  it. ' ' 

Trenn  looked  about  the  room,  impatient  to  be  gone. 
What  did  his  father  know  about  money?  Less  than 
many  a  sharp  boy  of  twelve. 

" Sound  mining  knowledge,"  he  was  saying,  "will  be 
very  useful.  Not  only  for  itself,  but  because  it  will 
bring  you  into  business  contact  with  mining  men." 

"What  good  '11  that  do  me?"  demanded  the  boy,  im 
patiently.  "We  have  n't  got  any  capital." 

'  *  No,  they  'II  have  the  capital.  You  '11  have  something 
more  rare." 

"What?" 

"A  great  property  to  develop."  Then  he  told  his  son 
the  story  of  the  shipwreck,  and  of  those  wonderful  hours 
on  the  farther  side  of  Anvil  Rock.  Trenn  sat  and  stared. 
Mar  wished  he  would  stop  it.  It  got  on  his  nerves  at  last, 
those  round,  brown  eyes,  keen,  a  little  hard,  fixed  in  that 
wide,  unwinking  gaze. 

* '  So  that  's  why  I  say  let  the  cattle  business  go.  Take 
the  small  salary  that  Wilks  &  Simpson  offer,  study  prac 
tical  mining,  and  wait  for  your  chance.  In  any  case,  by 
the  time  Harry  's  left  the  High  School  you  '11  have  some 
valuable  experience  to  bring  into  the  partnership." 

Trenn  got  up  and  crossed  the  room. 

' '  Yes,  that  's  the  place, ' '  said  Mar,  excitedly,  thinking 
the  boy's  goal  was  the  brown  and  faded  reconnaissance 
map.  But  Trenn  walked  straight  past  it  to  the  window, 
and  stood  looking  out,  to  where  the  duck-pond  used  to  be, 
and  where  now  a  row  of  pretentious  little  pseudo-Span 
ish  "villas"  shut  out  the  prospect.  And  still  he  did  n't 
speak. 

"What  I  consider  so  important,  is  not  the  practical 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  65 

knowledge  per  se,  though  I  think  it  a  very  real  value. 
Not  that  so  much,  as  the  fact  that  through  associating 
yourself  with  that  kind  of  enterprise  you  are  brought 
into  relation  with  just  the  men  you  '11  need  to  know.  If 
I  had  n  't  gone  to  Rock  Hill  I  would  never  have  met  Gal- 
braith.  The  longer  I  live,  the  more  I  realize  it  's  through 
people— through  having  the  right  sort  of  human  rela 
tionships,  that  work  is  best  forwarded.  Here  have  I  lived 
for  nearly  twenty  years  with  a  secret  worth  millions,  and 
for  lack  of  knowing  the  right  men—' 

' '  "Why  did  you  never  tell  Charlie  Trennor  ? ' '  the  boy 
turned  round  to  ask. 

' '  Oh,  Charlie  Trennor !  He  's  not  the  sort.  But,  as  a 
matter  of  fact,  I  did  once  mention  the  circumstance  to 
the  Trennors.  Many  years  ago.  But  they  are  men 
who"— Mar  stumbled— "they  '11  never  do  anything  very 
big ;  they  neither  one  of  them  have  a  scintilla  of  imagina 
tion. "  And  then,  in  sheer  excitement,  speaking  his 
mind  for  once :  ' '  There  never  was  a  Trennor  who  had. ' ' 

"I  expect,"  said  the  boy,  doggedly,  "there  's  a  cer 
tain  amount  of  Trennor  about  me.  I  never  noticed  that 
/  had  any  imagination  to  speak  of. ' ' 

Mar  was  conscious  that  his  own  spirit  was  contracting 
in  a  creeping  chill.  But  he  said  to  himself  it  was  only 
because  he  had  made  the  mistake  of  criticizing  his  wife 
(by  implication)  before  her  son.  It  was  right  and 
proper  that  Trenn,  on  such  an  occasion,  should  range 
himself  on  the  side  of  his  mother's  family.  Mar's  con 
ception  of  loyalty  commonly  protected  him  from  appear 
ing  to  pass  adverse  judgment  on  the  Trennors.  But  he 
was  excited  and  overwrought  to-day.  He,  not  Trenn. 
All  through  the.  story,  that  for  Mar  was  of  such  palpi- 


66  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

tating  importance,  this  well-groomed  youth  had  kept 
himself  so  well  in  hand,  that  his  father,  looking  at  the 
' '  correct, ' '  cool  face,  had  somewhat  modified  the  present 
ment  of  the  narrative,  had  cut  description,  emotion,  won 
der,  and  come  to  Hecuba  as  quickly  as  might  be.  And 
yet  now  that,  with  as  business-like  an  air  as  he  could 
muster,  he  had  revealed  his  great  secret— handed  over 
the  long-treasured  legacy— something  still  in  the  judicial 
young  face  that  gave  the  older  man  a  sensation  of  acute 
self-consciousness,  made  him  in  some  inexplicable  man 
ner  feel  " cheap." 

But  he  would  conquer  the  ridiculous  inclination. 

It  was  for  Mar  an  hour  of  tremendous  significance. 
He  had  been  waiting  for  it  for  eighteen  years.  "After 
all,"  he  said,  making  a  fresh  start,  "you  don't  need 
imagination  in  this  case.  You  need  only  to  use  your 
eyes—" 

Trenn  lifted  his,  and  the  use  he  made  of  them  was  to 
look  at  his  father.  Did  n't  say  a  single  word.  Just 
looked  at  the  heavily-lined  face  a  moment  and  then  al 
lowed  his  clear,  brown  eyes  to  drop  till  they  rested  on  the 
toes  of  his  own  immaculate  boots. 

Hardly  more  than  three  seconds  between  the  raising 
and  the  lowering  of  the  eyes.  Not  a  sound  in  the  room. 
And  yet  between  the  meeting  of  that  look  and  the  losing 
of  it,  Nathaniel  Mar  passed  through  the  most  painful 
crisis  of  a  life  made  well  acquainted  with  pain. 

There  is  a  special  sting  in  the  skepticism  of  the  young. 
They  should  be  full  of  faith,  inclined  even  to  credulity. 
Fit  task  for  their  elders,  the  checking  of  too  generous  ar 
dor.  But  for  the  elder  to  detect  the  junior  in  thinking 
him  foolishly  enthusiastic,  childishly  gullible— there  is, 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  67 

in  that  conjuncture,  something  to  the  older  mind  quite 
specially  wounding.  It  passes  the  limit  of  mere  personal 
humiliation.  It  takes  on  the  air  of  an  affront  against  the 
seemliness  of  nature.  The  elder  has  betrayed  his  class 
and  kind— has  laid  open  to  callow  derision  the  dignity  of 
the  riper  years. 

Mar  waited.  And  little  as  he  looked  like  it  he  was 
praying.  "Oh,  my  boy,  believe  me!  Have  faith  that 
what  I  say  is  so.  And  then  I  '11  have  faith  that  all  the 
loss  will  be  won  back,  through  you,  Trenn.  I  '11  take 
heart  again.  It  all  depends  on  you.  We  '11  do  great 
things  together,  Trenn— you  and  I— oh,  believe,  be 
lieve!" 

But  Trennor  Mar  sat  there  on  the  narrow  ledge  of  the 
window-sill  absolutely  silent,  with  his  brown  eyes  on  his 
shining  boots. 

' '  I  was  wrong, ' '  said  his  father,  humbly.  ' '  I  have  put 
you  off  the  track  by  using  the  word  imagination.  It  has 
no  place  here.  I  speak  to  you  of  fact. ' ' 

Trenn  got  up  with  the  brisk  air  of  one  who  remembers 
he  has  business  to  transact,  then  pausing  for  a  moment 
with  an  eye  flown  already  to  find  his  hat,  "I  might,"  he 
said  obligingly,  "I  might  try  to  get  up  there  some  vaca 
tion,  and  have  a  look  round. ' ' 

He  "might."  He  might  try.  During  some  idle  inter 
val  in  the  real  business  of  life.  Once  on  the  spot  he 
would  condescend  to  "look  round." 

Even  his  own  son  could  not  take  the  thing  seriously. 

Well,  it  began  to  look  as  if,  after  all,  they  might  be 
right— his  wife,  Charlie  and  Harrington  Trennor,  Elihu 
Cox,  and  now  Trenn.  Mar,  the  man  who  believed  he  had 
a  gold  mine  in  the  arctic  regions,  was  a  sort  of  harmless 


68  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

monomaniac.  Sitting  there  in  a  sudden  darkness  that 
was  dashed  with  self -derision  (much  was  clear  in  those 
scorching  flashes),  Nathaniel  Mar  met  the  grim  moment 
when  to  his  own  mind  he  first  admitted  doubt. 

Groping  by  and  by  for  comfort,  he  touched  the  heart 
of  sorrow  with  *  *  Nothing  like  this  can  ever  happen  to  me 
again." 

It  was  true.  In  that  hour  something  precious  went 
out  of  his  life.  No  one,  not  even  Trenn,  had  any  idea 
what  had  happened.  But  every  one  saw  that  Nathaniel 
Mar  was  changed. 

TRENN  went  to  work  on  Karl  Siegel's  ranch,  and  Harry 
presently  announced  that  he  meant  to  join  him.  No,  he 
was  n't  going  to  finish  at  the  High  School.  Trenn  had 
an  opportunity  to  go  in  with  Siegel  on  a  new  deal,  and 
Harry  could  be  made  use  of,  too,  if  he  came  now.  Such 
an  opportunity  might  never  repeat  itself.  Mrs.  Mar  was 
of  the  same  opinion  as  the  boys,  and  Harry  was  in  tow 
ering  good  spirits. 

His  father  wondered  dully.  Ought  he  not  give  his 
younger  son  the  same  chance  he  'd  given  the  elder,  even 
if,  like  Trenn,  Harry  should  fail  utterly  to  see  how  great 
it  was  ? 

Mar  shrank  from  a  second  ordeal,  and  yet  he  knew 
that,  vaguely  enough,  he  had  been  depending  on  Harry's 
helping  him  to  bear  Trenn 's  indifference  and  unbelief. 
Had  he  not  for  a  year  now,  in  any  lighter  hour,  invari 
ably  said  to  himself:  "After  all,  I  have  two  boys.  Per 
haps  Harry  will  be  the  one"— yes,  he  must  tell  Harry,  or 
the  boy  might  reproach  him  in  time  to  come. 

Trenn 's  letter  had  arrived  in  the  morning.     All  day 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  69 

Mar  revolved  in  his  head  how  he  would  present  this  other 
"opening"  so  that  Harry —  In  the  end  he  resolved  to 
take  the  papers  out  of  the  safe,  and  simply  turn  them 
over  to  his  son,  as  though  the  father  were  no  longer  there 
to  give  the  story  tongue.  Mar  took  the  precious  packet 
home  with  him  the  same  afternoon.  Harry  was  out. 
That  evening  he  was  late  for  supper,  and  he  came  in  full 
of  the  outfit  he  'd  been  buying. 

' '  Buying  an  outfit  already  ! "  his  father  exclaimed. 

' '  Of  course !    I  don 't  mean  to  let  the  grass  grow — ' ' 

"Nor  Trenn,  apparently.  I  had  n't  heard  that  he  was 
financing  you. ' ' 

"He  is  n't.  I  had  a  little  saved  up,  and  mother  gave 
me  the  rest. ' ' 

Mar  stared  through  his  spectacles,  and  met  the  bright 
roving  eyes  of  the  lady. 

"You  gave  him  the  rest!  How  were  you  able  to  do 
that?" 

"Oh,  I  have  a  pittance  in  the  City  Bank." 

The  rival  concern.  Even  Hildegarde  gaped  with  aston 
ishment  at  this  revelation.  Mrs.  Mar  had  not  trusted  any 
one  to  know  of  this  nest-egg — savings  out  of  the  "house 
money,"  the  inadequacy  of  which  had  been  so  often 
deplored.  She  seemed  to  be  torn  now  between  regret 
that  its  existence  should  have  been  revealed,  and 
pride  that  she  had  wrung  it  out  of  conditions  so  un 
promising. 

"Yes,"  she  said,  with  a  spark  of  anger  in  her  eye, 
"and  you  '11  be  kind  enough,  Nathaniel,  not  to  break 
your  arm,  or  get  yourself  disabled  in  any  way,  for 
there  's  nothing  left  now  for  a  rainy  day.  Unless  you 
have  looked  ahead  as  I  Ve  struggled  to—" 


70  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

He  knew  that  she  knew  he  had  not 
her  sense  of  laying  by  a  secret  hoard,  but  the  form  of  her 
mandate  pricked  him. 

He  glanced  at  the  desk  for  comfort.  He  had,  after  all, 
"looked  ahead"  in  another  fashion— as  Harry  would  see. 
But— again  he  fell  back  before  the  check  of  an  outfit  al 
ready  bought  for  another  purpose.  And  Harry  was  talk 
ing  all  the  time  that  he  was  eating— telling  his  mother 
about  his  prospects  and  about  the  letter  he  had  written 
in  answer  to  Trenn  's. 

Already  he  had  written!  Without  an  hour's  hesita 
tion,  or  an  instant's  consultation  with  his  natural  ad 
viser.  Ah,  no,  his  true  * '  natural  adviser ' '  had  obviously 
been  invoked,  and  had  responded  by  offering  him  the 
sinews  of  war.  Mar,  looking  down  into  his  plate,  or  for 
occasional  refreshment  of  the  spirit  into  Hildegarde's 
soft,  young  face,  was  nevertheless  intensely  conscious  of 
the  vivid  alert  personality  at  the  other  end  of  the  table. 
His  wife  was,  as  usual,  not  content  to  contemplate  with 
idle  tranquillity  the  fruit  of  some  achievement  in  the 
past.  Strange  contrast  to  her  daughter's  faculty  for  ex 
treme  stillness,  Mrs.  Mar  presented  the  stirring  spectacle 
of  a  person  who  was  always  "getting  something  done," 
and  commonly  getting  a  number  of  things  done  at  once. 
If  it  was  only  while  the  plates  were  being  changed,  she 
would  pull  out  of  the  yellow  bag  suspended  at  her  belt,  a 
postcard,  and  with  an  inch  length  of  pencil  would  briskly 
write  an  order  to  some  tradesman,  or  she  would  jump  up 
to  straighten  a  picture  or  set  the  clock  on  three  minutes, 
or  "catch  any  odd  job  on  the  fly,"  as  Trenn  used  dis 
respectfully  to  say  in  private.  Even  on  this  important 
and  exciting  occasion,  she  was  not  content  merely  to  eat 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  71 

her  supper,  listen  to  Harry's  outpouring,  and  throw  in 
shrewd  responses  from  time  to  time. 

Her  handsome  features  wore  that  look  of  animation  the 
spectacle  of  "getting  on"  ever  inspired  in  the  lady,  her 
eyes  glittered  like  pieces  of  highly  polished,  brown  onyx, 
and  while  she  put  food  into  her  mouth  with  the  right 
hand,  the  left,  by  a  common  practice,  executed  five-finger 
exercises  up  and  down  the  cloth,  between  her  plate  and 
the  end  of  the  table.  But  to-night  she  broke  into  a  fan 
tasia—the  pliant  little  finger  curled  and  tossed  its  tip  in 
air,  playing  a  soundless  paeon  to  celebrate  Harry's  en 
trance  into  the  business  of  life. 

For  Mar,  in  circumstances  like  these,  to  hold  wide  a 
different  door— had  there  ever  been  a  moment  less  pro 
pitious  ? 

"You  ought  to  have  shown  me  the  letter  before  you 
sent  it  off, ' '  he  said. 

"I  would,  only  I  knew  you  'd  think  I  ought  to  catch 
the  afternoon  mail.  There  was  barely  time.  And  the 
letter  was  all  right— I  'm  sure  it  was.  I  told  Trenn 
either  he  or  Siegel  had  got  to  pay  me  from  the  start.  I 
don't  ask  much,  I  said,  but  I  'm  worth  something  if  I 
am  a  raw  hand.  I  wrote  the  sort  of  letter  Trenn  can 
show  to  Siegel.  I  piled  it  on  about  the  interruption  to 
my  studies,  and  about  father's  preferring  me  to  stick  at 
books  a  year  or  two  more. ' ' 

"It  was  ingenious  of  you  to  discover  that  fact,"  said 
Mar,  quietly. 

"Oh,  they  must  n't  think  I  'm  too  keen,  you  know." 

Mrs.  Mar  nodded  as  she  wound  up  her  silent  accom 
paniment  with  a  chord.  But  if  she  followed  the  implied 
course  of  reasoning,  not  so  the  boy's  father. 


72  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"If  you  Ve  written  in  that  vein,"  said  Mar,  slowly, 
"it  seems  to  me  still  more  premature  to  have  ordered 
your  outfit. ' ' 

"Oh,  that  's  all  O.K.,"  said  Harry,  genially  conde 
scending  to  soothe  his  father's  fears.  "Of  course  I  'm 
going.  Trenn  '11  understand.  He  's  got  a  long  head,  old 
Trenn  has!"— and  he  exchanged  secure  smiles  with  his 
mother— "I  had  to  write  as  I  did,  don't  you  see"— again 
Harry  obligingly  reduced  his  tactics  to  simpler  terms  to 
meet  the  slower  comprehension  of  his  father— "just  to 
make  Siegel  understand  he  need  n  't  expect  to  get  me  for 
nothing.  I  'm  not  coming  in  on  the  'little  brother 
racket. '  No,  sir !  Old  Siegel  's  got  to  pay  me  something 
from  the  start,  or  how  can  I  be  supposed  to  know  it  's  a 
good  thing?  Siegel's  got  to  show  me!  I  'm  from  Mis 
souri."  He  made  the  boast  with  his  pleasant  boyish 
laugh,  pushed  back  his  chair,  and  walked  about,  hands  in 
pockets,  head  in  air,  describing  to  his  mother  how  fellows 
often  did  better  to  take  their  pay  in  cattle,  and  little  by 
little  get  their  own  herd,  and  little  by  little  get  land. 
Often  they  ended  by  buying  out  those  other  fellows  who 
started  with  capital.  She  would  see!  He  and  Trenn 
were  n 't  going  to  take  anything  on  trust.  ' '  They  '11  find 
they  Ve  got  to  show  us, ' '  he  said,  squaring  himself  before 
a  lot  of  imaginary  Siegels.  ' '  We  're  from  Missouri ! ' ' 

Mar,  sitting  silently  by,  rose  upon  that  word,  and  tied 
up  the  loose  papers  that  he  had  laid  out  on  his  writing- 
table.  He  returned  them  to  the  office  bag,  finding  him 
self  arrived  at  wondering  what  he  had  better  say  if  the 
day  ever  came  when  Harry  should  reproach  his  father 
for  not  telling  him  about— 

But  Mar  was  borrowing  trouble. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  73 

Trenn  had  already  told  him. 

And  they  had  laughed  together.  "Is  n't  it  just  like 
him ! ' '  Harry  had  said,  and  slapped  his  knee  as  one  who 
makes  a  shrewd  observation. 

AFTER  all  there  was  a  kind  of  rough  justice  in  it.  It  had 
been  Galbraith  who  had  made  it  possible  for  Mar  to  go 
to  Alaska.  It  was  fitting  that  it  should  be  his  son  who 
should  share  in  the  benefits. 

Mar  spent  part  of  the  following  Saturday  afternoon  in 
drafting  a  letter  to  the  son  of  his  long  dead  friend.  He 
took  uncommon  pains  with  it  and  he  copied  it  several 
times.  It  had  no  need  to  be  long,  for  Jack  would  remem 
ber  the  story.  He  could  not,  of  course,  be  expected  to  in 
terrupt  those  postgraduate  studies,  whatever  they  were 
precisely— studies  which  twice  already  had  been  dropped, 
as  Mar  supposed,  while  Mr.  Jack  went  cruising  about  the 
world  in  his  steam-yacht.  But  in  the  nature  of  things  the 
completion  of  his  preparation  for  the  business  of  life  must 
be  near  at  hand,  for  young  Galbraith,  the  most  energetic 
and  ambitious  of  men,  was  in  his  twenty-fourth  year. 
Never  was  such  a  glutton  for  work  before.  Even  when  he 
went  off  pleasuring  in  his  yacht,  he  went  to  places  not  re 
nowned  for  recreation,  and  his  boon  companions  were 
geographers  and  biologists  and  such-like  gay  dogs. 

He  might,  at  all  events,  without  prejudice  to  these  final 
studies,  begin  to  lay  plans  either  for  going  himself  to 
Alaska  presently,  or  for  sending  some  one  else.  The  best 
course  would  be  for  him  to  come  at  once  to  Valdivia  to 
see  his  old  friend,  and  to  talk  things  over.  Mar  thought 
it  advisable  to  enclose  in  his  letter  a  sketch  of  the  most 
interesting  section  of  the  Alaskan  coast.  He  could  have 


74  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

drawn  it  with  his  eyes  shut,  now,  but  he  got  up,  hobbled 
round  the  desk,  and  took  down  the  reconnaissance  map 
from  between  the  pictures  of  his  father  and  mother.  At 
the  same  moment,  and  while  he  was  in  the  act,  Mrs.  Mar 
came  in,  with  that  air,  especially  her  own,  of  one  arriving 
in  the  nick  of  time  to  save  the  country.  Her  errand, 
however,  was  the  one  Saturday  afternoon  invariably 
brought,  the  conveying  here  of  the  week's  mending  for 
Hildegarde  's  attention ;  the  fastening  of  the  book-rest  on 
the  table's  edge,  the  propping  up  of  some  volume  in  the 
French  or  German  tongue,  and  the  laying  ready  at  one 
side  of  a  stump  of  lead-pencil  for  the  marking  of  preg 
nant  passages.  In  front  of  these  Mrs.  Mar  would  estab 
lish  herself  in  the  rocking-chair,  with  her  knitting,  or 
crochet,  or  some  other  form  of  occupation  not  requiring 
eyes. 

' '  Hildegarde !    Hildegarde ! ' ' 

"Yes,  mama,"  came  in  through  the  open  window  from 
the  garden. 

"I  'm  ready!"  When  was  n't  Mrs.  Mar  "ready!" 
But  she  announced  the  fact  with  a  flourish  of  knitting- 
needle,  as  she  rocked  back  and  forth  and  scrutinized  her 
husband.  "I  'm  glad,"  she  said,  briskly,  "to  see  you  tak 
ing  down  that  old  eye-sore."  Her  eyes  pecked  at  the 
faded  map.  "It  's  high  time  it  was  thrown  away. ' ' 

Her  husband  paused  in  his  halting  progress  back  to 
the  writing-table.  '  *  Time  it  was  thrown  away  ? ' ' 

' '  Yes.    Is  n  't  that  what  you  Ve  got  it  down  f or  ? " 

"No." 

1 '  What  are  you  going  to  do  with  it,  then  ? ' ' 

Mar  seemed  not  to  hear.  He  turned  his  back  on  the 
rocking-chair,  and  propped  the  map  up  in  front  of  him, 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  75 

against  the  mucilage  pot,  very  much  as  his  wife  had 
propped  Eckermann  for  his  regular  Saturday  conversa 
tion  with  Goethe. 

But  Mrs.  Mar  was  never  inclined  to  let  her  observa 
tions  go  by  ignored.  ' '  I  can  hardly  suppose  you  want  to 
have  it  lumbering  up  the  place  here  any  longer. "  As 
still  he  took  no  notice,  "It  certainly  is  n't  decorative." 
A  pause  long  enough  for  him  to  defend  it,  if  he  'd  been 
going  to.  "Perhaps  you  '11  tell  me  what  's  the  good  of 
keeping  it. ' ' 

"Perhaps  you  '11  tell  me  what  's  the  harm." 

She  could,  easily,  but  she  forbore. 

She  only  agitated  the  rocking-chair  yet  more  violently, 
clashed  her  knitting-needles  as  she  turned  the  stocking  in 
her  quick,  competent  hands,  and  with  a  glance  at  the 
clock  said  briskly,  as  the  door  opened : ' '  Come,  come,  Hil- 
degarde.  You  're  nearly  three  minutes  behind  time. ' ' 

The  girl  carried  her  bowl  of  roses  over  to  her  father's 
open  window,  and  set  it  carefully  down.  Hildegarde  was 
the  one  person  in  the  world  Mrs.  Mar  never  seemed  to 
fluster.  As  the  girl's  eye  fell  on  the  big  envelop  ad 
dressed  in  Mar 's  bold  writing,  "  Oh ! "  she  said,  pausing, 
' '  have  you  been  hearing  again  ? ' ' 

'  *  Hearing  what  f ' '  came  sharply  from  the  swaying  fig 
ure  on  the  other  side  of  the  room. 

"You  '11  read  it  to  me  after  we  've  done  our  German, 
won't  you?"  whispered  the  girl,  caressingly,  as  she 
leaned  a  moment  on  the  back  of  Mar's  chair. 

* '  Read  it  to  you  ?  Why  should  I  ? "  he  said,  nervously, 
as  he  laid  a  piece  of  blotting-paper  over  his  letter. 

"You  always  do,"  she  pleaded.  But  if  Mr.  Mar  im 
agined  that  his  daughter  was  begging  to  hear  the  letter 


76  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

he  himself  had  just  written,  Mrs.  Mar  made  no  such  mis 
take.  She  was  well  aware  whose  communications  had 
power  to  stir  the  *  *  stolid ' '  Hildegarde. 

"You  never  told  me,"  the  lady  arraigned  her  hus 
band's  back,  "that  you  'd  been  hearing  again  from 
young  Galbraith." 

Hildegarde,  under  the  electric  shock  of  the  spoken 
name,  seemed  to  feel  called  upon  to  make  some  show  of 
indifference.  She  inspected  the  pile  of  mending  with  an 
air  of  complete  absorption  in  the  extent  of  the  damage. 
Her  mother  was  saying:  "I  have  n't  heard  anything 
about  that  gentleman"— (oh,  wealth  of  ironic  condem 
nation  the  accomplished  speaker  could  throw  into  the  in 
nocent  words  "that  gentleman !")  —"not  since  the  letter 
he  wrote  from  the  barbarous  place  you  did  n't  know  how 
to  pronounce,  and  could  n't  so  much  as  find  on  the 
map!" 

' '  Have  n  't  you  ? ' '  said  her  husband.  ' '  Well,  you  soon 
may." 

The  girl 's  lowered  eyelids  fluttered,  but  the  prospect  of 
soon  hearing  something  on  this  theme  left  Mrs.  Mar  col 
lected  enough  to  say :  "  No  earthly  use  to  darn  that. ' ' 

' '  N-no, ' '  agreed  the  girl. 

"Lay  a  piece  under.  Match  the  stripe  and  cut  out  the 
fray.  There  's  some  like  it  in  the  ottoman. ' ' 

Hildegarde  went  and  kneeled  down  before  the  big  deal 
"store-box."  Its  lid,  stuffed  and  neatly  covered,  made  a 
sightly  receptacle  for  endless  oddments. 

Mrs.  Mar,  as  she  clicked  her  needles  and  oscillated  her 
entire  frame,  kept  her  eye  on  the  place  where  she  was 
going  to  dash  into  Eckermann  the  instant  Hildergarde 
was  settled  to  her  sewing.  But  true  to  the  sacred  princi- 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  77 

pie  of  doing  something  while  she  was  waiting,  Mrs.  Mar 
thus  delayed,  saw  it  to  be  a  timely  moment  to  put  Jack 
Galbraith  in  his  proper  place.  It  was  not  the  sort  of 
thing  you  could  do  thoroughly  once,  and  be  done  with. 
Like  house-cleaning,  it  required  to  be  seen  to  periodically. 
"Well,  what  's  the  epoche-machende  news  this  time?" 
As  her  husband  made  no  haste  to  answer,  "He  's  always 
'going  to  break  the  record,'  that  young  gentleman!  I 
never  knew  anybody  with  so  many  big  words  in  his 
mouth. ' ' 

The  stricture  was  deserved  enough  to  gall  Jack's 
friend,  who  moved  uneasily  in  his  revolving  chair.  But 
he  kept  his  eyes  on  the  map  he  was  drawing  and  he  kept 
his  lips  close  shut. 

"I  see  precious  little  result  so  far,"  she  was  beginning 
again. 

"The  result,"  interrupted  Mar,  "will  be  judged  when 
he  's  finished  his  life-work,  not  while  he  's  still  preparing 
for  it." 

' '  Preparing !  Bless  me,  is  n  't  he  old  enough  to  have 
done  something,  if  he  was  ever  going  to  ? " 

"If  he  were  going  into  business,  yes.  Science  is  a 
longer  story." 

"One  excuse  is  as  good  as  another,  I  suppose,  when  a 
man  wants  to  please  himself.  It  's  like  Galbraith  to  call 
his  fecklessness  by  a  highfalutin  name.  'Science,'  'In 
vestigation,'  'Anthropology.'  Humph !  But  it  does  sound 
better,  I  agree,  than  saying  he  likes  satisfying  a  low  curi 
osity  about  savages.  It  is  n't  even  as  if  he  wanted  to 
convert  them.  Not  he !  Likes  them  best  as  they  are :  fil 
thy  and  degraded.  '  Philology  ? '  Tomf oolology  ! ' ' 

It  was  more  even  than  the  tranquil  Hildegarde  could 


78  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

bear.  "Has  n't  he  done  something  wonderful  about 
ocean  currents,  papa ?  Did  n't  you  say  that  was  the  real 
reason  why  he  went  that  last  time  to—  ?" 

Yes.    It  was  a  piece  of  work  that  brought  him  recog 
nition  very  creditable  to  so  young  a  student. ' ' 

"Whose  recognition?"  Not  hers,  the  critic  of  the  rock 
ing-chair  seemed  to  say.  But  Mar  took  no  notice.  ' '  And 
where  's  that  book  he  was  boasting  about  six  months  ago  ? 
The  one  that  was  going  to  shed  such  valuable  new  light 
on  the— the— Jugginses  of  No  Man's  Land.  So  far  as  I 
can  see  by  the  feeble  light  of  the  female  intellect,  the 
Jugginses  still  sit  in  the  dark.  Have  n  't  you  found  that 
roll  of  seersucker  yet,  Hildegarde?  Upon  my  soul!"— 
faster  flew  the  needles,  harder  rocked  the  chair— "com 
pared  with  you  a  snail  is  a  cross  between  an  acrobat  and 
a  hurricane. ' ' 

The  girl  only  laughed.  "Here  's  the  horrid  stripey 
stuff,  hiding  at  .the  very  bottom!"  She  laid  the  roll 
aside,  and  with  a  neat  precision  proceeded  to  put  back  all 
the  things  she  had  taken  out,  for  Hildegarde  knew,  if  not 
properly  packed,  the  ottoman  would  overflow. 

"Now,  make  haste,"  urged  her  mother,  "if  anything 
so  alien  is  possible  to  you.  I  'm  certainly  not  going  to 
read  to  you  while  you  're  fussing  about  on  the  other  side 
of  the  room. ' '  Then,  not  deterred  in  her  unswerving  at 
tempt  to  improve  the  shining  hour,  Mrs.  Mar  flung  a 
quick  look  at  the  bent  back  of  her  husband,  and  pro 
ceeded  to  put  in  the  time  in  clearing  up  one  of  his  multi 
tudinous  misapprehensions. 

"What  /  can't  forgive  Jack  Galbraith  is  his  ingrati 
tude  to  you." 

Again  Mar  moved  a  little  in  his  creaking  chair,  but 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  79 

halted  this  side  speech.  Hildegarde,  busily  repacking, 
turned  her  blonde  head  toward  her  mother,  saying :  * '  In 
gratitude!  Why,  he  's  perfectly  devoted  to  papa! 
That  's  why  I  like  Mr.  Galbraith." 

' '  Devoted,  is  he  ?  Well,  he  's  got  odd  ways  of  showing  it. 
When  he  was  a  troublesome,  inquisitive  little  pest,  he  used 
to  reveal  his  devotion  by  coming  twice  every  year  to  turn 
our  house  upside  down,  and  get  our  boys  into  every  con 
ceivable  mischief.  Glad  enough  to  plant  himself  here 
then,  when  nobody  else  would  be  bothered  with  him.  But 
his  devotion  to  your  father  does  n  't  carry  him  the  length 
of  coming  to  see  him  nowadays.  Why,  it 's  fourteen  years 
since  Jack  Galbraith  darkened  these  doors,  and — 

"Well,  I  would  n't  be  surprised  if  he  were  to  darken 
them  very  soon, ' '  said  Mr.  Mar. 

"What!"  said  Mrs.  Mar,  so  surprised  she  allowed  the 
rocking-chair  to  slow  down. 

Hildegarde  stood  transfixed,  with  the  top  of  the  otto 
man  arrested,  half  shut. 

"Yes,"  said  Mr.  Mar,  steadily,  and  in  complete  good 
faith,  as  he  slipped  the  diagram  into  the  envelop.  "I  'm 
expecting  him  out  here  this  spring. ' ' 

"Jack  is  coming!"  Hildegarde  said  to  her  heart. 
"Wonderful  Jack  is  coming!  Dear  Jack!  Dear,  dear 
Jack !  Oh,  the  beautiful  world ! ' ' 

"Indeed!"  said  Mrs.  Mar,  beginning  slowly  to  rock 
again,  "and  what  's  he  coming  for  this  time?" 

"Perhaps,  as  Hildegarde  is  fantastic  enough  to  think, 
he  may  be  coming  to  see  me, ' '  Mar  answered. 

His  wife's  laugh  had  a  tang  of  shrewdness.  "You  '11 
find  he  has  business  of  some  sort  to  attend  to  in  Cali 
fornia,  if  he  does  come ! ' ' 


80  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"Just  now  you  were  complaining  that  he  did  n't  at 
tend  to  business  anywhere. ' ' 

"My  complaint— no,  my  regret—is,  that  gratitude 
is  n't  in  the  Galbraith  blood. " 

"You  have  no  good  reason  for  saying  that."  He 
spoke  with  uncommon  emphasis. 

But  Mrs.  Mar's  spirit  rose  to  meet  him.  "I  have  the 
excellent  reason  that  I  know  enough  about  the  father  as 
well  as  the  son  to  form  an  opinion.  I  don't  forget  how 
your  'greatest  friend'  died,  leaving  you  his  executor  and 
leaving  you  nothing  else.  Not  a  penny  piece  out  of  all 
that  money." 

' '  I  don 't  see  why  my  friends  should  leave  me  money— ' ' 

"No,  nor  why  you  should  get  it  any  other  way  !  Don 't 
let  me  hurry  you,  Hildegarde,  but  if  you  've  quite  fin 
ished  mooning  about  in  the  corner  there,  I  'd  like  to 
mention  that  it  's  exactly  twelve  and  a  half  minutes  since 
I  called  you  in  to  your  German,  and  there  's  the  Mis 
sionary  Society  at  half  past  four,  and  choir  practice  at 
seven,  and  before  we  can  turn  round  Mrs.  Cox  will  be 
here  about  electing  the  new  secretary  to  the  Shakspere 
Club,  and  if  I  'd  known  you  were  going  to  squander  my 
time  like  this  I  'd  have  stopped  to  make  Harry  his  last 
Washington  pie  before— 

1 1  Yes,  mama.    Now  I  'm  settled. ' ' 

Hildegarde  took  the  seat  opposite  her  mother  and 
silently  applied  the  seersucker  patch.  While  Mr.  Mar, 
behind  the  screen  of  a  much-hunched  shoulder,  copied 
with  infinite  care  the  "eye-sore"  map,  Mrs.  Mar  knitting 
all  the  while  at  lightning  speed,  rolled  out  the  German 
uninterruptedly,  till  a  ring  at  the  bell  was  followed  by 
sounds  of  Mrs.  Cox  being  shown  into  the  parlor. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  81 

Mrs.  Mar  had  known  no  one  so  well  in  Valdivia  all 
these  years  as  Mrs.  Elihu  Cox.  Mrs.  Elihu  was  consid 
ered  "a  very  bright  woman/'  and  it  was  no  doubt  so, 
since  even  Mrs.  Mar  did  not  demur  at  her  renown.  They 
met  seldom,  outside  of  church,  the  Shakspere  Club,  or  the 
Mission  Society,  yet  each  had  admitted  things  to  the 
other  that  neither  had  admitted  to  any  one  else.  Even 
to-day,  when  there  was  definite  business  to  arrange,  they 
talked  of  other  matters  than  the  vacant  secretaryship. 
They  presented  each  other  with  views  upon  domestic  ser 
vice,  education,  and  husbands. 

i  i  I  left  Mr.  Cox  supremely  happy, ' '  said  his  spouse,  in 
that  tone  of  humorous  scorn  by  which  many  women 
try  to  readjust  the  balance  between  the  sexes.  "Yes, 
supremely  happy,  clearing  out  his  desk.  He  does  it 
once  a  month.  Nothing  Mr.  Cox  does  brings  him  so  near 
absolute  bliss,  except  wandering  about  the  place  with  a 
hammer  and  nails. ' ' 

Both  women  smiled  at  the  inveterate  childishness  of 
the  lords  of  creation. 

And  then,  on  a  sudden,  Mrs.  Cox  was  grave.  One 
might  laugh  at  the  odd  ways  of  men  with  any  woman.  It 
is  the  universal  bond  that  binds  the  sex  together ;  the  fine 
lady  feels  it  no  less  when  she  condoles  with  her  washer 
woman  upon  a  stay-at-home  husband,— "Yes,  yes,  a  man 
in  the  house  all  day  is  dreadfully  in  the  way,"— and 
their  identity  of  sentiment  bridges  the  difference  in  for 
tune.  But  Mrs.  Mar  was  one  with  whom  you  might  not 
only  laugh  over  the  foibles  of  the  opposite  sex,  you  might 
even  be  grave  with  her  on  the  same  ground — a  rarer  priv 
ilege  to  the  educated  woman. 

1  ( That  monthly  orgy,  that  's  such  unalloyed  delight  to 


82  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

Mr.  Cox,  used  to  be  a  time  of  great  interest  to  me,  too," 
admitted  Mrs.  Cox. 

"  Really !"  The  president  of  the  Valdivia  Shakspere 
Society  could  hardly  believe  it  of  her  friend. 

' '  Yes.  You  see,  there  's  always  a  great  clearance  made 
—a  general  getting  rid  of  all  sorts  of  accumulations.  I 
used  to  watch  every  time  when  he  came  to  the  lower  left- 
hand  drawer — :  Mrs.  Cox  smiled  faintly  as  one  pitiful 
of  some  long-past  pain. 

"Well,  what  was  the  matter  with  the  lower  left-hand 
drawer  ? ' ' 

' '  That  was  where  he  kept  a  faded  photograph  of  Ellie 
Brezee.  I  used  to  watch  to  see  if  that  time  he  was  going 
to  throw  it  away.  He  never  did. ' ' 

"Who  was  Ellie  Brezee?" 

"A  sister  of  Colonel  George  Brezee — the  one  that  died. 
That  was  before  you  came  to  California.  Mr.  Cox  was 
engaged  to  Ellie  when  he  was  nineteen.  But,  thank  good 
ness,  my  concern  about  it  is  among  the  things  that  I  'm 
done  with.  I  don 't  any  longer  sit  at  home,  now,  with  the 
tail  of  my  eye  on  the  lower  left-hand  drawer  while  Ellie 
Brezee  comes  out  for  her  monthly  airing. ' ' 

"Oh,  you  disposed  of  Ellie?" 

"No,  oh,  no." 

"He  finally  threw  the  picture  away  himself?" 

' '  No.    Only  now,  I  know  he  never  will. ' ' 

They  were  silent  a  moment.  "I  never  said  anything, 
of  course;  and  he  never  made  any  secret  about  it.  I 
did  n't  think  it  any  disloyalty  to  me  that  he  should  keep 
it.  At  the  same  time"— she  dropped  her  voice— "the 
pain  the  sight  of  that  faded  face  was  to  me  for  years— 
you  think  it  supremely  silly,  I  suppose.  But  then  your 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  83 

husband  does  n't  hoard  up  the  memory  of  some  girl 
that  's  been  dead  and  buried  for  twenty  years,  so  you 
can 't  understand. ' ' 

"Yes,  I  can  understand,"  Mrs.  Mar  answered,  with  an 
eye  that  saw  through  the  wall  the  reconnaissance  map  of 
Norton  Sound. 


CHAPTER  V 

;ACK  GALBRAITH  replied  to  Mr.  Mar's  let 
ter  by  return  of  post.    He  apologized  for  not 
writing  more  at  length,  but  he  was  up  to  his 
eyes   in   proof-correcting.     He   was   seeing 
through  the  press— "  Yes,  yes,  but  all  that 
was  singularly  irrelevant") -book  about  his  experiences 
( ' < Hum !  hum ! " ) ,  " extreme  northern  Siberia. "   ("Sibe 
ria,  forsooth!")  ;  no  white  man  had  ever  been  there  be 
fore.     ("  And  to  think  he  might  have  spent  that  time  in 
Alaska!")     He  was  "making  a  genuine  contribution  to 
science  "-oh,  yes,  quite  so-"  most  travelers  too  imper 
fectly  equipped."     ("He  could  n't  have  had  my  letter 
when  he  wrote  this.")     The  implication  was,  of  course, 
that  Galbraith's  own  equipment  left  nothing  to  be  de 
sired.  He  even  touched  airily  upon  his  claims  to  be  con 
sidered  geographer  as  well  as  navigator,  electrician,  ge 
ologist,  philologist,  biologist,  and  the  Lord  knows  what, 
beside     Yes,  Jack  had  a  large  way  of  envisaging  human 
endeavor,  especially  his  own.  But  certainly  their  letters 
had  crossed.     Hum!  he  had  "covered  areas  in  science 
never  before  exploited  by  a  single  man. ' '    The  result  Mar 
should  presently  see.     For  Galbraith  would  leave  word 
that  a  copy  of  the  great  work  should  be  sent  to  his  o 
friend     It  would  be  two  years  before  he  himself  could 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  85 

see  the  thing  in  book  form.  '("What  's  this?")  "Off 
again,  to  join  an  expedition!"  And  was  n't  it  strange? 
He  was  going  to  the  arctic  as  Mar  was  recommending. 
Not  precisely  to  Norton  Bay,  but  ("Then  he  had  got  the 
letter !")  "with  the  Swedish  explorer  Nordenskjold  to  see 
if  by  good  luck"  they  could  find  the  North  Pole.  And 
why  should  n't  they  "come  home  via  Norton  Bay?"  he 
asked,  with  irresponsible  arrogance,  adding,  characteristi 
cally  :  "  I  11  mention  it  to  the  Swede.  Perhaps  we  '11  crawl 
over  the  crown  of  the  world  and  coast  down  the  shore  of 
Alaska  till  we  come  up  against  your  Anvil  Rock.  If  we 
do,  I  promise  to  go  and  see  after  the  gold-mine  for  you. 
Thank  you  for  saying  I  'm  to  have  my  share— but  thank 
you  most  of  all  for  telling  me  such  a  mighty  fine  story 
when  I  was  a  kid.  It  had  a  great  deal  to  do  with  the 
shaping  of  my  ambition,  and  the  direction  of  my  multi 
farious  studies. ' ' 

AND  this  was  Galbraith  's  good-by. 

These  events  had  taken  place  nearly  two  years  before 
Bella  Wayne  began  her  meteoric  career  at  the  Valdivia 
School  for  Young  Ladies. 

If  Hildegarde  had  recovered  somewhat  from  her  dis 
appointment  at  Jack's  failure  to  visit  California,  her 
father  had  not  ceased  silently  to  lament,  and  secretly  to 
contemn  Galbraith 's  wounding  flippancy  in  his  choice  of 
a  route  to  Alaska. 

When  Madeleine  Smulsky's  family  took  her  away  to 
live  in  Wyoming,  Hildegarde  would  have  been  even  more 
desolate  but  for  her  espousal  of  Bella  Wayne 's  cause,  and 
consequent  preoccupation  with  that  not  altogether  satis 
factory  protegee. 


86  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

For  Miss  Bella  had  ' '  ways ' '  that  were  distinctly  rasp 
ing.  She  was  abominably  selfish,  and  her  big  family  of 
brothers  and  sisters  had  spoiled  her  from  the  day  she 
could  toddle. 

She  was,  besides,  the  uncomfortable  kind  of  little  girl 
in  whose  eyes  you  always  saw  reflected  whatever  was 
amiss  with  you.  You  might  have  on  a  hat  of  ravishing 
beauty,  but  if  your  belt  had  worked  up  and  your  skirt 
had  worked  down,  Bella's  glance  ignored  your  highly 
satisfactory  top  and  fastened  on  your  middle.  Not  until 
after  she  had  known  Bella  Wayne  for  some  months  did 
Hildegarde  begin  to  divine  her  own  shortcomings  in  the 
matter  of  dress.  No  gulf  of  years,  or  respect  for  high 
standing  in  the  school,  deterred  Bella  from  letting  Miss 
Mar  know  that  she  could  never,  never  wear  with  success  a 
checked  shirt-waist.  Why  not?  Because.  And  for  the 
same  excellent  reason,  Miss  Mar  must  have  her  things 
made  plainer.  No  puffing;  no  shirring.  "I  can  wear 
'  fluff  ery,'  but  you  can't.  You  're  much  too  like  an  old 
goddess  or  Boadicea,  or  some  whacking  person  like  that, ' ' 
which  was  tepid  and  discreet  in  comparison  with  many 
of  her  deliverances.  She  would  ask  you  a  highly  incon 
venient  question  as  soon  as  wink,  and  her  own  frankness 
was  a  thing  to  make  you  cold  down  your  back.  An  eye 
that  nothing  escaped,  the  keenest  of  little  noses  for  a  se 
cret,  a  ruthless  finger  for  any  sensitive  spot— that  was 
Bella  Wayne  at  twelve.  It  was  the  second  time  that  she 
was  being  so  kindly  helped  by  Miss  Hildegarde,  and  yet 
more  than  at  the  reduction  of  "those  disgusting  frac 
tions"  Bella  looked  at  her  new  friend,  bent  so  low  over 
the  slate  that  her  sole  ornament,  a  silver  locket,  swung 
against  the  dado  of  dragons,  without  whose  scaly  support 


COMB  AND  FIND  ME  87 

Bella  could  never  hope  to  bring  her  mind  down  to  math 
ematics  for  a  moment.  She  reflected  that  she  had  never 
seen  Miss  Mar  without  that  locket.  Was  there  anything 
inside  it  ?  Her  fingers  itched  to  open  it  and  see.  It  was 
suspended  round  the  smooth  neck  on  a  narrow  velvet  rib 
bon.  Bella,  supposed  to  be  following  the  course  of  rea 
soning  by  which  it  was  to  be  demonstrated  that  "since 
100  pounds  of  coal  cost  $0.33  per  hundredweight,  385 
pounds  (which  are  equal  to  3.85  times  100  pounds)  will 
cost  3.85  times  $0.33,"  she  was  in  reality  making  mental 
calculation  of  a  quite  different  character,  as  she  studied 
the  little  black  velvet  bowknot  that  rested  on  the  milk- 
white  nape  of  Miss  Mar's  neck,  just  underneath  a  flaxen 
ring  of  hair.  One  end  of  the  bow  was  longer  than  the 
other. 

"Five  times  three  are  fifteen.  Five  and  carry  one- 
see,  Bella?" 

"Yes."  What  Bella  saw,  with  that  look  of  luminous 
intelligence,  was  that  the  silver  locket  was  sliding  into 
Miss  Mar's  lap. 

"Eight  times  three— oh!"  But  before  Hildegarde 
could  close  her  fingers  on  the  fallen  trinket,  Bella  had 
snatched  it  up  and  carried  it  away  behind  the*syringas. 

' '  Give  me  back  my  locket ! ' '  called  Hildegarde.  ' '  Give 
it  back  this  minute ! ' ' 

Bella  made  off  to  a  remoter  fastness.  Hildegarde 
pursued  her.  But  Hildegarde  never  could  catch  any 
body,  and  Bella  was  already  the  champion  runner  of  the 
school.  "Bella,  I  never  show  that  to  anybody.  I  won't 
forgive  you  if  you  open  it. ' ' 

"Oh,  I  must  see  why  you  say  that!"  Bella  stopped 
and  tried  the  fastening.  Hildegarde  rushed  at  her,  but 


COME  AND  FIND  ME 

Bella  fled  at  each  approach.  At  last  the  big  girl  stopped 
breathless,  and  tried  moral  suasion.  The  little  girl  only 
laughed,  and  standing  just  out  of  reach  had  the  effron 
tery  to  open  the  locket  and  make  unseemly  comment  upon 
what  she  found  within. 

"My  gracious!  Is  n't  he  a  sweet?  Where  does  he 
live  ?  Does  he  go  to  church  ?  I  'm  sure  I  've  never  seen 
this  bee-yew-tiful  young  man  before.  Girls,  do  you  want 
to  look  at  Miss  Mar's  sweetheart.  Come  and  see  this  dar 
ling  duck ! ' '  She  summoned  the  laughing  group  that  had 
been  looking  on. 

But  Bella  only  pretended  to  show  them.  Every  time 
anybody  came  near,  she  covered  the  face  with  her  thumb. 
But  Hildegarde,  lacking  the  small  satisfaction  of  know 
ing  that,  worn  out  with  the  race  and  scarlet  with  indig 
nation,  breathless,  outraged,  pursued  the  fleet  little  vil 
lain  from  group  to  group,  and  after  the  bell  rang,  from 
garden  to  hall.  In  vain. 

When  Bella  appeared  at  the  breaking  up  of  school  that 
day,  and  restored  the  locket,  Miss  Mar  received  it  in  a 
lofty  silence,  refusing  even  to  look  at  a  little  girl  so  ill- 
mannered  and  ungrateful. 

But  the  next  day  Bella,  much  subdued  by  one  of  her 
recurrent  attacks  of  homesickness,  red-eyed,  a  little 
pinched-looking  and  woebegone,  begged  pardon  so  pret 
tily,  that  Miss  Mar's  heart  was  melted. 

"And  I  did  n't  really  show  it  to  the  others.  Ask 
anybody.  I  would  n't  do  that.  Oh,  no !"  And  then  be 
traying  the  true  ground  of  this  pious  self-control,  "Is  it 
your  brother?" 

No."    Hildegarde  bent  her  head  over  the  slate. 


"No." 
"Who  is  it?" 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  89 

"A  friend  of  my  father's." 

' '  Do  you  love  him  dreadfully  1 ' ' 

"Of  course  not.    I  never  saw  him." 

' '  What  makes  you  wear  his  picture  ? ' ' 

"I  only  put  it  in  the  locket  because  I  had  n't  anything 
else  the  right  size.  That  's  all." 

' '  Then  why  did  you  make  such  a  fuss  when  I— 

' '  Because  I'  thought  it  very  rude  of  you  to  look  into 
somebody  else's  locket  without  permission.  And  it 
might  have  been  something  that  mattered. ' ' 

There  was  that  in  the  unconverted  look  on  the  little 
face  which  made  Hildegarde  hot  to  her  ear-tips. 

But  Bella  said  not  a  word,  only  smiled  with  that  re 
turning  interest  in  life  that  so  readily  revives  in  the 
breast  of  the  shrewd  observer.  And  without  a  "please" 
or  a  "will  you?"  Bella  handed  the  big  girl  her  slate, 
with  its  two  days'  accumulation  of  fractions  and  of 
dragons.  Hildegarde 's  sensibilities  were  once  more  so 
outraged  that  for  a  moment  she  hesitated  to  accept  the 
task  so  coolly  put  upon  her. 

"I  believe  you  're  a  little  monster,"  said  Miss  Mar, 
in  her  slow  way.  "I  don't  see  why  I  should  trouble  my 
self  about  you  or  your  arithmetic. ' ' 

* i  I  know  why, ' '  returned  Bella,  unmoved. 

"Why?" 

"Because  you  're  the  nicest  of  all  the  big  girls." 

Hildegarde  tried  to  conceal  the  fact  that  she  was 
somewhat  softened  by  this  tribute.  "  I  'm  not  really  the 
nicest, ' '  she  said,  trying  to'  be  modest. 

* '  Well,  perhaps  you  're  not  the  nicest,  but  you  've  got 
the  longest  eyelashes.  It  's  a  good  thing  they  are  n't  as 
light  as  your  hair,  is  n  't  it  1 " 


90  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

' '  Well,  I  don 't  know.    Fives  into— ' ' 

"Yes,  you  do,  you  know  you  'd  cry  your  eyes  out  if 
your  winkers  were  as  nearly  white  as  your  hair  is. 
What  do  you  do  to  make  your  eyelashes  so  long  1 ' ' 

"Nothing.  Now  pay  attention.  You  reduce  thirty- 
three  and  a  third  to  thirds  and— ' ' 

"Did  your  mother  keep  them  cut  when  you  were  a 
baby?" 

"No,  silly." 

"I  believe  she  did."  The  next  day  Miss  Bella  ap 
peared  without  eyelashes.  Every  individual  hair  snipped 
close  to  the  lid. 

' '  I  mean  to  have  mine  just  like  Miss  Mar 's, ' '  she  told 
the  group  gathered  about  Hildegarde's  desk.  "Hers 
are  so  immense  they  trail.  I  'm  sure  they  must  get 
awfully  in  the  way  sometimes." 

"Then  I  wonder  you  run  such  a  risk.  You  'd  better 
have  left  yours  as  they  were. ' ' 

"Oh,  if  mine  grow  out  as  long  as  that,  of  course  I 
shall  plait  them  and  tie  them  up  with  blue  ribbons. ' ' 

But  it  was  not  always  admiration  to  which  she  treated 
her  patron. 

She  was  once  twitted  quite  groundlessly  with  feeling 
herself  obliged  to  "mind"  Miss  Mar. 

' '  Yes, ' '  she  said,  laughing  a  little  wickedly.  ' '  I  must, 
you  see.  She  's  so  massive.  Just  look  at  her  shoulders. 
Look  at  her  hips.  JEven  her  hair  is  massive.  See  what 
wobs  it  goes  into."  This  conversation  took  place  in  the 
cloak-room.  "Everything  about  her  is  so  big,  it  scares  a 
little  person  like  me.  Look  at  that  hat.  You  'd  know  it 
must  belong  to  Miss  Mar.  If  it  was  anybody  else's  it 
would  be  a  parasol.  But  you  can  tell  it  's  a  hat  because 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  91 

it  's  got  an  elastic  instead  of  a  stick.  And  just  look  at 
the  size  of  that  elastic.  Why,  it  's  as  broad  as  my 
garter." 

Now  and  then  she  would  startle  Hildegarde 's  self-pos 
session  by  an  outburst  of  torrential  affection.  And  so  it 
came  about  that  in  spite  of  Bella's  blithe  impertinence, 
Hildegarde  even  in  those  early  days  thought  of  her  with 
sympathy  as  a  lonely  little  being  who  was  in  reality  very 
grateful  for  a  big  girl's  friendship.  She  would  follow  at 
Hildegarde 's  heels  like  a  pet  dog,  walk  with  her  down  to 
the  gate  every  day  after  school,  and  invent  one  ingenious 
pretext  after  another  to  keep  Hildegarde  standing  there 
a  moment  longer.  Sometimes,  when  at  last  she  s.aid 
"good-by,"  there  was  not  regret  alone  but  tears  as  well 
in  Bella 's  pretty  eyes. 

"It  must  have  been  a  little  girl- at  boarding-school 
that  found  out  Friday  was  an  unlucky  day,"  she  an 
nounced  on  one  occasion.  "It  's  the  miserablest,  blackest 
day  of  the  week.  Yes  it  is,  Miss  Mar.  It  's  just  hellish. " 

"Why,  Bella  Wayne!    What  awful  language." 

"Well,  you  have  to  get  hold  of  awful  language  when 
you  're  thinking  of  an  awful  thing.  All  to-night,  and  all 
to-morrow,  and  all  to-morrow  night,  and  all  Sunday,  and 
all  Sunday  night,  to  live  through  before  I  see  you 
again!"  The  small  face  worked  with  suppressed  emo 
tion,  the  small  mind  with  suppressed  arithmetic.  Both 
eventually  found  outward  expression.  "Sixty-six 
hours ! ' '  she  said,  while  two  tears  rolled  out  of  her  eyes. 
"Sixty-six  hours  till  you  're  back  here  again.  I  don't 
honestly  think  I  can  bear  it  this  time.  I  shall  die.  I 
know  I  shall.  I  feel  very  strange  already.  Would  you 
care  if  I  died?  W-would  you  come  to  the  funeral?" 


92  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

She  choke,d.  "W-what  would  you  wear!  You  'd  look 
p-perfectly  bee-yew-tiful  in  black.  Do  wear  black.  Oh, 
I  wish  I  was  dead.  It  would  be  so  nice  to  see  how  you 
look  in  black." 

Hildegarde  was  touched  to  find  how  wildly  delighted 
the  homesick  little  girl  was  at  the  idea  of  being  invited  to 
spend  Saturday  afternoon  at  the  Mars— a  little  anxious, 
too,  was  Miss  Mar,  lest  the  occasion  should  not  come  up 
to  such  ecstatic  expectation.  Not  that  the  Mar  house 
was  at  all  the  forlorn  and  dingy  place  it  had  been  in  the 
days  when  Mrs.  Mar  struggled  alone,  with  a  scant  income 
and  three  babies.  The  general  impression  was  that  the 
Mar  boys  already  contributed  generously  to  the  family 
resources.  But  the  fact  was  that  their  mother  was  in 
geniously  making  the  very  most  of  what  "the  boys" 
added  to  the  common  purse.  The  amount  was  as  yet 
quite  trifling— "of  necessity,"  she  would  have  added, 
for  they  were  both  young  men  who  looked  ahead.  But  it 
was  really  to  Hildegarde  that  the  little  house  owed  its 
air  of  immaculate  freshness  and  good  taste.  If  she 
could  n't  play  or  sing,  she  could  paint— bookshelves,  the 
floors,  even  the  woodwork.  Several  years  ago  she  proved 
that  she  could  paper  a  room.  She  managed  to  cover  the 
old  furniture  with  charming  chintz  "for  a  song,"  and 
she  made  curtains  out  of  nothing  at  all.  No  one  could 
arrange  flowers  better  or  grow  them  half  so  well.  When 
she  was  given  money  for  her  clothes,  she  often  spent  it  on 
something  for  the  house.  Not  fully  realizing  her  genius 
for  domestic  affairs,  she  told  herself  the  reason  she  did  all 
this  was  to  make  the  house  pretty  ' '  for  when  Jack  comes 
back."  He  might  arrive  quite  suddenly.  He  did  every 
thing  without  warning.  I  may  come  home  from  school 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  93 

any  day  to  find  him  here !  Oh,  it  lent  a  wonderful  zest 
to  life  to  remember  that. 

Bella  was  pleased  to  like  Miss  Mar 's  garden  immensely, 
but  even  more  she  liked  Miss  Mar 's  room,  with  its  white 
curtains  and  dimity-covered  toilet-table,  and  the  scant 
and  simple  furniture  that  looked  so  nice  and  fresh  since 
Hildegarde  had  herself  enameled  it.  When  the  little 
visitor  looked  round  with  that  quick-glancing  admira 
tion  and  said:  "Oh,  it  's  much  prettier  than  mine  at 
home. ' ' 

"What  's  yours  like?"  asked  Miss  Mar,  politely. 

"Oh,  it  's  all  pink  silk,  and  I  'm  sick  of  it.  What 
made  you  think  of  having  everything  white  ? ' ' 

"This,  I  believe,"  said  her  hostess,  nodding  at  the 
climbing  white  rose  that  looked  in  at  the  window.  "But 
it  's  partly  that  I  like  things  that  wash  and  that  don't 
fade." 

' '  Well,  I  simply  love  your  house.  I  'd  no  idea  it  would 
be  like  this." 

' '  Why,  what  did  you  think  it  would  be  like  ? ' ' 

"Oh— a— kind  of— no,  I  shan't  say.  You  'd  misunder 
stand." 

Hildegarde  felt  it  prudent  not  to  insist.  If  you  did, 
with  this  young  person,  you  were  exposed  to  the  most 
mortifying  results. 

"Who  are  these ?"  Bella  demanded,  inspecting  the 
pictures. 

"My  brothers.    That  's  Trenn  and  this  is  Harry." 

"Will  they  be  at  tea?" 

"No,  they  're  on  a  ranch  in  Tulare  County." 

"Why,  we  've  got  a  ranch  in  Tulare  County."  She 
was  still  looking  round  as  if  expecting  to  find  something 


94  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

that  as  yet  escaped  her  eye.  "Where  's— where— a— 
Show  me  your— your  ribbons  and  things." 

"I  have  n't  got  any.  We  can't  afford  ribbons  in  this 
family." 

"Let  me  see  your  collars  and  ties,  then."  Hildegarde 
opened  her  top  drawer.  In  the  course  of  turning  over 
collars  and  handkerchiefs  and  little  boxes  the  silver 
locket  came  to  light. 

'  *  Why  don 't  you  wear  it  any  more  ? ' ' 

"Oh,  I  don't  know." 

Bella  leaned  her  head  with  its  halo  of  short,  brown 
curls  against  her  friend,  and  very  softly  she  beguiled 
her:  "Please,  Miss  Mar,  show  me  that  friend  of  your 
father's  again." 

Hildegarde  hesitated  a  moment  and  then  she  opened 
the  locket.  Jack  Galbraith's  face  smiled  out  upon  the 
big  girl  and  the  little  girl. 

' '  Did  you  say  you  had  n  't  ever  seen  him  ? ' ' 

' '  No,  he  has  n 't  been  here  for  sixteen  years.  Not  since 
he  was  a  little  boy.  And  he  might  have  been  here  al 
ways,  because  he  was  an  orphan  and  his  father  was  my 
father's  greatest  friend.  But  some  relations  of  his  that 
nobody  had  ever  heard  of  before,  they  discovered  him 
when  he  was  nine,  and  made  him  come  to  New  York  and 
live  with  them.  But  he  did  n't  like  it.  At  least—/  don't 
know— mother  thinks  they  did  n't  like  it." 

"Why  does  she  think  that?" 

"Because  they  let  him  go  away  to  school.  And  he 
spent  his  vacations  canoeing,  climbing  mountains,  and 
doing  all  sorts  of  queer  things  rather  than  live  with  his 
relations.  Then  he  went  to  Harvard,  and  then  he  went 
abroad  and  studied.  He  's  always  studying. ' ' 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  95 

' '  Gracious !  what  makes  him  do  that  ? ' ' 

"Oh,  he  wants  to  find  out  about  everything.  And 
he  's  doing  it.  He  's  written  a  book  with  things  in  it  no 
body  ever  heard  of  before.  Father  says  it  's  a  work  of 
genius.  Mr.  Galbraith  was  coming  here  two  years  ago, 
when  he  'd  finished  the  book,  only  just  then— 

"I  did  n't  think,"  Bella  interrupted  with  a  sigh,  "I 
did  n  't  think  from  his  picture  he  was  so  awful  old. ' ' 

"  He  is  n  't.    He  's  barely  twenty-five. " 

But  Bella  shook  her  head.  ' '  If  a  person  's  over  twenty 
he  might  just  as  well  be  a  hundred." 

"Yes,  ordinary  people.  But  it  does  n't  matter  how 
old  a  genius  is.  Father  's  awfully  excited  about  Mr. 
Galbraith  just  now,  for  he  's  been  away  a  year  and  a 
half  on  an  arctic  expedition  and  we  're  expecting  him 
back  next  summer.  We  may  be  hearing  from  him  any 
day  after  the  middle  of  June.  Father  and  I  often  talk 
about  it  when  we  're  alone  together. ' ' 

"Why  don't  you  talk  about  it  when  there  's  anybody 
there?" 

' '  Oh,  mother  's  always  so  down  on  Mr.  Galbraith. ' ' 

"What,  's  she  down  on  him  for?" 

"Just  because  he  wants  to  discover  the  North  Pole." 

"Well,  don't  you  think  yourself  that  's  rather—" 

"No,  I  don't." 

"  To  be  wasting  two  whole  years  in  just  hunting  round 
for  the  Pole?  What  's  the  good  of  the  Pole,  anyway?" 

Hildegarde  smiled  a  smile  of  superiority. 

"My  geography"— Bella  invoked  authority  that  even 
a  big  girl  must  respect— "my  geography  says— 

"You  're  too  young  to  understand.  It  's  not  the 
Pole.  It  's  the  glory." 


96  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"What  glory?" 

* '  Nobody  's  ever  yet  got  there. ' ' 

* '  Why  should  anybody  ?    Lots  of  nicer  places. ' ' 

1 '  A  great  many  people  have  tried.  A  good  many  have 
died  trying— 

"Well,  that  's  a  good  reason  for  not  bothering  about 
it  any  more. ' ' 

"Oh,  you  're  just  like—  But  filial  respect  re 
strained  Miss  Mar.  "I  agree  with  Mr.  Galbraith.  He 
thinks  there  's  nothing  in  the  world  half  so  interesting 
to  do." 

"Hemtwf  besffly." 

"No,  he  is  n't!  He  's  splendid—"  But  Hildegarde 
snapped  the  locket  to,  and  hid  it  under  her  best  hand 
kerchiefs. 

The  following  Saturday,  when  Bella  asked  again  to 
see  the  locket,  Miss  Mar  declined  to  bring  it  out.  Bella 
begged  in  vain.  She  discovered  that  her  big,  gentle 
friend  could  be  immovable. 

To  Hildegarde 's  dismay,  Bella  presently  dissolved  in 
tears.  ' '  Then  may  I  s-see  the  work  of  g-genius  1 ' ' 

"Yes,  you  may  look  at  his  book  all  you  like."  She 
even  let  Bella  take  it  away  with  her  to  tide  her  over 
Sunday.  But  Mr.  Galbraith 's  "Winter  among  the 
Samoyedes ' '  had  small  success  with  Miss  Wayne.  '  *  They 
make  me  sick,  those  people!  I  can't  think  how  anybody 
likes  hearing  about  their  dirty  ways, ' '  and  she  even  cast 
reflections  on  Jack  for  wasting  his  time  over  such  "hor 
rors.  ' '  However,  there  was  another  side  to  it.  1 1  What  a 
relief  it  11  be  to  him  to  be  with  us  after  the  Samoyedes ! " 

' '  With  us !  "    Hildegarde  smiled  inwardly. 

Sitting   by   the   rose-framed   window   one    Saturday 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  97 

afternoon,  talking  as  usual  about  Mr.  Galbraith  and  how 
soon  he  might  be  expected  back  from  the  Pole,  Bella  sud 
denly  burst  out:  "I  'm  tired  to  death  of  saying  'Miss 
Mar. '  I  do  wish  you  'd  let  me  call  you  '  Hildegarde. '  ' ' 

The  big  girl's  breath  was  taken  away.  For  the  gulf 
between  twelve  and  sixteen  is  a  thing  hardly  passable  in 
that  stronghold  of  class  distinction,  a  girls '  school.  It 
was  rare,  indeed,  that  one  of  Miss  Mar 's  ripe  age  stooped 
to  help  a  little  girl  over  a  difficulty  in  her  lessons.  It 
required  something  of  the  missionary  spirit  to  take  such 
pity  upon  homesickness,  as  occasionally  to  give  the 
afflicted  one  the  great  treat  of  visiting  a  big  girl  on 
Saturday  afternoon— but  really  to  go  to  the  length 
proposed — 

"I  shan't  believe  you  really  love  me,"  the  little  girl 
rushed  on,  "unless  you  say  yes.  Oh,  do  say  yes.  Every 
thing  depends  on  it.  I  '11  promise  always  to  say  'Miss 
Mar'  before  people.  But  if  you  '11  let  me  call  you  Hilde 
garde  when  we  're  alone,  I  '11  know  you  're  my  best 
friend.  And  then  I  '11  tell  you  a  secret.  I  '11  tell  you 
two.  Tremendous  secrets ! ' ' 

It  was  finally  arranged. 

"Now  for  the  tremendous  secrets,"  said  Hildegarde, 
smiling. 

But  Bella  was  portentously  grave,  even  agitated. 
"Well,"  she  said,  bracing  herself,  "my  father  's  an 
Englishman.  Don't  tell  anybody.  Cross  your  heart  and 
hope  you  may  die  if  ever  you  tell  the  girls. ' ' 

"All  right.  Cross  my  heart  and  hope  I  may  die.  But 
how  in  the  world—  ? ' ' 

"It  is  n't  my  fault,  you  see.  And  I  'm  an  American 
all  right.  I  Ve  always  wanted  to  explain  to  you  ever 


98  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

since  you  were  so  angelic  about  my  fractions;  it  's  be 
cause  my  father  's  an  Englishman  I  have  to  eat  milk 
pudding.  Over  there  "—  Bella  flicked  a  small  hand  across 
the  American  continent  and  over  the  Atlantic  deep,  to 
indicate  an  inconsiderable  island  where  the  natives  per 
sist  in  strange  customs— "over  there  they  all  do  it.  Of 
course,  the  minute  I  'm  of  age  I  shall  insist  on  pie." 
They  discussed  the  matter  in  all  its  bearings. 

"Now  about  the  other  secret." 

"Well"— even  tne  daring  Bella  caught  her  breath  and 
paused.  "No,  not  to-day.  I  '11  keep  the  tremendousest 
one  for  another  time.  But  do  get  out  the  silver  locket, 
dear  Hildegarde,  and  let  's  look  at  it. ' ' 

Ultimately  she  prevailed.  The  next  time  Bella  came 
she  found  a  delightful  surprise.  The  low  table  was 
cleared  of  everything  but  bowls  of  roses ;  and  against  the 
white  wall  great  ferns  printed  plain  their  tall  and  splen 
did  plumes— leaving  free  a  little  space  in  the  middle 
where,  on  a  gilt  nail,  hung  the  open  locket. 

Bella  was  delighted  with  the  whole  scheme.  "It  only 
wants  one  thing  to  make  it  perfect.  No,  I  won't  tell  you 
what  it  is.  I  '11  bring  it  next  Saturday. ' ' 

"It"  proved  to  be  a  paper  of  Chinese  joss-sticks,  and  a 
little  bronze  perforated  holder.  "We  must  each  burn 
one  to  him  every  week,"  she  said,  setting  up  her  contri 
bution  below  the  dangling  locket. 

"I  don't  quite  know  if  we  ought,"  Hildegarde  said. 
"Joss-sticks  are  prayers  you  know— at  least  the  Chinese 
think  so." 

"Well,  of  course  they  're  prayers.  That  's  why  I 
brought  them. ' ' 

While  the  two  joss-sticks  sent  up  into  the  rose-per- 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  99 

fumed  air  faint  spirals  of  an  alien  fragrance,  the  two 
girls  sat  in  front  of  the  confident  young  face  looking  out 
of  the  silver  locket,  and  talked  endlessly  about  the  owner. 

Hildegarde  found  it  subtly  intoxicating  to  have  so  keen 
an  auditor— a  sharer  even  (to  the  humble  extent  possible 
for  extreme  youth)  in  the  great  pivotal  romance  of  ex 
istence. 

And  then  Bella  had  such  wonderful  inspirations.  It 
was  she  who  saw  the  larger  fitness  in  Mr.  Mar's  habit  of 
going  fishing  on  Saturday  afternoons.  What  was  that 
but  an  arrangement  of  the  gods  that  he  should  be  so 
effectually  out  of  the  way,  that  Hildegarde  might  with 
safety  borrow  from  his  desk  the  Galbraith  letters.  Sitting 
close  together  on  a  square  of  Japanese  matting,  in  front 
of  the  rose  table,  an  anxious  ear  listening  for  Mrs.  Mar's 
return  from  the  missionary  meeting,  the  dark  head  leaned 
against  the  fair,  while  the  two  girls  read  and  re-read 
those  precious  documents,  in  an  atmosphere  charged  with 
incense  and  a  palpitating  joy.  One  day,  arrived  regret 
fully  at  the  end  of  the  letter  they  liked  best,  Bella  bent 
and  kissed  the  signature.  Hildegarde 's  heart  gave  a 
great  jump.  The  daring  of  that  deed  was  well-nigh  im 
pious.  Hildegarde,  when  all  by  herself,  had  done  the 
same,  but  that  was  different. 

"Now  you  know  my  other  secret,"  said  Bella,  very 
pink— "the  tremendousest  one  of  all."  When  the  first 
shock  had  died  away,  Hildegarde  was  left  with  a  pitiful 
tenderness  before  the  disarming  frankness  of  such  a  con 
fession.  Poor  little  Bella !  Why,  Jack  did  n't  even  know 
of  her  existence.  He  never  would,  till  in  some  rare  idle 
hour  of  the  glorious  future,  Hildegarde  should  tell  him 
of  a  little  homesick  girl  she  had  befriended  once  at  school. 


100  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

But  Bella  could  be  depended  on  to  break  in  upon  such 
gracious  forecasting  of  the  future,  with  a  suddenness  that 
made  the  picture  dance,  "Which  of  us  two  do  you  sup 
pose  Jack  '11  fall  in  love  with  ? ' ' 

Hildegarde,  almost  paralyzed  by  the  presumption  this 
implied,  barely  managed  to  bring  out,  "You  're  much  too 
little  to  think  of—" 

"I  shan't  be  little  always." 

"You  '11  always  be  more  than  twelve  years  younger 
than  Mr.  Galbraith."  Hildegarde  always  said  Mr.  Gal- 
braith  when  she  wanted  to  keep  the  intruder  at  a  dis 
tance. 

But  Bella  advanced  as  bold  as  brass.  "Anyhow  I  think 
he  '11  fall  in  love  with  me. ' ' 

"Of  course  a  person  so  modest  would  be  likely  to  ap 
peal  to  any  gentleman. ' ' 

' '  No,  it  's  not  my  being  modest  he  '11  mind  about.  It  's 
other  things. ' ' 

"What  other  things?" 

"Well— you— of  course  you  Ve  got  your  eyelashes, 
and  you  're  in  the  full  bloom  of  womanhood.  But  1  'm 
in  the  first  blush  of  youth.  I  think  he  '11  like  that  best. ' ' 

It  was  the  second  Saturday  in  June,  and  school  was 
breaking  up  next  week.  Mrs.  Mar  had  finished  off  the 
Braut  von  Messina  in  the  dining-room,  and  barely  be 
gun  with  the  Hindu  Mission  on  the  other  side  of  the  city. 
Hildegarde  had  retired  to  her  room  to  watch,  not  for 
Bella's  coming  (the  window  did  not  command  the  front), 
but  for  Mr.  Mar's  going  down  the  garden  with  rod  and 
creel.  What  made  him  so  dilatory  to-day  1  While  Hilde 
garde  wondered,  Bella  came  flying  in,  shut  the  door 
with  agitated  care,  faced  about  with  cheeks  of  crimson, 


The  two  girls  sat  in  front  of  the  confident  young  face  looking 
out  of  the  silver  locket " 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  101 

hat  over  one  ear  and  the  whisper,  "Hildegarde,  I  've 
seen  him !  I  've  seen  him !  Oh,  Hildegarde,  he  's  here ! ' ' 
Wherewith  she  precipitated  herself  upon  her  friend's 
neck  and  hugged  her  breathlessly. 

"Who,  who?" 

' '  Why,  '  he. '    He  's  here  !  The  only  man  I  ever  loved ! ' ' 

Hildegarde  took  the  dancing  dervish  by  the  shoulders. 
"You  don't  mean—" 

"Yes,  yes,  I  do.  He  came  in  just  before  me.  He  's 
perfectly  glorious.  Just  to  look  at  him  makes  you  feel— 
makes  you  think  you  've  got  windmills  shut  up  inside 
you.  Everything  goes  whirling  round.  And  when  he 
asked"  (Bella  lowered  her  pipe  to  a  masculine  depth)  : 
'  '  Is  Mr.  Mar  at  home  ? '  it  sounded  so  beautiful,  I  thought 
for  a  moment  he  was  talking  poetry.  Oh,  Hildegarde! 
Hildegarde!"  Again  she  sunk  her  ecstacy  to  whispering 
as  she  followed  her  friend  out  into  the  hall.  Together 
they  hung  over  the  banisters.  The  visitor  was  talking 
more  poetry  apparently  in  the  dining-room.  The  two 
girls  stayed  suspended  there  an  eternity.  At  last  with 
thumping  hearts,  upon  Bella's  suggestion,  they  went 
down  into  the  entry.  "We  '11  pretend  to  be  putting  on 
our  overshoes.  I  '11  have  Mrs.  Mar's!"  whispered 
Bella,  excitedly,  ignoring  the  fact  that  the  continued  fine 
weather  and  dusty  streets  lent  an  air  of  eccentricity  to 
the  proceeding.  She  stopped  after  drawing  on  one  big 
overshoe  and  shuffled  softly  to  the  dining-room  door.  She 
put  her  eye  to  the  keyhole.  No  use.  Notwithstanding 
Hildegarde 's  whispered  remonstrance,  she  glued  her  ear 
to  the  aperture.  The  door  was  suddenly  opened  and  Miss 
Bella  fell  sideways  into  the  arms  of  an  astonished  young 
man,  who  said:  "Hello,  what  's  this?"  Hildegarde, 


102  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

drowned  in  sympathetic  confusion,  helped  Bella  to  regain 
her  equilibrium,  while  she  muttered  the  explanation 
"Overshoes!" 

"This  is  my  daughter  Hildegarde,  Mr.  Cheviot," 
said  Mr.  Mar,  "and  this  is  our  little  friend,  Bella 
Wayne." 

"Ch-Cheviot!"  stuttered  the  little  friend. 

The  young  man  with  the  laughing  eyes  said:  "Any 
thing  wrong  with  the  name  ? ' '  and  having  shaken  hands 
with  "my  daughter  Hildegarde,"  he  departed. 

"Did  you  say  his  name  was  Cheviot?"  Hildegarde 
asked  her  father. 

"Yes.  The  new  recruit  at  the  bank.  Seems  to  be  an 
intelligent  sort  of  fellow." 

WITH  ease  and  celerity  Miss  Bella  transferred  her  affec 
tions  from  a  faded  photograph,  a  packet  of  letters,  and  a 
book  of  travels,  to  a  real  live  young  man  with  a  square 
jaw  that  looked  as  if  he  meant  business,  but  with  a  ready 
laugh,  too,  as  if  the  business  were  not  without  its  divert 
ing  aspect.  Then  he  had  rough  brown  hair  that ' '  fitted ' ' 
him.  Bella  would  have  told  you  this  was  a  rarity,  most 
people's  beginning  too  far  back  from  the  forehead,  or 
growing  too  much  away  from  the  ears,  leaving  them 
with  a  bare  and  naked  look.  Or  it  grew  in  a  peak.  Or  it 
did  n't  grow  low  enough  on  the  neck  and  was  like  a 
badly  made  wig,  that  had  slipped  forward.  Or  worse 
than  anything,  it  forgot  where  to  stop  and  grew  down 
into  the  collar  like  Professor  Altberg's,  prompting  the  ir 
reverent  Bella  to  whisper  to  her  neighbor  (while  the 
grave  instructor  was  sitting  with  head  bent  over  a  Latin 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  103 

exercise)  :  "How  far  do  you  think  it  goes?    Do  you  sup 
pose  he  's  hairy  all  down  his  back  ? ' ' 

However  that  might  be,  Cheviot's  hair  fitted  him. 
Moreover,  he  had,  in  Bella's  estimation,  a  fascinating,  if 
somewhat  mocking  air  toward  little  girls,  and  he  helped 
one  little  girl  gallantly  through  the  dismal  Sundays  by 
the  simple  process  of  sitting  in  church  where  she  could 
watch  him.  Once  in  a  while  in  coming  out,  Bella  would 
catch  his  eye,  and  he  would  laugh  and  give  her  a  nod. 
On  the  rare  occasions  of  his  encountering  Miss  Bella  at 
the  Mars',  he  never  failed  to  stop  and  mimic  her  first 
greeting,  "I  'm  ' Ch-Cheviot, '  you  know.  Now  what  's 
the  matter  with  that  name  1 ' '  which  was  vastly  entertain 
ing,  not  to  say  ' '  taking. ' ' 

JOHN  GALBRAITH  came  back  to  America  that  autumn, 
but  he  stayed  in  the  East. 

Bella  did  n't  much  care  what  he  did  now,  for  she  was 
thirteen,  and  in  spite  of  the  ugliness  of  their  Hindu 
protegee  Miss  Wayne  had  joined  the  Busy  Bees.  That 
was  because  Hildegarde  had  told  her  that  Louis  Cheviot 
went  to  their  dances.  Bella  saw  at  once  the  fitness  of  her 
doing  the  same.  The  result  was  that  she  seldom  waltzed 
less  than  twice  with  the  new  hero,  who,  it  must  be  ad 
mitted,  was  a  better  batsman  than  dancer.  But  nobody 
could  help  "getting  through"  with  Bella  as  a  partner, 
for  she  danced  divinely.  Cheviot  should  have  been  better 
pleased  to  get  her  for  his  partner,  but  it  was  plain  that 
he  was  unduly  preoccupied  about  "my  daughter  Hilde 
garde.  ' '  Several  of  the  young  men  were.  Bella  told  her 
self  with  a  consciousness  of  native  worth,  that  she  had 


104  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

never  minded  in  the  least  before.  But  this  was  different. 
She  made  up  her  mind  that  if  "Ch-Cheviot"  goaded  her 
much  further  by  this  display  of  misplaced  devotion,  she 
would  just  take  the  misguided  young  man  aside  some 
day  and  talk  to  him  ' '  as  a  friend. ' ' 

She  would  tell  him  about  Jack  Galbraith. 


CHAPTER  VI 

ELLA  WAYNE'S  father  had  been  in  the 
royal  navy.  His  health  had  given  way 
about  the  same  time  as  his  patience  on  the 
vexed  question  of  non-promotion.  He  re 
tired  from  the  service,  went  with  his 
American  wife  and  family  to  California  on  a  visit, 
became  enamoured  of  the  climate,  bought  a  place,  and 
settled  there.  The  three  youngest  of  his  seven  children 
were  born  in  Tulare  County,  but  for  him  "home"  was 
still  England,  however  ungrateful.  They  all  went  back 
every  second  year  to  visit  his  father  in  Staffordshire,  and 
when  Bella's  two  sisters  found  English  husbands,  there 
were  three  reasons  for  the  recurrent  visit  to  the  old 
country.  The  eldest  son,  Tom  Wayne,  had  made  a 
fortune  on  the  New  York  Stock  Exchange  and  married 
a  girl  belonging  to  one  of  the  old  Knickerbocker  families. 
Tom's  country  house  on  Staten  Island  proved  highly 
convenient  as  a  half-way  station  between  England  and 
California.  Mrs.  Tom  was  a  very  charming  person,  and 
a  certain  portion  of  Bella's  satisfaction  in  going  abroad 
lay  in  the  chance  it  presented  of  making  a  visit  to  Staten 
Island,  on  the  way  over  and  back.  Nevertheless,  as  she 
never  failed  to  tell  Hildegarde  on  her  return,  there  was 
no  place  to  be  compared  to  California,  no  friend  and  no 
"in-law"  who  could  make  up  to  her  for  being  away  from 


"  .111-10,  w      wiio  couiu  maKe 

105 


106  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

Hildegarde,  and  she  might  have  added,  from  the  neigh 
borhood  of  that  obdurate  creature  with  the  cold  blue 
eyes  and  the  colder  heart,  Louis  Cheviot.  Those  who 
thought  about  it  at  all  were  surprised  that  the  friendship 
of  the  two  girls  was  not  more  interrupted  upon  Hilde 
garde 's  graduating  from  the  school,  when  Bella  was  less 
than  fifteen.  But  not  upon  community  of  tasks,  rather 
upon  something  essential  in  the  nature  of  each  had  their 
alliance  been  founded— kept  vital  by  wants  in  each  that 
the  other  could  supply,  excesses  in  each  that  the  other 
helped  to  modify.  They  themselves  thought  their  rela 
tion  had  its  deeper  roots  in  a  conviction  of  the  peculiar 
sanctity  of  girls'  friendships;  a  creed  to  which  Hilde 
garde 's  fidelity  effected  Miss  Bella's  actual  adhesion  only 
by  degrees  and  with  notable  backslidings. 

But  even  in  early  days,  Bella  felt  it  was  highly  distin 
guished  to  stand  in  this  relation  to  one  who  thought  and 
talked  about  it  as  Hildegarde  did.  Had  n't  she  said  in 
that  soft,  deliberate  way  of  hers,  that  it  was  capable  of 
being  one  of  the  most  beautiful  things  in  all  the  beautiful 
world?  It  was  something,  she  said,  no  man  knew  any 
thing  about.  Why,  they  presumed  to  doubt  its  possibility 
even !  Ah,  they  should  have  known  Hildegarde  Mar  and 
Bella  Wayne.  Men  believed  that  all  girls  were,  at  heart, 
jealous  of  all  other  girls.  They  thought  meanly  of  the 
sex.  They  pointed  to  David  and  Jonathan,  to  Orestes 
and  Pylades,  to  instances  innumerable  of  men's  faithful 
ness  to  men.  But  what  bard  or  legend  celebrates 
woman's  friendship  as  toward  woman?  Well,  you  see, 
all  the  chroniclers  since  the  beginning  of  the  world  have 
been  of  the  scoffer's  sex.  That  was  why  women's  friend 
ships  had  never  been  celebrated— though  men  said  the 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  107 

real  reason  was— oh,  they  spoke  blasphemies !— and  they 
had  n't  known  Hildegarde  and  Bella.  It  was  Hilde 
garde 's  theme,  but  Bella  agreed  to  every  word.  Yes, 
yes,  their  friendship  would  show  the  world ! 

For  qualities  alien  to  her  own,  Hildegarde  came  to  look 
upon  her  little  friend  with  an  adoring  admiration. 
Bella's  wit  and  Bella's  originality,  Bella's  entire  "mode 
of  being, ' '  were  at  once  tonic  and  delight.  Then,  too,  be 
hind  her  provoking  charm  was  a  finished  daintiness, 
which  with  her  became  elevated  into  a  special  quality, 
distinctive,  all-pervading,  a  certain  strangeness  of 
fragility— a  physical  fineness  like  the  peculiar  fineness  of 
a  flower — a  something  suggesting  evanescence,  and  hav 
ing  the  subtle  pathos  of  the  thing  that  may  not,  cannot 
bide. 

It  would  have  been  hard  to  say  which  was  of  most  use 
to  the  other  in  making  clearer  the  riddle  of  life,  or  more 
radiant  the  beauty  of  the  world,  or  more  wonder-waking, 
the  mystery  of  a  young  girl's  heart.  They  read,  and 
walked,  and  talked,  and  worked,  together,  paying  their 
vaunted  friendship  a  finer  tribute  than  words,  however 
honestly  uttered;  for  they  grew  in  each  other's  company. 

The  younger,  too,  was  cured  of  certain  of  her  more  in 
admissible  ' '  ways, ' '  while  the  elder  learned  from  Butter 
fly  Bella  many  a  thing  besides  the  art  of  making  the  most 
of  her  beauty. 

Not  that  Hildegarde  despised  this  last.  She  had  none 
of  the  comfort  of  knowing  it  was  part  of  her  largeness  of 
nature,  that  she  should  take  more  easily  to  beautifying 
her  home  than  to  making  the  best  of  herself.  Indeed  to 
the  end  of  time,  she  required  guidance  in  matters  of 
dress.  And  who  so  well  qualified  as  Miss  Bella  to  give 


108  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

advice.  She  went  further :  with  her  own  ingenious  little 
hands  she  made  the  most'  becoming  of  ' '  shirt-waists, ' ' 
trimmed  heavenly  hats,  and  firmly  forbade  fripperies. 

* '  No,  no,  they  're  not  for  the  massive. ' '  She  applauded 
her  friend  for  not  wearing  trinkets— she  did  n't  like  to 
see  her  even  with  her  maternal  grandmother's  emerald 
brooch.  "No,  I  don't  like  you  in  'didoes'  of  any  sort. 
They  're  too  insignificant  for  you.  You  ought  to  wear 
ropes  of  pearls,  or  a  tiara  of  diamonds,  or  better  still, 
something  barbaric— what  's  one  little  lady-like  emerald 
set  in  a  filigree  of  diamond  chips?  Why,  it  can't  even  be 
seen— on  you.  Of  course  the  emerald  's  a  pretty  little 
stone,  and  the  old  setting  's  nice.  It  would  shine  out  on 
me,  but— well,  it  's  simply  lost,  you  know,  on  your  heroic 
neck." 

Hildegarde  deplored  her  size,  she  carried  it  even  with 
a  sense  of  humiliation  just  as  she  bore  with  her  lack  of 
elegant  accomplishments.  It  was  pretty  terrible  to  have 
to  put  up  with  being  such  a  great  lump— especially  with 
the  ethereal  Bella  always  by  to  point  the  advantage  of 
the  opposite.  Still,  there  was  no  blinking  the  facts. 
"You  're  right,  I  believe,  didoes  of  any  sort  are  rather 
wasted  on  me,"  Hildegarde  would  say  meekly,  "I  must 
have  felt  that  when  I  hardly  ever  wore  them— though  I 
liked  them.  It  takes  you,  Bella,  to  explain  things. ' ' 

Nothing  was  ever  allowed  to  come  in  the  way  of  their 
spending  their  Saturday  afternoons  together,  and  if,  as 
time  went  on,  less  was  heard  about  Jack  from  Hildegarde, 
it  was  only  because  so  very  much  more  was  heard  about 
Cheviot  from  Bella. 

It  was  a  difficult  moment  when  two  girls  with  such 
lofty  ideas  of  friendship  met  for  the  first  time  after  Che- 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  109 

viot  had  said  to  Hildegarde  at  a  dance:  "When  are  you 
going  to  begin  to  care  for  me  ? "  She  had  been  so  taken 
by  surprise  that  she  had  only  smiled  and  said:  "I  don't 
know,"  but  she  thought  hardly  less  of  Bella  at  the  mo 
ment  than  she  thought  of  Jack.  So  the  next  time  that 
Bella  remarked  by  the  way:  "Is  n't  he  perfectly  fasci 
nating?"  Hildegarde  had  hesitated,  and  she— yes— she 
was  actually  getting  red.  Bella  stared,  "Why,  are  you 
coming  to — to — " 

"No;  oh,  no!     Only—  " 

"Only  what?" 

"It  's  dreadfully  hard,  but  I  have  n't  forgotten  our 
compact.  So  I  suppose  I  've  got  to  tell  you  what— what 
he  said  to  me  last  night." 

Bella  received  the  information  with  a  half -hysterical 
pretense  of  carrying  it  off  gaily.  "Well,  what  's  there 
new  in  that  ?  As  if  every  soul  in  Valdivia  has  n  't  known 
for  perfect  ages  that  he  cares  about  you  frightfully.  I 
don't  mind  you.  Because  you  're  Hildegarde,  and  any 
man  who  did  n't  love  you  must-*- well,  there  must  be 
something  pretty  wrong  about  him.  I  shall  give  him  a 
whole  year— maybe  even  two,  to  go  on  like  that,  and  then 
when  I  'm  sixteen,  or  seventeen  at  the  latest,  I  won't  have 
it  any  longer. ' ' 

Hildegarde,  enormously  relieved,  laughed  and  kissed 
her.  ' '  Oh,  you  nice,  funny  child ! ' ' 

"Only  promise  me  again,  cross  your  heart  and  hope 
you  may  die,  if  you  ever  keep  anything  from  me  about 
Louis  Cheviot. ' ' 

Hildegarde  complied  and  life  went  on  as  before— only 
that  Hildegarde  showed  herself  less  ready  to  fall  in  with 
Bella's  ecstasies.  An  instinct  to  forestall  a  possible 


110  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

jealousy  made  her  cavil  from  time  to  time.  "Don't  you 
think  his  shoulders  are  too  broad  for  his  height  ? ' ' 

1 l  No,  I  don  %  and  look  how  splendidly  he  carries  them. 
You  have  to  see  him  beside  a  huge  man,  like  Mr.  Mar, 
before  you  realize— ' ' 

"Yes,  yes;  that  's  true/'  Hildegarde  hastened  to  heal 
the  wound. 

"And,  anyhow,  I  don't  think  it  's  kind  of  you  to  run 
Louis  down.  I  am  always  very  nice  about  Jack. ' ' 

The  end  of  it  was  that  Cheviot  came  more  and  more  to 
the  Mar  house,  and  seemed  so  diverted  when  he  found  the 
lively  Bella  there,  that  Hildegarde  gave  herself  up  with 
out  reserve  to  the  three-cornered  friendship. 

He  took  the  girls  boating  and  organized  parties  to  the 
Tule  Lands,  and  was  altogether  a  most  invaluable  ally  in 
the  agreeable  pursuit  of  being  a  young  lady  in  her  first 
season. 

Still,  when  Bella  praised  him  absolutely  without 
moderation,  "Y-yes,"  Hildegarde  would  respond,  "he  is 
nice,  only— 

"Only  what?"  says  Miss  Bella,  instantly  on  the  de 
fensive. 

' l  Well,  you  know  I  prefer  big  men. ' ' 

"Of  course  you  do.  It  's  being  so  massive  yourself. 
But  he  's  exactly  the  right  size  for  me. ' ' 

* '  Oh,  yes,  and  he  's  quite  the  nicest  of  all  the  Valdivia 
boys." 

"Well,  that  's  going  pretty  far,"  says  Bella,  with  an 
edge  in  her  voice. 

Then  the  other,  with  that  recurrent  though  only  half- 
conscious  need  to  show  that  after  all,  she,  Hildegarde, 
was  n't  dazzled— not  being  in  Bella's  state,  she  could  see 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  111 

blemishes— the  older  girl  would  add:  "And  yet  somehow 
for  all  his  niceness,  and  making  us  always  have  a  good 
time  when  he  's  there,  to  my  thinking  there  's  something 
terribly  unromantic  about  Louis  Cheviot. ' ' 

"Now  you  only  say  that,"  retorts  Miss  Bella,  with 
sparkling  eyes,  "because  he  's  in  a  bank." 

"No— no,"  vaguely,  "but  I  don't  believe  he  's  got  any 
soul." 

"Just  because  he  is  n't  hunting  the  North  Pole !" 

' '  No.    That  is  n  't  the  reason.    I  assure  you  it  is  n  't. " 

"Then  it  can  only  be  because  he  likes  to  laugh  at 
everything. ' ' 

"He  is  pretty  frivolous,"  said  Hildegarde,  "and  he 
ridicules  friendship.  But  no,  it  's  not  that,  either.  It  's 
because  he  's  kind  of  chilling.  To  me." 

"Chilling  to  you?"  Bella  beamed.  "Oh,  do  tell  me 
about  that." 

' '  Sometimes  he  's  positively  rude. ' ' 

"To  you?"    Bella  could  have  danced. 

"To  anybody." 

"Oh,  but  when  was  he  positively  rude  to  you?  How 
black-hearted  of  you,  Hildegarde,  not  to  tell  me  that  be 
fore  !  You  might  have  known  I  'd  simply  love  hearing 
about  that." 

Hildegarde  laughed.  "Why,  I  have  n't  seen  you  since 
Thursday." 

"Was  it  at  your  birthday  party?" 

"Yes,  at  the  birthday  party." 

"Well,  well,  how  did  he  do  it?    What  did  he  say?" 

"It  was  after  we  'd  all  been  reading  the  poem  that 
came  with  Eddie  Cox 's  present.  Louis  made  fun  of  it. ' ' 

' '  That  was  only  being  rude  to  Eddie. ' '  Bella 's  face  fell. 


112  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"Wait  till  you  hear.  I  defended  it,  of  course,  and 
said :  '  It  is  n  't  as  easy  as  it  looks  to  make  birthday  odes. ' 
'It  certainly  does  n't  look  difficult— to  make  that  kind,' 
he  said.  '  Then  why, '  I  said,  just  to  stand  up  for  Eddie, 
'why  have  you  never  written  a  poem  about  my  airy 
tread?'  And  Louis  said:  'Well,  there  may  be  another 
reason,  but  no  girl  who  stands  five  foot  ten  in  her  stock 
ings  and  weighs  a  hundred  and  fifty  pounds  need  ask  it. ' 
That  's  the  kind  of  thing." 

It  was  an  incident  Miss  Bella  loved  to  recall.  No  man 
could  be  really  in  love  with  a  girl  he  had  said  that  to. 

But  some  months  later,  Hildegarde  was  obliged,  ac 
cording  to  the  code,  to  report  that  Cheviot  had  been 
"going  on"  again. 

Bella  insisted  on  having  all  the  ' '  horrid  details. ' ' 

' '  It  was  last  night  at  the  taffy  pulling.  You  know  how 
we  'd  all  been  laughing  at  his  stories  of  Miss  Monk  meet 
ing  the  Carters'  black  cow—" 

"Yes,  yes." 

"Well,  I  was  laughing  so  I  could  n't  stop,  and  it  was 
so  warm  in  that  room  the  candy  was  melting.  You  re 
member  he  said— 

"Oh,  yes,"  said  Bella,  with  feeling,  "7  remember.  He 
said  you  must  come  and  pull  with  him. ' ' 

"  —  out  in  the  porch  where  the  candy  and  I  would  cool 
off." 

*  •  And  you  went. ' ' 

"And  he  made  more  jokes  on  the  way  out.  I  begged 
him  not  to  talk  any  more,  for  I  'd  got  into  a  silly  mood 
and  everything  he  said  made  me  laugh.  'I  know,  I 
know, '  he  said.  '  I  labor  under  the  fatal  disadvantage  of 
the  funny  man,  but  I  could  make  you  serious  you  know. ' 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  113 

And    then— then— he    had    the    impertinence— to    kiss 
me." 
"Oh,Hildegarde!" 

"Yes.  It  was  dreadfully  grotesque,  too— our  hands 
were  stuck  together  by  that  great  yellow  rope  of  taffy, 
and  I  could  only  stammer  and  get  redder.  But  I  did  say 
I  was  not  going  to  forgive  him.  Nobody  had  ever  been 
so  rude  to  me  before.  Then  he  got  awfully  serious  and 
said  all  kinds  of  things—  " 

"Wfcrtkind?" 

1  'And  at  last  he  asked  me  what  was  wrong  with 
Ch-Cheviot— your  old  joke,  you  know." 

Bella  clenched  her  hands.  Sacrilege!  to  present  her 
joke  to  another  girl!  She  had  always  imagined  that 
would  be  just  how  he  would  propose  to  her.  He  would  say : 
' '  Bella,  my  beautiful,  what 's  the  matter  with  Ch-Cheviot  ? ' ' 

"Well,  goon." 

"  If  I  did  n  't  like  him  enough  he  said,  what  sort  of  man 
was  I  going  to  like  ?  And  I  thought  it  only  fair  to  give 
him  some  idea,  so  I  tried  to  soften  it  by  laughing  a  little 
-I  'd  forgiven  him  by  then,  you  know,  for  he  'd  said 
such  things— 

"What  things?" 

"Oh,  sorry  kind  of  things,  and  he  looked  so— so— well, 
I  'd  forgiven  him.  But  I  told  him  plainly  that  if  it  ever 
is  a  question  of  the  sort  of  man  I  am  to  care  for,  it  won 't 
be  some  one  who  is  just  nice  and  makes  me  have  a  good 
time.  It  will  be  some  great,  gloomy  creature  who  makes 
me  cry— and  lifts  me  to  the  stars.  I  was  laughing,  but  I 
meant  it— and  I  said:  'I  'd  worship  that  kind  of  man.'  " 

' '  What  did  he  say  then  ? ' ' 

"Well,  he  looked  sort  of  down  I  thought,  so  I  said: 


114  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

'You  would  n't  let  me  worship  you,  even  if  I  could.' 
'  I  'd  let  you  love  me, '  he  said. ' ' 

"Oh-h.    What  else?" 

"We  went  in  after  that." 

"And  he  was  just   as  funny  as  ever,"  said  Bella, 
clutching  at  frail  comfort. 

"Oh,  quite,"  agreed  Hildegarde. 

It  was  small  consolation  to  Miss  Bella  that  Cheviot  was 
singular  in  his  obduracy.  Before  she  was  eighteen  she 
was  uncommonly  well  accustomed  to  seeing  the  stoutest 
masculine  defenses  go  down  before  her.  The  two  Mar 
boys  had  long  been  her  devoted  slaves.  And  Bella  had 
flirted  with  both  of  them  impartially,  taking  what  she  felt 
was  only  a  becoming  share  in  the  interest  all  Valdivia 
felt  in  those  go-ahead  young  men,  whenever  they  came 
home  for  a  visit.  They  were  pointed  to  as  models.  Look 
how  they  "got  on"— they  did  it  visibly— while  you 
looked  they  seemed  to  have  to  restrain  themselves  from 
rising  out  of  your  sight.  They  kept  Miss  Bella  supplied 
with  candy  and  flowers  and  they  corresponded  with  her 
when  she  went  abroad.  Secretly  dreading  the  fascina 
tions  of  the  Britisher,  they  asked  in  scoffing  postscripts 
how  the  effete  nations  were  getting  on.  Bella's  view  of 
all  this  was  that,  provided  the  young  men  were  "nice," 
a  girl  could  hardly  have  too  many  of  them  contending 
for  her  favor.  It  was  what  they  were  there  for.  Each 
time  she  came  home,  she  brought  the  Mar  boys  a  scarf-pin 
apiece,  and  pleased  them  still  more  by  invariably  de 
manding  a  cent  in  return.  "I  can't  give  you  a  thing 
with  a  point.  Something  dreadful  would  happen !  you 
must  buy  them."  That  looked,  they  felt,  as  if  she  were 
"taking  it  seriously"— but  which  was  she  taking? 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  115 

The  year  that  Bella  was  eighteen,  after  a  summer  in 
England,  she  arrived  at  Staten  Island  just  in  time  to 
celebrate  her  birthday.  She  was  full  of  joy  at  getting 
back. 

The  conscious  approval  that  she  bestowed  on  the 
greater  splendor  of  the  American  autumn  had  been  gen 
erously  extended  to  the  profusion  of  fine  fruit  that  greets 
one  here  at  breakfast,  to  the  individual  bathrooms,  even 
to  the  spacious,  drawered,  behooked,  and  shelved  clothes- 
closets  so  agreeably  numerous  in  the  American  house. 
The  same  satisfaction  with  which  she  had  noted  these 
things  consciously  revisited  her  as  she  trod  the  wide, 
shallow  steps  of  the  staircase,  that  in  its  descent  halted 
leisurely  upon  two  broad  landings,  having  each  a  large 
unglazed  window  opening  upon  the  hall  below.  The  ob 
servant  young  eyes  paid  a  flitting  tribute  to  the  beautiful 
woodwork  of  the  balusters  and  the  great  tall  doors  of  the 
rooms  she  passed,  deciding  as  she  went,  there  's  nothing 
nicer  than  a  new  American  house,  unless  it  's  an  old 
(and  a  very  old)  English  one.  Even  then,  to  live  in, 
give  her  the  American. 

Like  so  many  of  the  first  generation  born  in  "the 
States,"  this  child  of  an  old-world  father  was  more 
American  in  tastes  and  spirit  than  any  daughter  of  the 
Revolution.  But,  partly  as  a  matter  of  physical  in 
heritance,  partly,  perhaps,  because  of  her  frequent  visits 
to  England,  she  bore  about  her  still  a  good  deal  of  the 
peculiar  stamp  of  a  certain  type  of  English  girl.  As  she 
came  trailing  slowly  down  the  wide  staircase  of  Tom 
Wayne's  country  house  on  Staten  Island,  the  practised 
eye  would  have  little  difficulty  in  detecting  a  difference 
between  the  figure  on  the  stair  and  the  typical  "Amer- 


116  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

lean  beauty, ' '  a  something  less  sumptuous  and  more  dis 
tinguished.  Her  head  held  not  quite  so  high,  and  yet  in 
her  carriage  something  indefinably  more  aloof.  The 
longer  waist,  not  quite  so  ruthlessly  stayed  and  belted, 
giving  an  effect  of  greater  ease;  the  longer  neck,  the 
shoulders  a  little  more  sloping,  the  eyes  less  eager  and 
yet  with  more  vision  in  them— something  in  the  whole, 
gracious  as  the  aspect  was,  a  little  reluctant  and  more 
than  a  little  elusive.  The  Paquin  gown  Bella  had  brought 
back  and  wore  to-night  for  the  first  time,  was  long,  and 
straight,  and  plainer  than  prescribed  by  the  New  York 
fashion  of  the  moment— a  gauze,  discreetly  iridescent, 
showing  over  a  white  satin  petticoat  shifting  lights  of 
pink,  and  pearl,  and  silver,  a  gown  that  shimmered  as 
the  wearer  walked,  and  clothed  her  in  glancing  light  and 
soft-hued  shadows. 

Bella  knew  that  she  was  very  early,  and  she  came 
down  slowly,  drawing  a  long  glove  up  her  slim,  bare 
arm.  When  she  reached  the  square  window  on  the 
lower  landing,  she  stopped,  laid  the  other  glove  on  the 
sill,  and  proceeded  to  button  the  one  she  had  on.  A 
slight  noise  in  the  hall  below  made  her  lean  her  arms  on 
the  broad,  polished  sill  of  the  opening,  and  look  down. 

A  man  stood  by  a  table  facing  her,  but  with  eyes  bent 
upon  the  books  he  was  turning  over— a  man  rather  over 
medium  height,  sunburnt,  with  a  lean,  clean-shaven  face, 
fair  hair,  and  clean  cut  mouth  and  chin.  That  was  all 
she  had  time  to  take  in  before  he  raised  his  eyes. 

"Oh!"  ejaculated  Bella,  involuntarily,  and  then  after 
meeting  a  moment  longer  the  wide,  unwinking,  upward 
look,  "How  do  you  do!"  she  said. 

"How  do  you  do,"  echoed  the  sunburnt  man,  and  he 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  117 

did  not  bow  nor  move ;  just  stood  looking  at  the  picture 
up  there  on  the  wall. 

Miss  Bella  was  not  as  a  rule  easily  embarrassed,  but 
she  was  conscious  now  of  feeling  a  little  at  a  loss. 

"I  don't  know  exactly  why  I  am  in  such  a  hurry  to 
say  '  how  do  you  do, '  that  I  can 't  wait  till  I  come  down. 
But  I  do  know  you,  don't  I?" 

"Of  course  you  know  me";  but  that  time  he  smiled, 
and  Bella  said  to  herself,  how  could  I  have  forgotten 
anybody  so— so— 

She  picked  up  her  glove  with  the  intention  of  running 
down.  But,  I  expect  I  look  rather  nice  here  in  the  win 
dow,  she  reflected,  and  instead  of  going  down  instantly 
she  said :  "It  's  some  time  since  I  was  here  before. ' ' 

"Yes,  it  's  a  long  time,"  he  answered.  His  tone 
pleased  her. 

"And  I  run  about  the  world  such  a  lot,  I  can't  be  ex 
pected  to  remember  everybody's  name  just  all  at  once, 
can  I?" 

' '  Oh,  the  name  does  n  't  matter. ' ' 

' '  Does  that  mean  you  are  n 't  quite  sure  of  mine  ? ' ' 

' '  I  have  n 't  the  faintest  notion  of  it. ' ' 

"Then  how  do  you  know— what  made  you  say,  'Of 
course  I  knew  you '  ? " 

' '  Because  I  was  sure  you  did. ' ' 

"Why  should  I  remember  you,  any  more  than  you 
should  remember  me  ?  Are  you  somebody  very  special  ? ' ' 

"Very  special." 

"Who?" 

"Oh,  you  '11  hear." 

"How  shall  I  hear?" 

"I  '11  tell  you  myself." 


118  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"Well,  go  on." 

"I  can't,  now." 

"Why  not?" 

"You— you  're  too  far  off." 

'  *  When  I  come  down,  you  '11  tell  me  ? " 

"Will  you?— will  you  ever  come  down?"  He  was 
smiling. 

"Why  should  n't  I?"  she  said,  bewildered. 

"I  never  saw  it  tried  before." 

1  i  Never  saw  me  try  to  come  down-stairs ! ' ' 

"Never,  yet." 

Had  he  been  here  that  time  she  sprained  her  ankle? 
' '  Do  you  imagine  I  'm  lame  ? ' ' 

"On  the  contrary,  I  'm  ready  to  believe  you  have 
wings.  Please  fly  down." 

"What  a  very  odd  person  you  are !  I  can't  think  how 
I  came  to  forget— ' 

He  made  no  answer.  Just  stood  there  leaning  against 
the  heavy  table,  half -smiling  and  never  turning  away  his 
eyes. 

She  caught  up  her  glove  and  ran  down  several  steps, 
but  just  before  she  reached  the  open  place  where  the 
stair  turned  abruptly,  and  the  solid  wall  gave  way  to  a 
procession  of  slender  pillars,  she  stopped,  overcome  by  a 
sudden  rush  of  shyness.  Behind  that  last  yard  of  shel 
tering  wall  she  waited  breathless,  while  you  might  count 
seven,  and  then  turned  on  a  noiseless  foot  and  fled  up 
stairs,  bending  low  as  she  passed  the  square  windows,  so 
that  not  even  the  top  of  her  brown  head  should  be  vis 
ible  to  that  very  odd  man  waiting  for  her  down  there  in 
the  hall. 

She  reappeared  ten  minutes  later  with  the  first  batch 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  119 

of  guests,  and  while  they  were  speaking  to  their  hostess, 
the  sunburnt  man  made  his  way  to  Bella,  and  held  out 
his  hand. 

"It  took  you  a  long  time,"  he  said.  "How  did  you 
manage  it?" 

"Manage  what?" 

"Getting  down.  You  're  the  cleverest  picture  I  ever 
saw  on  any  wall.  How  long  do  they  give  you  1 ' ' 

"Out  of  the  frame?"  she  said,  catching  up  his  fancy 
with  a  laugh.  "Oh,  only  long  enough  to  find  out  what 
you  've  done  to  make  you  the  special  person  you  say  you 
are." 

"It  's  not  what  I  have  done,  but  what  I  shall  do." 

"Well,  I  'm  very  much  disappointed.  I  thought  you 
must  be  distinguished,  and  now  I  see  you  're  only  con 
ceited." 

He  smiled— he  was  rather  wonderful  when  he  smiled. 

"Of  course,  I  know  perfectly  well  we  've  met  before," 
Bella  went  on,  "but  I  don't  remember  who  you  are." 

"I  '11  tell  you  some  day." 

' '  Some  day  ?    How  absurd.    Why  not  now  ? ' ' 

"Because  the  surprise  might  be  too  great." 

She  opened  her  eyes  yet  wider  and  laughed  as  a  girl 
will  in  recognition  of  a  point  she  sees  as  yet  only  with 
the  eye  of  faith.  "Did  n't  you  promise  you  'd  tell  me 
if  I  came  down  ? ' ' 

"But  you  have  n't  come  down.  You  are  still  far  out 
of  reach. ' ' 

"It  's  ridiculous  of  you  not  to  tell  me  your  name. ' ' 

"My  name  would  n't  mean  anything  to  you— not  yet. 
You  would  n  't  know  it. ' ' 

' '  What ! "    She  drew  back. 


120  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"But  we  have  met,"  he  reassured  her  hurriedly. 

"I  felt  we  must  have,  but  where  was  it?" 

"I  can't  quite  remember,  either.  It  may  have  been 
when  you  were  Queen  in  Babylon  and  I  was  a  Christian 
slave. ' ' 

She  drew  nearer  with  lit  face.  "Oh,  do  you  believe 
in  all  those  delightful  things?" 

"I  believe—  "  he  began  on  a  different  and  lower  note 
and  then  he  stopped  suddenly.  Bella's  upturned  face 
silently  begged  him  to  go  on  with  his  profession  of  faith. 

But  just  then,  Bella's  brother,  having  passed  a  boring 
guest  on  to  his  wife,  came  between  the  two  who  stood 
so  oblivious  of  the  rest  of  the  company.  The  apparition 
of  Tom  Wayne  brought  Bella  back  to  the  every-day 
world,  and  to  a  half-frightened  self-criticism,  in  view  of 
the  long  flight  she  had  taken  from  it  in  the  last  few  sec 
onds. 

Her  brother  laid  an  affectionate  hand  on  the  shoulder 
of  the  sunburnt  man,  and  said,  laughing,  to  Bella:  "You 
must  be  careful  with  this  person.  He  's  the  most  des 
perate  flirt. ' ' 

Bella  winced  inwardly,  but  she  disguised  the  little 
hurt  with  smiling  mockery.  "Really!  I  should  never 
have  thought  it ! " 

"Oh,  yes,  goes  off  with  first  one  heart  and  then  an 
other.  And  he  goes  so  far !  That  's  the  worst  of  him. ' ' 

"Where  does  he  go?" 

"Lord  knows!  Let  's  see,  what  God-forgotten  place 
was  the  last  book  about  ? ' ' 

' l  Oh,  you  write  books  ?  Then  you  are  distinguished— 

"You  are  n't  telling  me  you  did  n't  know  who  it 
was  ? ' '  exclaimed  her  brother. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  121 

' '  Well,  I  thought  I  did,  and  I  Ve  been  behaving  as  if  I 
did." 

There  was  a  general  movement  to  the  dining-room, 
but  Tom  paused  long  enough  to  say  with  mock  formal 
ity:  "Miss  Wayne,  Mr.  John  Galbraith." 

"Ok!"  ejaculated  the  girl,  growing  pink  with  excite 
ment.  * '  Are  you  Hildegarde  's  Jack  ? ' ' 

The  sunburnt  man  looked  mystified  a  moment,  and 
then  with  sudden  daring,  * '  Is  your  name  Hildegarde  ? ' ' 
he  said. 

This  was  on  the  twenty-fourth  of  September.  Six 
days  later  she  began  a  letter  to  her  friend. 

"Oh,  Hildegarde!  Hildegarde!  You  're  quite  right. 
He  's  the  most  wonderful  person  in  the  world,  and  I  hope 
you  don't  mind,  but  we  are  engaged  to  be  married— Jack 
Galbraith  and  I !  It  turns  out  that  he  's  an  old  friend  of 
Marion 's  family,  and  after  she  married  my  brother,  when 
Jack  came  to  see  them  last  winter,  Tom  liked  him  aw 
fully—of  course  everybody  does  that— and  since  then 
they  've  all  three  been  great  friends. 

"And  one  of  the  first  things  he  asked  me  when  he 
heard  Tom  came  from  near  Valdivia,  was  all  about  you— 
I  mean  your  father.  He  says  such  beautiful  things  about 
your  father,  and  how  kind  he  was  when  Jack  was  a  poor, 
forlorn,  little  boy.  But  oh,  Hildegarde !  he  's  the  most 
glorious  person  now  you  ever  saw  in  your  life.  The  old 
faded  photograph  is  n  't  a  bit  like  him.  I  am  sending  you 
a  new  one,  and  that  is  n 't  like  him,  either.  But  I  am  go 
ing  to  get  a  silver  frame  for  it  and  I  shall  be  dreadfully 
hurt  if  you  don't  put  it  on  the  altar-table,  with  the  old 
locket  and  the  roses— if  you  're  really  glad  of  our  happi- 


122  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

ness  you  '11  even  burn  a  joss  now  and  then  for  our  sake. 
I  'm  miserable  when  I  think  how  little  good  any  photo 
graph  of  such  a  person  is !  You  can't  imagine  what  it  's 
like  when  he  smiles.  All  the  whole  earth  smiles,  too.  I 
adore  him  when  he  smiles— and  when  he  does  n  't.  I  adore 
him  every  minute,  except  when  he  talks  about  Franz 
Josef  Land,  or  something  disgusting  like  that.  But  then 
he  does  n't  do  it  much— never,  except  when  Mr.  Borisoff 
is  here.  Mr.  Borisoff  is  a  man  I  can't  stop  to  tell  you 
about,  only  I  don't  like  him,  and  I  shall  let  Jack  know 
some  day  that  I  don 't  think  he  is  a  good  influence. 

"But  I  began  to  say  that  you  must  n't  think  Jack  is 
the  least  solemn  as  his  letters  used  to  sound  and  as  the 
pictures  make  out.  In  fact,  he  began  our  acquaintance 
by  flirting  quite  desperately,  but  he  says  it  was  n't  flirt 
ing  at  all.  He  meant  all  those  things!  He  says  they 
were  a  profession  of  faith  upon  a  miraculous  revelation 
(that  's  me— I  'm  the  miraculous  revelation!),  and  it 
only  sounded  flirtatious  because  I  did  n't  realize,  as  he 
did,  that  we  had  been  waiting  for  one  another. 

"He  's  waited  a  good  deal  longer  that  I  have,  poor 
Jack!  He  's  more  than  twelve  years  older  than  I  am; 
do  you  remember  how  you  used  to  throw  that  in  my  face  1 
But  it  does  n't  matter  the  least  in  the  world.  Besides, 
you  'd  never  think  he  was  so  old— he  's  such  a  darling ; 
and  he  talks  like  a  poet,  and  a  painter,  and  an  archangel, 
all  rolled  into  one.  I  am  so  wildly  happy  I  can't  write 
a  proper  letter,  only  I  do  want  you  to  know  that  your 
mother  is  mistaken,  as  we  always  thought.  Jack  is  a 
saint— simply  a  saint.  When  my  father  behaved  quite 
horridly,  and  said  he  could  n 't  have  me  marrying  a  man 
who  went  away  for  two  or  three  years  on  long,  scientific 
expeditions,  Jack  said  he  would  n't  do  it  any  more, 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  123 

though  I  think  it  cost  him  something  to  say  that.  He 
was  quite  silent  for  hours  afterward,  and  did  n't  even 
notice  I  'd  done  my  hair  differently.  And  that  horrid 
Mr.  Borisoff  was  in  such  a  rage.  He  did  n't  say  any 
thing,  but  oh!  he  looked.  But  now  he  's  gone  away, 
thank  goodness,  and  I  shall  try  to  make  Jack  not  ever 
see  him  again.  Then  another  thing,  just  to  show  you 
what  a  perfect  angel  Jack  is.  My  mother  said  I  was  deli 
cate  and  too  young,  and  things  like  that,  and  she  got 
father  to  agree  that  I  was  only  eighteen  and  was  the 
weakling  of  the  family,  and  they  made  up  their  wicked 
old  minds  that  I  must  n  't  be  married  right  away  as  Jack 
and  I  had  arranged.  And  what  do  you  think?  Jack 
said  he  would  wait  for  me  ?  A  whole  year !  I  cried  when 
they  settled  that,  but  was  n 't  he  a  seraph  ?  Fathers  and 
mothers  are  very  selfish ;  I  shall  not  treat  my  daughters 
like  that. 

' '  How  Jack  and  I  will  ever  get  through  a  year  of  wait 
ing  is  more  than  either  of  us  know.  I  am  not  coming  home 
till  the  first  week  in  December,  and  Jack  's  coming  to  us 
for  Christmas.  And  then  you  '11  see  him !  I  hope  you 
are  pleased  that  I  'm  going  to  marry  the  man  we  've 
talked  so  much  about.  It  seems  like  another  bond, 
does  n 't  it  ?  How  is  Louis  Cheviot  ?  I  can  forgive  him 
now  for  always  liking  you  best.  I  can't  imagine  how  I 
ever  looked  at  him.  Oh,  Hildegarde,  Jack  is  a  perfect- 
well,  I  never  heard  the  word  that  was  beautiful  enough 
to  describe  him. 

' '  Good-by,  I  hear  him  now  out  in  the  garden.  Jack  is 
the  most  perfect  whistler. 

"Your  loving  and  devoted 

"  BELLA." 


CHAPTER  VII 

[ECEMBER   did   not   bring   Galbraith— nor 
even  Bella. 

"Jack  found  he  could  n't  leave  that 
odious  Mr.  Borisoff  to  settle  up  some  busi 
ness  all  alone,  but  my  brother  Tom  has  got 
mama  to  consent  to  stay  over  Christmas  with  me  in  New 
York  at  Marion's.  So  Jack  and  I  shan't  die,  as  we  fully 
intended  to  if  we  were  separated. ' ' 

Just  as  the  girl  and  her  mother,  early  in  the  new  year, 
were  at  last  going  home,  a  cable  came  from  England  to 
say  that  Bella's  sister,  Mrs.  Hilton,  had  been  badly  hurt 
in  a  carriage  accident. 

The  cable  was  couched  in  the  most  alarming  terms— 
there  seemed  to  be  every  prospect  of  three  little  children 
being  left  motherless.  Bella  and  her  mother  took  the  first 
ship  that  sailed. 

"If  we  have  to  stay  any  time,  Jack  says  he  will  come 


They  did  stay,  and  Jack  was  as  good  as  his  word.  Mrs. 
Hilton  did  not  die,  but  she  lay  for  months  in  a  critical 
condition,  and  her  mother  mounted  guard  over  the  new 
baby  and  the  three  other  little  people. 

Bella  meanwhile  was  amusing  herself  right  royally. 

"I  Ve  been  presented  and  I  'm  having  a  perfect,  rap 
turous  time. 


124 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  125 

"And  now  it  's  decided  we  don't  have  to  wait  quite  a 
whole  year— we  are  going  to  be  married  before  we  come 
back  to  America,  some  time  in  the  summer.  Just  think 
of  it,  Hildegarde  !  You  and  I  not  to  meet  again  till  I  'm 
married !  Oh,  do  write  and  say  you  '11  love  me  just  as 
much  as  ever. ' ' 

Then  for  a  time  no  more  long  letters,  but  a  shower  of 
happy  little  notes,  that  descended  with  tolerable  regu 
larity.  After  that,  the  wedding  invitation!  Ten  days' 
interval  and  then  two  communications  by  the  same  mail. 
The  first : 

' '  DEAREST  HILDEGARDE  : 

"Mother  and  I  are  just  back  from  a  week-end  at 
Tryston.  It  was  rather  dull.  All  the  men  were  im 
mensely  distinguished  and  at  least  eighty.  I  was  glad 
to  get  back  to  town.  Hengler's  Circus  has  been  turned 
into  a  skating-rink.  We  all  went  to  a  delightful  party 
there  last  week.  The  wife  of  the  Governor-General  of 
Canada  skated  most  wonderfully.  I  wish  I  could.  Jack 
did  n't  take  his  eyes  off  her.  Mr.  Borisoff  has  come  to 
London.  I  hate  Mr.  Borisoff  as  much  as  ever,  if  not 
worse. 

"I  have  n't  time  for  more  if  I  'm  to  catch  this  post. 
But  I  can't  have  you  thinking  I  forget  you  in  my  happi 
ness.  Besides,  I  shall  be  happier  when  Mr.  Borisoff  goes 
back  to  his  fellow-barbarians,  and  leaves  me  and  Jack 
alone.  The  next,  I  promise,  shall  be  a  great,  long  letter. 
You  '11  see !  I  do  love  you,  Hildegarde. 

' '  From  your  loving 

"BELLA. 

"  P.  S.    I  wish  you  were  here. ' ' 


126  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

It  struck  Hildegarde  it  was  the  first  time  she  had  said 
that  since  Jack  had  appeared  on  the  scene. 

The  other  letter  was  without  date  or  beginning. 

"Jack  and  I  have  quarreled.    Oh,  if  you  were  here ! 

"BELLA." 

Immediately  after,  a  mysterious  cable,  that  told  simply 
the  date  of  Bella's  homeward  sailing.  Had  the  quarrel 
frightened  her  lover  and  so  hastened  on  the  marriage? 
But  no,  for  while  Bella  was  still  upon  the  sea  came  a 
formal  notice  that  the  marriage  was  "postponed."  It 
had  been  mailed  some  days  before  the  cable  was  sent. 

HILDEGARDE 's  first  feeling  upon  Bella's  return  was  that 
since  the  writing  of  that  final  note  from  London,  and  the 
dispatching  of  the  postponement  notice,  the  trouble, 
whatever  it  had  been,  was  patched  up.  Impossible  to 
think  there  was  a  cloud  in  her  sky.  Not  matured  at  all ; 
only  a  little  thinner  and,  save  for  that,  exactly  the  same 
Bella— "unthinking,  idle,  wild,  and  young." 

But  as  the  minutes  went  by  and  she  ran  from  one 
familiar  thing  to  another  in  garden  and  house,  with 
greeting  and  gay  comment,  spinning  out  the  time  till 
she  and  Hildegarde  should  be  alone  together,  the  older 
girl  began  to  have  her  doubts.  Was  Bella  as  happy  as 
she  pretended,  flitting  about  with  all  her  ' '  dear  Mars  ? ' ' 

Nothing  possible  to  gather  from  her  eagerness  to  be 
assured  that  so  far  from  being  forgotten,  she  was  more 
than  ever  an  object  of  interest  and  devotion.  Nothing 
new  Bella's  little  weakness  for  wanting  everybody  to  be 
visibly  enlivened  by  her  return  from  ' '  abroad, ' '  bringing 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  127 

her  adorable  frocks  (for  Bella's  American  mama  had 
come  into  money,  and  Bella  was  helping  her  to  come  out 
of  a  certain  portion),  bringing  remembrances  for  every 
body,  bringing  a  whiff  of  foreign  airs,  and  a  touch  of 
something  exciting,  exotic,  into  the  lives  of  stay-at-home 
folk.  Bella  had  always  been  one  of  those  who,  however 
much  adored,  would  like  to  be  adored  yet  a  little  more. 
She  could  n't  bear  that  any  one  within  reach  of  her  in 
fluence  should  escape  caring  about  her,  and  she  cast  a 
net  uncommon  wide.  It  was  meant  to  enmesh  even 
Hildegarde's  mother,  partly  because  that  lady  was  so 
little  lavish  in  bestowing  her  affection,  but  mostly  be 
cause  if  you  were  much  in  the  Mar  house  it  mattered 
enormously  upon  what  terms  you  were  with  Mrs.  Mar. 
But,  as  ill-luck  would  have  it,  Bella  never  thought  of  the 
lady  once  she  was  away  from  her.  Though  she  had 
brought  back  scarf-pins  for  the  boys,  and  a  silver- 
mounted  blackthorn  for  Mr.  Mar,  and  a  quite  wonderful 
necklace  for  Hildegarde,  there  was  nothing — nothing  at 
all  for  Mrs.  Mar— and  it  was  serious. 

Bella  never  realized  the  awful  omission  till,  having 
dispensed  the  other  gifts,  she  stood  with  the  rest  of  the 
family  in  the  garden,  not  even  asking  where  Mrs.  Mar 
was,  till  looking  up,  she  saw  that  lady  at  her  bedroom 
window  carefully  trying  on  a  new  pair  of  gloves. 
"Everything  depends  on  the  way  they  're  put  on  the 
first  time."  Bella  could  hear  her  saying  it,  and  she 
looked  up  smiling  and  waving  her  hand,  as  much  as  to 
say,  '  *  Oh,  please  hurry  down !  You  're  the  person  I  'm 
pining  most  of  all  to  see  again."  But,  of  herself,  Miss 
Bella  was  silently  asking,  ' '  What  am  I  to  do !  What  will 
happen  if  she  should  see  she  's  the  only  one  I  've  forgot- 


128  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

ten  ? ' '  Bella 's  brain  worked  feverishly.  Glancing  down, 
her  eye  fell  on  a  gold  pencil  she  was  wearing  on  a  chain. 
Surreptitiously  detaching  this  latest  gift  of  her  mother's, 
Bella  slipped  it  in  her  pocket,  talking  all  the  time ;  telling 
Mr.  Mar  what  it  felt  like  to  see  sunshine,  real  Californian 
sunshine  again ;  offering  up  to  public  scorn  the  English 
girl  who  had  disapproved  of  the  unappreciative  Cali- 
f ornians  for  rooting  arum  lilies  out  of  their  gardens,  and 
throwing  them  away  in  sheaves,  which  Bella  admitted 
was  what  they  did  with  the  "pest."  "Just  like  your 
American  extravagance, ' '  the  English  girl  had  said. 

Oh,  it  was  so  perfectly  heavenly  to  be  at  home  again ! 
Bella  beamed  in  her  old  conscienceless  way  at  poor  Trenn, 
who  found  a  heady  tonic— a  hope  new  born,  in  hearing 
the  adored  one  call  the  Mar  house  ' '  home. ' ' 

But  even  while  he  was  savoring  the  sweetness  of  that 
thought,  there  was  the  distracting  creature  linking  her 
arm  in  Harry's,  and  saying:  "Come  away  a  moment 
and  tell  me  something  I  want  to  know." 

What  could  a  boy  like  Harry  possibly  tell  Bella  that 
she  could  want  to  know ! 

Harry's  own  huge  satisfaction  in  the  incident  was 
cruelly  damped  upon  Bella 's  saying :  * '  Does  your  mother 
still  love  stumps  ? ' ' 

"Stumps!  Love  s-stumps!"  he  muttered,  in  amaze 
ment. 

"Yes.  You  have  n't  forgotten  how  she  always  kept 
her  pencils  till  they  were  so  little  nobody  else  could  have 
held  on  to  them. ' ' 

"Oh,  that  kind.    Yes.    Stumps!    I  see." 

"Well,  does  she  dote  on  them  as  much  as  ever?  Does 
she  pick  them  out  of  the  fender,  when  Mr.  Mar  has 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  129 

thrown  his  away?  Does  she  still  say:  'Well,  I  'm  not  so 
well  off  that  I  can  put  a  thing  in  the  fire  that  's  only 
half -used  ? '  Does  she  do  that  the  same  as  ever,  or  are  you 
all  too  rich  now  ? ' ' 

Harry  laughed.  "Oh,  we  '11  never  be  so  rich  that 
mother  won't  use  a  pencil  to  its  last  grasp." 

"Well,  then,  I  've  got  the  very  thing  for  her !  A  nice 
gold  one—pencil,  you  know.  But  rather  a  stump,  too. 
See  ?— just  her  size ! ' ' 

Harry  looked  doubtfully  down  upon  the  somewhat 
massive  pencil-case  which  Bella  had  drawn  from  her 
pocket  and  was  telescoping  in  and  out.  "That  's  an 
awfully  fine  one,  but  I  can't  quite  imagine  mother  giving 
up  her— 

"Well,  look  here,"  interrupted  Bella,  "Mrs.  Mar  V a 
person  you  can't  take  risks  with.  Do  you  mind  going 
up-stairs  and  showing  her  this?  Just  ask  her  what  she 
thinks  of  it— as  though  I  'd  brought  it  to  you,  you 
know."  Harry  departed  on  the  errand,  while  Bella 
returned  to  the  others,  but  her  emissary  was  back  directly 
with  a  doubtful  face,  and  Mrs.  Mar  following  not  far 
behind! 

"Well?"  Bella  demanded  in  an  undertone. 

"Oh— a— I  asked  her  if  she  did  n't  think  it  was  an 
awfully  fine  one,  and  all  she  said  was:  'The  Lord  was 
very  good.  He  had  delivered  her  many  years  ago  from 
gold  pencils. '  ' 

"What  on  earth  does  she  mean?" 

' c  Have  n  't  the  ghost—     'Sh ! " 

"Oh,  how  do  you  do,  dear  Mrs.  Mar!"  Bella  flew  to 
embrace  the  lady,  who  received  the  advance  with  self- 
possession,  but  not  without  a  glint  of  pleasure. 


130  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

Harry  still  stood  with  the  intended  tribute  in  his  hand. 
Mrs.  Mar's  eye  fell  upon  it  critically. 

"Is  it  true— a— you  don't  think  much  of  gold  pen 
cils  V  hazarded  Bella. 

"Oh,  if  you  're  a  person  of  leisure — " 

"What  's  that  got  to  do  with  it?" 

"It  's  a  pursuit  in  itself,  keeping  a  gold  pencil  going. ' ' 

"Oh,  no.  Look.  This  one  goes  beautifully."  Bella 
took  it  from  Harry  and  shot  it  in  and  out. 

* '  That  's  just  its  wiliness.    Wait  till  you  need  it. ' ' 

' '  Really  this  one  's  very  good.    It  's  warranted— 

"I  'II  warrant  it  '11  always  be  wanting  a  new  lead. 
Especially  at  the  moment  when  you  can't  possibly  stop 
to  niggle  about  with  fitting  one  in.  Then  you  '11  put  the 
thing  away  till  you  can  take  an  afternoon  off  just  to 
get  your  handsome  gold  pencil  into  working  order  again. 
And  when  you  Ve  done  that  and  gone  thoroughly  into 
the  subject,  you  '11  find  there  is  n't  a  store  on  the  Pacific 
coast  that  keeps  your  size  leads.  No  lead  in  any  store 
will  ever  fit  your  pencil.  Then  you  '11  write  to  New 
York  to  a  manufactory.  Then  you  '11  wait  a  month, 
maybe  two.  Then,  by  the  time  you  've  got  them,  you  '11 
find  the  pencil  has  forgotten  how  to  assimilate  leads.  It 
will  break  them  off  short  and  spit  them  out.  If  you  try 
to  discipline  the  pencil,  it  '11  turn  sulky  and  refuse  to 
open.  Or  it  stays  open  and  refuses  to  shut. ' ' 

"I  assure  you,  Mrs.  Mar,  this  one— 

"And  I  assure  you,  Miss  Bella  Wayne,  that  even  if 
you  're  under  the  special  favor  of  Providence,  and  none 
of  these  things  happen,  you  '11  still  find  you  can  never 
get  the  work  out  of  a  twenty-dollar  gold  pencil  that  you 
can  out  of  a  five-cent  cedar. ' ' 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  131 

Bella  was  catching  Harry's  eye  and  trying  not  to 
laugh. 

"And  remember  what  I  tell  you,"  Mrs.  Mar  wound 
up,  "you  '11  have  to  treat  that  gold  pencil  as  you  treat 
Mrs.  Harrington  Trennor,  with  reverence  and  awe.  If  you 
don't  you  '11  be  sorry.  If  you  lean  on  it,  it  will  collapse. 
If  you  do  anything  but  admire  it,  it  will  teach  you  bet 
ter.  ' '  Bella  opened  her  lips— Mrs.  Mar  stopped  her  with, 
"Unless  you  come  to  my  way  of  thinking,  you  '11  use 
that  pencil  in  fear  and  trembling  till  the  merciful  grave 
offers  you  a  refuge  from  your  slavery.  As  I  told  Harry ' ' 
—she  buttoned  the  last  button  on  her  new  gloves  (why 
had  n't  Bella  brought  her  anything  as  sensible  as 
gloves ! )  and  she  drew  down  her  cuff  with  a  business-like 
air— "the  Lord  has  delivered  me  from  many  snares;  gold 
pencils  among  the  rest ! ' '  And  she  marched  off  toward 
the  gate. 

"Oh,  mother,"  said  Hildegarde,  at  her  side,  "how 
could  you !  That  dear  little  Bella  brought  the  beautiful 
gold  pencil  for  you  all  the  way  from  Europe. ' ' 

"Do  you  suppose  I  did  n't  guess  that?  Good-by!" 
She  looked  back  and  nodded  to  Bella.  "I  Ve  got  to  go  to 
the  missionary  meeting  now,  but  I  '11  see  you  at  supper. ' ' 

"Oh,  and  you  '11  tell  me  the  rest  then?"  asked  the 
wicked  Bella,  with  an  innocent  look. 

' '  The  rest ! ' '  Mrs.  Mar  glanced  sharply  over  her  shoul 
der  as  she  laid  her  hand  on  the  latch  of  the  gate.  ' '  There 
is  no  rest  for  anybody  who  depends  on  a  contrivance  like 
that.  Whenever  I  see  a  person  with  a  gold  pencil,  I 
know  it  won't  be  long  before  she  's  asking  me  to  lend 
her  my  wooden  stump.  As  a  rule  she  likes  my  wooden 
stump  so  well  she  walks  off  with  it." 


132  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

As  Mrs.  Mar  vanished  round  the  corner,  Bella  gave 
way  to  suppressed  chuckles.  Impossible  to  think  she 
had  a  care  in  the  world  greater  than  a  rejected  gold 
pencil. 

'  *  Yes,  Hildegarde.  I  'm  coming  directly ;  only  Trenn 
has  n  't  given  me  a  spray  of  lemon  verbena  yet,  to  console 
me  for  the  scandalous  way  his  mother  treats  me.  Don't 
you  remember  you  always  give  me  lemon  verbena  when 
we  're  in  the  garden  ? ' '  She  showed  no  impatience  when 
Trenn  prolonged  the  time-honored  process — not  a  bit  of 
it,  went  on  laughing  and  chattering  there  in  the  sunshine 
and  telling  how  they  thought  in  England  that  the  Ameri 
can  girl  was  only  keeping  up  the  transatlantic  reputation 
for  " telling  tall  stories,"  when  Bella  had  said  that  ver 
bena  at  home  was  a  tree,  and  grew  to  the  second-story 
window.  Then  having  undone  in  half  an  hour  any  good 
of  peace  regained  by  the  "Mar  boys"  through  her  ab 
sence  and  engagement,  Miss  Bella  found  her  way  up 
stairs. 

Her  vivacity  fell  visibly  from  the  moment  she  crossed 
the  threshold  of  Hildegarde 's  familiar  little  room.  But 
she  commented  favorably  upon  the  new  home-worked 
counterpane,  and  then,  as  though  without  seeing  it, 
walked  past  the  familiar  old  altar-table,  with  its  ferny 
background  and  the  roses  ranged  below.  There  was  the 
big  silver  locket  hung  above,  like  some  peasant's  votive 
offering  at  a  foreign  shrine,  and  down  there  in  front 
of  the  massed  roses  was  that  other  picture,  that  had 
been  new  only  a  year  ago,  when  Bella's  happiness  was 
born. 

She  went  straight  to  the  window  and  stood  quite  silent, 
looking  down  upon  Hildegarde 's  flower  borders.  Then 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  133 

without  turning  round,  "Will  you  do  something  for 
me?" 

"What?" 

"Take  that  picture  away.    The  locket,  too." 

' '  Oh,  Bella !    Is  it  as  bad  as  that  ¥ ' ' 

"You  '11  put  them  out  of  sight?" 

' '  Yes,  yes ;  of  course  I  will. ' ' 

"Now!"  She  might  as  well  have  said:  I  won't  turn 
round  until  they  're  gone. 

Hildegarde  opened  a  drawer.  "I  '11  put  them  in  here 
till  things  come  right  again." 

' '  Things  are  n  't  ever  coming  right. ' ' 

"Bella!" 

Not  till  she  heard  the  drawer  shut  did  the  girl  turn 
from  the  window,  and  Hildegarde  could  see  that  the 
small  face  was  quivering. 

' '  Bella,  dear ! ' '  Her  friend  swept  to  her  on  a  sudden 
wave  of  pity.  ' i  It  will  all  come  right. ' ' 

But  the  younger  girl  drew  back.  Although  her  tears 
were  brimming  she  spoke  with  a  certain  half-choked 
hardness:  "I  Ve  hurried  mother  back  as  fast  as  boats 
and  trains  could  bring  us ;  just  to  be  with  you  again,  but 
not  to  hear  you  say  that.  I  wanted  to  be  with  you  just 
because  you  will  know  better.  Hildegarde— I— I  'd  like 
to  stay  with  you  awhile.  May  1 1 " 

"I  want  nothing  so  much— we  all  want  you." 

' '  Trenn,  too  ? ' '  she  actually  laughed  through  her  tears. 
What  a  queer  creature. 

"Trenn,  too.  Only"— Hildegarde  glanced  from  the 
empty  place  on  the  altar-table,  to  the  shut  drawer— 
"only  you  '11  be  kind  enough  not  to  break  Trenn 's  heart 
as  well." 


134  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

'  *  As  well  as  my  own  ? ' ' 

Hildegarde 's  face  grew  hard  with  the  words,  "As 
well  as  Jack  Galbraith  's. ' ' 

Bella,  too,  was  grave  enough  now;  "I  have  n't  broken 
his  heart.  But— I  've  got  a  crack  in  my  own.  Only"— 
she  lifted  her  pretty  eyes  with  an  air  almost  of  panic— 
"only  nobody  else  is  to  know.  You"— she  came  nearer 
and  laid  a  nervous  hand  on  Hildegarde's  firm  arm— 
"you  must  help  me  to  keep  everybody  from  know 
ing." 

"Dear,"  was  all  Hildegarde's  answer,  but  she  leaned 
her  cheek  against  Bella 's  thin  face. 

"And  there  's  another  thing, ' '  the  younger  girl  went  on 
a  little  feverishly,  still  clinging  to  Hildegarde  's  arm,  ' '  I 
hate  talking  about  it. ' ' 

' '  Of  course.    Just  at  first,  it  must  be— ' ' 

"No,  it  is  n't  'of  course'  and  it  's  not  only  at  first. 
It  's  for  always.  Most  girls  talk  their  love  affairs  to  tat 
ters.  I  've  noticed  that.  I  want  you  to  help  me  to— to 
keep  my-  Her  voice  went  out  upon  a  sudden  flood  of 
tears.  Hildegarde  drew  her  into  the  window-seat  and  sat 
down  beside  her.  They  were  silent  for  a  time,  until  Bella 
laid  her  wet  face  down  on  her  friend's  shoulder  with, 
"Mind,  Hildegarde!  We  are  n't  to  talk  about  it.  Not 
even  you  and  I.  John  Galbraith  is  too— too— "  She 
raised  her  head,  drew  her  small  hand  across  her  eyes, 
and  then  sprang  up  and  faced  the  window,  as  if  some 
enemy  without  had  challenged  her.  "It  may  be  that  I 
don't  understand  what  a  great  man  he  is,  as  Mr.  Borisoff 
says.  But,  at  least,  I  know  he  's  not  the  sort  of  person  to 
be  chattered  over. ' ' 

Hildegarde  remembered  with  a  sting  how  for  years  she 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  135 

had  "chattered"  with  Galbraith  for  her  theme.  And 
she  had  n't  little  Bella's  excuse.  Yes,  it  was  always  like 
this.  She  was  for  ever  stumbling  upon  something  dig 
nified  and  fine  in  Butterfly  Bella. 

The  pretty  tear-stained  face  was  lifted  to  the  sunlight, 
and  the  childish  red  mouth,  so  used  to  laughter,  was  piti 
fully  grave,  as  Bella,  staring  up  into  the  square  of  sky 
over  Hildegarde's  head  said :  "He  is  up  there !" 

1  i  Jack ! ' '    Hildegarde  exclaimed  in  a  half -whisper. 

"John  Galbraith,"  said  Bella.  "He  is  way  up  there, 
and  I  won 't  be  the  one  to  pull  him  down. ' ' 

'  *  Oh-h.    I  was  half  afraid  you  meant  he  was  dead. ' ' 

1  ( As  good  as  dead. ' ' 

Fear  took  fresh  hold  on  the  older  girl.  He  is  going  to 
marry  some  one  else,  Hildegarde  said  to  herself.  Yes, 
yes ;  as  she  looked  at  poor  Bella 's  face,  she  was  sure  of  it. 
And  now  the  slim  little  figure  had  sunk  on  its  knees.  She 
leaned  against  her  friend  for  support.  But  she  looked 
out  across  Hildegarde's  shoulder,  searching  space 
through  tears.  Hildegarde  held  tight  the  childish-look 
ing  hands,  and  asked  the  last  question  she  was  ever  to 
put  about  the  common  hero  of  their  girlhood.  "Where 
is  he  ? "  she  said. 

"He  's  gone  off  with  Mr.  Borisoff  somewhere." 

' '  You  mean  you  don 't  know  where  ? ' ' 

' '  Somewhere  in  the  arctic. ' '  She  hid  her  face  in  Hil 
degarde 's  lap. 

They  sat  so  a  long,  long  time. 

IN  spite  of  her  year's  absence,  Bella  found  nothing  much 
changed  in  the  Valdivia  situation,  except  that  the  Mar 
boys  had  '  *  got  on ' '  more  than  ever,  and  that  their  father 's 


136  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

form  of  progress  seemed  still  more  strikingly  to  consist 
in  *  *  getting  on  "  in  years. 

It  was  a  long  time  since  his  wife  had  given  him  the  credit 
for  doing  more  than  his  share  at  the  bank  with  a  view  to 
promotion  to  be  head  cashier,  or  even  a  ' '  silent  partner. ' ' 
Each  time  a  vacancy  occurred  some  one  else  had  stepped 
into  it ;  Louis  Cheviot  had  been  the  last.  But  Mrs.  Mar 
learned  through  the  years  that  the  reason  her  husband 
accepted  increased  tasks  was  that  he  was  born  to  bear 
burdens,  as  the  sparks  to  fly  upward.  If  any  extra  work 
was  "going,"  so  to  speak,  it  gravitated  unerringly  to 
Nathaniel  Mar.  As  to  the  question  of  his  reward,  what 
would  be  gained  by  giving  a  better  position  to  a  man  who 
in  any  crisis  could  be  depended  on  to  do  all  the  work  of  a 
higher  office,  and  never  ask  for  increased  emolument? 
The  only  person  who  ever  hinted  such  a  thing  to  the 
Trennors  had  been  Cousin  Harriet.  The  Trennor  Broth 
ers'  success  (which  was  proverbial  in  Valdivia)  had  long 
extended  to  avoidance  of  Cousin  Harriet.  Certainly  Mr. 
Mar's  life-long  ill-luck  brought  out  more  clearly  the  fact 
of  his  boys'  early  prosperity.  Not  that  it  was  enormous 
as  yet,  though  quite  sufficient  to  have  enabled  them  to 
marry,  had  they  so  chosen. 

Mrs.  Mar's  satisfaction  in  her  sons  was  checkered  by 
the  fact  that  each  of  these  otherwise  reasonable  and  en 
terprising  young  men  clung  to  his  boyish  infatuation  for 
Bella  Wayne,  long  after  their  boyhood  had  gone  the  way 
of  the  years.  It  certainly  did  seem  as  though  not  till 
one  or  both  were  cut  out  by  her  marrying  some  one  else, 
would  either  Trenn  or  Harry  look  at  any  of  the  girls 
Mrs.  Mar  considered  more  desirable.  Not  that  the  boys' 
mother  had  been  able  wholly  to  escape  the  general  Mar 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  137 

devotion  to  the  disturber  of  their  peace,  but  as  the  sea 
sons  passed,  and  Bella  rejected  one  swain  after  another, 
it  became  increasingly  vexatious  to  Mrs.  Mar  that  her 
sons  should  not  realize  and  amend  the  stupidity  of  caring 
about  a  girl  who  was  more  and  more  under  suspicion  of 
being  handicapped  by  a  silly  passion  for  a  mad  fool  who 
had  given  up  the  substance  for  the  shadow,  and  had  met 
his  due  reward— being  now  these  many  months  lost  in 

the  arctic  ice. 

i 

HILDEGARDE 's  theory  that  since  the  unhappy  issue  of  the 
love  affair,  Bella  had  greater  need  of  her  friend  than 
ever  before,  and  Hildegarde 's  own  consequent  inaccessi 
bility  to  others  was  the  cause  of  some  restiveness  on  Che 
viot 's  part.  His  old  friendliness  for  Bella  had  vanished. 
He  spoke  of  her  with  a  humorous  disparagement  that  did 
him  ill-service  with  Hildegarde.  But  he  was  grave 
enough  sometimes. 

"I  never  get  a  word  alone  with  you,  nowadays,"  he 
said  one  night,  as  he  sat  smoking  on  the  steps  of  the 
porch  at  Hildegarde 's  feet,  while  Bella  walked  about  the 
garden  with  Trenn.  Hildegarde  made  some  perfunctory 
answer,  and  they  sat  silent  for  a  time. 

The  light  wind  brought  up  waves  of  fragrance  from 
the  tangle  of  roses  under  Hildegarde 's  window,  and  the 
little  path  stretched  away  to  indefiniteness  in  the  star 
light,  till  it  was  lost  long  before  it  reached  the  garden's 
end.  The  limits  of  the  narrow  inclosure,  so  sharply 
drawn  by  day,  were  nobly  enlarged,  lost  even,  at  this 
hour,  in  the  dim  reaches  of  green  turned  silver  and 
black,  as  the  moon  came  over  the  tops  of  the  conifers. 

Down  by  the  arbor  vita?  hedge  growing  things  that 


138  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

Hildegarde  had  planted  sent  their  souls  to  her  across  the 
lawn,  piercing  the  heavier  air  of  roses  with  arrowy 
shafts  of  spicy  sweetness. 

On  such  a  night  no  one  is  alone.  Where  two  go  down 
a  darkling  walk,  or  sit  on  the  steps  in  the  dusk,  others 
gather  round  them.  Invisible  presences— the  singers, 
the  beautiful  ones,  the  stern  doers  of  great  deeds— join 
us  common  folk,  and  give  us  a  share  in  their  glory  or 
their  steadfast  pain.  Hopes  of  our  own,  that  look  too 
large  by  day— too  dim  and  inaccessible,  they  come 
walking  in  our  garden  at  such  an  hour,  beckoning  us  or 
looking,  smiling,  on.  Living  men,  rumored  to  be  far 
away,  suddenly  stand  before  us.  Women  who  have  been 
long  aloof  draw  near.  All  the  barriers  go  down.  Even 
the  dead  come  home. 

John  Galbraith  was  down  there,  where  Bella's  white 
gown  shone  among  the  trees,  and  John  Galbraith  was 
sitting  between  those  other  two  on  the  steps. 

And  Cheviot  knew  it. 

Hildegarde  was  reminded  of  the  visible  presence  by 
his  saying,  in  a  low  voice,  that  he  understood  the  reason 
of  his  ill-success  with  her. 

"What  do  you  mean?" 

"Oh,  Bella  told  me.  Years  ago.  When  she  was  so 
little  you  thought  she— 

" Told  you  what?" 

'  *  That  you  had  been  in  love  with  John  Galbraith  since 
you  were  sixteen. ' ' 

"But  you  must  see  that  's  absurd.  I  've  never  even 
seen  him ! ' ' 

"I  wish  to  God  you  had!  Then  you  might  get  over 
it" 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  139 

Hildegarde  roused  herself  to  say  with  equal  emphasis, 
''You  are  really  talking  the  greatest  foolishness — ' 

"Have  n't  you  got  his  picture  in  your  room  this  mo 
ment?" 

"I  have  the  picture  he— had  taken  for  Bella." 

"Before  he  ever  met  Bella  you  had  a  picture  of  Gal- 
braith.  You  used  to  wear  it.  Bella  said— 

"You  seem  to  forget  you  're  talking  about  what  hap 
pened  when  I  was  a  little  school-girl,  and  about  an  old— 
a  very  old  friend  of  my  family.  We  all  have  pictures 
of  Mr.  Galbraith— and,  why,  there  's  one  of  you  there, 
too." 

"On  the  altar?" 

(Oh,  Bella!  Bella!  How  could  you!)  "The  one  on 
the  flower-table  was  put  there  because  Bella  asked  me  to. 
It  's  not  there  any  more.  And  while  it  was,  I  looked 
upon  it  as  the  future  husband  of  my  dearest  friend. ' ' 

But  the  description  of  Bella  sounded  suddenly  ironic. 
It  hurt.  For  Cheviot  was  the  man  who  all  along  had 
laughed  at  girls'  friendships,  and  all  along  he  had 
known  that  Bella  was  capable  of — 

"  It  is  n  't  that  I  could  n  't  forgive  you  for  not  being  in 
love  with  me,"  he  said.  "But  for  being  in  love  with  a 
photograph  and  a  packet  of  letters— no!  that  was  n't 
easy.  At  the  same  time  I  knew  well  enough  that  if  your 
life  had  n't  been  so  narrow,  you  would  n't  have  been  so 
at  the  mercy  of  this  one  romantic  figure  in  it.  If  you  'd 
been  able  to  travel,  or  even  to  go  to  the  university— if 
you  'd  had  any  other  door  open,  you  would  n't  have 
looked  so  long  out  of  that  one  window. ' ' 

A  scrap  of  one  of  Mrs.  Browning's  letters  flew  across 
her  mind— the  dearer  somehow  for  being  a  little  inco- 


140  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

herent,  not  fitted  together  at  all,  yet  finely  consequent 
to  the  inner  spirit— those  words :  ' '  The  pleasantest  place 
in  the  house  is  the  leaning  out  of  the  window." 

Ah,  it  was  very  true  of  the  Mar  house. 

"And  your  mother,"  Cheviot  went  on,  "always  ready 
to  puncture  any  home-blown  bubble  with  the  needle  of 
her  wit ;  mercilessly  critical,  for  fear  her  children  should 
have  too  low  standards;  ready  to  flay  anybody  alive  in 
the  cause  of  education.  Never  letting  you  rest  satisfied 
for  a  moment  with  the  attainable— you  must  always  be 
reaching  out — reaching  out — and  when  you  reached  out 
you  touched  Galbraith." 

How  strangely  well  he  knew— this  man.  It  was  odd, 
but  she  could  never  again  think  him  obtuse,  at  any  rate. 
That  comfort  was  gone. 

"I  was  even  sorry  for  you  while  the  engagement 
lasted,"  the  low  voice  went  on,  unmindful  of  the  uneasy 
stir  of  the  figure  sitting  above  him  in  the  dusk.  He  took 
the  half -smoked  cigar  from  his  lips  and  laid  it  by  the 
pillar.  Over  the  edge  of  the  porch  the  tip  shone  red. 
' '  I  saw  how  hard  it  was  for  you ;  you  had  been  weaving 
romances  round  Galbraith  for  years— you  had  looked 
upon  him  for  so  long  as  your  special  property—  '  Hilde- 
garde  drew  back  into  the  deeper  shadow.  But  by  his 
own  suffering  urged  to  win  a  companion  in  pain,  he  per 
sisted  :  ' '  And  you  thought  if  it  had  been  you  he  had  met, 
it  would  have  been  you  that  he—  Hildegarde's  skirts 
rustled  as  if  she  were  getting  up— "Look  here,  I  've  told 
you  before  you  Ve  got  a  genius  for  truth— I  'm  treating 
you  on  that  basis."  She  said  nothing,  but  she  sat  still. 
1 '  There  was  a  moment, ' '  Cheviot 's  voice  was  unnaturally 
low,  "last  spring,  when  I  knew  I  was  gaining  ground 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  141 

with  you.  It  was  the  day  I  came  back  from  Mexico.  I 
came  here  straight  from  the  station,  and  you— you— 
She  heard  him  strike  his  hands  suddenly  together  in  the 
dusk,  and  a  curious  excitement  took  hold  of  her.  ' '  When 
I  went  home,  I  found  the  invitation  to  Bella's  wedding. 
It  had  been  lying  there  for  days.  Then  I  understood. 
You  had  had  all  those  days  and  nights  to  get  accus 
tomed  to  realizing  it  was  the  end  of  the  old — where  are 
you  going  ?  Can 't  you  even  bear  to  have  me  speak  of  it 
this  once  ! ' ' 

The  white  figure  was  still  again. 

"Oh,  I  understood!"  He  picked  up  the  cigar  again. 
"I  felt  just  the  same  as  you  did.  I  knew  the  ghost  that 
had  stood  so  long  between  us  was  suddenly  gone.  He 
had  moved  out  of  the  way,  and  you  could  see  that  I  was 
there.  For  those  next  days  you  were — you  were —  I 
was  full  of  hope.  Then  came  word  that  Bella  had  broken 
her  engagement. ' ' 

* '  No,  that  the  marriage  was  postponed. ' ' 

He  waited  a  moment,  seemed  about  to  speak,  and 
then,  instead  of  saying  anything,  with  a  sharp  movement 
he  threw  his  half -smoked  cigar  across  the  whitening  sil 
ver  of  the  path  into  the  inky  blotch  the  shrubbery  made. 
Hildegarde's  eyes  followed  the  flying  red  light  till, 
against  a  tree  trunk,  it  fell  in  a  splash  of  sparks,  and  was 
swallowed  up  in  shadow. 

"I  shan't  forget,"  Cheviot  went  on,  still  on  that  low 
restrained  note,  ' '  the  look  in  your  face  as  you  said :  '  I 
never  thought  they  were  suited  to  one  another.  It  would 
never  have  done. '  : 

"Did  I  say  that?" 

"Yes,  and  I  looked  up  and  I  saw  the  ghost  was  there 


142  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

again,  and  presently  I  saw  he  was  n  't  a  ghost  any  longer, 
but  a  real  man.  An  active  expectation  on  your  part— 

' '  No,  no. ' '    The  voice  was  less  denial  than  beseeching. 

"Yes,  a  plan." 

The  hands  that  were  gripping  the  wicker  chair  pulled 
her  quickly  to  her  feet.  * '  Bella ! ' '  she  called  to  the  white 
nicker  by  the  dial.  "It  's  getting  late!" 

Cheviot  stood  up,  too.  ' '  On  your  honor,  Hilde- 
garde— "  Was  it  the  moonlight  blanched  her,  or  was 
she  indeed  so  white?  His  heart  smote  him— but,  "On 
your  honor  can  you  deny  it  ? "  he  demanded. 

"No,"  she  said,  with  sudden  passion;  "I  don't  deny 
it. ' '  And  while  her  words  should  have  steeled  him,  her 
voice  brought  a  lump  to  his  throat. 

"You  mean,"  he  asked,  huskily,  "to  wait  till  John 
Galbraith  comes  back?" 

' '  I  know  it  's  quite  mad— but  there !  A  thing  can  take 
you  like  that.  You  can't  change." 


CHAPTER  VIII 

fITH  the  precision  of  clockwork,  every  day  of 
his  life  but  Sundays,  Nathaniel  Mar  walked 
down  the  main  street  of  Valdivia  to  the 
bank.  People  who  lived  out  of  sight  of  the 
City  Hall  timepiece,  set  their  watches  by 
the  appearance  of  the  lame  man  with  the  stick.  He  never 
varied  the  route,  any  more  than  he  altered  his  time,  and 
both  had  been  exactly  the  same  for  twenty-eight  years. 

The  other  bank  cashiers  (few  of  them  over  thirty) 
said  that,  in  their  opinion,  Mr.  Mar  had  hung  on  quite 
long  enough.  They  did  not  hesitate  to  add  that  his  post 
would  have  fallen  to  a  younger  man  years  ago  had  Mar 
not  been  "a  sort  of  relation."  Even  so  it  was  pretty 
steep  that  an  old  codger  of  sixty  should  be  blocking  up 
the  way  like  that.  A  bank  was  no  place  for  the  super 
annuated,  unless,  of  course,  a  man  was  a  director. 

So  acute  was  the  hearing  of  the  old  codger  (who  was 
not  yet  sixty)  that  sotto-voce  observations  of  this  sort 
had,  from  time  to  time,  reached  his  ears. 

He  saw  all  about  him  men,  younger  than  himself, 
turned  out  of  positions  they  had  occupied,  with  useful 
ness  and  integrity,  for  years,  and  for  no  other  reason 
than  to  make  way  for  some  ' '  boy ' '  in  his  early  twenties. 
Men  of  his  own  standing  had  from  time  to  time  in  the 
past  decade  raged  hopelessly  against  this  tendency  in  a 

143 


144  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

nation,  where  the  great  god,  Efficiency,  demands  the  fine 
flower  of  each  man's  life,  and  looks  with  disfavor  upon 
lined  faces  and  whitening  hair,  even  when  the  capacity 
for  service  is  unimpaired.  It  is  part  of  the  doctrine  of 
"show  me."  There  being  any  good,  or  any  force  not 
capable  of  being  "  shown  "—well,  it  was  doubtful.  Best 
not  take  chances. 

Mar  had  sympathized  with  his  contemporaries  for  be 
ing  elbowed  out  of  their  places,  but  he  had  smiled  at  one 
or  two  who  had  suffered  the  common  fate  of  the  Ameri 
can  clerk,  in  spite  of  having  dyed  their  hair,  and  worn 
jaunty  pince-nez  instead  of  "good  honest  spectacles." 
Nevertheless,  Mar's  own  secret  uneasiness— not  being 
assuaged  by  hair  dye  or  dissipated  by  pince-nez— took 
the  form  of  making  him  the  more  ready  to  be  the  Tren- 
nor  Brothers'  pack-horse,  unconsciously  the  more  eager 
to  oblige  any  and  everybody  at  the  bank,  to  "show" 
from  Monday  morning  to  Saturday  afternoon  how  indis 
pensable  he  was.  He  knew  they  could  get  no  one  to  do 
what  he  did  with  the  same  care  and  assiduity  for  the 
same  salary.  His  astonishment  was,  therefore,  hardly 
less  than  his  chagrin,  when  he  found  upon  his  desk,  one 
morning,  a  letter  from  the  firm  "terminating  their  long 
and  pleasant  connection  upon  the  usual  notice. ' ' 

In  the  bitterness  of  that  hour  he  felt  that  nothing  he 
ever  had  suffered  before  had  mattered  so  vitally.  As 
long  as  a  man  has  work  he  can  bear  trouble  and  disap 
pointment—life  without  work— it  was  something  not  to 
be  faced.  For  the  work,  little  by  little,  had  devoured 
everything  else,  narrowed  down  his  friendships,  cut  off 
his  recreations,  produced  a  brain-fag  that  made  him  unfit 
even  for  reading  anything  but  newspapers. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  145 

He  set  instantly  about  finding  another  post.  The  story 
of  the  days  that  followed— the  writing  to  and  interview 
ing  whippersnapper  young  managers  of  flourishing  con 
cerns,  and  of  being  more  or  less  cavalierly  ''turned 
down,"  as  the  slang  phrase  went— it  would  make  a  book 
of  itself;  a  tragic  and  significant  book  to  boot,  and  one 
essentially  "American." 

The  Mar  boys  behaved  very  well.  They,  at  least,  were 
not  surprised.  They  had,  in  point  of  fact,  expected  the 
occurrence  long  before. 

What  they  had  not  expected  was  that  the  old  man 
"would  take  it  so  mighty  hard. ' '  Why,  he  could  scarcely 
be  more  cut  up  if  he  were  alone  in  the  world— dependent 
entirely  upon  his  own  exertions— instead  of  having  two 
fine  go-ahead  sons,  who  were  getting  on  in  life  so  rapidly 
that  it  really  was  n't  a  matter  of  vital  importance 
whether  the  old  man  did  anything  or  not ;  for  they  had 
every  intention  of  being  good  to  their  father. 

They  told  him  so.  And  he  had  not  shown  himself 
grateful.  And  still  they  meant  to  be  "good"  to  him. 
They  were  '  *  mighty  nice  young  men. ' ' 

NATHANIEL  MAR  saw  clearly  by  the  time  the  "notice" 
was  up,  that  he  lagged  superfluous.  There  was  no  open 
ing  for  him  anywhere. 

The  first  morning  that  he  had  no  right  to  go  down  to 
the  bank  was  one  of  the  most  difficult  he  had  known.  He 
went  out  just  the  same,  at  precisely  the  same  moment, 
and  came  in  at  the  usual  time.  No  one  knew  where  he 
had  spent  those  hours,  but  he  looked  tired  and  ill  when 
he  sat  down  to  the  midday  meal.  After  it  was  over,  he 
said  he  thought  he  would  "go  up  and  lie  down."  He 
10 


146  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

had  never  done  such  a  thing  before  in  his  life,  at  that 
hour  of  the  day.  The  following  mornings  he  spent  at  his 
writing-table  in  the  dining-room,  and  although  there 
were  no  screaming  children  there  now,  and  the  room 
was  bright  and  pretty,  he  sat  miserably,  day  after  day, 
turning  over  old  letters  and  papers,  till  in  despair  he 
would  get  up  and  take  down  a  book  to  read.  But  his 
thoughts  were  all  '  *  down  at  the  bank. ' ' 

Mrs.  Mar  dashed  in  and  out,  called  brisk  directions  to 
the  Chinaman,  who  presided  now  in  the  kitchen,  and 
when  there  was  nothing  else  to  do,  she  would  fly  at  the 
sewing-machine.  This  appeared  to  be  the  kind  of 
mechanism  which  was  worked  with  the  whole  human 
body.  The  hands  traveling  briskly  along  with  the  mov 
ing  seam,  head  going  like  a  mandarin's,  knees  up,  knees 
down,  Mrs.  Mar  pedaled  and  buzzed  away. 

Her  husband  seldom  spoke.  Having  retired  within 
himself  directly  after  the  breakfast  things  were  cleared 
away,  he  seemed  to  be  averse  from  making  the  smallest 
movement  while  his  wife  was  in  the  room.  He  sat  there 
intensely  still,  even  turning  the  leaf  of  his  book  only  at 
long  intervals,  surreptitiously,  without  a  sound.  It  was 
as  though,  by  a  death-like  stillness,  he  should  prove  that 
he  was  not  there.  He  was  really  down  at  the  bank— his 
motionlessness  seemed  to  say. 

As  if  Mrs.  Mar  divined  this  mental  ruse  of  his,  and  felt 
a  need  to  unmask  it,  she  would  look  at  him  sideways,  and 
"What  are  you  doing?"  she  would  ask  briskly. 

"Reading." 

"That  old  Franklin  again  1  Why,  you  've  read  it 
three  or  four  times  already ! "  No  answer.  ' '  Why  don 't 
you  get  something  up-to-date  from  the  library?"  Still 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  147 

no  response.  "Content  just  to  sit  and  sit!"  she  would 
comment  inwardly.  Then  aloud,  "Don't  they  want  a 
manager  up  at  Smithson  's  1' ' 

"No." 

"Why  don't  you  try  for  the  secretaryship  of  the 
New  Pickwick  1" 

"Monty  Fellowes  has  got  it." 

"Ah,  well,  I  suppose  Monty  Fellowes  went  the  length 
of  asking  for  it. ' ' 

Nathaniel  Mar  had  also  gone  that  length,  though  the 
post  was  beneath  a  man  of  his  powers.  But  he  could  not 
tell  over  again  at  home  the  tale  of  his  failures.  Better 
she  should  think  he  had  n  't  tried. 

But,  oh,  the  very  look  of  him  sat  upon  her  spirit,  and 
still  she  looked. 

"You  '11  be  ill  if  you  stay  in  the  house  so  much.  Re 
member  you  've  had  a  walk  twice  a  day  for  going  on 
thirty  years."  No  answer.  His  immobility  made  it  a 
positive  necessity  for  her  to  get  up  and  poke  the  fire 
vigorously,  or  do  something  with  might  and  main.  That 
was  a  thing  he  had  never  tried  in  his  life— to  do  some 
thing  with  might  and  main !  And  that  was  why  he  was 
stranded  like  this  now.  A  man  of  only  fifty-eight !  Why, 
she  herself— Harriet  T.  Mar— was  fifty-nine.  And  just 
see  how  she  took  hold  of  existence— very  much  as  she 
gripped  the  poker.  Oh,  it  was  a  trial  living  in  the  same 
house,  and  all  day  long  in  the  same  room  with  a  ' '  logy ' ' 
man!  He  was  more  sodden  with  failure  every  day  he 
lived.  Misfortune  acted  upon  him  like  an  opiate.  Ha! 
If  she— Harriet  T.  Mar— were  ninety,  misfortune  would 
sting  her  into  action.  At  the  mere  thought  she  sprang 
up  and  stung  her  husband,  or  the  imperturbable  Mongol 


148  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

in  the  kitchen,  or  the  gentle  Hildegarde.  But  truth  to 
tell,  though  that  girl  looked  such  a  tender,  simple  crea 
ture,  it  was  as  little  rewarding  to  wrestle  with  Hilde 
garde  as  with  Mar,  or  the  stolid  Chinaman. 

Indeed,  the  more  the  mother  bustled  the  quieter  grew 
the  girl— not  at  first  consciously  as  a  form  of  protest,  but 
by  a  process  of  natural  reaction  that  was  largely  respon 
sible  for  Hildegarde 's  seeming  calm  to  the  verge  of  in 
sensibility. 

Mrs.  Mar  never  wholly  realized  how  much  to  the  mo 
ther's  exuberant  energy  the  daughter  owed  her  im 
passive  air.  These  influences  playing  about  sensitive 
people  produce  a  curious  rhythm  in  family  life.  Na 
thaniel  Mar's  supineness  made  his  wife  seize  the  reins  and 
ceaselessly  whip  up  the  horses  of  their  car.  Mrs.  Mar's 
frantic  urging  of  the  pace,  the  dust  and  noise  and  whip- 
cracking  of  her  progress,  produced  not  merely  a  yearn 
ing  for  peace  in  Hildegarde 's  mind,  but  a  positive  phys 
ical  need  to  simulate  it.  People  talk  much  of  the  value 
of  good  example,  forgetting  that  we  are  sometimes  shown 
there  is  nothing  so  salutary  as  a  bad  example,  since  out 
of  example  is  wrought  not  merely  the  impulse  toward 
imitation,  but  often  a  passionate  realization  of  the  advan 
tage  of  ' '  another  way. ' ' 

There  was  always  in  the  Mar  house  one  person  with  an 
eye  upon  the  clock— why  need  you  wear  a  watch  ? 

No  need  for  you  to  spur  on  a  servant,  or  make  example 
of  a  tardy  errand  boy.  There  was  always  Mrs.  Mar  to  do 
these  things  with  a  swingeing  efficacy.  Those  who  live 
with  the  Mrs.  Mars  of  the  world  do  not  realize  that  they 
owe  their  own  reputation  for  sweetness  largely  to  the 
caustic  temper  of  some  one  else.  Under  Mrs.  Mar's  roof 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  149 

you  may  "cultivate  kindness"  and  not  suffer  for  it. 
Away  from  her  drastic  influence,  you  yourself  will  have 
to  apportion  grace  and  discipline  more  evenly. 

So  various  is  life  that  we  have  sometimes  a  chance  of 
learning  from  people's  vices  what  their  virtues  could 
never  so  deeply  have  impressed. 

Something  of  this  the  ' '  slow ' '  girl  arrived  at. 

The  day  Mrs.  Mar  and  Hildegarde  went  off  to  spend  a 
week  down  at  the  ranch  with  the  Waynes,  the  two  came 
into  the  dining-room  to  say  good-by  to  Mr.  Mar.  It  was 
to  be  "a  house-party,"  and  Cheviot  and  Mr.  Mar  had 
been  asked,  too.  Cheviot  had  accepted— "from  Satur 
day  night  till  Monday  morning"— but  Mar  had  declined 
to  go  for  any  length  of  time  whatever. 

"A  body  would  think  he  had  affairs  too  important  to 
leave!  Well,  good-by,  Nathaniel.  Don't  let  hot  cin 
ders  fall  on  the  new  hearth-rug.  Take  care  of  yourself, 
and  I  hope  you  '11  have  some  news  for  me  when  I  come 
home. ' ' 

Upon  their  return  the  following  week,  he  was  found 
sitting  in  exactly  the  same  place,  in  the  precise  attitude, 
and  one  might  almost  think  with  the  same  old  book  on  his 
knee  open  at  the  self -same  page. 

"Upon  my  soul !"  ejaculated  Mrs.  Mar,  stopping  short 
on  the  threshold,  while  Hildegarde  went  forward  to  kiss 
her  father.  "No  need  to  ask  if  you  Ve  found  anything 
to  do !  You  have  n  't  even  remembered  to  put  on  a  little 
coal."  She  fell  upon  the  poker  and  punished  the  flag 
ging  fire.  "Have  you  been  sitting  there  like  that  ever 
since  I  went  away  1 ' ' 

Mar  drew  himself  out  from  Hildegarde 's  embrace,  took 
firm  hold  on  his  walking-stick  and  rose  to  his  feet.  He 


150  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

looked  huge,  as  he  towered  above  the  two  women,  and 
rather  wonderful,  as  both  of  them  had  often  thought  of 
late.  Even  the  flippant  Bella  had  said,  "He  's  more  and 
more  like  Moses  and  the  Prophets. ' ' 

"As  to  sitting  here"— he  looked  down  sternly  on  his 
wife— "you  may  as  well  understand,  Harriet,  that  this 
is  the  house  I  propose  to  sit  in  till  I  go  out  lying  down. 
Only  not  in  this  room.  I  agree  with  you  as  to  the  unfit- 
ness  of  that."  He  limped  over  to  the  kitchen  door, 
opened  it,  and  said,  "John,  will  you  light  a  fire  in  the 
young  gentlemen's  bedroom." 

Mrs.  Mar  stared  a  moment,  and  then  went  up-stairs  to 
take  off  her  things.  It  was  no  secret  between  her  and 
Hildegarde  that  "after  all"  they  stood  a  little  in  awe  of 
the  head  of  the  house.  The  girl,  however,  knowing  her 
self  a  privileged  character,  attempted  to  smooth  things 
over  with  a  little  jest.  She  linked  her  arm  in  his,  and 
told  how  her  mother,  on  the  way  down  in  the  train,  had 
produced  the  book  rest  and  a  minute  pencil  from  her 
traveling-bag,  had  fastened  the  rest  on  the  back  of  the 
seat  in  front  of  her,  to  the  surprise  and  inconvenience  of 
the  occupants,  had  set  up  the  French  biography,  put  on 
her  spectacles,  got  out  her  crochet  and  read  her  ' '  Lucien 
Percy"  and  crocheted  for  dear  life  (or  for  the  Hindus 
rather)  every  minute  of  the  time  that  she  was  being 
rushed  along  by  the  express  to  Fern  Lea;  "and  Louis 
Cheviot  leaned  over  and  whispered  in  my  ear,  'Your 
mother  's  losing  time  with  her  feet. '  ' 

But  Mar's  faint  smile  was  pretty  grim.  "Your  mother 
has  all  the  virtues,  my  dear,  but  she  's  a  woman  of  an 
implacable  industry." 

With  the  help  of  John  Chinaman  and  the  grocer's  boy, 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  151 

that  very  afternoon  Mr.  Mar  got  his  big  desk  established 
in  "the  spare  chamber"  that  had  been  Trenn's  and 
Harry's  room,  and  still  was  theirs  when  one  or  other  of 
them  was  in  town,— which  was  often  enough  whenever 
Bella  was  staying  at  the  Mars'. 

But  whether  it  was  that  uncomfortable  as  the  old  quar 
ters  had  been,  it  disturbed  Mar  to  change  them  after 
thirty  years,  eertainly,  in  spite  of  his  pronouncement  to 
his  wife,  he  did  not  "sit"  at  home  as  much  after  this. 
He  made  a  habit  of  going  down  town  after  breakfast,  to 
the  San  Joaquin  Hotel  "to  read  the  papers,"  really  to 
smoke  in  peace,  and  exchange  views  on  the  political  situ 
ation,  or  the  Cuban  atrocities,  with  chance  travelers  or 
old  habitues. 

Then  came  the  day  when  Spanish  incompetence  and 
cruelty  found  a  rival  excitement.  In  a  remote  region  of 
British  North  America  gold  had  been  discovered.  The 
veterans  in  the  San  Joaquin  reading-room  pooh-poohed 
the  notion— all  but  Nathaniel  Mar. 

From  the  beginning  he  took  the  Klondike  seriously. 
Not  long  before  everybody  was  doing  the  same.  Instead 
of  quickly  exhausting  itself  the  excitement  grew.  Had 
diamonds  been  discovered  in  Dakota,  the  matter  would 
have  been  a  nine  days'  wonder,  and  then  died  as  the 
easily  accessible  fields  were  reached  and  appropriated. 
Paradox  as  it  might  appear,  it  was  owing  to  the  forbid 
ding  circumstances  under  which  those  pioneers  of  '97 
found  their  treasure,  that  made  the  appeal  "Klondike" 
so  irresistible  to  the  marvel-loving  fancy  of  the  world. 
The  papers  overflowed  with  accounts  of  the  awful  hard 
ship  and  the  huge  reward— combination  irresistible  since 
history  began.  And  if  any  Missourian  said  ' '  show  me ! " 


152  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

he  was  shown.  The  actual  nuggets  and  the  veritable 
dust,  displayed  in  a  bank  window,  made  would-be  miners 
of  men  as  they  passed,  or  as  they  meant  to  pass  and  stood 
riveted,  staring,  seeing  there  a  type  of  what  they  might 
attain  unto,  if  only  they  had  much  courage  and  a  little 
money  for  an  outfit.  Who  lacked  the  first?  Who  could 
not,  for  so  alluring  a  purpose,  collect  the  second  ? 

The  trains  to  the  ports  of  San  Francisco,  Seattle,  Vic 
toria,  were  crammed;  the  north-bound  ships  overflowed. 
Unenterprising,  indeed,  any  store  on  the  Pacific  coast 
that  did  not  advertise  some  essential  to  a  Klondike  outfit. 
People  talked  with  as  much  earnestness  of  the  science  of 
life  under  arctic  conditions  as  they  before  had  discussed 
Spanish  misrule  in  the  South.  Even  for  the  vast  major 
ity  who  had  no  hope  of  being  able  to  join  the  rush, 
the  great  problem  of  transportation  and  the  value  of 
evaporated  food  stuffs,  obscured  many  an  issue  nearer 
home. 

The  one  man  that  he  was  on  fairly  intimate  terms  with, 
yet  to  whom  Mar  had  not  mentioned  the  new  craze,  was 
Cheviot.  It  was  the  kind  of  thing  he  would  be  certain  to 
scoff  at.  People  at  the  San  Joaquin  had  noticed  that 
scoffing  at  the  Klondike  annoyed  Mr.  Mar,  and  they  won 
dered  a  little.  Mar  had  quite  made  up  his  mind  not  to 
give  Cheviot's  skepticism  a  chance  for  expression.  If 
you  were  unwary  you  might  easily  think,  "So  sympa 
thetic  and  understanding  a  young  man  can't  help  taking 
fire  over  this  burning  question."  And  then  Cheviot 
would  show  you  how  easily  he  could  help  it.  Watch  him 
playing  with  his  little  nephews  and  nieces  and  you  'd 
say,  "So  kind  to  children,  he  will  be  kind  to  the  childish 
ness  in  me. ' '  And  behold  he  was  n  't.  He  was  an  * '  aw- 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  153 

fully  good  fellow,"  but  he  expected  a  man  to  be  grown 
up — and  few  are. 

Mar's  anticipation  of  what  would  be  Cheviot's  views 
about  the  new  craze  were  very  much  Hildegarde's  own. 
Her  astonishment  was  therefore  well-nigh  speechless, 
when,  on  the  occasion  of  his  next  visit,  after  ten  minutes ' 
general  conversation  in  the  garden,  Cheviot  said,  "By 
the  way,  Hildegarde,  I  've  come  to  tell  you  I  'm  going  to 
the  Klondike." 

"You!"  and  she  stared  at  him  in  silence  till  she  could 
reassure  herself  by  saying,  * '  Nonsense ! ' ' 

* l  It  may  be  nonsense,  but  I  'm  going. ' ' 

"You  can't  be  in  earnest!" 

"Quite." 

She  stood,  watering-pot  in  hand,  her  big  eyes  wider 
than  ever  he  had  seen  them,  and  a  look  on  her  face  cer 
tainly  disturbed,  even  annoyed. 

It  was  n't  very  nice,  this  feeling  as  if  the  bottom  were 
dropping  out  of  existence.  He  had  no  right  to  make  her 
feel  like  that. 

Very  neatly  he  switched  off  the  head  of  a  withered 
flower  with  his  stick,  and  began,  "The  Klondike— 

"It  's  rather  horrid  of  you, ' '  Hildegarde  interrupted, 
"but  of  course  I  know— you— you  're  only  seeing  how 
I  'd  take  it-" 

'  *  I  shan  't  be  here  to  see  how  you  '11  take  it. ' ' 

She  set  down  the  watering  can.  "You  surely  won't 
dream  of  doing  anything  so  foolish— so— so— dangerous. ' ' 

He  did  n't  answer,  and  she  walked  beside  him  down 
the  path  to  the  lower  gate.  When  they  got  beyond  the 
group  of  conifers,  she  stopped.  ' '  You  simply  must  n  't. " 

"Why  do  you  say  that?    You  don't  care  where  I  go." 


154  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

' '  You  know  quite  well  I  do. " 

He  did  n't  even  look  at  her,  and  he  shook  his  head. 
Then,  after  a  little  pause,  "Who  knows,  you  might  even 
come  to  feel  differently  about  things — if — if—' 

"Do  you  mean" — Hildegarde  drew  herself  up— "if 
you  came  home  a  millionaire  ? ' ' 

"  If  I  did  n  't  come  home  at  all. ' ' 

"What?" 

* '  At  least  for  a  long  time,  like— 

"I  certainly  hope"— nervously  she  forestalled  the 
utterance  of  that  other  name— "that  you  won't  do  any 
thing  so  disappointing  to  all  your  old  friends.  It  's  the 
kind  of  fortune-hunting  expedition  for  the  ne'er-do-well. 
It  is  n 't  for  a  man  like  you. ' ' 

"Well,  I  've  thought  it  over,"  he  said,  "and  I  've 
come  to  the  conclusion  that  I  'm  best  out  of  Valdivia  for 
a  time.  You  see,  Hildegarde,  you  're  too  used  to  me. ' ' 

"I  'm  not  'too  used.'  " 

"Too  certain  of  me— yes,  you  are.  I  've  been  uncom 
mon  helpless  in  the  matter.  I  've  got  nothing  of  the 
actor  in  me.  I  can't  be  near  you,  and  inspire  you  with 
the  smallest  doubt  as  to  how  things  are  with  me.  The 
one  thing  I  can  do  is  not  to  be  near.  And  that  's  what 
I  'm  going  to  do. ' ' 

She  wrinkled  up  her  white  forehead  with  a  harassed 
attempt  to  keep  her  wits  about  her,  and  not  be  betrayed 
into  rash  professions.  "You  can  go  away  from  Valdivia 
for  a  while,  if  that  idea  is  so  attractive,  without  going  to 
the  horrible  Klondike. ' ' 

"Yes,  I  could  go  to  Pasadena  or  some  seaside  resort, 
so  that  I  could  come  running  back,  as  I  did  last  year 
from  Monterey,  on  the  first  hint  that  you  might  be  miss- 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  155 

ing  me  a  little.  No,  all  that  's  been  tried.  It  does  n't 
work.  I  must  go  to  some  place  where  I  can 't  take  the 
first  train  back ;  where  I  won 't  live  through  the  day  ex 
pecting  a  letter  from  you.  It  is  n't  easy  in  these  times 
for  anybody  to  be  really  'out  of  reach.'  When  we  all 
know  that  we  've  only  to  go  to  the  nearest  telegraph 
office  for  news,  we  can't  know  what  it  would  be  like  ut 
terly  to  lose  some  one— unless  death  teaches  us.  The 
nearest  approach  to  the  sort  of  thing  I  mean— this  side 
of  Kingdom  Come— is  the  Klondike." 

"Oh,  Klondike,  Klondike!  I  'm  sick  of  the  very 
sound  of  those  two  syllables.  There  's  something  un 
canny  about  them.  People  have  gone  mad  since  they 
heard  the  ugly  word,  but  not  you!"— to  give  her  words 
more  than  common  emphasis,  to  insure  winning  the  day, 
she  laid  her  hand  on  his  arm,  and  said  again,  with  soft 
deliberation — "Not  you,  Louis." 

* '  You  'd  like  me  to  stay  here  and  suffer.  Yes,  I  know 
that."  Her  hand  dropped  from  his  sleeve.  "But  I 
shan't  stay  here,"  he  went  on  unmoved,  "and  pretty 
soon  I  shan't  suffer — so  much." 

From  that  old,  recurrent  touch  of  hardness  in  his  voice 
and  air,  she  once  again  recoiled.  ' l  Well,  I  've  said  all  I 
mean  to  say.  You  must  please  yourself. ' ' 

"Pleasure  is  of  course  what  one  expects  in  the  Klon 
dike." 

They  walked  in  absolute  silence  back  to  the  porch. 
Hildegarde  went  in  at  once,  saying  "good-night"  over 
her  shoulder,  and  quite  sure  that  as  usual  he  would  fol 
low  her.  But  he  stayed  behind  for  fully  twenty  minutes, 
talking  with  Mr.  Mar,  who  was  smoking  out  there  in  the 
dusk.  Hildegarde  turned  up  the  electric  light  in  the 


156  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

parlor,  and  moved  about  the  room,  picking  up  and  put 
ting  down  one  book  after  another.  How  many  of  them 
he  had  given  her— that  provoking  person  who  stayed  so 
long  talking  to  her  father!  By  and  by  she  heard  her 
own  name  called.  Was  that  her  father?  How  curious 
his  voice  sounded !' 

' '  Yes, ' '  she  answered,  but  made  no  great  haste.  When 
at  last  she  reached  her  father's  side,  she  could  n't  see 
where  Cheviot  was.  She  looked  round  in  the  dim  light, 
and  a  little  sharply,  "Has  he  gone?"  she  said.  As  the 
words  fell  on  the  quiet  air,  she  heard  the  gate  shut.  The 
sound  jarred.  It  gave  her  a  sensation  as  of  a  being  aban 
doned.  The  house  was  very  quiet  to-night. 

"Gone?  Yes.  Where  's  your  mother,  Hildegarde?" 
Mar  asked  with  unheard-of  briskness. 

"She  's  over  at  the  Coxes'." 

"Ah!"  A  moment's  pause,  and  then,  "To  think  of 
Cheviot !  Cheviot  of  all  men !  Were  n  't  you  surprised  1 ' ' 

"You  are  n't  talking  about  the  Klondike?" 

' '  What  else  should  I  be  talking  of  ? "  he  demanded  un 
reasonably,  for  after  all  there  were  other  topics. 

1 '  Do  you  think  he  really  means  it  ? "  Hildegarde  asked. 

"Means  it?— with  a  year's  leave  granted,  and  his 
ticket  in  his  pocket?  He  's  been  getting  ready  all  this 
week.  That  's  why  we  have  n't  seen  him.  Sails  Wed 
nesday.  ' ' 

"Not— not  really!" 

"Off  to  'Frisco  to-morrow,"  said  her  father,  still  in 
that  odd  brisk  voice— "four  days  to  see  about  his  outfit. 
He— it  's  a  queer  world!— he  said  Trenn  had  been  into 
the  bank  this  afternoon,  and  offered  to  grubstake  him. 
But  Cheviot  's  got  money.  So  anything  he  finds  will  be 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  157 

his  own.  Trenn!  H'm!  Trenn!91  he  repeated,  as 
though  he  could  n  't  get  over  it.  Then  it  seemed  to  dawn 
upon  him  that  Hildegarde  had  been  unprepared  for 
something  else  than  her  brother 's  part  in  the  affair.  * '  I 
thought  Cheviot  said  he  'd  been  talking  to  you  about  it 
—had  said  good-by." 

''I — I  did  n't  believe  he  was  in  earnest." 

"Why  not?"  demanded  her  father  a  little  harshly, 
and  then,  perceiving  that  her  incredulity  might  have 
other  grounds  than  disapproval  of  the  enterprise  in  it 
self,  he  said  more  gently :  ' '  He  talks  very  sensibly  about 
it,  my  dear.  A  man  can't  save  much  at  the  bank— he 
may  go  on  for  thirty  years  and  find—  Cheviot  has  seen 
what  that  may  come  to.  He  gives  himself  a  nine  months' 
holiday,  with  the  chance  of  its  turning  out  the  most 
profitable  nine  months  of  his  life.  I  did  n't  discourage 
him." 

Hildegarde  sat  down  on  the  step.  "Oh,  you  did  n't 
discourage  him,"  she  repeated  dully.  Behind  her  own 
sense  of  being  wronged  in  some  way,  as  well  as  disap 
pointed,  she  was  conscious  of  an  unwonted  excitement  in 
her  father. 

He,  sitting  there  in  the  dusk,  puffing  out  great  clouds 
of  smoke,  was  oblivious  of  everything  except  that  the  old 
pride  of  discovery  had  awaked  in  him,  and  the  fever  of 
his  youth  came  back. 

' ' Even  Cheviot !  And  think  of  Trenn! ' '  That  Trenn 
should  be  looking  about  for  some  one  to  send  to  the  North 
on  this  errand— it  touched  the  topmost  pinnacle  of  the 
fabulous.  And  yet,  why  not?  The  country  was  aflame. 
Thousands  starting  off  on  an  uncertainty  to  try  for  the 
thing  he,  Nathaniel  Mar,  had  been  certain  of. 


158  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

* '  Hildegarde,  where  is  your  mother  ? ' ' 

"I  told  you,  at  the  Coxes'." 

"  Oh,  at  the  Coxes '." 

"Why,  father?" 

' '  Would  you  like  to  know  the  reason  I  did  n  't  discour 
age  Cheviot  from  going  to  the— 

"Yes,  father,"  said  the  girl  dully. 

' '  Then  come  nearer. ' ' 

She  moved  toward  him.  Feeling  a  little  dreary,  she 
came  quite  close.  She  laid  her  head  against  the  one 
strong  knee. 

In  a  vigorous  undertone,  the  voice  with  new  life  in  it 
told  why  Nathaniel  Mar  did  n't  blame  any  young  man— 
there  was  more  treasure  in  the  North  than  even  the  Klon- 
diker  dreamed.  Mar  had  known  it  all  along — and  then 
the  story.  In  spite  of  the  girl's  listlessness  when  he  be 
gan,  he  could  feel  directly  that  the  thing  was  taking  hold 
of  her.  She  was  intensely  still ;  that  was  because  she  was 
being  ' '  held, ' '  and  small  wonder !  It  was  a  better  story 
than  he  had  realized.  It  took  hold  of  him  even,  who 
knew  it  so  well.  Before  he  got  to  the  end,  his  voice  was 
shaking,  and  he  leaned  forward  thirsting  to  see  an  an 
swering  excitement  in  the  young  face  at  his  knee.  But 
the  darkness  shrouded  it,  and  he  went  on.  He  wished 
she  would  speak  or  move.  Always  so  still,  that  girl! 
Now  he  was  telling  her  of  his  home-coming  from  that 
barren  coast  in  the  North— explaining,  excusing  what, 
by  this  new  lurid  light  of  the  Klondike,  seemed  inexcusa 
ble—his  never  going  back.  He  tried  to  reconstruct  for 
her  the  obstacles— huge,  insurmountable ;  the  long  illness, 
and  the  new  wife;  the  post  at  the  bank;  the  children, 
poverty,  skepticism  and  the  obscuring  dust  of  the  years. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  159 

And  lo !  as  he  disturbed  these  ashes,  he  saw  afresh  the 
agonies  they  hid— remembered  with  a  growing  chill, 
what  had  befallen  before  whenever  he  told  this  story; 
saw  the  tolerant  smile  of  the  smug  young  bankers;  saw 
the  dull  embarrassment  in  Elihu  Cox's  eye;  heard  Mrs. 
Mar  leading  the  family  chorus,  "You  've  got  to  show  me !" 

Even  Hildegarde  might  ask— he  hastened  to  forestall 
the  dreaded  word.  "There  was  nothing  to  show,"  he 
said,  "absolutely  nothing  to  prove  it  was  n't  a  dream." 
And  she  made  no  sign  that  for  her  either  it  was  more 
than  fantasy. 

He  wondered  miserably  why  he  had  told  her.  "Of 
course  it  was  all  long  before  anybody  had  heard  of  the 
Klondike, ' '  he  said,  and  he  drew  a  heavy  breath.  ' '  The 
theory  was,  that  geologically  speaking,  gold  could  n't 
exist  up  there,  and  even  people  who  were  n't  geologists 
agreed  it  could  n't  be  got  out  if  it  was  there"— all  the 
confidential  earnestness  had  vanished  out  of  the  voice, 
and  he  paused  like  one  very  weary.  "Nobody  be 
lieved—  He  tried  to  go  on,  and  to  speak  as  usual,  but 
memory,  master  of  the  show,  brought  up  Trenn— Trenn 
with  the  look  he  had  worn  the  day  his  father  had  told 
him  the  great  secret.  Mar  drew  back  into  the  deeper 
shadow.  But  the  critical  boy  face  found  his  father  out, 
and  stung  him  in  the  dark. 

He  was  an  old  fool.  What  had  possessed  him  to  rake 
it  all  up  again.  Oh,  yes,  he  said  bitterly  in  his  heart, 
there  was  one  member  of  his  family  who  had  n't  yet 
smiled  and  said,  "Show  me.  I  'm  from  Missouri."  It 
was  Hildegarde 's  turn. 

"Well,  my  girl,"  he  ended  miserably,  "that  's  the 
story  that  nobody  believed. ' ' 


160  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

Hildegarde  lifted  her  head  and  put  up  her  two  hands, 
feeling  in  the  dark  for  his.  But  Mar  shrank  back.  Not 
from  Hildegarde  herself  could  he  in  that  hour  take  mere 
sympathy,  craving  hopelessly  as  he  did  with  the  long 
thirst  of  years  a  thing  more  precious  than  pity— the 
thing  that  he  once  had  had  and  had  no  more. 

Like  a  man  who  utters  his  own  epitaph,  "I  lost  faith 
myself,"  he  said. 

"But  I  have  found  it,  father!"  and  there  was  joy  as 
well  as  the  sound  of  tears  in  the  thrilling  young  voice. 
"Found— what  did  you  say,  Hildegarde?" 
' '  That  I  believe  the  gold  's  there,  waiting ! ' ' 
"Ah— h— h!"     He  bent  over  her  with  a  sound  that 
was  almost  a  sob.    ' '  Then  I— I  believe  it,  too ! ' ' 


CHAPTER  IX 

>OUIS  CHEVIOT  was  one  of  those  who 
reached  the  Klondike  in  the  autumn  of  '97. 
A  lucky  chance  brought  him  the  oppor 
tunity  of  going  shares  in  a  lay  on  Bonanza, 
with  a  man  whose  fitness  for  ' '  pardnership ' ' 
Cheviot  had  tested  coming  over  the  awful  Pass  and 
shooting  the  Hootalinqua  Rapids. 

The  two  had  washed  out  ten  thousand  dollars  apiece 
by  the  end  of  June.  They  had  the  prospect  of  making 
an  even  better  thing  of  it  the  next  year.  Cheviot  left  his 
partner  to  carry  on  the  development  of  the  lease,  and 
for  himself,  turned  his  bronzed  face  homeward. 

He  was  as  certain  now  as  before  he  had  garnered  this 
experience  that  for  wild  life,  qua  wild  life,  he  had  no 
taste.  That  it  should  be  so  was  partly,  strange  as  it  may 
sound,  a  result  of  the  cool  and  balanced  mixing  of  the 
elements  in  him.  He  had  no  physical  sluggishness  to  be 
sloughed  off  by  harsh  impacts,  no  mental  inertia  to 
be  hammered  into  action  by  hard  necessity,  no  crust  of 
chrysalis  that  must  be  broken  before  the  winged  life 
might  emerge,  no  essential  wildness  of  spirit  that  needed 
training,  no  excess  of  ungoverned  ardor  that  needed 
cooling  in  the  northern  frosts. 

And  so  it  was  that  he  was  coming  home  with  little 
gain  but  bullion,  since  he  had  gone  forth  with  smaller 

11  161 


162  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

need  than  most  of  the  lesson  learnt  in  chastening  the 
body,  or  the  lightening  revelation  of  some  crashing 
danger. 

He  could  endure  hardship  with  reasonable  patience 
for  some  reasonable  end,  but  the  gains  of  civilization 
were  in  his  eyes  too  excellent  to  be  even  temporarily 
abandoned  without  a  sense  of  heavy  deprivation,  which 
affected  him  like  a  loss  of  common  dignity. 

Even  though  he  had  n't  one  he  loved  the  idea  of  home. 
He  loved  his  friends  and  all  the  friendlier  aspect  of  the 
earth,  gardens,  ordered  communities  of  his  kind,  and 
all  man's  device  for  socializing  life  and  regulating  the 
unruliness  of  nature. 

And  there  was  Hildegarde— who  had  not  answered 
either  of  his  two  letters.  Why  was  that?  He  felt  a  con 
traction  of  the  heart  as  he  refused  to  allow  himself  to 
formulate  surmise ;  yet  if  any  one  had  come  and  said  to 
him,  "Galbraith  's  in  Valdivia,"  he  would  have  felt  it 
no  surprise. 

Some  friends  of  his  were  going  out  by  the  Yukon  River 
route.  He  knew  it  to  be  unlikely  that  he  should  return  to 
this  part  of  the  world.  As  well  see  that  more  western  as 
pect  of  it,  too,  since  he  might  do  so  in  congenial  com 
pany. 

It  was  really  the  company  that  decided  him— that  was 
responsible  for  a  circumstance  that  changed  the  entire 
course  of  his  own  and  several  other  lives.  Instead  of 
going  back  as  he  had  come,  by  the  shorter  way,  he  found 
himself,  at  the  end  of  July,  with  seventeen  hundred  miles 
of  river  behind  him  waiting  at  the  mouth  of  the  Yukon 
for  the  San  Francisco  steamer. 

He  heard  with  surprise  that  there  was  a  letter  for  him 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  163 

at  the  post-office.  The  more  strange,  if  true,  since  his 
coming  to  St.  Michaels  was  less  than  mere  chance— it  had 
been  unlikely  in  the  extreme. 

However,  upon  demand,  an  envelop  appeared  in  the 
window  of  the  little  post-office.     Before  ever  it  reached 
the  hand  of  the  man  waiting  without,  he  recognized  Hil 
degarde 's  writing.     He  tore  it  open  to  read  a  hurried 
resume  of  what  she  said  she  had  already  written  him  at 
length,  to  Dyea  and  to  Dawson,  and  now  repeated,  on  the 
bare  possibility  of  his  taking  the  American  route  home. 
For  her  father  was  just  setting  out  by  that  same  route 
to  the  far  North,  and  by  the  same  ship  that  carried  her 
letter.    His  plan  of  campaign  was  not  generally  known, 
and  all  she  could  say  with  certainty  was  that  he  would 
be  at  St.  Michaels  some  time  in  August.    And  she  greatly 
hoped  that  if  Cheviot  should  be  passing  that  way,  or 
even  if  he  found  that  he  could  arrange  to  go  there  with 
out  too  great  personal  cost,  Hildegarde  hoped,  and  even 
begged,  that  he  would  look  out  for  her  father.     She 
"quite  approved,"  Cheviot  read  with  incredulous  eyes— 
(Hildegarde!  who  had  thought  the  expedition  mad  for  a 
man  young  and  sound  as  an  oak)— she  quite  approved 
her  father's  going.    At  the  same  time  she  did  not  forget 
that  he  was  no  longer  young,  and  being  so  lame  was  at  a 
disadvantage.    "Good  Lord!  I  should  say  so !"    The  up 
shot  was  that  she  "lived  upon  the  hope"  that  Cheviot 
would  bring  her  news  of  Mr.  Mar.    The  ideal  thing  would 
be  that  they  should  come  home  together.     If  Cheviot 
brought  that  about  she  would  be  "unendingly  grateful." 

No  syllable  about  Galbraith. 

Cheviot  went  straight  to  the  Alaska  Commercial  Com 
pany's  hotel  and  looked  through  the  names  registered 


164  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

since  the  season  opened.  Not  a  Mar  among  them.  So 
the  ship  that  brought  the  letter  had  not  brought  Mr.  Mar 
—for  this  was  the  only  conceivable  place  he  could  have 
stayed  in.  It  was  no  small  personal  relief  to  Cheviot  to 
conclude  that  wiser  counsels  had  prevailed. 

The  same  afternoon  it  was  noised  about  the  office  that 
a  steamer  had  just  been  sighted.  After  all,  Mar  might 
only  be  delayed!  While  most  of  the  population  rushed 
down  to  the  beach,  Cheviot  scribbled  a  hasty  note  and 
handed  it  to  the  clerk. 

"If  a  man  of  that  name  should  come  in  on  this  ship — ' 
he  began. 

"He  has  n't  gone  back  yet,"  interrupted  the  clerk, 
studying  the  superscription. 

' '  You  don 't  mean  he  's  here  already  1 ' ' 

"Well,  he  was." 

4 '  When  ?    It  can 't  be  the  person  I  mean  ? ' ' 

"Lame  man,  about  sixty?  Yes,  yes,  remember  him 
perfectly.  Could  n't  quite  make  him  out,  for  he  did  n't 
seem  to  care  a  tinker's  curse  about  getting  to  the  Klon 
dike.  The  boys  set  him  down  finally  as  a  sort  of  a  mis 
sionary,  because"  (with  a  laugh)  "he  seemed  so  ready  to 
go  the  wrong  way." 

"Which  way?" 

"Up  the  coast  to  Golovin  Bay."  No,  he  had  n't  come 
back.  A  trader  from  Kwimkuk,  who  had  been  down  for 
supplies,  said  Mar  was  staying  up  there  at  the  Swedish 
Mission.  That  was  all  the  clerk  knew.  He  was  turning 
the  pages  back  to  the  entries  of  the  previous  summer. 
"That  's  the  man!"  And  there  was  Mar's  unmistak 
able  signature  staring  Cheviot  in  the  face. 

"But  that  's  '97,"  he  said  bewildered.    He  pulled  out 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  165 

Hildegarde's  letter,  and  looked  again  at  the  date.  It 
was  a  year  old. 

Shortie  Hinkson  stopped  sweeping  out  the  office  to  say : 
"One  o'  them  missionary  fellers  come  down  here  from 
Golovin  Sat 'day.  No,  he  ain't  gone  back  yit.  I  seen 
him  only  a  while  ago  goin '  by  the  A.C.  office. ' ' 

When  a  few  minutes  later,  among  the  crowd  down  by 
the  old  Block  House,  the  missionary  was  run  to  earth, 
Cheviot  found  him  a  great  tow-headed  Swede,  looking  as 
if  he  had  been  not  so  much  cut  out  of  wood  as  hacked 
out,  and  with  a  very  dull  implement  at  that.  Close  at 
his  elbow,  and  appealed  to  now  and  then  for  verification 
of  some  statement,  was  a  thin  little  dark  man,  with  glit 
tering  black  eyes  and  a  turn  for  silence. 

The  tall  missionary  was  bargaining  about  some ' '  canned 
stuff"  with  the  great  A.C.  Company's  agent,  Captain 
Seilberg.  This  magnate,  leaning  against  one  of  the 
mounted  cannon  the  Russians  had  left  behind  in  '67,  was 
looking  through  a  spy-glass  at  the  ship  discernible  on 
the  far  horizon,  while  between  ejaculatory  oaths  he  "did 
business"  with  the  rugged  Lutheran.  Waiting  for  a 
chance  to  introduce  himself,  Cheviot  wondered  aside  to 
a  bystander  why  those  two  talked  English  to  each  other. 

"Oh,  Seilberg  's  a  Norwegian." 

"No,  a  Dane,"  put  in  another,  overhearing. 

"I  thought,"  said  Cheviot,  "they  could  all  understand 
one  another  after  a  fashion— all  Scandinavians." 

"Scanda  who?  Well,  anyway,  they  're  too  thick  on  the 
ground  in  Alaska  for  us  to  bother  about  fine  distinctions. ' ' 

"Yes,"  agreed  the  customs  officer,  as  Cheviot  pressed 
forward  to  speak  to  the  missionary,  "so  far  as  we  're 
concerned  they  're  all  Scandahoojians  together." 


166  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

Certainly  Mr.  Christiansen  knew  Mr.  Mar.  Mr.  Mar 
was  still  at  the  Mission  House  up  at  Kwimkuk.  How  to 
get  there  ?  The  big  missionary  turned  to  his  silent  com 
panion,  who  still  stood  gloomily  by.  Mr.  Bjork  and  he 
would  n't  mind  taking  back  a  passenger  in  their  boat. 
They  were  going  just  as  soon  as  they  'd  settled  matters 
with  Captain  Seilberg. 

"Veil,  7  von't  keep  you,"  says  the  great  man  cava 
lierly,  shutting  up  the  spy-glass  with  a  snap.  "Dat  's 
not  de  Trush,  Got  dammer ! ' '  and  he  turned  testily  away. 
Mr.  Christiansen  followed  with  words  about  rebate  on 
"damaged  cans."  Mr.  Bjork  followed  Mr.  Christiansen, 
deaf  to  Cheviot's  questions  about  Mar,  eyes  fixed  in 
glassy  abstraction  on  the  red-brown  scoriae  under  foot. 

THE  two  "Scandahoojians"  and  their  passenger  left  St. 
Michaels  the  next  day  in  the  little  sail-boat  St.  Olaf, 
managed  with  no  small  skill  by  Mr.  Bjork.  It  was  the 
rugged  Christianson,  however,  who  issued  the  orders,  and 
strangely  enough,  considering  his  aspect,  supplied  the 
social  element  and  the  information.  If  you  saw  Chris 
tianson  alone,  you  would  have  thought  him  one  of  the 
grimmest  works  of  God,  but  seeing  him  beside  Bjork 
you  would  find  him  almost  genial. 

What  chiefly  occupied  Cheviot,  as  the  St.  Olaf  sped 
through  the  windy  drizzle,  was  a  growing  wonder  as  to 
how  Hildegarde's  father  had  come  to  be  stranded  up 
here  all  these  months,  and  how  a  man  accustomed  to 
creature  comforts,  a  cripple,  and  close  on  sixty— how 
had  he  endured  the  conditions  of  life  at  "Golovin!" 
What  were  the  conditions  at  Golovin  ?  Curious  to  know, 
for  Hildegarde  would  ask— afraid  to  know,  for  Hilde- 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  167 

garde  must  be  answered,  he  kept  seeing  in  flashes  and 
as  through  the  eyes  of  a  girl,  all  the  probable  harshness 
of  the  old  man's  adventure. 

Cheviot's  questions  about  Golovin  were  interrupted 
by  Mr.  Christiansen  somewhat  narrowly— eliciting  an 
account  of  how  the  mission  prospered;  what  the  na 
tive  population  was;  how  many  were  converts;  and 
other  matters  not  strictly  to  the  point  Cheviot  had  in 
mind. 

"Yes,  oh,  yes!  Dere  is  great  acti-viMy.  You  can 
see  in  our  reports.  Ve  make  great  progress.  Ve  bring 
de  true  light  to  many  who  sat  in  darkness.  But  ve  arre 
p00re_meezerabble  poore.  Nobody  knows,  what  haf 
not  lief  dere,  how  harrd  de  life.  Eh,  Bjork?" 

Bjork,  sheet  in  hand,  gloomily  assented,  without  the 
aid  of  speech. 

Cheviot  caught  his  glancing  eye.  ' '  Are  you— a— a— at 
the  mission,  too?" 

The  dark  man  studied  the  course  and  held  on  his  silent 
way. 

"Oh,  yes.  Mr.  Bjork  ees  von  of  os.  He  is  not  long 
dere— but  he  understand.  Ve  haf  great  need  of  vorkers. 
So  he  come." 

"You  mean  you  sent  home  for  Mr.  Bjork?" 

Mr.  Christiansen  stared  a  moment.  ' '  Send  home  ?  Oh, 
it  is  far  to  Sveden.  Heaven  is  nearer. ' ' 

It  was  Cheviot's  turn  for  mystification. 

"Vhen  ve  need  helpers,"  Mr.  Christiansen  explained, 
"ve  pray  for  dem.  God  send  os  Mr.  Bjork." 

He  spoke  with  a  curious  matter-of-factness. 

"Oh,"  said  Cheviot,  "and— a— how  did  Mr.  Bjork 
know  where  to  find  you?" 


168  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"He  see  Kwimkuk  in  a  visshun.  He  see  de  Mission 
House  and  he  see  me,  too.  Eh,  Bjork." 

The  helper  nodded  with  preternatural  gravity. 

"Where  were  you/'  said  Cheviot,  "when  you  had  the 
vision  ? ' ' 

"On  board  a  whaler.  Dat  's  where  Bjork  was," 
proudly  Christiansen  answered  for  him.  "  On  de  whaler 
up  in  Grantley  Harbor,  vhile  I  am  down  dere  at  Kwim- 
kuk  praying  for  help." 

' '  But  how  could  he  leave  his  ship  ? ' ' 

"Leedle  boat,"  said  Christiansen,  laconic  for  once. 

"Oh,  the  captain  let  him  off?" 

Christiansen  shook  his  pale  locks.  "You  do  not  know 
vhat  dey  are— dose  whaling  captains." 

"You  don't  mean"— in  his  astonishment  Cheviot  ad 
dressed  the  dumb  navigator  again,  as  if  given  such  a 
theme  even  he  must  at  last  find  tongue— "you  don't 
mean  you,"  and  then  he  halted,  for  there  is  something 
about  the  impact  of  the  word  "deserted"  that  men  shy 
from,  "you  don't  mean  you  left  the  ship  without 
leave?"  Bjork 's  face  never  changed. 

But  not  so  Christiansen's.  He  regarded  his  acolyte 
with  a  somber  enthusiasm.  "It  was  yoost  like  Bjork. 
Say  noddind.  Yoost  follow  de  call.  Dat  's  Bjork ! ' ' 

"Pretty  big  risk,  I  should  have  thought." 

At  which,  somewhat  to  Cheviot's  surprise,  Bjork  gave 
a  sharp  little  nod  and  Christiansen  showed  his  long  yel 
low  teeth  in  a  rather  horrible  smile. 

Cheviot  felt  egged  on  to  say,  "Don't  they  shoot  de 
serters  up  here?" 

"Yes!"  said  Bjork,  speaking  for  the  first  time. 

"If  dey  find  dem,"  amended  Christiansen. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  169 

Bjork 's  little  eyes  glittered.  His  thin  lips  moved 
faintly,  as  if  they,  too,  would  have  smiled  had  they  ever 
learned  the  trick  of  it. 

1  'And  you  came  straight  to  Kwimkuk?"  persisted 
Cheviot. 

"No,  he  land  oop  by  Sinook,"  Christiansen  said. 
' '  He  see  dat  not  de  place  he  vas  shown  in  de  visshun,  and 
dose  whaler  fellows  after  him  de  next  day.  Bjork  hide 
in  de  scrub  villow,  and  creep  along  vid  hands  and  knees. 
After  two  days  he  come  to  a  native  camp.  Next  morn 
ing  he  see  out  dere  dat  Seagull  comin'.  But  he  haf  an- 
odder  visshun.  He  know  now  he  haf  to  get  a  squaw  to 
hide  him  in  de  bottom  ob  a  kyak,  and  take  him  like  dat 
down  de  coast  to  Golovin.  Terrible  long  journey !  I 
am  down  dere  on  de  shore,  when  de  squaw  beach  de  boat. 
I  see  Bjork  crawl  out  de  hole  in  de  middle,  half  dead, 
and  look  round.  Look  all  round.  Den  I  hear  him  say  in 
Svedish,  'Dis  de  place!'  and  I  say,  'Vad  Plads?'  leedle 
surprised,  and  he  come  right  away  up  to  me,  and  he  say 
'De  Lord  sent  me/  So  I  see  he  vas  de  man  I  pray  for." 

"Oh!  And  when  he  is  n't  managing  a  boat— up  at 
the  mission,  what  does  Mr.  Bjork  do  ? " 

"Oh,  he  help,"  said  Christiansen,  with  unshakable  sat 
isfaction  in  the  answer  to  his  prayer.  "Better  as  any 
body  he  can  preach. ' ' 

"Preach?"  echoed  Cheviot,  not  believing  his  ears. 

"Yes,  Bjork  not  talk  mooch,  except  vhen  he  is  in  de 
pulpit  or  vhen  he  haf  a  ref elation." 

Well,  they  were  odd  Hausgenossen  for  Hildegarde's 
father !  "How  long  had  Mr.  Mar  been  with  them,"  Che 
viot  asked.  Ten  or  eleven  months.  He  had  got  to  St. 
Michaels  too  late  last  year  to  reach  the  Klondike.  He 


170  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

just  had  time  to  go  and  take  a  look  at  Golovin  Bay, 
when  the  winter  overtook  him  at  Kwimkuk.  So  he 
stayed  there. 

But  this  summer?  Well,  he  was  taken  ill  just  about 
the  time  the  ice  went  out  of  the  bay— no,  no,  he  was  all 
right  now.  Mrs.  Christiansen  had  nursed  him.  Chris- 
tianson  did  n't  know  what  Mar's  plans  were — doubted  if 
anybody  did ;  though  he  was  laying  in  supplies  for  some 
sort  of  excursion.  He  once  had  an  idea  of  going  all  the 
way  to  Teller  Station  to  see  the  Government  reindeer. 
That  was  Mar 's  stuff,  there,  in  the  boat.  Of  course  it  was 
little  use  now  to  go  to  the  Klondike.  Besides,  what  in 
centive  had  a  man  of  that  age  to  face  the  hardships  of 
prospecting  in  the  arctic1?  It  was  no  matter  if  such  a 
man  had  not  great  fortune.  He  would  n't  know  how  to 
use  it.  He  had  not,  Mr.  Christiansen  was  sorry  to  say  it, 
but  Mr.  Mar  had  not  the  true  light. 

From  which  Cheviot  gathered  that  Mr.  Mar  had  not 
contributed  all  he  might  to  the  cause  of  Righteousness. 
But  it  was  a  relief  to  know  that  he  had  not  been  in 
straits.  "He  seem  to  haf  blenty  to  bay  his  bills"— so 
why  had  he  come  up  there,  caring  neither  for  money 
nor  for  missions?  Here  Cheviot  caught  the  momentary 
gleam  in  Bjork's  little  eyes.  A  question  in  them,  but 
unspoken,  like  all  else  that  went  on  in  the  close-cropped 
bullet  head.  Cheviot  became  aware  that  his  old  friend 
had  somehow  succeeded  in  making  himself  an  object  of 
intense  curiosity  to  these  queer  folk. 

They  liked  Mr.  Mar,  though— Christiansen  tried  to 
catch  Bjork's  eye,  but  the  dark  one  declined  confederacy 
—though  Mr.  Mar  had  done  something  a  little  while  ago 
that  made  a  great  deal  of  trouble. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  171 

"Hein?  Veil,  it  vas  like  dis.  Von  of  our  great  deefi- 
coolty  is  de  vitchcraftiness  of  de  natives.  Not  a  season 
go  by  vidout  dey  have  to  tie  up  some  von."  He  pursed 
his  wrinkled  lips  and  slowly  shook  his  colorless  locks. 

"  Oh ! "  said  Cheviot,  feeling  his  way.  ' '  How  long  do 
they  keep  them  tied  up  ? " 

"Till  dey  confesses,  or  till  dey  dies." 

There  was  need  then  of  the  missionary  in  this  savage 
place,  where  Hildegarde  's  father  had  had  to  spend  a  year 
of  his  life. 

"And  if  they  confess,  it  's  all  right,  is  it?"  asked  Che 
viot. 

"If  dey  confess,  and  if  dey  go  and  get  a  piece  of  de 
fur,  or  vhatever  it  is,  dat  dey  Ve  cut  off  de  clo'es  of  de 
person  dey  been  vitching,  and  if  dey  give  it  back,  and 
promise  '  never  again/  ' 

"And  then  they  're  forgiven?" 

"Yes.  Sometimes  dey  're  stoned,  sometimes  dey  're 
yoost  spit  at  and  den  let  to  vander  avay— but  dey  're 
forgiven. ' ' 

"Oh,  like  that?  Well,  I  wonder  they  trouble  to  con 
fess." 

"Dey  like  it  better  dan  to  be  dead." 

"Dead?" 

"Burnt." 

"Really?  They  went  as  far  as  that?  But  now,  you 
mission  people,  I  suppose,  have  put  a  stop  to  such  goings 
on!" 

"Ve  are  not  greater  at  Kwimkuk  dan  Saul  at  Endor." 

Cheviot  stared. 

"But  Mr.  Mar,"  the  missionary  went  on,  "he  vill  be 
viser  dan  de  Prophets.  He  tink  dere  are  no  more  any 


172  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

vitches.  Not  even  vhen  he  see  dat  Yakutat  girl  dey  call 
Omilik— not  even  vhen  he  see  vhat  she  have  done.  But 
von  day  Mr.  Mar  hear  some  noise,  and  he  go  down  to  de 
beach,  and  he  see  de  girl  tied  to  de  tall  stone  ve  fastens 
our  boats  to.  He  see  dey  been  beating  her,  and  now  dey 
pile  up  de  driftwood  round,  and  he,  not  understanding" 
—the  missionary  explained,  with  an  air  of  forbearance— 
"he,  not  understanding,  he  try  to  interfere.  Dey  very 
mad  of  course.  Dey  send  for  me.  I  tell  Mr.  Mar  I 
know  dis  girl  have  vitched  a  baby  and  two  men.  De 
vomen  all  know  it— everybody  but  Mr.  Mar  know  it  quite 
veil.  Mr.  Mar  get  very  oxcited  and  say  he  not  believe  it. 
Dey  bring  de  baby;  he  say,  'Dat  a  sick  baby,  anyhow.' 
He  not  understand  at  all.  Dey  go  on  vid  making  de  fire. 
Mr.  Mar  yoost  goin*  to  do  someting  foolish,  vhen  de  girl 
cry  out,  'I  confess.  Yes,  yes,  I  do  all  dem  tings ! '  'Dere, 
you  see!'  I  tell  Mr.  Mar.  So  dey  make  de  vitch  go  and 
bring  de  little  pieces  vhat  she  cut  off  de  baby  coat,  and 
off  de  men's  clo'es  for  to  vitch  dem  vid.  Dey  all  holla 
vhen  dey  see  dose  tings.  All  but  Mr.  Mar.  He  say  de 
natives  dey  all  done  dat;  dey  all  steals  pieces  off  every 
body  in  the  settlemint ;  cause  dey  so  'f raid  anybody  get 
sick,  dey  be  called  vitches ;  and  if  dey  not  got  any  pieces 
to  give  up,  dey  know  dey  shall  be  burnt.  'So  dey  all 
keeps  plenty  'gainst  de  evil  day,'  says  Mr.  Mar. 

"He  mek  so  great  foos,  I  tell  dem  yoost  to  tie  de  girl 
so  she  not  wriggle  out,  and  leave  her  dere  like  dey  done 
Chuchuk  last  year.  So  dey  does  dat.  Ve  all  goes  avay. 

"Von  day  and  night.  Two  day  and  night.  Tree 
day  and  night.  Dat  girl  yoost  de  same.  Dey  cooms  to 
me  and  says,  'Somebody  gif  dat  vitch  to  eat.'  I  say 
nobody  vill  do  a  ting  like  dat.  Dey  say  dey  sure.  Next 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  173 

night  dey  vatch.  Dey  see  Mr.  Mar  go  down  vid  bread 
and  vater.  You  can  tink  dey  are  mad.  It  is  good  I  am 
dere.  I  say, '  Vait !  I  vill  talk  vid  Mr.  Mar. '  I  do  dat. ' ' 

His  faded  white-lashed  eyes  grew  sterner  still  as  he 
recalled  the  interview. 

"Well,  what  happened?" 

"It  vas  for  me  a  moment  of  great  responsibeeleetee. 
De  more  ve  talk,  de  more  I  see  it  ees  for  Mr.  Mar  a  mat 
ter  of  sentiment.  No!  of  nairves!  For  os  it  ees  a  matter 
of  religion.  Ve  live  vid  dose  people.  Ve  teach  dem.  Ve 
feed  dem  in  time  of  famine.  Ve  nurse  dem  ven  dey  are 
sick.  But  ven  dey  do  vat  the  Yakutat  voman  haf 
done-" 

His  low,  booming  voice  went  out  across  the  surf,  leav 
ing  behind  a  trail  of  menace  like  the  deadened  roll  of  a 
distant  gun. 

"What  then?" 

Cheviot's  eyes  were  held  by  the  fiery  look  on  the 
rugged  face.  Impossible  to  doubt  the  burning  sincerity 
that  gave  its  ugliness  that  moment  of  almost  uncanny 
power. 

"Mr.  Mar  see  it  no  good  to  say  dere  is  no  more  any 
vitches  vid  dat  Yakutat  voman  at  our  door.  So  he  say 
ve  shall  not  be  crool  even  to  a  vitch.  Den  I  tell  him,  'A 
man  also  or  a  voman  dat  haf  a  familiar  spirit  or  dat  is  a 
vizard  shall  surely  be  put  to  death ;  dey  shall  stone  dem 
vid  stones;  dere  blood  shall  be  upon  dem.  For  all  dat 
do  dese  tings  are  an  abomination  unto  de  Lord. '  ' : 

After  a  silence,  "What  did  he  say  to  that?"  Cheviot 
asked. 

"Hein— hn— hn!"  Christiansen  shook  back  the 
square  cut  hanks  of  tow  that  fell  from  under  his  hat. 


174  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"Not  even  Mr.  Mar/'  he  said,  with  an  air  of  triumph, 
"not  even  Mr.  Mar  talk  back  to  Moses!" 

But  the  good  man's  satisfaction  seemed  short-lived. 
He  was  grave  enough  as  he  went  on,  "Big  storm  in  de 
night.  Next  day  no  vitch  dere."  He  waved  a  great 
bony  hand  toward  Kamchatka. 

"Vitch  gone  off  vid  de  vind." 

Then,  lowering  his  voice  as  though  out  there  in  the  sea 
hollows  listeners  might  be  lurking,  he  bent  forward :  "  If 
dey  vas  to  know  Mr.  Mar  go  down  in  de  storm,  and  cut 
de  raw  hide  for  let  dat  vitch  go!—  "  Again,  with  grim 
foreboding,  he  shook  the  hanks  of  tow. 

"Ve  all  like  your  friend,  but  ve  sorry  see  any  yentle- 
man  tink  he  know  better  as  de  Bible." 


CHAPTER  X 

'HEVIOT  found  Hildegarde's  father  practi 
cally  a  prisoner. 

His  board  and  lodging  had  been  too  wel 
come  a  source  of  revenue  to  the  mission  for 
Christiansen  to  feel  called  upon  to  smooth  the 
way  for  his  departure,  and  Mar  had  been  some  time  in 
grasping  the  fact  that  his  plan  of  hiring  a  boat  and  a 
couple  of  natives  to  go  up  the  coast  for  a  "look  at  the 
country,"  was  hopelessly  knocked  on  the  head  since  his 
interference  in  the  matter  of  the  Yakutat  witch.  Not 
a  native  in  the  community  who  felt  safe  with  him  since 
that  episode.  The  lame  man  was  in  league  with  the 
powers  of  darkness. 

Mar's  pleasure  at  seeing  Cheviot  was  genuine,  but  not 
as  unmeasured  as  you  might  expect.  And  when,  almost 
before  the  first  shower  of  questions'  and  answers  had  begun 
to  abate,  Cheviot  flung  in  information  as  to  when  the 
next  ship  was  leaving  St.  Michaels,  Mar  assumed  the 
subject  to  be  of  interest  only  to  Cheviot.  Pressed  further 
about  his  own  plans,  the  elder  man  said  evasively  they 
were  not  very  settled,  and  changed  the  subject !  Cheviot 
was  nonplussed.  Was  Mar  only  waiting  till  they  were 
clear  of  the  Mission  House  ?  No,  for  they  were  out  fish 
ing  the  whole  of  the  next  day,  and  most  of  the  days 
following,  and  still  Mar  talked  of  any  and  everything 
save  of  going  home.  Was  he  waiting  for  funds  ?  Surely 

175 


176  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

not  now  that  Cheviot  was  at  hand.  He  seemed  inex 
plicably  satisfied  to  sit  all  day  over  a  trout  pool  up  the 
river  (despite  the  pestilential  mosquito),  or  in  a  boat 
in  the  bay  fishing  for  torn-cod ;  and  all  the  evening  play 
ing  chess  in  the  bare  mission  parlor,  in  the  midst  of  a 
company  sufficiently  singular.  Shady  fellows  from  the 
Galena  camp  above  White  mountain;  prospectors  ex 
pelled  from  Cook's  Inlet,  lousy,  filthy-smelling  natives 
come  upon  one  pretext  or  another,  weird  missionaries 
dropped  down  from  places  no  man  but  themselves  seemed 
ever  to  have  heard  of ;  a  reindeer-herder  in  the  Govern 
ment  service,  though  a  ' '  Scandahoojian, ' '  like  the  major 
ity  at  the  Golovin  Mission,  and  highly  welcome  albeit 
hardly  on  the  score  of  his  piety.  For  "Hjalmar,"  as 
Christiansen  called  him,  was  the  one  who  jibed  most  at 
the  morning  and  evening  prayers,  and  particularly  at 
the  long  grace  before  meat,  with  its  delicate  proposals  to 
the  Almighty  that  He  should  induce  those  present  to  save 
their  souls  by  giving  to  the  Golovin  Mission.  With  the 
same  breath  that  thanked  Him  for  "dis  dy  bounty/' 
the  Omnipotent  was  reminded  that  if  this  agreeable  state 
of  things  was  to  continue,  people  must  pay  not  only  for 
the  meal,  but  for  the  Cause. 

Mar  listened,  or  did  n't  listen,  with  an  air  of  respect 
ful  quiescence,  and  ate  his  meals  unabashed.  But  he 
commiserated  Cheviot,  "How  this  must  make  you  long 
for  your  Valdivia  luxuries.  Well,  when  do  you  go 
back?" 

''Whenever  you  're  ready." 

Mar  showed  as  little  gratitude  as  pleasure. 

"You  must  n't  think  of  waiting  for  me,"  he  answered 
shortly. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  177 

Cheviot  was  profoundly  perplexed  as  to  what  he  ought 
to  do.  Mar  was  not  a  man  that  any  one  could  comfort 
ably  catechize,  but  to  go  away  and  leave  him  here  with 
public  opinion  so  against  him;  for  Cheviot  to  present 
himself  to  Hildegarde,  knowing  he  had  left  her  father 
on  this  inhospitable  shore,  to  all  intents  and  purposes  a 
prisoner— it  was  not  to  be  thought  of. 

Mar 's  favorite  scheme  for  a  good  day 's  fishing  was  to 
row  across  to  the  river  mouth  where  some  Englishmen, 
several  years  before,  had  made  a  camp. 

In  the  sheltered  hollow  a  little  way  up  the  stream  they 
had  built  a  cabin,  so  well,  that  although  long  deserted  it 
still  offered  refuge  from  the  drenching  rain,  or  from  the 
unshut  eye  of  the  sun,  and  even  from  the  greater  torment 
of  mosquitoes.  For  Mar  had  learnt  the  value  of  the  Es 
quimau  use  of  a  "smudge."  On  the  way  to  the  cabin 
he  would  gather  two  handfuls  of  arctic  moss,  of  straw 
and  some  aromatic  smelling  herb,  twist  all  together  in 
two  wisps  and  set  one  alight  on  the  flat  stone  that 
formed  the  threshold  and  the  other  smoldering  in  a  rusty 
pan  upon  the  sill  of  the  single  window,  with  the  result 
that  the  mosquitoes  fled.  In  great  comfort  Mar  and 
Cheviot  would  proceed  to  make  tea,  and  eat  their  sand 
wiches—at  least,  Cheviot  ate  his.  He  noticed  that  al 
though  his  friend  never  disposed  of  a  third  of  what  he 
brought,  he  did  not  the  next  time  bring  any  less.  Quite 
suddenly  one  day  it  dawned  upon  Cheviot  why.  For 
although  the  crackers  and  cheese  and  sandwiches  that 
were  left  were  always  carefully  put  away  in  a  tin 
cracker-box,  the  box  on  their  return  was  invariably 
empty. 

And  Mar  never  seemed  the  least  surprised. 
12 


178  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

Was  it  that  he  could  not  bring  himself  to  abandon  the 
poor  wretch  he  had  rescued ;  could  that  be  at  the  root  of 
his  delay  ?  But  why  did  he  not  take  Cheviot  into  his  confi 
dence  and  get  the  girl  out  of  the  country  if  she  were  in 
hiding  hereabouts?  Was  it  conceivable  that  Mar- 
Cheviot  got  little  further  in  his  speculations  till  the 
morning  when  Mar,  in  the  act  of  making  a  cast,  said 
under  his  breath  and  without  moving  a  muscle, ' '  There  's 
that  fellow  again!" 

Cheviot  turned  just  in  time  to  see  Bjork 's  head  disap 
pear  behind  a  bunch  of  tall  reeds  that  grew  in  the  hollow 
by  the  little  fresh  water  stream  below  the  cabin. 
"What  's  he  lurking  about  like  that  for?" 

"I  'm  afraid  he  's  on  the  track  of  a  poor,  wretched 
girl,"  and  Mar  told  the  story  of  the  Yakutat  witch,  but 
with  additions  not  creditable  to  Mr.  Bjork. 

"It  's  usually  an  old  Avoman,  here  as  elsewhere,  that  's 
accused  and  set  upon,  but  this  girl  can't  be  above  seven 
teen,  for  she  had  n't  been  long  out  of  the  Bride's  House." 

"The  what?" 

"Oh,  the  horrible  igloo  where  they  confine  the  mar 
riageable  girls  for  half  a  year.  They  stay  in  there,  in  the 
dark  all  that  time,  never  seeing  the  face  of  man;  and 
they  come  out  cowed,  and  fat,  and  pallid ;  and  then  they  're 
for  sale  as  wives.  Those  that  no  man  takes  are  looked 
down  upon,  and  left  to  shift  for  themselves  and  must 
earn  their  own  living.  The  Yakutat  girl  was  pounced 
on  instantly  by  a  man  she  hated  for  some  reason.  He 
took  her  off,  but  she  escaped  and  made  her  way  to  the 
mission.  Nobody  was  at  home  at  the  time  but  Bjork  and 
me.  I  saw  her  come  in,  and  I  saw  her  come  flying  out 
of  the  mission  parlor  wilder  even  than  she  'd  entered  it, 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  179 

and  go  tearing  down  to  the  village.  She  found  shelter 
there,  for  a  while,  with  the  woman  who  had  brought  her 
up.  But  public  opinion  was  all  against  her;  and  when 
it  was  found  that  the  reason  her  'husband,'  Peddy- 
kowchee,  did  n't  come  and  get  her,  was  that  he  was  ill, 
they  said  she  had  bewitched  him.  His  younger  brother 
said  she  'd  done  the  same  to  him,  and  then  a  miserable 
little  baby— oh,  it  was  a  ghastly  business.  'Sh— "  and 
Mar  fished  in  silence  for  a  full  hour,  with  -occasional 
sharp  glances  through  the  alder  thicket  behind  him, 
down  among  the  reeds  by  the  deserted  cabin. 

The  next  day  the  store  left  in  the  cracker-box  was 
found  to  be  untouched. 

.  ' '  She    's  seen  B  jork ! ' '  said  Mar  under  his  breath. 
"She  's  afraid  to  come  any  more." 

"Why  don't  you  help  her  to  get  out  of  the  country ?" 
Cheviot  asked,  setting  alight  the  smudge  on  the  window- 
sill. 

"I  was  planning  that  when  you  came,  but  I  don't  want 
to  mix  you  up  in  any  such  ticklish  business." 

"It  's  no  more  ticklish  for  me  than  for  you." 

"Oh,  I  'm  blown  upon  already.  The  people  here  have 
been  red  hot  about  it.  They  have  n't  cooled  down  yet." 

"They  never  will,"  said  Cheviot. 

"No,"  agreed  Mar,  "but  I  've  made  the  cause  mine, 
you  see.  After  you  're  gone—" 

"I  'm  not  going  till  you  do." 

"That  '"s  nonsense." 

"If  you  like,"  said  Cheviot. 

"It  's  on  account  of  that  letter  of  Hildegarde 's  ?  " 

"Whatever  the  reason  is,  I  'm  going  to  stay  if  you  are, 
and  you  may  as  well  let  me  in  for  my  share  of  the  fun." 


180  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"Your  'share!'  '  repeated  Mar  reflectively,  and 
stroked  his  long  gray  mustache. 

"I  was  arranging  to  get  the  girl  away,"  he  went  on 
presently,  "when  you  came.  I  had  bought  this  boat  and 
made  a  habit  of  being  out  all  .day." 

' '  Exactly !    All  we  need  is  provisions. ' ' 

"No,  I  sent  Christiansen  to  St.  Michaels  for  provi 
sions.  They  're  at  the  mission  now." 

' '  Of  course,  we  brought  them  up  with  us !  Then  we  've 
nothing  to  do  but  to  get  the  stuff  into  the  boat. ' ' 

' '  Without  exciting  suspicion. ' ' 

' '  And  pick  the  girl  up  somewhere  on  the  coast. ' ' 

"  — before  they  realize  we  're  gone  for  good." 

' '  Surely  you  and  I  could  start  off  on  an  excursion  to 
gether  without  exciting  suspicion.  Why,  you  told  them 
when  you  first  came,  you  were  going  up  the  coast,  'to 
have  a  look  at  the  country/  "  he  added,  remembering 
Christianson 's  phrase. 

Mar  studied  him  an  instant  with  uncommon  intent- 
ness. 

"What  is  it?"  laughed  Cheviot.  "You  look  as  if  you 
could  n't  make  up  your  mind  to  trust  me." 

"No,  I  'm  making  up  my  mind  I  will."  Again  he 
paused  for  a  moment,  and  then,  ' '  I  am  too  old  to  do  the 
thing  alone,"  he  said. 

' '  Well,  I  can  manage  the  boat,  anyhow. ' ' 

"Oh,  the  girl  can  row  as  well  as  a  man,  but  I  must 
have  a  partner."  And  sitting  there  in  the  deserted 
cabin  Nathaniel  Mar,  for  the  last  time,  told  how  a  hun 
dred  and  odd  miles  further  up  the  coast  he  had  panned 
out  gold  with  a  dead  man's  help  when  he  himself  was 
young. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  181 

And  when  he  had  said  it,  that  thing  befell  him  that 
overtook  any  enthusiast  in  talking  to  Louis  Cheviot. 
Mar  saw  his  story  on  a  sudden  in  a  comic  light.  Clear 
now,  its  relationship  to  twenty  "tall  stories,"  fit  matter 
for  a  twitch  of  the  humorous  lip,  a  hitch  of  the  judicial 
shoulder. 

The  unconscious  Cheviot  had  choked  off  many  a  confi 
dence  just  by  that  look  of  cool  amusement. 

"I  Ve  always  said,"  Mar  wound  up,  preparing  hastily 
to  withdraw  again  into  his  shell,  "I  Ve  always  said  it 
would  'keep/  and  it  has  kept  close  on  thirty  years." 

"Well,  it  won't  keep  much  longer,"  said  Cheviot 
briskly. 

"Why  not?"  A  tremor  shot  through  the  man  with  the 
secret. 

' '  Why  ?    Because  it  's  in  the  air. ' ' 

Mar  clasped  and  unclasped  his  big  walking-stick  as  if 
about  to  rise. 

"Before  another  year,"  Cheviot  went  on,  "the  whole 
of  Alaska  will  swarm  with  prospectors. ' ' 

"Do  you  think  so?" 

"Sure.  Why,  it  's  begun.  I  don't  believe  there  's  a 
single  Yukon  tributary  where  there  is  n't  a  man  wander 
ing  about  this  minute  with  a  shovel  and  a  pan." 

The  Yukon !    Well,  that  's  a  good  way  to  the  south ! " 

:i  Those  men  that  stopped  at  the  mission  last  night— 
they  were  miners." 

"They-they  were  after  galena!"  said  Mar,  almost 
angrily.  "They  knew  that  fairly  good  ore  had  been 
brought  down  Fish  River  off  and  on  since  '81." 

Cheviot  laughed.  "Well,  if  you  imagine  they  won't 
so  much  as  look  for  gold,  let  's  smuggle  your  witch  to 


182  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

St.  Michaels  and  take  the  first  steamer  home.    I  've  had 
enough  of  the  North." 

"You  say  that  because  you  don't  really  believe  I  Ve 
discovered  a  second  Klondike." 

' '  Why  should  n  't  I  believe  it  ?  And  have  n  't  I  turned 
my  back  on  the  Klondike  we  all  know  exists  ? ' ' 

' '  Those  men  that  came  to  the  mission  yesterday, ' '  Mar 
said  hurriedly,  "they— they  were  going  to  Fish  River, 
were  n 't  they  ?  Not— not  up  the  coast  ? ' ' 

"No,  no,  that  's  all  right,"  Cheviot  reassured  him. 
"All  I  meant  was  that  somebody  hereabouts  had  only  to 
whisper  '  Gold ! '  for  this  whole  country  to  swarm. ' ' 

"I  know— I  know.  But  we  '11  have  the  start,  Che 
viot." 

Mar  pulled  himself  up  by  the  aid  of  his  stick,  and 
dragged  the  rude  soap  box  table  out  of  its  shady  corner, 
into  the  light  nearer  the  window,  a  light  but  little  ob 
scured  by  the  faint  smoke  wreaths  that  curled  about  the 
pan  and  sent  abroad  a  slightly  pungent  breath,  agreeably 
acrid,  except  to  the  summer  pest.  Mar's  excitement 
found  little  expression  in  his  face,  but,  so  to  speak,  came 
out  at  his  finger  tips.  He  could  hardly  hold  the  piece 
of  paper  he  had  pulled  from  his  pocket.  Up  to  ten 
minutes  ago  he  had  felt  almost  as  far  from  his  ancient 
purpose  as  though  he  still  sat  on  the  high  stool  in  the 
inner  room  of  the  Valdivia  bank.  Now,  and  within  the 
last  few  seconds  more  especially,  fulfilment  seemed 
breathlessly  near.  Sitting  on  one  side  of  the  soap  box, 
with  Cheviot  opposite,  Mar  traced  on  the  back  of  an 
envelop  the  land-locked  inner  Bay  of  Golovin,  the  outer 
bay,  and  from  Rocky  Point  a  broken  line  on  up  the  coast. 

"This,"  he  said,  shading  a  little  strip  bordering  the 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  183 

shore,  "this  is  the  sand-spit  where  I  found  the  Esquimau 
camp.  Here  '&  the  crooked  river,  with  its  mouth  full  of 
wood.  Only  six  or  seven  miles  to  the  north  is  the  anvil- 
shaped  mountain. " 

The  two  men,  bending  low  over  the  soiled  envelop, 
were  too  absorbed  to  notice  the  glitter  just  above  the  win 
dow-sill;  eyes  narrowed  to  evade  the  smoke;  two  mere 
points  of  light  to  the  right  of  the  rusty  pan  with  its  haze 
of  smoldering  incense. 

Mar's  pencil  whispered  over  the  paper  in  the  silence. 

Then  he  spoke.  ' '  From  this  broken  range  on  the  north 
three  or  four  streams  come  trickling  down  to  the  coast. 
The  one  on  the  west  here  winds  round  from  the  north 
side  of  the  Anvil,  and  it  was  just  at  this  point,  as  I  re 
member—just  here,"  and  the  pencil  shook  as  if  in  doubt, 
or  refusing  to  commit  itself,  till  Mar  planted  the  point  so 
firmly  on  the  paper  it  made  a  dent  as  well  as  a  mark. 
"Just  here  I  found  the  gold." 

When  finally  Cheviot  raised  his  eyes  the  glitter  was 
gone  from  the  sill. 

WHILE  the  two  in  the  cabin  laid  their  plans  and  made  a 
list  of  provisions  and  requirements,  a  man  was  creeping 
on  hands  and  knees,  through  willow  scrub  and  reeds, 
down  to  the  boat  that  lay  moored  in  the  cove  below  the 
cabin. 

Christiansen  sat  talking  to  Hjalmar  the  herder,  of  the 
Government  project  of  introducing  reindeer  among  the 
Alaskan  natives,  when  the  door  of  the  private  office  was 
flung  wide.  They  looked  round  and  saw  Bjork  standing 
there. 

On  the  sallow  mask  a  strange  light  shining.    The  hard 


184  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

lips  twitched  in  a  recurrent  rictus,  showing  a  dog-like 
gleam  of  sharp  eye-tooth,  while  the  rest  of  the  mouth 
held  rigid.  If  the  tremendous  force  that  locked  the  lean 
jaws  was  lost  upon  the  onlooker,  it  must  have  been  the 
insane  light  in  Bjork's  eyes  that  made  the  reindeer- 
herder  whisper,  "He  's  got  a  fit." 

But  Christiansen  had  only  flung  back  his  long,  straight 
hair,  and  grasped  the  rude  arms  of  his  big  chair. 

"Bjork,"  he  said,  "iss  it  a  visshun?" 

"Ye— h— h!"  Bjork  answered  through  shut  teeth. 
An  instant  longer  he  stood  silent,  with  his  hairy  hands 
clenched,  and  a  barely  perceptible  forward  and  back 
ward  swaying  of  the  tense  body.  Then,  with  an  effort  as 
of  forcing  steel  to  part,  he  opened  his  welded  lips  and 
said  rapidly  in  Swedish,  ' '  Have  we  not  fed  the  hungry  1 ' ' 

"Aye,"  said  Christiansen. 

1 '  Have  we  not  nursed  the  sick  ?  Have  we  not  preached 
the  Gospel  to  every  creature  ? ' ' 

"Aye,  aye,"  from  Christiansen. 

"Have  we  not  kept  the  law?"  With  each  question 
nearer  and  nearer  Bjork  brought  the  black  menace  of  his 
face. 

"Have  we  not  had  the  faith  that  moveth  mountains? 
Have  we  not  served  in  hardship  ?  Have  we  not  waited  in 
poverty  till  this  hour  1 ' ' 

"Till  this  hour?"  said  Christiansen,  getting  up  slowly 
out  of  his  chair. 

Bjork  arrested  his  own  dreamlike  advance  with  a  sud 
denness  that  seemed  to  wake  him.  He  stopped,  looked 
round,  and  clutched  at  the  back  of  a  chair. 

' i  Shut  the  door, ' '  he  commanded. 

His  chief  obeyed.    When  Christiansen  turned  round 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  185 

again,  Bjork  was  staring  over  the  reindeer-herder's  head, 
piercing  the  infinite  depths  of  space,  while  he  held  tight 
to  every-day  existence  by  the  back  of  a  chair. 

"Brethren,"  he  said,  "the  angel  of  the  Lord  has  been 
with  me.  He  has  shown  me  great  riches. ' ' 

Hjalmar  the  herder  pulled  himself  together  and  shook 
off  his  growing  nervousness.  There  was  nothing  uncanny 
in  this  after  all.  A  vision  of  riches  was  only  too  common 
since  the  Klondike  had  crazed  men's  brains.  Bjork  saw 
that  even  Christiansen  looked  less  moved. 

"I  tell  you,"  the  seer  burst  out,  "this  is  the  answer  to 
all  our  prayer,  the  reward  of  all  our  work.  The  angel 
took  me  westward  up  the  coast.  I  see  it  now ! "  He  un 
locked  his  clutching  hands,  raised  them  outstretched  on 
a  level  with  his  eyes  and  with  hypnotic  slowness  moved 
the  right  hand  east,  the  left  one  west. 

"A  sand-spit,"  he  said,  "where  the  heathen  gather. 
Beyond— a  flat  country,  where  no  tree  grows.  But  the 
river  mouth  is  choked  with  sea-drift.  A  strange  shaped 
hill.  One  of  old  Thor's  workshops.  Where  he  ham 
mered  the  sword  of  the  gods,  we  shall  forge  weapons 
against  the  ungodly.  Weapons  of  gold.  For  the  river  of 
that  country— the  angel  showed  me  the  sands  of  it !  And 
the  sands,  Christiansen,  the  sands  were  full  of  gold!" 

The  herder  looked  at  Christiansen  and  Christiansen 
looked  at  the  herder.  The  herder  shook  his  head. 

Christianson  sat  down  again  in  his  great  chair. 

"I  tell  you,"  said  Bjork  solemnly,  "I  see  that  'prom 
ised  land'  plainer  than  ever  I  saw  Kwimkuk.  Plainer"— 
he  raised  his  voice — "than  I  see  you  two." 

But  he  saw  them  very  plainly.  His  look  leaped  from 
one  face  to  the  other,  and  rage  gathered  on  his  own. 


186  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

' '  You  sit  there  like  stone.  You  are  deaf.  You  are  like 
dead  men.  I— I—  He  looked  about  the  room  wildly 
as  if  he  had  forgotten  where  the  door  was.  ' '  I  would  go 
alone,  but  I  must  have  provisions.  I  must  have  help 
with  the  boat— help  with  the— 

"Y— yes,  yes,"  stuttered  the  old  missionary. 

"And  the  angel  said,  'Go  first  to  Christiansen.'  3 

"Yes,  yes.    Of  course,  I— 

' '  l  But  tarry  not, '  said  the  voice.    '  If  Christiansen  re 
ceive  not  the  good  tidings,  go  take  the  news  to  another. '  ' 
He  seemed  now  to  locate  the  door.    He  made  two  steps  in 
that  direction,  saying,  "Me— I  obey  the  voice." 

"I,  too,  obey,"  said  Christiansen  hurriedly.  "I  will 
come  Saturday." 

"Saturday!"  Bjork's  burning  impatience  blew  the 
end  of  the  week  to  the  end  of  the  world.  * '  I  tell  you  to 
morrow  will  be  too  late !  It  must  be  to-day.  It  must  be 
this  hour. ' ' 

"Why?"  demanded  the  herder,  but  he,  too,  was  on  his 
feet. 

"  Ha !  You  will  ask  questions !  No  wonder  the  angel 
comes  to  me. ' '  Again  he  turned  about  and  rushed  at  the 
door.  Christianson  intercepted  him.  Bjork,  with  a  con 
vulsive  movement,  flung  him  off. 

1 '  The  voice  said,  *  This  is  the  hour  you  have  prayed  for, 
but  if  it  passes  in  idleness,  pray  no  more— pray  no 
more!'  "  Bjork's  voice  rang  out  with  a  tragic  authority. 
"  'For  this  is  the  hour  when  your  feet  should  be  shod 
with  swiftness  and  your  hands  be  full  of  cunning.'  It 
was  the  voice  said  so."  Bjork's  fingers  were  on  the 
latch.  "Me— I  obey."  He  opened  the  door. 

"Come,  Hjalmar,"  said  Christianson. 


"  '  Brethren,'  lie  said,  '  the  angel  of  the  Lord  has  been  with  me. 
He  has  shown  me  great  riches  ; ;; 


CHAPTER  XI 

JLDEGARDE'S  sense  of  anxious  responsi 
bility  had  grown  with  every  month  that 
passed  after  her  father  sailed  out  of  San 
Francisco  harbor.  Bound  for— "the  Klon 
dike!"  people  exclaimed  with  envy,  rather 
than  asked  in  any  doubt. 

"No— no,"  he  had  said,  and  then  hastily— to  keep  out 
siders  off  the  track— "well,  perhaps.  Who  knows?" 
Who  did  n't  know !  And,  after  all,  why  should  any  man 
stay  at  home  who  was  n  't  obliged  ? 

It  was  natural  that  no  one  else  should  take  Mr.  Mar's 
enterprise  as  seriously  from  the  start  as  did  his  daughter. 
For  she  knew  how  large  had  been  her  share  in  it.  She 
had  been  the  first,  the  only  one,  to  cheer  him  on.  She  it 
was  who  had  got  * '  the  boys ' '  to  finance  the  undertaking. 
She  who  had  broken  the  fact  to  her  mother.  But  for  his 
daughter,  Nathaniel  Mar  would  not  now  be— where  was 
he  ?  How  faring  ?  Many  a  time  Hildegarde  's  heart  con 
tracted  sharply,  as  in  silence  she  framed  the  question. 
Her  own  fault  that  she  could  n't  answer— her  fault  that 
half  Valdivia  could  no  longer  set  their  clocks  by  the  big, 
lame  man's  passing— her  doing  that  he  sat  no  more  of  a 
morning  in  the  warm,  sunny  room  of  the  San  Joaquin, 
sending  out  smoke  and  absorbing  news.  Others  sat  there 
in  peace  and  safety,  discussing  their  absent  townsman; 

187 


188  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

and  Hildegarde  sat  at  home  trying  to  keep  at  bay  the 
thought :  if  anything  dreadful  should  happen  to  him ! 

It  had  eased  her  a  little  to  write  to  Cheviot,  and  beg 
him  to  look  out  for  her  father.  She  was  tempted  to  say, 
"Bring  him  back  safe  and  there  's  nothing  I  won't  gladly 
do  to  prove—  But  she  had  pulled  herself  up  in  time, 
and  only  promised  an  unending  gratitude. 

The  steamer  President,  which  had  taken  Mar  north, 
brought  on  her  return  trip  a  brief  letter  from  him,  say 
ing  merely  that  the  journey  was  safely  accomplished  as 
far  as  St.  Michaels.  His  family  knew  they  would  proba 
bly  not  hear  again  till  the  following  summer. 

Life  was  easier  when  Bella  was  there.  To  her  one 
might  say,  ' '  Will  he  come  back  by  the  first  boat  in  June, 
or  shall  we  only  have  letters,  do  you  think  ? ' '  And  say 
it  in  one  form  or  another  so  often  that,  but  for  reasons 
unavowed,  the  speculation  would  have  wearied  friend 
ship. 

But  Bella  was  full  of  sympathy  and  tonic  suggestion, 
always  prepared  to  pore  over  northern  maps,  always 
ready  to  discuss  probable  conditions  '  *  up  there. ' ' 

What  a  friend  was  Bella!  "I  've  talked  of  a  stand 
ard,"  Hildegarde  thought  humbly,  "but  she  lives  up  to 
it— in  these  days. ' '  It  was  a  shame  ever  to  remember  the 
lapses  long  ago. 

And  how  intelligent  she  was!     How  curiously  well 
informed !    But  Bella  was  always  surprising  you. 

"I  keep  thinking  about  him  in  the  night.  I  lie  awake 
wondering  if  he  's  cold,"  Hildegarde  confessed,  and 
Bella,  why,  to  look  at  her  face  you  'd  think  she  knew  all 
about  that  lying  awake  and  wondering— did  the  same 
herself.  "Father  does  so  love  a  fire.  Don't  you  remem- 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  189 

ber  when  all  of  us  would  be  baking  he  used  to  draw  closer 
to  the  hearth?" 

"That  was  only  because  he  lived  so  much  indoors. 
He  '11  be  quite  warm  in  that  beautiful  furry  sleeping- 
bag.  He  11  probably  sleep  better  than  he  's  done  since 
he  was  a  child.  They  all  do. ' ' 

"Who  do?" 

"Oh— a— people  who— go  to  the  Klondike." 

Another  time,  ' '  I  am  haunted  by  the  certainty  that  he 
did  n't  take  enough  provisions.  Trenn  says  that  in  in 
tense  cold  people  eat  a  great  deal  more  than— 

"That  's  true,"  said  "Bella  sagely,  "but  it  '11  be  all 
right.  People  are  very  good  to  one  another  in  such  out- 
of-the-way  places.  They  always  share  with  anybody  who 
runs  short." 

' '  How  do  you  know  ? ' ' 

"Well,  that  's  what  the  accounts  all  say." 

"What  accounts?" 

"Oh,  in  the— the  papers." 

"I  never  see  any  such  accounts.  It  's  all  horrors — 
freezing  and  starving  to  death.  Besides,  father  will  be 
the  one  to  do  the  sharing  and  then  have  to  go  without. 
Oh,  why  did  I  help  him  to— 

"Don't  be  absurd,"  Bella  said,  almost  angrily.  "In 
any  case  he  's  not  gone  beyond  the  reach  of  supply  de 
pots. "  Neither  met  the  other's  eye. 

"But  suppose  his  money  gives  out — it  will  give  out  if 
it  's  true  they  charge  two  dollars  for  a  potato.  He  never 
could  keep  any  money  in  his  pockets.  Oh,  it  's  all  very 
well  for  you,  your  father  is  n't  sitting  on  an  iceberg 
starving  to  death. ' ' 

A  qu^er  look  came  into  Bella's  little  face.     It  was 


190  COME  AND  FIND  MB 

there,  now  and  then,  and  gone  like  a  ghost,  leaving  a 
troubled  tenderness  behind. 

"It  's  not  as  if  he  were  near  a  settlement,  as  the  Klon- 
dikers  are  to  Dawson  City, ' '  Hildegarde  went  on,  yearn 
ing  for  reassurance.  "The  place  father  was  going  to  is 
quite  uninhabited,  except  by  a  few  Esquimaux.  Often  I 
can  hardly  eat  for  thinking— thinking"— her  voice 
caught— "maybe  he  is  hungry." 

"That  's  impossible.  He  's  much  too  sensible  and 
clever. ' ' 

"What  good  is  it  to  be  sensible  and  clever  if  you  've 
got  nothing  to  eat?" 

"But  being  sensible  and  clever  will  help  him  to  find 
things  to  eat. ' ' 

"How  do  you  make  that  out?" 

"Oh,  as  far  south  as  that—" 

As  far  south  ?    Was  she  out  of  her  mind  ? 

"There  are  plenty  of  ptarmigan  and  rabbits  and 
things,  where  Mr.  Mar  is." 

"Are  there?  But  he  's  lame.  How  can  he  go  shoot 
ing-" 

' '  Other  people  can,  especially  the  natives,  and  you  may 
be  sure  your  father  will  have  his  share.  Besides,  he  '11 
fish.  Mr.  Mar  '11  like  that  part  of  it." 

' '  How  can  you  be  so  heartless ! ' ' 

"What  do  you  mean?" 

"How  is  my  father  to  fish  in  rivers  frozen  hard  as 
iron?" 

"Through  holes  in  the  ice,  of  course!"  Bella  de 
fended  the  idea  warmly.  "You  '11  see,"  she  spoke  as  if 
she  'd  personally  tested  the  efficacy  of  the  device; 
"you  11  see  they  '11  get  fish  all  winter  that  way." 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  191 

"How  do  you  know?  Now  don't  say  you  get  it  out  of 
the  newspapers,  for  I  never  see  these  things,  and  I  look 
for  nothing  else. ' ' 

' '  No,  I  found  that  in  a  book. ' ' 

"What  book?" 

It  turned  out  to  be  a  two-year-old  volume  upon  Arctic 
Exploration.  On  the  fly-leaf  Bella's  name  and  the  date, 
1896.  A  whole  year  before  Cheviot  went  to  the  Klon 
dike,  or  Mr.  Mar  to  Alaska.  The  year  that— 

The  light  that  had  glimmered  broke  in  a  flood. 

"Let  us  read  it  together,  Bella,"  said  Hildegarde 
softly. 

"No,  there  's  a  newer  one  I  Ve  just  sent  for.  We  11 
read  that  if  you  like. ' ' 

They  finished  it  at  the  Waynes'  country  place.  "I 
wish,"  said  Hildegarde,  "we  had  another  book  about—" 

"There  are  plenty  more."  Bella  unlocked  a  little 
chest.  It  was  full  of  nothing  but  books,  and  the  books 
were  about  nothing  but  arctic  life  and  exploration.  For 
nearly  two  years,  Bella  had  been  buying  and  reading 
everything  she  could  hear  of  published  on  the  subject  in 
America  or  Europe. 

Hildegarde  hung  above  the  store.  "We  must  go 
through  them  all  together.  It  is  the  most  fascinating 
reading  in  the  world. ' ' 

"It  is  the  most  horrible  in  the  world.  The  most 
ghastly,  it  makes  you  ill.  But,  yes ;  I  agree  with  you  one 
can't  not  know." 

They  read  the  books  together.  Even  the  honest-hearted 
Hildegarde,  who  began  with  her  father  agonizingly 
present  in  her  mind,  abandoned  him  presently  to  his 
probably  less  terrible  fate,  and  pushed  forward  with 


192  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

strange  men  on  their  farther  journey;  fitting  each  new 
fortune  or  mischance  to  the  One  on  the  other  side  of  the 
world,  never  mentioned  either  by  her  or  Bella.  Though 
Hildegarde  kept  her  oath  not  to  speak  Galbraith's  name, 
she  felt  a  strange  new  excitement  now  in  saying  "He" 
as  for  her  father,  yet  thinking  of  the  One  who  had  gone 
farther  afield  even  than  Cheviot,  and  much,  much  farther 
than  Mr.  Mar.  Each  girl  played  with  the  ruse.  It  gave 
to  reading  and  speculation  a  subtilty— a  spirit— that 
never  flagged. 

And  now  spring  was  here.  Although  still  far  too 
early  for  such  forecasting,  both  felt  the  need  of  return 
ing  to  Valdivia,  to  be  within  easier  reach  of  papers,  of 
telegrams,  and  of  returning  travelers.  For  all  the 
world  knew  when  once  the  spring  was  come  up  yonder, 
the  summer  followed  hard.  How  natural  it  was  to  be 
looking  forward  to  something  great  and  wonderful  that 
was  to  happen  in  June !  Hildegarde  and  her  father  had 
done  that  as  long  ago  as  when  the  girl  was  in  her  early 
teens  and  Jack  Galbraith  expected  back  from  his  first 
arctic  enterprise.  What  more  natural  than  that  Hilde 
garde  and  Bella  should  be  doing  very  much  the  same 
to-day.  To  call  their  expectation  by  Mar 's  name,  merely 
gave  it  manageability.  For,  apart  from  Bella's  inter 
diction,  the  word  "Galbraith"  was,  in  this,  like  a  hot 
iron.  If  it  were  to  be  touched  in  safety,  some  shield 
must  come  between  you  and  the  too  ardent  metal.  ' '  Gal 
braith"  would  scorch.  But  wrap  "Mar"  about  the  for 
bidden  name,  and  you  could  use  it  to  significant  ends. 

Summer  and  Mr.  Mar!  Oh,  Mr.  Mar  served  well  as 
symbol  of  that  mightier  issue,  that  both  dared  hope  for 
out  of  this  year's  opening  of  the  ice  gates  of  the  North. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  193 

And  yet  the  month  of  wonder,  June,  went  by  without 
a  word  or  a  sign  coming  down  from  the  top  of  the  world. 

July  brought  a  letter  from  the  Klondike— Cheviot's 
second.  He  had  done  well,  and  he  was  coming  home. 
Hildegarde  might  look  to  see  him  by  the  next  boat.  No 
word  of  Mar;  plain  he  had  n't  had  Hildegarde 's  news 
when  he  wrote.  Not  the  next  boat,  however,  nor  the 
next,  brought  Cheviot,  nor  any  word  of  Mr.  Mar. 

"I  don't  know  how  I  should  get  through  this  time 
but  for  you,  Bella."  Hildegarde  and  she  were  seldom 
apart. 

Not  till  mid- August  came  the  sign  from  Mar,  a  letter 
written  from  a  queer-sounding  place  in  early  June,  a 
letter  strangely  short  and  non-committal.  He  had 
reached  St.  Michaels  too  late  the  previous  autumn  to  go 
any  further  than  Golovin  Bay,  before  navigation  closed. 
He  would  push  on  as  soon  as  travel  was  practicable. 
He  was  well.  He  sent  his  love.  And  no  more  that  sum 
mer.  No  more  up  to  the  time  the  boats  stopped  running 
in  the  autumn. 

Cheviot  had  not  come  after  all.  And  silence,  like  the 
silence  of  the  grave,  wrapt  the  fate  of  that  Other,  on  the 
far  side  of  the  world. 

"I  shall  burn  a  joss  to  those  who  travel  by  land  or  by 
sea,  by  snow  or  by  ice,"  said  Bella,  one  day  in  Decem 
ber,  and  she  lit  the  stick  of  incense  on  the  flower  altar, 
whence  no  heathen  smoke  of  prayer  had  risen  for  a 
couple  of  years  now.  But  more  prayers  than  ever  before 
had  been  offered  up  in  the  little  white  room.  And  what 
need  of  a  face  on  the  wall  above  the  roses  ?  The  picture 
was  not  really  shut  away  in  a  drawer.  Vivid  in  each 
girl's  mind,  it  was  borne  about  as  faithfully,  as  in  the 

13 


194  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

old  days,  when  on  Hildegarde's  breast  in  a  setting  of 
silver  it  hung  on  a  velvet  string. 

Now  and  then  Bella  remembered  Cheviot,  and  when 
she  remembered  him,  she  spoke  of  him.  Sometimes  she 
spoke  of  him  when  she  was  thinking  of  him  little  enough. 
As  on  the  night  when  she  was  n't  well,  and  Hildegarde, 
sleeping  on  the  sofa  in  her  friend's  room,  had  waked  in 
misery  over  a  dream  she  'd  had.  Bella  was  lying  wide- 
eyed  in  the  dark,  "A  dream  about—  ?" 

1  "Yes,"  Hildegarde  said  hurriedly,  "a  snow-storm  in 
the  night,  in  the  wind;  a  slipping  down  into  blackness. 
I  thought  I  saw  him  fall,  and  I  knew  it  was  the  end. ' ' 

"They  go  by  contraries.  Your  father  's  quite  well 
and  happy."  Hildegarde  had  not  said  the  dream  con 
cerned  her  father,  but  she  offered  no  correction. 

' l  Still, ' '  Bella  went  on,  ' l  for  the  moment  it  makes  one 
feel— I  '11  tell  you!  we  must  have  a  little  light  to 
comfort  us." 

"No,  no;  it  will  hurt  my  eyes,"  Hildegarde  was  sur 
reptitiously  crying.  But  Bella  was  already  up,  and  be 
fore  Hildegarde  could  forestall  her,  she  had  opened  the 
door  across  the  hall  leading  into  the  opposite  room,  and 
there  she  was  striking  a  light.  Hildegarde  followed  her, 
still  a  little  dazed  by  the  vivid  horror  of  the  dream,  and 
when  her  eyes  fell  upon  her  own  little  white  bed,  she 
flung  herself  down  there,  and  buried  her  face  in  the  cool 
pillow. 

"You  are  n't  crying,  are  you,  Hildegarde,  over  a  silly 
dream?  Look  here,  I  'm  lighting  a  joss  for  Mr.  Mar." 

A  little  silence. 

"I  've  lit  another,"  said  Bella's  hurried  voice,  still 
over  there  by  the  table,  "one  for  Louis."  Hildegarde, 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  195 

with  face  half-hidden,  imagined  rather  than  saw,  that 
three  slender  smoke  feathers  were  curling  above  the 
flowers,  drowning  the  meeker  fragrance  of  the  roses. 

She  lay  there  feeling  the  oppression  of  the  dream  fad 
ing,  and  a  waking  oppression  take  its  place.  Yes,  they 
"went  by  contraries."  Galbraith  had  n't  fallen  and 
been  swallowed  in  the  gaping  maw  of  a  crevasse;  but 
when  he  came  back,  what  was  going  to  happen?  He 
belonged  to  Bella.  But  he  had  left  Bella.  And  he  had 
belonged  first  of  all  to  Hildegarde.  What  would  befall 
friendship  in  that  coming  wrench! 

"Go  back  to  bed,  Bella;  you  '11  be  worse. " 

"You  must  come,  too." 

Hildegarde  made  no  answer. 

"You  can't  lie  there  with  all  these  flowers  in  the 
room.  I  did  n't  know  you  had  n't  set  them  out.  The 
doors  can't  be  left  open  either." 

"The  windows  can." 

'  *  I  shan  't  go  unless  you  come,  too. ' ' 

Hildegarde  forced  herself  to  get  up.  Bella  put  out 
the  comforting  light.  But  some  things  show  plainer  in 
the  dark.  Those  symbols  on  the  altar,  they  were  only 
tendrils  of  smoke  by  day,  or  in  the  glare  of  gas.  Now 
they  were  sparks  of  fire  puncturing  the  blackness  of  the 
scented  room.  One  fiery  eye  to  watch  over  the  fortunes 
of  Nathaniel  Mar,  one  to  shine  for  Cheviot,  and  an  un 
named  third  to  pierce  the  darkness  that  shrouded  the 
fate  of  that  Other.  Even  when  the  two  girls  turned 
their  backs,  and  groped  their  way  to  Bella's  room  cling 
ing  hold  of  each  other  in  the  dark,  the  third  spark  not 
only  shone  before  their  inner  vision  still,  it  pricked  each 
bosom  with  its  point  of  fire. 


196  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

What  would  happen  when  he  came  back? 
Each  wondered,   and  each  held  faster  to  the  other 
with  fear  in  the  bottom  of  her  heart. 

MEANWHILE,  life  outwardly  went  on  pretty  much  the 
same.  With  Trenn  and  Harry,  Eddie  Cox  and  other 
swains,  the  girls  went  to  parties  and  picnics,  to  concerts, 
and  the  theater,  and  did  all  the  usual  things.  The  one 
unusual  thing  those  days  brought  was  the  Charles  Tren- 
nor  fancy  ball.  It  was  going  to  be  a  great  affair,  and 
Valdivia  conversation  for  weeks  had  begun  by  some 
such  statement  as,  "I  'm  going  as  the  Goddess  of  Lib 
erty.  WThat  shall  you  be  1 " 

Of  course  Trenn  and  Harry  were  coming  up  for  the 
great  occasion,  and  their  costumes  called  for  endless  con 
sultation  with  that  great  authority,  Bella.  They  had, 
moreover,  told  their  sister  she  might  on  this  occasion  be 
as  glorious  as  ever  she  liked,  and  they  would  "foot  the 
bill."  Hildegarde  deeply  appreciated  such  generosity, 
but  what  was  more  to  the  point,  did  Bella  ? 

She  only  said:  "Yes,  Hildegarde  's  going  to  be 
glorious.  But  I  don't  think  it  's  the  kind  of  glory  you 
can  buy." 

Even  before  the  Mar  boys  had  come  forward  in  this 
magnificent  way,  Bella  had  decided  that  Hildegarde 
must  go  as  Brunhild.  Her  gown  was  to  be  white  cloth, 
embroidered  with  silver  dragons— strictly  adapted  from 
an  ancient  Norse  design.  She  was  to  wear  silver  sandals 
on  her  feet ;  on  one  bare  arm  would  be  a  buckler,  a  spear 
in  her  right  hand,  and  on  her  fair  hair  a  silver  helmet. 

Bella  was  going  as  Amy  Robsart,  and  that  was  easy 
enough.  It  was  those  dragons  of  Hildegarde 's  that  took 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  197 

the  time;  and,  as  Bella  had  said,  they  would  n't  have 
been  easy  to  buy.  She  and  Hildegarde  were  embroider 
ing  them  every  spare  minute,  day  and  night.  Even 
now,  though  almost,  they  were  not  quite  done,  which 
was  a  pity.  Trenn  and  Harry  were  coming  up  from 
Siegel's  again  this  evening— the  excuse,  the  necessary 
inspection  of  Brunhild,  at  Bella's  express  invitation. 
For  this  had  been  the  one  costume  not  ready  in  time  for 
the  ' '  dress-rehearsal ' '  two  nights  before,  when  Bella  and 
"the  boys"  had  put  on  their  Elizabethan  finery,  and 
peacocked  about  in  great  spirits. 

"I  want  your  brothers  to  be  what  they  call  ' knocked 
silly'  when  they  first  see  you,  Hildegarde.  You  must 
be  all  dressed  and  ready,  and  we  can  turn  up  the  bottom 
of  the  skirt  and  work  at  that  last  dragon  while  we  're 
waiting. ' ' 

In  pursuance  of  this  plan,  the  two  girls  had  gone  up 
stairs  directly  after  supper,  though  it  was  hardly  prob 
able  the  boys  could  get  there  before  half -past  nine. 

Mrs.  Mar  sat  waiting  for  them  in  the  parlor,  on  that 
side  of  the  center  table  where  the  book  rest  supported 
an  open  volume.  She  rocked  while  she  waited,  and  she 
crocheted  while  she  rocked.  At  times  she  glanced  at  the 
clock— not  once  at  the  open  book.  Not  for  her  own 
edification  was  the  volume  there,  but  for  the  enlarge 
ment  of  Hildegarde 's  literary  horizon,  while  she  and 
Bella  stitched  at  silver  dragons.  But  this  latest  choice 
in  standard  works  had  not  pleased  any  one.  Victor 
Hugo  was  much  too  fond  of  fiery  love-scenes  to  prosper 
with  Mrs.  Mar,  but  the  miserable  man  had  become  a 
classic,  and  after  all,  Hildegarde  was  old  enough  not  to 
be  infected.  Bella— she  read  everything,  the  minx! 


198  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

Although  Hildegarde  was  in  her  twenty-fifth  year,  Mrs. 
Mar  knew  her  so  little,  she  felt  no  assurance  that  the 
girl  would  keep  up  her  languages,  or  read  "the  best 
things"  in  any  tongue,  without  her  mother's  dragging 
her  by  main  force  across  the  flowery  fields  of  belles 
lettres— as  though  over  stubble  and  through  brake. 

Listening  to  Mrs.  Mar's  reading  of  a  classic  was  an 
experience  of  some  singularity.  For  if  she  macerated 
descriptive  bits  with  a  chin-chopper  despatch,  to  get 
them  out  of  the  way  (not  disguising  the  fact  that  she 
considered  these  passages  in  the  light  of  the  salutary 
self-torture  that  no  disciplined  life  should  evade,  any 
more  than  vaccination  or  a  visit  to  the  dentist),  she  did 
far  deadlier  things  to  scenes  of  sentiment  or  passion. 
These  she  approached  with  a  sturdy  determination  not 
to  give  in  to  their  nonsense,  to  make  them  at  all  events 
sound  like  sanity  by  sheer  force  of  her  own  impregnable 
common-sense— a  force  so  little  to  be  withstood,  that  it 
could  purge  the  most  poetic  page  ever  written.  It  made 
even  Victor  Hugo  sound  as  reasonable  as  the  washing 
list.  If  you  did  n't  inwardly  curse  or  secretly  weep, 
you  must  have  laughed  to  see  how  effectually  she  could 
clip  fancy's  wings,  slam  the  door  on  sentiment,  bring 
high  passion  down  to  a  sneaking  shame,  and  effectually 
punish  a  great  reputation.  In  short,  listening  to  Mrs. 
Mar  reading  romance  was  so  sure  a  way,  not  only  to 
strip  it  bare  of  its  traditional  glory,  but  to  rob  it  of 
every  chance  of  ' '  going  home, ' '  that  Hildegarde,  as  soon 
as  she  got  wind  of  what  was  the  next  work  to  be  at 
tacked,  hastened  to  borrow  it  of  Bella,  devoured  it  alone, 
and  so  got  a  first  impression  that  could  more  or  less  hold 
its  own  against  the  maternal  onslaught.  It  is  but  fair 


COME  AND  FIND  MB  199 

to  say  that  to  any  comedy  passage  Mrs.  Mar  gave  excel 
lent  effect,  and,  by  way  of  appreciation,  a  grim  smile 
peculiarly  her  own;  while  for  a  spirited  encounter  be 
tween  wits  sharp  and  merciless,  she  had  open  approval. 

"That  's  something  like!"  she  would  say.  "Old 
Dumas"  (or  whoever  it  might  be),  "he  can  do  it  when 
he  likes!"  and  the  great  one  was  patted  on  the  back: 
"This  man  's  going  to  live." 

Bella  had  known  that  Mrs.  Mar  would  sit  in  the  half- 
light  till  even  she  could  see  no  longer.  But  Hildegarde 
was  not  suffered  to  make  her  entrance  in  the  dusk.  Bella 
ran  in  first  and  "lit  up."  She  did  not  stop  to  draw  the 
blinds,  she  was  in  too  great  a  hurry ;  besides,  it  was  nice 
to  let  in  the  mild  and  beautiful  night.  "Now,  Hilde 
garde  !  Look,  Mrs.  Mar, ' '  and  Bella  ushered  in  a  living 
page  from  an  old  Icelandic  Saga;  "is  n't  she  glorious  t" 

Mrs.  Mar  pecked  at  the  regal  figure  with  her  hard, 
bright  eyes,  "White  does  n't  make  her  any  slimmer," 
she  said. 

"Oh,  it  would  n't  do  for  Brunhild  to  be  a  mean, 
little,  narrow  creature." 

"That  helmet,  too!    It  makes  her  look  ten  feet  high." 

"She  wants  to  look  high!— and  'mighty!'  and  she 
does.  No,  no,  stop  Hildegarde,  you  must  n't  take  it 
off.'" 

"Just  till  we  hear  the  boys  coming.     It— it    's— 
Hildegarde  contracted  her  broad  brows  under  the  hel 
met's  weight. 

But  Bella  flew  to  the  rescue.  "Don't,  don't!  Hands 
off !  What  does  it  matter  if  it  is  heavy  1  You  must  get 
used  to  it.  You  've  got  to  be  a  heroine ! "  she  wound  up 
severely,  "so  don't  expect  to  be  comfortable!"  and 


200  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

Bella  pulled  a  chair  under  the  drop-light.  "Sit  here 
where  Trenn  and  Harry  can  see  you  the  minute  they 
open  the  door.  Now  we  can  go  on  with  the  last  dragon 
while  we  're  waiting. ' ' 

Mrs.  Mar  cleared  her  throat,  "  -Acte  Cinquieme.  La 
Noce.'  :  And  the  two  girls,  raising  their  eyes  from 
the  work,  saw  through  the  open  window,  in  front  of 
them,  not  the  close-massed  syringa  underneath,  nor  the 
soft  Calif ornian  night  above,  but  "une  terrasse  du  palais 
d'Aragon,"  in  the  town  of  Saragossa,  four  hundred 
years  ago.  And  no  sense  visited  them  of  any  jarring 
contrast  between  the  picture  of  the  world  in  the  yellow- 
backed  book,  and  the  picture  of  life  as  they  knew  it  best. 
Thanks  to  the  poet  that  lives  in  most  young  hearts,  even 
Victor  Hugo's  gallant  vision  of  a  civilization  that  was 
old  before  California  was  discovered,  brought  no  envious 
sense  of  the  difference  between  then  and  now— rather 
a  naive  surprise  that  those  others  so  far  away,  so  long 
ago,  should  have  understood  so  well. 

Older,  more  self-critical,  they  might  have  lost  this 
sense  of  comradeship— might  have  gone  over  to  the  gray 
majority  that  insists  only  the  past  is  picturesque,  or  that 
if  any  grace  remains  unto  this  day,  it  must  needs  be  far 
removed  from  places  we  know  well,  precariously  sur 
viving  under  other  skies,  speaking  an  alien  tongue. 
Those  who  would  persuade  us  there  is  no  scene  in  our 
every-day  life  but  what  is  sordid,  barren,  or  at  best 
(and  worst)  meanly  commonplace— stuff  unfit  for  poetry 
or  even  for  noble  feeling— what  do  the  carpers  by  such 
comment  on  our  times  but  confess  an  intellect  abject, 
slavish,  blind.  To  find  the  beauty  and  the  dignity  that 
lie  in  the  difficult  familiar  days  that  we  ourselves  are 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  201 

battling  through,  to  detect  high  courage  in  the  common 
speech,  to  get  glimpses  of  the  deathless  face  of  romance 
as  we  go  about  the  common  streets,  is  merely  to  know 
life  as  it  is,  and  yet  to  walk  the  modern  world  as  glori 
ously  companioned  as  any  Viking  or  Hidalgo  of  the  past. 

So  true  is  early  youth's  apprehension  of  these  things, 
that  not  even  Mrs.  Mar  could  make  wide  enough  for 
envy  or  embarrassment  the  gulf  in  the  two  girls'  minds 
between  an  Old  World  bandit  chief,  and  a  New  World 
soldier  of  fortune.  The  transition,  that  to  the  sophis 
ticated  seems  grotesque,  between  the  Hernani  of  1519 
and  the  modern  American  pursuing  perilous  ways  to  the 
Pole— this  feat  was  accomplished  without  misgiving,  al 
though  in  Saragossa, ' '  on  entend  des  fanfares  eloignees, ' ' 
and  in  Valdivia  an  indefatigable  woman,  on  the  other 
side  of  the  street,  was  strumming  the  old  tune,  renamed, 
' '  The  Boulanger  March ' ' ;  and  now  Mrs.  Mar  was  begin 
ning  Scene  III  with  an  air  of  cold  distrust,  that  Bella 
foresaw  would  mount  by  well-known  degrees  to  a  climax 
of  scorn. 

The  lady  turned  the  page. 

"  'Mon  ame 
Brule— Eh!  dis  au  volcan  qu'il  etouffe  sa  flam  me/ — 

"How  long  are  they  going  on  like  this,  I  wonder?"  she 
interrupted  herself  to  durchblatter  the  pages. 

"  'Ah!  qui  n'oublierait  tout  a  cette  voix  celeste!'  " 

And  more  fingering  of  the  leaves.  "Four  more  solid 
pages  of  this  sort  of  thing,"  she  announced.  "Well,  if 


202  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

the  rest  of  the  world  has  stood  it,  I  suppose  we  must." 
And  she  went  on— 

"  'Ta    parole    est    un    chant   ou   rien    d'humain    ne 
reste-'" 

And  on,  in  a  measured  staccato,  exactly  as  if  she  were 
adding  up  a  column  of  figures,  or  telling  off  yards  of 
tape. 

"  'Dona  Sol. 

Viens,  6  mon  jeune  amant, 
Dans  mes  bras.'  ' 

Bella  dropped  the  silver  dragon,  and  with,  "Wait, 
Mrs.  Mar,  dearest  Mrs.  Mar ! ' '  she  seized  the  book. 

"What  's  the  matter  with  you?" 

"This  is  my  part!"  said  Bella,  shutting  the  volume 
convulsively.  ' '  I  know  it  every  bit. ' ' 

' '  '  Voila  notre  nuit  de  noces  commencee ! 
Je  suis  bien  pale,  dis,  pour  une  fiancee  ? '  : 

And  on  to— 

"  'Mort!  non  pas!  nous  dormons, 

II  dort!  c'est  mon  epoux,  vois-tu,  nous  nous  aimons, 
Nous  sommes  couches  la.    C  'est  notre  nuit  de  noce. 
Ne  le  reveillez  pas,  seigneur  due  de  Mendoce, 
II  est  las.    Mon  amour,  tiens-toi  vers  moi  tourne. 
Plus  pres— plus  pres  encore— 

Hildegarde,  with  tears,  put  out  her  hand  and  took 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  203 

Bella's.  No  word,  just  the  clasp  of  hands,  till  they  fell 
apart  to  work. 

"H'm,"  said  Mrs.  Mar  dryly.  "I  suppose  you  've 
seen  Sarah  Bernhardt  go  on  like  that." 

"No,  oh,  no.  I  don't  like  Sarah  in  this.  I  do  it  much 
better." 

"A  good  many  people  seem  to  be  able  to  put  up  with 
the  other  lady." 

But  Bella,  smiling,  shook  her  head,  as  she  drew  a  new 
strand  of  silver  thread  through  her  needle.  "I  don't 
like  seeing  her  make  dear  Dona  Sol  so— so  snaky,  and  so 
wildly  unnatural." 

"Well,  if  you  think  Dona  Sol  's  natural—" 

Bella  laughed.  "You  'd  think  she  was  nature  itself 
compared  to  Sarah." 

"People  said  the  same  thing  about  Curly  what  's-his- 
name. ' ' 

"Curly?" 

"Yes,  the  Englishman  who  acted  with  the  red-haired 
woman. ' ' 

"Oh,  you  mean  Kyrle— 

"Curl!  Is  that  how  he  calls  himself?  Well,  I  'm 
sure  I  've  no  objection.  I  liked  him.  But  people  went 
about  saying  he  was  n't  natural." 

Bella  looked  up.    "Did  you  think  he  was?" 

"Certainly  not.  But  I  'm  a  person  who  likes  acting. 
I  don't  want  them  natural."  She  wound  up  in  a  tone 
of  delicious  contempt,  "I  can  see  people  being  natural 
every  day  of  my  life,  without  paying  for  it. ' ' 

Bella  laughed.  "Oh,  I  'm  so  glad  I  know  you,  dear 
Mrs.  Mar ! ' '  That  lady,  unmoved  by  the  tribute,  began 
to  do  her  duty  by  the  notes.  Bella  never  listened  to 


204  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

notes,  and  by  and  by  her  little  face  took  on  again  the 
tragic  look  with  which  she  had  declaimed,  "La  fatalite 
s  'accomplit. ' ' 

Bella  was  a  good  deal  changed  in  this  last  year.  Hil- 
degarde,  looking  at  her  paling  beauty,  was  sometimes 
stricken  with  fear.  ' '  What  should  I  do  without  her ! ' ' 

The  postman's  ring.  Bella  jumped  up  without  cere 
mony  in  the  middle  of  Note  2,  and  ran  out  to  see  what 
had  come.  Only  a  paper.  It  was  n't  the  postman. 
Merely  the  little  boy  outrageously  late  with  * '  The  Even 
ing  News. ' ' 

Bella  returned  to  her  dragon— Mrs.  Mar  read  on. 

After  all,  who  could  be  sure  but  what  that  paper  lying 
there— how  did  Bella  know  but  it  had  a  Norwegian 
telegram  in  it,  saying  word  had  come  of  the  rescue  in  the 
arctic  of  a  party  of  Russians  under  an  American  leader  ? 
Or  no,  the  leader  had  done  the  rescuing— against  awful 
odds.  Not  Bella  alone,  but  two  entire  continents  were 
celebrating  his  name.  For  this  was  the  intrepid  explorer 
of  whom  nothing  had  been  heard  for  nearly  four  years 
—who  had  been  given  up  for  dead,  by  all  but  Bella 
Wayne. 

And  this  man— oh,  it  made  the  heart  beat— this  man 
had  discovered  the  Pole.  That  was  why  he  'd  been  so 
long  away.  It  took  four  years  to  discover  the  Pole.  But 
it  was  done.  The  whole  civilized  world  was  ringing  with 
his  name.  And  natural  enough.  It  was  the  greatest 
achievement  since  Columbus'  own,  and  the  hero's  name 
was— 

No,  no,  it  would  n't  be  like  that  at  all.  He  would 
want  Bella  to  be  the  first  to  know.  The  next  ring  at  the 
door  would  be  a  telegram  for  her.  Or  no,  he  would 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  205 

hardly  want  to  break  so  long  a  silence  in  that  brusque 
way.  No,  he  would  write  her  a  beautiful  long  letter— 
telling  her— explaining—  No !  Far  more  like  him  just 
to  appear.  Without  writing— without  telegraphing. 
Just  take  the  swiftest  steamer  across  the  Atlantic,  and 
the  fastest  train  across  the  Continent,  and  some  evening 
like  this,  she,  little  thinking  it  the  hour  that  should  bring 
such  grace,  she  would  lift  up  her  eyes  and  there  he 
would  be!— standing  before  her.  Not  only  without  a 
long  explanatory  letter,  without  words,  her  face  would 
be  hidden  in  his  breast. 

' '  There  ! ' '  Mrs.  Mar  interrupted  an  alternative  solilo 
quy  of  Don  Carlos,  and  Bella  started.  ''They  're  early ! 
There  are  the  boys,  now ! ' ' 

"I  don't  hear  them."  But  as  Hildegarde  spoke  the 
words  she  was  conscious  of  steps  on  the  graveled  path, 
that  wound  its  rather  foolish  way  round  this  side  of  the 
house,  leading  nowhere.  No  one  ever  walked  there  but 
Hildegarde  herself,  cutting  or  tending  flowers.  She 
glanced  at  Bella,  and  saw  in  the  wide  hazel  eyes  a  light 
she  knew. 

On  the  step  came  crunching  gravel.  Bella's  needle 
arrested  half  through  a  stitch,  and  all  Bella's  face  say 
ing,  "John!  John  Galbraith!"— and  only  Hildegarde, 
through  her  eyes,  hearing.  But  even  Mrs.  Mar  was  un 
der  some  spell  of  silence  and  strained  expectation.  Now 
the  firm  tread  paused,  and  there— there,  in  front  of  the 
low  uncurtained  window,  above  the  syringas,  showed  the 
head  and  shoulders  of  a  man.  Not  Trenn,  not  Harry. 
Who?  Hildegarde  held  her  breath. 


CHAPTER  XII 

[AS  it— could  it  be?"  Bella  asked  mutely, 
with  wildly  beating  heart. 

Hildegarde,  too,  was  wide-eyed  and  pale, 
though  even  in  the  dusk,  plain  to  see  the 
vigorous  upstanding  figure  was  not  a  bent 
old  man's.  Bella  felt  the  happy  blood  come  flooding 
back  about  her  heart ;  only  to  ebb  again  with  a  sudden 
ness  so  mighty,  that  it  seemed  to  withdraw  from  her,  not 
gladness  only,  but  volition  and  all  feeling— seemed  to 
want  to  carry  out  life  itself  upon  its  backward  tide. 

For  the  man  had  trodden  down  the  flowers  in  the  bor 
der,  and  pushed  his  way  through  the  syringa  thicket. 
He  stood  at  the  open  window,  looking  in. 

"Well,  Mr.  Louis  Cheviot,"  said  Mrs.  Mar,  with  an 
affectation  of  calmness,  "where  did  you  drop  from?" 
And  then  Hildegarde 's  helmeted  figure  rose  up  like 
some  spirit  of  woman  out  of  another  time.  But  she 
stood  quite  still,  and  she  looked  as  if  she  knew  she  was 
dreaming. 

Cheviot  vaulted  over  the  low  sill,  and  came  toward 
her  with  eyes  of  wonder.  ' '  What  's  all  this  for  ?  Why 
are  you  like  that?"— but  he  had  grasped  her  hand. 

' '  That  absurd  thing  on  her  head  ?  It  was  to  show  the 
boys, ' '  explained  Mrs.  Mar.  l '  A  ball— ' ' 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  207 

"Are  you  sure  you  are  you?"  Hildegarde  found  her 
voice  at  last. 

"Much  surer  than  I  am  that  you  are  you.  I  saw  your 
light  from  the  street,  and  I  felt  I  could  n  't  possibly  wait 
to  go  round  and  ring  the  bell.  I  thought  I  must  come 
and  look  in  and  see  what  you  were  like,  though  I  must 
say  I  did  n't  expect— "  He  was  shaking  hands  with 
Mrs.  Mar  now,  but  he  glanced  over  his  shoulder  at  the 
tall  white  figure  and  past  it  to  Bella.  "I  believe  I  Ve 
succeeded  in  scaring  at  least  one  of  the  party.  How  do 
you  do,  Bella  ?  Feel  me.  I  'm  not  a  ghost ! ' ' 

"My  dear  boy,"  interrupted  Mrs.  Mar,  speaking  in 
her  most  matter  of  fact  tone,  "sit  down  and  tell  us  all 
about  it. ' '  She  at  all  events  was  not  too  agitated  to  put 
her  marker  in  the  book  before  she  closed  it,  and  she  took 
up  her  crochet. 

Hildegarde  was  still  standing  there,  but  she  had  taken 
off  the  helmet  and  held  it  in  her  hand.  "Are  you— are 
you  alone  ? ' '  she  asked. 

"Yes,  alone." 

"I  suppose  you  Ve  heard  nothing  of  Mr.  Mar?"  said 
Mrs.  Mar,  who  had  never  in  her  life  been  heard  to  refer 
to  that  gentleman  in  any  more  intimate  fashion. 

"Oh,  yes,  I  have."  Cheviot  sat  down.  Hildegarde 
still  stood  there.  "I  was  with  him  between  five  and  six 
months. '  ' 

' '  With  father !    Has  he  been  to  the  Klondike,  too  1 " 

"No;  but  I  Ve  been  to  Golovin." 

"Your  last  letter,  nine  months  ago,  said  you  were 
coming  by  the  next  boat,"  Mrs.  Mar  arraigned  him. 

"Yes,  but  I  had  n't  heard  from  Hildegarde  when  I 
wrote  that." 


208  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"What  difference  did  that  make?" 

"The  difference  of  my  following  her  suggestion  to 
look  out  for  Mr.  Mar.  I  had  to  go  to  Golovin  to  do  it. ' ' 

"Is  that  where  he  is  now?"  demanded  his  wife. 
"Why  on  earth  has  n't  he  written?" 

Cheviot  felt  in  his  inner  pocket,  as  he  said,  "No,  Mr. 
Mar  's  at  Nome." 

"At  Nome!" 

"He— he  's  not  ill?"  faltered  Hildegarde. 

"No,  on  the  contrary,  he  's  better  than  he  's  been  for 
years. ' ' 

"Then  what  on  earth  's  he  doing  at  Nome?"  de 
manded  Mrs.  Mar.  "Why  did  n't  he  go  to  the  place 
he  's  been  talking  about  for  all  these—" 

"He  did." 

"Well?"  and  then,  with  her  peculiar  incisiveness, 
"What  's  he  got  to  show  for  it  all?" 

Cheviot  did  not  wonder  that  Mar  would  rather  not 
return  to  face  that  particular  look  in  the  polished  onyx 
eyes.  "I  don't  know,"— he  hesitated— "that  there  's 
very  much  to  show— as  yet." 

' '  It  ought  n  't  to  surprise  anybody. ' '  The  lady  turned 
the  highly  polished  stones  in  her  head  with  an  added 
glitter. 

"When  is  he  coming  home?"  asked  Hildegarde,  with 
a  pitiful  lip. 

' '  Perhaps  next  summer. ' ' 

* '  Perhaps ! ' '  echoed  the  girl. 

Even  Mrs.  Mar  stopped  crocheting  a  moment.  "Hush, 
Hildegarde.  Let  him  tell  us."  But  she  must  not  be 
supposed  to  be  over-anxious.  "Have  you  just  come? 
Have  you  had  anything  to  eat  ? ' ' 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  209 

"Oh,  thank  you— in  the  train.  First  of  all,  I  must 
give  you  the  letters  he  's  sent."  He  handed  one  to 
Mrs.  Mar,  and  one  to  Hildegarde.  Another  he  laid  on 
the  table  under  the  lamp.  It  was  addressed  to  Messrs. 
Trennor  and  Harry  Mar.  Mother  and  daughter  hur 
riedly  read  and  exchanged  letters. 

"Well,  Miss  Bella,  how  's  the  world  treating  you?" 
and  Cheviot  talked  on  in  his  old  half-ironic  fashion  to 
the  pale  girl  putting  away  a  heap  of  tangled  silver 
thread  in  a  work-box. 

Mrs.  Mar's  eye,  grown  even  harder  and  brighter  in 
the  last  moments,  fell  upon  the  envelop  under  the  lamp. 
She  did  not  scruple  to  tear  it  open.  But  there  was  little 
enlightenment  even  in  the  epistle  to  "the  boys." 

"He  says  you  '11  give  us  the  particulars."  Mrs.  Mar 
flung  the  notice  at  Cheviot  as  if  plainly  to  advertise  her 
intention  to  hold  him  responsible  if  those  same  particu 
lars  were  not  reassuring. 

Cheviot  told  briefly  how  he  had  found  Mr.  Mar  at  the 
mission,  how  an  eavesdropper  had  overheard  their  pri 
vate  talk,  and  how  Mr.  Mar  reached  his  journey's  end 
only  to  find  that  the  thirty-year-old  secret  had  been 
filched  from  him,  and  other  men  (who  had  n't  known  it 
but  three  days),  how  they  had  gathered  in  the  harvest." 
"Not  all— surely  father  got  something?" 
"By  the  time  he  reached  Anvil  Creek  he  found  it 
staked  from  end  to  end. ' ' 

Mrs.  Mar  was  plying  the  crochet-needle  with  a  rapid 
ity  superhuman.    "Of  course  he  'd  be  too  late,"  she  said, 
with  a  deadly  quietness.    "Give  him  thirty  years'  start,' 
and  he  '11  be  too  late." 
"It  was  an  outrage  that  a  handful  of  men  should 


210  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

have  been  able  to  gobble  the  entire  creek,"  said  Cheviot 
hurriedly.  "The  laws  will  be  changed,  beyond  a  doubt. 
They  're  monstrous.  Every  miner  has  been  able  to  take 
out  a  power  of  attorney,  and  he  could  locate  for  his  en 
tire  family,  for  all  his  friends— even  for  people  who 
don't  exist." 

' '  And  those  missionaries  took  it  all ! " 

"Not  the  missionaries.  They  were  chivvied  out  of  the 
game  by  a  reindeer  herder  they  'd  let  into  the  secret. 
It  's  too  long  a  story  to  tell  you  now,  but  the  herder 
gave  the  missionaries  the  slip,  and  got  word  to  some 
friends  of  his.  The  rascals  formed  a  district  and 
elected  a  recorder.  By  the  time  we  got  there,  there 
was  n't  an  inch  left  for  the  man  who  'd  discovered  the 
gold." 

In  the  pause  Hildegarde  hunted  wildly  in  her  mind 
for  something  to  say— something  that  would  prevent  her 
mother  from  speaking— but  the  girl's  tongue  could  find 
no  word,  her  mind  refused  to  act. 

Fortunately,  the  story  had  reduced  even  Mrs.  Mar  to 
silence. 

"In  the  end  Christiansen  and  Bjork  did  n't  fare 
much  better  than  Mr.  Mar,  though  I  believe  they  got 
something.  But  the  herder  and  his  friends  are  mil 
lionaires.  ' ' 

It  was  more  than  one  of  the  company  could  bear.  Mrs. 
Mar  got  up  and  left  the  room. 

Cheviot  met  Hildegarde 's  eyes.  There  was  that  in  his 
face  that  gave  her  the  sense  of  leaning  on  him  in  spirit 
—of  being  in  close  alliance  with  him. 

"Poor,  poor  father!"  she  said,  in  a  half  whisper. 
"Does  he  take  it  dreadfully  to  heart?" 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  211 

"Well,  you  can  imagine  it  was  n't  an  easy  thing  to 
bear." 

"No,  but  why  is  n't  he  here— we  '11  all  help  him  to 
bear  it." 

Cheviot  looked  at  the  door  through  which  Mrs.  Mar 
had  disappeared.  His  eyes  said  plain  as  print,  "Will 
she?" 

"But  father  must  come  home!"  Hildegarde  broke  in 
on  the  eloquent  silence,  as  though  upon  some  speech  of 
Cheviot's.  "What  is  he  thinking  of— he  does  n't 


mean—" 


Her  agitation  was  so  great  she  hardly  noticed  that 
Bella  had  finished  putting  the  things  away  in  the  work- 
box,  and  was  leaving  the  room.  The  moment  she  had 
shut  the  door,  "He  can't  face  it,"  said  Cheviot. 

"Oh,  but  that  's  madness.  He  must  be  told  that  we— 
that  I— he  must  come  home.  Why,  it  's  the  most  dread 
ful  thing  I  ever  heard  of  in  my  life,  his  bearing  it  all 
alone."  Her  tears  were  falling.  "Tell  me— there  's 
nothing  in  the  letters— Louis,"— she  leaned  forward— 
"you  and  I  always  tell  each  other  the  truth,  don't  we?" 

"I  'm  afraid  we  do,"  he  said,  with  his  old  look. 

"Then  tell  me  ivhat  's  in  father's  mind.  What  has  he 
said  to  you  ? ' ' 

"That  he  will  stay  up  there  till— somehow— he  has 
either  made  his  pile,  or  made  his  exit." 

The  girl  laid  her  head  down  beside  the  shining  helmet 
on  the  table,  and  wept  convulsively. 

"I  had  to  tell  you."  Cheviot  had  come  close  to  her, 
and  his  voice  was  half  indignant,  half  miserable. 

Blindly  she  put  out  a  hand  and  grasped  his  arm. 
"  Thank  you— you— you  have  been  good.  His  letter  to 


212  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

me  says  that  you— that  you— Louis!"  Suddenly  she 
lifted  her  wet  face,  "I  am  'unendingly  grateful.'  ' 

"Well,  I  hope  you  '11  get  over  it."  He  drew  his  arm 
out  of  her  grasp,  and  walked  about  the  room. 

Hildegarde  followed  him  with  tear-wet  eyes  that  grew 
more  and  more  bewildered.  "I  can't  understand  how 
you  're  here.  I  thought  navigation  would  n't  be  open 
for  a  month." 

''Nearer  two." 

"Then,  how— how— " 

"I  came  out  with  dogs  over  the  ice." 

She  stared  incredulous.    "How  did  you  come?" 

"Round  the  coast  of  Norton  Bay,  down  across  the 
Yukon,  and  over  to  the  Kuskoquim,  and  then  by  the  old 
Russian  route  to  Kadiak  Island." 

' '  How  in  the  world  did  you  know  the  way  ? ' ' 

' '  Part  of  the  time  I  had  native  guides. ' ' 

"Was  n't  it  a  very  terrible  journey  1" 

"I  don't  know  that  I  'd  do  it  again." 

"And  when  you  got  down  to  Kadiak  Island?" 

' '  I  waited  a  week  for  the  boat. ' ' 

' '  They  run  in  winter ! ' ' 

"Yes.  Kadiak  comes  in  for  a  swing  eastward  of  the 
warm  Japanese  current.  The  boats  ply  regularly  to 
Sitka." 

"It  must  have  taken  you  a  long  time  to  do  all  that 
first  part  on  your  own  two  feet. ' ' 

He  did  n't  answer. 

' '  When  did  you  see  father  last  ? ' ' 

"On  the  morning  of  the  8th  of  December,  when  I 
cracked  my  whip  over  my  dog-team  and  turned  my  back 
on  Nome." 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  213 

' '  Heavens !    Why,  that  's— ' ' 

''Over  three  months  ago."  Most  men  would  have 
paused  a  moment  for  contemplation  of  their  prowess  or 
at  least  of  their  hardships,  but  Cheviot  was  ready  to  put 
his  achievement  at  once  and  for  ever  behind  him— 
ready,  not  only  to  imagine  the  general  interest  some 
where  else,  but  to  lead  the  way  thither.  "To  be  exact, 
it  was  three  months  and  sixteen  days  ago;  but  your 
father  was  all  right  when  I  left  him,  and  he  had  sup 
plies." 

"Has  he  any  friends?" 

"He  's  got  a  dog  he  's  very  thick  with,  and  he  's  got  a 
comfortable  tent." 

"A  tent,  in  that  climate!" 

"It  's  all  anybody  has.  No  lumber  for  cabins;  little 
even  for  sluices,  hardly  enough  for  rockers— to  rock  out 
the  dust,  you  know.  Wood  is  dearer  than  gold. ' ' 

"A  tent!" 

"I  assure  you  there  was  only  one  thing  he  was  really 
in  want  of." 

"What  was  that?" 

"Some  way  to  get  word  to  you.  He  knew  you  'd  be 
anxious.  He  wants  you  not  to  take  his  failure  to  heart. 
He  thinks  a  great  deal  about  that,  because  he  says  you 
helped—" 

"Yes,  yes." 

"He  wanted  me  to  make  it  quite  clear  to  you  that  in 
spite  of  everything  he  was  n  't  sorry  he  'd  tried  it.  And 
you  must  n't  be  sorry  either.  You  must  write  to  him, 
Hildegarde,  and  reassure  him. ' ' 

She  nodded  and  turned  away  her  face,  but  she  put  up 
her  hand  like  one  who  cannot  bear  much  more. 


214  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"He  was  afraid  you  were  fretting  about  him.  I  never 
saw  him  more  awfully  pleased  and  glad  than  when  I 
made  up  my  mind  to  come  out  over  the  ice. 

"That  appalling  journey!    You  did  it  for  him?" 

"No,  I  didn't." 

He  waited,  as  if  for  a  sign,  and  then,  speaking  almost 
surlily,  "I  did  it  for  myself,"  he  said.  "I  'd  been  away 
long  enough." 

"Yes,"  said  Hildegarde,  "yes,  indeed." 

"I  could  n't  bear  it  any  longer,  sitting  there  in  the 
dark  and  cold,  and  the"— she  raised  her  eyes— "the— 
oh,  it  's  not  such  a  bad  place  as  people  make  out ;  if  you 
are  n't  eating  your  heart  out  to  know— 

"What  's  father  doing?"  she  asked  hastily. 

"Waiting  to  hear  from  you.  Waiting,  like  everybody 
else,  for  the  ice  to  go  out. ' ' 

"What  will  he  do  when  the  ice  goes  out?" 

"He  's  got  some  claims,"  Cheviot  lowered  his  voice 
to  say.  "He  does  n't  want  anybody  but  you  to  know, 
for  fear  there  's  nothing  in  them.  But  as  soon  as  the 
frost  is  enough  out  of  the  ground  to  yield  to  pick  and 
shovel,  he  means  to  rock  out  a  few  tons  of  gravel  and  see." 

"Do  it  himself !"— then,  as  Cheviot  did  not  answer  at 
once,  "It  's  simply  dreadful!  It  's-  I  can't  bear  it." 
She  hid  her  face. 

"Don't,  Hildegarde.    I  wish  you  would  n't  cry." 

' '  Are  you  going  back  there  ? ' ' 

"No,  oh,  no;  I  'm  not  even  going  back  to  the  Klon 
dike."' 

Mrs.  Mar  opened  the  door  behind  them.  "It  must  be 
hours  since  you  made  that  miserable  meal  in  the  train," 
she  said.  "Come  in  here  and  have  some  supper." 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  215 

Cheviot  would  have  declined  but  that  he  knew  he  must 
some  time  submit  to  a  tete-a-tete.  Best  get  it  over. 

After  the  dining-room  door  shut  behind  her  mother 
and  Cheviot,  Hildegarde  still  sat  there.  The  only 
movement  about  the  white  figure  under  the  lamp  was 
the  salt  water  that  welled  up  constantly  and  con 
stantly  overflowed  the  wide,  sad  eyes.  The  handle 
of  the  other  door  turned  softly— a  girl's  face  looked 
in. 

"Bella"— the  motionless  figure  rose  out  of  the  chair 
and  the  one  at  the  threshold  came  swiftly  in.  "Bella" 
—the  voice  was  muffled— "my  father— my  father 
does  n't  mean  ever  to  come  home." 

The  incoming  figure  stopped.  "Do  the  letters  say 
that?"  Bella  asked,  awestruck. 

* '  No,  Louis  says  so. ' ' 

"Well,  I  think  it  was  very  heartless  of  him." 

"No,  it  was  n't.  I  made  him.  It  would  have  been 
infinitely  worse  to  be  always  waiting." 

"To  be  always  waiting  is  perhaps  the  worst,"  said 
Bella,  with  lowered  eyes. 

"Yes,  worst  of  all." 

Bella  roused  herself  and  came  nearer  to  her  friend. 
"But  for  Mr.  Mar— why,  it  's  impossible— don't  you  be 
lieve  it,  dear.  It  's  absurd  to  think— 

"He  '11  never  come  back.  You  '11  see  he  '11  never 
come  back,  unless—" 

"Unless?" 

"Unless"— Hildegarde  cleared  her  tear-veiled  voice— 
' '  unless  some  one  goes  and  brings  him  home. ' ' 

"Louis  Cheviot?" 

"Don't  you  see,  he  's  failed.    He  's  been  enormously 


216  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

kind;— he  's  been  wonderful,  but  he  could  n't  get  my 
father  to  come  home." 

"Are  you  thinking  one  of  the  boys  might?" 

Hildegarde  shook  her  head.  "They  could  n't  make 
him." 

"Who  could?" 

She  looked  round  the  room  with  eyes  that  again  were 
filling.  But  they  came  back  to  Bella's  face.  "Father 
would  do  it  for  me/'  she  said;  "don't  you  know  he 
would?" 

"Well,"  said  the  other,  staring,  "if  not  for  you,  for 
no  one." 

"Yes,  yes,  he  'd  do  it  for  me!"  Hildegarde  moved 
about  the  room  with  a  restlessness  unusual  in  her.  She 
went  to  each  window  in  turn,  pulled  down  the  blinds 
and  drew  the  curtains;  and  still  she  moved  about  the 
room.  Excitement  had  drunk  her  tears.  Her  face  was 
full  of  light. 

Bella  did  not  stir,  but  no  look  or  move  of  Hildegarde 's 
escaped  her.  She  fixed  her  eyes  on  the  gleaming  dragons 
that  crawled  at  the  hem  of  Hildegarde 's  skirt.  The 
voices  in  the  next  room  were  audible,  but  not  the 
words. 

Across  the  street  the  tireless  female  had  again  struck 
up  her  favorite  march. 

' '  You  'd  have  to  go  alone, ' '  Bella  said  presently. 

"Yes,  I  'd  have  to  go  alone." 

"It  's  an  awful  journey." 

1  i  I  suppose  so. ' ' 

"Yes,  and  the  people— the  roughest  sort  of  people." 

"I  would  n't  be  afraid— at  least,  not  much." 

"/  should  n't  dare  to." 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  217 

"No,  no,  you  're  younger.  And  besides,  even  if  I  were 
the  younger,  I  'm  the  one  who  could  do  it. ' '  Not  often 
that  Hildegarde  laid  herself  open  to  a  charge  of  ar 
rogance.  ''Yes,"  she  said,  with  rising  excitement,  "I 
could  do  it,  only"— and  the  high  look  fell— " it  costs  a 
great  deal."  She  stood  quite  still  looking  down  upon 
Brunhild's  shield,  that  showed  on  the  dark  carpet  like 
a  tiny  circular  pool  of  gleaming  water.  Still  that  mad 
dening  piano  over  the  way!  "The  boys  would  n't  help 
me,"  Hildegarde  thought  out  loud,  "they  Ve  already— 
they  '11  be  disgusted  enough  as  it  is."  She  sat  down, 
still  with  her  eyes  on  the  shield,  as  if  she  did  n't  dare 
lose  sight  of  it  a  moment.  "Of  course  mother  would  n't 
dream—"  After  a  little  pause,  "And  Louis  would  say 
I  was  mad.  But  I  must  think— I  must  think!"  She 
leaned  her  tilted  chin  on  her  hand,  and  still  like  one 
hypnotized  she  stared  at  the  metal  disk  shining  there  in 
the  shadow.  "I  must  find  a  way.  Father  shall  not  be 
left  up  there  another  winter. ' ' 

Nothing  more,  till  Bella  brought  out  quite  low  the 
words,  ' '  I  could  get  you  the  money. ' ' 

"Bella!"  Hildegarde  dropped  her  hand  and  sat 
back.  "Would  youV 

Instead  of  answering,  "I  would  n't  dare  to  go  my 
self,"  Bella  said. 

' '  Oh,  you  could  n 't  possibly. ' '  (Had  Bella  really  meant 
that  she  might  lend—)  "Even  if  there  were  any  need 
of  it,  you  could  n't  go."  Hildegarde 's  lips  only  were 
saying  words,  her  mind  was  already  faring  away  on  an 
immense  and  wonderful  journey,  that  she— she  was  com 
petent  to  undertake.  "You  are  n't  the  kind,  anyway," 
she  wound  up  bluntly,  coming  back. 


218  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"Nobody  would  think  you  were  the  kind  either— no 
body  but  me." 

"Yes,  yes.  You  've  always  understood  that  I  was  n't 
a  bit  like  what  people  thought,"  and,  indeed,  few  who 
supposed  they  knew  Hildegarde  Mar  but  would  have 
been  surprised  at  the  look  in  her  face  to-night,  for  once 
betraying  not  alone  a  passionate  partizanship  with  her 
father's  stranded  and  embittered  existence,  but  the  glow 
that  even  the  thought  of  "going  to  the  rescue"  may 
light  in  a  generous  heart,  and  reflect  in  the  quietest  face. 

"You  could  do  anything  you  meant  to,"  said  Bella, 
marveling  a  little  at  the  new  beauty  in  her  friend,  ' '  any 
thing.  But  this— you  'd  have  to  be  very  brave  to  go  on 
such  a— '' 

"No,  I  would  n't.    I  long  to  go." 

No  great  surprise  to  Bella  after  all,  this  admission 
that  Hildegarde,  the  reticent,  the  cold,  was  really  burn 
ing  with  all  sorts  of  eagerness  that  had  never  been  suf 
fered  expression. 

But  there  was  something  more  here  to-night.  Like 
many  another,  Hildegarde  could  have  gone  through 
hardship  and  suffering  for  the  sake  of  any  one  she  loved, 
but  the  look  on  her  face  as  she  sat  there  under  the  light, 
revealed  the  fact  that  this  journey  Bella  shrank  from 
even  thinking  of,  that  Hildegarde  herself  had  called 
"appalling,"  made  yet  its  own  strange  appeal  to  the 
girl,  apart  from  love  of  her  father,  independent  of  the 
joy  of  service. 

"You  think  if  I  did  it,  it  would  be  because  I  'm  brave 
and  a  good  daughter,  and  things  like  that.  No,  it  's 
none  of  those  things.  It  's  because,  while  other  people 
have  been  going  to  New  York  and  to  Mexico,  to  London 


COME  AND  FIND  MF  219 

and  to  Paris,  and— and— the  farthest  places,  while  they 
traveled  north,  south,  east,  west,  I  Ve  sat  here  in  this 
little  house  in  Valdivia,  and  sewed  and  planted  a  garden 
and  heard  everybody  else  saying  good-by,  and  listened 
to  that  woman  over  the  way  playing  'Partant  pour  la 
Syrie,'  and  have  still  stayed  here,  and  sewed,  and  gar 
dened,  and  only  heard  about  the  world.  I  Ve  done  it 
long  enough!  I  'm  going  to  the  North,  too!"  Hilde- 
garde  stood  up  with  eyes  that  looked  straight  forward 
into  space.  A  movement  from  the  other  seemed  to  bring 
the  would-be  traveler  back.  ' '  If  anybody  will  help  me, ' ' 
she  said,  turning  her  eyes  on  Bella's  face. 

The  younger  girl  was  on  her  feet.  In  the  silence  the 
two  moved  toward  each  other.  Bella  lifted  her  arms  and 
threw  them  about  Hildegarde's  neck.  "I  Ve  told  you 
I  '11  help  you." 

' '  I  love  you  very  much  already,  but  if  you  'd  do  that 
for  me—  The  shining  eyes  pieced  out  the  broken 
phrase. 

Bella  turned  her  graceful  little  head  toward  the  din 
ing-room  door.  Cheviot  had  raised  his  voice.  But  they 
could  n  't  hear  the  words. 

''There  's  only  one  thing"— Bella  spoke  in  a  whisper 
—"just  think  a  moment;  all  those  hundreds  of  miles 
with  a  dog  team  over  the  ice,  in  an  arctic  winter.  If 
anybody  else  had  done  such  a  thing  we  should  never 
have  heard  the  last  of  it.  The  world  would  n't  be  long 
in  having  another  book  on  heroism  in  high  latitudes. 
But  we  all  know  that  man" — she  moved  her  head  in  the 
direction  of  the  voice— "we  '11  never  hear  of  it  again. 
He  's  done  that  gigantic  journey  just  for  you,"— Hilde- 
garde  disengaged  herself— "and  to  be  with  you  again. 


220  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

And  here  you  are  planning  to  go  away.  It  is  n't  my 
business,  but  I  think  you  '11  be  making  a  terrible  mis 
take,  Hildegarde,  if  you—" 

Her  friend  turned  from  her  with  unusual  abrupt 
ness. 

"He  's  nicer  than  ever,"  Bella  persisted.  "He  's 
charming.  I  always  said  so. ' ' 

"And  I  always  said" — Hildegarde  stopped  and  looked 
at  Bella  with  an  odd  intentness.  "You  're  a  nicer  girl 
than  you  used  to  be. ' ' 

"Thank  you,"  said  the  other,  smiling  faintly,  but  she 
saw  that  she  had  failed. 

"And  I  don't  mean  because  you  're  willing  to  help 
me  in  this." 

"What  do  you  mean?" 

"There  'd  be  only  one  thing  that  could  prevent  my 
letting  you  lend  me  the  money." 

"Well,  you  certainly  need  n't  worry  about  paying  it 
back." 

"It  would  take  two  or  three  years,  but  that  could  be 
managed  now  that  Trenn  and  Harry  want  to  give  me  an 
allowance.  It  is  n  't  that. ' ' 

Bella  waited  wondering. 

"It  is  that  I  could  n't  take  a  great,  great  help  from 
you,  and  go  so  far  away,  carrying  anything  in  my  heart 
that— that  I  'd  kept  hid— anything  that  concerned  you." 

A  quick  fear  leapt  into  Bella's  face. 

* '  For  one  might  n 't  come  back,  you  know, ' '  the  other 
added. 

"There  's  only  one  thing  we  've  never  straightened 
out, ' '  said  Bella,  ' '  and  that  's  my  tangle. ' ' 

"I  have  my  share  in  the  thing,  I  mean.    But  as  I  said, 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  221 

you  could  n't  do  now— what  you  did— when  you  were 
little." 

' '  Oh ! "  Bella  drew  a  sharp  breath  of  relief.  ' '  When 
I  was  little  I  know  I  was  a  beast. ' ' 

"You  told  Louis  Cheviot  about  the  altar,  and  the 
patron  saint ;  about— 

"Yes/'  said  Bella  hastily.  "It  was  pretty  mean  of 
me,  but  I  was  only  twelve. ' ' 

"It  was  n't  only  when  you  were  twelve."  Gratitude, 
common  prudence,  should  have  bridled  Hildegarde's 
tongue,  but  there  was  something  of  the  judgment  day 
about  this  hour.  Hearts  must  needs  be  opened  and  se 
crets  known.  "It  was  after,"  she  went  on,  driven  by 
this  new  necessity  to  leave  nothing  hidden  if  she  was  to 
take  Bella^s  help,  "it  was  six  years  after— when  you 
were  eighteen.  You  had  gone  away  knowing  quite  well 
how— how  I  was  feeling  about—  You  knew  how  I  was 
feeling.  Yet  you  could  write  pretty  heartlessly,  con 
sidering  all  things.  That  gay  letter  about  your  engage 
ment.  You  could  write  with  that  insincere  air  of  ex 
pecting  me  to  be  as  happy  as  you  were. ' ' 

"You  surely  see  it  would  have  been  unpardonable  of 
me  to  have  sympathized  with  you.  I  had  to  assume  you 
did  n  't  care.  You  would  have  done  the  same. ' ' 

"No,  I  wouldn't." 

Bella  looked  at  her.  "That  's  true,"  she  said,  quite 
low.  "You  would  have  shown  that  you  were  sorry  for 
me,  even  in  the  middle  of  being  happy  yourself.  You 
could  have  done  it  and  not  hurt.  But  I  could  n't.  I 
did  n't  know  how.  The  nearest  I  could  come  to  it  was 
just  to  pretend  I  thought  you  'd  got  over  it— that  you 
did  n't  care  any  longer." 


222  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

They  looked  at  each  other  a  moment  without  speak 
ing.  Bella  with  quivering  face  glided  forward. 

"Dearest,  dearest"— she  took  Hildegarde's  hand,  she 
caught  it  to  her  breast.  "You  are  n't  going  to  let  him 
—the  Other— spoil  two  lives!" 

"At  least  I  'm  ready  to  risk  what  's  sure  to  happen." 

"What  's  sure  to  happen?" 

"His  coming  while  I  'm  away."  Hildegarde  flung 
out  the  words  with  a  passion  Bella  had  never  seen  in  her 
before.  "Yes,  that  's  what  will  happen.  I  shall  have 
waited  for  him  at  home  here  all  my  life  till  this  sum 
mer.  And  this  summer,  while  I  'm  gone,  he  11  come  to 
Valdivia.  You  '11  see!  He  '11  come." 


CHAPTER  XIII 

\0  prevision  of  Hildegarde 's  as  to  Cheviot's 
disapproval  of  her  plan  approached  the  de 
gree  to  which  he  fought  against  her  going 
to  the  North. 

Mrs.  Mar,  secretly  dismayed  at  her  hus 
band's  willingness  to  stay  away  indefinitely,  was  not  ill- 
content  for  once  to  see  the  "  stolid  Hildegarde"  stirred 
to  action.  It  satisfied  a  need  in  the  mother,  that  the 
daughter  had  never  ministered  to  before.  Hildegarde 
was  the  sort  of  girl  who  could  take  excellent  care  of 
herself,  and  her  health  was  superb.  She  had  no  impor 
tant  concerns  such  as  the  boys  had  to  chain  them  at  home. 
She  was  not  the  mother  of  a  family,  nor  even  president 
of  the  Shakspere  Society.  The  welfare  of  the  Hindus 
would  be  wholly  unaffected  by  her  departure.  The  jour 
ney  was  quite  unlike  that  terrible  one  involved  in  going 
to  the  Klondike.  It  could  be  made  in  a  comfortable 
ship ;  the  whole  of  it  by  sea.  Her  mother  would  go  with 
her  to  the  steamer,  and  Hildegarde  would  stay  on  board 
till  her  father  met  her  at  the  Alaskan  port. 
But  they  had  all  reckoned  without  Cheviot. 
He  refused  to  take  the  idea  seriously  at  first,  and  when 
he  did — oh,  he  was  serious  enough  then ! 

' '  The  maddest  scheme  that  ever  entered  a  sane  head ! ' ' 
Hildegarde  had  no  conception  of  what  such  a  journey 

223 


224  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

was  like.  The  ships  were  the  most  uncomfortable  in  the 
world.  Freight  boats,  with  no  accommodation  for 
women.  The  food  appalling.  The  company— oh,  it 
did  n  't  even  bear  talking  about ! 

But  Cheviot  did  talk  of  it,  to  Bella,  when  he  discov 
ered  her  complicity,  and  so  effectually  he  talked  that  she 
withdrew  her  support. 

Hildegarde  was  speechless  with  indignation.  What 
spell  had  he  cast  that  Bella  could  "go  back"  on  her 
word.  Truly  a  thing  to  depend  upon— Bella's  friend 
ship. 

"Oh,  please  try  to  understand.  I  was  always  fright 
ened  at  the  idea,  even  before  Louis  told  me—" 

"Why  should  you  be  frightened,"  said  Hildegarde 
sternly.  "It  is  n't  as  if  I  were  a  rescue  party  and  my 
little  journey  were  to  the  other  side  of  the  world.  I 
should  n't  sail  from  Norway,  and  I  should  n't  catch  up 
with  anybody  in  Franz  Josef  Land. ' ' 

1 '  Hildegarde !  You  've  never  spoken  to  me  like  that 
before  in  your  life. ' ' 

"No,  I  've  never  admitted  before  that  you  'd  failed 
me." 

Bella,  with  flushed  face,  got  up  to  leave  the  room. 
"You  think  I  'm  backing  out  only  because  of  what  Louis 
says.  But  I  meant  to  tell  you  it  would  have  been  terrible 
to  me  to  be  responsible  for  your  going,  after  what  you 
said  that  night  Louis  came  home. ' ' 

"What  did  I  say?" 

"That  this  summer,  while  you  're  gone — " 

"Well?" 

"There  will  be  news." 

"You  mean  from — " 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  225 

"Yes,"  Bella  steeled  herself.  "As  soon  as  I  M  got 
you  out  of  the  way— 

Hildegarde  winced;  rather  dreadful  that  she  should 
have  said  that  to  Bella— too  like  what  the  average  male 
critic  would  expect.  "Did  I  say  you,  Bella?  I  only 
meant  fate." 

"You  were  sure  he  would  come  this  summer.  Stay 
and  see." 

"It  's  only  if  I  'm  not  here  that  John  Galbraith  will 
come. ' ' 

Hildegarde  had  a  final  interview  with  the  arch  culprit, 
Cheviot. 

"I  had  no  idea  you  could  be  like  this,"  she  said,  to 
ward  the  close. 

' i  Then  it  's  as  well  you  should  know. ' ' 

It  ended  in  a  breach.  He  came  no  more  to  the 
house.  Hildegarde  passed  him  in  the  street  with  lowered 
eyes. 

And  Bella  had  gone  home. 

THE  spring  went  creeping  by. 

Now  June  was  gone.    Even  July.    Still  no  news. 

"You  see,"  said  Hildegarde  dully,  "father  is  n't  com 
ing  back." 

August  was  waning— not  even  a  letter.  And  from 
that  other  more  terrible  North,  no  syllable  of  the  tid 
ings,  that  to  reach  those  two  waiting  in  California,  must 
come  round  by  the  old  world,  and  all  across  the  new. 

"He  is  dead,"  Hildegarde  said  to  herself,  and  it  was 
not  of  Nathaniel  Mar  that  she  was  thinking. 

The  boys  had  generously  sent  their  father  both  money 
and  advice.  He  was  recommended  to  use  the  sight  draft 

15 


226'  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

on  the  Alaska  Commercial  Company,  for  the  purpose  of 
buying  his  home  passage  by  the  very  next  ship. 

At  last,  when  the  season  was  drawing  to  a  close— 
news! 

Not  that  expected— but  something  no  man  had  looked 
for. 

Gold  had  been  discovered  in  the  sands  of  the  Nome 
beach. 

Men  who  had  been  stranded  there— arriving  too  late 
for  a  claim  on  the  creeks— a  broken  and  ragged  horde, 
were  now  persons  of  substance  and  of  cheerful  occupa 
tion,  that  of  "rocking  out"  fifty  to  a  hundred  dollars  a 
day  upon  the  beach  at  Nome.  The  gold  was  not  here 
alone,  but  under  the  moss  and  the  coarse  grass  of  the 
tundra.  It  clung  to  the  roots  when  you  pulled  up  the 
sedgy  growths.  It  was  everywhere.  What  was  the  con 
tracted  little  valley  of  the  Klondike  compared  to  this ! 

'  *  The  greatest  of  all  the  new  world  gold-fields  has  been 
found.  A  region,  vaster  than  half  a  dozen  Eastern 
States,  sown  broadcast  with  gold-dust  and  nuggets. 
Easy  to  reach  and  easy  to  work." 

Here  was  the  poor  man's  country.  If  you  did  n't 
want  to  rock  out  a  fortune  for  yourself,  you  could  earn 
fifteen  dollars  a  day  working  for  others. 

"The  beach  for  miles  is  lined  with  miners'  tents.  An 
vil  City  (hereafter  to  be  called  Nome)  is  booming. 

"Building  lots  that  six  months  ago  were  worth  noth 
ing,  to-day  bring  thousands  of  dollars. 

"Where  a  year  ago  was  only  a  bare,  wind-swept  beach 
on  Bering  Sea— one  of  the  most  desolate  places  to  be 
found  on  earth  and  beside  which  the  Yukon  country  has 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  227 

a  fine  climate— there  is  to-day  a  city  of  several  thousand 
people,  surrounded  by  the  richest  placer-diggings  the 
world  has  seen. '  ' 


The  gold-laden  miners  returning  to  Seattle  by  the  last 
boats  of  the  autumn,  told  the  reporters  with  a  single 
voice,  * '  The  world  has  known  nothing  like  Cape  Nome. ' ' 

Tongues  went  trumpeting  the  mighty  news,  pens  flew 
to  set  it  down,  and  telegraph  operators  flicked  the  tidings 
from  one  end  of  the  earth  to  the  other. 

The  word  ''Nome,"  that  had  meant  nothing  for  so 
long  to  any  man  but  Mar— it  became  a  syllable  of  strang 
est  portent ;  stirring  imaginations  that  had  slept  before, 
heralding  hope  'to  despairing  thousands,  setting  in  mo 
tion  a  vast  machinery  of  ships  and  of  strange  devices, 
and  of  complicated  human  lives. 

New  lines  of  steamships  bought  up  every  craft  that 
could  keep  afloat ;  companies  were  formed  to  exploit  the 
last  new  gold-saving  device ;  men  who  had  fallen  out  of 
the  ranks,  returned  to  the  struggle  saying,  ''After  all, 
there  's  Nome ! ' ' 

"And  this  is  the  moment  Mr.  Mar  will  naturally 
choose  for  turning  his  back  on  the  North."  It  was  so 
that  his  wife  successfully  masked  her  secret  anxiety  for 
his  return.  It  was  as  if  she  resented  so  sorely  her  grow 
ing  uneasiness  about  him— fought  so  valiantly  against 
the  slow-dawning  consciousness  of  the  share  she  had  in 
his  exile,  that  she  must  more  than  ever  veil  secret  self- 
criticism  by  openly,  berating  him.  Above  all  she  must 
disguise  the  impatience  with  which  she  awaited  his  re 
turn  "this  autumn,  at  the  latest."  "Now,"  she  would 
say,  "now  that  even  he  could  n't  fail  to  make  a  good 


228  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

thing  by  staying,  he— oh,  yes,  to  be  sure,  he  'II  come 
hustling  home ! "  If  only  she  had  been  the  man ! 

One  of  the  last  boats  brought  a  letter.  There  was  gold 
in  the  beach  sand,  Mar  wrote,  but  every  inch  was  being 
worked  over  and  over,  and  its  richness  had  been  exag 
gerated.  The  place  was  overrun  with  the  penniless  and 
the  desperate.  The  United  States  military  post  estab 
lished  there  was  powerless  to  maintain  law  and  order. 
Drunkenness,  violence,  crime,  were  the  order  of  the  day. 
The  beach  was  a  strange  and  moving  spectacle. 

''Spectacle!  He  goes' and  looks  on!"  was  Mrs.  Mar's 
way  of  disguising  her  dismay.  He  returned  the  boys' 
money,  ' '  since  it  was  sent  for  a  purpose  so  explicit. ' '  He 
was  "staying  in." 

Other  letters,  brought  by  the  same  steamer,  told  what 
Mr.  Mar  had  omitted  to  mention :  that  typhoid  fever  was 
at  work  as  well  as  those  gold-diggers  on  the  famous 
beach. 

Men  were  dying  like  flies. 

THE  third  winter  came  down,  and  the  impregnable  ice 
walls  closed  round  "the  greatest  gold-camp  on  the 
globe." 

"Typhoid !  Even  if  he  escapes  the  fever,  he  will  stay 
up  there  till  he  dies,  unless-  Hildegarde  was  glad 
she  had  not  yet  bought  anything  for  the  coming  season. 
In  spite  of  her  brothers'  allowance  she  would  become  a 
miser— hoarding  every  coin  that  came  her  way.  She 
would  make  her  old  gowns  do,  even  without  Bella's 
transforming  fingers.  She  thought  twice  even  about 
spending  car  fare.  To  eke  out  her  resources  she  would 
sell  Bella's  beautiful  presents,  and  the  first  boat  that 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  229 

went  north  in  the  spring  should  carry  Hildegarde  to 
her  father— or  to  his  grave. 

It  was  gray  business  waiting  for  this  first  summer  of 
the  century.  What  news  might  one  expect  from  a  man 
lost  four  years  ago  between  Norway  and  Franz  Josef 
Land?  What  from  that  other  in  the  nearer-by  North, 
where  men  dug  gold  and  fought  typhoid  ?  What  fatality 
was  it  that  made  of  all  hope  and  all  desire  a  magnetic 
needle?  Hildegarde  remembered  how  Bella,  to  the  ques 
tion,  "Why  do  you  suppose  there  's  this  mania  among 
us  for  the  North?"  had  answered,  "I  don't  know,  unless 
it  is  that  we  have  the  South  at  home.  Perhaps  Hudson 
Bay  people  and  Finlanders  dream  of  the  tropics.  I 
don't  know.  But  I  've  heard  nothing  so  afflicts  a 
Canadian  as  hearing  his  country  called  'Our  Lady  of 
the  Snows.'  I  think  there  never  was  such  a  beautiful 
name.  But  it  may  be  because  I  live  with  orange  blos 
soms  all  about  me." 

Certainly  it  was  harder  waiting  without  Bella.  To 
gether  each  year  they  had  hoped  for  news.  Now  apart, 
they  feared  it. 

Oddly  enough,  what  helped  Hildegarde  through  the 
heavy  time  was  the  establishment  of  an  understanding, 
half  incredulous,  wholly  una vowed,  between  her  and 
her  mother.  It  appeared  she  had  Mrs.  Mar  on  her  side 
—else  why  did  that  lady  save  up  every  newspaper  refer 
ence  to  the  new  gold-camp  to  read  aloud  as  Hildegarde 
sat  at  her  sewing.  The  most  transcendent  classic  ever 
penned  would  be  put  aside  for— 

"  'Extracts  from  the  note-book  of  Mr.  McPherson,  the 
third  man  to  strike  pay  on  the  beach. 


230  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

'  (They  are  absolutely  correct,  as  I  saw  his  diary  and 
the  mint  returns  for  the  gold,  which  were  at  the  rate 
$19  an  ounce,  yielding  him  nearly  $10,000.) 

'Aug.  llth.— Macomber  and  Levy:  about  a  mile  and  a 
half  from  Anvil  City.  Here  I  got  a  nugget  weighing 
$4.  The  nugget  was  found  in  the  sand,  about  250  feet 
from  low  tide.  Jim  Dunsmuir  and  William  Bates  told 
me  that  they  had  averaged  $40  per  day  rocking.  They 
were  about  eleven  miles  south  of  Anvil.  Price,  on  No.  8 
Anvil,  Sunday,  20th  of  August,  sluiced  out  $6,400  in 
seven  hours,  with  six  men.  Lindblom  took  out  $18,000 
in  eighteen  hours,  with  six  men,  August  14th. 

'Aug.  29th.— Leidley  made  a  wooden  caisson  and  sunk 
it  about  250  ft.  beyond  low  tide,  and  got  from  fifteen  to 
fifty  cents  per  shovel.  I  did  not  see  this  experiment,  but 
I  believe  firmly  that  the  richest  part  of  the  beach  is 
beyond  low  tide. 

1  There  will  be  more  money  come  out  from  Nome  than 
came  from  the  Klondike.'  ' 

"Here  's  a  column  headed— 

"  'A  REGION  RICHER  THAN  PIPE-DREAMS 

"  'Nome  defies  all  theories  and  every  precedent.  Its 
greatest  mines  have  been  found,  and  its  greatest  fortunes 
have  been  made  by  men  who  knew  nothing  of  mining. 
Gold  has  been  discovered  by  lawyers  and  doctors,  dry- 
goods'  clerks,  plow-boys,  barbers,  fiddlers  and  poli 
ticians,  in  a  thousand  places  where  old  miners  would 
have  sworn,  and  did  swear,  it  was  impossible.  Millions 
of  dollars  in  glittering  dust  and  nuggets  have  been 
thawed  out  of  frozen  rubble  and  moss,  and  washed  from 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  231 

ocean  beaches  and  other  unheard-of  depositories  by 
young  divinity  students,  country  printers,  piano  profes 
sors  and  didapper  dandies,  whom  nobody  ever  suspected 
of  knowing  grindstones  from  thousand-dollar  quartz,  or 
iron  pyrites  from  free  gold. '  ' 

Mrs.  Mar  read  on,  intoxicating  herself.  "Here  's  a 
woman  who  was  up  there  in  the  summer  when  the  beach 
gold  was  found.  She  's  brought  home  $15,000,  and  a 
claim  she  refused  to  take  $38,000  for." 

But  if  there  was  anything  about  typhoid  in  the  paper 
Hildegarde  had  to  find  it  out  for  herself.  Little  by  little 
she  knew  that  however  deterred  her  mother  had  been  by 
Cheviot's  onslaught  the  spring  before,  she  was  either 
consciously  or  unconsciously  coming  to  look  favorably 
on  Hildegarde 's  old  plan. 

What  the  inexperience  of  the  girl  could  not  guess  was 
that  Mr.  Mar's  absence  had  taught  his  wife  several 
things.  And  that  lady  had  no  inclination  to  gather  an 
other  year's  harvest  of  the  bitter  fruit.  If  Hildegarde 
could  get  him  to  come  home,  Hildegarde  ought  to  be  sup 
ported  in  spite  of  Cheviot  and  the  boys.  But  real  con 
fidence  between  them  was  so  little  easy,  that  the  girl  said 
nothing  to  her  mother  of  her  plan  to  raise  money  by  sell 
ing  the  beautiful  necklace  and  the  other  things  that  Bella 
had  from  time  to  time  brought  home  to  her  from  abroad. 
Hildegarde  would  go  to  a  man  she  could  trust— "the 
family  jeweler,"  as  they  called  the  individual  whose 
high  office  had  been  to  restore  the  pins  to  brooches  that 
Mrs.  Mar's  energetic  fingers  had  wrenched  off,  and  to 
mend  Mr.  Mar's  grandfather's  watch-chain  when  it 
broke,  as  it  used,  two  or  three  times  every  year. 


232  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

To  the  family  jeweler,  then,  Hildegarde  took  her  box 
of  treasures.  ' '  What  are  they  worth  ? ' ' 

The  little  man  screwed  a  glass  in  his  eye,  and  ex 
amined  rare  stones  and  renaissance  enamel  with  an 
omniscient  air. 

"I  know  you  '11  do  your  best  for  me,"  Hildegarde  said 
anxiously. 

"Of  course— certainly,  Miss  Mar.  Not  very  new  are 
they?" 

"New !    Oh,no— they  're  so  old  they  're  very  valuable  " 
"Yes.    H'm.    Yes." 

"I  need  all  you  can  possibly  get  me  for  them,  Mr. 
Simonson. ' ' 

"I  '11  examine  them  thoroughly,  Miss  Mar,  and  let 
you  know." 

As  she  went  out,  there  was  Bella  coming  down  the 
street.  Acting  on  an  impulse,  Hildegarde  turned  off  the 
main  thoroughfare,  pretending  not  to  see.  But  it  made 
her  heart  sore  to  think,  "Bella  in  Valdivia,  and  not  with 
us !  I  not  even  to  know ! ' ' 

Miss    Wayne    went    into    the    familiar    Simonson 's. 
"Was  that  Miss  Mar  who  was  here  a  moment  ago?" 
"Yes." 

"Oh,  is  it  broken?  That  's  the  necklace  I  got  for  her 
in  Rome." 

"No,  not  broken.  I  suppose  you  don't  remember  what 
you  gave  for  it  ? " 

Miss  Bella  put  on  her  most  beguiling  air,  and  took  the 
old  man  into  her  confidence.  She  would  buy  the  things 
herself  and  pay  him  a  commission,  and  he  was  not  to  say 
but  what  a  San  Francisco  dealer  had  made  the  two-hun 
dred-dollar  offer. 


I  know  you  '11  do  your  best  for  me,'  Hildegarde  said,  anxiously 


COME  AND  FIND  MB  233 

When  she  got  back  to  her  hotel  she  telephoned  to 
Cheviot. 

The  next  day  that  young  gentleman  had  an  interview 
with  Hildegarde's  brothers  down  at  the  ranch.  They 
were  even  boisterously  of  Cheviot's  opinion.  They 
would  simply  refuse  their  consent  to  their  sister 's  under 
taking  such  a  journey.  But  to  Cheviot's  anxious  sense 
they  spoke  too  airily.  Too  certain  they  could  prevent 
the  abomination. 

" Don't  antagonize  her,  you  know,"  warned  Cheviot. 
"Make  her  see  the  reasonableness  of  our— of  your  ob 
jection.  ' '  And  the  boys  agreed. 

Even  before  Cheviot  had  made  money  in  the  Klondike, 
and  come  home  to  be  made  a  partner  in  the  bank;  the 
Mar  boys  had  looked  upon  him,  not  only  as  a  probable, 
but  as  a  highly  desirable  brother-in-law. 

They  soothed  his  natural  indignation  at  Hildegarde's 
foolishness,  and  they  told  him  they  'd  meet  him  at  the 
bank  after  giving  her  a  talking  to. 

They  were  late  for  the  appointment,  and  the  moment 
they  appeared  in  the  room  behind  the  public  offices, 
Cheviot  saw  they  had  not  prospered. 

"Hildegarde  's  the  most  pig-headed  creature  in  the 
universe!"— and  a  few  more  illuminating  details. 

"But  why  did  n't  you  tell  her—" 

"Told  her  everything.    Water  on  a  duck's  back." 

"But  what  did  she  say?" 

'  *  '  Women  have  done  it  before. '  ' 

"It  's  not  true!"  cried  Cheviot,  jumping  up.  "The 
world  has  never  seen  anything  comparable  to  what  this 
year's  rush  to  Nome  will  be.  The  mob  that  will  be 
going—" 


234  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"She  quotes  the  Klondike,  'That  was  worse,'  she  says, 
'yet  there  were  women  among  the  men  who  got  there, lived 
there,  and  came  home.'  Damn  it !  it  's  true,  you  know !" 

"It  is  n't  true.    The  Klondike  was  a  totally  different 
proposition.     The  people  who  got  to  the  Klondike  the 
year  of  the  rush  were  all  picked  men— a  few  women,  yes, 
I  admit,  a  few  women— God  help  them.    But  the  mob— 
a  rascally  crew  enough,  lots  of  them— but  they  were 
men  of  some  means,  men  of  brawn  and  muscle  and 
mighty  purpose  or,  simply,  they  did  n't  survive.    If  they 
were  n't  like  that,  they  turned  back  as  thousands  did, 
from  Juneau,  from  Skagway,  from  Dyea— or  they  fell 
out  a  little  further  on.    Did  n't  I  see  them  on  the  Dalton 
trail  and  the  Chilcoot  Pass,  glad  to  lie  down  and  die? 
I  tell  you,  only  the  hardiest  attempted  it,  and  only  the 
toughest  survived.     That    's  the  sort  of  pioneer  that 
peopled  the  Klondike.    Nome  's  another  story.    Nome  's 
accessible  by  sea.    Any  wastrel  who  can  raise  the  paltry 
price  of  his  passage  can  reach  the  American  gold-fields. 
Any  family  disgrace  can  be  got  rid  of  cheap  by  shipping 
him  to  Nome.    Any  creature  who  's  failed  at  everything 
else  under  the  sun  has  this  last  chance  left.     Be  sure 
he    '11    go    to    Nome— with    Hildegarde!      Good    God! 
Drunkards,  sharpers,   men— and  women,  too    (oh,  yes, 
that  sort!),  and  people  hovering  on  the  border  line  of 
crime  or  well  beyond  it— they   'II  -fill  the  north-bound 
ships.     Hildegarde  alone  with  such  a  crew!"     Cheviot 
jumped  to  his  feet.     "I  'd  infinitely  rather  a  sister  of 
mine  were  struggling  with  a  pack  on  her  back  over  the 
Chilcoot  Pass  along  with  the  Klondike  men  of  '97,  than 
see  her  shut  up  on  board  a  ship  with  the  horde  that  will 
go  to  Nome," 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  235 

He  walked  up  and  down  the  little  inner  office,  his  eyes 
bright  with  anger  and  with  fear.  And  he  added  terrors 
not  to  be  put  before  the  girl  herself,  but  for  the  mother, 
if  Hildegarde  should  be  obdurate.  "Make  her  under 
stand  that  Nome  this  summer  will  be  the  dump-heap  of 
the  world." 

"I  did/'  said  Trenn,  distractedly.  "I  gave  her  my 
opinion  of  what  they  were  like— those  other  women  she 
quoted  who  had  gone.  It  was  n  't  even  news  to  her ! ' ' 

' '  What !     She  accepted  that  ? ' ' 

Trenn  looked  profoundly  humiliated.  Any  nice  girl 
would  have  pretended  she  could  n't  credit  such  a  state 
of  things,  even  if  she  'd  heard  them  hinted.  But  Hilde 
garde  had  said  gravely,  "Yes,  I  know  what  you  mean, 
miserable  women  have  done  it  for  horrible  ends.  It  's 
that  that  makes  me  ashamed  to  hesitate.  Can't  a  girl 
venture  as  much  for  a  good  end  as  those  others  for— 

"Oh,  Hildegarde  's  mad!"  said  Trenn,  with  a  flush 
on  his  handsome  face. 

"'Nevertheless,  she  '11  go,"  said  Harry. 

"But  Mrs.  Mar!    What  's  she  about?" 

Cheviot  went  to  see. 

"You  surely  don't  mean  to  let  her  go?" 

"My  good  man,  I  'd  like  nothing  better  than  to  go 
myself." 

"Then  why  don't  you?"  demanded  Cheviot  rudely. 

Another  woman  might  have  pointed  out  that  she  was 
in  her  sixty-second  year.  No  one  would  have  expected 
such  an  excuse  from  Mrs.  Mar.  There  was  something  in 
her  face  Cheviot  had  never  seen  there  before,  as  with 
obvious  unwillingness  she  brought  out  the  answer,  ' '  Hil- 


236  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

degarde  can  do  this  errand  best.  At  least,  as  far  as  con 
cerns  her  father.  Of  course"— she  recovered  some  of 
her  native  elasticity— "  if  /  went  I  'd  get  a  claim,  too. 
You  'd  see !  I  'd  come  home  with  a  fortune.  I  doubt  if 
Hildegarde  does,  though  she  has  more  in  her  than  I  've 
sometimes  thought.  Hildegarde  won't  come  to  any 
harm. ' ' 

Cheviot,  too  outraged  for  the  moment  to  speak,  got  up 
and  looked  blindly  for  his  hat.  When  he  found  that,  he 
had  also  found  his  tongue.  "The  only  comfort  I  can 
see  in  the  miserable  affair  is  that  she  '11  find  two  hun 
dred  dollars  is  n't  nearly  enough.  There  is  n't  a  place 
on  the  globe  where  living  costs  as  much  as  it  does  at 
Nome." 

"She  's  been  saving  up  her  allowance  for  a  year." 

Cheviot  threw  down  his  hat.  "I  tell  you  it  would  be 
mad  for  an  able-bodied  man  to  go  with  less  than  a  thou 
sand  dollars  margin." 

"Hildegarde  can't  raise  anything  like  that.  But 
she  '11  have  enough  to  get  her  there,  and  something 
over. ' ' 

Cheviot  looked  at  her.  "You  mean  she  's  ready  to  go 
without  even  enough  for  her  return  expenses?" 

1 '  She  says  she  can  leave  the  question  of  returning. ' ' 

"She  knows  we— her  brothers  will  send  out  funds  to 
get  her  back!"  groaned  Cheviot,  beginning  to  walk  up 
and  down.  "And  she,  Hildcgarde,  is  willing  to  em 
barrass  her  father  by  being  a  charge  on  him?" 

"She  won't  stay  long.  And  Nome  lots  are  selling  for 
thousands.  Her  father  has  at  least  the  land  his  tent 
stands  on." 

Cheviot  struck  his  hands  together  in  that  startling  if 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  237 

infrequent  way  of  his.  It  made  even  Mrs.  Mar  rather 
nervous.  "Go  and  argue  with  her  yourself,"  said  the 
lady,  with  raised  voice  and  a  red  spot  glowing  on  either 
cheek.  ' '  I  should  n  't  be  able  to  move  her.  I  never  have 
been  able  to  move  Hildegarde.  That  's  the  worst  of 
these  quiet  people." 

"You  say  that,  and  yet  you  are  n't  really  opposing 
her." 

"Me?  No,"  said  Mrs.  Mar,  fixing  him  with  unflinch 
ing  eyes.  "  I  'm  making  up  the  deficit. ' ' 

Cheviot  had  never  before  longed  to  murder  a  fellow 
creature.  "You  realize,  of  course,"  he  said  quietly, 
"she  is  n't  even  sure  of  finding  her  father  alive."  An 
gry  as  he  was,  when  he  saw  the  look  that  thrust  brought 
to  Mrs.  Mar's  face,  he  was  sorry  he  had  presented  it  so 
mercilessly.  "What  she  '11  probably  find,"  he  hurried 
on  to  say,  "is  that  Mr.  Mar  has  gone  to  the  Casa  da 
Paga.  That  was  his  plan.  Or  the  Fox  River— or  God 
knows  where." 

"If  she  goes  as  far  as  Nome,  she  '11  be  able  to  go  still 
further,"  said  Hildegarde 's  mother,  though  her  voice 
was  n 't  as  steady  as  her  words  implied. 

"I  understand  you,  then,  at  last!"  Cheviot  stopped 
before  her  with  anger-lit  eyes.  "You  are  ready  to  see  a 
young  girl— 

1 1  Not  every  girl. ' ' 

"A  girl  like  Hildegarde." 

"Precisely,  one  like  Hildegarde.    She  can  do  it." 

' '  Poor  Hildegarde ! ' '  burst  from  his  lips,  and  the  im 
plication,  "to  have  a  mother  like  you,"  would  have 
pierced  many  a  maternal  breast.  But  it  glanced  off  Mrs. 
Mar's  armor  and  fell  pointless. 


238  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"Hildegarde  Mar"— with  an  air  of  defending  her 
daughter  from  Cheviot's  low  opinion  of  her— "is  a  per 
son  of  considerable  dignity  of  character. ' ' 

' '  Do  you  think  it  necessary  to  tell  me  that  ? ' ' 

"  Singularly  enough,  yes.  And  to  add  that  I  who 
know  her  best,  have  never  yet  seen  her  show  any  sign  of 
not  being  able  to  take  proper  care  of  herself." 

"Under  ordinary  conditions.  But,  as  I  told  the 
boys-" 

"A  woman  who  can't  take  care  of  herself  under  con 
ditions  out  of  the  ordinary,  can't  take  care  of  herself  at 
all." 

Again  Cheviot  opened  his  lips,  but  Mrs.  Mar,  grasp 
ing  the  arms  of  her  rocking-chair,  indoctrinated  the  pur 
blind  man.  "The  truth  is,  that  a  girl  in  good  health, 
who  has  n't  been  kept  in  cotton,  and  who  has  n't  been 
scared  by  men's  going  on  as  you  're  doing,  is  far  abler 
to  cope  with  life  than— than—  She  pulled  herself  up 
an  instant,  seeming  to  feel  that  after  all  man  is  hardly 
worthy  to  know  the  whole  truth  upon  these  high  themes. 
But  she  thought  extremely  well  of  Cheviot,  or  she  would 
never  have  permitted  him  to  speak  to  her  as  he  had 
done.  And  he  loved  Hildegarde.  "The  truth  is,"  she 
went  on,  ' '  Hildegarde  is  quite  right  about  this.  There  's 
no  reason  why  she  should  n't  go  half  as  strong  as  the 
reason  why  she  should. ' ' 

' '  The  reason !  You  think  it  's  on  account  of  Mr.  Mar. 
It  is  n't.  Bella  will  tell  you  Hildegarde  wants  to  go  on 
this  degrading  journey.  She  said  everybody  had  trav 
eled  about  and  seen  the  world  but  her.  She  had  never 
been  farther  than  Seattle  to  see  Madeleine  Somebody." 

"That  'strue." 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  239 

"You  see!  Hildegarde  is  full  of  curiosity  about— 
things." 

"Why  not?" 

"Oh,  why  indeed!  But  the  fact  opened  my  eyes  to 
how  much— how  little  Mr.  Mar's  welfare  has  to  do  with 
her  crazy  scheme." 

' c  It  has  n  't  opened  your  eyes  very  wide,  Louis. ' '  Mrs. 
Mar  shook  her  head  with  the  air  of  one  looking  back  over 
a  long  road  painfully  traversed.  ' '  Nobody  shrinks  more 
from  a  fuss  and  a  falling-out  than  Hildegarde.  This 
winter,  without  Bella,  and  without  you,  and  without — 
It  has  n't  been  easy  for  Hildegarde.  She  would  have 
given  in  about  Nome  long  ago,  but  for —  Mrs.  Mar 
suddenly  leaned  forward  again,  and  speaking  hurriedly, 
"Somehow  or  other  Hildegarde  knows.  I  believe  she  's 
known  all  along. ' ' 

"Knows  what?" 

"What  her  father  meant  to  do." 

"About  not  coming  home1?" 

"Yes." 

' '  She  knows  that  because  I  told  her. ' ' 

"You  knew  it!" 

"Yes." 

"And  yet"— she  gripped  the  arms  of  the  rocking- 
chair,  and  her  eyes  shone — "you  come  here  to  get  me  to 
prevent  the  only  step  being  taken— 

"  No !  Only  to  protest  against  Hildegarde 's  taking  it. 
Good  heavens!"— he  was  losing  his  self-control— "Hil 
degarde  is— 

"Well  and  strong,  and  no  such  fool  as  you  seem  to 
think." 

He  set  his  square  jaw.    "A  little  young  for  such  a — " 


240  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"  Twenty-six." 

"You  forget  or  don't  know  she  's  also— attract ive." 

"Attractive!"  Mrs.  Mar  repeated  with  a  weight  of 
contemptuous  meaning.  "Since  what  you  imply  is  so 
little  a  credit  to  your  sex,  I  may  be  allowed  to  say  she 
has  shot  at  a  mark  with  her  brothers,  and  if  it  's  neces 
sary,  she  can  carry  a  revolver." 

1 '  Good  God !    And  you  're  her  mother ! ' ' 

Mrs.  Mar  sprang  to  her  feet.  "Yes,  I  'm  her  mother, 
and  that  I  did  n't  myself  suggest  her  going  to  get  her 
father  to  come  home,  is  only  that  I  'm  under  the  spell  of 
the  old  foolishness  about  women.  The  fact  is,  that 
we  're  much  better  able  to  look  out  for  ourselves  than 
men  are— yes,  stare  as  much  as  you  like!  It  's  so. 
You  're  all  babies,  I  tell  you,  and  if  the  women  did  n't 
look  after  you,  you  'd  be  dead  babies ! ' ' 

Cheviot  snatched  up  his  hat  a  second  time  and  walked 
to  the  door.  Mrs.  Mar,  seeing  him  going  off  like  that 
with  never  another  word,  and  with  that  fixed  wretched 
ness  on  his  face,  quickly  crossed  the  room  and  took  hold 
of  his  arm,  as  his  hand  was  on  the  door  knob.  "Hilde- 
garde  is  only  going  to  do  in  a  more  open  way  what 
women  are  always  doing, ' '  she  said. 

Cheviot  turned  angrily,  but  so  astonished  was  he  to 
see  tears  on  her  face  that  he  stood  speechless. 

"Some  woman  said  it  in  a  magazine  the  other  day," 
she  went  on,  "but  every  woman  who  's  good  for  any 
thing  is  doing  it." 

"Going  to  Nome!" 

"Going  out  to  the  battlefield  in  the  evening  to  look 
after  the  wounded." 


CHAPTER  XIV 

ILDEGARDE  wrote  to  Madeleine  Smulsky, 
now  Mrs.  Jacob  L.  Dorn.  Madeleine's  hus 
band,  being  a  Pacific  Coast  importer  in  a 
large  way,  might  be  able  to  advise  in  which 
of  the  fleet  of  steamers  advertised  to  sail 
from  San  Francisco,  and  certain  to  be  the  first  boat  of 
the  year  to  reach  Nome— in  which  should  a  traveler  put 
trust. 

The  answer  brought  Mr.  Dorn's  somewhat  scornful 
profession  that  he  knew  nothing  whatever  about  the 
hastily  formed  San  Francisco  lines,  and  little  good 
about  the  mushroom  companies  of  his  own  city,  but  if 
Hildegarde  thought  of  sailing  from  Seattle  he  would 
look  into  the  matter  for  her.  Seattle  was  the  better  port, 
being  the  natural  gateway  to  the  North  (Hildegarde 
could  hear  Mr.  Dorn  saying  that),  in  witness  whereof 
the  bustling,  booming  city  swarmed  already  with  more 
prospective  passengers  than  there  were  ships  to  float 
them— all  wisely  laying  in  their  provisions,  buying  ma 
chinery  and  outfit  in  that  best  of  all  places— San  Fran 
cisco  ?  oh,  dear,  no !  in  Seattle,  the  City  of  the  Future ! 
Hildegarde  must  at  all  events  come  and  visit  the  Dorns. 
Under  the  guidance  of  Madeleine's  husband,  she  would 
probably  find  out  that,  at  best,  the  journey  to  Nome  was 
impracticable  for  a  lady. 

16  241 


242  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

The  middle  of  April  found  Miss  Mar  a  guest  of  the 
Doras.  Jacob  L.  seemed  presently  to  abandon  all  idea  of 
dissuading  his  wife's  friend  from  carrying  her  wild 
scheme  into  execution,  but  he  pointed  out  the  little  need 
there  was  to  rush  blindly  into  avoidable  difficulties. 
Better  ships  were  in  process  of  being  chartered  for  the 
northern  service,  in  view  of  the  undreamed-of  demand. 
The  season,  moreover,  was  late  this  year.  Those  earlier, 
inferior  vessels  (schooners  and  what  not)  that  were  to 
get  off  before  the  middle  of  May  would  only  spend  the 
time  "knocking  about  the  North  Pacific,  among  the  ice 
bergs." 

So  Hildegarde  waited  while  Mr.  Dorn  looked  thor 
oughly  into  the  question.  Even  looking  into  it  seemed 
perilous.  It  told  on  the  gentleman 's  health,  as  one  might 
suppose.  When  Hildegarde  had  been  only  a  few  days 
under  his  roof,  her  host  took  to  his  bed  with  congestion 
of  the  lungs. 

Madeleine  absorbed  in  nursing  the  husband  had  little 
time  for  the  friend.  Hildegarde  was  suddenly  thrown 
on  her  own  resources.  But  she  felt  it  would  be  impolitic 
to  write  that  fact  to  Valdivia.  From  one  shipping  office 
to  another,  from  Southwick's  Great  Outfitting  Em 
porium  to  the  Baumgarten  Brothers'  Wholesale  Pro 
vision  House,  she  went  in  quest  of  information ;  thread 
ing  her  way  through  the  bustling  streets,  where  among 
the  featureless  thousands,  day  by  day  she  often  saw  the 
figure  of  the  frontiersman  in  broad-brimmed  hat  and 
brown  boots,  laced  to  the  knee;  or  the  weather-beaten 
miner,  in  "waders"  and  brown  duck  or  mackinaw. 
"They  're  coming  to  Nome!"  she  would  say  to  herself, 
looking  on  them  already  as  fellow-travelers.  One  feel- 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  243 

ing  much  with  her  is  perhaps  really  rather  new  in 
woman's  experience,  among  the  many  things  called 
"new"  that  are  yet  so  old.  It  seems  as  if  never  before 
her  generation  could  it  have  been  a  matter  of  course  to  a 
girl  like  Hildegarde  Mar,  that  she  should  feel  instinc 
tively  it  would  be  as  absurd  to  treat  these  bearded  fron 
tiersmen  with  condescension,  as  to  be  terrified  of  them. 
Not  that  she  analyzed  the  situation.  It  was  too  simple 
for  that.  Her  feeling  was  merely  that  these  uncouth 
fellow-creatures  were  possible  friends  of  hers.  As  she 
met  and  passed  them,  or  in  imagination  "placed"  them 
in  her  coming  experience,  her^mental  attitude  was  sin 
gularly  untarnished  by  the  age-old  anxiety  of  the  unpro 
tected  female  casting  about  for  a  champion.  Something 
less  self-centered  than  that,  something  kindlier,  less  the 
child  of  fear.  Cheviot  might  have  qualms,  but  man  was 
not  for  Hildegarde  her  natural  enemy.  A  woman  alone 
was  not  obliged  to  peep  furtively  about  for  shelter,  or 
for  some  coign  of  vantage,  like  one  pursued  in  a  hostile 
land.  Not  his  immemorial  prey,  she;  but  like  him  the 
possible  prey  of  circumstance,  with  ignorance  for  her 
arch-enemy  as  well  as  his.  Those  booted  and  sombreroed 
men— some  of  them  at  least— had  already  met  and  over 
come  the  common  enemy.  They  would  be  masters  of  the 
situation  up  there.  Herself  the  mere  ignorant  human 
being,  eager  to  learn,  innocent  of  class-illusion,  intensely 
alive  to  "differences,"  yet  knowing  which  of  them  were 
only  skin-deep,  or  rather  education-deep;  young,  yes; 
attractive,  too;  a  girl  going  into  a  strange  new  world 
who  yet  goes  fearlessly,  hopefully,  carrying  faith  in 
human  nature  along  for  her  shield  and  her  buckler.  If 
this  is  an  apparition  new  upon  the  earth,  then  perhaps 


244  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

the  modern  world  has  something  to  be  proud  of  beyond 
the  things  it  has  celebrated  more. 

Not  that  she  encountered  no  difficult  moments.  She 
was  stared  at,  and  she  could  see  that  she  was  speculated 
about.  Well,  that  was  no  killing  matter.  Perhaps  it 
was  because  she  was  so  tall.  When  in  the  thronged  and 
noisy  offices  she  was  crowded  and  pushed  by  an  excited 
horde— though  shown  no  special  disrespect  as  a  woman 
—she  was  certainly  not  comfortable,  and  was  even  a 
little  forlorn.  When  a  brow-beating  passenger-agent 
vented  his  ill-temper  upon  her  refusal  to  buy  a  ticket 
forthwith  without  waiting  "to  inquire  further,"  she  felt 
the  man's  rudeness  keenly,  absurdly.  But  it  was  not 
till  some  ' '  masher "  of  a  clerk  spoke  to  her  with  a  vulgar 
familiarity  that  discomfort  went  down  before  humilia 
tion  in  the  thought,  "What  would  Louis  say  if  he 
knew  ? ' '  However,  the  clerk  soon  saw  his  error,  and  the 
tall,  quiet  girl  was  taken  at  a  different  valuation.  Men, 
even  the  most  ignorant  men,  learn  these  lessons  more 
quickly  than  is  supposed.  But,  oh,  it  was  n't  easy  to  do 
the  work  of  preparation  alone!  comparing,  eliminating, 
deciding  all  by  oneself.  For  at  every  step,  upon  every 
question,  one  encountered  conflicting  testimony.  Every 
store-window  that  one  passed  displayed  things  "Indis 
pensable  for  Nome."  Every  ship  that  sailed  was  the 
best,  and  bound  to  be  first  at  the  goal.  Now  and  then  to 
some  one  of  the  besieging  hundreds  at  the  offices,  Hilde- 
garde  would  put  a  question.  The  women  looked  ask 
ance.  The  men  answered  civilly  enough.  But  if  they 
knew  little  more  than  Hildegarde,  they  entertained 
darker  fears.  And  still,  and  always,  testimony  was  in 
conflict.  The  firm  that  impressed  her  most  favorably, 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  245 

whose  office  she  had  just  left  "to  think  it  over"— why 
they,  it  seemed,  were  a  set  of  thieves.  Passage  on  one  of 
their  ships  meant  ten  to  twenty  days '  starvation  on  short 
rations  of  sour  bread  and  salt  horse.  Heavens,  what  an 
escape !  But  that  other  firm  she  was  on  her  way  to  in 
terrogate—they  were  traffickers  in  human  life !  Did  n't 
she  know  they  had  been  buying  disabled  craft  of  every 
description,  even  hauling  up  abandoned  wrecks  out  of 
the  sea,  sweeping  the  entire  Pacific  for  derelict  and 
rotten  craft  that  they  might  paint  and  rename,  and  make 
a  fortune  out  of  crowding  such  crazy  vessels  full  of 
ignorant  human  cattle  for  Cape  Nome  ? 

But  these  people,  proprietors  of  the  New  Line,  in 
whose  offices  they  stood— their  ships  if  starting  later 
were  at  least  seaworthy.  Seaworthy  ?  'Sh !  Their  ships 
did  n't  so  much  as  exist.  These  men  only  waited,  post 
poning  sailing  dates  on  one  pretext  or  another,  till  they 
had  got  your  money  and  filled,  and  over-filled,  the  lists 
of  their  phantom  ships.  When  they  'd  done  that,  you  'd 
see!  They  'd  pocket  their  thousands  and  abscond  into 
Canada. 

While  Hildegarde  waited  hesitating,  even  on  the 
smallest  and  least  faith-inspiring  boats  the  passenger 
lists  rapidly  filled.  And  still  every  train  that  thundered 
into  the  Seattle  station  disgorged  its  hundreds  clamoring 
to  be  taken  to  Nome.  Already,  since  Hildegarde 's  ar 
rival,  a  number  of  schooners  and  several  steamers,  with 
flags  flying  and  bands  playing,  had  gone  forth  to  meet 
the  early  ice  floes.  Would  these  daring  ones  get  any 
further,  after  all,  than  the  Aleutian  Islands  before  June  ? 
"You  '11  see  they  '11  have  to  put  in  at  Dutch  Harbor 
for  a  month ! ' '  Hildegarde  saw  men,  standing  in  dense 


246  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

crowds    on   the   wharves,    shake    their   heads,    as   they 
watched  each  ship  go  forth  on  the  great  adventure. 

"All  my  life,"  thought  the  girl,  "I  shall  remember 
the  port  of  Seattle,  when  the  first  boats  went  to  Nome. ' ' 

There  were  those  who  might  seem  to  have  more  cause 
than  Hildegarde  Mar  to  remember  that  unprecedented 
spectacle.  For  to  the  wonderful  ' '  Water  Front ' '  sooner 
or  later  every  creature  in  Seattle  found  his  way— com 
monly  to  suffer  there  some  strange,  malignant  change. 
Even  the  quiet  ones  began  to  emit  strange  sounds,  and  to 
tear  about  as  if  afflicted  with  rabies;  the  most  self -con 
trolled  went  mad  among  the  rest.  They  fought  their  way 
through  the  barriers,  men  and  women  alike;  they 
screamed  about  their  freight  upon  the  docks ;  hurrahing 
and  gesticulating,  they  saw  maniac  friends  off,  on  ships 
whose  decks  were  black  with  people,  whose  rigging,  even, 
swarmed  with  clotted  humanity,  like  bees  clinging  in 
bunches  to  the  boughs  of  a  tree. 

In  the  "orderly"  streets  of  a  great  city,  a  girl  like 
Hildegarde  would  have  been  remarked,  followed,  prob 
ably  accosted.  She  had  had  experience  of  that  even  in 
Valdivia,  where  nearly  every  creature  knew  who  she 
was.  In  the  vast  and  eager  crowd  on  the  Seattle  water 
front  she  passed  with  little  notice  and  wholly  unmo 
lested.  Every  one  had  business  of  his  own.  If  the  man 
who  pushed  against  you  till  he  nearly  knocked  you  down 
was  not  an  excited  passenger  rushing  for  the  next  ship, 
he  was  a  company  agent  seeing  off  a  hundred  thousand 
dollars'  worth  of  machinery;  or  he  was  the  gentleman  in 
a  smaller  way  of  business,  who  was  beating  up  trade  in 
the  neighborhood  of  the  Last  Chance  Bazaar.  Here  and 
there  on  a  tiny  temporary  platform,  nearly  swamped  by 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  247 

the  crowd,  or  standing  insecurely  on  a  jostled  barrow, 
merchants  whose  ages  ranged  from  eight  to  eighty,  of 
fered  you  something  you  'd  bless  them  for  every  hour  of 
your  life  at  Nome.  Here  an  improved  sort  of  prospect 
ing  pan— you  had  only  to  carry  it  up  to  lat.  62°  to  fill  it 
full  of  gold  all  day  long.  There  was  a  Nome  mosquito- 
mask,  fastened  like  a  gallows '-cap  on  the  face  of  a  stiff, 
pale  figure  of  wax,  lifted  high  in  air,  rigid,  travestying 
death— horribly  arresting.  There  was  every  kind  of 
waterproof— hat,  coat  and  boot;  for,  that  summer  at 
Nome  meant  nothing  but  rain,  was  the  one  point  upon 
which  every  one  agreed.  By  way  of  object  lesson, 
"rockers"  for  separating  Nome  gold  from  Nome  sand 
are  being  jogged  to  and  fro  upon  the  wharves;  vendors 
of  patent  medicine  are  crying  one  another  down;  a  dif 
ferent  concentrated  food  is  proclaimed  at  every  corner, 
a  new  gold  "process"  every  ten  feet  and  bedlam  all 
around  you.  Copper  plates;  pickaxes;  shovels;  and— 
"Here  y'  are!  The  last  thing  out!  Compound-cork 
screw-screw-driver-monkey-wrench,  'n'  can-opener.  All 
y'  grub  goes  to  Nome  in  cans.  Y'  '11  starve  to  death 
right  plumb  in  the  middle  o'  plenty,  'nless  y'  get  this 
yer  noo  compound-corkscrew-screw-driver-monkey— 
The  rest  is  drowned  by  the  dernier  cri  in  "Nome 
sto-o-o-ves !  Burn  -  oil  -  burn  -  wood  -  burn  -  coke  -  burn  - 
anything  -  in  -  hell  -  and  -  never  -  burn  -  the  -  dinner !  Nome 
sto-o-o-ves!"  Other  hawkers  so  hoarse  you  heard  noth 
ing  but  "Nome!  Nome!"  as  if  they  had  it  there— a 
nostrum  you  might  buy  at  home. 

Hildegarde  's  mind  went  back  to  the  old  reconnaissance 
map  in  the  dining-room.  She  so  little  she  must  climb 
upon  a  cnair  to  read  in  her  father's  fine,  clear  writing, 


248  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

the  name  opposite  a  tiny  projection  in  the  coast  line.  It 
had  been  a  place  only  he  seemed  to  know  about.  Now 
on  every  sign,  on  every  lip,  Nome !  Nome !  Nome ! 

Overheard  fragments  among  new-comers  at  the  ship 
ping  offices,  no  more  ' '  Which  boat  ? ' '  but  ' '  Can  you,  even 
by  paying  some  feller  a  bonus,  get  anything  in  the  shape 
of  a  ticket  before  June  ? ' ' 

The  element  of  chance  was  not  to  be  eliminated.  It 
must  be  faced.  On  her  way  to  the  office  of  the  Line  she 
had  first  affected,  she  saw  swinging  on  in  front  of  her, 
hands  in  overcoat  pockets,  shouldering  his  way  through 
the  throng,  one  of  those  same  high-booted,  wide-hatted 
men  of  whom  she  had  said  at  first,  "He  's  going,  too ! ' ' 
But  this  man  had  been  marked  out  by  his  air  of  enjoy 
ing  the  enterprise.  Most  people,  even  away  from  the 
maddening  water  front,  bore  about  with  them  a  harassed, 
or  at  best,  pre-occupied  countenance,  the  majority  sal 
low  and  seamed  and  weary.  This  wide-mouthed  young 
giant  with  the  fresh  complexion— he  was  one  of  whom 
you  felt  not  only  "he  knows,"  but  "he  knows  it  's  all 
right."  Now,  if  he  should  be  on  his  way  to  secure  a 
passage  at  this  same  office,  Hildegarde  would  take  it  as 
a  lucky  omen.  But  he  carried  his  tall  figure  swinging 
by.  His  back  seemed  to  say,  "No,  thank  you.  I  know 
too  much  to  be  taken  in  by  the  Golden  Sands  Company." 
Hildegarde  went  past  the  Golden  Sands  Company  her 
self,  without  quite  intending  to.  The  ruddy-complex- 
ioned  one  was  stopped  by  a  fussy  little,  middle-aged 
man,  who  said,  "Wonder  if  you  can  tell  me  where  the 
Centrifugal  Pump  Company's  offices  are?" 

"What?"  says  the  red-cheeked  giant  as  Hildegarde 
went  by.  "You  mean  Mitchell,  Lewis  and  Starver?" 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  249 

"Y-yes,"  said  the  fussy  man.  "Are  they  all  right, 
do  you  think  ? ' '  and  the  rest  was  lost.  What  a  pity  she 
could  n't  go  up  as  simply  as  that,  and  ask  his  Giantship 
about  the  boats.  But  no.  He  was  a  rather  young  giant, 
and  a  little  too  enterprising-looking.  No,  better  not.  He 
stared  at  people.  That  was  n't  the  sort  of  man  she  'd 
ever  spoken  to. 

She  had  n't  analyzed  it,  but  with  all  her  simplicity 
and  all  her  sense  of  freedom,  she  was  acutely  sensitive 
about  making  any  avoidable  move  that  might  be  mis 
construed.  The  unfortunate  women  of  the  world  had 
spoiled  things.  Not  only  for  themselves— for  others,  too. 
She  crossed  the  street  and  went  back  toward  the  ' '  Golden 
Sands."  Glancing  over  her  shoulder,  she  saw  the  giant 
part  from  his  interlocutor  and  disappear  in  the  office  of 
Hankin  &  Company.  So  that  was  the  best  line! 
Slowly  she  retraced  her  steps,  turning  over  in  her  mind 
all  she  'd  heard  about  Hankin  &  Company.  Perhaps 
even  without  this  last  indication  the  evidence  did  point 
Hankinward.  She  went  in.  Craning  over  heads,  and 
peering  across  shoulders  she  saw  the  huge  young  man 
talking  to  the  agent.  She  edged  her  way  nearer. 

"You  '11  have  plenty  o'  time  to  load  your  stuff.  The 
Congress  '11  be  at  the  docks  Toosday. ' ' 

"Sure?" 

"Dead  certain." 

The  giant  nodded  and  strode  out  on  seven-league 
boots.  A  moment  later  Hildegarde  had  laid  $125  down 
before  the  alcohol-reeking,  red-eyed,  nervous  agent,  who 
seemed  to  feel  called  on  to  explain  that  he  'd  been  up  all 
night  "on  the  water  front,  seeing  off  the  Huron." 
While  he  made  out  the  voucher,  huskily  he  congratulated 


250  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

the  young  lady  that  an  intending  passenger  by  this  best 
of  all  ships  had  had  a  fit  on  the  water  front  the  night 
before,  and  was  probably  dying  now  ' '  over  at  the  Rainier 
Grand."  His  wife  had  been  in  half  an  hour  ago  about 
reselling  the  ticket.  And  that  was  it.  Number  twenty- 
one.  He  handed  Hildegarde  the  slip  of  gray-blue  paper 
which  transferred  to  her  the  dying  man 's  right  to  a  first- 
class  berth  on  Hankin  &  Company's  Steamer  Congress, 
sailing  from  Seattle  to  Cape  Nome  on  the  19th  of  May. 

Now  for  a  decision  amongst  the  contending  outfitters 
and  provision  dealers. 

She  had  studied  well  the  prospectuses,  the  "folders" 
and  the  hand-books.  She  had  made  notes  and  lists.  She 
knew  she  must  provide  herself  with : 

"A  tent  and  two  pair  dark  Hue  Hudson  Bay  blankets. 

"Water  boots. 

"Several  yards  stout  netting. 

"Leather  gaiters. 

"Coivboy's  hat. 

"Canvas  bag,  with  shoulder  strap. 

"Oil  stove,  and  oil." 

To  this,  upon  her  mother's  initiative,  she  proposed  to 
add  a  pistol ;  on  her  own,  four  pounds  of  chocolate  and  a 
handsome  supply  of  peppermints. 

She  had  culled  from  newspapers,  books,  and  advertise 
ments  at  least  six  different  lists  of  the  kind  and  quantity 
of  food  one  would  need.  Already  she  had  ordered  sev 
eral  cases  of  mineral  water,  but  she  was  still  pondering 
"evaporated  eggs,"  "desiccated  potatoes,"  "malted 
milk  tablets,"  and  "bouillon  capsules,"  as  she  stood  in 
one  of  the  great  provision  houses  that  very  day  she  had 
got  her  ticket. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  251 

The  place  was  crowded.  Here,  as  elsewhere,  a  few 
women  among  the  many  men ;  both  sexes  equally  bent  on 
business.  While  she  waited  in  the  throng,  a  clerk  who, 
with  difficulty,  had  been  making  his  way  to  her,  inter 
rupted  a  query  modestly  preferred  by  a  little  weather- 
beaten  woman  in  black.  As  if  he  had  not  heard  the  one 
who  spoke,  of  the  one  who  had  said  nothing  he  asked, 
* '  Is  anybody  looking  after  you  ? ' ' 

"As  soon  as  the  lady  has  finished—  '  began  Hilde- 
garde.  The  rusty  one  glanced  at  her  fellow-woman  in 
some  surprise,  and  said  again  to  the  clerk,  "I  just 
stepped  in  to  ask  you  to  be  sure  to  have  a  keg  .of  witch- 
hazel  ready  to  go  out  with  our  stuff.  You  ran  out  of  it 
last  year." 

"Oh,  are  you  Mrs.  Blumpitty?" 

"Yes." 

"Have  you  given  your  order?"  The  clerk's  manner 
had  changed,  he  had  plenty  of  time  now. 

"Mr.  Blumpitty  will  step  in  to-morrow  about  it.  He 
is  quite  a  little  rushed  to-day,  hunting  around  for  a  place 
to  sleep  in." 

"There  's  a  good  many  doing  that,"  said  the  clerk. 
"There  has  n't  been  a  room  vacant  at  a  hotel  for  a 
week. ' ' 

' '  I  guess  that  's  right.  And  we  got  a  party  of  twenty- 
eight  this  time.  I  only  wanted  to  jog  you  about  that 
witch-hazel."  She  was  moving  off. 

Hildegarde  stood  in  the  way.  "Are  you  going  to 
Nome?"  asked  the  girl. 

"Yes." 

"Do  you  mind  telling  me  what  you  are  going  to  do 
with  witch-hazel,  up  there  ? ' ' 


252  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"A  person  wants  witch-hazel  everywhere/' 

"Why  do  they!" 

"Best  doctor  in  the  world." 

"What  's  it  good  for?"  Typhoid  was  in  the  ignorant 
mind. 

"Good  for  anything.    Burns,  cuts,  bruises,  anything." 

"Oh!"  Down  at  the  foot  of  the  list,  after  pepper 
mints,  went  witch-hazel.  Again  the  little  woman  showed 
signs  of  moving  on.  But  she  looked  back  at  Hildegarde 
over  her  shoulder  and,  as  if  to  imply :  this  much  I  leave 
you,  even  if  you  are  too  good-looking  to  inspire  confi 
dence.  "Witch-hazel  ain't  like  those  noo  things  they 
advertise.  It  's  been  tested." 

"Oh,  has  it?" 

She  did  n't  know  much,  this  young  lady.  "Guess  it 
lias,"  said  the  little  woman.  "In  every  country  store 
in  my  part  of  the  world,  you  '11  find  a  keg  of  witch- 
hazel  ! ' '  and  with  that  she  would  have  been  gone  but  that 
the  crowd  pressed  her  back. 

"What  is  your  part?"  asked  Hildegarde. 

The  woman  looked  round  at  her  suspiciously. 
"Maine." 

"You  come  all  the  way  from  Maine  to  go  to  Nome?" 

She  nodded.  "Guess  everybody  here  but  you  is  goin' 
straight  to  Nome."  Her  eye  fell  on  Hildegarde 's  pen 
cil,  suspended  above  the  list  held  too  high  for  the  little 
woman  to  know  its  exact  nature.  "Noospaper  woman?" 
she  said,  putting  the  most  charitable  construction  on  the 
presence  here  among  the  hard-featured  horde  of  a  person 
like  this. 

Hildegarde  had  been  asked  that  question  before. 
"No,"  she  said,  and  saw  her  credit  fall  in  the  rusty  one's 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  253 

eyes.  "But  I  'm  going  to  Nome,  too,"  the  girl  hastened 
to  add,  wishing  to  recover  ground.  But  it  was  plain  she 
had  only  further  damaged  herself. 

"Oh,"  said  the  witch-hazel  advocate,  moving  off  with 
some  precipitation  through  a  momentary  opening. 

Hildegarde  found  the  clerk  who  had  seemed  to  know 
Mrs.  Blumpitty.  "Have  you  heard  what  boat  she  's 
going  by?" 

"No, "  said  the  clerk,  "but  she  '11  go  by  the  best,  I  bet. ' ' 

"Why  do  you  say  that?" 

"Well,  she  's  one  o'  the  few  that  knows  the  ropes. 
She  was  there  last  year."  And  he  was  called  away. 

She  might  know  Hildegarde 's  father! 

Early  the  next  day  the  girl  reappeared  at  Baumgar- 
ten's.  No,  she  was  n't  going  to  give  her  order  just  yet. 
She  was  waiting  to  see  Mrs.  Blumpitty.  So  the  Baum- 
garten  Brother  turned  from  her  to  advise  a  customer 
against  taking  saccharine  instead  of  sugar.  "You  '11 
come  to  hate  the  taste  even  in  tea  and  coffee,  and,  as  for 
eating  it  sprinkled  on  anything,  you  '11  find  you  simply 
can't."  A  group  of  people  were  hotly  discussing  vege 
tables,  and  whether  to  take  them  desiccated  or  "jest  as 
they  are,"  The  new  ones  "not  in  yet,"  the  Baumgarten 
Brother  admitted;  "and  the  old  ones  sure  to  sprout," 
said  some  one  else.  A  Klondiker  gave  his  views :  ' '  Take 
'em  dried.  Lot  less  freight  on  the  boat.  Lot  easier 
packed  about  afterwards."  A  babel  of  voices  rose: 
"Tasteless,"  "No  good  left  in  'em,"  "No  feeding 
power."  Another  voice:  "Who  cares  about  how  easy  it 
is  to  take  somethin'  that  's  no  good?"  "People  go  on 
about  evaporated  food  jest  as  if  it  was  the  Klondike  and 
the  Chilcoot  Pass  all  over  ag'in.  'T  ain't.  Nome  's  a 


254  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

different  proposition."  The  Baumgarten  Brother  was 
instructed  to  put  down  half  the  order  in  dried  and  half 
in  fresh.  Then  a  detachment  went  away  to  see  opened 
and  to  taste  a  new  brand  of  canned  cooked  sausages. 
People  stood  about  with  pickles  and  shavings  of 
"chipped  beef"  and  cheese  samples  in  their  hands,  nib 
bling  and  looking  thoughtful.  Others  ate  butter  off  the 
end  of  a  penknife,  and  said,  "It  ain't  no  better  'n  mar 
garine,  an'  costs  more."  When  for  two  hours  and  ten 
minutes  Hildegarde  had  stood  there  against  the  low 
columnar  wall  of  piled  tomato  cans  (a  kind  of  basaltic 
formation,  showing  singularly  regular  "fracture"  and 
wide  range  of  color-stain),  the  clerk  of  yesterday  gave 
her  a  stool  to  perch  on  in  the  corner.  Many  of  the 
crowding  faces  were  grown  already  familiar.  There  was 
the  fresh-complexioned  giant.  He  came  in  with  a  pleas 
ant  towering  briskness,  and  stood  talking  to  one  of  the 
Baumgartens.  As  Hildegarde  watched  him,  she  told 
herself  she  was  glad  that  man  was  going  on  "her"  ship. 
Then  reflecting,  "Why,  I  'm  staring  at  him  now!"  she 
turned  away  her  eyes,  and  there  suddenly  was  Mrs. 
Blumpitty,  with  a  thick-set,  dun-colored  husband— his 
face  a  grayish-yellow,  his  hair  a  yellow-gray,  his  eyes 
yellow,  with  pale  gray  irises. 

Hildegarde  descended  from  the  high  stool  and  made 
her  way  to  the  couple.  "Is  it  true  you  were  at  Nome 
last  summer  ? ' ' 

"Yes."  Mrs.  Blumpitty  drew  closer  to  the  dun-col 
ored  husband,  as  if  more  than  ever  mistrustful  of  the  tall 
young  lady. 

But  Hildegarde  took  no  notice  of  that.  "I  wonder," 
she  said,  '  *  if  you  met  a  Mr.  Mar  up  there  ? ' ' 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  255 

The  woman  looked  at  her  husband,  and  he  looked 
straight  along  his  nose.  It  was  a  long  nose,  and  it 
seemed  to  take  him  a  great  while  to  get  to  the  end  of  it. 

Hildegarde  could  n't  wait.  "Yes,  Mr.  Mar,"  she  said 
eagerly,  "Mr.  Nathaniel  Mar." 

"I  don't  think—  "  began  the  woman. 

"Oh,  please  try  to  remember.  He  is  very  thin  and 
tall,  with  bushy  hair.  I  feel  sure  you  'd  remember  him 
if  you  thought  a  moment.  He  is  the  kind  people  re 
member.  ' ' 

Something  in  the  trembling  earnestness  of  a  person 
who  looked  as  self-possessed  as  Hildegarde  had  its  effect. 

"You  can  know  people  up  there  pretty  well  and  never 
hear  their  names.  Nome  is  like  that.  I  may  have  seen 
him." 

Oh,  how  close  it  brought  him  to  hear  the  dun-col 
ored  husband  saying,  ' '  I  may  have  seen  him ! ' ' 

'  *  A  young  man  ? ' '  asked  the  wife. 

"No,"  said  Hildegarde,  and  she  was  shaking  with  ex 
citement.  "  He  is  gray,  and  he— he  is  very  lame. ' '  This 
bald  picture  of  her  own  drawing  suddenly  overcame  her. 
"Try,"— she  found  herself  catching  at  the  rusty  arm— - 
"try  to  remember.  He  is  my  father." 

"Oh,  your  father,"  said  the  woman  in  a  different 
tone,  and  the  vague  man  turned  his  pale  eyes  on  Hilde 
garde  as  though  only  now  fully  aware  of  her. 

"Lame!  There  was  a  lame  man.  No,  I  never  spoke 
to  him." 

"We  were  n't  much  in  Nome,"  the  woman  explained. 
1  i  Our  claims  are  out  on  Glaysher  River,  and  we  were  at 
our  camp  there  most  of  the  time. ' ' 

Hildegarde    leaned    against    the    brilliant    dado    of 


256  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

Delicious  Tomato  Soup,  and  she  looked  so  disheartened 
the  man  said,  "Was  you  thinkin'  o'  goin'  out?" 
"Yes,  I  'm  going  to  him." 
"Big  party?" 
"No,  no  party  at  all." 
"You  're  not  goin'  alone?" 

"Yes,  I  'm  the  only  one  of  my  family  who  has  time." 
The  pale  eye  fell  on  Hildegarde's  list,  which  she  still 
had  in  her  hand.     "If  your  father  's  there  you  won't 
have  to  take  supplies." 

"I  must  go  prepared  for— anything."  And  she 
turned  her  face  away. 

After  a  pause,  "You  got  anybody  to  advise  you?" 
said  the  man. 

"No." 

The  rusty  woman  looked  at  the  vague  man,  and  the 
vague  man  looked  at  Van  Camp's  Soup. 

"Where  are  you  at?."  he  said  presently. 

Hildegarde  stared. 

He  pushed  back  his  black  slouch  hat  and  sadly  mopped 
his  yellow-gray  brow.  It  was  warm  to-day.  The  crowd 
at  Baumgarten's  made  it  seem  warmer  still.  "Which 
hotel?"  asked  Mr.  Blumpitty. 

"I  'm  not  at  any  hotel.    I  am  at  Mr.  Jacob  Dora's." 

" Jacob  L.  Dora's?" 

' '  Oh,  do  you  know  him  ? ' ' 

' '  No,  I  don 't  know  him,  but  I  know  his  firm. ' '  It  was 
plain  the  name  had  impressed  both  Blumpittys. 

"What  boat  you  goin'  in?"  asked  the  yellow-gray 
man. 

"The  Congress." 

"Oh!" 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  257 

''What  's  the  matter  with  the  Congress?" 

Blumpitty  shook  his  head,  murmured,  ''—pretty  hot," 
and  slowly  divested  himself  of  his  overcoat.  That  done 
he  stood  revealed  in  black  from  head  to  heel.  Something 
inexpressibly  funereal  about  him  now,  that  the  dun-col 
ored  coat  had  masked.  "Pity  you  did  n't  know  about  the 
Los  Angeles,"  he  said  dolefully. 

"What  is  there  to  know  about  her?" 

"She  's  goin'  to  be  fitted  up  in  style." 

"Oh,  I  shan't  mind  style." 

"We  're  goin'  on  the  Los  Angeles,"  said  the  little 
wife. 

"I  do  mind  that— not  going  with  you."  Hilde- 
garde  looked  into  the  woman's  weather-beaten  face,  and 
felt  regret  deepen. 

From  columns  of  Van  Camp  Mr.  Blumpitty  raised 
his  weary  eyes  and  they  fell  on  an  acquaintance  in  the 
crowd.  You  saw  that  even  the  teeth  of  the  dun-colored 
husband  were  yellow-gray.  But  the  effect  of  his  watery 
smile  was  altogether  gray,  and  without  suspicion  of  any 
hue  less  somber.  It  made  you  think  of  a  dripping  day 
in  November,  with  winter  all  before  you.  But  lo !  it  was 
the  cheerful  giant  Blumpitty  had  recognized.  How  long 
had  he  been  there  at  Hildegarde's  elbow. 

"What  's  that  I  heard  you  sayin'  against  the  Con 
gress?"  he  demanded  of  Blumpitty.  (t Congress  is  the 
best  boat  goin '. ' ' 

"We  could  n't  get  passage  for  all  of  us  on  the  Con 
gress,"  said  Blumpitty  meekly. 

"And  we  did  n't  want  to  be  divided,"  contributed 
Mrs.  Blumpitty. 

"We  're  sure  the  Los  Angeles  is  all  right." 

17 


258  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

' '  What  makes  you  sure  ? ' ' 

"Becuz  she  's  just  fresh  from  the  Gover'mint  ser 
vice.  " 

The  giant  laughed,  and  took  out  a  big  silver  watch. 
Hildegarde  saw  with  a  start  of  surprise  that  it  was  past 
luncheon  time. 

"They  do  keep  you  hangin'  around  here."  Blum- 
pitty  looked  wearily  at  the  crowd.  ' '  Guess  I  '11  go  and 
make  an  appointment  with  Baumgarten  for  right  away 
after  breakfast  to-morrer."  He  moved  off  with  the 
giant  at  his  side  and  the  small  wife  at  his  heels. 

Hildegarde  hurried  back  to  Madeleine 's,  where  behold 
Mrs.  Mar  and  Harry ! 

' '  The  boys  began  to  fuss  when  they  read  in  the  papers 
about  Mr.  Dorn  being  ill." 

"Oh,  it  's  all  right— about  me,  I  mean,"  said  Hilde 
garde. 

"I  told  you  it  would  be,"  Mrs.  Mar  said  to  Harry. 
"Now,  here  we  are  in  a  town  where  every  hotel  is  full  to 
overflowing,  and  Jacob  Dorn  dying— to  judge  by  the  way 
Madeleine  behaves.  But  she  always  was  a  little  theat 
rical— that  girl." 

"No,  her  husband  is  very  ill.  I  feel  I  ought  n't  to  be 
here  myself,  really. ' '  Obvious  enough  Hildegarde 's  dis 
may  at  the  apparition  of  her  family.  Ignorant  as  she 
was,  already  she  had  learned  how  little  help  the  average 
person  could  be  about  this  undertaking.  The  Blum- 
pittys  were  different.  She  told  about  them. 

Mrs.  Mar  no  sooner  heard  of  their  existence  than  she 
said:  "Now,  if  you  could  travel  with  a  respectable 
couple—"  In  vain  Hildegarde  pointed  out  she  was 
going  on  another  ship.  Anyhow,  those  people  could  tell 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  259 

Hildegarde  things— they  could  advise.  Anybody  but 
Hildegarde  would  have  had  them  here  and  pumped  them 
well.  The  girl,  in  a  subdued  voice,  reminded  her  mother 
that  it  was  a  house  whose  owner  lay  dangerously  ill. 

"The  very  reason  !  Mr.  Dorn  is  n't  advising  you,  as  he 
promised.  You  must  find  some  one  who  will.  Oh,  you 
are  slow-witted!  Where  are  those  people  staying  with 
their  foolish  name?  You  don't  even  know  their  ad 
dress?  Well,  upon  my  soul,  it  's  a  good  thing  we  did 
come,  after  all !  How  you  '11  ever  be  able  to  get  on  by 
yourself,  /  don't  know."  In  a  trice  Mrs.  Mar  had 
despatched  Harry  to  scour  Seattle,  to  ransack  every  hotel 
register  in  the  place,  "And  don't  come  back  here  with 
out  those  Blumpittys. ' ' 

When,  at  four  o'clock,  there  was  no  news  either  of 
Harry  or  them,  Hildegarde  and  her  mother  set  out  to 
gether—having  told  the  Japanese  servant  to  keep  any 
body  who  called,  as  they  'd  be  gone  only  half  an  hour. 
If  the  Blumpittys,  Mrs.  Mar  said,  were  not  among  the 
crowds  in  the  principal  street,  they  'd  very  probably  be 
on  that  water  front  Hildegarde  had  written  about. 

But  no,  not  a  Blumpitty  to  be  seen.  On  their  way 
home— the  giant.  "He  might  know— he  's  a  friend  of 
theirs,"  Hildegarde  said. 

Without  an  instant's  hesitation  Mrs.  Mar  accosted 
him. 


CHAPTER  XV 

|Y  daughter  thinks  you  know  a  man  and  his 
wife  of  the  name  of  Blumpitty. ' ' 

''Yes,  ma'am/'  said  the  giant,  pulling  off 
his  broad  hat. 

"Do   you   know   where   they   are   to   be 
found?" 

"I  just  now  left  Blumpitty  up  in  the  Stevens  House 
bar." 

' '  In  the  bar !    The  man  drinks  ? ' ' 

"Oh,  no,  not  to  say  drinks/'  said  the  cheerful  one, 
smiling  broadly. 

"What  's  he  doing  in  the  bar  then?" 

"Just  talkin'  to  the  boys." 

"Then  will  you  go  right  away  and  ask  him—" 

' '  There  's  Harry ! ' '     Hildegarde  was  making  signals. 

"Well,  you  're  not  much  good  at  finding  people,"  his 
mother  greeted  him.  "But  we  've  got  Blumpitty." 

"Oh,  how  d'  you  do,"  said  Harry,  prepared  to  ac 
cept  the  giant  in  this  role.  Hildegarde  explained,  and 
the  final  move  in  the  mission  was  committed  to  her 
brother.  The  ladies  were  to  go  home  and  trust  Harry  to 
"bring  Blumpitty  along."  They  were  reassured  when 
they  saw  the  giant  disposed  to  accompany  the  expedi 
tion. 

Within  an  hour,  there  was  Blumpitty  haled  before 
Mrs.  Mar,  like  a  criminal  before  his  judge. 

"Well!"  Mrs.  Mar  glanced  from  her  son  to  the  clock. 

260 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  261 

"And  you  would  n't  have  found  him  even  at  this  hour 
but  for  Hildegarde  and  me."  Harry's  answer  to  this 
(and  to  Hildegarde 's,  " Remember,  we  must  speak  low, 
Mr.  Dorn's  room  is  just  above")  was  to  whisper,  as  if 
divulging  some  tremendous  secret,  "Mr.  Blumpitty." 
Then,  still  more  significantly,  "My  mother."  My 
mother  fastened  her  bright  eyes  upon  the  stranger  who 
had  obliged  her  by  responding  to  her  call.  Plainly  she 
was  not  prepossessed.  The  giant  had  either  been  wrong, 
and  Blumpitty  did  drink  (in  which  case  Mrs.  Mar  was 
wasting  her  time),  or  else  the  man  naturally  looked 
"logy"— a  fatal  way  of  looking. 

"Please  sit  down,  Mr.  Blumpitty,"  said  Hildegarde, 
speaking  very  low.  Mr.  Blumpitty,  more  than  ever  with 
the  air  of  a  mute  at  a  funeral,  deposited  himself  on  the 
extreme  edge  of  a  chair. 

1 '  You  see, ' '  said  Harry,  by  way  of  breaking  the  chill  of 
his  mother's  reception,  "you  see,  Mr.  Blumpitty  was  n't 
on  any  hotel  register. ' ' 

1  i  Why  were  n  't  you  ? ' '  demanded  Mrs.  Mar,  as  though 
this  were  a  damning  charge. 

"No  room  anywhere,"  said  Blumpitty  sadly. 

"Oh,  I  hope  you  found  a  place  to  sleep  in—"  began 
Hildegarde. 

"Wa-al,  yes,  after  huntin'  around  two  whole  days." 

'  *  Two  days ! ' '  says  Mrs.  Mar,  ready  to  nail  him  for  a 
liar  at  the  start,  and  so  save  time.  ' '  There  's  a  night  in 
the  middle  of  two  days." 

"Ya-as.    We  wished  they  wus  n't." 

' '  Where  did  you  sleep  ? ' ' 

"Didn't  sleep  much." 

"Where  did  you  stay?" 


262  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"In  the  station." 

"Station!"     Visions  of  his  being  "run  in"  assailed 
Mrs.  Mar.    ' '  What  station  ? ' ' 

"The  G.  N.  W,"  he  said  indistinctly. 

"The  Great  North  Western  Railroad  Station,"  Harry 
translated,  with  a  reassuring  look  at  the  man. 

"You  slept  in  the  waiting-room?" 

' '  Some  of  us  slept. ' ' 

Oh,  dear,  I  hope  you  've  got  nice  quarters  at  last  ? ' ' 
said  Hildegarde. 

"Wa-al,  we  got  three  rooms.  But,"  gloomier  than 
ever,  "we  got  to  pay  for  'em." 

"What  do  you  want  of  three?"  demanded  Mrs.  Mar. 

''Three  ain't  too  many  fur  twenty-eight  people." 

: '  Twenty-eight !    What  are  you  doing  with  so  many  ? ' ' 

"Takin'  'em  to  Nome."  Had  the  destination  been  the 
nether  regions,  he  could  n't  have  said  it  more  as  one  who 
had  left  hope  behind. 

"Bless  my  soul!"  said  Mrs.  Mar,  with  a  vision  of  the 
crowded  train  she  'd  come  by,  and  the  yet  more  crowded 
streets  she  'd  hunted  through  for  this  same  Blumpitty. 
' '  What  are  they  all  going  to  do  there  ? ' ' 

Blumpitty  smiled  a  faint  world-weary  smile.  "They 
kind  o'  think  they  'd  jest  natchrully  like  to  get  a  share 
o'  this  gold  that  's  layin'  around  up  there." 

"Oh,  you  're  a  prospecting  party." 

' '  I  guess  we  '11  do  some  lookin '  around. ' ' 

: '  Twenty-eight  of  you  ! ' '  exclaimed  Hildegarde  under 
her  breath.  ' '  In  three  rooms ! ' ' 

The  man  nodded  slowly,  and  his  yellow-gray  eyes 
seemed  to  have  a  vision  of  them.  "Layin'  in  rows,"  he 
said  sadly. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  263 

"How  dreadful!"  breathed  Hildegarde.  In  truth  it 
had  a  morgue-like  sound. 

"No— o,"  he  drawled.  "No— o.  Me  and  Mrs.  Blum- 
pitty,  we  do  kind  o'  miss  it,  not  havin'  any  winder.  It  's 
only  a  closet  though, ' '  he  said,  as  if  not  wishing  to  hurt 
the  feelings  of  anything  so  small  and  unpretentious. 
"And  the  rest  of  our  people  are  all  right.  Some  parties 
have  had  to  mix  up,  but  I  been  able  to  get  a  room  for 
the  men,  and"— he  spoke  with  a  weary  pride— "and 
one  for  the  ladies. ' ' 

"Ladies  in  your  party!"  exclaimed  Harry. 

"Ya-as.    Five,  not  countin'  Mrs.  Blumpitty." 

"What  kind?"  demanded  Mrs.  Mar,  at  the  same  mo 
ment  as  Harry  asked,  "What  are  they  going  to  do  up 
there?" 

"Oh,  they  're  all  right,"  said  Blumpitty,  thinking  he 
answered  both.  "Miss  Leroy  Schermerhorn  's  goin'  to 
keep  the  books,  and  be  secretary  and  business  woman  to 
the  Company." 

"What  company?"  says  Mrs.  Mar. 

"Blumpitty  &  Co.,"  says  Mr.  Blumpitty. 

' l  Bless  my  soul ! ' '  says  Mrs.  Mar. 

"Remember  Mr.  Dorn,"  whispered  Hildegarde. 

"Do  I  understand  your  wife  is  going  along—  '  Mrs. 
Mar  began  on  a  lower  note. 

"Yes,  oh,  yes.  I  could  n't  do  it  without  Mrs.  Blum 
pitty." 

"Where  does  she  come  in?" 

"Everywhere.  Little  bit  o'  woman,  so  high.  You  Ve 
seen  her."  He  turned  to  Hildegarde.  She  nodded, 
smiling.  "Don't  weigh  more  'n  ninety-six  pounds. 
Worth  twenty  or 'nary  size  people," 


264  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"What  does  she  do  up  there?" 

"Everything.  Keeps  it  all  together."  He  looked 
round  with  a  melancholy  wistfulness,  as  if  he  felt  keenly 
the  need  of  Mrs.  Blumpitty  to  keep  the  present  situation 
together. 

"And  the  other  women?"  said  Mrs.  Mar. 
"Well,  Mrs.  Tillinghast  is  the  wife  of  the  baker." 
"What  baker?" 
"The  Company's." 
"Blumpitty  &  Co.'s?" 

"Yes,  ma'am.  Then  there  's  Miss  Cremer.  She  's  a 
tailor— goes  along  to  keep  us  mended  up  till  our  clo'es 
get  wore  out.  Then  she  '11  make  us  noo  things.  Mrs. 
Blumpitty  had  to  do  it  all  last  year.  Pretty  heavy  fur 
a  little  woman  no  bigger  'n— " 

"The  baker's  wife  and  the  tailoress,  that  makes  two 
besides  Mrs.  Blumpitty." 

"Yes,  ma'am.  An'  there  's  Miss  Estelle  Maris.  Very 
nice  young  lady.  She  says  she  can  cook."  He  sighed, 
and  then  recovered  himself.  "Even  if  she  can't,  Mrs. 
Blumpitty  can.  Yes"— he  allowed  a  pale  eye  to  wander 
toward  Miss  Mar— "we  got  very  nice  ladies  along,  and 
I  mean  'em  all  to  have  claims. ' ' 

Mrs.  Mar  glinted  at  him,  as  much  as  to  say,  "Oh. 
that  's  the  bait— poor  wretches!" 

' '  It  '11  be  very  nice  for  them, ' '  said  Hildegarde  a  little 
hurriedly. 

"How  do  you  expect  them  to  get  claims?"  asked  Mrs. 
Mar  with  severity. 

"The  Company  's  got  some  valyerble  property  up  on 
Glaysher  Crick." 

"What  company  has?" 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  265 

"Blumpitty&Co." 

"And  are  they  giving  claims  away?" 

He  looked  at  Mrs.  Mar,  quite  unruffled  by  her  tone. 
"The  Company  's  got  more  'n  it  can  work.  And  the 
Company  knows  where  there  's  good  property  nobody  's 
taken  up  yet. ' ' 

"Who  's  in  the  Company?" 

"Me  and  Mrs.  Blumpitty,  and  her  folks,  and  my  folks, 
and  most  of  our  party. ' ' 

"Oh,  just  a  family  affair,"  said  Mrs.  Mar,  with  a 
slighting  intonation. 

"Very  few  besides  jest  ourselves.  We  did  n't  want  a 
lot  of  outsiders. ' ' 

From  Harry's  covert  smile  you  gathered  this  was  a 
new  view  of  the  way  to  float  a  mining  company.  ' '  Why 
don't  you?" 

"We  seen  what  happens  too  often,"  said  Blumpitty 
warily. 

"What  does  happen?"  asked  Mrs.  Mar. 

"The  people  that  's  the  first  to  locate  ain't  often  the 
ones  that  gets  the  benefit. ' ' 

"Why  don't  they?" 

"They  get  froze  out.  I  mean  to  hold  on  to  the  bulk 
o'  the  stock  myself  jest  as  long  's  ever  I  can.  Keep 
things  in  my  own  hands. ' '  He  looked  anxious. 

"Not  let  other  people  take  up  the  stock,  you  mean?" 
inquired  Harry,  smiling  openly  now. 

"It  's  the  only  way,"  said  Mr.  Blumpitty,  and  then, 
as  though  to  change  a  dangerous  topic,  "We  got  a  nice 
party."  He  looked  toward  Hildegarde.  "Pretty  near 
all  the  perfessions.  We  got  a  smart  young  lawyer  and 
two  practical  miners.  We  got  a  nengineer  an'  a  noos- 


266  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

paper  man.  An'  we  got  a  nex-motor  man— used  to  drive 
a  'Frisco  street  car,  and  a  very  bright  feller.  Ya-as,  we 
got  a  carpenter,  too,  an'  three  doctors  an'  a  boat-builder 
an'  a  dentist.  We  got  pretty  near  everything." 

"How  long  were  you  up  there  before?"  asked  Mrs. 
Mar,  still  feeling  her  way  with  this  queer  character,  who, 
with  his  wife,  might  after  all  be  decent  fellow-passengers 
for  Hildegarde. 

"We  was  in  two  summers  an'  one  winter." 

"Your  wife,  too?" 

"Oh,  yes,  she  kep'  us  alive.  If  y'  wus  to  see  her  y' 
would  n't  think  she  looked  like  she— 

The  discreet  Jap  servant  opened  the  door,  and  seemed 
to  whisper,  "Mis'  Bumble  Bee." 

1 1  Oh,  how  do  you  do  ? "  Hildegarde  went  quickly  for 
ward  and  shook  hands  with  a  tiny,  weather-beaten 
woman. 

"I  heard  on  the  water  front  you  wus  askin'  for  me," 
said  the  new-comer,  looking  very  shy  and  embarrassed. 

"Oh!"  Mrs.  Mar  was  on  her  feet.  "Is  this  Mrs. 
Blumpitty?"  Before  that  little  person  knew  what  had 
happened,  she  was  on  the  other  side  of  the  room,  shrink 
ing  into  the  extreme  corner  of  a  big,  -red  satin  sofa— not 
unlike  some  sort  of  insect  hiding  in  the  heart  of  a  poppy. 
But  it  was  idle  trying  to  escape  from  Mrs.  Mar.  She 
prodded  her  prisoner  with  pointed  questions,  and  there 
was  no  manner  of  doubt  but  "Mis'  Bumble  Bee"  was 
intensely  frightened.  But  she  must  have  come  out  of 
the  ordeal  uncommon  well,  for  the  catechist  rose  at  the 
end  of  a  quarter  of  an  hour  (breaking  in  upon  Harry's 
glib  exposition  of  the  huge  difficulty  in  these  days  of 
floating  a  gold  mining  scheme).  "Your  wife  and  I  have 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  267 

been  arranging  things,"  said  Mrs.  Mar,  with  a  sudden 
ness  that  made  Blumpitty  blink.  "My  daughter  must 
go  on  your  ship." 

"But,  mama—" 

"Mrs.  Blumpitty  says  she  will  look  after  you  on 
board." 

"Yes,"  agreed  the  rusty  wife,  a  little  breathless. 
"And  if  she  does  n't  find  her  father  just  at  first  she  can 
stay  with  us,  can 't  she  1 ' ' 

Blumpitty,  thus  appealed  to,  said,  "Ya-as,"  so  en 
tirely  without  enthusiasm,  that  his  wife  added,  ' l  He  said 
to  me  after  we  'd  talked  with  your  daughter,  '  It  's  a.  pity 
she  ain't  goin'  on  the  Los  Angeles.  We  could  'a'  helped 
her.'  " 

"Well,  she  is  going  on  the  Los  Angeles." 

"No,  mama,  the  Congress." 

"Don't  be  pig-headed,  Hildegarde.  Why  should  you 
insist  on  the  Congress  when  here  are  Mr.  and  Mrs.  Blum 
pitty  ready  to  look  after  you  on  the  Los  Angeles?" 

"I  don't  exactly  insist,  but  I  Ve  paid  $125—" 

"You  can  change  your  ticket,  if  that  's  all,  can't  shel" 
Mrs.  Blumpitty  appealed  to  the  repository  of  wisdom  on 
the  edge»of  the  chair. 

' '  Oh,  ya-as, ' '  said  Mr.  Blumpitty. 

' ' Why  are  you  so  sure ? ' '  said  Hildegarde.  "Is  it  be 
cause  the  Congress  is  so  much  the  better  boat,  as  your 
big,  tall  friend  said  ? ' ' 

"He  ain't  right  about  that,  though  he  's  a  mighty 
smart  feller.  Been  to  Harvard  College,"  he  said,  for 
Mrs.  Mar's  benefit.  Then,  as  one  adducing  a  destiny 
higher  still,  ' '  The  Los  Angeles  has  been  a  Manila  trans 
port." 


268  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"But  why  does  everybody  seem  to  want  to  go  in  the 
Congress  ?" 

"Sails  four  days  earlier,"  said  Blumpitty  unmoved. 
"But"— he  glanced,  or  no,  Blumpitty  never  glanced; 
with  apparent  difficulty  he  rolled  his  pale  eye  heavily 
over  to  Mrs.  Mar— "settin'  out  's  one  thing,  gettin'  in  's 
another.  'T  ain't  likely  the  Congress  '11  see  Nome  'fore 
we  do." 

"Anyhow,  what  are  four  days  compared  to—?"  Mrs. 
Mar  turned  briskly  upon  her  daughter.  "Mrs.  Blum 
pitty  is  going  to  see  that  you  have  all  the  necessary 
things,  and  if  you  're  sick  she  's  going  to  look  after 
you." 

As  Mrs.  Blumpitty  did  not  instantly  corroborate  this 
result  of  the  fifteen  minutes  in  the  red  satin  corner, 
"You  promised  me  that,"  said  Mrs.  Mar,  with  a  sudden 
ness  that  sounded  less  like  maternal  solicitude  than 
truculence,  "and  7  promised  you  should  n't  be  a  loser 
by  it." 

"Yes— oh,  yes,  ma'am,  I  '11  do  all  I  said."  Merely 
looking  at  Mrs.  Mar  seemed  to  galvanize  Mrs.  Blumpitty 
into  heroic  mastery  of  her  shyness.  She  clasped  her  thin 
hands  in  their  gray  cotton  gloves  tightly  together,  and 
felt  herself  called  upon  instantly  to  prove  her  present 
knowledge  and  prospective  usefulness. 

"H-have  y'  got  a  boy's  rubber  coat,  comin'  to  the 
knees?"  she  inquired  of  the  younger  lady. 

" No, "  said  Hildegarde.    " Ought  I—  ? " 

"Yes,  you  must  have  that,  must  n't  she?" 

"Ya-as." 

1  ( And  waterproof  boots  ? ' ' 

"I  've  got  them." 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  269 


"With  asbestos  soles?" 
"Oh,  I  don't  know." 


' '  They  're  the  best. ' ' 
"Get  them,"  commanded  Mrs.  Mar. 
"And  one  thing  you  can't  do  without  is  a  blue  denim 
prospecting  dress." 

"I  think  I  have  something  that  would  do,  though  I 
don't  expect  to  go— 

"Has  your  dress  got  knickerbockers  and  skirt  to  the 
knee?"  She  saw  Miss  Mar  and  her  mother  exchange 
glances,  but  she  felt  instinctively  the  elder  lady  would 
see  the  reasonableness  of  the  provision. 

"No,"  said  the  young  lady,  "my  skirts  are  ankle- 
length." 

"Ought  n't  to  be  a  hairbreadth  below  the  knee,"  said 
Mrs.  Blumpitty,  with  more  firmness  than  she  had  yet 
shown. 

"No  skirt  at  all  is  best,"  observed  Mr.  Blumpitty 
dryly. 

"What!"  said  Harry  Mar,  whom  every  one  had  for 
gotten. 

"Jest  full  knickerbockers,"  said  Blumpitty,  without 
so  much  as  looking  at  the  objector. 

"Oh,  that  won't  be  necessary  for  me,"  said  Miss  Mar. 
"  'T  will,  if  you  want  to  go  prospectin'."    Valiantly 
Blumpitty  supported  his  wife's  view.    "You  can't  wear 
a  skirt  on  the  trail. ' ' 

"I  don't  think  I  shall  go  on  the  trail,"  said  the  pusil 
lanimous  Hildegarde,  "unless  my  father— 
"Better  be  ready,"  said  Blumpitty. 
"What  else  do  you  advise?"  said  Mrs.  Mar,  glancing 
at  the  clock. 


270  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"She  ought  to  have  a  sou'wester,  don't  you  think?" 
says  Mrs.  Blumpitty  to  Mr.  Blumpitty. 

"Ya-as,  and  a  tarpaulin  to  lie  on  in  the  swamp." 
"Well,"  said  Mrs.  Mar,  "nobody  can  accuse  you  two 
of  over-coloring  the  delights  of  life  up  there." 

"It  's  a  splendid  place,  Alaska  is,  if  you  go  with  the 
right  things,"  said  Mrs.  Blumpitty. 

"And  if  you  come  away  with  the  right  things,"  sup 
plemented  Mrs.  Mar. 

"Oh,  she  must  bring  back  a  claim,  must  n't  she?" 
Mrs.  Blumpitty  appealed  to  her  husband. 
Harry  and  his  mother  exchanged  looks. 

Well,  never  mind  about  that, ' '  said  Mrs.  Mar.  ' '  But 
if  you  see  after  my  daughter  and  do  what  you  said,  you 
won't  be  losers  by  it." 

"No,  indeed,"  said  Harry,  with  emphasis. 
"Mrs.  Blumpitty,"  quoted  Mrs.  Mar,  "Mrs.  Blum 
pitty  says  she  '11  see  that  Hildegarde  is  properly  cooked 
for  up  there,  and  she  '11  even  get  her  washing  done." 
"Oh,  yes,  I  can  do  that  myself.    I  'm  used  to  it." 
"You  don't  look  very  strong,"  said  Hildegarde. 
"I  was  n't  before  I  went  to  Alaska,"  she  answered 
proudly. 

"Ya-as,"  agreed  her  husband.  "Always  terrible 
sickly  till  she  went  up  there.  Euth  's  jest  the  same." 

"Who  's  Ruth?"  demanded  Mrs.  Mar. 

"That  's  my  niece,"  said  Mrs.  Blumpitty. 

"You  had  her  along  last  year?" 

"Yes,  and  she  's  comin'  again.  She  would  n't  miss 
comin'  fur  anything.  Ruth  's  twenty-five,"  Mrs.  Blum 
pitty  explained  to  Miss  Mar.  "Reel  nice  girl.  Been  a 
nurse.  You  '11  like  Ruth." 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  271 

It  was  as  if  the  ' '  reel  nice ' '  Ruth  finally  settled  things. 

"Give  Harry  your  Congress  ticket,  Hildegarde,  and 
he  '11  see  about  changing  it.  Even  if  he  can't,  I  've  made 
up  my  mind  you  must  go  on  Mrs.  Blumpitty's  ship. 
Don 't  let  the  grass  grow,  Harry,  we  must  catch  the  night 
train  home." 

When  Harry  had  ceased  to  cultivate  grass  in  Jacob 
Dorn's  parlor,  the  Blumpittys  seemed  to  think  their 
audience,  too,  was  at  an  end.  They  stood  close  together 
and  muttered  embarrassed  leave-taking. 

"Wait  till  my  son  gets  back,"  interrupted  Mrs.  Mar. 
"He  ought  n't  to  be  more  than  twenty  minutes.  There 
are  one  or  two  things  I  'd  like  to  know."  The  fact  did 
not  elude  Mrs.  Mar  that  when  she  had  headed  off  their 
escape,  Mrs.  Blumpitty  had  taken  refuge  in  the  chair 
nearest  her  husband,  and  was  edging  it  as  close  to  him  as 
she  could  conveniently  get — for  protection,  it  would 
appear.  And  Blumpitty  himself,  as  feebly  he  resumed 
his  perch,  looked  more  than  ever  depressed  and  vague. 
Mrs.  Mar  needed  no  reminder  that  few  husbands  and 
wives  are  as  communicative  together  as  either  may  be 
apart.  "Hildegarde,"  she  said,  "take  Mrs.  Blumpitty 
up  to  your  room  and  see  how  much  of  your  outfit  's 
right.  Show  her  your  list  and  take  notes  of  what  she 
tells  you." 

Having  cleared  the  deck,  Mrs.  Mar  by  a  cross  fire  of 
questions  drew  forth  a  story,  no— queer  fragments, 
rather,  of  the  history  of  the  Blumpittys'  fight  for  exist 
ence  during  sixteen  months  spent  in  a  tent  upon  the  icy 
tundra,  with  a  few  Esquimau  neighbors  and  no  white 
soul  for  many  a  mile.  Mrs.  Mar  forgot  to  look  at  the 
clock,  even  grew  strangely  friendly  with  Blumpitty,  in 


272  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

her  absorption  in  so  congenial  an  occupation  as  drawing 
out  and  clarifying  an  inarticulate,  rather  muddled  male. 
Finally,  "The  papers,"  quoted  Mrs.  Mar.  "the  papers 
say  that  all  the  claims  are  staked." 

Without  the  smallest  emphasis,  "I  know  that  ain't 
so, ' '  said  the  man  dully. 

"How  do  you  know?" 

' '  I  been  there. ' '  Mrs.  Mar  digested  this.  ' '  I  know, ' ' 
Blumpitty  went  on,  "a  place  where  no  white  man  but 
me  and  one  other  has  set  foot— rich  in  gold." 

"Where  's  that  other  man?" 

"Under  the  tundra  'long  o'  the  gold." 

She  tried  not  to  betray  her  interest.  She  even  suc 
ceeded.  "And  that  's  the  place  you  're  going  up  now  to 
work?" 

"No,  ma'am,  I  ain't  talked  to  folks  about  that  place." 

Mrs.  Mar  waited  to  hear  why. 

But  Blumpitty  seemed  to  have  no  intention  of  en 
lightening  her.  "The  property  we  're  goin'  to  work  this 
summer  is  the  nineteen  claims  belongin'  to  Blumpitty 
&  Co.,  up  on  Glaysher  Crick.  They  're  already  located, 
an'  recorded,  an'  surveyed,  an'  a  year's  assessment 
work  done." 

"How  much  have  people  put  into  this  company  of 
yours  ? ' ' 

"Right  smart,"  he  said  cryptically.  "What  with 
my  folks  and  my  wife's  folks  an'  our  party— had  to  give 
them  a  look  in— only  fair.  But  we  're  goin'  to  keep  it 
among  ourselves  's  much  as  possible.  They  ain't  any  of 
us  rich,  not  now,  but"— he  smiled  a  pale,  pale  smile  all 
to  himself,  that  seemed  to  say  the  future  was  beyond 
per  adventure  golden.  "We  all  been  workin'  people,"  he 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  .273 

said,  grave  again  as  ever.  "But  we  've  all  saved  a  little 
somethin '. ' ' 

"And  you  're  putting  your  savings  into  this?" 

"Every  cent.  We  know  $250  put  into  Blumpitty  & 
Co.'s  this  spring  '11  be  a  thousand  'fore  long."  Instead 
of  rejoicing,  he  sighed.  "We  've  worked  mighty  hard, 
but  we  got  our  chance  now. ' '  He  rested  on  the  thought 
a  moment.  "They  's  a  fortune  fur  us  up  on  Glaysher 
Crick—  'nough  fur  us  all. ' '  His  pale  eyes  seemed  inad 
vertently  to  take  in  Mrs.  Mar. 

That  lady  presented  her  most  baffling  surface.  Abso 
lutely  nothing  you  could  take  hold  of.  Whether  her 
aspect  discouraged  Mr.  Blumpitty  or  not,  certainly  he 
seemed  to  have  no  more  conversation. 

Mrs.  Mar  was  obliged  herself  to  break  the  silence. 
"So  you  're  pretty  well  satisfied,  anyhow." 

"Ya-as,"  he  said,  "if  only  I  can  keep  out  o'  the  hands 
o'  the  f y-nance-eers. " 

"What  's  to  prevent  you?" 

"Oh,  I  guess  it  's  all  right"— but  his  look  was  dubious. 
"I  got  a  good  many  mouths  to  feed  an'  a  lot  o'  devel- 
opin'  to  do." 

"You  mean  you  have  n't  got  enough  capital."  She 
felt  she  had  caught  him.  She  was  both  disappointed  and 
rather  relieved. 

"I  got  some  capital,  like  I  told  you.  An'  I  could  get 
plenty  more  if  I  was  n't  so  afraid  o'-  He  paused,  and 
seemed  to  envisage  afresh  some  subtle  and  merciless 
foe.  Mrs.  Mar's  sharp  eyes  pecked  him  all  over.  If  they 
had  left  a  mark  wherever  they  had  been,  Blumpitty 
would  have  presented  no  surface  the  size  of  a  cent  that 

was  not  pitted  as  with  virulent  smallpox.    It  might  well 
IB 


274  COME  AND  FIND  MB 

have  inspired  confidence  that  he  bore  up  as  well  as  he 
did. 

''What  is  it  you  're  'afraid'  of?"  demanded  Mrs.  Mar. 
"Losin'  personal  control.    But  I  'm  all  right  s'  long  's 
I  keep  hold  o'  fifty-one  per  cent,  o'  the  stock." 

' '  Why  fifty-one  per  cent.  ? ' '  She  must  understand  this. 
"So  's  to  have  the  decidin'  vote.  So  's  I  can  do  the 
directin'  myself.  Watch  it"— his  pale  eyes  brooded— 
"  an '  manage  it,  an '  make  a  reel  success  of  it. ' '  You  got 
the  impression  that  the  scheme  was  bound  up  not  only 
with  his  fortune  but  with  his  pride.  "If  I  'm  at  the 
head  o'  the  thing  I  can  see  that  the  'riginal  investors 
don't  get  froze  out  by  the  f y-nance-eers. " 

"Well,  have  n't  you  kept  fifty-one  per  cent,  of  the 
stock?" 

"Yes,  I  got  more  'n  that  now.  Blumpitty  &  Co.  's 
only  jest  started." 

Mrs.  Mar  had  a  moment's  thrill  out  of  the  sensation  of 
being  there  "at  the  start."  But  she  sternly  repressed 
any  glimmer  of  betrayal.  ' '  I  suppose, ' '  she  said,  with  an 
intention  of  irony,  "that  you  're  ready  to  let  in  a  few 
more  private  subscribers?" 

"I  'm  in  favor  o'  lettin'  in  one  or  two."  He  fell  into 
thought  undisturbed  by  Mrs.  Mar's  silent  pursuit,  peck 
ing  here,  pecking  there.  "I  wus  thinkin'  I  'd  like  your 
daughter  to  have  somethin'." 

"Oh,  my  daughter  's  putting  all  she  has  into  her 
trip." 

But  Mr.  Blumpitty  was  doing  some  more  thinking. 
Gravely  he  brought  out  the  result.  "It  ain't  many 
young  ladies  would  want  to  take  that  journey  jest  to 
nurse  their  fathers. ' ' 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  275 

Mrs.  Mar  looked  at  him  coldly.  "She  has  n't  got  any 
thing  to  invest  in  gold  mines."  And  then  she  was  sorry 
she  had  admitted  this.  If  the  man  thought  of  Miss  Mar 
—or,  say  Mrs.  Mar— as  a  probable  investor,  it  might 
make  a  difference. 

But  apparently  quite  unchilled,  Mr.  Blumpitty  was 
drawling,  "Wa-al,  if  she  comes  with  us,  I  could  very 
likely  help  her  to  locate  a  claim  of  her  own." 

Even  that  handsome  offer  seemed  not  to  "fetch" 
Mrs.  Mar. 

And  still  he  was  not  daunted.  "I  said  to  Mrs.  Blum 
pitty,  'That  's  the  kind  o'  young  lady  I  'd  like  to 
help/' 

No  sort  of  direct  acknowledgment  out  of  the  young 
lady's  mother.  But  presently,  "Just  at  this  juncture 
I  want  to  give  my  daughter  all  I  can  spare,  or  I 
would  n't  mind  putting  something  into  your  company 
myself." 

You  might  think  he  heard  only  the  end  of  the  sen 
tence.  "It  's  a  good  investment,"  he  said. 

"It  's  quite  possible  that  later—"  Mrs.  Mar  threw 
in,  feeling  herself  very  diplomatic.  "Just  at  present 
the  only  funds  I  have  in  hand  are  what  my  eldest  son 
has  sent  to  supplement  his  sister's." 

"Ya-as,  I  wus  thinking,"  said  Blumpitty,  as  though 
in  complete  agreement,  "when  she  buys  her  stuff  at 
Baumgarten's  she  'd  better  get  it  through  me,  and  then 
she  '11  pay  only  wholesale  rates.  That  '11  be  a  savin'.  I 
could  save  her  freight  charges,  too." 

"Is  n't  she  getting  wholesale  rates  anyhow?" 

"No.  They  won't  make  no  difference  fur  a  little  six 
weeks'  order  for  one  person.  I  'm  gettin'  food  and  camp 


276  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

outfit  fur  twenty-eight  people  fur  two  years.  They 
make  a  reduction  fur  that." 

It  seemed  reasonable;  and  really,  these  simple  people 
were  disposed  to  be  very  serviceable. 

She  thought  of  Trenn's  brotherly  letter  of  good-by 
and  his  handsome  contribution  of  $300,  reposing  at  that 
instant  in  the  yellow  bag  that  hung  at  her  belt.  Well, 
suppose  she  used  "the  money  for  Hildegarde"  in  a 
double  sense.  Suppose  she  got  some  stock  in  Hilde 
garde 's  name.  It  was  all  my  eye  about  Blumpitty's 
wanting  to  help  "that  kind  of  young  lady"  just  because 
she— fudge!  Mrs.  Mar  was  "from  Missouri!"  But  it 
very  probably  would  help  the  girl  with  her  new  friends 
that  they  should  look  upon  her  as  financially  interested 
in  their  enterprise— should  think  of  her  obliged  and 
grateful  family  as  a  probable  source  of  further  revenue. 
Odd  if  it  were  Mrs.  Mar  after  all  who  should  be  the  cause 
of  the  Mar  family's  profiting  by  the  gold  discovery  at 
Nome.  But  she  would  do  nothing  upon  impulse. 

"I  think  I  could  send  you  two  or  three  hundred  be 
fore  you  sail, ' '  she  said. 

Mr.  Blumpitty  looked  on  the  floor,  and  made  no  man 
ner  of  response. 

1 '  How  would  that  do  V '  and  she  repeated  the  offer. 

"I  can't  promise  they  '11  be  any  o'  the  margin  left  by 
the  time  we  sail." 

"Why  can't  you?" 

' '  Wa-al,  I  got  to  keep  fifty-one  per  cent,  fur  myself. ' ' 

She  'd  heard  all  that.  "How  much  a  share  is  your 
stock?" 

"It  's  only  $25  now.  But  I  guess  it  won't  ever  be  as 
low  again.  This  time  next  year—  He  felt  for  his 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  277 

watch.  When  he  saw  what  time  it  was  this  year,  slowly 
he  pulled  his  slack  figure  together  and  stood  up. 

"You  're  going  to  wait—  '  began  Mrs.  Mar. 

' 1 1  promised  t '  meet  a  man  about  now. ' ' 

"Somebody  who  wants  to  join  your  company ?"  said 
Mrs.  Mar,  with  a  pang. 

"I  guess  so." 

' '  I  could  take  twelve  shares  to  start  with,  only— ' ' 

"I  guess  y'  better  talk  it  over  with  y'  son."  Blum- 
pitty  had  stooped  and  was  feeling  under  the  chair  for  his 
hat. 

"  It  is  n  't  that, ' '  said  Mrs.  Mar  a  little  sharply,  for  the 
idea  of  taking  counsel  with  her  son  appealed  to  her  much 
less  now  that  Blumpitty  recommended  it.  ' '  But  I  7m  not 
sure  I  won't  have  to  buy  a  second  ticket  for  my  daugh 
ter." 

"No  danger  o'  that." 

"And  how  do  I  know  there  's  a  good  berth  left  on 
your  steamer?" 

"I  got  twenty-eight  first-class  accommodations.  The 
young  lady  can  have  the  pick  o'  them."  He  seemed  to 
be  coming  slowly  toward  Mrs.  Mar  with  a  motion  of 
offering  his  hand,  whether  to  reassure  her  as  to  the 
solemnity  of  his  given  word  on  the  subject  of  the  berth, 
or  in  mere  good-by. 

She  arrested  him  with  her  eye.  "If  I  get  my  daugh 
ter  these  twelve  shares"— Mrs.  Mar's  hand  was  on  the 
yellow  bag— "I  do  it  on  my  own  responsibility.  I  shall 
not  consult  my  sons. ' ' 

"Wa-al,  it  's  a  good  chance,"  he  admitted,  but  in  the 
tone  of  one  not  disposed  to  deny  that  * '  all  flesh  is  grass. ' ' 
"I  'd  like  your  daughter  to  have  her  share.  They  ain't 


278  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

many  young  ladies  would  want  to  take  that  journey  jest 
to-" 

"You  'd  better  make  out  a  receipt  for  those  twelve 
shares  straight  away,  before  anybody  comes  in  and  inter 
rupts."  Mrs.  Mar  opened  the  yellow  bag. 

Blumpitty  looked  vaguely  at  the  floor.  "I  don't  know 
as  I  got  any  blanks  along." 

'  *  Blanks !    I  don 't  want  any  blanks. ' ' 

"Certificate  forms." 

"Oh— well,  look  and  see,"  she  said  peremptorily,  with 
her  glance  at  the  clock. 

Out  of  his  breast  pocket  Blumpitty  slowly  took  some 
papers.  "Only  a  dirty  one,"  he  said  sadly. 

"Well,  fill  it  out.  There  's  pen  and  ink  on  that 
table. ' '  She  was  counting  bills  on  her  lap. 

Blumpitty  stood  vaguely  looking  round  in  a  lost  sort 
of  way,  just  as  though  time  were  n't  priceless  and 
Harry's  return  at  any  moment  likely  to  complicate,  if 
not  checkmate,  "the  deal." 

"Here."  Mrs.  Mar  jumped  up  and  put  a  chair  in 
front  of  the  little  writing-table.  Then  smartly  she 
tapped  the  silver-topped  ink-bottle,  as  though  she 
doubted  his  having  the  sense  to  know  what  it  was  unless 
she  made  some  sort  of  demonstration  in  its  neighborhood. 
She  even  illustrated  the  fact  that  the  lid  lifted  up. 
Slowly  Blumpitty  had  come  over  to  the  spindle-legged 
table,  and  now  sat  in  a  heap  in  front  of  it,  looking  into 
the  ink.  Mrs.  Mar  whisked  a  pen  out  of  the  rack  and 
pushed  it  into  Blumpitty 's  slow  fingers.  "And  here  in 
this  envelop  is  $300."  She  took  it  out  and  counted  it 
over,  under  his  dull  eyes.  "But  I  '11  keep  it  till  Harry 
comes  back  and  says  it  's  all  right  about  the  ticket.  We 


Hildegarde's  mother  and  Mr.  Blumpitty 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  279 

can  just  exchange  envelops  without  saying  anything 
further.  Understand  ? ' '  She  felt  a  well-nigh  irresistible 
impulse  to  shake  Blumpitty,  but  instead  of  doing  that, 
there  she  was  signing  a  paper,  after  taking  care  to  read 
it  twice,  in  spite  of  the  pressure  of  time.  And  now, 
although  she  still  held  both  this  document  and  the  three 
hundred  dollars  in  her  own  hands,  she  was  conscious  of 
qualms. 

"I  suppose  you  '11  be  sinking  a  deal  of  good  hard 
money  in  that  creek  of  yours  this  summer,  whether  you 
get  any  out  or  not. ' ' 

' '  They  's  plenty  of  work  there, ' '  he  said,  foggier  than 
ever,  "but  I  got  more  'n  that  to  do  this  summer." 

' '  What  do  you  mean  ? ' ' 

He  looked  at  her  with  that  curious  sort  of  vagueness 
that  gives  one  an  impression  of  hearing  a  man  talk  in 
his  sleep.  You  feel  it  would  be  unfair  to  hold  him  quite 
responsible.  '-'When  I  've  got  the  work  started  all  right 
on  Glaysher,  I  got  to  take  two  or  three  people  I  c  'n  trust 
an '  go  up  to  a  place  northwest  o '  Nome. ' ' 

" What  place?" 

"Polaris." 

"What  do  you  want  to  go  there  for,  when  you  Ve  got 
nineteen  claims  to  look  after  on  Glacier— 

"Them  nineteen  claims  is  valyerble  property,  and 
Blumpitty  &  Co.  's  goin'  to  pay  handsome  dividends. 
This  time  next  year — ' ' 

"Well,  what  do  you  want  more  than  that?" 

He  paused,  and  then  in  that  same  somnambulist  tone, 
"I  wus  n't  lookin'  fur  it,"  he  said,  "I  jest  tumbled  on 
it." 

"What?" 


280  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"A  great  big  thing  up  by  Polaris.  Bigger  'n  anything 
Blumpitty  &  Co.  have  got  on  Glaysher.  Bigger  'n  any 
thing  any  company  's  got  anywhere." 

Impossible  to  think  a  man  boastful  or  even  over-san 
guine,  who  spoke  so  wearily,  with  yellow-gray  face  so 
unlit,  with  air  and  attitude  so  joyless.  ' '  It  '11  make  mil 
lionaires  of  a  good  many  people. ' ' 

There  was  silence  in  Jacob  Dora's  parlor.  Mrs.  Mar 
had  refused  to  credit  a  story  of  this  sort  once  before. 
Her  unbelief  had  not  only  cost  her  a  great  fortune;  it 
had  cost  her  happiness.  She  sat  in  silence,  reflecting. 
But  she  gave  no  sign. 

"People  have  got  so  's  they  don't  take  much  stock  in 
any  feller's  talkin'  'bout  the  Mother  Lode.  I  don't 
blame  'em  myself. ' ' 

"It  turns  out  as  stupid  sometimes  to  be  too  skeptical 
as  to  be  too  credulous, ' '  quoth  Mrs.  Mar. 

Mr.  Blumpitty  did  not  applaud  the  sentiment.  He 
looked  sadly  at  the  lady  and  then,  as  though  the  effort  to 
hold  up  his  eye-lids  were  too  great,  he  rested  his  heavy 
eyes  on  the  silver  rim  of  the  ink-pot.  ' '  Everybody  knows 
they  must  ~be  a  Mother  Lode  some'ers  around  up  there." 

"Why  must  there?" 

"Wa-al,  I  don't  know,"  said  Blumpitty  impartially. 
"P'raps  the  gold  come  down  from  Heaven." 

1 '  Don 't  talk  nonsense. ' ' 

Well,  if  it  don 't  come  from  Heaven,  the  gold  they  're 
findin'  at  Nome  an'  in  the  Klondike,  and  the  noo  camps 
—all  the  loose  placer  gold  o'  the  North,"  he  reflected, 
"if  it  ain't  come  down  from  Heaven,  it  's  been  washed 
an'  weathered  and  glayshered  out  o'  some  reef  or  range, 
or  great  natchrul  store-house," 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  281 

"Yes.    I  Ve  read  about  that." 

He  nodded  faintly.  "Ya-as,  that  's  what  they  all 
say.  Every  man  believes  in  a  Mother  Lode.  But  what 
no  man  likes  to  believe  is  that  another  man  's  found 
her." 

Again  silence. 

Vivid  description  would  have  failed  to  picture  for  this 
particular  auditor  what  Blumpitty's  slow  and  clumsy 
words  conveyed  as  though  by  chance.  So  little  did  he 
play  the  game  in  the  usual  way  that  Mrs.  Mar  felt  the 
satisfaction  of  the  discoverer  in  getting  at  the  story 
through  barriers  and  in  despite  of  veils. 

In  the  silence,  up  above— in  Jacob  Dorn's  sick  cham 
ber—some  one  was  heard  opening  the  window. 

"And  you  think,"  Mrs.  Mar  spoke  very  low,  "you 
think  you  know  where  the  Mother  Lode  is  ? " 

"Pretty  near  every  miner  in  the  Northwest  thinks  he 
knows. ' ' 

"You  mean  you  are  sure?" 

"I  'm  forty-eight,"  said  Blumpitty  mournfully. 
"It  's  twenty  years  since  I  liked  sayin'  I  was  sure." 

"But"  (he  was  the  sort  of  man  that  needed  reassur 
ing)  "you  Ve  got  good  ground  for  believing—"  She 
waited. 

"Last  fall"— he  looked  round  the  red  satin  room  as 
though  for  possible  haunts  of  eavesdroppers,  and  then 
he  further  interrupted  himself— "you  must  n't  think 
I  found  it  myself,"  he  said  modestly.  "I  got  a  tip— a 
straight  tip." 

"From  the  man  that  's  dead." 

"Ya-as.  Leastways,  they  said  he  had  n't  more  'n  a 
few  days  to  live.  Ya-as,  dyin'  up  there  at  Polaris! 


282  COME  AND  FIND  MB 

Everybody  in  the  camp  knoo  he  'd  struck  it  rich.    No 
body  could  find  out  where." 

"How  did  they  know  he  'd  struck—" 

"Becuz  he  wus  so  secret  about  everything.  Where 
he  'd  come  from.  Where  he  wus  goin'  if  he  got  well, 
and  most  of  all"— Blumpitty  looked  round  and  sunk  his 
low  voice— "where  he  got  his  nuggets  and  dust  from." 

"Oh,  he  had  nuggets- 

"Yes,  nuggets  and  dust,  too.    Good  and  plenty." 

' '  He  showed  it  to  you  ? ' ' 

"No.  He  wus  terrible  secret  about  it.  Terrible 
afraid  somebody  'd  rob  him.  Kind  o'  sick  you  know 
about  it."  Slowly  Blumpitty  tapped  his  yellow-gray 
forehead.  "But  he  allowed  he  'd  found  something 
worth  while  an'  he  never  let  his  bundle  o'  dust  out  o' 
sight.  Day  an'  night  he  kep'  it  jest  under  his  hand. 
Everybody  nosin'  around,  tryin'  to  be  friends  with  him. 
One  day  I  wus  passin',  an'  his  dawg  went  fur  me.  I 
picked  up  a  stone.  'Don't  y'  do  it,'  he  calls  out  o'  the 
sod  cabin,  where  he  wus  layin'  with  the  door  open. 
'Don't  y'  do  nothin'  to  that  dawg,'  he  says.  I  explained 
the  dawg  wus  doin'  things  to  me.  'Come  in  here,'  he 
said,  'an'  she  won't  touch  you.'  So  I  did,  an'  we  talked 
a  while." 

"Well?" 

He  asked  me  kind  o'  sarcastic,  was  I  'lookin'  fur  the 
Mother  Lode?'  I  said  I  guessed  I  wus  n't  no  different 
from  other  men,  except  that  I  wus  n't  hangin'  round  a 
sick  man  fur  to  get  his  secrets  out  o'  him.  'No,'  he  said, 
'I  ain't  never  seen  you  hangin'  round.'  An'  then  he 
told  me." 
"What?" 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  283 

"I  says,  'I  'm  figurin'  on  findin'  the  Mother  Lode  up 
in  them  hills  yonder.'  'That  's  right,'  he  said,  an'  his 
eyes  wus  kind  o'  wild  an'  glassy.  'Up  over  yonder?'  I 
said.  'Yes,'  says  he;  'up  North.  That  's  where  the 
Mother  Lode  is.'  An'  I  think  from  what  he  said,  he  'd 
called  his  discovery-claim  'The  Lode  Star.'  3 

"What  made  you  think—" 

"Course  he  wus  kind  o'  queer— out  of  his  head,  y' 
know,  fur  he  called  it  the  'Mother  Lode  Star.'  An'  he 
wus  terrible  secret  a-bout  it.  All  the  time  gettin'  away 
from  the  subject  and  talkin'  about  the  dawg." 

"Well—" 

"Wa-al,  they  wus  n't  more  'n  half  a  dozen  people  at 
Polaris  then,  an'  nobody  'd  found  anything  to  make  a 
boom  out  of.  But  they  all  hung  on.  And  they  made 
presents  to  that  feller,  took  him  grub  regillar.  An' 
other  folks  kep'  comin'  jest  becuz  that  man  wus  there. 
An'  they  all  knoo  he  'd  struck  it  rich.  An'  they  all 
knoo  he  wus  dyin'.  That  was  what  they  wus  waitin' 
for.  I  did  n't  wait,  even  them  few  days  they  said  he 
had  to  live.  The  snow  wus  beginning  t'  fly  an'  I  had 
to  go  back  to  Glaysher  and  get  Mrs.  Blumpitty  an'  our 
party  out  before  navigation  closed.  But  I  said  to  my 
self,  'I  '11  risk  it— fur  the  Mother  Lode!'  An'  I  did. 
Went  up  over  the  hills  to  the  north,  in  a  bee  line  from 
that  cabin  o'  his  till  I  come  ter—  Blumpitty 's  voice 
dropped  still  lower  and  he  hesitated,  while,  like  one  who 
scarce  dares  move  lest  he  break  some  spell,  slowly  he 
looked  round,  and  seemed  to  forget  how  to  turn  back. 
He  remained  so,  sitting  awry,  listening. 

"It  's  only  some  one  moving  about  in  Mr.  Dorn's 
room  overhead.  You  found  the  Mother  Lode?" 


284  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

He  found  he  was  able  to  twist  himself  back  by  dint  of 
drawing  out  his  watch.  "When  I  get  t'  thinkin'  about 
it  I  clean  forget  the  time."  He  stood  up.  "I  guess  I 
got  t'  be  goin'." 

Footsteps  and  low  subdued  voices  in  the  hall.  Hilde- 
garde  had  seen  her  brother  from  an  upper  window,  and 
had  come  down  with  Mrs.  Blumpitty  to  let  Harry  in. 

There  would  be  no  trouble  in  selling  "Berth  21"  for 
the  third  time. 

Mrs.  Mar,  about  to  hand  an  envelop  to  Mr.  Blumpitty, 
wondered  to  herself,  ' '  How  much  of  a  fool  am  I  ?  Well, 
I  have  n't  done  fool-things  all  along  the  line,  like  most 
people.  If  I  must  commit  foolishness  before  I  die, 
I  '11  do  it  all  in  a  lump  and  be  done  with  it."  Where 
upon  she  handed  Mr.  Blumpitty  the  envelop.  He 
seemed  to  be  giving  Harry  his  address.  Mrs.  Blumpitty 
was  making  an  appointment  to  meet  Miss  Mar  "at  ten 
o'clock  to-morrow,  at  Baumgarten 's. " 

For  the  third  time  Mrs.  Mar  was  reading  through  a 
paper  she  held  in  her  hand.  When  she  came  to  the  ill- 
written  signature,  "How  do  you  spell  your  name?"  she 
demanded  of  Mr.  Blumpitty. 

"  B-1-u-m-p-i-t-t-y , "  said  the  gentleman  mournfully. 

"Humph,"  said  Mrs.  Mar,  head  on  one  side  and  eyes 
fixed  so  critically  on  the  name  that  Mrs.  Blumpitty 
hastened  to  the  defense.  "It  's  French,"  says  she. 

"French!"  echoes  Mrs.  Mar.  "How  do  you  make 
that  out?" 

"Well,  that  's  what  his  grandmother  always  told  him. 
She  said  it  was  originally  Blank  Peed."  Wherewith, 
having  vindicated  the  family,  she  shook  hands  and  led 
the  way  out.  Harry  was  opening  the  outside  door  for 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  285 

them.  No  one  spoke  above  a  whisper,  on  account  of 
Mr.  Dorn. 

"Good-by,  Mr.  Blumpitty." 

"Good-by,  ma'am." 

"Look  here"— Mrs.  Mar  detained  him  for  a  last  aside 
— "you  've  got  twenty-eight  people  to  see  after,  and  a 
company  to  manage,  and  nineteen  claims  to  develop, 
why  can't  you  be  content  with  that?" 

He  looked  at  her.    ' '  Would  you  be  ? "  he  asked  simply. 

Her  face  told  tales.  "You  mean" — she  hesitated — 
"if  I  'd  got  on  the  track  of  the  Mother  Lode?" 

' '  Jest  so, ' '  said  Blumpitty,  and  slowly  he  followed  his 
wife  out  of  the  Great  Importer's  house. 


CHAPTER  XVI 

JLDEGARDE  learned  other  things  the  next 
morning  besides  how  to  do  your  marketing 
for  two  years  in  an  hour.  She  brought 
away  from  Baumgarten's  the  renewed  im 
pression  that  Mrs.  Blumpitty  was  a  person 
of  some  practical  sense,  and  that  Mr.  Blumpitty,  though 
he  might  be  an  authority  upon  the  Mother  Lode  and  an 
estimable  character  to  boot,  did  in  reality  himself  need  a 
good  deal  of  looking  after.  It  is  impossible  to  say  just  how 
the  "unlogical"  feminine  mind— in  this  case  young  and 
ignorant  as  well— may  arrive  at  so  definite  a  conclusion 
out  of  a  small  assemblage  of  apparently  trifling  data. 
For  Hildegarde 's  judgment  was  not  founded  merely 
upon  the  outer  man.  Nor  was  it  contributed  to  very 
largely  by  Mr.  Blumpitty 's  indifference  to  small  econo 
mies,  as  shown  in  his  readiness  to  order  gallons  of  ex 
pensive  " olive"  when  cotton-seed  oil  was  as  cheap  as 
wholesome  to  cook  with,  and  Mr.  Blumpitty  convicted 
by  his  wife  of  inability  to  detect  any  difference  in  taste. 
It  was  not  merely  that  Mrs.  Blumpitty  was  the  one  to 
offer  reasons  why  methylated  spirit,  though  cheap  on 
the  bill,  was  dearer  in  actual  use  than  alcohol.  It  was 
not  that  he  had  forgotten  after  sixteen  months'  expe 
rience,  "what  a  cravin'  you  get  up  there  fur  sweet  and 
fur  sour,"  and  what  a  failure  the  California  dried  fruit 
had  turned  out  the  year  before.  Had  he  complained  he 

286 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  287 

could  n't  eat  such  insipid  stuff  till  Mrs.  Blumpitty  had 
' '  livened ' '  it  with  a  dash  of  vinegar  as  well  as  sugar  and 
spice  ?  Wa-al,  p  'raps  he  had ! 

"You  must  n't  give  me  dried  apples  from  any  place 
nearer  here  than  Michigan,"  said  Mrs.  Blumpitty. 

The  Baumgarten  Brother  had  smiled  a  little,  and  said, 
"She  knows." 

The  upshot  of  the  morning  was  to  give  Hildegarde  an 
inkling  that  the  chief  use  of  Mr.  Blumpitty,  so  far  as  she 
was  concerned,  might  be  that  he  would  keep  her  family 
soothed  by  the  illusion  that  this  respectable  man,  pledged 
to  her  service,  was  ' '  going  to  see  that  everything  was  all 
right."  For  the  rest,  should  she  not  perhaps  do  well  to 
imitate  his  spouse,  and  not  expect  any  one  to  be  wide 
awake  in  her  interest  who  was  half  asleep  before  his 
own?  Although  he  had  said,  "Ya-as,  it  's  all  right 
about  the  ticket,"  Miss  Mar  interviewed  the  steamship 
people  on  her  own  behalf.  "Quite  right!"  they  in 
dorsed  Mr.  Blumpitty 's  account  of  the  matter.  And  as 
to  the  berths,  Mr.  Blumpitty  already  had  twenty-eight, 
and  had  sent  word  he  wanted  a  twenty -ninth,  "a  per- 
tickler  good  one  fur  a  lady."  "Noospaper  woman  I 
presoom, ' '  said  the  agent  politely.  It  seemed  to  be  only 
the  press  that  inspired  such  respect.  She  was  more  glad 
than  ever  of  the  offer  that  had  come  that  morning  from 
Eddie  Cox,  editor,  now,  of  the  "San  Miguel  Despatch." 
"Yes,"  she  told  the  agent,  "I  am  to  be  a  Regular  Cor 
respondent."  In  all  sorts  of  ways  she  saw  her  status 
incomparably  improved  by  falling  in  with  Eddie  Cox's 
suggestion.  It  appeared  to  be  necessary  to  stand  well 
with  a  "noospaper"  woman.  "What  accommodation 
can  I  have?" 


288  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"Why,  the  best  we  got." 

' '  Is  there  much  choice  ? ' ' 

"We  put  you  down  here,  with  Mr.  Blumpitty's 
party. ' '  A  number  was  indicated. 

"I  'd  like  to  see  the  cabin." 

"Seeitl" 

"Yes,  before  I  decide." 

Impossible.  If  she  did  n  't  take  and  pay  for  the  berth 
now,  in  an  hour  it  would  be  in  other  hands.  But  seeing 
her  quite  unhustled  by  this  horrid  alternative,  the  agent 
said  he  would  make  a  great,  an  unheard-of  exception  in 
her  case,  and  promised  to  take  her  over  the  ship  as  soon 
as  the  Los  Angeles  came  up  from  Tacoma,  where  she  was 
being  elaborately  refitted,  "new  paint,  electric  light, 
everything."  It  would  be  a  pity  for  a  "noospaper" 
woman  to  go  in  any  meaner  vessel. 

The  crowds  that  composed  the  sailing  list  besieged  the 
offices  day  by  day,  wildly  impatient  at  the  date  of  de 
parture  being  "a  little  postponed"  while  the  Los  An 
geles  was  further  embellished  for  their  reception. 
"Style  's  all  very  well.  But  gettin'  there  's  the  thing." 

And  among  them  this  girl,  with  only  half  her  ticket 
paid  for,  coming  in  twice  a  day  to  keep  track  of  events. 

At  last,  after  a  night  of  riot,  when  the  office  was  very 
nearly  pulled  about  the  company's  ears,  all  Seattle 
knew  that  the  much-heralded  steamer  had  been  brought 
up  from  Tacoma  and  was  at  the  Seattle  wharf.  The 
crowds  on  the  water  front  could  see  her,  glaring  and 
white  and  respect-inspiring,  but  guarded  like  the  gate 
of  Paradise. 

"Let  's  go  and  see  our  quarters,"  Hildegarde  sug 
gested,  meeting  Mr.  Blumpitty  in  the  street. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  289 

"Wish  we  could,"  said  Blumpitty  sadly.  "No  one 
allowed  aboard  till  sailin'  time,  nine  o'clock  to-morrer. ' ' 

Hildegarde  spoke  of  the  agent's  promise. 

c '  Promise !  Oh,  yes,  promise  anything. ' '  And  Blum 
pitty  moved  gloomily  away  in  the  crowd. 

Hildegarde  found  the  agent  without  loss  of  time.  He 
was  overwhelmed  with  work.  Did  n  't  she  see ! 

What  she  saw  was  a  clay-faced  individual,  with  a 
slight  bulge  in  one  lean  jaw  where  he  stored  his  tobacco — 
red-eyed,  unwashed,  and  obviously  irritated  by  her  reap 
pearance.  His  promise— quietly  she  insisted.  The 
anaemic  visage  twitched,  and  he  attended  to  another  cus 
tomer.  But  she  stood  waiting,  and  she  looked  as  if  she 
were  prepared  to  camp  there  till  she  'd  had  her  way. 
Oh,  these  women!  They  wus  always  like  that— fussin' 
and  naggin '  and  goin '  on ! 

He  attended  to  two  other  customers.  They  did  n't 
expect  such  things  of  him.  But  there  she  still  stood 
with  her  eyes  fixed  upon  the  agent,  blockin'  up  the  way, 
waitin ',  waitin '.  ' '  What  'd  I  do  if  they  all  expected  me 
to  go  runnin'  round  the  wharves  with  'em!"  he  de 
manded  in  an  angry  undertone. 

"You  promised,"  she  began,  glancing  at  the  fact  that 
there  were  three  other  clerks  in  the  office. 

"Mr.  Blumpitty  's  satisfied ! "  he  said  severely,  pointing 
out  the  lamentable  contrast.  And  he  'd  taken  her  for  a 
lady.  A  lady  would  believe  a  gentleman  when  he  told 
her  it  was  all  right— and  not  worry  him.  But  though 
she  must  have  seen  plainly  how  she  was  still  further 
lowering  the  agent 's  lofty  ideal  of  how  a  lady  should  be 
have,  there  she  stood  looking  at  him  with  a  grave  steadi 
ness  that  held  no  hope  of  her  yielding  her  point.  "Prom- 

19 


290  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

ise!  promise!" — why,  it  was  damned  good-natured  of 
him  to  make  a  promise,  but  to  expect  him  to —  He  bent 
toward  her.  "Look  yere,"  he  said  in  an  angry  whisper, 
'  *  I  ain  't  got  a  special  permit  yet. ' ' 

"I  11  wait  till  you  get  it." 

"Can't  have  it  yere  before  three." 

"Very  well,  I  11  come  at  three,  but  you  must  please 
not  disappoint  me  again,  or  else  I—  He  jerked  away. 
As  he  saw  her  going  out — Now  what  did  she  mean? — 
"or  else  she — "  You  never  know  what  pull  these  noos- 
paper  women  have  got. 

He  had  forgotten  all  about  her  when—  0  Lor! 
There  she  was  upon  the  stroke,  like  fate. 

"Well,  well,  did  she  promise  not  to  tell  none  o'  the  rest 
o '  the  passengers  ?  All  right,  then.  Come  ahead. 

He  led  the  way  to  the  docks  with  every  circumstance 
of  secrecy;  dodging  through  back  streets,  lying  to  ac 
quaintances  as  to  where  he  was  going,  and  gradually 
growing  cheerfuller,  pausing  to  exchange  humorous 
asides  with  friends  along  the  wharf.  Hildegarde,  wait 
ing,  silent,  patient,  during  these  passages,  was  entirely 
aware  of  the  curious  looks  bent  upon  her,  and  saw  that 
her  expedition  with  this  little  rat  of  a  man  was  held  by 
some  to  have  a  "larky"  aspect  (save  the  mark!).  She 
saw  it  was  incredible  to  these  people  that  the  agent 
should  take  this  trouble  for  any  other  reason  than  that 
she  was  an  attractive  young  woman  who  had  smiled 
upon  this  poor  little  drink-sodden  creature,  and  was 
giving  him  the  rare  sensation  of  being  "a  sad  dog  with 
the  ladies."  Even  playing  at  the  idea  had  quite  trans 
formed  the  agent.  Poor  little  misery!  She  knew  in 
stinctively  she  had  nothing  to  fear  from  him,  and  even 
if  he  had  been  a  different  type  she  had  no  doubt  but 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  291 

what  she  would  have  known  how  to  keep  him  in  his  place 
when  they  were  alone.  But  before  these  pals  of  his  the 
agent  put  on  sly  looks,  carried  himself  rakishly,  and 
tipped  his  hat  very  far  back  on  his  head.  Well,  it  was 
an  odd  world  evidently,  but  Hildegarde  Mar  had  come 
out  to  see  it.  Now,  after  various  formalities,  they  were 
going  on  board. 

"See !  paint  's  wet  yet.  That  's  why  I  did  n't  want  y ' 
to  come.  Spoil  y'  clo'es,  sure  's  a  gun."  Apparently  to 
morrow  the  paint  would  be  dry  as  a  bone.  Past  the 
strangely  few  decent,  though  cramped,  staterooms  of  the 
first  saloon,  each  ticketed  with  the  names  of  prospective 
occupants,  down  into  the  dim  region  of  the  second  sa 
loon,  down  into  the  intermediate,  further  down,  clinging 
on  to  ladders,  down,  down,  into  the  bowels  of  the  ship, 
Hildegarde  and  the  ferret-faced  agent  went,  looking  for 
Mr.  Blumpitty's  quarters.  And  lo!  though  that  gentle 
man  had  paid  for  first-class  accommodation— as  the  agent 
admitted— he  'd  been  "glad  to  get  the  only  accommoda 
tion  left,"  and  that  was  in  the  hold!  The  twenty -nine 
berths  were  twenty-nine  sections  of  deal  shelves,  ranged 
in  tiers  five  deep,  and  set  so  close  one  on  top  of  the  other 
you  could  not  believe  it  possible  for  a  good-sized  man  to 
insert  his  body  between  the  unsheeted  ticking  of  his 
chuck-mattress  and  the  board  above  his  head.  Hilde 
garde  stood  stooping  in  the  awful  hole  and  staring  as  one 
not  crediting  her  eyes. 

"It   '11  look  better,"  says  the  agent,  a  little  shame-  ' 
faced,  "when  the  beds  are  made.    The  company  supplies 
a  piller  each,  and  a  pair  o'  blankets." 

No  ventilation.    No  light  of  day.    One  electric  burner 
to  illumine  the  horror  of  the  gloom. 

"You  don't  mean  to  say—"  began  Hildegarde,  turn- 


292  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

ing  such  a  look  upon  the  agent  that  he  said  hurriedly: 
"No,  no.  This  won't  do  for  a  noos— fur  a  lady."  And 
they  climbed  the  ladders  back  to  day. 

He  found  the  lady  up-stairs  quarters  on  the  saloon  deck. 

"But  there  are  only  five  berths  here." 

"Best  cabin  on  the  ship,"  said  he,  spitting  with  deci 
sion  through  the  port. 

"But  on  this  card  on  the  door  there  are  five  names 
already. ' ' 

"One  's  comin'  out,"  and  he  saw  to  that  by  the  sim 
ple  process  of  drawing  an  indelible  pencil  across  "Miss 
Tillie  Jump,"  and  substituting  "Miss  H.  Mar." 

Still  the  young  lady  studied  the  card.  "Look  at 
this." 

He  looked. 

"Here,  at  the  very  top." 

"Don't  see  nothin'." 

"You  don't  see  Mr.  and  Mrs.  David  M.  Jones." 

"Oh,  yes,  I  see  them." 

"Surely  that  's  a  mistake." 

"Mistake?  No.  I  'tended  to  them  folks  myself." 
As  the  young  lady  stared  incredulous,  he  reassured  her. 
"They  're  comin'  all  right.  Tip-top  folks.  He  wus 
governor  of— 

"They  're  not  coming  in  here?" 

"Why  not?" 

"Mr.  Jones?" 

"Yes,  David  M.    He  wus  governor  of — " 

"In  here,  with  all  these— ladies!" 

"Well,  one  ?s  his  wife.  Don't  you  be  afraid.  He  9s 
all  right." 

"He  can't  possibly  come  in  here." 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  293 

"He  's  got  to.  No  other  place.  Him  an'  his  wife  wus 
almost  the  first  passengers  on  the  list. ' ' 

"Well,  give  them  a  cabin  to  themselves. " 

"Oh,  see  here!  There  ain't  room  fur  no  style  like 
that  on  this  trip. ' ' 

1 t  Then  put  back  Miss  Jump  and  take  out  Mr.  Jones. ' ' 

She  saw  the  agent  blink  at  such  cool  juggling.  "Mr. 
Jones  must  go  in  a  man 's  cabin, ' '  she  explained. 

"Don't  you  know  they  're  all  full?" 

"He  can't  come  in  here,"  said  the  young  lady  in 
flexibly. 

"He  's  got  to,  that  's  all  there  is  about  it.  I  can't  go 
playin '  no  monkey  tricks  with  David  M.  Jones. ' ' 

"Then  please  find  me  some  other  place." 

"Ain't  I  already  told  you?    They  ain't  no—" 

"You  mean  you  can't,  after  all,  accommodate  me  on 
this  ship?" 

"Lord!  Lord!"  The  agent  seemed  to  pray  for  pa 
tience  and  for  light. 

"You  were  prepared  to  make  Miss  Tillie  Jump—" 
and  in  spite  of  herself,  gravity  went  by  the  board.  But 
the  agent's  smile  was  wan. 

"That  was  different,"  he  assured  her.  "Well,  here 
goes ! ' '  With  the  air  of  one  who  has  cast  the  last  shred 
of  prudence  to  the  winds,  he  wrote  out  a  new  card  from 
which  you  might  gather  that  David  M.  Jones  had  not 
been  reflected  for  this  berth.  And  so,  exit  the  former 
governor ! 

"Now  you  can't  say  we  ain't  done  everything." 

"Thank  you,"  said  Hildegarde.  "There  's  only  one 
thing  more.  I  should  like  to  bring  my  steamer  trunk  in 
to-day  and  get  settled." 


294  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

The  agent  gaped,  and  then,  with  a  gesture  of  comic 
feebleness  before  the  spectacle  presented  by  this  young 
lady,  he  sat  down  on  the  edge  of  the  berth  labeled,  "T. 
Jump,"  and  grinned. 

"The  paint  's  nearly  dry  up  here,"  urged  Miss  Mar, 
as  one  meeting  the  only  possible  objection. 

It  must  be  because  she  was  on  a  "noospaper."  Noth 
ing  else  could  give  a  woman  a  nerve  like  this.  Well,  it 
was  positively  refreshin'!  Out  of  pure  gaiety  of  heart 
the  agent  added  a  little  new  tobacco  to  the  store  already 
accumulated  in  his  cheek.  "  'T  ain't  a  bad  idear,"  he 
said.  ' '  More  'n  you  'd  like  to  try  it  on.  But  it  would  n  't 
hardly  do." 

"Why?" 

"Make  a  nawful  rumpus."  As  still  she  seemed  not  to 
understand  the  enormity  of  her  proposal.  l  i  'T  would  n 't 
be  fair  to  let  some  and  not  let  others. ' ' 

She  could  see  that.    "But  why  not  let  them  all?" 

"Oh,  haw!  haw!"  The  thing  was  somehow  deli- 
ciously  comic.  But  a  compromise  might  be  possible— 
"fur  a  noos—  Luckily  the  purser  happened  to  be  on 
deck.  Hildegarde,  to  her  stark  astonishment,  heard  the 
agent  reply  confidentially  to  some  question,  "Well,  y' 
would  n't  think  so,  but  from  one  or  two  things  she  let 

drop,  I  guess  she  's  one  o'  's  hustlers,  an'  special 

correspondent  fur  the  'New  York  Herald,'  I  guess,  an' 
Gawd  knows  what  else."  She  was  forthwith  presented 
to  Mr.  Brown,  and  it  was  arranged  that  the  "noos- 
paper"  woman  should  send  her  baggage  down  to  the 
purser's  care,  and  herself  be  allowed  to  come  on  board 
a  couple  of  hours  before  the  mob— say  at  seven  o'clock 
in  the  evening. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  295 

AT  a  quarter  before  that  hour  the  street  near  the  wharf 
where  the  Los  Angeles  lay  was  dense  with  packed  hu 
manity.  So  much  time  and  tact  it  took  to  worm  one's 
way  through  the  mass,  that  Madeleine,  who  had  come 
down  to  see  her  friend  off,  began  to  despair.  Already 
she  had  been  longer  away  from  her  invalid  than  she 
had  meant.  Hildegarde  urged  her  to  turn  back  now. 
Madeleine  looked  about  with  anxious  eyes.  "It  's 
worse  even  than  I  imagined.  It  's  terrible  to  leave  you 
here." 

"It  's  much  more  terrible  for  you  to  leave  Mr.  Dorn." 

Madeleine  did  n't  deny  that. 

"And  if  you  come  further  there  's  no  telling  when 
you  '11  get  out.  It  will  be  worse  going  back  against  the 
tide." 

But  Madeleine  hesitated,  with  harassed  face. 

"I  'd  much  rather  you  went  now,"  Hildegarde  urged, 
taking  her  suit-case  from  her  friend.  "Good-by." 

Madeleine  clung  to  her  with  filling  eyes.  "I  hate 
leaving  you." 

Hildegarde  kissed  her.  "Good-by,  dear.  And  thank 
you  a  thousand  times." 

In  the  act  of  going,  Madeleine  whispered,  "Oh,  I  hope 
nothing  will  happen  to  you.  But  I  'm  frightened  to 
death.  Good-by.  Oh  dear!" 

And  that  was  the  last  of  the  old  familiar  life. 

As  slowly  Hildegarde  got  herself  and  her  suit-case 
through  the  crowd,  it  was  borne  in  upon  her  that  per 
haps  she  had  been  wrong  to  insist  that  neither  of  her 
brothers  should  come  and  see  her  off,  as  each  had  nobly 
suggested,  in  spite  of  their  unwavering  opposition  to  the 


296  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

enterprise.  She  had  made  a  point  of  their  trusting  her 
"to  do  it  alone." 

Besides,  she  was  n't  alone.  In  every  letter  she  flour 
ished  the  Blumpittys.  Where  were  those  Blumpittys 
now?  No  sign  of  them  since  yesterday.  Anyhow,  she 
had  prevented  the  boys  from  coming.  Her  fear,  not  of 
course  formulated  to  them,  had  been  that  if  they  came, 
somehow,  at  the  last  moment  they  would  try  to  prevent 
her  going.  Well— she  looked  about— they  probably 
would.  She  pressed  on,  inwardly  exulting,  outwardly 
modest  and  asking  pardon.  And  all  the  time  she  kept  a 
sharp  lookout,  as  if,  in  spite  of  everything,  she  was  ex 
pecting  some  one.  A  Blumpitty?  Not  a  bit  of  it. 

"!T  's  no  use,"  said  a  red-faced  man,  with  a  wheezy 
voice,  "not  a  lit  o'  use  yer  tryin'  to  get  through  yere." 

"There  would  be,"  said  the  young  lady,  "if  you 
helped  me  a  little." 

That  was  different.  But,  "Ye  '11  only  get  to  stand  a 
yard  or  two  further  on  till  nine  o'clock.  They  would  n't 
open  them  gates  fur  President  McKinley." 

"I  want  to  see  if  my  baggage  got  here  all  right.  I 
sent  it  hours  and  hours  ago." 

"Same  bright  idear  's  occurred  to  the  rest  of  us,"  said 
a  sharp-faced  youth.  But  they  let  the  young  lady  pass. 
And  in  the  uncertain  light  they  looked  after  the  tall, 
striking  figure,  dressed  in  close-fitting  dark  green,  wear 
ing  a  perfectly  plain  green  felt  hat,  which  was  somehow 
more  distinguishable  and  more  distinguished  set  upon  a 
head  like  that  than  if  it  had  been  furbelowed  after  the 
fashion  of  the  other  feminine  headgear  that  flowered  and 
feathered  in  the  throng.  Public  opinion  would  have  set 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  297 

her  down  as  ' '  stuck  up, ' '  from  the  way  she  carried  her 
self,  had  it  not  been  for  something  too  gentle  in  the  face 
to  support  that  view.  The  delicately  molded  chin, 
with  the  end  softly  turned  up,  gave  an  almost  childish 
look  to  the  face,  and  the  long-lashed  eyes,  at  once  eager 
and  abstracted,  why  were  they  always  looking,  looking? 
1 '  Lost  her  party,  I  guess. ' ' 

On  she  went,  changing  her  suit-case  from  one  tired 
hand  to  the  other,  looking  here,  looking  there,  just  as  she 
had  done  in  the  Seattle  streets.  She  had  gone  about  all 
these  last  days  consciously  braced  for  a  final  encounter 
with  Cheviot — a  last  attempt  on  his  part  to  make  her 
abandon  the  undertaking.  That,  of  course,  was  the  rea 
son  he  had  not  written,  nor  even  telegraphed,  to  say 
good-by.  There  was  nothing  surly,  or  even  sullen,  about 
Cheviot.  Though  they  had  parted  "like  that/7  he 
would  n't  be  willing  she  should  go  without  his  making 
some  sign.  Not  having  done  so  could  only  mean —  Oh, 
she  knew  what  it  meant. 

She  dramatized  the  coming  scene— saw  herself  being 
"quite  firm/'  defeating,  utterly  routing  him.  But  in 
order  to  carry  out  the  program  she  must  n  't  let  him  take 
her  by  surprise.  And  as  now  over  this  shoulder,  now 
over  that,  she  scrutinized  the  faces  in  the  crowd,  she 
felt  her  heart  beat  as  she  thought  of  the  coming  con 
flict.  And  the  pink  color  rose  in  her  face.  She  had 
been  afraid  "the  boys"  might  want  to  turn  her  back. 
In  her  heart  of  hearts  she  was  afraid  that  Louis,  in 
some  way  not  clearly  foreseen,  would  succeed.  She 
went  forward  with  the  sense  of  one  escaping  from  a 
definite  peril.  At  last,  rather  out  of  breath,  she  dropped 
her  suit-case  before  the  door  of  the  brightly  lighted  bag- 


298  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

gage-room.  Just  inside  was  a  man  in  his  shirt-sleeves, 
and  beyond  him — 

"There  's  my  trunk !"  she  cried  out,  with  the  cheerful 
air  of  one  descrying  a  valued  friend. 

"Want  it  checked V 

"Yes,  please/' 

"Where  's  it  goin'?" 

"To  Nome,  of  course,"  answered  Hildegarde,  panting 
a  little  and  straightening  her  hat.  "Nobody  is  going 
anywMere  else,  are  they?"  she  added,  a  little  impatient 
at  the  man's  staring  and  delay. 

"N-no.  I  guess  not.  But—"  He  grinned  good- 
humoredly.  "I  did  n't  think  you  looked  like  a  Nomer." 

Here  was  a  blow  at  the  very  start.  Hildegarde 
glanced  down  at  her  plain  clothes,  and  decided  the  man 
was  mistaken.  But  he  checked  her  trunk,  her  provision- 
box,  her  bag,  her  deck-chair,  and  her  roll  of  wraps,  and 
she,  declining  to  give  up  the  suit-case,  turned  about  to 
make  her  way  among  the  people,  massed  thicker  than 
ever  in  this  direction.  For  over  yonder,  hidden  by  the 
crowd,  was  the  gate  whose  opening  would  give  access  to 
the  Los  Angeles.  Progress  here  more  difficult  than  ever. 

Courage !  Now  if  Louis  were  somewhere  in  the  crush, 
if  those  critical  blue-gray  eyes  were  on  her,  he  would  be 
wondering  to  see  how  well  she  made  her  way,  keeping 
her  footing  and  her  temper,  gaining  inch  by  inch  her 
goal.  She  went  the  more  unflinching  as  under  the  gray- 
blue  eye.  When  it  became  obvious  that  this  pink  and 
white  gentle-looking  girl  was  intent,  if  you  please,  on 
working  her  way  to  the  barrier  in  front  of  people  who 
had  been  there  an  hour,  she  was  treated  to  an  experience 
of  unyielding  backs,  sharp  elbows,  and  surly  looks.  Why 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  299 

should  n't  she  wait  her  turn ?  Yes,  Hildegarde  reflected, 
it  was  natural  they  should  feel  that,  especially  the 
women.  Why,  how  many  women  there  were !  But  no 
Mrs.  Blumpitty,  and  no —  Hildegarde  looked  at  her 
watch.  How  the  time  had  flown.  It  really  was  rather 
odd  about  Cheviot.  He  might,  of  course,  come  still  later, 
but  suppose  he  did  n't.  It  was  almost  incredible,  and 
yet— 

If  he  did  come,  he  M  see,  at  all  events,  there  were  some 
quite  nice-seeming  women  here.  But  perhaps  they  were  n  't 
going.  This  one,  with  the  white,  white  face  under  the 
orange  hat — what  little  young  voice  was  that  beside  her  ? 
Why,  the  woman  was  holding  a  boy  by  the  hand.  He 
reminded  Hildegarde  of  Cheviot's  small  nephew,  Billy. 
She  smiled  down  into  the  solemn  little  face.  "Are  you 
seeing  some  one  off  ? " 

"Nop!"  said  the  Curlyhead  sturdily.  "Goin'  to 
Nome  meself."  And  the  crowd  cheered.  Either  that 
demonstration  frightened  him,  or  he  was  tired  and 
indifferent  to  popular  approval.  He  began  to  fret  and 
then  to  whimper.  Was  it  his  father  who  spoke  so  roughly 
and  so  thickly?  Curly  head's  whimper  blossomed  into 
wailing.  His  father  began  to  shake  him. 

"Oh,  wait  a  minute,"  said  the  tall  young  lady,  as  if 
meaning  only  to  delay  the  operation  for  a  second.  She 
set  down  the  suit-case  on  her  own  toes,  and  out  of  a 
pocket  in  the  close-fitting  green  jacket  came  a  cake  of 
chocolate,  all  glorious  in  silver  foil.  Hildegarde  held  it 
before  the  child's  distorted  little  face.  The  features 
righted  themselves  as  by  magic.  The  youngest  pioneer 
no  longer  took  a  gloomy  view  of  his  prospects. 

The  father  's  been  drinking  heavily,  Hildegarde  said 


300  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

to  herself  as  she  went  on.  Poor  wife.  Poor  little  boy. 
She  would  know  Curly  head  better  on  the  ship. 

How  strange  if  Louis  were  to  harbor  such  deep  resent 
ment  as  not  to  write  and  not  to  appear.  That  he  should 
be  the  only  one  of  her  familiar  circle  that  had  not  to  be 
dissuaded  from  coming  to  see  her  off !  If  suddenly  now 
in  the  crowd  she  should  see  him  she  would  be  almost 
glad.  After  all,  he  could  n  't  prevent  her  sailing.  What 
was  he  thinking  of  to  let  her  go  off  like  this,  without — 
Had  her  mother  been  right?  Just  then  a  woman,  in  a 
sealskin  jacket  and  with  diamonds  twinkling  in  her  ears, 
not  only  refused  flatly  to  let  Hildegarde  pass  but  an 
grily  admonished  the  men  about  her  to  stand  firm. 

The  tall  young  lady  only  changed  her  course  a  little, 
and  made  obliquely  for  the  barrier,  but  the  encounter 
with  that  woman  affected  her  more  unpleasantly  than 
the  elbowing  and  jostling  of  the  others.  She  had  a  dis 
tinct  vision  of  Louis  Cheviot's  face  as  he  had  said  "the 
kind  of  woman  that  goes  to  Nome."  It  had  been  horri 
ble  to  him  that  Hildegarde  was  not  daunted.  For  she 
had  n't  let  him  see  that  she  was.  And  now  that  woman, 
with  the  hard  face  and  the  diamond  ear-rings!— and 
Louis  too  disgusted  to  want  to  come  and  see  his  old 
friend  off,  or  even  to  send  her  a  message  of  good-by. 

She  began  to  see  how  foolish  it  was  to  expect  to  see 
him  here.  He  had  washed  his  hands  of  her. 

And  still,  in  the  back  of  her  head,  she  thought  he 
might  come— even  built  upon  it.  She  looked  back.  No, 
he  was  n't  in  sight;  but  a  tall,  grizzled  man  had  given 
the  youngest  pioneer  a  seat  on  his  shoulder.  That  was 
nice  of  the  grizzled  man. 

But  it  was  saddening  to  go  on  so  great  a  journey  with 
out  the  good-will  of  so  close  a  friend  as— 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  301 

There  was  something  very  hard  about  Louis.  He 
could  enjoy  himself  quite  comfortably,  since  he  had 
washed  his  hands  of  her.  Her  mother— (why  was 
this  man  in  front  of  her  dressed  in  oilskins?)  Yes- 
washed  his  hands  of  her.  Her  mother  had  told  her  as 
much.  Bella  and  Mrs.  Wayne  had  come  up  from  the 
country  to  the  Valdivia  G.  H.  Charity  Ball.  They  had 
stayed  at  the  great  new  hotel.  Bella  had  worn  pink  at 
the  ball,  and  danced  constantly  with  Louis  Cheviot.  She 
stayed  on  for  several  days,  and  they  drove  together  every 
evening.  People  had  begun  to  talk.  Well,  it  had 
seemed  very  possible  once.  Why  not?  And  here  was 
Hildegarde  actually  expecting  he  might  have  left  Bella 
and  come  all  that  way  from  Valdivia  just  to  wish  Hilde 
garde  God-speed  on  a  journey  he  had  loathed  the  very 
mention  of.  Idiocy.  Of  course  he  was  out  driving  with 
Bella  this  soft,  beautiful  evening.  He  would  be  thinking : 
1  'Bella  could  never  do  anything  so  unfeminine  as  to  go 
to  a  horrible  place  like  Nome !"  Bella  and  Louis.  Why 
did  she,  the  girl  struggling  here  in  the  crowd,  feel  this 
half -incredulous  aching  at  the  thought?  Bella  and 
Louis.  Natural  enough.  Even  inevitable.  The  reason 
that  she,  Hildegarde,  felt  like  this  was  that  she  was  n't 
accustomed  yet  to  being  alone,  and  it  was  so  hard  to 
reach  the  barrier  yonder.  Jack  Galbraith.  Would  he, 
too,  join  them— the  sensible  stay-at-home  folk?  Curi 
ously,  Jack  was  grown  as  dim  as  last  year's  dreams.  For 
weeks  she  had  felt  him  fading  out  of  the  old  picture. 
And  in  the  new  he  had  no  place  at  all.  Why  was 
that?  Perhaps  he  was  dead.  It  seemed  hardly  to  mat 
ter.  Should  she  ever  get  to  the  barrier? 

Oh,  how  they  pushed  and  crowded  upon  her.    It  made 
her  feel  quite  angry.     Not  so  much  with  these  poor 


302  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

struggling  people.  But  with  Cheviot.  If  he  were  here 
now,  instead  of  driving  about  with  Bella,  if  those  broad 
shoulders  of  his  were  between  Hildegarde  and—  "Oh, 
please,  please,  you  're  crushing  me." 

"Then  stand  back,"  said  a  man  angrily. 

And  he  was  n't  even  drunk. 

Over  an  hour  it  had  taken  her  to  penetrate  from  the 
outer  fringes  of  the  crowd,  by  way  of  the  baggage-room, 
to  this  gate  in  the  barrier,  chained  and  barred.  On  the 
other  side  of  it,  an  irate  dragon  on  guard,  ready  to 
breathe  fire  and  brimstone  at  the  mere  notion  of  letting 
anybody  by.  When  Hildegarde  signed  to  him,  he  only 
roared  out  over  the  heads  of  the  people,  "Nine  o'clock 
's  the  time  everybody  was  told  to  come  on  board.  If 
you  don't  like  waitin'  outside  till  the  proper  time  you 
can  go  home."  Hildegarde  tried  to  convey  across  the 
barrier  that  she  was  acting  under  instructions.  "Keep 
back,"  roared  the  dragon,  quite  as  if  he  feared  the  tall 
figure  might  contemplate  vaulting  over. 

"It  is  a  special  arrangement,"  she  said  quite  low, 
"made  by  the  purser  himself." 

"Yes,  yes,  very  likely." 

"I  assure  you  the  purser— 

"God  A 'mighty,  what  purser?" 

Still  Hildegarde  spoke  as  confidentially  as  possible. 
' '  The  purser  of  this  ship. ' ' 

"What  's  the  name  o'  the  purser  who  could  do  a  thing 
like  that?" 

"Mr.  Brown  is  his  name." 

"Brown  ain't  the  name  o'  the  purser  o'  this  ship. 
Guess  again ! ' ' 

The  crowd  exulted.    The  dodge  had  failed. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  303 

"Is  n't  this  the  Los  Angeles?" 

"Yes,  by— !"  A  gush  of  oaths  before  which  the  girl 
gasped  as  if  a  bowl  of  ice-cold  water  had  been  dashed  in 
her  face.  ' '  Oh-h !— if  Louis  heard  that !  Luckily  he  will 
never  know.  He  's  out  driving  with  Bella. ' ' 

She  took  her  courage  in  both  hands.  "I  shall  report 
you  if  you  don 't  let  me  by.  Your  own  agent  introduced 
me  to  the  Los  Angeles  purser,  and  called  him  Mr. 
Brown." 

"Purser,  purser"— more  blasphemy— "I  would  n't 
let  the  owner  of  this  ship  on  board  before  nine  o  'clock. ' ' 

"Mr.  Brown  said—" 

"Brown!  Brown!"  shouted  the  man,  goaded  to 
frenzy  by  this  feminine  obstinacy.  "Look  yere,  if  he 
was  Black  and  the  devil  himself  I  would  n't  let  ye  in 
after  the  orders  I  've  had. ' ' 

The  crowd  chuckled  and  swayed. 

The  tall  girl  craned  her  neck  over  the  barrier  in  the 
uncertain  light.  She  had  caught  sight  of  a  lurking  figure 
uncommonly  like  the  fat  purser's,  seeming  to  seek  shelter 
behind  a  bale  of  merchandise.  "Why,  there  he  is  now," 
she  said  quite  low.  "Mr.  Brown !"  No  answer,  and  the 
figure  vanished.  "Mr.  Brown!"  she  called,  in  a  clear, 
penetrating  voice.  "I  'm  here,  as  you  told  me  to  be. 
Mr.  B-" 

Hurriedly  the  tun-bellied  figure  reappeared  and  whis 
pered  to  the  dragon.  A  brief  low-voiced  altercation  be 
tween  the  two  men.  Only  one  word  distinguishable  to 
the  girl  on  the  other  side  of  the  barrier,  "noospaper." 
A  growling  menace  of  "trouble  sure"  from  the  dragon, 
and  then  the  gate  opened  a  cautious  crack.  The  noos 
paper  woman  and  her  suit-case  were  plucked  from  the 


304  COME  AND  FIND  MB 

murmuring  crowd  and  set  upon  the  ship.  She  turned  to 
thank  her  rescuer.  For  all  his  amplitude  he  had  melted 
into  air.  On  the  far  side  of  the  barrier,  under  the  elec 
tric  light,  the  crowd  murmured  and  swayed,  coupling 
the  name  of  Brown  with  opprobrium. 

The  ship  was  badly  lit  and  silent  as  the  grave.  Hilde- 
garde  felt  her  way  down  into  the  saloon,  where  a  single 
light  was'  burning.  She  found  her  cabin,  and  she  put 
a  jacket  and  a  suit-case  in  her  berth.  On  reflection,  to 
make  it  look  the  more  occupied,  she  added  a  green  felt 
hat  with  her  card  stuck  in  the  narrow  band.  Then  out 
into  the  dim  saloon.  How  strange  for  her  to  be  in  this 
place.  So  strange,  she  had  a  fleeting  notion  she  would 
presently  wake  up  and  find  herself  in  the  little  white 
room  at  home.  But  no,  for  the  purser,  who  appeared 
and  disappeared  like  some  incorporeal  essence,  was 
standing  at  the  door  of  the  saloon  with  a  pile  of  letters 
and  telegrams,  and  little  packets,  saying:  " There  's 
flowers,  too,  an'  a  box  o'  fruit  an'  a  basket.  When  the 
steward  comes,  I  '11  send  them  to  your  room." 

Last  letters  from  the  few  who  had  been  allowed  to 
know  the  name  of  her  ship,  from  her  mother  and  the 
boys,  from  Bella,  from  Eddie  Cox— no  one  had  forgotten 
her  except—  He  might  come  yet.  Even  Bella's  mother 
had  sent  a  telegram,  saying  she  hoped  Hildegarde  would 
find  the  traveling  tea-basket  a  slight  solace.  Bella  sent 
fruit,  and  wrote :  ' '  Come  back  as  much  the  same  Hilde 
garde  as  you  can.  You  won't  be  quite  the  same  I  know. 
No  one  is  after  a  great  journey.  Too  much  happens.  No, 
I  shan't  ever  see  you  again,  dearest  of  all  my  friends, 
but  let  the  Hildegarde  that  you  bring  home  be  as  much 
like  the  old  Hildegarde  as  you  can  manage." 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  305 

These  letters,  the  last  echo  of  the  old  voices.  Why  did 
she  hear  plainest  of  all  the  one  who  was  silent. 

What  was  this!  Homesick  already,  and  the  anchor 
not  yet  weighed  ? 

She  would  go  on  deck.  At  the  foot  of  the  companion- 
way  she  took  heart  of  grace,  breathing  in  gratefully  the 
whiff  of  fresh  air  that  came  down  to  greet  her.  But  half 
way  up  she  paused.  What  was  that— that  sound  like  the 
deep  groundswell  of  the  sea?  Why,  that  must  be  the 
crowd— those  people  on  the  other  side  of  the  barrier  and 
the  ever-augmenting  legions  all  along  the  water  front. 
It  was  the  sharp-featured  youth,  with  the  shifty  little 
eyes,  who  had  called  her  wish  to  check  her  baggage  "a 
brilliant  idear";  it  was  the  drunken  man  who  had 
shaken  his  little  tired  child ;  the  woman  with  the  white, 
white  face;  that  other  woman  with  the  ear-rings,  who 
hated  anybody  who  went  in  front  of  her— all  the  people 
who  had  jostled  and  elbowed  and  tried  to  force  her  back. 
Soon  they  would  be  here,  her  daily  companions.  No 
escape.  They  were  to  become  as  familiar  as  people  she 
had  known  all  her  life,  as  those  home  people  who  already 
seemed  as  far  off  as  the  dead  folk  are.  But  the  home 
people  were  n't  dead;  they  were  driving  and  dancing, 
and  they  had  nothing  more  in  common  with  Hildegarde 
Mar.  She  was  henceforth  to  be  companioned  by  that 
hungry  crowd  out  there,  with  its  vague  murmuring,  like 
the  sea  at  Monterey.  Dancing  and  merrymaking  fell 
back  into  that  far-off  world  that  she  had  left  so  long 
ago,  before  she  came  all  by  herself  to  Seattle,  all  by  her 
self  was  setting  sail  for  Nome.  Even  when  she  reached 
the  top  of  the  companionway  the  noises  on  the  wharf  still 

sounded  muffled  for  the  most  part  and  seemed  to  come 
20 


306  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

from  afar.  But  every  now  and  then  a  single  anger-sharp 
ened  note— or  a  cheer  it  might  be— went  up  into  the 
still  air  as  startling  as  a  rocket,  and  like  a  rocket  seemed 
to  burst  in  that  higher  region  and  come  falling  down  to 
earth  in  a  shower  of  sharp  broken  cries  and  strange, 
unnerving  noises.  She  remembered  the  man  who  had 
set  the  child  on  his  shoulder,  and  a  woman  with  gray 
hair.  She  seemed  to  see  them  trampled  under  foot.  The 
woman  in  the  sealskin  jacket  looked  on.  Something 
menacing  even  in  the  muted  cries,  as  though  they  pres 
aged  some  mighty  uprising  of  a  trampled  people.  Had 
there  been  sounds  like  these  abroad  in  Paris  streets  in 
the  days  of  the  Revolution?  The  solitary  girl  lent  her 
self  for  a  moment  to  that  terror  of  the  mob  which  dimly 
feels  that  no  physical  danger  on  the  earth  can  match  the 
peril  you  may  stand  in  before  the  fury  of  the  mass.  Any 
single  creature,  however  angry  or  debased,  is  a  human 
being.  But  the  mass!— the  mass  is  a  monster,  and  the 
monster  was  at  the  gate. 

Along  the  deserted  deck  she  went,  making  hardly  any 
noise,  and  listening  with  tense  nerves. 

How  strange  for  her  to  be  in  this  place  alone. 

Oh,  Louis !  Louis !  and  suddenly  she  had  stopped.  She 
was  leaning  her  head  against  a  stanchion,  and  the  tears 
were  running  down  her  face. 

But  very  soon  she  was  ashamed. 

Drying  her  eyes,  she  went  aft  on  the  upper  deck.  The 
air  was  soft  and  wooing.  All  the  harbor  full  of  ship 
ping  ;  and  lights— lights  everywhere.  The  arch  of  heaven 
was  very  wide  and  filled  with  an  infinite  dusk.  It  was 
like  some  soothing  and  benignant  presence.  She  faced 
about,  still  looking  up,  and  saw  the  keen  little  crescent 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  307 

of  the  young  moon  hanging  aslant,  seeming  to  bend  down 
over  the  Los  Angeles.  The  sight  of  the  little  moon  com 
forted  the  girl  curiously.  It  seemed  to  be  shining  so 
hopefully,  so  gallantly,  setting  its  tiny  horns  for  a  sig 
nal  just  over  Hildegarde's  ship.  She  turned  a  silver 
coin  in  her  pocket  while  she  wished,  and  in  the  dusk  she 
curtsied  to  her  Moonship.  Feeling  a  little  less  forlorn 
after  performance  of  these  rites,  she  walked  the  silent 
deck  with  firmer  step  and  the  horned  moon  for  company, 
trying  not  to  listen  to  those  sounds  down  there  upon  the 
wharf —trying  to  recapture  her  early  zest  in  this  enter 
prise.  Now  there  were  dim  figures  moving  about  the 
shadowy  deck,  and  in  the  smoking-room  a  light  was 
turned  on.  Through  the  window  she  could  see  a  group 
of  four  men.  They  stood  before  a  big  sheet  of  paper 
laid  upon  the  table,  and  they  argued  some  point  with 
anger.  Why,  one  of  the  men  was  the  little  agent!  "I 
swear  it  's  all  right"— he  raised  his  voice  excitedly— "all 
quite  regillar  an '  legal. ' ' 

A  snigger  near  where  the  girl  stood  made  her  aware 
of  the  presence  of  two  men  behind  her  there  in  the  dusk, 
one  indifferent,  half  turned  away;  the  other,  through 
spectacles  that  caught  the  smoking-room  light,  looked  in 
over  Hildegarde's  shoulder  at  the  angry  group. 

"What  are  they  arguing  so  about?"  asked  the  girl,  a 
little  anxiously.  If  either  of  the  men  outside  answered 
she  did  n't  hear,  for  the  noise  below  on  the  wharf  had 
been  growing  louder.  Surely  there  was  a  riot  going  on ! 
' ' Oh,  what  is  it  ?' '  she  asked.  ' ' What  's  the  matter  down 
there?" 

"The  matter  is  it  's  close  on  ten  o'clock,"  said  the 
man  with  the  spectacles. 


308  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"But  they  promised  to  let  the  people  in  at  nine!" 

"That  's  the  trouble." 

"Why  did  n't  they?" 

"That  's  why."  The  spectacled  face  nodded  toward 
the  smoking-room  window.  The  voices  in  there  were 
held  down  now,  but  three  of  the  faces  were  angrier  than 
ever.  The  fourth  was  sullen  and  set. 

"Won't  you  tell  me  what  is  happening?" 

"Only  a  little  false  swearing." 

"What  about?" 

"The  size  of  the  passenger  list.  The  Los  Angeles  is 
chartered  to  carry  three  hundred.  They  've  sold  over 
five  hundred  first-class  tickets." 

"Is  that  the  inspector  in  there?" 

The  spectacles  moved  up  and  down,  making  "Yes" 
with  flashes  of  light,  and  the  lowered  voice  said:  "He  's 
refused  to  sign  our  clearance  papers." 

"Then  we  won't  get  off?" 

"Oh,  probably."  The  reply  rang  so  cynical,  as  the 
spectacled  stranger  walked  after  his  silent  companion, 
that  Hildegarde  stared  the  more  earnestly  through  the 
window  at  the  drama  going  on  within. 

Did  they  ' '  square ' '  the  inspector  ?  She  only  knew  the 
party  broke  up  and  melted  away,  and  a  few  minutes 
after,  a  change  3ame  over  the  crowd  below.  A  sudden 
animation  that  exploded  in  yells.  Was  it  triumph  ?  Or 
was  it  rage?  Or  was  it  pain?  Yes,  surely  some  one  was 
crying  "Help,"  and  a  woman  shrieked,  and  now  a  sound 
like  a  flood  breaking  all  barriers  and  deluging  the  world. 
The  lights  went  up  on  a  sudden  all  over  the  ship,  and 
down  below  the  gates  gave  way.  In  an  incredibly  short 
time  the  ship  that  had  seemed  so  lonely— it  was  full. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  309 

And  the  torrent  of  humanity  that  swept  in  looked  so 
wild-eyed  and  disheveled,  angry,  and  possessed  by  evil 
passion,  that  Hildegarde  turned  and  fled  down  the  com- 
panionway,  and  hid  herself  in  her  cabin.  Ah,  yes,  she 
was  n't  much  of  a  heroine.  It  had  been  the  work  of  a 
few  seconds  to  turn  the  dim  and  silent  ship  into  a  howl 
ing,  flaring  pandemonium,  hundreds  of  angry  voices 
clamoring,  complaining,  threatening,  shouting  questions, 
muttering  hoarse  abuse.  ''The  company"— everybody 
was  blaming  the  company.  Dozens  of  people  tried  to 
force  their  way  into  the  cabin  for  five,  at  the  foot  of 
whose  authorized  list  of  occupants  stood  the  name  of 
' '  Miss  H.  Mar, ' '  and  in  one  of  whose  berths  that  intrepid 
adventurer  was  sitting  in  the  midst  of  her  possessions, 
cross-legged  like  a  Turk,  staring,  listening,  wondering 
what  was  going  to  happen  when  Governor  David  M. 
Jones  appeared.  Was  this  he?  No,  only  a  huge  young 
woman,  in  a  man's  hat  and  ulster,  who  growled  and 
muttered  unintelligibly— a  foreigner,  who  seemed  to  be 
cursing  in  Dutch.  But  this  other,  breathing  American 
fire  and  biblical  brimstone,  this  must  be  Mrs.  Governor 
Jones,  holding  up  her  skirt,  half  torn  out  of  its  gathers. 
Would  she  wreak  vengeance  for  that  as  well  as  for 
graver  misfortunes  on  the  Turk  in  the  upper  berth  ?  As 
the  night  wore  on  the  people  sorted  themselves.  Hilde 
garde  came  to  distinguish  between  the  interlopers  and 
the  women  who  belonged  in  here ;  battered  and  breathless 
and  worn  out,  but  held  together  by  a  common  bond  of 
fearsome  experience  in  getting  on  board,  and  agreed, 
besides,  in  regarding  none  too  benevolently  the  person 
who  sat  up  there  in  the  farther  top  berth,  staring  with 
wide  eyes  at  the  stories  of  what  the  others  had  suffered, 


310  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

and  herself  saying  never  a  word,  till  some  one  came  to 
the  door  to  ask  if  Miss  Mar  was  "there  all  right."  "I 
don't  know,"  said  the  nearest  woman  crossly. 

"Oh,  yes,  yes,"  said  the  Turk,  tumbling  out  of  the  top 
berth.  "Is  that  you,  Louis?"  Now  she  knew  how  sure 
she  had  been,  and  how  hugely  glad  of  his  coming.  But 
there  at  the  door  only  the  fat  purser,  who  seemed  to  have 
gone  mad.  He  stared  vacantly  at  the  young  lady,  pulled 
off  his  cap,  and  polishing  his  shining  crown  with  a  large 
handkerchief,  muttered  abstractedly:  "Gh—a,—that  's 
all  hunky-dory!"  and  hurried  away.  As  soon  as  she  re 
covered  her  breath,  Hildegarde  caught  up  her  hat  and 
went  after  him  to  explain  and  to  inquire. 

But  he  was  swallowed  in  the  crowd.  She  made  a  tour 
of  the  deck.  But  no,  one  could  n't  stay  long,  and  any 
how  Cheviot  was  n't  there.  Not  even  the  Blumpittys 
seemed  to  be  there.  Curlyhead  was  refusing  to  come  and 
be  put  to  bed,  refusing  in  terms  incredibly  sulphurous 
for  one  of  such  tender  years.  It  turned  you  sick  to  hear 
such  language  from  baby  lips. 

"Where  you  off  to ?"  said  one  man  to  another  just  in 
front  of  Hildegarde. 

"Goin'  to  report  to  the  authorities." 

"Report  what?" 

"The  rat  hole  they  're  askin'  me  to  sleep  in." 

"Plenty  o'  time.  We  ain't  goin'  to  get  off  till  to- 
morrer,  anyway." 

"What!    Why,  we  're  a  week  late  a 'ready." 

"Some  of  us  '11  be  later  'n  that.  The  authorities  are 
goin'  to  hold  back  a  couple  of  hundred  fur  the  next 
ship." 

"Who  says  so?    I  ain't  goin'  to  wait." 


COME  AND  FIND  MB  311 

"  Weir  '—he  lowered  his  voice— "there  's  inconvenient 
questions  about  over-crowdin'." 

The  raging  malcontent  of  the  moment  before  was 
straightway  tamed.  You  saw  in  his  face  that  he  would 
do  his  share  in  hushing  up  the  conditions  under  which 
he  was  to  make  the  voyage. 

As  Hildegarde  sped  along  the  last  stretch  of  the  deck 
before  going  below,  her  astonished  eyes  fell  upon  the 
giant.  Then  he  had  n't  got  off  by  the  Congress!  She 
was  about  to  ask  him  if  he  'd  seen  the  Blumpittys,  but 
some  one  else  was  surprised  to  find  the  giant  on  board 
the  Los  Angeles— a  puffing,  excited  individual,  with  a 
red  beard,  in  the  act  of  pushing  past,  stopped,  stared, 
and  then  clapped  the  giant  on  the  back.  "Gawd  A'- 
mighty !  Is  that  you ! ' ' 

"No,"  says  the  giant  calmly.  "I  'm  Ford  0' Gor 
man.  ' ' 

Again  Hildegarde  hurried  down  the  companionway, 
and  very  much  as  an  agitated  tabby  seeks  refuge  in  the 
attic,  she  clambered  into  the  top  berth  furthest  from  the 
door. 

And  Cheviot  had  never  come ! 


CHAPTER  XVII 

?HEN  she  waked  the  next  morning  it  was  to  a 
sensation  of  strange  silence  and  gentle  mo 
tion.  Why,  they  had  got  off,  then,  after  all ! 
She  was  on  her  way  to  Nome. 
She  sat  up  and  looked  about  at  the  wreck 
of  wardrobe  and  the  prostrate  bodies  of  women.  One 
made  a  noise  like  a  half-suppressed  moan.  After  a  mo 
ment  the  owner  of  the  little  sound  of  misery  got  up  and 
tried  to  put  on  a  pink  flannel  jacket.  For  some  reason 
that  simple  operation  appeared  to  be  painful.  She  was 
about  to  abandon  it.  Hildegarde,  half-way  down  from 
her  berth,  said,  "I  '11  help  you."  But  the  other  shrank 
away.  "No,  no."  She  leaned  her  forehead  against  the 
upper  berth. 

' '  You  are  n  't  sick  already,  are  you  ? ' ' 

"No,  it  's  only— they  nearly  broke  my  arm  in  the 
crush  last  night. ' ' 

"Oh-h!" 

"I  think  it  's  just  strained,  that  's  all." 

As  she  turned  round  to  sit  on  the  edge  of  her  berth, 
there,  hanging  outside  the  nightgown's  split  sleeve,  was 
the  injured  arm,  bare  to  the  shoulder,  swollen,  discol 
ored. 

"Oh!    What  have  you  been  doing  for  it?" 

"I  was  thinking  of  going  out  to  get  some  cold  water." 

312 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  313 

"Is  the  water  here  hot?"  Hildegarde  asked,  be 
wildered. 

The  woman  did  n't  trouble  to  answer. 

Hildegarde  was  investigating.  "Why,  there  's  no 
water  at  all!" 

"No." 

After  more  looking  about,  "Have  you  discovered 
where  the  bell  is?" 

The  woman  lifted  sleepless  eyes  and  gave  her  an  odd 
look.  "I  don't  expect  bells  on  this  ship." 

* '  Oh,  I  did  n  't  know. ' '  Hildegarde  put  on  her  dress 
ing-gown,  took  the  tin  ewer  and  sallied  forth.  After  a 
variety  of  adventures  she  came  back.  The  woman  lifted 
her  face  out  of  the  pillow  when  she  heard  the  sound  of 
water  splashing  into  the  tin  basin.  ' ( Oh,  they  got  it  for 
you." 

"No,  I  got  it  for  myself.  Come  and  hold  your  arm 
over,  won 't  you  ?  I  '11  bathe  it. ' ' 

A  little  surprised— a  little  doubtful,  the  woman  got 
up,  saying,  "Thank  you."  What  a  nice  voice  said  it! 
But  this  fine-skinned,  delicate-faced  traveler  was  dis 
posed  to  be  reserved.  Hildegarde  could  feel  that  for 
some  reason  she  was  suspicious  of  such  ready  friendli 
ness. 

"It  's  most  dreadfully  bruised.    How  did  you  do  it  1 " 

"I  didn't  doit." 

"Who?" 

"Oh,  a  man." 

"  How  in  the  world—  ?" 

"Against  the  barrier.  He  was  trying  to  get  in  front  of 
me.  I  told  him  he  was  breaking  my  arm,  but  he—" 
She  left  the  sentence  unfinished. 


314  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

Hildegarde 's  eyes  followed  the  last  trickle  of  cool 
water  over  the  vivid  purple  and  yellow  and  green  of  the 
swollen  bruise.  No  doubt  the  hurt  showed  the  ghastlier 
for  the  natural  whiteness  of  the  skin.  "Well,  whoever 
did  it  would  be  sorry,  I  think,  if  he  saw  your  arm  this 
morning. ' ' 

"Sorry?"     She  moistened  the  end  of  a  towel  and 
Hildegarde  helped  her  to  arrange  a  loose  compress. 
"Yes;  sorry  and  ashamed." 
"You  don't  know  them  as  I  do." 
"Know  who?" 

"Men."  Then,  as  Hildegarde  made  no  instant  re 
joinder,  "I  was  alone,"  the  woman  added,  so  pointedly 
that  Hildegarde  hastened  to  say,  "I  'm  alone,  too." 

But  the  other  seemed  not  to  believe  this,  or,  at  least, 
to  take  no  account  of  it.  "Last  night  was  n't  my  first 
battle,"  she  said;  "I  Ve  been  in  the  wars  all  my  life," 
and  with  a  weary  superiority  she  went  back  to  her  berth. 
Ah,  she  was  one  of  those  women  with  a  standing  griev 
ance  !  Hildegarde  felt  for  her  the  cheerful  forbearance 
of  the  person  who  unconsciously  takes  his  own  immunity 
from  rancor  as  a  tribute  to  his  nice  disposition  or  his 
balanced  judgment. 

Up  on  deck  a  flood  of  sunshine,  a  dazzling  sea,  a  green 
shore  not  yet  very  far  away,  a  distant  background  of 
snowcapped  mountains. 

On  board  the  Los  Angeles  few  people  yet  afoot.  There 
was  Curlyhead  dashing  about,  responding  to  Hilde 
garde's  good-morning  with  a  cheerful  oath.  She  took 
hold  of  him.  "Listen  to  me,"  she  said,  "you  are  not  to 
say  such  horrible  things." 

"Shut  up !"  and  more  of  the  same  sort.    She  dropped 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  315 

the  child  with  precipitation  and  walked  to  the  ship 's  side. 
Those  two  men  just  there  by  the  life-boat,  had  they  heard 
the  dreadful  words  ?  She  was  hot  at  the  thought.  They 
seemed  to  be  talking  about  the  boy  now,  that  spectacled 
man  and  his  friend.  The  friend  must  have  a  cold  or 
something  wrong  with  him,  for  even  on  this  glorious 
morning  he  kept  his  arctic  cap  pulled  down  over  his 
neck,  and  his  overcoat  " storm  collar"  turned  up  above 
his  ears.  Instead  of  taking  a  constitutional  before  break 
fast,  there  he  was  lounging  behind  the  life-boat.  The 
spectacled  man  got  tired-  of  so  sluggish  a  companion.  He 
left  the  muffled-up  figure  and  began  to  tramp  about  by 
himself.  Hildegarde  passed  him  with  "good-morning." 
There  was  her  steamer-chair  in  the  corner.  She  ought  to 
get  it  out  and  place  it  before  the  deck  overflowed. 

The  spectacled  man  lent  a  hand. 

"Well,  we  did  get  off,"  he  said. 

"Yes.    When  was  it?" 

"About  half  past  four,  they  say." 

"Then  this  is  Puget  Sound?" 

"Yes.  Those  are  the  Cascade  Mountains  on  that  side. 
The  Olympics  on  the  other. ' ' 

Just  then  the  giant  came  swinging  down  the  breezy 
deck. 

"Oh,  do  you  know,"  Hildegarde  asked  him,  "if  Mr. 
and  Mrs.  Blumpitty  got  on  board  all  right  ? ' ' 

"Well,"  said  the  smiling  Hercules,  "they  got  on 
board."  He  waited  a  moment.  When  the  spectacled 
gentleman  had  taken  himself  off.  "Got  your  seat?"  he 
asked. 

"Won't  this  be  a  good  place?" 

' '  I  mean  for  meals. ' ' 


316  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"Must  I  see  about  that?" 

"If  you  don't  want  to  eat  scraps  at  the  second  table  or 
the  third." 

"My  ticket  is  first-class." 

"That  's  got  nothing  to  do  with  it.    Shall  I  go  and  see 
they  keep  you  a  place?" 

"Oh,  will  you?" 

When  she  went  down  to  breakfast  she  was  bidden  to 
a  vacant  seat  on  the  giant's  left.  The  other  belonged  to 
one  of  the  two  ex-governors  on  board.  But  this  par 
ticular  excellency  was  not  up  yet.  Beyond  the  place  re 
served  was  a  lean  lathe  of  a  man,  with  a  voracious  ap 
petite.  Opposite,  sat  a  big,  shy  individual,  to  whom 
people  spoke  deferentially  as  "Senator  Cochrane." 
Next  him  a  slim,  attractive-looking  woman,  with  fair 
hair,  too  young,  you  would  have  said,  to  be  the  mother 
of  the  girl  beside  her ;  but  this  pretty  little  person  in  her 
teens  was  Mrs.  L 'Estrange 's  daughter,  so  said  the  giant. 
What  on  earth  could  be  taking  people  like  that?  The 
giant  did  n't  know.  Neither  did  the  person  next  him,  a 
gentleman  with  a  v/hite  "goatee,"  who  told  the  com 
pany  that,  as  for  himself,  though,  like  everybody  else,  he 
expected  to  get  a  claim,  he  was  taking  sixty  dozen  chick 
ens  to  Nome,  and  was  "dead  sure  to  make  a  good  thing 
of  it. ' '  He  longed  to  talk  more  about  chickens,  and  was 
obviously  disturbed  by  his  stout  friend  further  down, 
who  would  keep  shouting  remarks  to  the  chicken-mer 
chant  about  thirty-eight  horses  he  had  on  board,  and 
whose  conveyance  to  Nome  was  costing  the  fat  gentleman 
$100  apiece;  and  he  did  n't  grudge  it.  Indeed,  the 
horses'  quarters  were  so  superior  to  the  fat  gentleman's 
own,  that  he  'd  "been  thinkin'."  There  wus  one  o' 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  317 

them  horses— a  daisy  lot  they  were— but  there  wus  one 
of  'em  he  'd  taken  a  dislike  to.  Did  n't  know  why,  quite 
groundless— but  the  fat  man  was  like  that.  His  wife 
said  he  was  notional.  Perhaps  she  was  right.  He  never 
contradicted  a  lady.  But,  anyways,  he  was  goin'  to  give 
up  his  own  first-class  accommodation.  In  future  he 
would  bunk  with  the  horses.  And  the  one  he  had  a  ' '  pick 
on, ' '  the  mare  with  one  white  stocking  and  a  star  on  her 
forehead,  she  should  have  berth  147.  If  you  had  a  quite 
groundless  but  deadly  spite  against  any  one,  that  was  a 
sure  way  to  fix  her,  just  put  her  in  berth  147.  "Any 
ways—ladies  first,"  he  wound  up,  handing  to  the  pretty 
mother  of  the  young  girl  a  vast  dish,  in  which  slabs  of 
fat  bacon  floated  in  an  inch  of  grease. 

Not  only  the  horse-dealer  and  the  giant  were  attentive 
to  the  supposed  wants  of  the  three  women  who  appeared 
at  breakfast.  Two  of  the  roughest-looking  of  the  men 
had  stood  aside  on  Hildegarde's  entrance  to  let  her  go 
first,  and  there  were  those  who  warmly  recommended  the 
cold  bully-beef,  and  yet  others  who  urged  upon  her  the 
excellence  of  the  hot  buckwheats.  Could  these  be  the 
wild  animals  who  had  roared  and  ravened  outside  the 
night  before  ? 

At  Hildegarde's  end  of  the  table  sat  a  group  of  three 
who  seemed  to  have  interests  in  common.  "Mining 
men,"  the  giant  said.  They  talked  of  the  difficulty  in 
getting  all  their  machinery  on  board.  They  and  the 
giant  had  stayed  up  till  the  Los  Angeles  left  the  port  of 
Seattle,  mounting  guard  over  their  ' '  stuff. ' '  They  aired 
their  views  about  the  ship.  Plenty  of  white  paint  on  her 
(or  had  been  before  so  much  of  it  came  off  on  the  pas 
sengers)— but  the  Los  Angeles  was  a  whited  sepulchre. 


318  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

' '  Has  n  't  she  just  been  an  army  transport  ? ' '  ventured 
Hildegarde,  with  the  average  American's  unquestioning 
respect  for  anything  indorsed  by  the  Government. 

' '  Oh,  yes,  pressed  into  the  service  during  the  Spanish- 
American  war.  But  the  Los  Angeles  is  nothing  more 
nor  less  than  an  antiquated  Cunarder  from  'way  back,' 
known  to  our  grandfathers  in  the  sixties  as  the  rolling 
Boumelia.  She  got  such  a  bad  name  even  in  those  days 
of  primitive  ocean  travel,  that  she  had  to  clear  out  of 
the  Atlantic.  They  rechristened  her,  brought  her  round 
the  Horn  and  turned  her  on  to  the  Japan  trade.  Except 
for  taking  those  Johnnies  to  Manila,  she  had  n't  carried 
passengers  for  thirty  years  until  this  company  got  hold 
of  her,  crowded  in  ten  berths  where  there  'd  been  two 
before,  or  none  at  all,  and  lied  about  the  number  of  peo 
ple  they  'd  sold  tickets  to. ' ' 

In  the  act  of  shoveling  in  Boston  beans  with  his  knife, 
the  lean  individual  next  Hildegarde  paused  to  remark: 
"If  a  man  had  committed  the  worst  crime  in  the  cal 
endar,  it  'd  be  a  brutal  punishment  to  make  him  sleep  in 
the  suffocatin'  black  hole  they  've  put  me  in." 

"Exactly—  "  began  one  of  the  three  financiers,  assum 
ing  the  lean  one  to  be  agreeing  with  him. 

' '  But, ' '  interrupted  the  bean-f easter,  ' '  when  they  says 
t'  me  they  wus  n't  no  more  room,  I  says,  'Lookee  here, 
it  's  worth  anywheres  from  fifty  to  sixty  thousand  dollars 
to  me  to  be  among  the  first  to  git  there.  You  can  put  me 
in  a?M/wheres, '  I  says.  'Y'  can  do  anything  in  hell,'  I 
says,  'except  leave  me  behind.'  An'  b'  gosh  they  done 
it."  He  champed  his  beans  with  a  look  that  betokened 
renewed  relish  at  having  given  the  conversation  an  unex 
pected  turn.  Accomplished  as  this  person  was,  he,  with 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  319 

a  plate  full  of  Boston  beans  and  a  knife,  could  do  noth 
ing  as  original  with  his  food  as  the  passenger  on  the  other 
side  of  the  table  next  to  the  pretty  girl.  After  one  fasci 
nated  stare  in  his  direction,  Hildegarde  felt  it  wiser  to 
look  away.  It  was  not,  however,  that  moment 's  astonish 
ing  vision  that  prevented  her  from  eating  her  own  break 
fast.  The  giant  was  charitably  concerned.  Try  this, 
and  that.  But  Hildegarde  disposed  of  a  little  of  the 
sticky  gray  porridge  and  condensed  milk,  a  sip  of  the 
muddy  coffee,  and  then  she  played  with  the  sour  bread 
while  she  listened  to  the  conversation.  Suddenly,  whirl 
ing  round  her  pivoted  chair,  she  returned  with  ardor  to 
the  sunshine-flooded  upper  regions. 

It  looked  as  though  every  soul  who  was  n't  at  the  first 
breakfast  must  be  on  deck.  In  this  clear  and  searching 
light  Miss  Mar's  traveling  companions  stood  revealed— 
a  strange,  an  unexampled  crew.  Scraps  of  German,  of 
Swedish,  of  French,  and  of  tongues  to  which  she  had  no 
key,  floated  past  her  ear.  In  this  new  world  of  the  Los 
Angeles,  no  color  line  discoverable,  no  alien  labor  law  in 
force.  Her  eye  fell  upon  the  cryptic  faces  of  the  Jap 
anese,  and  on  familiar  types  of  negro  and  mulatto,  cheek 
by  jowl  with  lawyers,  clergymen,  and  senators.  There 
were  raw,  red  Irishmen,  and  overdone  brown  Hebrews. 
The  captain  went  by  talking  broad  Scotch  to  the  English 
doctor,  and  the  pig-tailed  crew  pulled  at  the  cordage  in 
unison  to  an  uncouth  Chinese  chant. 

And  never  was  such  sunshine,  never  shores  so  green, 
never  before  mountain  ranges  so  ethereal,  so  softly 
touched  with  snow  or  wreathed  in  cloud. 

But  the  people— the  people ! 

The  girl  wandered  about,  all  eyes,  or  sat  in  her  long 


320.  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

chair,  for  which  there  was  hardly  room  now  on  the 
swarming  deck.  She  held  in  one  hand  a  little  volume  in 
which  never  a  page  was  turned,  for  here,  moving  up  and 
down  before  her,  was  matter  more  wonderful  than  any 
history  written  in  any  book.  The  thought  she  found 
coming  up  oftenest :  What  on  earth  takes  him— or  her— 
to  Nome?  For  Louis,  it  seems,  was  in  one  thing  right. 
Here  was  no  Klondike  company  of  sturdy  pioneers,  all 
men  of  brawn,  or  Amazonian  women.  Some  such  were 
in  the  throng,  but  the  majority,  weedy  clerks  and  dys 
peptic  nondescripts.  There  went  a  man  with  only  one 
arm  to  dig  his  gold.  Several  smartly  dressed  ladies 
flashed  by  with  an  air  of  being  on  their  way  to  a  garden 
party.  Here  was  a  hollow-chested  youth  with  a  corpse- 
like  face,  crawling  painfully  about  with  the  aid  of  a  cane. 
There  were  other  children  besides  Curlyhead,  and  a  num 
ber  of  quite  old  men — one  grizzled  creature  with  both 
feet  '  *  club. ' '  What  are  they  going  to  do  in  such  a  place 
as  Nome  ?  Hildegarde  seemed  to  be  the  only  one  to  won 
der.  Every  face  shining,  every  heart  seemed  lifted  up. 
One  and  all  were  well-assured  they  had  only  to  see  Nome 
to  "obtain  joy  and  gladness."  "Nome  is  the  place," 
their  faces  said,  "where  sorrow  and  sighing  shall  flee 
away. ' ' 

Here  were  the  Blumpittys,  looking  a  good  deal  bat 
tered,  but  he,  at  least,  no  gloomier  than  common,  and  she 
beaming  like  all  the  rest.  Hildegarde  got  up  to  greet 
them.  ' '  I  looked  for  you  at  breakfast. ' ' 

"We  are  having  ours  later,"  quoth  Mrs.  Blumpitty, 
as  one  admitting  habits  luxurious.  But  since  the  second 
table  had  been  summoned  some  time  before  it  was  patent 
that  to  be  of  the  Blumpitty  party  meant  you  must  eat  at 
the  third. 


COMB  AND  FIND  ME  321 

"Are  you  comfortable  where  you  are?"  inquired  the 
rusty  one  solicitously. 

"Oh,  yes,  quite,  thank  you,"  said  Hildegarde,  a  little 
ashamed  at  being  so  infinitely  better  off  than  poor  Mrs. 
Blumpitty.  But  that  lady,  with  an  air  of  subdued  pride, 
was  presenting,  "One  of  our  party,  Dr.  Daly,"  an  im 
portant-looking  man  of  thirty  or  so,  with  a  highly  im 
pressive  manner.  "Ruth,  Ruth,  please  come  here!  My 
niece,  Miss  Sears."  "My  niece"  was  little  and  shy  and 
brown.  Hildegarde  felt  instantly  that  she  was  a  nice 
niece.  "And  this  is  Mr.  Tobin.  Dr.  Merton"— about 
nineteen  this  last  gentleman,  with  the  complexion  of  a 
lucky  girl.  "And  Dr.  Thomas."  Why,  it  rained  doc 
tors  !  Which  was  the  dentist  ?  Hildegarde  on  reflection 
decided  they  were  all  dentists.  "Oh,  and  here  comes 
Miss  Leroy  Schermerhorn ! "  Mrs.  Blumpitty  spoke  in 
the  tone  of  a  chamberlain  announcing  l '  Her  Majesty  the 
Queen!"  Through  the  crowd  advanced  the  heralded 
"business  woman  to  Blumpitty  &  Co.,"  a  lady  of  twenty- 
eight  or  thirty,  with  a  somewhat  defiant  face  under  the 
shadow  of  a  fuzzy  black  bang,  and  a  ruthless  eye.  When 
it  had  pierced  Miss  Mar  in  many  a  vital  spot,  it  fell  upon 
the  only  deck-chair  on  the  ship,  with  its  "robe"  and 
scarlet  cushion.  "Well,  you  're  making  yourself  pretty 
comfortable,"  said  Miss  Leroy  Schermerhorn.  "Like 
your  room?" 

Hildegarde  was  in  no  haste  to  reply. 

Mrs.  Blumpitty  bridged  the  chasm.  "I  was  so  glad 
when  I  heard  you  'd  got  a  berth  up-stairs. " 

"I  guess  it  cost  you  a  lot,"  said  Miss  Schermerhorn, 
with  a  snap  of  her  eyes. 

"No,"  said  Hildegarde.    "It  was  a  piece  of  luck." 

"Well,  I  'm  that  glad  and  relieved,"  said  Mrs.  Blum- 

21 


322  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

pitty,  as  the  haughty  Schermerhorn  retired  a  few  paces 
to  whisper  conclusions  in  Dr.  Thomas'  ear,  while  sur 
reptitiously  both  pursued  their  study  of  Miss  Mar.  But 
Mrs.  Blumpitty's  eye  still  angled  among  the  sea  crea 
tures  that  swarmed  upon  the  waters  of  Puget  Sound. 
With  a  little  jerk  of  satisfaction  she  landed  yet  another 
big  fish. 

" Miss  Estelle  Maria." 

Oh,  yes,  the  lady  with  the  languid  air,  the  rakish  hat 
and  red  velveteen  blouse;  this  was  the  one  who  "said" 
she  could  cook. 

"Any  more  of  our  party  up  yet?"  Mrs.  Blumpitty 
asked  her. 

"Guess  the  rest  's  asleep,"  answered  Miss  Estelle 
Maris. 

"Guess  so,  too,"  said  Mr.  Blumpitty,  with  benev 
olence.  "We  wus  all  pretty  tired."  And  that  was  the 
sole  reference  to  the  battle  of  the  night  before.  Neither 
then  nor  later  from  any  member  of  Blumpitty's  staunch 
party  a  syllable  of  complaint  at  their  quarters  on  the  ship. 

Mr.  Blumpitty  himself,  during  these  amenities  and 
some  further  conversation,  had  stood  by  the  ship's  side, 
looking  sadly  toward  Vancouver  Island. 

"There  goes  our  breakfast  horn,"  said  his  wife  at  last, 
as  one  who  offers  substantial  cheer. 

The  Blumpitty  party  melted  away;  only  the  leader 
remained.  ' '  Guess  everybody  that  ain  't  on  deck  's  either 
eatin'  or  asleep."  He  offered  it  as  a  general  comment 
upon  existence. 

"I  suppose  so,"  said  Miss  Mar. 

"And  the  smokin'-room  11  be  empty.  Will  you  step 
in  there  a  minute?" 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  323 

"Yes."     (What  on  earth-?) 

"Little  matter  o'  business,"  he  said,  leading  the  way. 

Two  men  in  one  corner  puffed  bad  cigars  while  they 

bent  over  a  glazed  paper,  whereon  a  certain  property 

was  outlined  in  red  ink.    No  one  else  there.    Hildegarde 

and  Mr.  Blumpitty  took  the  opposite  corner. 

"I  got  t'  give  y'  $25,"  said  Blumpitty,  as  one  who 
has  studied  every  alternative. 

"What  in  the  world  for?"  asked  the  young  lady. 
"Bonus  on  the  Congress  ticket."     He  had  pulled  a 
roll  of  bills  out  of  his  pocket,  and  the  breeze  in  the 
transit  from  open  porthole  to  open  door  paused  on  its 
way  to  toy  with  greenbacks  of  a  goodly  denomination. 
"I  did  n't  know  there  was  a  bonus,"  said  Hildegarde. 
"Naw,"  said  Blumpitty  vaguely,  as  he  handed  her  the 
money.    He  got  up  murmuring  ' '  breakfast. ' '    But  when 
he  found  himself  on  his  feet  he  glanced  with  slow  caution 
at  the  absorbed  faces  opposite,  still  bent  over  the  map 
of  a  mining  district,  and  lowering  his  voice,  "Did  Mrs. 
Mar  say  anything  to  you  touchin'  the  Mother  Lode?" 
"Yes." 

"Well,  don't  mention  it,  will  yer?" 
As  Hildegarde  looked  up  to  say,  "Oh,  no,  indeed," 
there  was  the  spectacled  man's  friend  at  the  porthole. 
At  least  it  looked  like  his  cap  and  his  high  collar,  for 
that  was  all  of  him  that  any  one  could  see.  Even  that 
much  vanished  the  moment  Hildegarde  raised  her  eyes. 
When  she  and  Mr.  Blumpitty  reached  the  deck  the 
arctic  cap  was  nowhere  to  be  seen.  How  had  he  disap 
peared  so  quickly  in  such  a  crowd? 

Mr.  Blumpitty  paused  a  moment  before  going  below, 
muttering  to  himself,  "I  jest  been  talkin'  to  a  gentle- 


324  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

man"— the  yellow-gray  eyes  went  over  the  heads  of  the 
throng— "a  gentleman  that  thinks  he  knows  where  it 
is." 

1  'The  Mother  Lode?" 

Blumpitty  's  pale  visage  relaxed  to  something  remotely 
like  a  smile  as  he  answered,  "But  he  don't." 

"I  suppose,"  said  Hildegarde,  "all  these  people  in  one 
way  or  another  hope  to  find  it— the  Mother  Lode,  you 
know. ' ' 

Blumpitty 's  vague  eyes  came  back  from  the  snow 
capped  range  of  the  Cascades,  and  dwelt  with  a  rumi 
nant  sympathy  upon  the  passing  faces.  "Ya-as,  they 
think  they  're  headin'  straight  fur  it.  But  they  ain't." 

"Nobody  on  all  this  ship,  or  on  all  the  other  ships  is 
really  heading  straight  but  you." 

"Wa-al"— he  seemed  to  wish  to  be  strictly,  punctil 
iously  accurate— "I  got  to  go  to  Snow  Gulch  first." 

"But  after  that?" 

"Ya-as.  After  that!"  And  Blumpitty  went  to  the 
third  breakfast-table  on  his  way  to  millionairedom  and 
the  Mother  Lode. 

The  girl  lay  back  in  her  long  chair  and  stared  at  the 
crowd,  thinking  how  strange  it  was  that  Hildegarde  Mar 
should  be  among  them,  and  even  while  she  wondered  the 
sense  of  strangeness  was  wearing  away. 

And  these  purblind,  trustful  creatures,  filled  with 
their  pathetic  hopes,  was  it  of  them  she  had  been  afraid  ? 
She  smiled  at  the  absurdity.  They  were  rough  and 
crude,  but  not  in  the  least  alarming— except  at  a  dis 
tance.  She  pondered  this,  catching  glimpses  of  a  truth 
of  wider  application.  When  the  motley  throng  had  stood 
without  the  gate  struggling  and  crying  to  be  allowed  on 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  325 

board  this  enchanted  ship,  when  Hildegarde  had  stood 
apart  from  them,  not  enlightened  by  sharing  in  their  lot, 
she  had  had  her  moments  of  misgiving,  or  rather  she  had 
been  seized  by  a  quite  childish  panic. 

And,  after  all,  what  harm  can  they  do  me?  Poor 
little  Curlyhead,  they  might  teach  him  a  few  more  bad 
words  (though  even  that  was  open  to  doubt)— one  or  two 
ignorant  girls  in  their  teens,  they  might  suffer.  But 
Hildegarde  Mar— how  could  they  hurt  a  person  twenty- 
six  years  old,  who  is  among  them  for  a  few  days  out  of 
a  lifetime.  What  's  the  good  of  me  and  my  better  ad 
vantages  if  I  can  be  injured  by  this  sort  of  thing? 

It  was  something  to  get  back  her  courage  to  be  alone 
among  these  people.  Last  night  she  had  been  under  an 
illusion  about  them.  Yes,  she  had  had  some  bad  mo 
ments,  but  they  had  come  chiefly  because  she  had  so 
set  her  heart  on  seeing— yet  no,  let  her  be  honest. 
Louis 's  neglect  had  put  her  out  of  tune,  disheartened  her 
quite  unaccountably,  but  the  worser  moments  had  come 
through  positive  fear.  And  the  fear  had  come— oh,  it 
was  clear  now— it  had  come  through  having  her  mind 
filled  with  foreboding  by  the  people  who  cared  most  for 
her.  There  was  always  that  potency  in  evil  prophecy — 
it  went  a  long  way  toward  bringing  about  its  own  fulfil 
ment.  If  good  were  foretold  you  were  afraid  to  believe 
it.  If  evil  you  were  afraid  not  to  believe. 

There  was  that  much  truth  in  the  fabled  power  of  the 
Evil  Eye.  Her  expedition  had  been  so  frowned  on,  eyed 
so  askance;  small  wonder  she  had  failed  to  keep  her 
courage  quite  untarnished.  Well,  she  had  found  out  one 
thing  on  the  threshold  of  the  journey.  It  is  the  fear  felt 
for  us  by  the  men  who  love  us  that  makes  cowards  of 


326  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

womankind;  it  is  others'  shrinking  that  goes  far  to  make 
us  quail. 

She  took  a  sheet  of  folded  note-paper  out  of  her  little 
Tennyson  and  her  pencil  traced  the  words:  "On  board 
the  Los  Angeles,  May  31,  1900.  My  dear  Louis—  '  Yes, 
she  would  write  him  a  long,  long  letter,  and  tell  him  how 
little  ground  there  was  for  fear.  But  she  would  write 
very  gently,  even  humbly,  and  get  him  to  understand 
and  to  forgive  her.  She  would  show  him  how  much 
better  his  fellow-men  were  than  he  had  given  out. 

She  remembered  with  an  instant's  loss  of  enthusiasm 
her  room-mate's  account  of  the  matter.  But  she  de 
cided  that  lady  was  of  a  carping  and  a  gloomy  nature— 
she  looked  on  the  dark  side.  Perhaps  Hildegarde  would 
feel  less  cheerful  herself  if  she  'd  had  her  arm  nearly 
broken— but  an  accident  could  happen  anywhere. 

"And  the  stoop-shouldered  man  is  the  father."  It 
was  Mrs.  Locke,  Hildegarde 's  room-mate,  who  said  the 
words,  her  eyes  on  Curlyhead.  That  person,  in  a  tower 
ing  rage,  stood  in  a  group  of  laughing  men.  They  were 
plaguing  him  just  to  hear  him  swear.  Mrs.  Locke  was 
still  very  white,  her  arm  in  a  sling.  But  what  a  nice 
face  she  had ! 

"Do  sit  here,"  Hildegarde  urged,  and  finally  prevailed. 
The  new-comer  said  very  little.  Others  stopped  in  pass 
ing  and  talked  to  Hildegarde.  Mrs.  Locke  sat  and  looked 
at  the  sea.  Before  one  o'clock  a  stiff  breeze  sprang  up. 
It  cleared  the  deck  as  if  the  people  had  been  so  many 
mosquitoes,  for  the  Los  Angeles  began  to  roll.  "I  am  a 
fair  sailor, ' '  said  Mrs.  Locke.  ' '  I  shan  't  mind. ' ' 

"Oh,  this  is  where  you  are!"  some  one  was  saying 
familiarly  just  behind  them,  Hildegarde  thought  to  Mrs. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  327 

Locke.  But  on  looking  round  she  met  the  purser's  fas 
cinating  smile.  Mrs.  Locke  got  up  instantly,  murmuring 
something  about  feeling  the  need  of  a  walk.  The  purser 
dropped  comfortably  into  the  vacant  chair. 

''Well,  my  dear,  and  how  do  you  find  yourself  this 
morning?"  As  Miss  Mar  did  not  instantly  respond, 
1 1  Go  in '  to  be  a  good  sailor  ? "  he  said,  with  a  great  display 
of  teeth. 

Hildegarde  looked  at  him  and  decided  he  was  a  little 
idiotic,  but  that  she  must  have  dreamed  the  ' '  dear. ' '  She 
answered  him  upon  that  supposition.  Still  he  talked 
rather  queerly,  she  thought,  till  the  first  horn  sounded 
for  dinner. 

*  "I  Ve  got  a  place  for  you  at  my  table,"  he  said,  get 
ting  up. 

"Oh,  thank  you,  but  I  have  a  seat  already." 

"That  don't  matter,  it  won't  go  beggin'.  I  'm  lookin' 
out  for  you  all  right, ' '  he  assured  her,  as  though  he  had 
heard  himself  accused  of  neglect.  "I  was  up  till  five 
this  mornin ',  so  I  slept  late,  or  I  'd  been  around  before. ' ' 

"It  is  very  good  of  you,  but  I  Ve  got  quite  a  good 
place.  I  won't  change,  thank  you." 

"Oh,  come  now,  don't  be  huffy.  How  could  I  tell 
you  'd  be  up  at  breakfast?  Come  along,  my  dear." 

Hildegarde  stared  at  him,  and  then  she  said  quite 
gently :  "  I  'm  not  the  least  huffy,  but  I  '11  keep  the  seat 
I  have,  thank  you. ' ' 

"Oh,  very  well!  Very  well!"  and  he  took  himself  off 
in  a  state  that  might,  perhaps,  be  described  in  his  own 
words  as  "huffy"— oh,  but  very  huffy  indeed. 

Before  Vancouver's  Island  faded  out  of  sight  every 
body  was  greatly  intrigued  to  see  the  men  of  the  British 


328  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

post  there  signaling  the  passing  ship.  What  were  they 
doing  that  for?  People  ran  about  the  decks  asking  one 
another,  ''What  's  happened?"  It  was  an  exciting  mo 
ment,  for  this  communication,  whatever  it  was,  would  be 
the  last  the  Los  Angeles'  passengers  would  know  for 
many  a  day  of  the  great  world's  happenings.  A  boom 
of  cannon  came  across  the  water.  The  news  filtered 
down  from  the  bridge :  ' '  Lord  Roberts  has  entered  Pre 
toria!" 

''And  that  's  the  last  human  sign,"  said  ex-Governor 
Reinhart,  "till  we  sight  the  ships  at  Nome." 

"Or,  better  still,"  amended  one  of  the  first  table 
financiers,  "the  last  till  we  signal  to  the  Nomites:  The 
fleet  's  behind!  We  've  won  the  race.  'Rah!  for  the 
Los  Angeles!"  The  betting  had  already  begun.  The 
run  was  to  be  anything  from  a  week  to  a  month. 

LOSING  sight  of  land  meant  losing  sunshine  and  calm 
seas,  almost,  it  would  appear,  losing  the  vast  majority  of 
the  passengers. 

The  next  few  days  saw  a  surprisingly  deserted  deck. 
The  Los  Angeles,  however  antiquated,  had  lost  none  of 
her  pristine  capacity  for  rolling.  At  least  ninety  per 
cent,  of  the  people  were  laid  low.  Most  of  the  stewards 
(all  green  hands  working  their  passage  to  Nome),  in 
stead  of  ministering  to  others  on  the  way,  were  making 
the  voyage  on  their  backs. 

Hildegarde,  the  only  one  of  her  cabin  to  leave  it, 
dragged  herself  on  deck  early  every  morning  to  find 
fortitude  by  dint  of  staying  out  in  the  air.  It  was  not 
solely  the  awful  pitching  of  the  ship,  not  even  the  added 
discomfort  of  the  dank,  cold  weather,  that  made  up  the 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  329 

sum  of  her  discomfort.  The  purser  had  got  on  her 
nerves.  Still  she  did  n't  like  snubbing  him  any  more 
than  was  strictly  necessary— not'  from  fear  of  reprisals 
(though,  beyond  a  doubt,  he  was  a  power  in  this  tiny 
kingdom),  but  because  it  was  hideous  to  her  even  to  see 
any  one 's  self-respect  hurt,  let  alone  be  the  one  to  deal 
the  wound.  Nor  could  she  help  sympathizing  with  him. 
He*  must  be  under  a  ludicrous  and  rather  pathetic  illu 
sion  about  himself  to  "go  on"  like  this.  Whenever  he 
could  be  spared  from  his  duties,  there,  wherever  Miss 
Mar  turned,  was  the  fat  purser,  practising  his  most  kill 
ing  smiles,  and  proffering  aid  and  companionship.  In 
these  gray  and  dripping  days  of  nearly  abandoned 
decks,  her  sole  refuge  was  in  the  society  of  the  giant, 
who  discoursed  pleasantly  of  sea-birds,  and  in  any  mo 
ment's  lifting  of  the  fog  pointed  out  more  whales.  And 
he  piloted  Hildegarde  's  see-sawing  steps  fore  and  aft  till 
she  found  her  sea-legs.  She  was  vaguely  conscious  that 
at  a  pinch  she  might  count  on  the  spectacled  man. 

Three  days,  now  since  she  had  had  a  sign  from  the 
Blumpittys  or  any  of  their  party  except  Dr.  Daly.  He 
had  laughed  and  said:  "They  're  all  very  busy.  Guess 
they  don't  want  to  be  disturbed." 

It  was  a  relief  when  in  the  middle  of  a  rainy  afternoon 
Ruth  Sears  came  to  the  surface.  She  was  very  wan  and 
looked  pathetic,  childish,  and  attractive,  too,  in  a  skirt 
to  her  knees,  stout  boots  and  long  gaiters.  And  she  had 
come  to  ask  Miss.  Mar  for  a  little  meat  extract  for  Mrs. 
Blumpitty. 

Hildegarde  had  not  waited  for  that  moment  to  be  glad 
she  had  disregarded  the  warm  recommendation  not  to 
bother  with  ship  supplies  of  her  own,  but  to  help  herself 


330  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

out  of  the  Blumpittys'  and  pay  at  the  end  of  the 
voyage. 

Ruth  said  sadly :  ' l  There  's  been  some  mistake.  Our 
grocery  box  can't  be  found."  Down  the  two  girls  and 
the  giant  went  to  the  regions  behind  the  dining-saloon 
to  open  the  provision-box  whose  contents  had  been  Miss 
Mar's  daily  solace.  There,  in  the  swaying  dingy  murk, 
where  the  figures  of  Chinamen  flitted,  they  opened  the 
padlocked  box  and  drew  forth  jars  of  Liebig,  crackers, 
cheese,  and  silver  packets  of  tea. 

"Oh,  it  is  kind  of  you!"  Ruth's  gentle  eyes  were  shin 
ing.  "She  has  n't  had  anything  for  forty-eight  hours, 
but  she  '11  be  able  to  eat  now." 

Poor  Mis'  Bumble  Bee! 

"I  '11  lend  you  my  alcohol  lamp,"  said  Hildegarde. 
"I  make  tea  every  afternoon  when  it  is  n't  too  rough. 
Won't  you  come  and  have  some?" 

The  wan  little  niece  going  off  with  her  hands  full, 
paused  an  instant.  ' '  If —if  I  'm  able,  thank  you. ' ' 

"You  ought  to  be  more  on  deck.  Of  course  you  're 
ill  if  you  stay  down  there." 

' '  I  could  n  't  take  care  of  them  if  I  did  n  't, "  and  she 
was  gone. 

The  next  day  the  fat  purser  was  so  all-pervading  that 
Hildegarde  felt  herself  making  up  her  mind  that  really 
something  must  be  done.  She  had  scant  patience  with 
girls  who  complained  at  this  order  of  infliction.  Her  firm 
conviction,  "It  's  their  own  fault";  though  just  how  the 
purser's  foolishness  was  hers  she  could  not  determine. 

The  afternoon  was  wild  and  rough,  the  smoking-room, 
packed  and  noisy.  The  overflow  of  men,  with  a  few 
very  subdued-looking  women,  sat  below  in  the  "Ladies' 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  331 

Saloon"— a  feebly-lit,  ill-smelling  little  room,  where  an 
aged  upright  piano  kept  company  with  a  hurly-burly  of 
freight  and  three  rickety  chairs.  Hildegarde's  fortitude 
threatened  to  give  way  after  two  minutes  of  the  foul, 
close  air.  But  up  on  deck  the  purser!  and  not  a  soul 
beside,  except  the  bean-feaster,  Mr.  Isaiah  Joslin,  trudg 
ing  up  and  down  in  oilskins,  and  the  arctic  cap  driven 
off  the  bridge  by  the  inclement  weather.  He  sat  in  the 
most  sheltered  corner  of  the  upper  deck,  obviously 
asleep,  with  arms  folded  and  head  withdrawn  into  his 
collar.  The  wind  rose  and  the  rain  swept  down  upon 
the  place  where  Hildegarde  and  the  giant  (with  inter 
vals  of  purser)  had  spent  the  morning.  Oh,  where  was 
that  giant  now?  She  moved  her  chair  to  the  better 
shelter  near  the  arctic  cap.  At  least,  the  purser  did  it 
for  her,  and  was  altogether  so  oppressive  with  his  poor 
little  gallantries  and  what  the  giant  called  his  "tooth 
some  smile,"  that  Hildegarde  felt,  whatever  the  penalty 
of  his  worst  displeasure,  in  another  moment  she  would 
be  doing  something  more  drastic  than  throwing  out 
broad  hints  which  he  either  disregarded  or  affected  to 
consider  humorous.  She  wished  now  that  before  moving 
she  had  said  something  even  he  could  n't  misunderstand. 
With  another  man  by  it  would  make  the  purser  mad 
with  fury.  In  any  case,  hardly  fair  to  subject  him 
publicly  to  a  snubbing  as  effectual  as  she  saw  was  going 
to  be  necessary.  The  arctic  cap,  for  all  the  seeming 
blindness  and  deafness  of  his  hidden  face,  might  be 
listening.  So  Miss  Mar  merely  drew  her  tartan  plaid 
up  about  her  shoulders  and  observed  with  some  gravity 
that  she  was  going  to  sleep.  The  purser  took  up  a  ro 
mantic  attitude  at  her  feet,  saying,  ' '  Good-night. ' '  Hil- 


332  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

degarde  jumped  up.  "I  '11  go  and  see  how  Mrs.  Blum- 
pitty  is." 

Getting  rid  of  the  purser  lent  a  rapture  even  to  going 
below.  And  as  she  went  she  smiled,  remembering  how 
her  mother  was  comforting  herself  with  the  thought  of 
the  Blumpittys  ("splendid  sailors"  both  of  them!) 
pledged  to  watch  over  Miss  Mar,  and  if  she  were  laid 
low  to  bring  her  sustenance  on  deck  out  of  their  private 
supplies.  Four  days  and  no  glimpse  of  either  of  her 
guardian  angels  till  this  moment,  when,  rolling  through 
the  second  saloon  on  her  way  to  smooth  Mrs.  Blumpitty  's 
pillow,  Hildegarde,  pitching  from  side  to  side,  clutch 
ing  at  anything  within  reach  to  steady  herself,  caught 
sight  of  her  stand-by,  her  protector,  the  man  who  was 
going  to  minister  to  her  and  "see  her  through,"  Blum 
pitty,  with  ghastly  visage,  clinging  to  the  knob  of  a 
cabin  door  like  a  shipwrecked  mariner  to  a  spar.  In 
these  days  of  seclusion  poor  Mr.  Blumpitty  had  sadly 
altered,  wearing  now  a  yellow-gray  beard  of  some  five 
days'  growth,  bristling  upon  a  countenance  pea-green 
and  pitiful. 

' '  Oh,  is  that  you  ? ' '  says  the  young  lady,  holding  on  to 
the  rough  board  that  covered  with  newspapers  at  meal 
time,  did  duty  down  here  for  a  dining-table.  "How  do 
you  do?" 

"How—"  Blumpitty  stopped  at  that  and  devoted 
his  entire  attention  to  keeping  hold  of  the  knob. 

Hildegarde  did  n't  quite  like  to  go  away  and  leave 
him  to  his  fate,  at  a  moment  so  abject  in  the  Blumpitty 
history,  nor  did  she  quite  know  how  to  conduct  a  con 
versation  under  these  conditions.  She  decided  frank 
ness  was  best.  So,  as  her  friend  still  clutched  and  tried 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  333 

to  steady  himself,  she  gave  way  a  little  to  smiling, 
thought  you  were  a  seasoned  old  salt,  Mr.  Blumpitty." 

He  only  rolled  his  yellow  eyes— but  no,  that  statement 
is  misleading,  for  Blumpitty  rolled  his  entire  economy. 
Yet  never  a  word  rolled  out.  Hildegarde,  wishing  to 
spare  his  feelings,  added,  as  she  turned  to  go,  "A  great 
many  people  seem  to  have  been  bowled  over  by  the 
pitching  of  this  ship." 

"No  ship,"  said  Blumpitty  in  a  sepulchral  whisper, 
"no  ship  could  make  a  man  feel  like  this." 

Hildegarde  was  alarmed.  Was  Mr.  Blumpitty  about 
to  be  snatched  from  them  by  some  fell  disease  ? 

1 '  Wh-what  do  you  think  it  is  ? "  she  inquired,  with  an 
other  lurch,  but  much  sympathy. 

He  clung  now  with  both  hands  to  his  savior-knob, 
while  the  rolling  Koumelia  worked  her  own  wild  will 
upon  Mr.  Blumpitty 's  contorted  frame.  "It  's  the 
cook,"  he  groaned. 

"The  cook!"  This  was  indeed  terrible!  His  brain 
was  giving  way! 

"Yes,"  he  went  on  hoarsely  in  an  interval  of  compara 
tive  steadiness,  "I  know  these  fellows.  If  a  sea-cook 
thinks  he  's  got  too  many  people  to  feed— he— oh, 
Gawd!— he  puts  stuff  in  the  coffee,  or  soap  in  the  bread 
—and— people  don't  want  to  eat  any  more." 

Roumelia  resented  this  aspersion  upon  her  son.  She 
shot  Mr.  Blumpitty  forward  with  extreme  violence,  and 
he,  entirely  without  volition,  found  himself  going  on 
deck.  But  perhaps  the  same  force  that  took  him  up 
brought  him  down  and  put  him  to  bed,  for  Hildegarde 
saw  him  no  more. 

Over  her  further  descent  into  that  part  of  the  ship  she 


334  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

had  been  intended  to  occupy,  it  is  considerate  to  draw  a 
veil. 

She  reappeared  like  a  mourner  at  a  funeral,  follow 
ing  at  Ruth's  side  in  the  wake  of  a  figure  borne  on  a 
mattress  between  a  steward  and  the  giant.  The  pros 
trate  form  of  poor  Mis'  Bumble  Bee,  speechless,  blind, 
deaf,  was  laid  in  the  one  sheltered  corner  of  the  deck. 
Ruth,  very  weak  and  unsteady,  went  back  to  that  fetid 
under- world  that  beggared  description,  ministering  to 
miserable  men  and  women  lying  helpless  on  shelves,  tier 
above  tier  to  the  ceiling.  Even  to  be  down  there  for  five 
minutes  was  a  thing  to  be  remembered  shuddering  as 
long  as  one  lived. 

After  putting  her  cushion  under  Mrs.  Blumpitty's 
head,  Hildegarde  glanced  round. 

"Lookin'  fur  the  purser  1"  said  Mr.  Isaiah  Joslin, 
grinning  and  holding  on  to  a  stanchion. 

"No,"  said  Hildegarde,  with  some  dignity. 

Mr.  Joslin  accepted  a  graver  view  of  life 's  possibilities. 
"That  feller  11  get  a  thrashin'  if  he  don't  look  out." 

"The  purser?" 

"Yep." 

"Why- who  will-?" 

' '  That  man  up  there  '11  be  attendin '  to  it. ' '  Mr.  Jos 
lin  nodded  toward  the  bridge.  The  Arctic  Cap  was 
scanning  the  misty  world  through  Captain  Gillies' 
glass. 

"Why  should  he?  Besides,  I  thought  he  was  an 
invalid. ' ' 

"Wa-al,  maybe  that  's  it.  P'raps  he  thinks  it  'd  be 
good  fur  his  health. ' ' 

"What  would?" 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  335 

"W'y  wallopin'  the  purser." 

1 '  What  's  he  got  against  the  purser  ? ' ' 

"Says  he  don't  like  the  color  of  his  hair.  But  as  the 
purser  ain't  got  no  hair,  it  's  my  private  opinion  the 
gentleman  up  there  don 't  like  his  f ascinatin '  ways. ' '  He 
looked  significantly  at  the  tall  girl.  Hildegarde  bent 
down  to  tuck  the  tartan  round  Mrs.  Blumpitty.  Now, 
why  on  earth  should  the  Arctic  Cap  care  how  the  purser 
behaved  to— other  people  ? 


CHAPTER  XVIII 

!HEN  Mrs.  Blumpitty  found  herself  being 
taken  below  that  first  evening,  she  revived 
sufficiently  to  protest,  and  so  frustrated  the 
giant's  amiable  design  of  carrying  her  off 
to  bed.  The  invalid  stayed  on  deck  day  and 
night,  and  instead  of  dying  as  the  captain  and  all  the 
passengers  confidently  expected,  she  got  well  and  "lived 
happy  ever  after"  on  that  voyage  upon  Miss  Mar's  sup 
plies,  sharing  even  the  fresh  eggs  which  the  giant,  by 
some  means,  acquired  daily  from  the  Nome-bound  hens. 
Hildegarde  was  sorry  she  lacked  courage  to  share  Mrs. 
Blumpitty 's  new  quarters.  But  the  "queerness"  of 
sleeping  out  of  your  bed— in  the  public  eye,  too!— al 
most  the  immodesty  of  it  (in  the  passenger  mind),  if  un- 
palliated,  as  in  Mrs.  Blumpitty 's  case,  by  threatened  dis 
solution—no,  it  was  too  daunting.  Since  Mrs.  Locke 
could  "stand  it"  in  the  cabin,  Hildegarde  must.  Even 
Mrs.  Locke's  seamanship  had  gone  down  before  the  Rou- 
melia's  roll,  but  she  was  getting  better.  She  made  fitful 
appearances  on  deck.  But  there  was  something  odd 
about  her.  You  never  knew  whether  it  was  sea-sickness 
or  distrust  of  her  kind  that  would  carry  her  suddenly 
below  when  a  fellow-passenger  stopped  to  speak  to  her. 
Fresh  from  a  raid  upon  the  provision-box,  Hildegarde 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  337 

coming  on  deck  one  evening,  found  Mrs.  Locke  in  an 
hour  of  clearing  weather  between  showers.  There  was 
even  a  strip  of  ruddy  sunset  to  gladden  the  voyager's 
heart. 

Hildegarde  looked  round  for  her  chair. 

"It  rained  two  drops  a  little  while  ago,"  observed 
Mrs.  Locke,  '  *  and  the  man  you  call  the  giant  moved  your 
things." 

"Oh,  did  he?"  Hildegarde  stood  at  the  ship's  side, 
looking  at  the  fading  red. 

By  and  by,  "Sit  on  half  my  stool,"  suggested  Mrs. 
Locke. 

"Thank  you,"  said  Hildegarde,  feeling  that  coming 
from  such  a  source  this  invitation  was  immensely  cordial. 
"It  's  very  kind  of  you. ' ' 

"No,  that  is  n't  it." 

"What  do  you  mean?" 

"You  're  the  sort  of  person  everybody  wants  to  do 
things  for."  She  seemed  to  point  it  out  as  a  fault  on 
Miss  Mar's  part. 

Hildegarde  looked  at  her  curiously.  "I  should  have 
thought  you  were  more  that  kind  of  person,  except 
for—  The  cameo-like  face  must  have  been  beautiful 
before  it  grew  so  white  and  set.  You  felt  that  a  touch 
of  color  even  now,  a  little  happiness,  would  make  it  irre 
sistible. 

' '  Except  ? ' '  Mrs.  Locke  echoed. 

' i  Well,  you  know  you  do —    Shall  I  say  it  ? " 

"Yes." 

"You  do  receive  friendliness  a  good  deal  at  the  point 
of  the  sword. ' ' 

"I  Ve  learnt  my  lesson."    As  Hildegarde  said  noth- 

22 


338  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

ing,  "Wait  till  you  are —  But  any  inclination  to  be 
more  explicit  vanished. 

Hildegarde  thought  she  had  intended  to  say,  "Wait 
till  you  're  as  old  as  I."  "I  have  a  feeling  you 
know  immensely  more  than  I  do,"  said  the  girl,  "but  I 
don't  believe  you  're  much  older." 

"I  'm  thirty-two." 

"Well,  I  'm  twenty-six." 

* '  You  don 't  look  that  much. ' ' 

"I  suppose  it  's  having  eyes  so  wide  apart." 

"No,  I  think  it  's  your  childish  chin  and  your  air  of 
believing  everything.  But,  anyhow,  my  thirty -two 
counts  double."  Then,  as  if  again  to  turn  the  conversa 
tion  away  from  herself,  "You  're  an  infant,  but  rather  a 
wise  infant,  after  all,"  she  added,  relenting  a  little. 
' '  Only  what  takes  you  to  Nome  ? ' ' 

Hildegarde  told  her.    ' '  And  what  are  you  going  f or  ?  " 

"Money." 

"Not  beach  gold,"  said  the  girl  smiling. 

"I  Ve  been  sent  for.  I  shall  be  bookkeeper  to  one  of 
the  large  companies." 

"Oh-h."  Hildegarde 's  big  eyes  were  so  obviously  un- 
congratulatory  that  Mrs.  Locke  said  firmly,  "It  's  work 
I  'mused  to." 

"But— up  there,  won't  it  be  very  rough  and  difficult 
for— for  any  one  like  you— all  alone?" 

' '  They  pay  three  times  what  I  Ve  been  getting.  I  'm 
very  lucky  to  have  the  offer,  at  least  as  I  count  luck  now. 
I  used  to  think— to  have  ambitions." 

"I  don't  wonder,"  said  Hildegarde,  betraying  a  flat 
tering  confidence  in  the  other's  powers. 

1  i  I  know  my  measure  now.    I  'm  a  failure. ' '    And  still 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  339 

there  was  no  weakness,  no  repining  in  her  tone.  Level 
and  courageous,  but  without  comfort,  wholly  without 
anticipation. 

What  shall  you  do  with  the  money  you  make  ? ' ' 

''Buy  freedom."  Was  she  thinking  of  divorce?  Ap 
parently  not,  for  she  went  on,  "No  woman  's  free  who 
has  n't  enough  to  live  on  without  asking  anybody  for  it. 
So  I  'm  going  to  Nome  to  avoid  slavery." 

1 '  Your  husband  does  n  't  mind  ? ' ' 

"He  's  dead."  No  trace  of  emotion  in  the  low  voice. 
But  yielding  to  the  invitation  in  the  girl's  eyes,  she  told 
in  brief  outline  of  a  hard  life.  The  last  six  years  of  it 
alone.  "But  as  to  that,  I  was  alone  before.  Only  people 
didn't  know  it,  and  so  things  were  easier." 

' '  How  easier  ? ' ' 

''  There  are  always  people  to  help  the  women  who 
don't  need  help"— and  then  something  of  the  disillusion 
that  followed  upon  her  husband's  death;  of  difficult 
bread-winning;  of  inforced  close  relations  with  men 
through  her  work,  and  what  she  thought  of  them.  "Ex 
ceptions?  Well,  I  suppose  so.  I  've  once  or  twice 
thought  the  exception  had  come  my  way. ' ' 

"And  were  you  wrong— always  wrong?" 

''You  see  the  kind  of  men  a  bookkeeper  in  a  western 
town  is  thrown  with— oh,  you  have  to  walk  very  warily, 
to  hold  yourself  down,  to  seem  to  misunderstand— not  to 
let  your  disgust  cost  you  your  bread  and  butter. ' '  Hil- 
degarde  looked  at  the  pure  outline  of  the  profile  again. 
It  was  all  very  well  to  talk  of  having  learnt  lessons  and 
of  being  over  thirty,  thought  the  girl.  Mrs.  Locke's 
troubles  are  n't  over  yet. 

But  perhaps  she  would  find  something  better  than 


340  COME  AND  FIND  MB 

money  on  this  journey,  a  real  friend,  or  even—  Several 
of  the  passengers  were  disposed  to  be  conspicuously  civil. 
There  was  that  lawyer  with  the  clever  face.  He  was 
walking  the  deck  now  in  the  giant's  company,  and  every 
time  he  passed  he  looked  at  Mrs.  Locke. 

"I  'm  sure  that  man  wants  to  come  and  talk  to  you," 
said  Hildegarde. 

"If  you  get  up,  I  shall  go  below." 

"Why  don't  you  like  Mr.  Meyer V 

"Why  should  I  like  Mr.  Meyer?" 

"Well,  he  likes  you.  Does  n't  that  a  little— just  a 
little—  No?  Well,  then,  there  's  another  reason.  He 
told  me  he  thought  you  were  so  plucky  that  you  ought  to 
be  helped."  As  even  this  generous  sentiment  seemed 
not  to  melt  the  lady,  "You  'd  better  be  nice  to  him," 
said  Hildegarde  lightly,  smiling  in  her  effort  to  make 
her  companion  a  little  cheerfuller.  "He  told  me  he 
could  get  you  a  Nome  lot  that  you  could  sell  by  and  by 
for  $2000." 

"Did  he  say  what  I  was  to  pay  for  it?" 

"You  don't  pay  anything,  that  's  what  's  so  beauti 
ful." 

"Really!    Why  does  n't  he  get  it  for  himself?" 

"He  '11  have  one,  too.  Everybody  will  who  knows— as 
he  does— which  are  the  forfeited  ones.  The  thing  is,  you 
must  live  on  the  lot.  Then  you  acquire  squatter's  sov 
ereignty,  and  you  can  sell  it  for  $2000." 

"I  see;  and  how  much  am  I  to  give  Mr.  Meyer?" 

"Oh,  you  are  suspicious!  He  takes  a  real  interest. 
He  wants  to  'put  you  on  to'  some  unrecorded  mining 
property  he  knows  about. ' ' 

"Yes." 

"Has  he  told  you?" 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  341 

' '  He  did  n 't  tell  me  why  a  busy  man  like  Meyer  should 
stop  to  think  of  me. ' ' 

"Do  you  think  men  never  help  women?" 

"Yes,  when  they  see  some  advantage  for  themselves." 
And  then  dark  histories.  The  general  effect  of  her  ex 
perience,  the  sum  total  of  that  knowledge  she  had 
brought  out  of  commerce  with  men,  and  which  was  al 
ways  ready  to  rise  up  and  menace  her— it  seemed  almost 
incredible  to  the  sheltered  woman.  But  it  was  not  all 
narrow,  personal  repining.  Mrs.  Locke  had  theories. 
She  had  lived  once  in  a  state  where  women  voted.  She 
told  stories  of  going  to  the  polls.  In  spite  of  the  opposi 
tion  of  male  politicians  she  had  once  herself  held  office. 

"Well,  how  did  you  like  being  a  notary  public?" 

"I  hated  it,  but  it  taught  me  things." 

"Unless  my  life  's  a  failure,"  she  said,  with  an  un 
conscious  loftiness,  "I  don't  expect  to  have  time  to 
bother  about  politics." 

"You  'd  feel  differently  if  you  did  n't  belong  to  the 
privileged  class. ' ' 

' '  Oh,  but  I  don 't.  I  belong  to  quite  plain  people.  And 
we  've  been  very  poor. ' ' 

"Have  you  ever  worked  for  your  living?" 

"No." 

"Exactly.  Intelligent  and  able-bodied,  and  yet 
you  've— 

"I  've  helped  at  home." 

"You  may  have  saved  the  wages  of  a  housekeeper  or 
a  sewing  woman,  but  you  've  taken  what  was  given  you 
as  a  dole ;  and  you  have  n 't  a  notion  what  you  'd  do  if 
the  men  of  your  family  died  or  cast  you  off.  Or— have 
you?" 

:I  never  thought  about  it." 


" 


342  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

' '  That  's  what  I  mean.  You  belong  to  what  they  call 
the  privileged  class.  The  'privilege'  is  to  know  as  little 
of  life  as  a  pet  canary." 

Hildegarde  only  laughed. 

"Oh,  yes,  you  sing  very  sweetly,  and  the  song  says 
you  've  got  all  the  rights  you  want.  Ml  it  means  is  that 
through  some  man  living  or  dead  the  singer  has  what 
material  comforts  she  needs.  And  the  burden  of  the 
song  is,  'Look  how  contented  and  feminine  I  am.  /  'm 
all  right.  With  the  mass  of  womankind  it  's  different, 
but  I  shan't  bother.'  " 

"You  think  it  's  different  with  the  mass?" 

"You  know  it  is.  Never  mind"— she  made  a  little 
impatient  move  of  the  head  as  though  to  free  her  brain 
from  some  thorny  contact— "I  've  had  my  time  of  try 
ing  to  help  the  rest.  From  this  on  I  have  just  one  ob 
ject.  I  've  made  up  my  mind  to  put  up  with  any  and 
everything  till  I  've  bought  my  freedom.  That  's  why 
I  'mhere." 

"How  long  will  it  take  you  to  buy  freedom?"  asked 
Hildegarde. 

Mrs.  Locke  clasped  one  hand  over  the  other  on  the 
railing  of  the  ship  and  leaned  her  chin  down  on  the 
whitened  knuckles.  She  fixed  her  steady  eyes  upon  the 
wave-fretted,  glaucous-looking  waste,  less  like  water  than 
like  vast  fields  of  molten  lead,  falling  into  furrows,  for 
ever  shifting  and  forever  shaped  anew.  "I  say  to  my 
self  that  if  I  slave  and  rough  it  for  five  years  more,  I 
shall  be  able  to  buy  a  little  home  in  the  country  and  know 
some  peace  before  I  die. 

It  seemed  a  gray  existence,  and  Hildegarde,  with  the 
hopeful  self-sufficiency  of  happy  youth,  felt  in  her  heart 


COME  AND  FIND  MB  343 

that  the  woman  must  somehow  be  to  blame.  Men  were 
not  always  or  usually  what  Mrs.  Locke  gave  out.  Even 
in  the  crush  at  the  wharf,  though  the  rougher  people 
had  pushed  and  jostled  and  sworn,  nobody  had  tried  to 
break  Hildegarde's  arm.  Mrs.  Blumpitty  had  roughed 
it,  but  she  did  n't  complain  of  men,  though  Blumpitty 
must  be  a  trial.  No,  poor  Mis'  Bumble  Bee,  on  her  pallet 
of  straw  in  the  corner  of  the  deck,  was  by  the  side  of  this 
other  woman  an  enviable  object  even  in  the  worst  wea 
ther,  and  the  statement  may  stand  although  it  lack  its 
true  significance  to  that  portion  of  mankind  which  hap 
pened  not  to  be  in  the  North  Pacific  or  the  Bering  Sea  in 
the  first  June  of  this  century.  Even  when  the  weather 
was  not  doing  anything  spectacular,  the  dank  chill  was 
of  the  sort  that  searched  the  marrow.  The  fogs  pene 
trated  tweed  and  mackinaw  and  even  leather,  till  peo 
ple's  apparel  wilted,  and  conducing  less  to  warmth  than 
shivering,  clung  to  their  figures  as  clammily  as  a  half- 
dried  bathing  dress.  The  rugs  and  "robes"  and  wraps 
weighed  each  a  ton— the  very  bedclothes  seemed  never  to 
be  dry.  Day  and  night  the  fog-horn  hooted,  or,  when 
the  all-enveloping  grayness  lifted  for  a  little,  it  was  only 
to  loosen  the  great  rains,  as  if  most  mighty  Jupiter 
Pluvius,  thinking  to  use  the  ship  for  his  tub,  had  pulled 
the  shower-bath  string  just  above  it,  discharging  a  water 
spout  over  the  Los  Angeles.  And  after  that,  sleet,  mist 
drizzle,  and  fog  again. 

Every  man  on  board  began  to  suffer  visibly  and  au 
dibly  from  the  national  complaint.  In  vain  they  hawked 
and  spat  and  trumpeted;  the  great  American  Cold  had 
them  by  the  nose.  All  they  could  do  in  their  misery  was 
to  reduce  compamonway  and  deck  to  a  condition  best 


344     .  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

left  undescribed.  But  it  was  this  more  than  any  other 
thing  that  made  the  heart  of  the  unhappy  Hildegarde  to 
falter  and  grow  faint. 

There  were  moments  when,  too  chilled  to  sit  still,  worn 
out  with  tramping  up  and  down,  wet,  and  yet  more  mi 
serable  by  reason  of  certain  sights  and  sounds,  she,  never 
theless,  rather  than  face  the  greater  horror  below,  would 
stay  on  deck  all  day,  wondering  a  little  sometimes  that 
she  could  suffer  so  much  acute  physical  misery  and  yet 
not  rue  her  coming.  For  even  now,  the  moment  she  en 
visaged  a  possible  escape— a  passing  yacht  that  should 
take  her  luxuriously  home,  or  any  pleasant  miracle  of 
rescue— she  discovered  that  come  what  would,  she  was 
not  only  bound  to  keep  on,  but  as  determined  to  see  it 
through  as  she  had  been  that  night  of  Louis's  return, 
when,  innocent  of  most  that  it  implied,  she  had  said  she 
would  go  and  bring  her  father  home. 

In  the  carrying  out  of  her  resolution  there  was  noth 
ing,  as  yet,  to  be  afraid  of  in  the  sense  she  vaguely  had 
supposed  her  brothers  and  Louis  Cheviot  to  mean,  but  of 
sheer  physical  wretchedness  and  soul-sickness,  enough 
and  to  spare  for  the  chastening  of  any  spirit. 

There  had  been  a  good  deal  of  heavy  drinking  in  the 
last  day  or  two.  As  for  Curlyhead's  father,  he  seemed 
never  to  be  sober,  and  yet  he  had  wits  enough  left,  as  well 
as  cash,  to  bear  a  hand  in  endless  games  of  poker.  At 
first  there  had  been  little  card-playing.  But  now,  as 
people  began  to  grow  used  to  the  motion,  they  crawled 
out  of  their  berths  to  look  at  the  world  from  the  upper- 
deck,  shiver  and  go  below.  Down  there,  what  was  there 
to  do  but  the  one  thing  1  If  you  played  once,  you  played 
every  day,  and  all  day,  and  more  than  half  the  night. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  345 

People  who  could  n't  as  yet  sit  at  the  table  to  eat,  sat 
there  between  meals  breakfasting,  dining,  supping  off 
"chips"  and  bits  of  pasteboard— not  missing  fleshpots, 
since  always  a  jackpot  graced  the  board.  There  were 
those  who  grudged  the  meal  hours.  Glowering  upon  the 
people  who  used  the  tables  for  mere  eating,  they  stood 
about  impatient  till  a  place  was  cleared  and  the  real 
business  of  poker  might  begin. 

The  same  thing  went  on  straight  through  the  ship. 
According  to  the  giant,  they  were  as  hard  at  it  in  the 
second-class  as  they  were  in  the  first,  and  on  down  as  far 
as  the  horrible  berths  went,  wherever  men  could  get  a 
board  or  a  barrel-head,  there  they  were  with  cards  in 
their  hands. 

Not  men  only.  And  not  only  the  woman  with  the 
sealskin  jacket  and  the  diamond  ear-rings  (did  she  sleep 
as  well  as  eat  and  play  in  these  adornments?)  ;  other 
women,  too,  sat  at  the  absorbing  game. 

"Are  they  really  gambling?"  Hildegarde  had  asked 
the  giant,  the  first  time  he  found  her  in  a  group  looking 
on. 

The  giant  had  laughed  and  said,  "Don't  they  look  it?" 

1 '  No.    They  are  so— so  quiet. ' ' 

"That  's  when  they  're  plunging  worst." 

"You  mean  they  're  making  large  sums  of  money 
here  now,  and  take  it  like  that  ? ' ' 

"Yes,  and  losing,  too,  and  take  it  just  the  same.  It  's 
only  in  books  that  gamblers  gurgle  and  gasp. ' ' 

But  even  the  cheerful  giant  had  seemed  to  feel  this 
was  no  place  for  Miss  Mar.  "Are  n't  you  coming  up 
stairs?"  As  she  still  lingered  fascinated,  "I  've  been 
getting  some  oranges  for  you. ' ' 


346  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"How?" 

"Out  of  a  crate  that  's  bust." 

"Your  crate?" 

"Everybody's  crate." 

Hildegarde  laughed.  He  was  so  exactly  like  a  great 
school-boy  proposing  a  raid  on  an  orchard.  "I  've  got 
oranges  of  my  own,"  she  said. 

"Yes,  but  these  are  tangerines,"  and  he  led  the  way. 

Very  few  people  up  there  in  comparison  with  the 
crowds  in  saloon  and  smoking-room.  Mrs.  Blumpitty 
asleep  under  sodden  blankets ;  a  group  of  men,  tarpaulin 
over  their  knees,  crouched  in  a  sheltered  corner  smoking 
pipes  and  talking  plans ;  a  furry  apparition  sitting  near 
the  edge  of  the  deck  on  a  bollard— Euth  Sears  in  a  long 
wolfskin  coat,  barely  out  of  reach  of  the  rain,  a  very 
solitary  little  figure  bent  over  a  book.  Hildegarde  went 
by  unsteadily,  and  as  the  ship  lurched  Ford  0 'Gorman 
caught  and  saved  her  from  falling.  He  kept  hold  of  her 
till  he  had  anchored  her  safely  aft  among  the  crates  of 
fruit. 

"I  'm  very  glad  you  did  n't,  but  how  was  it,"  said 
Hildegarde,  stripping  off  the  loose  jacket  of  a  purloined 
tangerine,  "how  was  it  you  did  n't  go  by  the  Congress, 
after  all?" 

To  her  astonishment  the  red  of  the  sunburnt  cheek 
above  her  shoulder  deepened  and  spread  all  over  0  'Gor 
man 's  face,  but  he  spoke  quite  naturally,  and  even  off 
hand.  "Oh,  I  was  afraid  I  was  n't  going  to  get  all  my 
freight  on  board  the  Congress." 

But  that  sudden  red  in  so  stalwart  a  visage  lit  a  dan 
ger  signal.  It  was  ridiculous  to  suppose,  and  yet,  was 
this  going  to  be  the  trouble  Louis  Cheviot  had  dreaded 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  347 

for  her?  She  had  up  till  then  suffered  no  check  in  the 
comfort  of  the  giant  's  cheerful  companionship ;  but  was 
she  being  too  much  with  him  ?  She  recalled  Ruth  Sears ' 
gentle  but  speculative  eyes,  raised  a  moment  from  "The 
Little  Minister,"  to  follow  the  pair  as  they  passed. 

"I  'm  going  to  talk  with  Mrs.  Blumpitty's  niece 
awhile,"  Miss  Mar  announced  suddenly.  The  giant 
stared.  ^With  a  conscious  effort  and  a  letting  down  of 
spirits,  Hildegarde  turned  from  him,  encountering  Mr. 
Matt  Gedge,  the  sharp-faced  young  man  who  had  been  in 
the  crowd  on  the  Seattle  wharf  and  had  satirized  her 
"bright  idear"  of  looking  after  her  baggage. 

"Is  0 'Gorman,"  he  began,  and  then  looking  past  her, 
"— thought  if  the  lady  was  here  you  would  n't  be  far. 
Say!"  he  arrested  Miss  Mar.  "Has  he  told  you  there  's 
robbers  aboard  this  ship  ? ' ' 

' '  Robbers  ?    No !    What  makes  you  think— ' ' 

"  There  's  a  woman  down  in  the  second  saloon— all 
she  's  got  in  the  world  's  been  swiped. ' ' 

"But  they  Ve  started  a  collection  for  her,"  said 
0  'Gorman. 

"Yep,  we  Ve  fixed  up  the  collection  and  we  Ve  fixed 
up  a  Vigilance  Committee.  Come  along,  it  was  your 
idear,  so  let  's  go  and  give  her  the  money. ' ' 

"Oh,  you  can  do  that,"  said  0 'Gorman.  "But  hold 
on  a  minute.  Maie  it  sixty-six  for  luck."  He  fished  in 
his  pocket.  "I  guess  she  's  spent  more  than  a  dollar's 
worth  of  worry." 

Hildegarde  stopped  by  the  immobile  figure  still  read 
ing.  "That  's  a  good  warm  coat  you  Ve  got,"  she  said. 

"Yes"— Ruth  looked  up  with  absent  eyes— "but  it  's 
too  long." 


348  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"  Is  it !    I  should  think  it  kept  your  ankles  good  and 


warm. ' : 


£Y-yes."  She  looked  at  the  unspeakably  filthy  deck, 
and  tucked  the  skirts  of  her  coat  tighter  round  her. 

"I  see  the  good  of  a  short  skirt  here,"  Hilde- 
garde's  eyes  followed  hers,  "and  it  looks  very  nice  on 
you,  too." 

"I  'm  glad,"  said  the  girl,  "if  you  don't  think  it  's  too 
short."  Then  she  told  Hildegarde  about  her  life  up  in 
Alaska,  how  she  had  traveled,  and  cooked,  and  nursed, 
and  hunted,  and  cured  skins,  and  followed  the  trail ;  and 
did  each  and  everything  the  better  for  wearing  a  skirt 
to  the  knee. 

"But  it  's  hard  after  we  've  worked  so,  my  aunt  and 
me,  to  see  men  looking  at  us  in  that  way  as  if  they 
thought  we  were— were,  you  know,  the  wrong  kind.  Just 
because  we  try  to  adapt  ourselves  to  the  life. 

"Some  people  might  not  understand;  but  surely  these 


men—" 


With  her  head  Ruth  Sears  made  a  little  motion  of 
negative.  Slight  as  it  was,  it  admitted  no  supposition 
of  there  being  any  doubt  about  the  matter.  "They  'd 
rather  we  all  wore  trailing  skirts  and  diamond  ear 
rings.  ' ' 

"It  's  really  rather  nice  of  them,  in  a  way,"  said  Miss 
Mar. 

But  the  one  who  had  had  the  experience  was  less  free 
to  discover  in  the  charge  a  survival  of  the  starved  spirit 
of  romance.  "That  Mr.  Tod,"  Ruth  went  on,  "he  was 
up  there  last  year.  I  Ve  cooked  him  many  a  dinner. 
Only  yesterday  I  heard  him  agreeing  with  a  lot  of  men 
that  he  would  n't  like  to  see  his  daughter  going  about  in 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  349 

such  a  short  dress,  and  all  the  while  he  was  talking  he 
was  spitting  on  the  deck. ' ' 

More  here  for  the  eye  that  could  see  than  a  base-man 
nered  churl  discussing  feminine  attire.  He,  in  his  way, 
was  dealing  with  one  of  the  important  questions  of  the 
age.  Also  he  had  on  his  side  many  a  learned  and  fas 
tidious  critic  of  society,  for  all  that  the  great  current  of 
the  future  was  set  the  other  way.  Some  inkling  of  this 
last  reached  Hildegarde,  and  it  reached  her  through  a 
dawning  sense  of  her  own  unfitness.  She  would  never  be 
in  the  vanguard  with  skirts  kilted  high  for  action.  She 
was  one  of  those  who  would  cling  to  the  outworn  modes. 
For  all  that,  she  would  for  the  rest  of  her  life  under 
stand  some  things  better  because  of  these  strange  days 
in  the  microcosm  of  the  ship. 

While  the  third  dinner  was  being  cleared  away,  Hil 
degarde  looked  into  the  music-room.  A  dilapidated 
young  woman,  at  the  dilapidated  piano,  singing  a  comic 
song,  and  the  cross-eyed  man  accompanying  on  the  flute. 
A  number  of  people  sat  about  on  the  few  rickety  chairs 
and  the  many  boxes  and  bundles,  listening  in  a  kind  of 
painful  trance,  or  passing  back  and  forth  over  the 
wooden  lattice  of  the  raised  flooring  between  which  and 
the  boards  below  escaped  bilge-water  slopped  about  with 
the  motion  of  the  ship  and  too  frequently  came  to  the 
surface. 

Mrs.  Locke  was  not  there  at  all  events.  As  Hildegarde 
turned  away  from  the  noisome-smelling  place  a  well- 
dressed  woman  of  about  forty,  who  had  been  leaning  on 
the  piano  (undisturbed,  apparently,  by  the  highly  ab 
normal  sounds  it  gave  forth),  followed  Miss  Mar  to  ask: 
"How  is  the  sick  lady  in  your  room?"  Miss  Mar  knew 


350  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

her  interlocutor  to  be  Mrs.  David  M.  Jones,  but  they 
had  not  spoken  before. 

' l  There  are  two  still  sick, ' '  Hildegarde  answered. 

1  i  I  mean  the  one  they  're  afraid  's  got  smallpox  ? ' ' 

Miss  Mar  opened  her  wide  eyes  very  wide  indeed. 
Even  Louis  had  never  thought  of  that  chance.  "I 
had  n't  heard  about  it,"  she  said.  And  presently,  "Do 
you  know  where  Mrs.  Locke  is  ? " 

"I  think  she  's  gone  to  get  the  doctor,"  answered  the 
ex-governor 's  wife.  ' '  I  had  meant  to  be  in  the  room  you 
and  she  are  in.  Pretty  satisfied  now  to  be  out  of  it." 
With  which  she  returned  to  the  festive  scene. 

Even  Hildegarde,  who  was  so  little  nervous,  would 
ordinarily  have  found  her  self-possession  shaken  by  the 
news  that  she  had  been  sleeping  for  nearly  a  week  within 
two  feet  of  so  contagious  and  foul  a  disease ;  but  she  took 
the  information  more  quietly  than  can  well  be  credited 
by  any  one  who  has  never  cut  the  ties  that  bind  us  to 
resourceful  yet  care-filled  civilized  life. 

Those  who  have  once  severed  the  thousand  threads  find 
not  only  some  hardship  and  heartsoreness,  but  certain 
natures  find,  too,  the  larger  calm  that  only  perfect  ac 
quiescence  gives.  It  is  not  all  loss  to  be  unable  to  run 
from  danger.  You  gain  a  curious  new  sense  of  the  inevit- 
ableness  that  lies  at  the  roots  of  life,  a  sense  smothered  in 
the  country  and  forgotten  in  the  town.  And  this  calm 
that  walks  the  perilous  places  of  our  earth  with  its  front 
of  untroubled  dignity  and  its  steadfast  eyes,  this  gain 
amongst  many  losses  was  not  denied  the  girl  faring  North 
for  knowledge  and  for  old  devotion's  sake. 

"Yes,"  the  steward  said,  Mrs.  Locke  was  in  her  cabin. 
As  she  went  toward  it,  Hildegarde  wondered  if  it  were 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  351 

written  among  the  things  to  be  that  she  herself  should 
die  there,  and  would  Louis  be  hearing  one  day  how 
they  'd  buried  her  in  Bering  Sea.  She  opened  the  door, 
and  there  was  the  object  of  her  quest  looking  on  at  a 
strange  and  sufficiently  horrible  spectacle.  Stretched 
full  length  upon  the  floor,  in  her  nightgown,  lay  the 
Dutch  woman  speechless,  with  a  face  swollen  and  scarlet. 
The  ship 's  doctor,  standing  astride  of  her  huge  hulk,  bent 
over  and  peering  under  the  heavy  eyelid,  which  he  had 
forced  back  with  his  thumb,  looked  into  the  rolled-up 
eye.  Hildegarde,  with  noiseless  lips,  made  the  question, 
"  Smallpox  V '  Mrs.  Locke  answered,  in  a  low  voice, 
"Smallpox!  No.  Lack  of  self-control."  How  this 
worked  out  Hildegarde  did  not  wait  to  inquire.  It  was 
too  ugly  to  see  that  big  woman  lying  there  under  such 
conditions,  and  the  place  smelt  of  alcohol. 

But  outside  it  was  hardly  better.  The  card  players 
had  gathered  like  flies  settling  down  upon  the  remains  of  a 
feast,  and  at  the  end  of  the  saloon  three  men  were  quar 
reling.  Through  an  atmosphere  thick,  horrible,  rose  the 
angry  voices.  Was  there  going  to  be  a  fight?  One 
might  face  death,  even  from  smallpox,  and  yet  not  know 
quite  how  to  accept  life  among  sights  and  sounds  like 
these. 

"What  's  the  matter?"  said  Mrs.  Locke,  catching 
Hildegarde  just  outside  their  door.  * '  You  're  not  afraid ! 
I  tell  you  it  is  n  't  smallpox. ' ' 

' '  I  know.  That  's  not  it. ' '  The  girl  leaned  against  the 
wall.  Two  of  the  angry  men  had  combined  against  the 
third.  His  chief  means  of  defense  seemed  to  be  blas 
phemy.  They  hurt  the  ears,  those  words.  She  felt  an 
inward  twist  of  humiliation  as  she  remembered  that 


352  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

Louis  had  said  rather  than  see  a  sister  of  his  go  to  Nome 
with  the  gold  rush  he  'd  see  her— 

"Then  what  is  the  matter?"  asked  the  woman  at  her 
side,  watching  her  with  an  odd  intentness.  "I  suppose 
this  is  n't  the  first  time  you  Ve  heard  a  man  swear." 

' '  The  matter  is—  I  feel  as  if  what  I  'd  seen  and  heard 
here  would  leave  some  sort  of  lasting  stain.  As  if  I  'd 
gone  through  filth  and  some  of  it  would  stick  to  me  for 
ever. ' ' 

"No,  you  don't.  You  're  only  thinking  of  what  some 
man  might  think."  Hildegarde  caught  her  breath  with 
the  surprise  of  guilty  recognition,  as  Mrs.  Locke's  soft 
voice  insisted:  "Knowing  does  n't  hurt  a  woman.  Not 
the  right  sort  of  woman.  But  it  does  change  us.  You  '11 
find  life  will  always  look  a  little  different  to  you  after 
this." 

Bella  had  said  something  like  that ! 

"It  's  curious,"  the  woman  went  on,  "how  hard  we 
struggle  to  live  up  to  men's  standard  of  our  ignorance. 
After  all,  their  instinct  about  it  is  quite  right." 

* '  Instinct  about  what  ? ' ' 

' '  That  if  we  knew  the  truth,  the  truth  would  make  us 
free." 

"The  truth  might  make  frightened  slaves  of  some  of 

us." 

' '  Only  of  the  meanest. ' ' 

"And  you  think  men  don 't  want  us  free ? ' '  Hildegarde 
asked  wearily. 

"A  very  few  may.    There  are  more  of  the  other  sort." 

"Well,  I  know  one  man,"  said  the  girl,  cleansing  con 
sciousness  with  the  vision,  "one  man  who  is  the  kind 
you  'd  say  was  an  exception.  I  'm  sure  his  not  wanting 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  353 

me  to  come  on  this  journey  was  just  a  natural  shrinking 
from  seeing  any  girl  face  hardships. ' ' 

Mrs.  Locke  set  her  fine  little  face  like  marble.  "This 
entire  ship  might  have  been  full  of  girls  facing  hard 
ships,  and  it  would  n't  have  cost  him  a  pang.  But  I  can 
well  believe  your  coming  did/7 

"Ah,  you  see,  you  don't  know  him." 

The  other  shook  her  head.  "Even  the  best  men 
have  n't  got  so  far  as  to  want  to  respect  all  women. 
Their  good-will,  their  helpfulness,  are  kept  in  water 
tight  compartments,  reserved  for  particular  women.  The 
rest  may  go  to  the  everlasting  bonfire." 

"No,  no,  no." 

"Yes,  it  seems  even  to  help  them  in  being  specially 
nice  to  some—" 

"What  helps  them?" 

"To  have  been  brutes  to  others."  Mrs.  Locke  turned 
to  go  back  into  the  horrible  little  cabin.  "The  best 
fellow  I  ever  met  told  me  that  no  man  knew  how  to  treat 
a  woman  who  had  n't  stood  over  the  grave  of  one  he  'd 
loved." 

"Well,  I  say  again,  you  don't  know  the  sort  of  man 
Why,  even  that  dreadful  Matt  Gedge-even  he  goes 
and  collects  money  for  the  poor  woman  in  the  second 
class." 

"I  never  said  they  would  n't  show  kindness  when  the 
notion  took  them.  It  's  justice  they  don't  understand." 
And  with  that  she  went  back  to  the  woman  who  was  hav 
ing  a  fit  on  the  floor. 

Up  on  deck  Hildegarde  found  a  gale  blowing.  Where 
was  the  giant?  The  chicken-merchant,  joining  Miss  Mar 
at  the  door,  held  on  to  his  slouch  hat  while  he  inquired 


354  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

significantly  after  the  health  of  the  purser.  Miss  Mar 
had  not  heard  he  was  indisposed?  "Oh,  yes,  you  ought 
to  go  and  see  him.  It  's  nothin'  catchin'— calls  it  bron 
chitis.  Reckon  it  's  heart  trouble,"  and  he  cackled  like 
the  most  elated  of  his  hens. 

Again    she    came    down-stairs,    wandering    aimlessly 
about,  and  then  stopping  by  a  little  knot  of  lookers-on 
at  the  eternal  game.     In  that  childish  mood,  that  may 
once  in  a  while  fall  upon  even  a  reasonable  girl,  she 
thought  vaguely  that  if  she  stood  long  enough  before  this 
spectacle  held  to  be  unfit  for  feminine  eyes,  the  giant 
would  certainly  come  again  and  take  her  away.     But 
the  giant  did  nothing  of  the  kind,  and  presently  she  for 
got  him.     She  usually  forgot  things  when  she  watched 
this  particular  group  of  players.    She  had  been  arrested 
just  here,  unbeknown  to  the  giant,  a  couple  of  nights 
before  on  her  way  to  bed.    In  front  of  where  Hildegarde 
stood,  Governor  Reinhart  was  giving  up  his  seat  to  an 
eagerly  waiting  claimant.    ' '  They  are  beginning  to  play 
too  high  for  me,"  his  Excellency  observed  affably  to  Miss 
Mar. 

' '  Who  is  winning  ? ' ' 

"That  woman  over  there.    She  's  a  holy  terror." 
"Not  that  one  with  the  gentle  face  and  the  pointed 
chin?" 

"Yes.  Very  pleasant  and  soft-spoken,  too.  Wife  of 
the  man  next— playing  with  the  professional  gambler 
gang.  They  don't  tackle  her.  She  's  a  corker  with  the 
cards!" 

It  was  incredible  that  he  should  be  speaking  of  that 
singularly  modest  and  well-bred-looking  woman,  who  fol 
lowed  the  game  with  eyes  that  never  lifted  but  once  all 


COME  AND  FIND  MB  355 

the  while  Hildegarde  stood  there.  It  was  when  the  last 
of  her  husband's  shrinking  pile  of  chips  was  swept  from 
him  by  the  man  opposite,  that  the  woman,  playing  her 
own  stiff  game,  not  looking  right  nor  left,  must  still  have 
been  acutely  conscious  of  the  full  extent  of  the  disaster 
at  her  side.  The  loser's  only  comment  was  "My  deal!" 
as  he  picked  up  the  cards  afresh.  Then  it  was  that  she 
turned  the  white  wedge  on  her  pointed  face,  laid  a  hand 
on  the  dealer's  arm,  and  quite  low,  "Don't  Jim!"  she 
said,  as  though  she  hoped  to  influence  him  with  her  own 
hand  full  of  cards.  Naturally,  he  paid  no  heed,  and 
each  in  the  death-like  silence,  each  went  on  with  the 
game.  There  was  something  almost  unnerving  to  the  on 
looker  in  the  strained  quiet  of  the  woman.  Was  she 
winning  or  losing  now  ?  No  hint  of  which  in  the  pointed 
white  mask,  while  she  sat  a  little  droop-shouldered,  her 
arms  lying  on  the  table  as  if  paralyzed,  moving  only  her 
long  supple  fingers,  gathering  in  or  throwing  out— unless 
she  dealt,  and  even  then  moving  about  a  tenth  as  much 
as  any  one  else  on  either  side  up  or  down  the  long  board. 
After  what  Governor  Reinhart  had  said,  each  night  on 
her  way  to  bed,  Hildegarde  had  paused  a  fascinated  in 
stant  watching  this  woman;  or  by  a  group  lower  down 
where  Curlyhead's  father  was,  often  with  his  little  boy 
on  his  knee.  While  the  elders  played,  the  five-year-old 
would  sit  quiet  as  a  mouse  staring  wisely  at  his  father's 
cards,  seeing  in  them  his  first  picture-book,  learning 
them  for  his  earliest  lesson. 

Hildegarde  had  watched  it  all  before,  but  on  this  par 
ticular  wet  evening  the  spectacle  assailed  an  unpanoplied 
spirit.  It  was  horrible.  She  would  never  get  the  picture 
out  of  her  head.  Even  when  she  should  be  at  home  again, 


356  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

doing  delightful  things  with  dear  and  happy  people, 
she  would  remember  this  and  the  light  would  go  out  of 
the  day.  For  it  would  be  going  on  still.  Somewhere, 
there  would  be  people  like  these  wasting  and  besmirch 
ing  the  flying,  irrecoverable  hours.  Women,  too,  women! 
Something  choked  in  her  throat.  She  felt  that  she  must 
strike  the  table  and  cry  out:  "Listen,  listen!  You 
have  n't  ever  heard.  Life  is  beautiful  and  good,  and 
you  Ve  never  known  that— poor,  poor  people.  But  I 
have  come  to  tell  you.  Stop  playing  with  those  pieces 
of  painted  paper  and  listen  to  my  good  news ! ' ' 

But  of  course  they  'd  only  think  she  was  mad.  Oh, 
why  had  she  come !  With  a  tension  as  of  tears,  crowd 
ing,  straining  the  muscles  of  her  throat,  she  turned 
away  to  face  again  the  wind-driven  sleet  of  the  deck. 
She  dragged  her  steps  to  the  dirty  companionway.  From 
the  smoking-room  above  came  the  giant's  great  laugh, 
punctuating  some  one's  story,  and  what  so  melancholy 
to  certain  moods  as  the  sound  of  distant  merriment !  It 
becomes  for  us  the  symbol  of  all  that  greater  gladness 
out  of  our  reach,  attainable  to  happier  men.  No  light 
as  yet,  except  in  the  saloon  behind  her.  All  the  rest  of 
the  ship  shrouded  in  the  early-gathering  shadows  of  a 
stormy  evening.  A  passion  of  loneliness  swept  over  her. 
As  her  foot  touched  the  first  step,  some  one  came  close 
behind. 

"Is  that  you?"  said  a  voice  she  did  not  recognize.  A 
touch,  a  whisky  breath  blowing  foul  in  her  face,  and 
without  lifting  her  eyes  or  even  uttering  a  sound  she  fled 
up  the  stair,  meaning  to  make  straight  for  Mrs.  Blum- 
pitty's  rain-soaked  pallet.  Half-way  up  she  saw  in  the 
gloom  above  her  the  blaze  of  a  match,  and  there  was  the 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  357 

Arctic  Cap,  his  back  turned  to  her,  holding  up  the 
lighted  match  to  read  the  run  on  the  notice  board.  As 
Hildegarde  's  eyes  fell  in  that  vivid  instant  on  the  square 
shoulders,  something  in  outline  or  attitude  set  her  heart 
to  beating  so  wildly,  that,  still  flying  on,  she  stumbled. 
With  a  little  cry  she  put  out  a  hand  and  felt  herself 
steadied  as  the  match  fell  to  darkness.  In  a  turmoil  of 
wonder  and  wild  hope  her  cheek  had  brushed  the  coat 
sleeve  one  lightning  instant  before  she  recovered  firm 
footing  and  stood  erect  with  apology  on  her  lips. 

The  ship's  doctor  and  the  purser  came  hurriedly  out 
of  the  smoking-room.  But  the  Arctic  Cap  was  turned 
away  when  the  sudden  light  streamed  out.  A  banging 
door,  hurrying  steps,  and  Hildegarde  was  peering  in  the 
dark  after  an  indistinguishable  face,  hoping  things  she 
knew  both  impossible  and  mad,  only  to  find  herself  stand 
ing  there  alone,  with  thumping  pulses. 


CHAPTER  XIX 

•HE  Arctic  Cap  had  vanished  from  the  ship. 
Every  one  else  able  to  be  afoot  appeared  on 
deck  the  next  morning  in  the  clear  and 
strangely  milder  weather.  Even  the  purser 
was  abroad,  passing  by  with  averted  eye,  re 
ceiving  haughtily  the  homage  of  the  fair  who  hastened  to 
inquire  after  his  health,  thereby  further  emphasizing 
Miss  Mar's  neglect.  She  sat  watchful  but  silent  in  the 
sunshine,  drinking  in  the  air  that  seemed  to  bring  a  bless 
ing  with  it  from  some  golden  land  that  yesterday  had 
been  far  off,  and  that  to-day  was  very  near.  Mrs.  Blum- 
pitty  had  resumed  the  perpendicular  and  her  most  cheer 
ful  air.  All  the  Blumpitty  ' '  outfit ' '  in  the  best  of  spirits. 
The  business  woman  to  the  company  was  exhibiting  her 
vaunted  competency  in  "dealing  with  men"  and  "af 
fairs"  by  industrious  prosecution  of  her  flirtation  with 
the  oldest  dentist.  Shifting  groups  of  lawyers, ' '  judges, ' ' 
senators,  were  cheerfully  objurgating  the  mining  laws. 
The  lean  bean-feaster,  who  between  meals  was  for  ever 
chewing  gum,  paused  in  his  nervous  pacing  of  the  deck, 
though  not  in  his  labor  of  mastication,  to  assure  ex- 
Governor  Reinhart  that  he  was  "dead  wrong."  This 
seemed,  on  the  face  of  it,  improbable.  But  Reinhart 
condescended  to  remind  him,  '  *  Nome  is  n  't  like  any  other 
camp.  Wait  till  you  see  the  state  of  things  there." 

358 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  359 


"Have." 
"Been  there?" 


The  bean-feaster  had  an  audience  before  you  could 
wink,  for  he  had  nodded,  chewing  harder  than  ever.  Then 
a  pause  long  enough  for  him  to  say  modestly,  "I  'm  the 
man  appointed  by  the  Nome  miners  to  go  in  the  commis 
sion  to  Washington  and  report." 

"Why  did  n't  you  go?" 

' '  Did.  Coming  back  now. ' '  With  immense  respect  all 
within  earshot  listened  to  the  disquisition  on  Alaskan 
mining  laws,  and  the  bean-feaster 's  modest  assurance 
that  through  his  exertions  they  were  being  amended. 

Some  one  aft  in  the  steerage  was  playing  the  fiddle, 
and  a  couple  of  darkies  were  dancing.  The  older  woman 
is  Mrs.  L 'Estrange 's  cook,  and  Mrs.  L 'Estrange  is  the 
Southern  lady  of  fallen  fortunes  who  is  going,  with  a 
store  of  fine  damask  and  all  her  family  silver,  to  open  a 
high-class  boarding-house  at  Nome!  She  had  read  of 
Mrs.  Millicent  Egerton  Finney,  who,  in  the  Klondike,  by 
this  means,  had  made  a  ' '  pile. ' ' 

Mrs.  Locke's  admirer,  Mr.  Meyer,  was  displaying  a 
small  working  model  of  a  superfine  contrivance,  only  to 
discover  that  every  man  on  the  ship  had  a  superfine 
contrivance  of  his  own  which  was  the  grandest  thing 
on  earth  in  the  way  of  gold-saving.  Many  of  the  people, 
as  they  moved  from  group  to  group,  greeted  Mrs.  Locke 
and  Miss  Mar;  but  to  Hildegarde's  intent  eye  all  other 
faces  were  just  merely  not  the  one  under  the  arctic  cap. 

Her  companion  watched  the  whale  birds  that  swarmed 
so  low  this  morning  over  the  water.  Every  now  and 
then  a  fountain  spouted  up  into  the  sunshine. 

But  when  Hildegarde,  distracting  herself  an  instant 


360  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

from  her  own  watch,  said,  "Do  you  suppose  it  's  true 
those  birds  feed  off  barnacles  on  the  whale's  back?"— 
Mrs.  Locke's  little  concern  for  what  she  stared  at  was 
evident  in  her  answering,  "There  's  one  thing  I  don't 
understand. ' ? 

"What  'sthat?" 

"You  don't  seem  to  have  much  to  say  to  your  friend, 
the  purser." 

"My  friend?" 

"Yes." 

"He  is  n't  my  friend." 

"Oh." 

"What  made  you  think—" 

"Merely  that  he  seemed  to  be  when  you  came  on 
board." 

' '  You  mean  because  he  let  me  get  into  my  room  before 
the  crowd  came  ? ' ' 

"Well,  that  was  real  friendliness,  but  it  was  n't  what 
I  meant. ' ' 

' '  What  did  you  mean  ? ' ' 

' '  Oh,  I  only  thought,  since  you  called  him  by  his  Chris 
tian  name,  he  might  be  a  friend."  The  tone  conveyed 
the  widest  latitude— the  most  varied  experience  of  other 
women's  vagaries,  or  their  weakness. 

"I  called  him  by  his  Christian  name!"  ejaculated 
Hildegarde. 

"Yes." 

"When  in  the  world?" 

"That  very  first  night." 

' '  You  must  be  dreaming. ' ' 

Mrs.  Locke  shook  her  head.  "Of  course  it  's  no  crime. 
I  did  n  *t  mean  that. ' ' 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  361 

" Crime?  No.  It  would  have  been  lunacy.  But  I 
never  did  it." 

Mrs.  Locke  opened  a  little  book  that  lay  in  her  lap. 

Hildegarde  leaned  forward.  For  the  first  moment 
since  waking  she  forgot  the  Arctic  Cap.  "Do  help  me  to 
understand.  What  did  I  say?" 

Mrs.  Locke's  clear  brown  eyes  looked  into  the  earnest 
face  of  the  girl,  and  then  a  little  unwillingly,  "It  was  n't 
in  the  least  my  business,"  she  added. 

"What  did  you  think  you  heard?" 

"Did  n't  the  purser  come  to  the  door  asking  if  Miss 
Mar  was  'all  right'?  And  did  n't  you  call  out,  'Is  that 
you,  Louis  ? '  and  did  n  't  you  run  after  him  ? "  As  Hilde 
garde 's  perplexed  face  yielded  to  a  gleam  of  horrified 
enlightenment,  "Of  course  it  was  n't  any  business  of 
mine,"  Mrs.  Locke  repeated,  and  looked  intently  at  the 
sea-birds  flocking  in  a  new  place. 

"Do  you— do  you  mean  you  think  his  name  is — " 

"I  don't  thinko  I  know  his  name  is  Louis  Napoleon 
Brown." 

Hildegarde  gasped  out,  "Then  that  was  why!" 

"Why-" 

"Why  he  was  so— surprising.  His  name  daring  to  be 
Louis!  The  purser!  Oh,  dear.  Oh,  dear,"  and  the  girl 
began  suddenly  to  laugh,  and  grew  more  and  more  con 
vulsed  the  longer  she  thought  about  it,  till  she  became 
hysterical.  Mrs.  Locke  looked  gravely  at  her,  even 
frowning  slightly. 

"Oh,dear.  Oh,dear.  He  thought  I  meant  him.  Oh!  oh!" 

"You  did  n't?" 

' '  And  you  think  you  know  the  world.  You  called  me 
an  infant." 


362  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"Well,  I  own  I  never  could  make  it  square  with  the 
rest  of  you. ' ' 

* '  Oh,  I  must  make  you  understand.  You  see  I  was  ex 
pecting  a  great  friend  of  mine— an  old  friend  of  all  our 
family  was  coming  to  see  me  off ;  at  least,  I  hoped  he  was. 
When  I  heard  that  somebody  was  asking  for  me,  I  was 
sure  it  was—"  Up  and  down  the  deck  her  eye  went 
roving.  She  lowered  her  voice— "a  man  called  Louis 
Cheviot."  And  she  told  Mrs.  Locke  what  he  was  like, 
this  old  friend.  ' '  You  see  the  reason  I  jumped  so  quickly 
to  the  conclusion  he  was  asking  for  me,  is  that  he  never 
before  failed  me.  He  's  been  a  quite  uncommon  sort  of 
friend.  He  's  the  man  I  Ve  once  or  twice  mentioned." 
(Mrs.  Locke  kept  her  lips  from  smiling,  "once  or 
twice!")  " Though  I  never  said  what  his  name  was.  I 
told  you  about  his  hunting  up  my  father  and  staying 
with  him  all  those  months;  about  his  coming  out  with 
dogs  over  the  ice,  just  to  bring  us  word;  and  that  kind 
of  thing.  He  's  a  very  particular  friend  of  all  of  us. 
And  then  he  's  the  most  wonderful  company.  He  makes 
you  always  see  the  fun  of  things.  And  you—  Yes,  life 
is  always  more  interesting,  somehow,  when  he  's  there. 
Did  you  ever  know  anybody  like  that  ? ' ' 

"He  did  n't,  after  all,  come  to  see  you  off.  Yes,  I  Ve 
known  some  one  like  that. ' ' 

Hildegarde  turned  her  head  suddenly.  Up  the  deck 
and  down  the  deck  the  wide  eyes  vainly  traveled.  How 
had  it  come  that  she  had  felt  so  sure  ?  What  had  she  to 
go  on?  A  likeness  in  the  shoulder  outline.  Something 
the  same  trick  in  the  carriage  of  the  head.  A  pang 
shot  through  her.  "Yes,"  she  said,  as  though  agreeing 
that  he  had  failed  her,  "I  Ve  often  said  to  myself,  'To 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  363 

think  of  his  never  even  saying  good-by. '  :  (Yet  she  had 
been  imagining—  A  dullness  fell  upon  her  that  was 
worse  than  acute  disappointment.)  "He  was  angry," 
she  went  on.  "We  had  quarreled,  because  I  would  go 
to  Nome." 

"He  was  right  and  you  were  wrong,"  said  Mrs.  Locke. 

Hildegarde  smiled.  She  rather  liked  this  woman  for 
veering  round  and  taking  his  part.  "Well,  all  the  same, 
I  thought  it  was  n  't  very  nice  of  him  not  to  send  me  any 
sign  of  forgiveness  at  the  last.  And  the  odd  thing  is" 
(her  spirits  revived  a  little  in  the  act  of  talking  about 
this  old  friend)  "it  was  so  unlike  Louis  Cheviot.  He  can 
be  rather  severe,  but  he  never  sulks.  He  's  the  kind  of 
person"  (Hildegarde  had  no  idea  how  often  she  had  said 
"he  is  the  kind  of  person"),  "the  kind  that  always  looks 
after  his  friends.  And  no  matter  how  badly  they  treat 
him  he  goes  on  looking  after  them.  He  was  like  that 
even  when  he  was  little.  His  sister  once  told  me  a  thing 
about  him  that  just  shows  you  what  kind  of—  He  was 
seven  years  old,  Barbara  said,  and  the  most  fiery  little 
patriot  you  ever  heard  of.  And  in  other  ways,  yes,  I  've 
often  thought  there  could  never  have  been  a  little  boy 
so  like  the  grown  man  as  this  child  was  like  the  Louis 
Cheviot  I  know."  She  said  it  with  an  air  of  one  mak 
ing  an  effective  point. 

"Is  that  so?"  said  Mrs.  Locke,  telling  herself  she 
had  n't  realized  how  handsome  the  girl  was  until  this 
morning. 

' '  Just  to  give  you  an  idea.  He  had  a  perfect  passion, 
his  sister  says,  for  making  a  noise.  Yes,  but  more  than 
any  boy  she  ever  knew.  You  had  only  to  say  fire-crack 
ers  to  make  Louis  explode  with  enthusiasm.  The  only 


364  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

reason  he  wanted  to  grow  up  was  so  that  he  could  get  a 
gun,  and  he  'd  rather  let  off  torpedoes  than  eat  pie.  No 
picnic  or  birthday  or  holiday  of  any  sort  was  the  real 
thing  unless  he  could  make  a  fearful  rumpus.  And  the 
day  he  lived  for  the  year  round  was  the  Fourth  of  July. 
Yes,  yes,  I  know  most  American  boys  are  like  that,  only 
Louis  was  more  so  than  any  boy  you  ever  heard  of.  So 
his  sister  says.  Well,  I  forgot  to  tell  you  when  he  was 
two  his  father  died  awfully  in  debt.  For  years  the  Che 
viots  were  so  poor  they  did  n't  always  have  enough 
bread.  So  they  were  naturally  pretty  short  of  fire 
crackers.  And  for  those  early  years  poor  little  Louis 
had  to  get  his  fun  out  of  other  boys'  noise." 

"Ah,  the  thing  is  to  make  it  yourself."  Mrs.  Locke 
spoke  with  the  accent  of  one  who  makes  the  wider  appli 
cation. 

"Of  course."  Hildegarde  nipped  the  generalization 
in  the  bud.  ' '  Well,  he  learned  very  early  that  if  he  was 
to  have  even  a  little  Fourth  of  July  he  had  to  save  up  for 
it.  And  he  did.  When  he  got  a  nickel  or  two  he 
would  n't  waste  it  on  candy,  and  he  did  n't  even  buy 
chewing-gum.  Just  saved  up  for  July.  The  year  he  was 
seven  his  mother  had  to  give  up  trying  to  live  in  part  of 
their  nice  big  house.  They  moved  into  a  very  small  cot 
tage  on  the  other  side  of  the  garden.  But  Louis  and  his 
cousins,  and  the  rest  of  the  little  boys  of  the  neighbor 
hood,  were  going  to  have  the  greatest  and  most  glorious 
Fourth  they  'd  any  of  them  ever  known.  The  others  had 
toy  pistols  and  rockets  and  little  cannon.  Louis  had 
saved  up  and  had  got  some  fire-crackers  and  two  little 
flags,  and  he  was  going  to  make  things  hum.  Well,  there 
was  a  man  who  had  just  moved  into  the  Cheviots'  big 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  365 

house  and  nobody  liked  him,  but  I  expect  they  would  n't 
have  liked  anybody  who  lived  in  that  house  without  be 
ing  a  Cheviot.     And  he  had  a  little  boy  about  Louis's 
age.     And  the  little  boy  was  very  ill.     Scarlet  fever. 
Well,  on  the  evening  of  the  third  (you  know  they  never 
can  wait  till  the  Fourth),  the  boys  all  over  town  began 
to  celebrate,  but  they  were  going  to  celebrate  most  just 
in  front  of  Louis's  house,  for  that  was  where  the  great 
fight  was  to  be— the  battle,  you  know,  where  they  were 
going  to  beat  the  British  all  over  again.    It  was  always 
more  fun,  and  lots  more  noise  and  slaughter  if  Louis 
was  one  of  the  generals.     So  they  came  trooping  down 
the  street  after  supper,  letting  off  torpedoes  by  the  way. 
And  when  Louis  heard  them  he  tore  out  with  his  flags 
and  his  crackers,  wild  with  excitement.     And  he  lined 
the  boys  up  and  told  them  where  the  red-coats  were  in 
ambush  behind  the  wood  house.     Louis  had  lit  some 
punk,  and  the  new  neighbor  came  rushing  out  just  as  a 
big  cracker  went  off  with  a  bang.    Barbara  Cheviot  was 
on  her  side  of  the  laurel  and  she  saw  the  man  throw  up 
his  hands  as  though  he  'd  been  shot,  and  then  make  for 
Louis  exactly  as  if  he  meant  to  strike  him.    Barbara  was 
scared  for  a  moment.    But  by  the  time  the  new  neighbor 
got  to  where  the  boys  were  he  was  holding  himself  down 
pretty  well.    Barbara  heard  him  speaking  quite  kindly. 
What  were  they  going  to  do,  and  that  kind  of  thing. 
And  when  they  told  him,  Barbara  says  a  sound  like  a 
little  groan  came  out  of  his  tight  lips,  and  he  looked  up 
at  the  window  where  the  curtains  were  drawn.    But  he 
asked  the  boys  how  many  more  crackers  they  had.    And 
when  he  saw  what  a  lot  there  were,  he  only  said  that  was 
fine  to  have  so  many.    When  he  was  a  little  boy  he  had 


366  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

to  share  one  pack  with  three  brothers.  And  he  said  he 
hoped  they  knew  what  the  Fourth  of  July  meant  and 
why  they  had  a  right  to  be  proud  and  make  a  noise. 
Louis  answered  up  and  told  him.  The  man  said  'Good, 
good!'  He  did  n't  want  to  put  a  stop  to  the  fun,  he 
said.  He  was  only  thinking  about  the  little  boy  up  in 
that  room  there,  who  was  n  't  having  any  Fourth  of  July 
at  all  this  year.  He  was  ill.  So  ill  he  might  never  see 
another  July.  Yes,  he  was  probably  dying,  and  Barbara 
says,  he  could  n't  go  on  for  a  minute.  He  had  to  wait. 
And  all  the  little  boys  looked  down  at  the  ground. 
'There  's  just  a  chance,  I  think,'  the  father  said,  'if  he 
sleeps  to-night,  just  a  little  chance— if  you  boys  would 
celebrate  on  the  other  side  of  the  town.  And  I  'd  be 
very  much  obliged  to  you, '  he  said.  As  he  was  going  off 
he  turned  to  Louis  and  asked  him  if  he  'd  tell  all  the 
boys  he  saw,  and  try  to  keep  them  from  coming  into 
this  street.  Louis  said,  Yes,  he  would,  and  the  man 
went  back  to  his  child.  But  he  did  n't  go  to  bed— just 
sat  in  the  sick-room  and  watched.  The  oddest  thing 
about  that  third  of  July  was  that  Mrs.  Cheviot  and  the 
girls  slept  the  whole  night  through.  It  was  the  only  year 
of  their  lives  that  ever  happened.  There  was  n't  a 
sound  in  their  street.  But  the  man  in  the  big  house  was 
too  anxious  and  miserable  about  the  sick  child  to  notice 
or  remember  anything  outside  that  room  where  they 
were  all  watching.  Just  before  -sunrise  the  crisis  was 
passed,  and  the  doctor,  who  'd  been  sent  a  long  way  for, 
and  had  been  watching,  too,  said  the  fever  had  gone 
down  and  the  boy  was  saved.  The  father  came  out  for 
a  breath  of  air.  In  the  grayness  he  saw  something  mov 
ing  down  by  the  fence.  'Who  's  that?'  he  called  out, 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  367 

and  when  he  got  close  up  he  saw  a  little  figure  patroling 
the  dim  street.  'Why,  are  n't  you  the  boy—'  he  began 
to  say.  'Yes/  Louis  told  him,  'I  'm  doin'  what  I  said/ 
'  What  you  said  ? '  The  man  did  n  't  remember  even  then. 
'Yes,'  Louis  said,  'I  'm  bein'  a  sort  o'  watchman  to  see 
the  boys  don't  make  a  noise  just  here.'  And  he  had  a 
bunch  of  fire-crackers  in  his  hand  and  two  little  flags  in 
his  hat." 

With  suffused  eyes  the  girl  looked  out  across  the  shin 
ing  water.  The  old  story  had  a  new  significance  for  her, 
if  none  at  all  for  Mrs.  Locke. 

"It  was,  as  I  began  by  saying,  more  exactly  like  the 
Louis  Cheviot  I  know  than  a  whole  book  of  biography 
might  be.  It  's  because  he  's  precisely  like  that  to  this 
day  that  I  was  so  surprised  when  he  let  me  go  off  with 
out  a  word,  because,  you  see,  he  'd  been  'sort  o'  watch 
man  '  for  us,  too.  It  's  easier  to  believe  that  nothing  else 
will  do  for  him  but  just  to  see  you  through. ' '  She  turned 
her  head,  and  her  grasp  on  the  railing  tightened— noth 
ing  else  had  done !  For  that  figure  outlined  against  the 
sky— no  use  any  longer  that  he  turns  his  collar  up  above 
his  ears,  no  efficient  mask  any  more  the  arctic  cap.  That 
was  the  "watchman"  yonder  on  the  bridge,  standing 
guard  over  the  fortunes  of  Hildegarde  Mar ! 

' '  What  's  the  matter  ?    What  is  it  ? "  asked  Mrs.  Locke. 

"Only— only  that  the  most  wonderful  thing  that  ever 
happened  is  happening  right  now. ' ' 

"What  's  happening?" 

"The  man  I  've  been  telling  you  about— he  's  there!" 

"Not  that  one  on  the  bridge!" 

' '  Hush.     'Sh.    Don 't  stir.    I  must  be  very  quiet. ' ' 

"Because  you  are  n't  sure?" 


368  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"Because  I  am.    Oh-h— " 

Mrs.  Locke  looked  steadily  into  Hildegarde's  face  for 
an  instant,  before  she  turned  away. 

The  girl  leaned  forward.  "No,  no.  It  's  not  that," 
she  said,  and  from  under  the  brim  of  her  hat  she  sent 
another  glance  to  the  figure  against  the  sky.  "He  's 
made  a  lot  of  money  in  the  North— he  has  all  kinds  of 
business  interests  up  here." 

*  *  How  long  have  you  known  he  was  on  board  ? ' ' 

"I  almost  think  that  in  the  back  of  my  head  I  sus 
pected  before,  but  I  did  n't  know  till  last  night.  And  I 
was  n't  sure  till  this  minute,"  she  added,  with  girl's 
logic. 

"You  have  n't  spoken  at  all— you  two?" 

Hildegarde  shook  her  head. 

' '  Why  do  you  think  he  wants  to  spy  on  you  ? ' ' 

"Oh,  Louis  does  n't  want  to  spy."  Her  tone  con 
victed  the  suggestion  of  rank  absurdity.  "I  told  you 
he  's  been  dreadfully  angry.  Too  angry  to  write.  Per 
haps  too  angry  to  speak."  Was  that  it?  Again  the  up 
ward  glance.  "But"— she  clutched  at  the  inalienable 
comfort— "it  's  Louis  Cheviot." 

"Well,  don't  be  too  certain  this  time,  that  's  all." 

Not  be  certain?  But  that  was  just  what  she  must  be. 
Another  quick  look,  and  lo!  the  bridge  was  empty. 
"I  'm  quite,  quite  sure— but  I— I  '11  just  go  and  see." 

He  was  standing  near  the  door  of  the  chart-room.  As 
Hildegarde's  head  came  up  the  figure  vanished.  When 
she  reached  the  threshold  there  it  was,  back  turned  to  the 
door,  cap  bent  over  a  map.  Incredible  to  her  now  that 
she  had  n't  known  him  all  along;  but,  nevertheless,  she 
stood  wavering,  seized  by  something  else  than  mere  ex- 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  369 

citement— a  wholly  unexpected  shyness.  Was  he  indeed 
nursing  that  old  anger  against  her  ?  Was  it  conceivable 
he  wanted  to  avoid  her  the  whole  voyage?  Sfye  half 
turned  back,  telling  herself  that  at  all  events  something 
was  the  matter  with  her  tongue— it  was  a  physical  im 
possibility  for  her  to  speak.  Then  the  next  thing  was,  she 
heard  her  own  voice  saying  quite  steadily,  with  even  a 
faint  ring  of  defiance,  "  It's  no  use!  I  Ve  found  you  out !" 
The  figure  flashed  about,  and  Hildegarde  caught  the 
shine  in  the  black-fringed  eyes  as  he  pulled  off  the  cap, 
leaving  his  hair  ruffled.  He  held  out  his  hand,  laughing, 
but,  as  it  would  almost  seem,  a  little  shamefaced.' 
''Well,  it  took  you  long  enough." 

"No  wonder!"     She  felt  an  imperative  need  to  pre 
vent  her  gladness  from  appearing  excessive.    "You  can't 
ever  say  again  there  's  nothing  of  the  actor  in  you." 
"Why  can't  I?" 

"After  masquerading  all  these  days?" 
"I  did  n't  mean  to  masquerade." 
"Why  did  you  go  about  in  that  horrid  cap  then,  and 
never  speak  to  me,  or—" 

"Oh,  I  never  meant  to  stay  incog.  I  was  only  wait 
ing-" 

"What  for?" 

"My  opportunity;  and  it  never  came." 
' '  What  opportunity  ? ' ' 

c< Well' '-he  leaned  against  the  lintel,  and  he  was 
smiling  in  that  old  whimsical  way  of  his— "I  suppose 
what  I  was  waiting  for  was  your  getting  into  some  sort 
of  scrape." 

"You  were  hoping  for  that !"  but  while  she  denounced 
him,  she,  too,  was  smiling. 


370  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"Well,  I  had  prophesied  it.  I  suppose  a  prophet  usu 
ally  has  a  weakness  for  seeing  his  wisdom  verified. ' ' 

She  laughed  out  as  light-heartedly  as  though  the  jour 
ney  had  been  without  care  or  cloud.  "And  you  did  n't 
like  your  prophecy  not  to  come  true.  Poor  false  prophet ! 
No  wonder  you  hid  your  face. ' ' 

"Yes,  as  for  pretending— no,  it  is  n't  any  earthly  use. 
The  truth  is,  I  expected  that  very  first  evening  to  step 
in  at  some  psychological  moment." 

"Save-my-life  sort  of  thing?" 

"Well,  save  you  some  anxiety  or  discomfort  at  the 
least.  But  you  were  the  one  passenger  on  the  ship  who 
did  n  't  suffer  the  one  or  the  other. ' ' 

(Ah,  he  did  n't  know!  And  she  was  n't  going  to  tell 
him.  Oh,  dear,  no!) 

"I  go  to  see  about  your  baggage.  It  's  checked,  and 
on  the  ship.  I  curry  favor  with  the  captain,  so  as  to  get 
you  a  seat  at  the  first  table.  You  Ve  got  one  for  your 
self." 

"No.    /didn't." 

"Well,  whoever  got  it,  you  sit  in  it.  Same  thing  on 
deck.  While  I  'm  looking  for  a  sheltered  place  for  your 
chair  you  are  established.  I  bring  special  provisions  to 
keep  you  from  starvation.  You  are  somehow  as  well 
supplied  and  with  as  exactly  the  right  things  as  though 
you  'd  made  the  trip  twenty  times. ' ' 

"It  was  the  Blumpittys,"  Hildegarde  began. 

1 '  The  whattatys  ?  Never  mind.  Call  it  any  name  you 
like.  I  could  n 't  have  promised  you  new-laid  eggs  every 
morning  for  breakfast  a  thousand  miles  from  land.  I 
could  only  hang  about  ready  to  save  you  from  unpleas 
antness.  But,  God  bless  me,  unpleasantness  never  comes 
within  a  league  of  you. ' ' 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  371 

"The  purser,"  Hildegarde  prompted,  with  a  gleam  of 
eye. 

But  he  tossed  the  suggestion  aside  with,  "A  little 
over  pleasantness  that  you  're  able  to  check  for  your 
self." 

"It  's  plain  I  'm  not  the  stuff  romantic  heroines  are 
made  of. ' ' 

He  did  n't  contradict  that.  "You  certainly  have  n't 
given  me  much  excuse  for  coming  along. ' ' 

She  was  glad  he  was  n't  looking  her  way  at  that  mo 
ment.  It  was  like  him  to  declare  his  mission  so  simply, 
and  yet  he  stood  there  in  the  sunshine,  smiling  philo 
sophically,  as  he  turned  down  his  collar,  saying,  "The 
merest  superfluity.  That  's  what  I  am.  Except,"  he 
added  more  seriously,  "that  if  I  had  n't  come  I  should 
never  have  believed  I  was  so  little  needed.  So  it  turns 
out  that  what  I  Ve  come  for  is  my  own  enlightenment." 

"Not  only  your  enlightenment,"  and  her  eyes  invited 
him  to  understanding  of  a  friend's  gratefulness  to  a 
friend.  But  he  lifted  his  bare  head  to  the  breeze  that 
swept  in  with  the  sunshine  at  the  open  door,  as  though, 
having  delivered  himself  of  his  grievance,  he  could  think 
of  nothing  now  but  the  comfort  of  being  free  of  that  all- 
enveloping  cap.  His  eyes  seemed  to  shine  only  for  joy 
in  the  sun,  as  he  stood  there  ruffling  still  more  his  short, 
wavy  hair— the  hair  that  did,  as  Bella  said,  "fit"  him  so 
uncommonly  well.  And  he  certainly  looked  as  little  sen 
timental  as  some  sturdy  mountain  pine. 

"Some  people,"  Hildegarde  remarked  in  a  detached 
tone,  "would  think  it  was  a  waste  for  two  old  friends— 
we  might  have  had  all  these  days  together. ' ' 

"Yes.  I  give  you  my  word  I  never  meant—"  He 
seemed  to  intend  an  apology  as  though  he  assumed  the 


372  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

deprivation  to  be  chiefly,  if  not  solely,  hers.  ' '  The  very 
first  time  I  passed  you  I  thought,  of  course,  you  'd  find 
me  out.  Then,  as  you  did  n't.  I  kept  putting  off- 
Morning,  Captain." 

"Morning!" 

1 '  I  should  think  you  did  keep  putting  off ! " 

"I  did  n't  want  you  to"— he  lowered  his  voice— "I 
did  n't  want  to  take  you  by  surprise  before  people." 

"You  thought  the  joy  might  be  too  much  for  me?" 
she  demanded. 

Cheviot  looked  at  her  with  the  swift  speculation  in  his 
eye  of  the  man  who  is  thinking:  "Now,  is  she  going  to 
insist  on  quarreling  with  me  1 "  "  This  is  the  lady  I  was 
talking  to  you  about,  Captain.  Pretty  cool  of  me  having 
her  up  here  without  asking  you!  Miss  Mar— Captain 
Gillies.  Now,  the  least  I  can  do  is  to  take  her  down," 
and,  in  spite  of  the  captain's  gruff  civility,  that  was 
what  Cheviot  proceeded  to  do.  "Don  Quixote's  signal 
ing.  Let  's  go  and  see  what  's  up." 

Hildegarde  had  not  perceived  that  the  gaunt  old  per 
son  below  was  making  any  unusual  demonstration.  He 
was  always  waving  his  arms  and  addressing  the  multi 
tude.  "I  've  been  rather  afraid  of  that  one,"  she  con 
fided. 

"Afraid?  Then  it  's  only  because  you  don't  know 
him.  He  's  the  most  interesting  person  on  the  ship. ' ' 

"No,  my  Blumpitty  's  the  most  interesting." 

"Well,  you  show,  me  your  blumpitty  and  I  '11  show 
you  mine.  Mine  's  got  an  invention  for  pumping  water 
for  the  placers." 

"Mine  's  got  something  far  more  wonderful." 

4  *  Don't  believe  you.     Wait  till  you  know  about  Don 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  373 

Quixote  's  'systems  of  windmills';  they  're  the  greatest 
ever.  I  don 't  say  his  windmills  will  work  at  the  mines ; 
but  they  've  gone  without  a  let-up,  straight  through  the 
North  Pacific  and  the  Bering  Sea.  Windmills  all  the 
morning.  Windmills  every  night.  You  must  have  heard 
as  you  passed  him  on  the  deck,  'Windmills,"  Windmills.' 
No?  Well,  come  along." 

Rather  nice  to  be  "coming  along"  with  Louis  once 
more.  It  was  going  to  make  a  difference  in  this  expedi 
tion. 

Hildegarde  got  a  compliment  to  her  seamanship  out  of 
the  fantastic  old  Alabaman.  "I  Ve  watched  this  young 
lady,"  he  informed  Cheviot.  "She  's  as  happy  in  a 
*  norther'  as  one  o'  my  windmills."  And  he  sent  a  rat 
tling  laugh  after  them  as  they  two  went  down  the 
swinging  deck. 

"How  different  everybody  looks  to-day— it  's  the  sun 
shine.  ' ' 

"Yes,  I  think  they  do  look  different."  But  he  did 
not  say  it  was  the  sunshine. 

"I  don't  see  my  Blumpitty,  nor,  what  's  more  im 
portant,  Mrs.  Locke." 

"That  's  the  woman  you  're  so  much  with?" 

"Yes.  It  looks  as  if  she  'd  gone  below."  What  did  it 
matter?  Nothing  mattered  now.  Miss  Mar  had  a  dis 
tinct  sense  of  repressing  a  quite  foolish  sense  of  radiant 
content,  not  to  say  elation.  How  this  having  a  friend 
along  lit  up  the  rude  and  sordid  ship!  Not  the  first 
time  this  particular  friend  had  wrought  this  particular 
miracle  in  her  sight.  The  fact  that  Louis's  eyes  rested 
on  things  constrained  them  to  reveal  an  "interesting- 
ness"  unsuspected  before. 


374  '      COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"There  are  my  three  financiers,"  she  whispered. 
"They  are  n't  as  splendid  as  your  Don  Quixote,  but 
they  're  very  nice  to  me  at  table. ' ' 

"I  'm  relieved  to  hear  you  've  found  some  one  who 
contrives  to  be  'nice'  there.  I  've  wondered  how  you 
were  getting  on,"  he  chuckled. 

The  temptation  to  confess  was  strong  upon  her.  But 
no.  Even  Louis  would  be  obliged  to  say,  "I  told  you 
so." 

"At  first,"  she  said,  with  the  detached  air  of  the  in 
vestigator,  * '  I  watched  my  neighbors,  because  everything 
they  did  was  so  surprising.  But  by  and  by  I  got  so  I 
could  see  nice  distinctions  and  fine  shades.  Some  of  the 
roughest-looking  have  n't  by  any  means  the  roughest 
manners. ' ' 

' '  Oh,  you  've  discovered  that,  have  you  ? ' ' 

"Yes.  This  man  here"— it  was  necessary  to  draw 
close  and  to  whisper  again— "he  's  Mr.  Simeon  Peters, 
from  Idaho.  He  shouted  across  the  table  to  me  at  dinner 
yesterday  to  pass  the  butter.  He  was  just  plunging  his 
own  knife  into  it  as  everybody  at  our  table  does." 

"As  everybody  at  every  table  does,"  Cheviot  cor 
rected. 

"Well,  but  wait.  You  don't  know  how  elegant  we  are 
down  at  our  end.  Mr.  Sim  Peters  hesitated,  and  you 
could  see  a  misgiving  dawning  behind  his  spectacles. 
He  drew  back  just  before  he  reached  the  butter-dish,  and 
carefully  and  very  thoroughly  he  licked  his  knife  the 
whole  length  of  the  blade.  Yes!  Then  he  felt  quite 
happy  about  plunging  it  in  the  public  butter."  She  was 
able  to  laugh  now  at  what  had  driven  her  from  the  table 
in  that  dark  yesterday.  Louis  laughed,  too;  he  even 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  375 

carried  his  genial  good-will  the  excessive  length  of  join 
ing  in  the  conversation  of  those  same  financiers. 

''Did  you  succeed  in  getting  your  plant  on  board?" 
he  asked  the  nearest  of  the  trio. 

"Yes.  But  we  had  to  pay  another  fellow  to  take  off 
half  his  stuff  to  make  room  for  ours,"  said  financier 
number  two. 

"What  process  have  you  got?" 

"Oh,  the  McKeown,"  said  number  three. 

' l  And  it  's  the  greatest  ever  1 ' ' 

"That  's  right,"  said  all  three  together. 

But  why,  Hildegarde  wondered,  why  did  he  talk  to 
financiers,  when  he  might  talk  to  her  ? 

"Them  innercents  think  that  about  the  McKeown," 
said  a  grizzled  man  across  Cheviot's  shoulder,  "only 
jest  becuz  they  ain  't  never  seen  the  Dingley  workin '. ' ' 

"You  got  the  Dingley?"  Cheviot  asked ;  just  as  though 
it  mattered. 

"No  good  goin' to  Nome  'nlessy'  have  got  the  Dingley." 
And  while  Cheviot  lingered  to  hear  just  why  it  was  the 
Dingley  could ' '  lick  creation, ' '  Hildegarde  leaned  against 
the  stanchion,  watering  him  with  that  interest  the  better- 
born  American  woman  commonly  feels  in  seeing  some 
thing  of  what  she  has  less  opportunity  for  than  any 
member  of  her  sex  in  Europe,  viz.,  the  way  her  men  folk 
bear  themselves  with  men.  She  had  the  sense  that 
again  the  American  enjoys  in  its  quiddity,  of  making 
acquaintance  with  a  new  creature,  while  observing  her 
old  friend  in  this  new  light.  Cheviot  was  not  only  at  his 
ease  with  these  people,  he  put  them  at  ease  with  him. 
They  were  content  to  reveal  themselves,  even  eager  before 
the  task.  Was  it  because  he  looked  ' '  a  likely  customer, ' ' 


376  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

or  did  men  commonly  turn  to  him?  Now  Mr.  Isaiah 
Joslin  and  his  sour-dough  friend  were  pushing  in  be 
tween  Hildegarde  and  the  group  where  Cheviot  had  been 
buttonholed.  Joslin  was  scoffing  at  the  Dingley  as  well 
as  the  McKeown.  "Yes,  sir!"— he  demanded  Cheviot's 
attention  by  striking  his  fist  in  his  palm  under  that  gen 
tleman's  nose— "I  11  do  more  with  a  plain  rocker  that 
any  feller  can  make  for  himself  out  of  a  store  box  and 
three  sticks,  than  all  these  cheechalkers  and  their  new 
fangled  machines. ' ' 

"Maybe  that  's  so,"  said  a  broad,  squat  Ohioan,  the 
man  Hildegarde  had  noticed  before,  going  about  the 
ship  with  a  tiny  bottle,  a  little  square  of  sheet  copper, 
and  a  deal  of  talk.  "Maybe  that  's  right.  But  you  old 
sour-doughs  lost  a  terrible  lot  o'  leaf  and  flour  gold 
whenever  you  did  n't  use  amalgam  plates  in  your  rock 
ers." 

"  'T  ain't  so  easy  gittin'  plates." 

'T  is  now ! ' '  said  the  Ohioan,  producing,  as  it  were, 
automatically,  his  little  square  of  copper  and  his  bottle 
of  fluid. 

"Quicksilver,  is  n't  it?"  Hildegarde  came  nearer 
Cheviot  to  ask. 

" Quacksilver,  I  guess,"  but  still  he  followed  the  dis 
cussion  about  the  McKeown  "process"  as  though  Hilde 
garde  had  been  a  hundred  miles  away. 

* '  Now,  you  just  time  me, ' '  the  Ohioan  was  challenging 
Cheviot.  "I  can  silver-plate  this  copper  in  twenty  sec 
onds  by  the  watch."  And  he  did  it.  The  only  person 
there  who  was  not  a  witness  to  the  triumph  was  the  girl 
whose  clear  eyes  seemed  to  follow  the  process  with  a  look 
of  flattering  interest.  Should  she,  after  all,  tell  Louis, 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  377 

not  how  glad,  but  just  that  she  was  glad  of  his  coming? 
Had  n't  he  earned  that  much?  Not  that  he  seemed  to 
care  greatly  about  acknowledgments  from  her.  He 
seemed  to  have  forgotten  her  existence  already,  and  they 
had  n't  been  together  twenty  minutes.  All  the  simpler, 
then ! 

"I  tell  you  what!"— the  Ohioan  had  raised  his  voice 
and  enlarged  his  sphere  of  influence— "I  tell  you  there  's 
a  lot  o'  poor  prospectors  would  have  been  rich  men  to 
day  if  only  I  'd  discovered  sooner  how  to  make  amalgam 
plates  this  easy  and  this  cheap." 

" Cheap,  is  it?" 

"Yes,  a  damned  lot  cheaper  than  losin'  half  your  gold. 
Cheaper  than  linin'  your  rockers— yes,  and  your  sluices, 
too,  with  silver  dollars  as  some  fellers  did.  Now,  this 
little  piece  of  copper"— he  produced  a  new  bit— "a 
child  can  turn  that  into  an  amalgam  plate  by  my  pro 
cess.  Here,  let  the  lady  show  you."  Before  Hildegarde 
knew  what  was  happening,  the  fragment  of  metal  was  in 
her  hand  and  the  owner  had  tipped  the  tiny  bottle  till  a 
drop  of  the  liquid  ran  out  on  the  copper.  ' '  Quick !  Rub 
it  all  over." 

As  she  did  so,  she  saw  that  Cheviot's  attention  was 
now  undividedly  hers.  He  did  not  look  as  if  he  alto 
gether  approved  her  acting  as  show  woman.  But  not 
to  disappoint  the  inventor,  Hildegarde  rubbed  the  sil 
vered  tip  of  her  finger  lightly  and  evenly  over  the  copper. 
' '  Why,  yes ! ' '  she  cried  out.  '  *  Look ! ' '  And  as  she  held 
up  the  miraculous  result  the  Ohioan  roared  with  satis 
faction,  " Ain't  I  been  tellin'  you?"  The  copper  was 
turned  into  a  sheet  of  silver.  "Rub  and  rub  as  hard  as 
you  like  now"— he  passed  the  object-lesson  round— 


378  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"you  can  no  more  budge  a  particle  of  that  stuff  than 
you  can  rub  off  triple  plate.  And  that  's  what  you  want 
to  line  your  rockers  with ! ' ' 

"Looks  like  that  silverin'  business  might  be  worth 
somethin'.  " 

"Worth  a  clean  million,"  says  the  Ohioan,  as  he 
pocketed  his  bottle  of  miracle  and  walked  jauntily  away 
in  the  sunshine. 

Hildegarde  and  Cheviot,  exchanging  smiles,  went  on 
down  the  deck  in  his  wake.  But  suddenly  the  Ohioan 
stopped  and  wheeled  about  in  the  direction  of  a  voice 
that  had  just  said:  "No,  siree,  I  ain't  worrittin'  with  no 
Dingley  and  no  nothin'  I  ain't  never  tried."  The  in 
ventor  of  amalgam-plated  copper,  as  though  he  'd  heard 
himself  called  by  name,  retraced  his  steps  with  a  pre 
cipitation  that  nearly  capsized  Miss  Mar.  The  gentle 
man  who  had  just  declined  Dingley  squared  his  shoul 
ders  and  announced  to  all  and  sundry:  "No,  siree!  Y' 
got  to  show  me.  I  'm  from  Missoura."  Hildegarde 
caught  at  Cheviot's  arm.  "They  've  got  hold  of  our 
saying ! ' ' 

"Oh,  that  's  everybody's  saying  now,"  he  answered. 
"I  've  heard  it  twenty  times  since  I  came  on  board." 
She  waited,  incredulous,  listening.  "If  I  got  any  minin' 
to  do,"  the  man  from  Missouri  went  on,  "give  me 
Swain's  Improved  Amalgamator  every  time.  D'  ye 
know  what  they  done  to  test  Swain's  Improved  Amal 
gamator  1 ' ' 

"Nop." 

"Well,  lemme  tell  yer.  They  took  a  gold  dollar  and 
they  pulverized  it." 

"I  've  pulverized  many  a  dollar  in  my  day,"  says  a 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  379 

gloomy  and  familiar  voice.  While  the  deck  chuckled 
with  sympathy.  Hildegarde  whispered,  "That  's  my 
Blumpitty." 

"Well,  sir,"  the  other  went  on  unmoved,  "they  passed 
that  dollar  in  gold  dust  that  I  'm  tellin'  y'  'bout,  they 
passed  it  through  a  sixty-mesh  sieve,  and  they  mixed  it 
good  and  thorough  with  a  ton— a  ton,  sir,  of  gravel  and 
sand.  And  they  run  that  through  Swain's  Improved 
Gold  Amalgamator,  and  what  do  you  think  they 
goU" 

"Guess,"  says  Mr.  Blumpitty,  "they  got  to  know  that 
any  feller  can  pulverize  a  dollar— 

"Haw,  haw." 

«_but  it  's  the  daisy  that  can  pick  one  up." 

"Well,  sir,  Swain's  Improved  Amalgamator  's  jest 
that  kind  of  a  daisy.  It  picked  up  jest  exactly  ninety- 
eight  cents  out  of  that  gold  dollar."  And  every  owner 
of  a  rival  invention  roared  with  derision. 

"Oh,  Mr.  Purser!"  Louis  Napoleon  Brown  was 
hailed  with  a  suddenness  that  arrested  his  steps,  but  did 
not  deprive  him  of  his  haughty  mien.  ' l 1  find  I  owe  you 
an  apology,"  said  Miss  Mar. 

His  sternness  of  visage  relaxed  slightly.  "Well,  you 
have  treated  me  mighty  mean,"  he  admitted  in  a  low 
voice. 

Cheviot  was  staring  and  making  his  way  to  the  girl. 

"Yes,"  she  said,  with  a  subdued  air  that  might,  to  the 
purser,  have  seemed  to  be  penitential,  but  she  spoke  so 
that  Cheviot  could  hear,  "You  must  have  thought  it 
very  forward  of  me  to  call  you  'Louis,'  that  first  even 
ing.  I  meant  this  gentleman,  who  is  an  old  friend  of 
mine.  I  Ve  only  just  realized  how  mystified  you  must 


380  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

have  been."     Wherewith  she  took  Cheviot's  arm,  and 
away  the  two  went,  leaving  the  purser  transfixed. 

Oh,  the  sun-warmed  wind  blowing  in  your  face !  Oh, 
this  seeing  the  brave  world,  with  a  friend  at  your  side ! 

"I  don't  remember  you  at  meals,"  she  said  to  him. 

"I  never  was  at  meals." 

''Where  did  you  eat?" 

' '  Up  in  the  captain 's  room. ' ' 

"Well,  you  won't  any  more,  will  you?" 

"I  don't  know." 

"You  want  us  to  eat  apart!" 

"I  don't  'want. '  But  I  can't  turn  anybody  out  of  his 
seat,  and  they  're  all  taken." 

Well,  if  he  were  content  with  this  arrangement  it 
hardly  behooved  her  to  protest.  "Come  and  be  intro 
duced  to  my  Blumpitty.  I  can  tell  from  the  look  on  his 
face  exactly  what  he  's  talking  about." 

"What?" 

"Come  and  listen." 

"Ya-as,""  Blumpitty  was  saying,  ostensibly  to  Gov 
ernor  Reinhart,  but  really  to  a  distinguished  and  rapidly 
increasing  circle,  "Ya-as,  queerest  feller  ever  I  see." 

"Who  was?" 

"Why,  the  feller  I  found  dyin'  on  the  coast  up  above 
Cape  Polaris.  The  man  that  gave  me  the  tip.  I  can  see 
that  feller  now.  Could  n't  get  his  face  out  o'  my  head 
fur  months.  His  eyes— used  t'  see  them  eyes  in  my 
sleep."  Blumpitty  paused,  and  seemed  to  struggle 
feebly  with  an  incubus.  "Never  see  such  eyes  in  any 
man's  head  'fore  nor  since."  Again  he  paused  an  in 
stant  to  think  out  something.  "Reckon  it  makes  a  man 
look  like  that." 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  381 

"What  does?"  demanded  the  Governor. 

"Knockin'  up  agin  the  Mother  Lode." 

' '  Oh,  the  Mother  Lode ! ' '  said  Reinhart,  slightingly. 

"Ya-as;  those  of  us  that  's  practical  miners"— his 
look  weeded  out  the  Governor— "guess  we  all  know  that 
every  bit  o'  gold  that  's  found  its  way  to  the  creek  bot 
toms  and  the  coast,  it  's  all  come  from  the  Mother  Lode, 
off  there  in  them  low  ground— down  hills  to  the 
North." 

The  breathless  respect  with  which  this  information 
was  received  by  the  rest,  was  broken  in  upon  by  the  Gov 
ernor's  roaring  a  great  infidel  laugh.  "Why,  Joslin, 
here,  tells  me  the  gold  comes  out  o'  the  sea!" 

"Maybe  he  believes  it,"  says  Blumpitty,  sympathetic 
ally. 

"Believe  it!"  bellowed  Isaiah,  sticking  his  head  over 
Dr.  Daly's  shoulder.  "So  '11  you  believe  it  when  you 
get  to  Nome.  The  further  out  you  go  at  low  tide  the 
richer  you  '11  find  it. ' ' 

Blumpitty 's  pale-eyed  pity  for  his  delusion  seemed  to 
get  on  Joslin 's  nerves. 

"Was  n't  I  there  when  Jake  Hitz  and  Tough  Nut 
went  way  out  with  a  wheelbarra'?" 

"Any  man  can  go  out  with  a  wheelbarra ', "  said 
Blumpitty. 

"Yes,  but  it  ain't  every  man  can  come  back  with  pay 
dirt  and  rock  out  what  they  did. ' ' 

Blumpitty  just  smiled. 

"Twenty -two  hundred  dollars,  sir!" 

' '  Guess  you  were  n  't  watchin '  which  way  they  went  for 
that  dirt  ? ' '  said  one  of  the  capitalists. 

"That  's  right!"  laughed  his  partner.     "Tough  Nut 


COME  AND  FIND  ME 

must  have  got  that  twenty-two  hundred  out  of  the  tun 
dra." 

"Hope  that  is  n't  where  you  fellows  count  on  findin' 
gold/'  said  Joslin,  sympathetically. 

"We  just  about  are." 

"Why,  don't  you  know  the  tundra  's  froze  the  year 
round  ? ' ' 

"That  's  why  we  're  takin'  up  thawin'  machines— 
$90,000  worth." 

"Might  as  well  take  up  ninety  thousand  planners  and 
play  toons  to  the  tundra." 

As  though  this  idea  had  some  special  significance  for 
him,  a  poorly-dressed  boy  detached  himself  from  the 
group  with  a  cheerful  whistling  of  the  eternal  Boulanger 
march. 

"There  's  a  hell  of  a  lot  o'  machinery  goin';  I  ain't 
sorry  I  'm  takin'  in  chickens  m'self,"  observed  Hilde- 
garde's  table  companion. 

Cheviot  caught  the  eye  of  the  whistling  boy  as  he  went 
by.  ' '  What  are  you  taking  in  1 " 

The  boy  held  up  a  banjo.  "This!"  he  laughed,  and 
went  briskly  back  to  the  dancers  in  the  steerage. 

Hildegarde  smiled  into  Cheviot's  eyes.  "Was  n't 
that  nice  1 ' '  How  easily  he  made  people  say  amusing,  re 
vealing  things.  "Do  you  notice  how  happy  everybody 
looks  to-day?" 

"Yes,"  he  admitted.  "The  Los  Angeles  is  a  pretty 
dismal  place,  but  most  of  these  people  have  been  happier 
on  this  horrible  ship  than  they  've  been  for  years.  Hap 
pier,  some  of  them,  than  they  've  ever  been  before. ' ' 

She  did  n't  quite  like  him  to  speak  so  of  the  Los  An 
geles.  Yesterday  she  would  have  agreed.  But  to-day— 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  383 

"How  do  you  know  they  're  happier  here?"  (Shame 
on  him  if  he  was  n  't.  But  it  was  just  as  well.  Oh,  much 
simpler ! ) 

"Talk  to  them  and  you  11  see.  Everybody  on  the  ship 
has  had  the  worst  luck  you  ever  heard  of;  and  all 
through  l circumstances  over  which'!"  His  voice  made 
a  period,  with  that  old  trick  of  assuming  a  phrase  com 
plete,  when  you  could  finish  it  for  yourself.  "Even 
those  that  look  prosperous  like  you  and  me,  they  Ve  all 
failed  at  the  main  business  of  life. ' ' 

So  far  as  she  was  concerned  in  this  review  she  felt 
only  impatience  at  his  going  back  upon  old  loss  and 
pain.  What  if  you  have  been  sorry  and  sad.  It  was  n  't 
the  part  of  a  friend  to  remind  you  of  it.  But  if  Louis 
must  talk  of  failure  here  was  a  ship-load  of  it !  She  told 
herself  this  thought  was  the  hag  that  was  riding  her  hap 
piness  down.  She  looked  round  her.  The  world  was  a 
pretty  terrible  place,  after  all,  "for  the  mass,"  that  Mrs. 
Locke  had  taunted  her  with  not  caring  about.  The  wind 
blew  out  a  wisp  of  straight,  fair  hair  till  it  played  like  a 
golden  flame  above  the  brim  of  her  hat  of  Lincoln-green. 

' '  A  whole  ship-load  of  failure  ! ' '  she  said  aloud.  A 
sense  of  the  grim  business  life  was  for ' '  the  mass ' '  pressed 
leaden,  and  the  scarlet  mouth  closed  pitiful  upon  the 
words,  "Poor,  poor  people!"  But  Cheviot,  with  his 
eyes  on  that  beguiling  little  flame  of  gold,  was  ready  to 
reassure  her.  It  did  n't  matter  if  every  soul  on  board 
had  seen  unmerciful  disaster  follow  fast  and  follow 
faster,  up  to  the  hour  he  set  foot  upon  the  ship.  Hilde- 
garde  need  n 't  waste  her  pity.  Look  at  their  faces,  listen 
to  them  making  incantations  with  McKeown  and  Ding- 
ley.  Anything  would  do  to  work  the  spell.  Why?  Be- 


384  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

cause  the  place  they  were  bound  for  had  the  immense 
advantage  of  being  unknown.  No  one  could  say  of  any 
of  these  contrivances,  "It  's  been  tried."  "Not  a  soul 
on  the  ship  but  has  his  thawing  machine  or  his  banjo, 
or-" 

"Or  her  black  cook." 

He  nodded.  How  well  they  understood  each  other, 
"Some  talisman. 

1 1  What  's  ours  ? ' '  said  the  girl  quickly. 

"Our  what?" 

"Our  talisman." 

"Oh,  I  was  n't  thinking  of  us." 

"Think  now." 

"I  don't  know." 

"Well,  I  know  what  mine  is." 

"You  won't  tell  me,  I  suppose." 

"Why  not?"  She  spoke  lightly,  even  a  little  teas- 
ingly.  "It  's  a  sort  of  rough  diamond,  my  talisman. 
Or"— her  sunny  look  flashed  in  his  face— "perhaps  it  's 
adamant.  Which  is  the  most  unyielding?"  Then,  with 
sudden  gravity,  "It  's  a  wonderful  thing,  the  trust  you 
make  people  feel.  Nothing  can  shake  it. ' ' 

"I  thought  we  were  talking  about  talismans." 

"It  makes  every  difficult  thing  seem  easy.  And  it 
makes  every  dangerous  thing  seem  safe." 

"Well,  it  's  the  very  last  effect  I  intend  to  produce!" 

She  swept  his  declaration  aside.  "Impossible  to  feel 
anything  can  go  very  wrong  now  that  you  're  here. ' ' 

His  face  was  so  unmoved  by  this  handsome  tribute  that 
she  found  herself  venturing  further.  "I  don't  know 
why  I  should  pretend  I  don't  appreciate.  I  've  been  so 
afraid  these  last  days-  " 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  385 

He  caught  at  that.    "Afraid,  were  you?" 
"Afraid  that  one  of  us  two  would  die  before  I  had  a 
chance  to  tell  you. ' '    Should  she  go  on  ?    She  had  meant 
to  write— it  was  different  saying  it. 
"Tell  me  what?" 

"That  I  Ve  got  over  minding  your  having  opposed 
me  so."  If  she  expected  any  outburst  of  joy  on  his  part 
she  was  denied  the  spectacle.  "I  Ve  come  to  understand 
such  a  lot  of  things  on  board  this  ship."  She  waited  an 
instant,  but  he  leaned  over  the  railing  quite  silent,  star 
ing  down  into  the  water.  "Among  other  things,"  she 
went  on,  "I  see  when  I  look  back  that  you  Ve  always 
been  the  one  to  bring  me  strength.  A  feeling  that  I  'd 
set  my  feet  upon  the  rock— ' ' 

"And  it  was  n't  rock,  after  all,  what  you  set  your  feet 
on,"  he  said  quietly. 

She  tightened  her  hands  on  the  railing,   and  some 
thing  like  veiled  warning  crept  into  the  words:  "You  Ve 
made  me  feel  safer,  Louis,  than  any  one  else  in  the 
world.    I  owe  you  a  great  deal  for  that. ' ' 
"Oh,  owe!"    He  turned  away  impatiently. 
Not  the  sea-birds  sweeping  so  low  over  the  water  that 
their  white  feather  brooms  raised  a  dust  of  silver  in  the 
sunlight ;  not  the  motley  crew  upon  the  ship  half  as  clear 
to  the  girl's  vision  as  that  little  figure  with  the  flags  in 
his  hat  patroling  a  deserted  street  in  the  dawn.     "One 
reason  people  depend  on  you  so  is,  I  suppose,  because 
they  see  as  I  do,  it  is  n't  only  that  you  're  good  to  some 
particular  one.    You  'd  be  good  to  anybody." 
"Oh,  would  I!" 

"Just  as  you  gave  up  your  Fourth  of  July  to  be 
watchman  for  the  neighbor's  boy." 

25 


386  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"How  did  you  get  hold  of  that  yarn?" 

"Barbara—" 

"Well,  look  here"— he  moved  his  square  shoulders 
uneasily,  like  one  in  an  ill-fitting  coat.  "Look  here,  if 
you  're  thinking  of  trying  to  make  a  hero  out  of  me— it 
is  n't  any  earthly— ' 

"Hero?  Nonsense.  We  were  talking  about  talis 
mans,"  she  said,  with  recovered  gaiety.  "I  have  n't 
brought  along  a  machine  of  any  sort,  and  I  have  n't  got 
a  black  cook.  Not  even  a  banjo !  But  I  've  got  a  friend ! ' ' 
she  triumphed.  "So  I  can't  be  scared  now  any  more 
than  the  rest  of  the  wild  adventurers. ' ' 

1 '  Then  you  were  scared  ? ' ' 

"Oh,  here  she  is!  Mrs.  Locke!  This  is  'the  sort  o' 
watchman '  I  was  telling  you  about. ' ' 

In  the  act  of  holding  out  her  hand,  the  woman's  deli 
cate  face  took  on  that  marble  look  that  once  or  twice 
Hildegarde  had  seen  there.  And  the  hand  dropped  be 
fore  it  reached  Cheviot's. 

Hildegarde  looked  from  one  to  the  other.  "Why, 
what  is  it?" 

"We  have  met  before,"  said  Mrs.  Locke. 

"When  was  that?" 

"On  the  Seattle  wharf." 

"Oh,  I  did  n't  remember." 

"I  do.    You  are  the  man  who  nearly  broke  my  arm." 


CHAPTER  XX 

RS.  LOCKE  had  gone  below  and  left  them 
staring  at  one  another. 

"I  have  n't  the  smallest  recollection  of 
the  woman. ' ' 

She  clutched  at  hope.     "You  could  n't 
have  been  the  one." 

"She  does  n't  seem  to  have  much  doubt  about  it." 

"But  you  did  n't— I  'm  sure  you  did  n't." 

' '  I  certainly  did  push  my  way  about  in  that  crowd. ' ' 

"So  did  everybody." 

"  I  'm  afraid  it  stands  to  reason  a  man  does  that  kind 
of  thing  more  effectually  than  a  woman.  Your  Mrs. 
What  's-her-name  may  be  right." 

"Oh,  Louis!" 

"If  she  is,  I  'm  sorry." 

"You  simply  could  n't  have— 

"Well,  I  don't  know.  I  remember  perfectly,  I  was 
frantic  at  not  finding  you. ' ' 

Ashamed  of  the  warmth  his  words  brought  welling  up 
about  her  heart—  "And  you  did  n't  think  much  of  the 
women  you  did  find.  Yes,  I  remember  what  you  said 
about  the  women  who  go  on  this  sort  of  journey.  But 
you  're  wrong,  you  see.  I  know  them  now. ' ' 

He  made  no  answer.  Just  stood  there,  hands  in  pock 
ets,  arctic  cap  rolled  back,  so  that  it  sat  turban-like  on 

387 


388  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

the  crown  of  his  head ;  the  perplexity  in  the  face  giving 
way  to  a  somewhat  dogged  good-temper  that  declined  to 
be  ruffled  by  the  incident. 

"Some  of  the  women  are  just  as— are  more  deserving 
of  being  treated  well  than  I  am. " 

"Oh,  I  dare  say  some  of  them  are  all  right."  He 
leaned  against  the  railing,  his  square  chin  lifted,  and  he 
studied  the  man  in  the  crow's-nest— but  he  went  on  say 
ing  in  that  cool  way,  "I  'm  not  denying  that  I  would 
have  broken  any  number  of  bones  rather  than  not  get  to 
you  in  time  to  save  you  from  coming  to  harm. 

"Oh,  don't  say  it!  That  's  exactly  what  Mrs.  Locke 
thinks." 

"Oh,  Mrs.  Locke!"— he  moved  his  shoulders  impa 
tiently—  "I  'm  sorry  if  she  got  hurt.  But  in  my  opinion 
neither  of  you  ought  to  have  been  there.  Don't  think 
my  view  about  that  is  altered  by  your  having  come  off 
scot  free  so  far.  You  see  somebody  did  suffer." 

"Mrs.  Locke." 

"It  's  just  a  chance  it  was  n't  you." 

"Don't  you  see  that  it  would  n't  be  a  chance  if  men 
treated  all  women  as  well  as  you  'd  have  treated  me ?' ' 

"Men  would  have  to  feel  about  all  women  as  I  feel 
about  you  before  that  could  come  about,  and  that 
would  n't  even  be  desirable.  It  certainly  is  n't  practical 
politics." 

"Oh,  I  wish  I  were  clever  and  could  argue.  I  know 
there  are  things  to  say  only  I  don't  see  how  to  put 

them." 

"There  's  this  to  say  "-he  stood  up,  a  little  impa 
tiently— "I  've  never  posed  as  a  passive  individual.  If  I 
see  things  in  my  way  I"— he  made  an  expressive  little 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  389 

gesture— "I  set  them  aside.  If  I  hurt  Mrs.  Locke  in 
setting  her  aside,  I  'm  sorry.  But  women  have  no  busi 
ness  being  in  the  way  at  such  times." 

"I  am  glad  to  think  you  are  n't  in  your  heart  taking 
it  as  lightly  as  you  pretend. ' ' 

But  the  incident  rather  spoilt  things.  Instead  of 
being  able  to  yield  unreservedly  to  the  comfort,  yes,  the 
joy  of  his  being  there,  a  counter  influence  was  at  work. 
A  watchfulness,  critical,  even  painful.  Not  so  much  of 
Cheviot  as  of  herself.  Was  she  the  kind  of  girl  Mrs. 
Locke  had  meant?— the  kind  who  said,  "I  'm  all  right. 
What  does  it  matter  about  other  women."  Something 
in  her  soul  revolted  at  the  charge.  In  other  moods  she 
was  conscious  only  of  a  blind  rebellion  against  this  evil 
trick  fate  had  played  her— perversely  thrusting  into  the 
foreground  a  thing  so  little  representative  of  the  man. 
Offering  this,  forsooth,  as  a  symbol  of  all  that  lay  be 
hind.  A  lying  symbol.  He  was, n't  like  that.  Was  he? 
He  had  been  "frantic"  about  her.  Ah,  the  subtle  dan 
ger  of  that  solace,  feeding  self-love,  divorcing  her  from 
her  less  fortunate  sisters. 

Few  people  minded  the  lowering  weather  the  next  day, 
since  it  brought  a  sight  of  land.  Yet  one  had  need  to  be 
at  sea  for  a  week  and  a  half  to  find  comfort  in  this 
vision  of  a  dim  gray  rock  rising  out  of  a  gray  sea  to 
starboard;  or  on  the  port  side,  a  range  of  snow-flecked 
hills,  with  clouds  hanging  low  over  the  crater  of  an  ex- 
tint  volcano.  How  bleak  the  world  up  here  in  the 
Aleutians!  Then  suddenly,  for  Hildegarde,  the  chill 
vision  warmed  and  glowed.  "This  is  the  kind  of  thing 
John  Galbraith  is  looking  at  on  the  other  side  of  the 
globe!" 


390  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

To  every  one's  huge  satisfaction  the  Los  Angeles, 
skirting  Ounalaska,  showed  no  sign  of  pausing.  Instead 
of  turning  off  toward  Dutch  Harbor  to  learn  if  the  ice 
had  yielded  up  yonder  and  the  way  was  clear,  boldly  the 
ship  took  the  short  cut  through  Unimak  Pass  into  the 
Bering  Sea.  What  splendid  time  they  were  making 
under  the  convoy  of  this  best  of  all  captains !  People 
went  about  boasting,  '  *  Nome  by  Sunday ! ' ' 

"We  '11  make  the  record  trip !" 

" — Make  the  big  fortunes!" 

"We  '11  beat  creation!" 

"Splendid  fellow,  our  captain!" 

Never  such  luck  before  in  this  bedeviled  course. 

Toward  three  o'clock  the  next  morning  Hildegarde 
was  waked  by  the  noise  of  hurrying  feet  above  her  head 
and  a  great  hubbub  in  the  saloon. 

' '  Mrs.  Locke  1 ' '    Her  berth  was  empty. 

In  the  narrow  cabin  two  half-dressed  women  were 
agitatedly  hunting  their  belongings,  while  the  dress 
maker,  Miss  Tillie  Jump,  screamed  through  the  door  to 
know  if  there  was  any  danger. 

"What  's  happened?"  asked  Hildegarde,  tumbling 
down  out  of  her  berth. 

1 1  We  are  in  the  ice. ' ' 

"Masses  all  round  us  high  as  the  ship." 

Certainly  Mrs.  Locke  had  vanished.  "I  'm  very 
calm,"  said  Miss  Mar  to  herself,  with  a  certain  admir 
ing  surprise.  And  then  her  self-esteem  fell  from  her 
with  the  realization  that  in  the  back  of  her  head  she 
knew  there  could  not  possibly  be  any  immediate  danger, 
or  Cheviot  would  have  made  some  sign.  All  the  same, 
her  tranquillity  did  not  prevent  her  from  picturing  a 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  391 

shipwreck,  in  which  the  clearest  impression  was  that  of 
Cheviot  saving  Mrs.  Locke's  life  at  risk  of  his  own.  The 
lady's  heartfelt  acknowledgments  and  tableau. 

On  deck,  in  the  gray  milky  light,  a  different  picture. 
No  Cheviot  and  no  discernible  danger.  Plenty  of  broken, 
moving  ice,  but  nothing  like  the  towering  bergs  of  saloon 
rumor.  Going  forward  at  low  pressure  the  Los  Angeles 
was  picking  her  way  among  the  water-worn  shapes  that 
stood  dazzling  white,  each  on  a  pale  green  base,  sub 
merged  yet  partly  visible.  Strange  sculpture  of  the  sea, 
that,  like  a  Rodin  statue,  gained  meaning  as  you  gazed. 
This  rough-hewn  mass  was  a  crouching  polar  bear ;  that 
a  saurian,  antediluvian,  vast.  Some  of  the  ice-cakes, 
flat,  featureless,  were  mere  lonely  white  rafts  drifting 
from  nowhere,  bound  nowhere ;  others  manned  by  dwarf 
snowmen,  misshapen,  spectral. 

Though  so  unlike  report,  there  was  something  here  ex 
pected,  hauntingly  familiar,  like  a  single  surviving  im 
pression  out  of  a  vanished  life.  From  a  long,  long 
distance  0  'Gorman 's  voice  recalled  her  as  he  came  down 
the  deck  with  Mrs.  Locke.  "What  do  you  think  of  this 
for  a  change  ? ' ' 

Hildegarde  was  still  looking  round  for  Cheviot,  as 
she  answered,  "It  's  all  much  flatter  and  less  tremen 
dous  than  I  expected. ' ' 

1 '  Three  fourths  of  the  ice  is  under  water.  I  'm  afraid 
you  '11  find  it  quite  tremendous  enough. ' ' 

Here  at  last  was  Louis !  '  *  What  's  going  to  happen  ? ' ' 
Hildegarde  hailed  him. 

He  only  pulled  off  his  cap  for  her  benefit.  It  was  to 
0 'Gorman  he  said,  half  aside,  "We  '11  have  to  get  out 
of  this." 


392  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

While  the  two  men  stood  there  looking  gravely  out, 
the  ship  put  her  nose  into  the  ice-pack,  shivered,  and 
drew  back. 

"What  's  happening?'7 
' '  They  're  reversing  engines. " 

Hildegarde  had  put  her  question  with  a  dawning 
sense  of  obscurer  energies  here  at  work  than  she  had 
apprehended,  and  with  that  the  thought  of  Galbraith 
took  on  a  sudden  something  like  its  old  ineluctable  hold 
on  her  imagination.  These  the  forces  that  had  fash 
ioned  life  for  him.  Yes,  and  for  others,  too. 

The  whole  of  that  raw  morning  she  haunted  the  upper 
deck,  for  the  most  part  alone.     If  Mrs.  Locke  avoided 
her,  it  would  seem  that  Cheviot  was  inclined  to  do  the 
same.    He  had  struck  up  a  friendship  with  0 'Gorman. 
They  walked  about  or  sat  together  in  the  smoking-room. 
The  feeling  of  tension  that  pervaded  the  Los  Angeles 
was  manifest  even  in  the  Kangaroo  Court.     No  livelier 
precinct  hitherto  on  the  Los  Angeles  than  this  part  of 
the  fo'e'sle,  where,  from  the  eminence  of  the  judge's 
bench  (a  great  coil  of  rope),  Mr.  Gedge  imposed  upon 
his  much-diverted  public  a  parody  of  those  forms  of 
legal  procedure  learned  in  his  experience  as  a  shorthand 
reporter  of  "cases,"  or,  as  he  called  himself,  a  court 
stenographer.     Gedge  modeled  his  style  upon  those  ad 
ministrators  of  justice  who  think  because  a  man  has 
disobeyed  one  law,  his  fellow-creatures  may  with  respect 
to  him   (or  rather  without  "respect")   break  all  rules 
governing  human  intercourse.     With  the  aid  of  unlim 
ited  audacity  and  a  ready  tongue,  Mr.  Matthew  Gedge 
made  things  lively  within  the  precincts  of  the  Kangaroo 
Court.     And  with  impunity,  for  an  unwritten  law  or- 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  393 

dains  that  no  one,  however  great  a  personage,  shall  dare 
to  defy  the  authority  of  the  mock  court,  or  can  safely 
set  aside  its  judgments.  Woe  betide  any  one  who  seri 
ously  persists  in  so  unpopular  a  course.  Whatever  the 
case  being  tried,  no  bystander,  no  unwary  passer  even, 
but  goes  in  peril  of  being  summoned.  If  he  know  him 
self  unable  to  beat  Gedge  at  the  sharp  word  game,  it 
behooves  the  witness  to  bear  himself  meekly.  If  he 
thinks  to  flee,  let  him  expect  to  hear  Gedge  roar  with 
grim  zest,  ''Constable!  Do  your  duty.  Arrest  that 
man ! ' '  and  sometimes  half  way  to  cover  the  offender  is 
caught  and  haled  back  amid  a  general  hilarity,  to  find 
himself,  however  confused,  speechless  or  unwilling, 
clapped  into  the  witness-box  (a  big  iron  boiler)  and  kept 
stewing  there  while  he  meets  as  best  he  may  a  fire  of  mer 
ciless  questions  and  the  bubbling  merriment  of  the  deck. 

But  to-day  the  sittings  of  the  Court  were  suspended. 
The  loungers  who  came  to  Gedge  for  diversion  or  en 
lightenment,  got  only  a  grumbled,  ' '  I  pass ! "  or  "  Guess 
we  're  euchred ! ' '  And  even  such  popularity  as  Gedge 's 
was  threatened  with  eclipse  for  putting  into  words  the 
silent  misgivings  of  all  men.  The  very  sky  looked  evil. 
The  ragged  gray-brown  clouds  had  been  racing  across 
the  heavens  like  tatterdemalions  hearing  of  mischief 
afoot  and  eager  for  a  share.  Now  they  were  massed 
there  in  the  southwest,  a  dirty,  featureless  mob,  in  which 
the  ineffectual  units  were  lost  and  the  whole  fused  into 
a  vast  somber-hued  menace. 

The  faithful  Blumpitty  sought  out  Miss  Mar. 
"No— o,"  he  drawled,  rolling  his  eye  among  the  fantastic 
ice  shapes.  ' '  No— o,  it  don 't  look  good  to  me,  this  don 't. ' ' 
But  Blumpitty  had  news.  "That  feller  who  discovered 


394  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

—yes.  And  wus  dyin'  as  hard  as  he  could  last  fall. 
Well,  he  's  alive  yet." 

' '  How  do  you  know  ? ' ' 

"Joslin  says  so.  He  had  a  letter  at  Seattle  from  a 
man  who  'd  come  down  to  Nome  from  Polaris  over  the 
ice  at  Christmas.  Not  that  it  matters  much.  The  sick 
feller  don't  seem  to  have  let  on  to  them  others.  Any 
ways,  they  's  good  and  plenty  in  the  Mother  Lode. 
What  I  don't  see  is  how  he  managed  it." 

"Managed  what?" 

"To  hang  on.  If  ever  I  see  death  in  a  man's  face! 
But  I  always  said  they  wus  n't  like  anything  I  ever 
seen  before." 

"What  was  n't?" 

"Them  eyes." 

"Near  Nome,  is  it— the  place  where  he—" 

' l  Oh,  no,  a  good  ways  north. ' ' 

' '  Heavens,  north  even  of  Nome  1 ' ' 

"Yes,  it  's  the  farthest  north  camp  they  is.  Think  o' 
him  hangin '  on  all  through  the  winter.  In  that  place ! ' ' 
Blumpitty's  pale  gaze  sought  vainly  for  enlightenment 
among  the  moving  ice  masses. 

"People  do  get  through  in  worse  places  than  that," 
said  his  companion. 

"They  ain't  no  worse  places  than  Polaris." 

"Yes,  there  's  Franz  Josef  Land." 

"Never  heard  o'  that  camp." 

"I  wish  7  were  going  as  far  as  Polaris." 

"Why,  come  right  along." 

She  laughed.  "I  only  wish  I  could.  I  'd  like  to  know 
a  man  who  'd  lived  in  the  farthest  north  camp  of  all— 
the  farthest  on  our  side.  What  's  that?" 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  395 

"Where?" 

"Out  there."  She  pointed  to  a  ghostly  something, 
faint  as  smoke  against  the  high  light  of  the  ice  rim  on 
the  far  horizon. 

Blumpitty  stared.  "Reckon  it  's  a  cloud.  "They  's 
two  more !  And  another.  No,  by  gum,  it  's  ships ! ' ' 

And  ships  they  were,  five  of  them,  the  first  seen  since 
leaving  Vancouver! — spectacle  to  stir  the  chilled  blood 
of  watchers  on  the  Los  Angeles.  For  these  dreamlike 
apparitions  were  vessels  such  as  theirs,  threatened  like 
them  with  ice-pack  and  with  storm.  A  detachment  of 
the  Nome  fleet !  None  came  any  nearer,  except  the  Ohio 
and  the  little  Charles  Nelson.  They  spoke  and  passed, 
the  Ohio  speedily  to  vanish ;  Charles  Nelson  to  tack 
about,  hunting  an  outlet,  and  then,  discouraged,  turn 
south  as  the  bigger  Los  Angeles  pushed  valiantly 
through  the  ice  to  the  North.  ' '  Turn  back !  No  use ! ' ' 
Charles  Nelson  warned,  and  then,  quicker  than  ever  you 
saw  in  your  life,  the  fog  swooped  down  and  wiped  every 
thing  off  the  ocean  except  the  nearer  ice.  The  Los  An 
geles  turned  and  tacked  about  to  the  tune  of  the  fog 
horn,  trying  to  find  a  way  through  the  heavier  floe,  only  to 
be  headed  off  by  bigger  masses  looming  through  the  haze, 
majestic  slow-sailing  ice-ships,  some  like  white  gondolas, 
some  like  sturdy,  low-built  castles  set  fantastically  on  a 
field  of  fleece,  for  the  exposed  parts  of  the  berg  had 
rotted  in  the  sun,  and  in  the  wind  been  rippled,  so  that 
a  nearer  sight  showed  the  surfaces  honeycombed,  disinte 
grate.  And  again  to  Hildegarde  Mar  came  that  sense  of 
its  all  being  familiar,  as  though  she  had  been  here  before. 
So  she  had,  in  spirit.  With  a  thrilling  sense  of  recogni 
tion  she  discovered  the  original  of  more  than  one  picture 


396  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

in  that  book  of  Galbraith's  that  she  and  Bella  had  pored 
over  in  their  school-days. 

When,  early  in  the  afternoon,  the  fog  lifted  a  little,  a 
message  came  from  the  captain  inviting  Miss  Mar  to  the 
bridge  that  she  might  have  a  better  view.  By  the  time 
she  had  obeyed  the  summons  the  wind  had  risen.  The 
captain  was  looking  through  his  glass,  and  Mrs.  Locke 
was  at  his  side.  He  left  both  visitors  with  harassed  face 
and  called  down  to  Cheviot  walking  below  with  0 'Gor 
man.  And  now  Louis  stood  beside  the  captain  on  the 
bridge,  looking  to  the  northeast,  and  talking  in  an  under 
tone. 

"What  does  he  know,"  said  Mrs.  Locke,  referring  to 
Cheviot  for  the  first  time,  "about  navigation?" 

"Nothing,  I  should  think,"  said  Hildegarde  serenely, 
yet  with  that  stirring  of  pride  that  visits  a  woman  when 
the  man  she  is  interested  in  is  called  to  counsel.  "You 
see  Louis  has  been  up  here  before,  and  so  few  people 
have." 

"  Oh ! "  Mrs.  Locke  turned  indifferently  away  and  looked 
out  over  the  white-patched  water.  The  girl  felt  anew 
and  keenly  the  embarrassment  that  had  come  of  the  con 
frontation  of  these  two.  Impossible  for  her  to  think  it 
did  n't  matter.  No  vulgarity  of  soul  helped  her  to  meet 
the  issue  with,  "Mrs.  Locke  's  'nobody,'— a  little  book 
keeping  woman  we  shall  never  see  again!"  She  could 
not  even,  as  a  feebler  nature  would,  simply  ignore  the 
incident  of  the  day  before,  accepting  for  Louis  Mrs. 
Locke's  evil  opinion,  accepting  for  Mrs.  Locke  his 
professed  regret  but  real  indifference,  verging  on  dis 
like. 

"Of  course,"  Hildegarde  drew  closer,  "I  've  thought 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  397 

a  great  deal  about  what  happened  yesterday— I  mean 
what  happened  on  the  wharf." 

"Oh,  put  it  out  of  your  head." 

"It  's  hardly  been  out  of  my  head  a  minute,  except 
the  two  hours  I  slept  this  morning. ' ' 

"I  ought  to  have  held  my  tongue." 

"I  'm  glad  you  did  n't.  Because  now  I  know  some 
thing  more  than  that  he  hurt  you." 

"  What  do  you  know  « " 

"How  much  he  can  hurt  me/'  was  on  her  tongue,  but 
the  only  answer  she  made  was,  "I  must  n't  let  you  think 
that  I  'm  going  to  turn  a  cold  shoulder  on  my  friend 
because— ' 

"Oh,  no."  It  was  said  not  scornfully— just  accept 
ing  it. 

"I  think  a  month  ago  I  would  either  not  have  believed 
it  or  I  would  have  explained  it  all  away  to  myself.  I  'd 
have  said  he  did  n't  know  what  he  was  doing.  He— he 
was_  Oh,  there  are  a  dozen  excuses  I  might  have  made 
for  him." 

"Yes,  dozens." 

"But  now  I  don't  make  one.  I  say,  'Yes,  he  did  it, 
and  he  does  n't  even  realize  how  terrible  it  was.'  : 

Mrs.  Locke  glanced  at  her  curiously.  "It  's  true  a 
good  deal  has  to  happen  before  men  and  women  can 
treat  each  other  fairly. ' ' 

Hildegarde  nodded.  "I  'm  beginning  to  see  that. 
Louis  has  n't  begun— not  yet.  But  about  other  things 
he  's  always  been  the  one  who  's  helped  and  taught  me. 
Done  it  for  lots  of  other  people,  too,  of  course,"  she 
hastened  to  add.  "I  'd  never  once  thought  of  him  as  a 
person  I  could  help. ' ' 


398  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"  And  now—  " 

"Now—  Her  grave  look  went  as  far  as  that  of  the 
blind  who  seem  to  descry  Truth  riding  on  the  viewless 
air,  or  sitting  on  the  round  world's  uttermost  rim.  Cer 
tainly  Hildegarde  had  been  given  such  extension  of 
vision  in  these  hours  that  plainly  enough  she  saw  that 
it  was  not  till  a  cloud  settled  on  Cheviot 's  fame  that  she 
knew  how  much  its  fairness  meant  to  her.  Acceptance 
of  that  had  brought  her  acquainted  with  yet  another 
new  aspect  of  experience.  Here  was  a  man  that  had 
everybody  and  everything  to  recommend  him— up  to 
yesterday.  Since  yesterday  she  knew  not  only  that  his 
nature  and  his  outlook  were  on  one  side  defective,  she 
had  glimpses  of  a  faith  that,  precisely  because  of  this, 
he  had  a  need  of  her  beyond  the  one  he  had  been  used  to 
urge.  A  light  shone  in  the  thought  that  there  was  some 
thing  she  could  do  for  him  that  perhaps  no  other  crea 
ture  could.  A  perception  this  of  infinite  significance  to 
such  as  Hildegarde  Mar,  belonging  as  she  did  to  the 
bigger  of  the  two  camps  into  which  womankind  are 
naturally  divided.  For,  pace  the  satirists,  those  of  her 
sex  who  make  most  stir  in  the  world  and  cause  most 
commotion  in  the  hearts  of  men— those  daughters  of  the 
horse  leech,  whose  unappeased  hunger  cries  ever  ' '  More, 
more !  Give !  and  give  again ! ' '  they  are  in  the  minority. 
To  the  larger,  if  less  striking  army,  those  whose  primal 
passion  is  to  give— of  them  was  Hildegarde. 

"It  looks  as  if— for  all  Louis  is  so  wonderfully  clear 
headed  and  I  'm  so— the  other  way,  there  are  some  things 
I  can  see  plainer  than  he.  But  it  seems  to  me  that  's 
only  a  reason  for"— her  voice  dropped  a  little— 
"for—" 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  399 

"Yes,"  said  Mrs.  Locke. 

Hildegarde  flushed  faintly.  "For  trying,  I  don't 
mean  by  preaching,  but  trying  to  help  him  to  see— well, 
some  of  the  things  you  've  given  me  an  inkling  of." 
She  laid  her  hand  gently  on  the  older  woman's.  Mrs. 
Locke's  fingers  closed  round  the  girl's,  but  she  said 
nothing.  "So,  though  he  nearly  broke  your  arm,  you 
will  have  done  him  a  service. ' ' 

The  white  face  smiled  its  enigmatic  little  smile.  But 
presently,  "  I  'm  glad  I  know  you, ' '  she  said. 

' '  Are  you  ?    Then  let  's  be  friends  1 ' ' 

As  though  some  tangible  barrier  had  been  beaten 
down  they  went  nearer  the  two  men.  The  captain  was 
ending,  "—and  if  the  ice  closes  in  behind  us  we  '11  be 
trapped. ' ' 

' '  Oh,  is  that  all ! "  said  Cheviot,  glancing  toward  Hil 
degarde. 

"No,  it  is  n't  all.  We  'd  be  carried  wherever  the  floe 
goes— and  that  's  not  Nome."  Gillies  lowered  the  glass, 
and  his  strained-looking  eyes  fell  on  the  two  he  had  for 
gotten.  "Sorry,  ladies,  you  must  go  below." 

Not  only  rather  snubbed,  but  feeling  now  the  gravity 
of  affairs,  Hildegarde  and  her  companion  departed  with 
some  precipitation,  while  the  captain's  hoarse  shout 
rang  out  in  an  indistinguishable  order  to  some  invisible 
officer. 

A  few  minutes  later,  standing  on  bales  of  merchandise 
for'ard  on  the  upper  deck,  they  watched  the  altering  of 
the  course  and  the  race  for  that  single  opening,  narrow 
and  ever  narrower  in  the  close-packed  ice.  It  was  ex 
citing  enough,  for  they  got  out  just  in  time.  Thirty-four 
hours  afterward  the  Los  Angeles  was  still  beating  about 


400  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

on  the  edge  of  the  pack,  looking  for  another  break  in  the 
long  white  line. 

The  spirits  of  the  passengers  steadily  sank.  To  their 
jealous  imagining  all  those  phantom  ships,  and  the  score 
unseen,  were  now  forging  ahead.  Only  the  Los  Angeles 
besieged  the  ice  in  vain.  Men  stood  in  knots  discussing 
the  captain's  mistakes  and  airing  their  own  knowledge. 
They  had  expected  this  state  of  things  if  he  persisted  in 
keeping  so  far  to  the  east.  Hour  by  hour  Gillies 's  credit 
fell. 

The  only  break  in  the  dead  monotony  of  the  after 
noon  was  suggested  in  the  general  invitation  to  come 
for'ard  and  hear  Gedge  roast  the  captain.  It  went  ill 
that  day  with  any  witness  in  Gillies 's  favor. 

In  the  middle  of  dinner  people  looked  up  from  their 
plates  and  said:  "What  's  that?" 

The  bean-feaster  was  the  first  to  find  his  tongue. 
"By  -  — ,"  he  said,  "we  Ve  stopped!"  The  passen 
gers  dropped  their  knives  and  forks  and  rushed  on  deck. 
The  bean-feaster  was  right.  In  trying  to  get  round  the 
eastern  shoulder  of  the  floe,  the  Los  Angeles  had  run 
aground  in  Norton  Sound,  thirty  miles  from  the  main 
land.  The  engines  were  reversed,  and  the  water  round 
the  propeller  was  set  boiling.  The  ship  never  budged. 
The  deck  resounded  to  the  uproar  of  many  tongues. 
To  waste  thirty-six  hours  feeling  her  way  round  the 
floe  was  bad  enough,  but  to  be  "hung  up  on  a  sand-bar," 
a  hundred  and  fifty  miles  from  Nome,  with  a  wicked- 
looking  ice-pack  bearing  down  on  you  from  the  west— ! 
And  here  comes  the  Charles  Nelson  once  more,  very 
perky  this  time,  profiting  by  the  object  lesson  and  steer 
ing  clear  of  the  bar.  The  Los  Angeles  humbled  her 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  401 

pride  to  ask  for  a  line.  "Can't  get  near  enough,"  the 
word  came  back.  "I  'm  in  three  fathom  now!"  and 
away  Charles  Nelson  goes,  leaving  the  big  steamer  to 
her  fate. 

"What  's  that  feller  calls  himself  a  captain,  what  's 
he  goin'  to  dof"  demanded  Mr.  Gedge  of  his  satellites. 

'Wait  for  the  tide!'  Yah!  He  's  got  the  most  high- 
spirited  idears  of  any  man  I  ever—  'Wait!'  After 
wastin'  two  days  and  nights  a 'ready!  'Wait!'  While 
the  other  fellers  are  knockin'  the  bottom  out  o' 
Nome!" 

This  was  a  harassing  thought,  but  the  captain  still 
had  his  apologists,  even  in  the  Kangaroo  Court.  It  was 
0 'Gorman's  friend  with  the  fiery  beard  who  dared  to 
point  out,  "Mr.  Gedge  told  us  on  Friday  and  Saturday 
the  captain  was  'incompetent  and  foolhardy.'  On  Sun 
day  and  Monday  he  's  'over-cautious  and  damnably 
slow.'  To-night  Mr.  Gedge  tells  us—" 

" To-night,"  that  gentleman  shouted,  "I  'm  tellin' 
you  still  more  about  this  -  -  captain.  Did  they  or  did 
they  not  say  to  us  in  Seattle  that  Gillies  was  a  first-rate 
seaman  ? ' ' 

"Yes,  and  so  he  is!" 

"Did  they  or  did  they  not  tell  us  he  knew  his  job?" 

"Right!  Knows  this  ship  as  you  know  the  way  to 
your  mouth." 

"Yah!  Knows  what  she  can  do  on  the  Japan  route. 
But  this,  gentlemen  and  ladies,  ain't  the  road  to  Manila. 
And  do  you  know  what?  This  here  is  Captain  Gillies 's 
first  trip  to  Alaska!"  Gedge  brought  it  out  with  a 
sledge-hammer  effect.  The  audience  felt  they  were  ex 
pected  to  be  dumfounded.  They  complied. 


20 


402  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

But  a  voice  was  heard:  "It  's  most  people's  first  trip 

to  Alaska." 

"I  tell  you,"  said  Gedge,  judicially,  "he  knows  as 
little  about  these  northern  seas  as  that  boy  there  with 
the  banjer. ' ' 

-This    self-appointed    judge,"    Cheviot's    voice    rose 
steadily  above  the  growing  murmur,  "has  n't  heard  ap 
parently  that  nobody  knows  these  waters." 
"Would  you  mind  repeatin'  that,  sir?" 
"Not  at  all.    In  the  first  place,  the  Bering  is  a  practi 
cally  uncharted  sea.     That  may  be  a  disgrace  to  our 
Coast  Survey,  but  it  's  hardly  the  captain's  fault." 

Gedge  looked  stumped  for  a  moment.     If  this  were 
true  it  would  n't  do  for  him  not  to  know  it. 

Cheviot  was  making  good  the  diversion  in  the  cap 
tain's  favor,  when  Gedge  interrupted:  "Does  the  cap 
tain's  friend  pretend  to  say  that  the  whalers  and  sealers 
and  fellers  who  've  been  up  here  before  gold  was 
thought  of- that  none  o'  them  don't  know  enough  to 
keep  off  a  damned  sand-bank?"  Looking  his  wiliest: 
"Now,  if  we  had  one  o'  them  sort  here-  Then,  with 
a  highly  effective  coup:  "Ladies  and  gentlemen,  we  got 

him!" 

"Here  on  this  ship?" 

"Right  here  on  board  the  Los  Angeles!1' 

"Where?      Who,    who?      Name?"      Everybody   but 

Cheviot   and   a   few  women  were  shouting  themselves 

hoarse. 

"What  y'  got  to  say  to  that,  Mr.  -  You,  there, 

with  the  arctic  cap  and  the  tender  heart  fur  cap 
tains  ? ' ' 

"I  've  got  this  to  say.    That  even  the  men  who  sailed 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  403 

along  here  last  fall,  don't  know  Norton  Sound  this  sum 
mer.  ' ' 

"Wot?" 

"Can't  know  it." 

"And  why  not?" 

"For  the  good  reason  that  new  sand-bars  are  formed 
up  here  every  spring.  Not  a  ship  that  sails  for  any  port 
on  the  northwest  coast  but  goes  on  what  's  practically  an 
exploring  expedition.  That  's  our  true  danger.  The 
captain 's  no  less  than  ours. ' ' 

"Oh,  yes,  we  all  know  you  're  in  with  his  nibs,  but 
what  my  friends  don't  know  is  that  Billings  &  Co.  sent  a 
pilot  aboard  this  ship. ' ' 

"Why,  then,"  roared  half-a-dozen  voices,  "why  ain't 
he  pilotin'!" 

"Why?"  Mr.  Gedge  shouted  above  the  din.  "/  can 
tell—  His  sentence  was  jerked  to  an  abrupt  close 
"What  in  hell  's  up?" 

Two  or  three  women  had  uttered  little  shrieks,  and, 
"What  was  that?"  people  asked  one  another.  Men 
turned  and  looked  in  each  other's  faces  "What  was 
it?" 

The  sudden  jar  and  vibration  of  the  ship  lent  added 
force  to  Mr.  Gedge 's  charge.  "The  reason  the  pilot 
ain't  pilotin'  is  because  the  captain  ordered  him  off  the 
bridge  the  second  day  out." 

"Now  I  know  what  it  means  when  the  papers  say, 
'Sensation  in  the  court'!"  a  little  Canadian  hospital 
nurse  whispered  to  Mrs.  Locke.  But  in  another  second 
she  was  clinging  to  that  lady  and  her  eyes  were  scared 
and  wide;  for,  as  if  under  the  assault  of  a  battering- 
ram,  the  Los  Angeles  was  shaking  from  stem  to  stern. 


404  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

Hildegarde  felt  a  warm  hand  laid  on  her  two,  tight- 
clasped  and  cold.  Cheviot  had  put  an  arm  through  the 
outer  fringe  of  the  group  where  she  and  Mrs.  Locke 
were  standing.  "Come  for'ard,"  he  said. 

"Was  that  the  ice?"  Mrs.  Locke  whispered,  allowing 
herself  to  be  drawn  along. 

All  the  rest  of  the  people  stood  hushed  for  a  moment 
as  if  stunned  by  the  concussion.  The  three  who  alone  in 
those  first  instants  seemed  to  retain  power  of  movement 
quietly  made  their  way  out  of  the  throng,  while  every 
ear  was  filled  with  the  horrible  secondary  sounds  of  that 
mighty  impact— a  slow  grinding,  a  horrible  gritting,  as 
of  granite  jaws  reducing  the  bones  of  prey  to  powder. 

' '  I  want  you  to  stay  here  till  I  come  back. ' '  Cheviot 
left  the  two  women  under  the  bridge.  As  Hildegarde 
listened  with  beating  heart  to  the  sound  of  the  ice 
against  the  ship,  she  said  to  herself:  "These  are  mo 
ments  Jack  Galbraith  has  known.  After  to-night  I  shall 
understand  better.  I  shall  be  closer  to  a  part  of  his  life 
than  Bella  ever  will."  Every  sense  was  set  to  note  the 
change  that  in  the  last  few  minutes  had  come  over  the 
spirit  of  the  ship.  No  wild  commotion,  a  hush  rather. 
But  a  thing  of  eery  significance.  No  more  shrill  haran 
gues  in  the  Kangaroo  Court.  No  dancing  on  the  upper 
deck.  No  tink-a-tink  of  banjo  in  the  steerage.  Men 
gathering  in  groups,  talking  for  the  most  part  quite 
quietly,  but  agreed  that  "the  old  sea  tramp"  would  n't 
stand  much  of  this  kind  of  thing.  With  a  single  mind 
the  women,  as  soon  as  they  had  pulled  themselves  to 
gether,  hastened  down  below. 

"I  think  I  '11  go  down,  too,  and  see—  "  Hildegarde  be 
gan.    ' '  I  won 't  be  two  minutes. ' ' 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  405 

" Where  are  you  going?" 

"To  the  cabin.  Do  you  want  anything  brought 
up?" 

"No." 

The  girl  was  longer  than  two  minutes,  but  she  was  no 
less  surprised  when,  upon  her  reappearance  with  a  small 
hand-bag,  she  found  Cheviot  talking  to  Mrs.  Locke. 
1  i  The  current  is  carrying  the  ice  out  all  right.  Probably 
the  only  danger  is  the  passengers  making  fools  of  them 
selves.  But  if  they  '11  only  go  quietly  to  bed— 

"They  won't,"  said  Mrs.  Locke.  The  two  discussed 
this  quite  in  the  tone  of  being  allies.  "Nobody  will  go 
to  bed  to-night, ' '  she  assured  him. 

'  *  What  do  they  want  to  do  ? "  he  demanded. 

"Sit  up  till  one  in  the  morning,"  Mrs.  Locke  an 
swered,  ' '  and  see  the  tide  float  us  off  the  bar. '  ' 

"Well,  the  women  at  all  events"— Cheviot  looked 
about  with  an  air  of  relief— "the  women  have  gone  to 
bed  already." 

"No,  indeed,"  said  Hildegarde.  "They  're  tumbling 
over  one  another  down  in  the  saloon,  in  and  out  of  the 
state-rooms  collecting  their  things.  Some  are  saying 
their  prayers,  and  some—' 

"Do  you  sing?"  Cheviot  demanded. 

"  I  ? "      Mrs.  Locke  stared.     "  No. " 

1 '  Who  does  ? "  he  appealed  to  Hildegarde. 

"I  don't  know." 

"Yes,  I  heard  a  woman  yesterday—'1 

"Oh,  that  awful  Miss  Pinckney,  you  know,  with  the 
draggled  feathers ! ' ' 

' '  Well,  go  and  find  her  and  get  her  to  sing  now. ' ' 

"Bingf" 


406  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"Yes,  sing.  It  may  make  just  all  the  difference." 
Cheviot  was  in  the  act  of  bolting  back  to  the  captain. 

'  *  She  can 't  sing. ' '    Hildegarde  followed  him  a  step. 

He  misunderstood  it  for  an  untimely  musical  criticism. 
* '  Then  let  her  make  a  noise  of  some  sort. ' ' 

"Oh,  she  's  doing  that— screaming  with  hysterics 
down  in  the  saloon."  Cheviot  flashed  back  to  say  con 
fidentially,  not  to  Hildegarde,  but  to  Mrs.  Locke:  "Go 
and  see  if  you  can't  get  up  a  concert."  With  which  cool 
and  apparently  crazy  suggestion  he  vanished. 

Twenty  minutes  later  a  woman,  wearing  diamond  ear 
rings  and  a  sealskin  jacket,  paused  in  her  flight  up  the 
companionway  and  leaned  an  instant,  panting,  against 
the  music-room  door.  Now  she  was  lifting  her  head  with 
a  slow  incredulity,  as  an  unsteady  voice  near  by  began 
to  quaver  out  a  rag-time  ballad,  highly  offensive  to  sensi 
tive  ears,  but  a  tune  familiar  and  to  many  on  the  ship 
most  dear.  The  woman  peered  round  the  half -open  door, 
staring  from  one  to  the  other  of  those  callous  creatures 
within,  making  merry  on  the  brink  of  destruction— 
Miss  Mar  at  the  piano,  and  at  her  side  the  draggled 
Miss  Pinckney.  Ah,  no,  that  red-eyed  woman  was  n't 
callous.  She  sang  the  inane  words  with  lips  that  trem 
bled.  Now  she  was  breaking  down. 

"No,  no.  Go  on,"  Miss  Mar  insisted.  "Think  of  the 
others. ' ' 

"They  '11  never  listen.    Everybody  's  too— too— 

"Well,  let  's  see.  Now!"  and  very  ineffectually  Hil 
degarde  took  up  the  second  verse.  Miss  Pinckney 
plucked  the  strain  away  as  two  men  looked  in.  There 
was  nothing  especial  to  take  them  up  or  down.  They 
stood  near  the  woman  with  the  diamond  ear-rings,  hardly 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  407 

knowing  that  they  listened.  In  that  first  twenty  minutes, 
every  time  the  ice  struck  the  ship,  Miss  Pinckney  would 
hesitate  and  her  voice  would  fly  off  the  scale  in  a  faint 
scream. 

"Oh,  please!  That  's  enough  to  scare  anybody!"  and 
Hildegarde  played  doggedly  on.  "Now,  let  's  try 
again!"  It  was,  however,  as  if  not  Miss  Mar's  admon 
ishing,  but  the  rude  insistence  of  the  tune  dragged  Miss 
Pinckney  along,  pulling  her  out  of  the  pit  of  her  fears 
and  landing  her  ' '  Down  along  the  Bowery, "  or  "  In  Gay 
Paree, ' '  or  some  place  equally  remote  from  the  sand-bar 
in  the  Bering  Sea. 

Mrs.  Locke,  with  the  Blumpittys  and  a  brace  of  doc 
tors  in  tow,  appeared  in  the  act  of  descending  for  a 
muster  of  "the  company."  Cheviot  came  flying  down 
behind  them,  two  steps  at  a  time.  He  was  about  to  turn 
in  at  the  music-room,  when  a  woman  pushed  past  him, 
showing  a  panic-stricken  face  above  the  sleeping  child 
that  she  carried  clutched  tight  against  her  breast.  A 
sudden  jar  made  the  sleeper  lift  a  cropped  head  and 
look  about  with  wide  eyes. 

' '  Hello ! ' '  said  Cheviot  reassuringly,  in  a  cheerful  and 
commonplace  voice.  "This  is  a  passenger  I  have  n't 
seen  before.  Are  n't  you  rather  too  big,  sir,  to  be  car 
ried?" 

—"has  n't  been  well!"  muttered  the  woman,  taking 
breath  to  recommence  the  ascent. 

"Look  here,  where  are  you  going  1"  And  without 
waiting  to  know,  "Some  of  us  can  carry—  He  was 
taking  the  burden  out  of  the  thin  arms. 

"No,"  remonstrated  the  woman,  as  Cheviot  turned  in 
at  the  music-room,  ' '  we  must  go  up  to  father, ' ' 


408  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"I  '11  send  him  down  to  you. ' ' 

"No,  no.    We  've  got  to  go  up  and— be  ready." 

" Beady  for  what?"  He  fixed  upon  the  woman  a  pair 
of  faith-inspiring  eyes  so  unclouded  that  she  stared. 

"Don't  you  want  to  listen  to  the  singing?"  Cheviot 
bent  smiling  to  the  little  person  who  lay  quite  content  in 
his  arms,  studying  the  man's  face  with  the  solemn  ab 
sorption  of  childhood. 

Not  many  there  besides  him,  but  because  Cheviot  had 
come  in  the  concert  had  begun.  Others  besides  Hilde- 
garde  felt  this  quickening  of  life  in  any  room  he  entered. 
Miss  Pinckney  remembered  she  had  the  music  of  a  "reel 
pretty  song"  out  of  the  "Belle  of  New  York."  She  'd 
go  and  get  it. 

"Do  you  hear  that?"  Cheviot  said,  depositing  the 
child  on  one  of  the  rickety  chairs.  "You  've  just  come 
in  time, ' '  and  he  stood  a  moment  talking  to  the  mother. 
The  child  sat  askew,  with  its  father's  great  waterproof 
cape  hitched  up  on  one  side  and  trailing  on  the  other. 
When  the  little  figure  made  the  slightest  movement  the 
lop-sided  chair  wobbled  and  threatened  collapse.  In 
stantly  the  child  desisted  and  became  nervously  en 
grossed  in  the  problem  of  a  nice  equilibrium.  The  little 
face  took  on  a  look  of  tense  uneasiness.  It  was  plain 
that  courage  was  lacking  so  much  as  to  pull  a  good  deep 
breath  lest  it  draw  ruin  down.  Cheviot,  still  talking 
with  the  mother,  turned  to  take  in  his  the  small  child 
hand  that  clutched  the  chair.  Was  it  the  look  of  heavy 
responsibility  in  the  small  face,  or  was  it  another  on 
slaught  of  ice  against  the  ship  that  made  him  say, 
"Music  's  soon  going  to  begin,  little— what  's  your 
name?" 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  409 

The  child  opened  thin  lips  and  emitted  a  careful 
sound. 

" Joseph?  Well,  I  hope  you  '11  like  the  concert, 
Joseph."  That  was  too  much  for  the  occupant  of  the 
siege  perilous.  There  was  a  howl  above  the  mother's 
reproachful  correction.  "Her  name  's  Josephine,"— a 
general  giving  way  to  overstrain,  and  chair  and  child 
were  in  ruins  on  the  floor. 

Miss  Mar,  glancing  over  her  shoulder,  shaking  with 
hysterical  laughter,  saw  that  Louis,  gathering  up  the 
sobbing  Josephine,  bit  his  lip  as  though  in  mere  dismay, 
forbearing  to  wound  the  luckless  one  by  laughing  at 
her  discomfiture. 

"Yes,  that  's  like  him,  too,"  Hildegarde  said  to  her 
self,  as  one  welcoming  one  more  of  a  cloud  of  witnesses. 
She  fell  upon  the  piano  with  redoubled  vigor.  Loud  and 
fast  she  hammered  out  the  wildest  jig  she  could  remem 
ber.  Miss  Pinckney  coming  back,  music  in  hand,  stopped 
with  a  scream.  Bang !  Bang !  Grit !  Grind !  went  the  ice. 
Josephine  shrieked  without  intermission  till  Cheviot, 
having  found  a  chair  with  more  than  three  legs,  anchored 
her  securely  in  that  haven.  With  the  first  words  of  Miss 
Pinckney 's  song,  Cheviot  was  flying  back  to  the  deck. 

Bang!  Grit!  Grind!  Was  she  awake,  Hildegarde 
asked  herself,  or  was  this  fetid  room  and  were  these 
harsh,  assailing  sounds  a  form  of  nightmare?  Steadily 
she  played  on.  Cheviot  looked  in  again,  but  it  was  to 
Mrs.  Locke  he  whispered:  "We  must  break  up  the 
Kangaroo  Court.  Musical  talent  going  to  waste  there." 
She  followed  him  out.  In  passing  Hildegarde  he  had 
bent  his  head.  "Keep  it  up,"  he  said.  "Whatever  you 
do,  don't  stop."  She  reflected  a  little  enviously  that 


410  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

she  could  be  quite  as  happy  running  about  the  deck  with 
Louis  as  pinned  to  the  moth-eaten  music-stool,  grinding 
out  cheap  airs.  Then  she  found  herself  smiling.  Not 
the  least  strange  part  of  this  strange  evening  that  Louis 
should  be  sending  Mrs.  Locke  on  errands,  and  that  Mrs. 
Locke  should  be  going.  The  room  was  filling.  Upon 
the  lady's  reappearance  with  the  banjo  boy  and  the 
cross-eyed  flute-player,  the  concert  was  in  full  swing.  Now 
Mrs.  Locke  was  telling  Hildegarde  to  play  the  "Battle 
Hymn,"  and  presently  several  of  the  men  were  helping 
Miss  Pinckney  to  send  John  Brown's  soul  marching  on. 
Oh,  for  a  little  air!  Surely  there  was  n't  room  for  any 
more  people  in  this  overcrowded  space.  But  still  they 
came.  It  was  curious  to  watch  the  new  faces  at  the  door 
peering  over  the  shoulders  of  those  who  stood  about  the 
piano.  Little  by  little  you  could  see  the  strain  going 
out  of  the  tense  features.  Not  that  their  anxieties  van 
ished,  but  they  were  softened,  humanized  through  the 
humble  agency  of  a  ramshackle  piano  and  an  untrained 
voice  in  a  song.  Even  the  steps,  from  the  very  top  to 
the  bottom  of  the  companionway,  were  crowded  now. 
That  fact  of  itself  made  for  quiescence  on  the  decks. 
People  could  no  longer  run  freely  up  or  down.  While 
they  paused  and  wormed  their  way,  they  were  laid  hold 
of  by  their  ears.  The  little  room  was  packed  to  suffoca 
tion.  Deserted  by  his  audience,  even  Gedge  came  down 
to  see  what  was  up.  Thicker  and  more  stifling  grew  the 
air.  In  a  pause  between  songs  a  scrap  of  conversation 
floated  over  Hildegarde 's  shoulder,  "Lucky  there  's  no 
wind." 

1 1  God,  yes !    If  there  was  wind— 

"Shut  up!" 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  411 

"What  then,  if  there  was  wind—1?"  a  third  insisted, 
barely  audible. 

"Oh,  then,  we  'd  get  off  the  bar."  Clear  enough  to 
one  of  those  for  whose  weaker  sake  the  truth  was  veiled 
— clear  enough  what  the  ironic  comfort  meant.  If  be 
hind  the  ice  were  wind  as  well  as  current,  the  ship 
would  n't  live  an  hour.  Steadily  the  girl  played  on. 
Was  n't  the  onslaught  of  the  ice  heavier  that  last  time? 
Was  the  wind  rising  then  ?  Yes,  surely,  surely,  the  wind 
had  risen.  Well,  one  must  play  the  louder.  But  her 
tranced  eyes  turned  now  right,  now  left.  Some  faces 
clearer  than  others  in  the  haze.  Gedge,  with  his  pasty 
visage  bleached  to  chalk,  and  of  his  cheap  but  heady 
eloquence  never  a  word.  Others  here  that  Hildegarde 
had  seen  night  after  night,  gambling,  drinking,  quarrel 
ing—and  now  .  .  .  ! 

These  rude  fellow-creatures,  little  admirable  as  they 
might  show  themselves  in  happier  hours,  wore  some 
thing  very  like  dignity  to-night.  How  still  they  were! 
It  did  not  escape  Hildegarde  that  all  these  many  pairs  of 
eyes  were  either  lowered  or  fixed  on  space,  as  if  each  one 
forebore  to  read  in  his  fellow's  face  confirmation  of  his 
own  grim  knowledge.  Each  avoiding  the  other's  eyes, 
they  stood  there  listening  to  those  sounds  the  puny  piano 
was  ineffectual  to  drown— the  crash  of  impact  and  the 
yet  more  horrible  crunching,  vicious  and  prolonged,  as 
though  man's  arch-enemy  of  the  deep,  after  battering 
vainly  for  admission,  would  gnaw  his  admission  to  this 
strange  concert  on  the  ice-beleaguered  bar.  While  the 
nerves  of  the  people  still  vibrated  under  the  bombard 
ment,  some  one  started  "Nearer,  my  God,  to  Thee." 
Strangest  of  all  on  that  strange  evening  was  the  revela- 


412  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

tion  that  in  this  particular  company  hardly  one  but 
seemed  to  know  the  hymn,  and  few  that  were  not  singing 
it  with  abandon  to  the  thunderous  bass  of  the  ice.  What 
ever  your  own  thoughts  might  be,  you  read  in  more  than 
one  of  these  faces  that  of  a  certainty  God  was  *  *  nearer ' ' 
this  night  than  He  had  often  been  before.  At  the  be 
ginning  of  the  last  verse,  the  loudest  crash  of  all,  as  if  a 
hundred  tons  of  iron  had  been  hurled  at  the  Los  An 
geles.  The  people,  led  by  one  unfaltering  voice,  kept  on 
singing.  Only  Hildegarde's  flying  fingers  stumbled  as 
the  ship  shrank  and  cowered  under  the  blow.  Had  it 
ended  like  this  for  Galbraith,  too?  Would  he  and  she 
meet  down  there  in  the  kind  sea  caves  ? 

Cheviot's  face  looked  in  through  the  haze.  Of  course 
she  had  known  he  would  come  for  her  at  the  last.  When 
those  firm  lips  opened  she  would  hear  him  saying :  ' '  Stop 
your  playing.  We  Ve  done  what  we  could— you  down 
here,  I  on  deck.  Let  us  go  now  and  meet  the  end. ' '  Oh,  it 
was  well  that  he  was  here!  Through  the  haze  his  face 
swam  nearer,  and  what  he  was  really  saying  was :  ' '  Good 
girl !  If  only  you  can  keep  it  up  a  little  longer ! ' '  And 
with  that  the  face  grew  dim. 

"A  little  longer!"  Faintness,  like  sleep,  stole  over 
the  good  girl.  As  a  peculiar  throbbing  went  through  the 
ship,  Hildegarde  felt  the  hulk  of  the  Los  Angeles  open, 
and  knew  vaguely  that  she  was  falling. 

When  she  opened  her  eyes  Louis  was  lifting  her  up. 
She  was  not  clinging  to  a  berg,  nor  even  sitting  on  a 
cake  of  ice.  Still  in  the  noisome  little  room,  and  still 
that  throbbing  was  shaking  the  ship.  The  people  who 
had  been  so  quiet  were  pushing,  jostling,  shouting,  fran 
tic  to  get—  Where  ?  To  the  boats,  of  course !  All  ex- 


"Nearer,  my  God,  to  Tliee 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  413 

cept  Louis  and  Mrs.  Locke.  Noble  souls,  they  were 
ready  to  stay  and  die  with  Hildegarde  Mar!  She  must 
exert  herself. 

"Now  I  can  go." 

"There  's  no  hurry,"  says  Cheviot. 

"Oh,  yes,  come.    We  must  try— we,  too." 

"Try  what?" 

"Why,  to— to  save  ourselves." 

He  laughed.  "Poor  girl,  do  you  feel  dreadfully  ship 
wrecked  ? ' ' 

"What,  then,  are  they  all  running  for?"  She  looked 
round  bewildered. 

'  *  The  engines  have  started.  Tide  's  nearly  flood.  Can 
you  walk?  That  's  right."  They  helped  her  to  the 
deck.  Long  after  midnight— and  the  world  so  bright! 
Oh,  the  blessing  of  the  pure,  cold  air!  While  she 
breathed  it  in,  O 'Gorman  stopped  to  whisper  in  Che 
viot  's  ear :  "  By  George,  you  've  saved  a  panic ! ' ' 

"No,"  says  Cheviot,  "it  was  n't  my  concert." 


CHAPTER  XXI 

;N  those  last  hours  the  great  body  of  the  floe 
had  swung  away  to  westward.  It  was 
the  very  rear-guard  of  the  outgoing  ice  that 
had  assisted  at  the  concert.  By  this  un 
failing  daylight  you  could  see,  an  hour  after 
midnight,  the  shining  stretch  of  smooth  water  that  lay 
between  the  Los  Angeles  and  the  invisible  mainland. 
People  hung  over  the  ship's  side  to  watch  the  flood-tide 
swirl  and  churn  under  the  propeller,  while  the  "old 
sea  tramp, ' '  mustering  every  pound  of  energy,  struggled 
to  get  free.  Yes,  it  was  exciting  enough,  but  to  the  tall 
girl  bending  her  hatless  head  over  the  railing  at  Che 
viot's  side,  not  half  as  exciting  as  certain  discoveries 
she  was  making  without  the  aid  of  steam.  Not  alone  in 
Norton  Sound  was  the  tide  at  flood.  She  drew  closer  to 
her  companion  with  a  mingled  joy  and  shyness.  Just 
that  little  nearer  drawing,  how  strange  that  it  should 
be  the  stuff  of  which  so  great  happiness  is  made !  Was 
he  feeling  it,  too?  Was  he  realizing?  Or  was  all  his 
soul  down  there  in  the  turgid  water  foaming  under  the 
propeller 's  beat.  She  remembered  enviously  how  Louis 's 
little  nephew  would  pat  you  on  the  arm  if  you  grew 
abstracted,  and  remind  you :  ' '  I  'm  here. ' '  She  longed 
to  do  the  same.  She  even  did  it  in  a  less  direct  fashion 
with  the  words:  "I  should  think,  by  the  feel  of  the  air, 
there  must  be  more  icebergs  on  their  way  down." 

414 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  415 

"Hard  work,"  he  said,  all  his  sympathies  with  the 
propeller. 

' l  Brrr ! ' '  remarked  Hildegarde. 

"Nearly  as  much  mud  as  water,"  he  went  on,  with 
equal  irrelevance. 

"It  certainly  is  a  great  deal  colder,"  she  persisted,  as 
though  he  had  denied  that  fact. 

"Less  than  two  fathoms  at  low  tide— 

"Brrr!    Brrr!" 

Ah,  that  had  brought  him  back.  From  the  overcoat 
he  was  wearing  he  hurriedly  unbuttoned  the  tweed  cape, 
and  when  he  got  it  off  put  it  round  Hildegarde 's  shoulders. 

* '  Are  you  sure  you  won 't  miss  it  ? "  she  asked. 

' '  It  won 't  keep  you  warm  if  it  is  n  't  buttoned. ' '  With 
a  droll  preoccupied  air  and  a  pursed  lip,  less  like  a  lover 
paying  graceful  attentions  to  his  lady  than  like  a  clumsy 
nurse  with  a  small  child  to  look .  after,  Cheviot  labo 
riously  buttoned  up  the  cape.  Only,  a  nurse,  however 
little  skilled,  would  not  have  begun  at  the  bottom,  nor, 
having  at  last  buttoned  her  way  to  the  top,  would  she 
have  so  nearly  buttoned  in  her  charge's  chin.  Hilde 
garde  laughed,  and  considering  she  'd  been  so  short  a 
time  in  the  cape,  grew  miraculously  warm.  To  avoid 
looking  at  Cheviot  she  looked  down  to  see  how  the  pro 
peller  might  be  getting  on. 

"You  must  be  still  just  half  a  minute,  you  know,"  he 
admonished  her,  and  they  found  themselves  laughing 
into  each  other's  eyes. 

"I  ought  to  go  and  get  my  own  things,"  she  said. 
"Brrr!" 

He  took  off  his  arctic  cap  and  dropped  it  on  the 
blonde  head.  "Now  will  you  be  good!"  he  said. 


416  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

They  seemed  to  be  the  only  people  on  the  Los  Angeles 
to  know  a  moment's  intermission  in  the  stark  suspense 
of  hanging  over  the  ship's  side  waiting  for  the  blessed 
moment  that  should  see  them,  by  aid  of  flood  and  steam, 
floated  off  the  bar. 

At  last!  the  throbbing  modified  by  a  new  motion. 
Slowly  the  ship  swayed  fore  and  aft  with  a  faint  seesaw 
ing  effect.  A  great  cheer,  "She  's  off!"  was  cut  short 
by  the  excitement  of  watching  how  the  boast  was  being 
made  good.  Ten  seconds'  breathless  waiting  for  that 
final  pull  out  of  the  mud-trap,  while  idle  muscles  grew 
taut  as  though  to  help  the  ship  in  her  labor,  and  then 
slowly,  unwillingly,  relaxed.  Despair  fell  upon  the 
crowd  as  the  Los  Angeles  grounded  again  more  firmly 
than  before.  In  vain  her  engines  pulled  and  throbbed, 
breathing  into  the  delicate  dawn-flushed  air  inky  bursts 
of  smoke. 

Some  one  called  out,  "She  's  canted  to  starboard," 
and  another  described  the  dilemma  as  "a  righteous 
judgment  for  the  overloading." 

"If  we  're  stuck  here  because  there  's  so  many  of  us 
aboard,  we  can  get  off  for  the  same  reason."  Gedge's 
"brilliant  idear"  was  that  the  people  should  be  massed 
for'ard,  and  then,  upon  a  signal,  should  tear  as  hard  as 
legs  could  carry  them  to  the  other  end  of  the  ship.  The 
sudden  shifting  of  "ballast"  would  work  the  keel  free. 
The  game  was  entered  into  with  immense  spirit.  Any 
one  who,  from  a  balloon,  could  have  looked  down  on  the 
scampering  horde  would  have  taken  the  scene  for  one  of 
frenetic  lunacy.  Whether  by  such  an  effect  as  Gedge 
anticipated,  or  by  some  other  agency,  just  once  the  tall 
mast  swayed  like  some  strong-rooted  pine  in  a  passing 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  417 

breeze.  The  people  shrieked  with  triumph,  and  tore 
madly  back  again  from  stem  to  stern.  But  they  and  the 
engines  and  the  foaming  water  might  rage  as  they  would. 
"The  keel  's  grown  fast  to  the  bottom  of  the  ocean," 
Hildegarde  whispered. 

Louis  turned  and  looked  into  the  face  that  was  so 
close  to  his  own.  "Never  mind—  "  he  began. 

"I  am  never-minding. ' '  She  smiled  back  into  his 
grave  eyes. 

But  he  seemed  to  feel  that,  nevertheless,  she  must  need 
reassuring.  "We  '11  get  off  all  right  somehow." 

"To-morrow?"  she  asked,  quite  without  eagerness. 

"I  don't  know  about  to-morrow."  He  looked  past  his 
companion  at  harassed,  disappointed  faces.  "It  's  a 
plain  case  for  a  little  patience. ' ' 

"  Do  I  strike  you  as  impatient  ? ' ' 

"You  strike  me  as—  He  seemed  to  pull  himself 
up,  and  yet  he  allowed  himself  to  say  it  slowly:  "You 
were  splendid  to-night." 

She  glowed  inwardly.    ' '  Louis ! ' ' 

"Yes."  They  were  leaning  far  over  the  railing  again, 
shoulder  to  shoulder. 

"Louis." 

"Well.    You  got  that  far  before.    What  comes  next  1" 

"I  let  you  say  all  that  about  my  not  needing  you. 
But  if  you  knew  how  I  've  been  blessing  you  for— for 
your  forbearance  with  my  stubbornness  about  coming— 
for  your  forgiveness—" 

"Don't  talk  nonsense." 

"You  are  far  too  good— to  me." 

He  seemed  not  to  feel  the  prick  of  any  point  in  her 
emphasis.  "I  can't  have  you  talking  of  goodness  as  be- 

27 


418  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

tween  you  and  me— it  's  foolishness,"  he  said  lightly. 
Then  as  she  opened  her  lips,  ' '  I  forbid  you  even  to  think 
of  it." 

' '  I  think  of  nothing  else, ' '  she  answered  gently. 

Instead  of  giving  her  proper  credit  for  that,  Louis 
sent  a  wandering  eye  over  his  shoulder.  Actually,  he 
was  making  an  excuse  of  listening  to  that  blatant  Gedge 
bellowing  about  the  * '  damnable  delay. ' ' 

She  looked  at  Cheviot  with  a  frank  perplexity  that 
before  she  knew  it  had  gone  over  into  longing.  Is  he  go 
ing  to  decline  to  make  the  least  little  bit  of  love  to  me 
because  I  'm  away  from  home?  Is  that  the  "sort  o' 
watchman"  he  's  going  to  be?  Oh,  dear! 

"Do  you  know  what  time  it  is?"  The  watchman 
pulled  out  his  watch. 

"I  don't  care  the  very  least  in  the  world  what  time 
it  is." 

"That  's  just  what  always  happens  when  the  sun 
shines  all  night.  It  's  very  demoralizing." 

Demoralizing !  That  after  all  those  hours  of  strain  in 
the  foul  atmosphere  below,  that  she  should  be  willing 
to  stand  here  awhile  in  the  crisp  and  radiant  morning 
talking  to  him;  talking  more  gratefully  than  ever  she 
had  done  in  her  life— "demoralizing!"  He  was  n't 
even  now  attending  to  her.  "Why  do  you  allow  Gedge 
to  bother  you  so?  It  is  n't  like  you,"  she  said.  Still 
he  wore  that  tantalizing  air  of  listening  to  the  orator  on 
the  rope  coil.  ' '  What  difference  can  it  make  to  you  any 
thing  a  man  like  that  may  say  ? ' ' 

"It  might  make  a  difference  to  more  than  me— if  he 
was  n't  looked  after.  I  believe  I  '11  go  and  do  it.  Good 
night,  Good  Girl!" 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  419 

The  couple  of  hours  of  chill  sunshine  after  breakfast 
showed  a  waveless  sea.  Far  off  against  the  eastern  hori 
zon  were  single  icebergs,  that  looked  like  the  white  tents 
pitched  on  the  glassy  surface  of  the  sound. 

To  the  passengers  on  the  grounded  ship  the  calm 
weather  was  only  a  goad  to  rage.  The  rest  of  the  Nome 
fleet— they  were  profiting  by  open  water  and  absence  of 
head  winds!  But  as  for  us  of  the  Los  Angeles,  we  've 
left  our  families,  sold  our  farms,  risked  all  we  have  on 
earth  for  the  pleasure  of  sitting  on  a  sand-bank  a  hun 
dred  and  fifty  miles  from  the  gold-fields ! 

From  hour  to  hour  the  disaffection  spread.  Every 
one  on  board  had  a  remedy  for  the  disaster.  Where  it 
had  been  thought  were  miners,  attorneys,  doctors,  poli 
ticians,  it  turned  out  they  were  navigators  to  a  man. 

No  glimpse  of  Cheviot  till  an  hour  after  breakfast. 
Even  then  only  a  nod  and  ' '  Good-morning, "  as  he  went 
by  deep  in  talk  with  the  chief  engineer.  Toward  ten 
o'clock  a  little  wind  sprang  out  of  the  northeast  and 
brought  down  a  thin  veil  of  fog.  The  air  took  on  a 
keener  edge,  yet  no  one  left  the  deck  or  even  seemed  to 
feel  the  cold,  for  a  rumor  had  run  about  the  ship  like 
fire  over  dry  stubble:  "The  captain  says  we  '11  never 
get  off  this bar  till  we  unload." 

' '  Unload !    Unload  what  1 ' ' 

Pat  the  answer :  ' '  First,  the  coal. ' ' 

1 ' Throw  away  coal!" 

Such  a  counsel  of  despair  struck  grave  enough  on  the 
ears  of  men  who  knew  the  fabulous  sums  paid  in  Nome 
for  fuel.  But  not  the  coal,  it  was  the  little  word  ' '  first ' ' 
that  presented  the  keenest  barb  to  each  man's  conscious 
ness.  Just  as  though  the  immense  sacrifice  of  the  coal 


420  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

were  not  fit  and  sufficient  climax  to  the  misadventure! 
"First!"  What  possible  second?  Why,  after  the  coal, 
overboard  with  McKeown  and  Dingley  and  the  rest  of 
the  heavy  stuff ! 

"Just  let  the  Cap'n  lay  a  finger  on  my  Dingley," 
warned  a  bystander,  black  as  thunder. 

"That  's  what  he  's  figurin'  on,"  Gedge  assured  the 
irate  one.  ' '  And  after  the  machinery ' '  —people  crowded 
aghast  to  hear— "if  we  ain't  light  enough  by  then,  why, 
overboard  with  every  darn  thing  we  got ! " 

"If  he  tries  throwin'  out  our  stuff  he  '11  have  a  riot 
on  his  hands— that  's  all ! " 

Things  began  to  look  black  for  the  captain. 

But  if  he  were  aware  of  the  fact,  it  had  no  effect  on 
his  policy.  Hardly  ten  minutes  later  Gedge  was  obliged 
to  interrupt  the  indignation  meeting  by  calling  out  to  a 
couple  of  blue  China  boys,  struggling  to  get  some  of  the 
lighter  baggage  out  of  the  hold:  "Hi,  you!  Stop  that, 
you  pig-tailed  heathen.  That  's  mine.  Drop  it,  I  say, 
or  I  '11  knock  the  stuffin'  out  o'  you !" 

The  agitated  Celestials  would  have  abandoned  their 
task,  but  for  0  'Gorman 's :  "  Say !  They  're  only  getting 
your  stuff  up  into  a  safe  place  so  they  can  reach  the  coal- 
bunkers.  Here,  put  the  gentleman's  box  over  by  mine." 

In  a  couple  of  hours  the  deck  was  piled  high  with 
miscellaneous  baggage,  and  a  derrick,  hurriedly  rigged, 
was  hauling  up  the  heavier  things  out  of  the  bowels  of 
the  ship.  As  they  came  swinging  out  of  the  darkness 
into  the  chill  gray  light,  people  recognized  their  belong 
ings  with  an  anxiety  hardly  allayed  by  the  temporary 
stowage  of  their  all  upon  the  deck— too  palpably  a  pos 
sible  half-way  station  to  the  bottom  of  the  sea. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  421 

Gedge's  following  was  now  so  great  as  to  be  unwieldy. 
They  blocked  the  narrow  gangway,  they  settled  like  flies 
on  the  freight.  He  drew  off  a  chosen  few,  and  retired 
out  of  the  bitter  wind  to  the  shelter  of  the  smoke-stack 
to  hold  a  private  session. 

"If  that  fellow  had  some  education,"  said  Governor 
Reinhart,  "he  'd  be  helping  to  guide  the  ship  of  state 
at  Washington. ' ' 

"He  seems  likely  to  guide  this  ship  into  trouble 
enough, ' '  Cheviot  answered  crisply. 

' '  What  is  he  doing  now  ? ' '  Hildegarde  asked. 

"He  's—       Reinhart  began  and  hesitated. 

Under  his  breath  0 'Gorman  finished  the  sentence. 
"Trying  to  incite  a  lot  of  fools  to  mutiny. " 

"What  does  he  want  them  to  do?" 

"Put  the  captain  in  irons." 

"What!" 

"And  turn  the  ship  over  to  the  pilot  and  first  officer— 
that  fellow  coming  off  the  bridge  now. ' ' 

Hildegarde  followed  Louis's  eyes  and  saw  they  were 
fixed  not  on  the  dapper  officer  descending,  but  were  on 
the  square  figure  of  the  captain  standing  motionless  on 
the  bridge,  looking  down  at  the  coolies  busy  as  ants 
about  the  hold.  But  he  looked,  not  as  if  he  saw  them. 
The  hard  face  was  red  and  angry.  Hildegarde,  with 
her  genius  for  sympathy,  divined  something  in  it  in 
finitely  miserable,  too.  "How  lonely  the  man  looks," 
she  said  aside  to  Cheviot. 

"You  can't  be  at  the  head  of  things  and  not  be 
lonely." 

The  words  deepened  her  sense  of  commiseration. 
"You  don't  think  he  knows  about  Gedge's  wild  talk?" 


422  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"Oh,  probably." 

'  *  I  wish  he  could  be  reminded  he  has  friends  among 
us  as  well  as  enemies. ' ' 

"I  was  just  going  up,"  Louis  said. 

"Do  you  think  I  might  come?    Just  for  a  moment?" 

"Well,  if  he  fires  you  out  you  are  n't  to  complain." 

' '  Complain  1  No.  But  I  shall  still  believe  it  's  a  pity 
that  men  think  whoever  is  to  know  the  truth  about  a 
danger  or  a  difficulty,  it  must  n't  be  a  woman.  Don't 
you  see  it  would  be  a  gain  to  both  sides  that  we  should 
know?" 

"Nonsense.  It  would  scare  most  women  and  bore 
the  rest.  Besides,  they  'd  be  in  the  way." 

' '  If  that  's  so  it  's  only  because  they  Ve  been  kept  so 
ignorant.  Louis"— the  voice  dropped  softly— "do  you 
know  what  I  Ve  been  thinking  about  often  and  often  ? ' ' 

He  waited  a  moment  before  he  said:  "Since  we  got 
into  the  ice?" 

"Yes." 

"I  suppose  I  do."  But  he  said  it  so  stonily  she 
stopped  half-way  up  the  companionway  and  looked  back 
at  him.  "I  Ve  been  thinking  I  should  never  have  known 
you  if  I  had  n't  come  on  this  journey." 

' '  Oh,  found  me  out,  have  you  ? ' ' 

Hearing  Cheviot's  short  laugh,  Gillies  jerked  his  head 
angrily  over  his  shoulder.  Hildegarde  hesitated  at  the 
top  of  the  companionway.  "It  looks  like  a  dreadful 
breach  of  discipline,"  she  said,  "but  it  is  n't.  You  told 
me  I  might  come  again." 

"In  here,  then,"  said  Gillies  gruffly,  and  took  them  to 
his  room.  He  was  shaking  like  one  in  an  ague,  but  he 
seemed  not  so  ill  pleased  to  see  some  one  from  the  world 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  423 

below.  He  gave  the  girl  a  chair.  "It  's  all  right/'  he 
said.  "Only  it  's  no  good  for  'others  to  see  you  up 
here."  He  fell  into  the  remaining  seat  with  a  heavy 
thud,  and  his  bullet  head  hung  forward.  "Well?"  he 
demanded,  with  a  forced  laugh,  turning  bloodshot  eyes 
on  Cheviot.  Hildegarde  saw  plainer  now  what  an  un 
natural  color  Gillies  was.  Did  the  shivering  and  the 
purple  and  scarlet  stains  mean  a  sickening  for  fever,  or 
only  a  horrible  anxiety  and  an  all-night  watch  in  the 
cold? 

"I  'm  afraid  you  did  n't  get  much  sleep,"  she  began. 

"Not  for  two  nights  now,"  he  said,  and  then  looking 
at  Cheviot :  ' '  This  '11  be  all  over  the  coast,  from  Nome  to 
'Frisco. "  As  he  spoke  the  hard  face  twitched. 

"What  will?"  Cheviot  answered.  "That  the  floods 
have  made  a  new  bar  in  Norton  Sound  this  spring  ? ' ' 

The  captain  uttered  an  inarticulate  sound,  something 
between  a  grunt  and  a  groan.  "First  trip,  too!  Ship 
full  of  damned  newspaper  people.  Land  rats,  starving 
for  a  story."  He  choked,  and  stood  up  stamping  his 
cold  feet,  and  while  he  did  so,  through  the  port  he  forced 
the  sleep-defrauded  eyes  to  reconnoiter  the  sharp,  white 
outline  of  the  distant  icebergs. 

"There  are  people  on  board  who  '11  get  the  story 
right,"  said  Hildegarde. 

"Oh,  I  don't  care!  Let  'em  say  what  they  like— if 
only  the  wind  does  n  't  bring  the  floe  down  on  us  again. ' ' 
Cheviot  made  a  move  as  if  to  go.  "The  trouble  is," 
said  Gillies,  "I  'm  short  of  hands.  However  hard  they 
keep  at  it  those  China  boys  can't  shift  five  hundred  tons 
of  coal  before  the  tide  's  flood. ' ' 

"Well,  you  've  got  a  lot  of  white  men  on  board—" 


424  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"Yes,"  growled  the  captain,  "and  a  lot  of  help  I  '11 
get  out  of  them. ' ' 

"What  I  came  up  for"— Cheviot  drew  nearer— "was 
really  to  tell  you  there  are  men  on  board  this  ship  who 
propose  to  stand  by  you. ' ' 

Gillies,  leaning  against  the  locker,  neither  said  nor 
looked  a  syllable  of  thanks.  Never  even  took. his  blood 
shot  eyes  off  the  ice  line.  But  the  hard  face  twitched 
again.  A  sense  of  the  devouring  anxiety  he  was  obviously 
laboring  under  made  the  girl  quick  to  relieve  him  of  any 
added  strain  or  restraint  that  he  might  feel  in  an  un 
familiar  presence  at  such  a  crisis.  Even  Louis  might  be 
thinking  "a  woman  was  in  the  way."  She  stood  up, 
murmuring  an  excuse  for  going. 

The  captain,  unheeding,  went  on  in  that  hoarse,  muf 
fled  voice :  "  I  've  just  sent  an  officer  below  to  see  if  I  can 
get  some  volunteers. ' ' 

' '  What  officer  ? ' '  said  Cheviot.    ' '  Not  the  first  ? ' ' 

"Why  not?  Yes,  the  first."  And  there  was  a  silence 
so  significant  that  Hildegarde  was  glad  she  had  not 
waited  for  that  to  tell  her  she  should  leave  the  men  to 
themselves.  But  at  the  threshold  she  had  to  stand  back 
an  instant  to  let  the  cabin-boy  pass.  As  he  was  in  the 
act  of  darting  in  with  some  food,  the  wind  whisked  a 
paper  napkin  off  the  tray.  He  stooped  in  the  doorway, 
clutched  after  the  elusive  object  with  skinny,  yellow 
fingers,  and  as  he  did  so  the  soup  slid  off  the  tray  and 
cascaded  over  the  threshold. 

The  captain  swore,  and  the  China  boy  gabbled  as  he 
mopped  wildly  with  the  ineffectual  paper  napkin.  "God 
forgive  me  if  ever  I  go  to  sea  again  with  a  lot  of  damned 
Chinamen.  I  'd  have  tried  kedging  before  this,  if  I  had 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  425 

a  crew  that  could  understand  anything  but  routine 
orders.  As  it  is  I  '11  be  lucky  if  I  get  the  coal  out  in 
time." 

"I  can't  promise  you  sailors,  but  say  the  word,  and 
I  '11  get  you  some  sort  of  volunteers.  How  many  ? ' ' 

"Well,  just  to  get  the  coal  overboard  we  '11  need  two 
or  three  shifts.  And  if  I  have  to  kedge,  after  all— it  's 
no  fun !— but  with  eight  good  men  I  could  do  it." 

"I  '11  undertake  to  get  you  the  best  twenty  on  the 
ship,  and  you  can  hold  a  dozen  in  reserve." 

As  the  girl,  at  last  able  to  get  out  dryshod,  was  going 
down  the  companionway,  a  bird's-eye  view  of  the  upper 
deck  gave  fresh  meaning  to  the  scrap  of  conversation  she 
had  just  heard.  Out  of  the  black  square  of  the  hold  the 
blue-cotton  coolies  crawled  up  the  ladder  with  vast  bur 
dens  to  add  to  the  chaos  of  trunks,  crates,  and  machinery, 
piled  already  so  perilously  high  about  the  deck,  and  leav 
ing  so  narrow  a  gangway  for  people  to  crowd  through 
that  the  able-bodied  swarmed  over  the  obstructions. 

There  was  Mrs.  Locke  reading  in  a  sheltered  nook, 
walled  in  by  towering  crates,  and  just  the  other  side,  to 
leeward  of  the  smoke-stack,  Gedge,  in  close  conclave  with 
his  body-guard. 

When  Hildegarde,  with  some  difficulty,  reached  Mrs0 
Locke,  that  lady  held  up  her  hand  for  silence,  but,  be 
hold,  she  was  n't  reading  at  all.  As  the  girl  sank  quietly 
down,  Gedge 's  voice  reached  her  clear,  although  it  was 
lifted  with  more  than  common  caution.  For  ten,  fifteen, 
twenty  minutes  he  must  have  gone  on  airing  his  seditious 
notions;  when  Mrs.  Locke,  half  rising,  whispered,  "I£ 
there  's  nobody  else  I  think  I  must  go  round  and  talk  to 
those  men  myself. ' ' 


426  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

Just  then  a  sound  of  some  one  flying  over  the  crates 
on  the  wings  of  haste,  and  Cheviot 's  voice :  '  *  Gedge,  are 
you  there  ? ' ' 

"You  bet  I  'm  here,"  was  the  surly  answer.  "And 
not  likely  to  get  away  in  a  hurry,  so  far  's  I  see. ' ' 

' '  Well,  that  's  in  our  own  hands. ' ' 

"Just  what  I  've  been  tellin'  the  boys."  But  there 
was  a  challenge  in  the  voice. 

' '  Your  head  's  level, ' '  said  Cheviot. 

"Oh,  you  're  gettin'  tired,  too!  Comin'  round,  are 
you?" 

"I  Ve  had  about  enough  of  this  sitting  on  the  bar,  if 
that  's  what  you  mean. ' ' 

' '  Then  why  don 't  we  do  something  1 ' ' 

"Just  what  I  was  going  to  propose,"  said  Cheviot 
briskly.  "Trouble  is  there  are  n't  enough  hands  to  get 
the  coal  out  before—'1 

"Oh,  yes,  we  know  that  's  his  excuse." 

"His?  It  's  yours  and  mine.  And  a  pretty  lame  ex 
cuse,  too." 

"Was  it  you,"  demanded  Gedge  truculently,  "that 
put  it  into  his  empty  cocoanut  to  ask  us  to  lend  a  hand 
at  pitchin '  our  own  stuff  overboard  ? ' ' 

"At  present  it  's  a  question  of  pitching  out  other 
fellows'  coal."  Then  lower:  "See  here,  Gedge,  I  want 
two  words  with  you. ' ' 

"No  you  don't.  None  of  us  did  n't  come  up  here  for 
'  words. '  No,  nor  to  try  and  patch  up  the  captain 's  mis 
takes  by  turnin'  ourselves  into  beasts  o'  burden."  Che 
viot  lowered  his  voice  and  argued  a  moment  or  two, 
Gedge  bursting  in  with  remarks  intended  to  assure  his 
satellites  that  he  was  n't  being  "got  at."  But  Cheviot 
pressed  him  hard. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  427 

"Well,  I  '11  tell  you  what  we  '11  do.  If  we  ain't  goin' 
to  get  out  of  this  fix  without  we  turn  to  and  help  that 
fool  captain— tell  you  what  we  '11  do,  boys.  If  we  got 
to  work,  we  '11  work  for  Nome  wages.  Hey,  boys  ?  Ten 
dollars  an  hour. ' ' 

1 '  Oh,  see  here ! ' '  said  Cheviot,  '  *  the  captain  can 't  play 
up  to  that  lead." 

' '  Any  feller, ' '  shouted  Gedge,  ' l  that  works  for  a  penny 
less  'n  ten  dollars  an  hour  is  lowerin'  the  market.  He  's 
an  enemy  to  society.  He  's  a— 

"He  's  simply  a  fellow  with  a  notion  he  'd  like  to  get 
to  Nome.  I  thought  you  were  a  pretty  sharp  customer, 
Gedge,  but  you  're  just  an  everyday  sort  of  ass  after 
all."  With  which  Cheviot  climbed  back  over  the  crates 
whistling,  as  though  his  momentary  concern  were  at  an 
end. 

"Hello!"  0 'Gorman  called  out.  Cheviot  turned 
aside,  when  he  caught  sight  of  the  giant  towering  over 
the  nook  where  the  two  women  sat  out  of  the  wind. 

"What  luck?"  said  0 'Gorman,  under  his  breath. 

"Four.    And  you  1" 

"Only  two."  0 'Gorman  motioned  with  his  head  to 
ward  the  smoke-stack,  and  lowered  his  voice  to  a  whis 
per  :  "  He  's  got  hold  of  an  awful  lot  of  the  men. ' ' 

Cheviot  nodded.  "Yes.  We  're  up  against  that  fel 
low  everywhere  we  turn. ' ' 

"Always  two  leaders  in  every  crowd,"  0 'Gorman 
said.  "One  to  lead  up,  t'  other  to  lead  down.  I  'm 
ready  to  bet  on  you ! ' ' 

They  talked  in  undertones.  Only  Gedge  could  be 
heard  distinctly.  He  was  growing  hoarse.  His  increas 
ing  audience  was  taking  on  the  proportions  of  a  mass 
meeting.  But  the  voice  of  the  popular  leader  was  show- 


428  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

ing  wear.  He  ended  his  oration  with  some  abruptness. 
"Come  along,  Joslin.  Let  's  go  and  licker  up," 

"Now!  Nail  him  now.!"  whispered  Cheviot,  and 
vaulting  over  a  prodigious  pile  of  machinery  he  disap 
peared  with  Blumpitty  and  several  others  into  the  hold, 
while  0 'Gorman  darted  out  in  the  opposite  direction 
just  in  time  to  intercept  Gedge  and  Joslin. 

"There  's  got  to  be  two  shifts.  You  fellows  comin'  to 
help?" 

"Help!"  Gedge  rolled  out  a  brace  of  handsome 
oaths.  "Help!  that  —  captain?" 

"No,  help  us,  help  yourselves  out  of  this  fix."  Then, 
before  Gedge  could  get  a  word  of  disclaimer  over  his 
lips:  "I  hear  you  are  worrying  about  wages.  But  this 
is  n't  a  question  of  money.  Lives  are  at  stake.  See  that 
ice  over  yonder  ?  And  look  here,  I  've  got  more  on  board 
this  ship  than  any  other  one  man.  Fifteen  thousand 
dollars  Is  what  the  freight  alone  has  cost  me.  But  to 
save  your  life"— he  took  hold  of  Gedge 's  arm— "to  save 
your  life,  every  ounce  of  mine  may  go  overboard,  and 
I  '11  help  shift  it  at  nothing  an  hour. ' ' 

Gedge  looked  round  rather  sheepishly,  as  if  he  did  n  't 
know  the  answer  to  this.  But  suddenly  ane  occurred  to 
him.  "I  'm  from  Missoura,"  he  said.  "You  got  to 
show  me.  That  other  feller,  too,  the  one  that  was  givin' 
me  such  a  lot  of  hot  air  little  while  ago,  why  ain't  you 
an 'him-" 

"You  come  along  with  me.  I  '11  'show'  you." 
0 'Gorman  carried  the  ringleader  and  Joslin  down  into 
the  hold.  Two  hours  later  Hildegarde,  peering  over  the 
edge  of  the  square  pit,  saw  among  the  group  engaged  in 
shoveling  coal,  Gedge,  with  the  face  of  a  blackamoor  and 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  429 

the  sweat  pouring  down.  His  surplus  energy  was  at  last 
being  utilized. 

Three  hundred  and  fifty  tons  were  flung  overboard 
before  the  tide  was  flood;  and  again  at  midnight  the 
muddy  water  was  set  boiling,  and  the  big  yellow  stack 
belched  out  clouds  of  smoke.  The  stranded  ship  moved  a 
little,  heavily,  grudgingly,  like  a  monster  half  awakened, 
and  then  settled  down  to  finish  a  second  night  on  the  bar. 

The  captain  was  not  the  only  man  who  did  n't  sleep. 
More  than  one  "sort  o'  watchman"  showed  signs  of 
strain,  the  next  morning.  For  the  fog  was  thicker  than 
the  day  before,  the  wind  veering  and  no  assurance  how 
far  away  the  ice.  It  was  partly  the  fever  of  anxiety 
that  found  vent  in  sneers,  hardly  to  be  called  covert, 
when  it  was  known  the  captain  meant  to  take  steps  to 
free  the  ship  that  afternoon. 

'  *  That  glass-eyed  idiot  don 't  even  yet  know  there  ain  't 
but  one  tide  in  this  part  of  the  world,  and  that  one  's 
near  midnight ! ' '  was  the  discarded  pilot 's  contribution. 
That  Gillies  was  prepared  for  the  eccentricities  of  north 
ern  tides  was  credited  by  few. 

Open  jeers  followed  his  putting  off  in  a  small  boat, 
with  the  second  officer,  to  sound  for  deep  water. 
"What  's  the  good  of  deeper  water  a  hundred  yards 
from  the  ship  ? ' ' 

The  possible  good  appeared  upon  the  captain 's  return. 
The  anchor  that  the  small  boat  was  to  carry  back  (with 
buoys  to  mark  the  place  selected)  looked  big  enough  to 
landsmen's  eyes,  till  they  saw  the  lowering  of  the  one  to 
be  lashed  underneath  the  long  boat.  This  mighty  two- 
and-a-half -ton  iron-grappler,  so  the  rumor  ran,  was  to 
be  used  to  "kedge"  the  steamer  off  the  bar. 


430  COME  AND  FIND  ME' 

But  where  were  the  sailors  coming  from  to  man  a  boat 
of  this  size,  let  alone  to  carry  out  successfully  so  ticklish 
an  affair? 

"It  's  all  right,"  Cheviot  had  said. 

Just  how  it  had  been  made  "right"  did  n't  appear. 
There  was  no  oratory,  no  public  appeal.  But  three  times 
as  many  as  the  captain  wanted  were  offering  to  go  out 
in  the  fog  and  plant  the  great  anchor  in  the  choppy  sea. 

"I— me.  You  haf  bromise  I  shall  go!  Not?"  A 
great  muscular  German  was  squeezing  his  way  to  Che 
viot's  side. 

"All  right.  No  hurry.  They  '11  be  a  while  yet,  get 
ting  those  buoys  right. ' ' 

The  general  attention  was  riveted  to  the  second  boat 
hanging  high  over  the  monster  anchor  that  was  destined 
to  be  bound  lengthwise  along  the  keel.  How  was  any 
craft  to  make  her  way  mounted  in  so  strange  a  fashion? 
How  could  anybody  hope  it  would  n't  sink? 

"No,  the  weight  will  be  too  well  distributed,"  Cheviot 
had  said. 

"Yes,  till  you  start  lay  in'  the  anchor  out  yonder,"  the 
pilot  commented  darkly. 

Hildegarde  made  a  sign  to  Cheviot.  He  came  to  her 
across  the  chain  barrier,  newly  established  to  keep  back 
the  crowd. 

Before  the  girl  could  speak,  "Those  heavy  ropes, " 
said  Mrs.  Locke,  "that  are  to  lash  the  big  anchor  along 
the  bottom  of  the  boat,  how  will  you  ever  get  them  un 
done  out  there  in  the  choppy  water  ? ' ' 

"Cut  them,"  answered  Cheviot  shortly.  "What  did 
you  want,  Hildegarde  ? ' ' 

She  looked  at  him  appealingly,  and  then,  as  though 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  431 

abandoning  some  quite  different  point,  "My  Blumpitty 
is  very  sore  that  you  are  taking  the  big  German  instead 
of  him." 

" Can't  help  that." 

"Why  did  n't  you  want  Blumpitty?" 

"Too  old." 

' '  Why,  he  's  only  forty  something. ' ' 

"We  Ve  got  to  have  young  men  for  this  job." 

' '  Then  you  think  it  's  very— ' ' 

"  No. "  Cheviot  cut  her  short.  ' '  Not  if  the  right  men 
are  doing  it— a  mere  matter  of  precision,"  and  he  was 
going  back. 

But  Mrs.  Locke  kept  him  yet  a  moment.  "I  Ve  just 
heard  if  one  of  those  ropes  is  cut  the  fraction  of  a  second 
before  the  others  the  boat  '11  be  dragged  under  ? ' ' 

"It  's  got  to  be  done  simultaneously,  of  course,  on  a 
signal,"  he  answered  quietly.  "I  Ve  just  been  explain 
ing  to  Hildegarde  it  is  n  't  a  job  for  bunglers. ' ' 

' '  They  say  it  ought  n 't  to  be  attempted  unless  by  a  dis 
ciplined  crew. ' ' 

"But  there  is  n't  any  disciplined  crew,"— he  was  in 
the  act  of  stepping  across  the  chain— "and  there  is  n't 
any  other  way  of  getting  off  the  bar. ' ' 

"There  are  other  men/'  said  Mrs.  Locke,  quite  low. 

"Oh,  plenty,"  and  he  was  on  the  other  side.  But  so 
was  Hildegarde. 

"You  are  n't  allowed  over  here,"  Cheviot  said.  She 
was  looking  up  at  the  captain  and  making  him  a  little 
signal  for  permission.  He  nodded,  and  without  a  word 
to  Cheviot  she  went  up  to  Gillies  on  the  bridge.  In  a 
few  minutes  she  came  down  again,  but  instead  of  joining 
the  passengers  on  the  other  side  of  the  chain,  she  made 


432  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

her  way  to  where,  a  little  apart  from  the  group  of  volun 
teers,  Cheviot  stood  watching  the  small  boat  which, 
manned  by  the  first  officer,  0 'Gorman,  and  two  others, 
was  bobbing  about  dimly  on  the  roughened  water. 

Just  as  Louis  caught  sight  of  her  one  of  the  volunteers 
stepped  between  them.  "What  makes  those  fellows  so 
devilish  slow  9" 

"Doing  the  best  they  can,"  said  Cheviot,  with  an  air 
of  not  meaning  to  notice  the  girl. 

"No,  they  are  n't  doing  the  best  they  can.  They 
are  n  't  even  getting  our  boat  lowered. ' ' 

"They  've  had  to  knock  off  work  a  minute.  The 
wind  's  playing  the  mischief  with  the  head-sails. ' ' 

' '  Yes,  and  if  we  don 't  look  sharp  the  wind  '11  play  the 
mischief  with  more  than  the  head-sails. ' ' 

The  volunteer  looked  across  Cheviot's  shoulder  an  in 
stant  into  the  thicker  fog.  Through  that  veil  no  man 
might  yet  discover  if  the  ice  were  being  driven  back 
against  the  bar,  but  all  could  feel  that  the  need  for  quick 
action  might  be  greater  than  the  fog  would  let  them  see. 

The  instant  the  volunteer  went  back  to  the  waiting 
group,  Hildegarde  drew  close  to  the  solitary  figure  at  the 
railing.  "Louis!" 

Whether  at  something  new  in  the  girl's  low  voice,  or 
at  a  simultaneous  shrill  dissonance  in  the  thick,  chill  air, 
Cheviot  started  and  looked  round.  "Oh,  it  's  those 
Chinamen ! "  he  said,  his  eyes  on  the  blue-cotton  crew 
hauling  at  a  rope  with  a  kind  of  wicked  hilarity  as  they 
sang  their  barbaric,  disquieting  chant. 

But  it  was  a  new  experience  to  find  that  anything 
could  get  on  Louis 's  nerves ! 

"Is  it  true  you  've  been  up  all  night?"  Hildegarde 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  433 

said  hurriedly,  scanning  his  face.  He  nodded,  and 
turned  seaward  again  to  watch  the  little  boat  planting 
out  bright-colored  buoys  in  the  mist. 

"Louis,  the  captain  says  I  may  speak  to  you.  Only 
five  minutes,  so  we  must  n  't  waste  time  pretending.  It  's 
dangerous  what  you  mean  to  do.  Oh,  don 't  be  afraid ! 
I  'm  not  going  to  try  to  prevent  your  going.  Only,  if 
you  don't  come  back,  Louis"— her  voice  fell— "I  shan't 
know  how  to  go  on  living. ' ' 

For  a  moment  he  made  no  answer,  and  then,  with  his 
eyes  still  on  the  dim  boat  dancing  in  the  mist :  "You  're 
only  rather  frightened,"  he  said.  "Wait  till  all  this 
has  gone  by. ' ' 

"Ah,  can't  you  see?  Why  is  it  so  hard  for  you  to  be 
lieve?" 

"Because,"  he  said  very  low,  "I  know  if  I  did,  it 
would  be  the  signal  for  the  old  barrier  to  rise  up  again." 

' '  What  barrier  ?    You  are  n 't  thinking— ' ' 

"I  'm  thinking  this  is  n't  the  place  for  you  to—"  He 
checked  himself. 

"For  me  to  do  what?" 

uTo  get  rid  of  your  old—  Again  he  stopped,  and 
then,  with  an  effect  of  rather  bitter  patience,  ' '  Of  course 
for  you  he  's  the  dominating  thought  up  here  among  the 
ice." 

"No!" 

"Do  you  mean  to  say  he  has  n't  been  in  your  mind  a 
hundred  times  ?  Continually  ? ' ' 

"Not  continually,  because—" 

"Well,  a  hundred  remembrances  would  satisfy  most 
men,"  he  said. 

"Would  it  satisfy  you,  Louis?" 

28 


434  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"No,  I  should  want  all,  and  I  know  there  's  no  chance 
of  getting  all  here. ' ' 

"I  suppose  this  is  n't  the  time  for  me  to  tell  you— 

He  turned  on  her  almost  roughly.  "You  can't  sup 
pose  I  need  to  be  told  what  was  in  your  mind  when  we 
got  caught  in  the  ice  ?  And  when  that  first  ship  showed 
on  the  horizon—  He  stopped  again,  and  turned  away 
as  one  who  has  said  all. 

"You"— the  mere  suggestion  took  away  her  breath — 
"you  did  n't  think  it  might  be— 

"You  did." 

"No,  no.  I  knew,  dead  or  alive,  he  was  on  the  other 
side  of  the  world.  Or,  at  nearest,  in  California." 

' '  I  don 't  tempt  him  by  being  sure. ' '  The  rigid  line  of 
his  lips  looked  less  like  firmness  than  an  effort  at  control. 
"If  I  were  to  be  sure  again,  especially  here,  the  fog 
there  would  open  and  a  ship  come  sailing  through.  And 
it  would  be  his  ship.  And  in  a  moment  your  ship,  too. ' ' 

"Don't  you  know  for  him  to  be  up  here  is  physically 
impossible,  even  if  he  's  alive?" 

Cheviot  shook  his  head.  "There  are  some  men— even 
their  ghosts  can  fight  their  battles.  His  did,  once  be 
fore." 

' '  I  could  never  have  believed  you  were  superstitious. ' ' 

"May  n't  I  have  even  that  much  imagination?" 

"You  've  forgotten  it  was  all  just  a  dream  of  mine. 
Why"— she  could  n't  help  giving  out  a  little  miserable 
laugh— "you  've  forgotten,  just  as  I  used  to,  that  I  've 
never  seen  him  ? ' ' 

"I  remember  I  used  to  wish  you  had." 

"Well,  there  's  one  thing  you  can't  remember,  be 
cause  you  never  knew  it.  And  that  is  that  I  had  never 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  435 

seen  you  in  the  Valdivia  days.  It  was  partly  my  fault, 
but  not  altogether.  Men's  lives  are  so  hidden  from  girls. 
How  is  it  possible  for  us  to  know  them?  We  never  see 
them  doing  things  that  are  worth  while.  We  have  n't 
a  notion  what  they  're  like  when  they  're  at  work. 
Only,  about  one  man's  work  I  used  to  think  I  knew.  Of 
course  I  did  n't,  but  just  to  imagine  it  was  something. 
I  was  the  kind  of  girl  who  is  n't  ambitious  for  herself. 
But  for  the  man  she-  The  reason  that  old  ' obsession,' 
as  you  called  it,  took  such  hold  of  me,  was  that  there  was 
a  man  who  was  'doing  things'!  I  'd  heard  all  my  life 
about  the  things  he  'd  done  and  the  things  he  meant  to 
do.  They  seemed  already  made  immortal  in  a  book.  But 
now  I  've  seen  it  is  n't  only  he—  " 

The  contrast  in  achievement  cut  too  cruelly.  Cheviot 
struck  the  damp  railing  with  his  open  palm,  and  laughed 
out  loud. 

Though   his   action    dashed   her   into   trembling   she 
drew  closer,  she  pressed  against  his  arm.    "Besides,  I  Ve 
come  at  last  to  care  for  some  one  in  the  only  true  way— 
quite  apart  from  anything  he  may  do.     I— I  love  you 
Louis." 

^  The  look  he  turned  upon  her  was  very  beautiful  to  the 
girl.  As  his  hand  moved  toward  her  along  the  railing, 
under  cover  of  the  cape,  her  own  slipped  into  it. 

The  wild  chant  of  the  Chinamen  abruptly  ended,  and 
now  that  nearer,  more  intelligible  sound,  the  creaking 
of  the  falls  as  the  long  boat  sank  from  the  davits  to  the 
sea. 

Cheviot,  with  an  effort,  turned  his  eyes  away  from  the 
girl's  face.  Together  they  watched  the  boat  floated  over 
the  great  anchor  that  was  suspended  lengthwise  a  little 


436  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

under  the  surface  of  the  water ;  together  saw  the  binding 
fast  of  the  anchor  to  the  boat.  And  now  the  two  made 
one  were  ready.  Cheviot  took  off  his  overcoat  and  flung 
it  over  the  railing.  ' '  Will  you  have  an  eye  to  that  ? ' ' 

Her  heart  was  beating  painfully.  ' '  Do  you  think  I  '11 
have  an  eye  to  spare  ? ' ' 

"Well,  keep  this  in  your  pocket  then."  He  took  off 
his  watch.  "And  here  's  this."  He  put  a  little  leather 
case  in  her  hand,  smiling  and  saying  hurriedly,  under 
his  breath:  "With  all  my  worldly  goods  I  thee  endow." 
Then  facing  about  he  signaled  to  his  volunteers. 

In  the  undisciplined  fashion  of  her  sex,  Hildegarde, 
forgetting  to  go  back  behind  the  barrier,  stood  at  gaze. 
Cheviot,  carrying  with  him  something  quick  and  quiver 
ing  out  of  the  heart  of  the  girl  (something  that  kept  her 
linked  to  him  not  by  eye  and  mind  alone,  but  as  by  a 
bond  that  established  oneness  of  the  very  flesh,  faithfully 
reporting  effort  and  transmitting  feeling) ,  he  disappeared 
over  the  ship's  side  after  the  officer,  followed  by  the  six 
volunteers.  With  steady  eyes  the  girl  watched  the  buf 
feting  of  the  heavy-weighted  boat,  and  watched  the  fog 
blur  it  till  it  looked  like  something  seen  in  a«dream.  Che 
viot  at  the  bow,  by  the  uniformed  figure,  less  distinct 
both  of  them  than  the  big  German  with  his  blaek-and- 
yellow  cap  at  the  stern. 

Now  the  "kedgers"  were  passing  the  small  boat,  and 
now  they  had  gained  the  buoys.  Hildegarde  saw  the 
officer  turn,  and  knew  he  was  giving  some  direction. 
Now  they  were  trying  to  steady  the  pitching  boat  di 
rectly  over  the  selected  site,  shown  by  a  buoy  faintly 
vermilion,  bobbing  to  right  and  to  left. 

No  easy  affair  to  keep  the  boat  there  long  enough  to 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  437 

plant  the  great  anchor.  The  officer  stood  up,  and  in  a 
sudden  lurch  all  but  capsized,  steadied  himself  and 
seemed  to  wait.  There  was  a  shipping  of  oars;  the  pic 
ture  danced  and  then  dissolved. 

No,  no,  there  it  was!  But  what  had  happened,  why 
did  it  look  so  strange?  The  men!  there  was  n't  one  in 
the  boat.  And  so  many  dim  buoys— no,  heads!  Lord, 
Lord,  have  mercy!  The  boat  was  turned  completely 
over  and  drowning  men  were  clinging  to  the  keel.  Were 
they  all  there !  Which  was  Louis?  One  could  n't  even 
count,  for  the  waves  would  wash  over  a  man  and  wipe 
him  out.  A  moment,  and  there  he  was  again!  That, 
that  was  Louis!  Could  he  keep  hold  on  the  plunging 
keel  ?  (Lord  God,  be  kind !)  But  he  seemed  not  to  have 
been  washed  away.  He  was  swimming  to  the  place 
where  a  man  had  been  and  was  no  more.  Now  Louis  had 
hold  of  him.  And  there  was  the  other  boat— the  little 
one,  as  though  she  'd  dropped  from  the  skies,  or  risen 
from  the  bed  of  the  ocean ;  and  she  was  taking  a  man  on 
board !  Not  Louis,  but  the  one  who  had  once  gone  down — 
the  huge  German.  Two  men !  Three  were  hauled  in.  Not 
one  of  them  Louis!  He  kept  a  hand  on  the  gunwale 
of  the  overcrowded  little  boat,  and  swam  with  it  toward 
the  buoys.  Why  was  he  and  those  others  still  struggling 
in  the  water,  what  were  they  trying  to  do?  To  right 
the  long  boat  ?  Oh,  let  it  alone  and  come  back ! 

After  endless  moments,  Louis  and  the  rest,  with  the 
help  of  the  men  in  the  small  boat,  had  got  the  other  right 
side  up  again.  Now  both  crews  were  coming  back. 

When  at  last  in  a  shower  of  cheers,  Cheviot,  the  last 
of  the  volunteers,  climbed  the  swinging  ladder  and 
smiled  up  at  the  face  bending  over— not  till  then  did 


438  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

it  seem  to  Hildegarde  that  the  something  he  had  taken 
away  was  restored  to  her,  and  her  body  and  her  soul 
made  whole  again. 

The  people  broke  through  the  barrier  and  pressed 
round  the  dripping  figures,  hurrahing  too  loud  at  first 
to  hear  how  everything  was  "all  right  now."  They  'd 
got  the  anchor  where  they  wanted  it,  and  they  had  n't 
lost  an  inch  of  cable,  and  had  got  a  ducking  only  be 
cause  a  few  strands  of  the  confounded  rope  hung  up 
the  falling  anchor  a  fraction  of  a  second  longer  on  one 
side  than  on  the  other. 

Very  quickly  Cheviot  seemed  to  have  enough  of  public 
enthusiasm.  "You  might  just  let  us  by,  so  we  can  get 
into  dry  things."  But  the  horde  pressed  closer.  How 
was  this,  and  how  was  that?  And  how  the  onlookers 
felt  in  that  awful  moment  when  the  boat  capsized.  In 
vain  Cheviot  assured  them,  "Nobody  's  a  penny  the 
worse,  and  the  kedging  can  begin  as  soon  as  the  tide 
comes  in."  Nobody  the  worse?  Yes,  one  man  was. 
Since  he  could  n't  get  away,  Cheviot  created  a  diversion 
by  laughing  at  the  wet  and  angry  German,  who  stood 
outside  the  press,  oblivious  of  other  people's  excitement, 
his  own  face  working  with  emotion,  stretching  out  his 
arms  and  apostrophizing  his  black-and-yellow  cap  that 
floated  like  some  gay  sea-bird  on  the  troubled  waters. 
He  appealed  to  the  officer  to  let  him  go  back  in  the 
small  boat  and  rescue  the  precious  object. 

"You  'd  better  go  and  get  dry,  Guggenheim,  for  the 
sake  of  your  family,"  Cheviot  called  out,  and  then  to 
those  nearest,  "You  talk  about  grit.  I  tell  you  we  had 
one  hero  in  our  crew  and  one  fool,  and  both  together 
made  one  large-sized  Dutchman." 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  439 

That  fellow  vo1- 


unteered  without  being  able  to  swim! 


S  wid  a  baby.    You  vill  know  me,'  he  says,    from 

M  AsaCheviot  at  last  pushed  his  way  out  of  the  crush, 
Hifdegarde,  close  in  his  wake,  still  carrying  the  over 
coat   followed  him  down  the  compamonway     Near  t 
deserted  music-room  door  she  slipped  ^  hand  -  J, 

"I  'm  too  wet  for  you  to  come  near. 
said  nothing  of  the  sort,  and  dripping  as  he  was,  he  had 


her  in  his  arms. 


CHAPTER  XXII 

'ATE  the  next  evening,  standing  with  Louis 
and  Captain  Gillies  on  the  bridge,  Hilde- 
garde  saw  ships  on  the  western  horizon. 
The  fleet  at  last!  anchored  two  miles  off 
from  Nome.  It  was  bedtime,  but  quite  im 
possible  to  sleep,  though  there  would  be  no  landing  till 
next  day.  They  said  "Good-night"  to  the  captain,  and 
found  their  way  to  a  corner  of  the  deck,  where  alone 
together  they  might  see  the  belated  sun  setting,  and 
watch  a  pale-gold  moon  of  enormous  size  riding  porten 
tously  the  clear-colored  sky,  too  bright  for  stars.  Hand 
in  hand,  hidden  among  the  freight,  they  talked  of  the 
future,  arranging  it  in  the  high  fashion  of  the  young, 
as  though  they  two  had  been  gods  seated  on  Olympus. 
And  as  they  talked  the  faint  flush  over  yonder  turned 
the  purest  rose,  then  deepened  as  each  beautiful  moment 
sped,  till  the  sun,  gone  but  now,  hastened  back  like  one 
who  abandons  a  projected  journey,  and  on  the  heels  of 
his  good-by  comes  shamefaced  home.  What  would  it  be 
like,  this  day  that  he  was  bringing?  What  was  waiting 
over  yonder  in  that  mysterious  land,  still  in  shadow, 
that  skirts  the  hills  of  Nome?  Just  a  little  longer  the 
weary  passengers  hung  about  the  decks,  while  the  blood- 
red  sun  peered  at  them  over  a  violet  sea,  ready,  when  the 
shadow-curtain  lifted,  to  clothe  the  naked  truth  of 
Nome  with  a  final  splendor.  Whatever  might  come 

440 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  441 

after,  in  this  first  actual  vision  of  the  place  people  had 
fared  so  far  to  find,  it  was  to  wear  the  hues  of  heaven. 
For  the  "boat-load  of  failure,"  the  dream  they  had 
called  * '  Nome ' '  was  to  die  in  a  glory  of  gold  and  fire. 

The  decks  that  had  swarmed  with  excited  people  were 
falling  silent.  Men  and  women,  whose  whole  lives  hung 
upon  what  they  should  find  waiting  for  them  yonder, 
must  be  in  bed  betimes,  that  they  might  be  ready  to  go 
ashore  in  the  first  boat.  Soon  only  Hildegarde  and  Che 
viot  remained.  But  they  were  silent,  watching  all  those 
w^hite  sails  turn  pink  against  the  purple  distance — sea 
and  sky  alike  dyed  deep,  and  still  the  honey-colored 
moon  hanging  there,  immense,  unreal.  Whichever  way 
they  looked,  this  northern  world  was  like  something 
seen  in  a  dream,  spectral,  uncanny,  fitly  ushered  in  by 
the  sunrise  in  the  night. 

To  Hildegarde,  as  though  given  in  that  hour  some 
gift  of  prophecy,  it  seemed  that  after  all  her  journeying 
the  land  she  looked  on  was  still  beyond  the  reach  of 
sober  day,  fated  to  be  for  ever  outside  the  experience  of 
waking  hours. 

Yet  this  incredible  country  for  two  years  had  been  her 
father's  home! 

Louis  would  go  ashore  in  the  first  boat  and  prepare 
Nathaniel  Mar  for  his  daughter's  coming. 

"If  I  were  alone  I  should  be  imagining  he  might  be 
dead. ' '  Even  as  she  said  "  if , "  an  inward  dread  clutched 
at  her. 

* '  If  you  were  alone  I  should  be  imagining  things  worse 
than  death."  They  drew  together.  As  he  held  her, 
looking  down  into  her  eyes,  a  new  gravity  came  into  his 
own.  "Are  you  sure  at  last?"  he  said. 


442  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"You  know  I  am.  But  I  don't  scold  you  for  asking. 
It  's  the  more  beautiful  of  you  to  have  quite  realized 
and  yet— yet  not  despise  me  for  all  that  romantic  feel 
ing  about  some  one  I  Ve  never  seen. ' ' 

"Your  mother  once  helped  me  there." 

"My  mother !    What  does  she  know  about —  " 

' '  More  than  you  might  think.  When  I  'd  lost  patience 
one  day,  she  told  me  the  only  difference  between  you 
and  other  girls  was  that  you  were  honester  and  stub- 
borner  than  most." 

"I  can  hear  her  saying  ' stubborner. '  ' 

"Yes,  but  it  was  curious  to  hear  her  saying  few 
women,  if  they  remember  their  youth,  can  truthfully 
say  it  went  by  without  some  such— well— she  called  it 
names— 

' '  I  know  one  of  them.    Some  such  silly  '  infatuation. '  ! 
Hildegarde  smiled,  but  not  he.    "I  wonder  if  my  mother 
ever—    Oh,  it  's  a  wild  idea ! ' ' 

"I  don't  know.  She  said  it  was  usually  either  a 
great  soldier  or  a  clergyman,  often  an  actor,  sometimes 
a  poet,  or  'even  a  bachelor  statesman.'  And  she  said 
that  last  with  such  an  edge  in  her  voice  I  wondered  at 
.the  time  what  American  statesman  was  still  unmarried 
when  Mrs.  Mar  was  in  her  'teens."  And  their  own 
cloud  was  dispersed  in  smiling  at  another's. 

Hildegarde,  coming  on  deck  at  six  o'clock,  found  sun 
shine  whitening  all  the  thousand  tents  of  Nome.  Frame 
dwellings,  too,  the  eye  found  out— one  standing  boldly 
forth  with  flag  flying.  That,  Blumpitty  said,  was  the 
hospital.  Was  her  father  there  1  Courage !  Louis  was 
at  her  side,  with  confident  looks  and  shining  eyes  that 
saw  no  shadow  save  the  purple  splotch  in  the  sea  to  the 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  443 

left— "Sledge  Island."  Had  she  noticed  the  snow- 
seamed  hills?  She  must  take  his  glass  and  look  at  that 
higher  lift  in  the  low,  undulant  line;  could  she  see  a 
queer  knob?  "Anvil  Eock!"  But  the  main  impres 
sion  up  the  beach,  and  down  the  beach,  and  away  over 
the  tundra,  was  tents,  tents.  And  between  the  Los  An 
geles  and  the  surf -whitened  shore,  sails,  sails !  Ships  of 
every  size  and  kind.  Big  steamers  from  Seattle,  from 
San  Francisco,  Portland,  and  Vancouver,  smart  sailing 
vessels,  lumbering  freight  boats,  whalers,  and  among 
them— darting  back  and  forth  like  a  flock  of  brown 
sparrows  under  the  gleaming  wings  of  seagulls— were 
myriads  of  little  skiffs,  dories,  lighters,  canoes,  and  here 
and  there  a  steam  launch,  bobbing,  swarming,  surround 
ing  "the  last  boat  in,"  and  ready  to  take  all  and  sundry 
to  Nome  for  dazzling  sums. 

While  the  more  enterprising  of  the  Los  Angeles'  con 
tingent  (swallowing  their  resentment  at  the  captain's 
failure  to  set  them  instantly  ashore)  bargained  with  the 
owners  of  the  small  craft,  a  rumor  ran  about  the  ship 
that  not  even  a  millionaire  might  leave  till  certain  for 
malities  had  been  complied  with.  But  Cheviot  had  in 
some  way  got  a  special  permit  to  go  ashore  with  one  of 
the  officers. 

While  Hildegarde  waited  after  breakfast  for  his  re 
turn,  she  tried  to  deaden  fear  of  the  news  he  might  bring 
back,  listening  to  the  scraps  of  talk  between  the  touting 
boatmen  and  the  passengers  longingly  suspended  over  the 
Los  Angeles'  side. 

Some  old  acquaintance  called  out  "Howdy"  to  the 
bean-feaster,  and  after  hearing  what  the  Commission 
had  settled  in  far  away  Washington,  screamed  back 


444  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

Nome  news  in  return.  They  were  "havin'  a  red  hot 
roarin'  boom,"  and  Jolly  Haley  had  made  a  million. 
One  of  the  great  steamers  was  spoken  as  she  moved 
majestically  by.  Others,  besides  the  Los  Angeles,  were 
overdue,  the  captain  of  the  Akron  said.  Those  haggard 
wrecks  down  there  toward  Cape  Nome— they  were  only 
two,  but  the  Bering  Sea  was  full  of  ships  disabled  or 
gone  down  in  these  last  days.  Gillies  asked  for  news  of 
friends  and  rivals.  The  Congress  had  put  into  Dutch 
Harbor  "for  repairs,"  he  was  told,  and  the  men  ex 
changed  grim  smiles.  The  Santa  Ana  was  burned  to 
within  two  feet  of  the  water.  The  passengers  on  the 
Chiquita  had  been  all  but  starved  to  death,  and  the  St. 
John  had  made  escape  from  the  ice-pack  only  to  go  to 
pieces  on  the  rocks.  Then,  like  some  sentient  thing  ex 
ulting  in  her  enviable  fate,  the  Akron  steamed  away  in 
the  sunshine. 

Popular  interest  shifted  to  starboard  when  the  whaler 
Beluga  drew  'longside.  Her  captain,  a  hard-looking 
customer,  came  on  board  the  Los  Angeles  to  talk  to  Gil 
lies.  0 'Gorman  discovered  a  man  he  knew  on  board  the 
whaler.  ' '  Going  to  Nome  ? "  he  asked  him.  ' '  No,  better 
than  that.  Gettin'  out."  Where  was  the  ex-Nomite  off 
to?  "Up  the  coast."  The  Beluga  was  to  meet  some 
south-bound  whalers  up  in  Grantley  Harbor  in  a  day  or 
two— might  come  south  herself  afterward,  or  might  go 
still  farther  north  to  Kotzebue.  0 'Gorman's  friend 
did  n't  care  where,  just  so  it  was  n't  Nome.  The  people 
of  the  Los  Angeles  only  laughed.  Clear  that  fellow  was 
a  hoodoo.  The  more  luck  in  Nome,  since  he  was  leav 
ing  it ! 

"He  might  be   able  to  give  you  news   about  your 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  445 

father,"  0 'Gorman  said  aside  to  Miss  Mar.  But  before 
she  answered  he  saw,  from  the  sudden  fear  in  the  girl's 
face,  that  she  could  n't  risk  having  bawled  at  her  in 
public  tidings  that  more  and  more  she  dreaded. 

"He— Mr.  Cheviot  will  soon  be  back,"  she  said. 

"Has  he  been  in  Nome  all  winter? — your  Beluga 
friend  ? ' '  Mrs.  Locke  asked  0  'Gorman. 

"Yes,  I  guess  so." 

"I  'd  like  to  inquire  about  my  firm,  Dixon  and  Blu- 
menstein."  0 'Gorman  called  out  the  question  for 
her. 

"Lots  o'  folks  inquirin'  'bout  Dixon  and  Blumen- 
stein,"  the  man  on  the  whaler  roared  back. 

"How  so?" 

"Lit  out." 

"Gone  away?" 

1  'You  bet." 

1  'What  for?" 

"Busted." 

"Oh,  Mrs.  Locke,  what  shall  you  do?"  While  Hilde- 
garde,  vaguely  aware  of  the  unusual  sound  of  a  dog 
howling  distractedly,  stood  beside  the  woman  who  in 
those  seconds  had  seen  her  hoped-for  home,  her  very 
bread  swept  from  her,  Louis's  voice  was  audible  over 
the  girl's  shoulder.  Hildegarde  turned  to  find  herself 
in  her  father's  arms.  She  did  not  notice  how  wet  he 
was  with  sea-water.  "Oh,  you  are  ill!"  she  faltered. 

"My  child!  My  child!"  he  kept  repeating,  and 
then :  ' '  What  a  journey ! ' ' 

' '  But  you  see  I  've  got  to  Nome  all  right. ' ' 

"To  Nome!    God  forbid!" 

"But  God  has  n't  forbidden,"  said  the  girl,  swallow- 


446  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

ing  the  sob  that  sight  of  the  haggard  face  had  brought 
into  her  throat.  She  was  conscious,  too,  that  her  fellow- 
travelers  were  eagerly  listening  to  the  colloquy. 

"I  've  been  telling  Cheviot  I  can 't  think  how  he  could 
allow  you—  Mr.  Mar  caught  himself  up  and  laid  his 
hand  affectionately  on  the  young  man's  shoulder.  "Of 
course  Louis  did  n't  really  know.  The  Nome  he  left  was 
bad  enough,  but  that  Nome  has  passed  away.  To-day 
it  is  n  't  a  place  for  a  girl  to  stay  in  an  hour. ' ' 

"  'Sh !  father !  You  '11  scare  my  friends.  This  is  Mrs. 
Blumpitty.  She  thinks  very  highly  of  Nome.  And  this 
is  Mr.  Blumpitty.  Mother  put  me  under  their  care, 
and  they  've  been  so  kind.  They  Ve  brought  a  big  party 
up  again  this  year.  We  've  all  come  believing  great 
things  of  the  new  camp." 

The  moment  the  handshaking  was  over,  "This  way/' 
Cheviot  said,  and  while  the  talk  buzzed,  and  the  dog 
somewhere  down  yonder  among  the  swarming  rowboats 
howled  dismally,  and  questions  showered  on  the  man 
from  Nome,  Louis  was  leading  Mr.  Mar  toward  the  com- 
panionway. 

"Oh,  yes,"  said  Hildegarde,  "my  suit-case  and  things. 
But  father  need  n't  trouble  to  come  below.  I  've  had 
everything  packed  and  ready  for  hours!"  She  smiled 
at  Cheviot  across  the  halting  figure.  "What  kept  you 
so,  Louis  ?  Could  n 't  you  find  him  ? ' ' 

"You  can't  get  along  very  fast  over  there,"  Cheviot 
answered. 

"Tow  could  n't?" 

' '  Nobody  can.  There  's  a  wall  of  stuff  piled  higgledy- 
piggledy  for  a  mile  along  the  shore. ' ' 

' '  Dingleys  and  McKeowns,  and— ' ' 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  447 

"Yes,  and  grub.  Tons  of  it.  Hundreds  of  barrels  of 
whisky.  Thousands  of  bags  of  flour  and  beans  piled 
higher  than  my  head.  Lumber— acres  of  it.  Furniture 
and  bedding,  engines  and  boilers,  mixed  up  with  sides 
of  bacon  and  blankets,  and  a  sprinkling  of  centrifugal 
pumps  and  Klondike  thawers.  How  they  '11  ever  sort 
that  chaos—  " 

"The  next  high  tide  will  save  them  the  trouble,"  said 
Nathaniel  Mar. 

"Well,  it  's  a  queer  sight.  Hundreds  and  hundreds 
of  people,  Hildegarde,  sitting  on  top  of  their  worldly 
goods,  looking  as  if  they  'd  never  stir  again.  Like  so 
many  Robinson  Crusoes,  each  one  on  his  own  desert 
island,  among  the  wreck  of  his  possessions. ' '  Hildegarde 
smiled.  Louis  was  only  pointing  out  that  Nome  justified 
his  prophecy.  A  form  of  "I  told  you  so."  But  he  was 
speaking  to  her  father.  "And  the  faces!  You  're  used 
to  them,  but  I—  He  caught  Hildegarde 's  significant 
little  smile  and  deliberately  changed  the  tune.  "Of 
course  there  's  a  lot  of  hustling,  too, ' '  he  ended,  stopping 
by  the  smoking-room  door. 

"Yes,  the  old  story,"  said  Hildegarde 's  father,  wear 
ily.  "All  land  there  free  and  equal  from  the  common 
life  of  the  ships.  Twenty  minutes,  and  some  are  masters 
and  others  are  slaves. ' ' 

"I  thought  there  'd  be  no  one  here!"  Cheviot  said 
with  satisfaction,  as  he  held  open  the  door. 

"Is  n't  the  boat  ready  to  take  us  back?"  Hildegarde 
asked. 

"I  suppose,"  said  her  father,  leaning  heavily  on  his 
stick  and  looking  at  her  from  under  his  bushy  eyebrows, 
"you  think  we  've  got  hotels  over  yonder." 


448  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"Oh,  no." 

"There  is  n't  even  a  boarding-house— 

"Mrs.  L 'Estrange  will  be  glad!  She  's  going  to  set 
up  the  very  thing,  and  make  her  everlasting  fortune." 

"Well,  /  'm  glad"— Mar  dropped  into  the  nearest 
seat— "very  glad  you  're  a  sensible  girl  and  take  it  like 
that." 

Imagine  his  thinking  she  'd  come  expecting  a  hotel 
and  all  the  comforts  of  home !  That  was  why  he  seemed 
so  harassed.  ' '  Poor  father ! ' '  She  put  an  arm  about  his 
crooked  shoulders.  It  had  been  hard  for  him  to  make 
his  way  over  the  chaos  of  the  beach,  and  he  had  got  so 
wet  coming  out.  How  thoughtful  of  that  dear  Louis 
to  bring  him  in  here  to  rest  before  undertaking  the  re 
turn  trip. 

The  old  man  crossed  his  wrinkled  hands  on  the  knob 
of  his  heavy  stick  and  slowly  shook  his  head.  "No, 
Nome  was  n  't  Paradise  before,  but  since  the  invasion  it  's 
a  hell  upon  earth. ' ' 

"Oh,  father!" 

"Well,  think  of  it!  Something  like  forty  thousand 
homeless  people  stranded  over  yonder  on  the  beach. ' ' 

"I  'm  glad  you  have  n't  been  one  of  the  homeless 
ones,"  she  said  gently. 

"I  don't  know  how  glad  you  'd  be  if  you  saw  my  one- 
roomed  tent  on  the  boggy  tundra." 

"Dearest."  She  took  off  his  big  soft  hat  that  im 
peached  his  dignity  with  an  absurd  operatic  air,  and  she 
stroked  the  whitened  hair.  "It  's  well  I"— she  looked 
across  at  her  lover— "we  've  come  to  look  after  you." 

' '  Oh,  I  'm  one  of  the  fortunate  Nomites !  I  tell  you  a 
man  with  any  sort  of  shelter  over  his  head  is  in  luck. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  449 

Hundreds  are  sleeping  on  the  beach  in  the  cold  and 
rain." 

1 1  Silly  people  not  to  buy  a  tent. ' ' 

"Most  of  them  did,  and  can't  get  it  landed  or  can't 
find  it  in  the  hurly-burly. ' ' 

1 '  Oh,  I  hope  mine  won 't  get  lost ! ' ' 

"Yours!" 

"Yes,  father,  I  've  got  a  tent  and  two  pairs  of  Hudson 
Bay  blankets,  waterproof  boots,  stout  netting— for  the 
mosquitoes,  you  know.  Oh,  I  have  heard  all  about  those 
mosquitoes!  I  Ve  got  a  canvas  knapsack  and  an  oil- 
stove,  and  oceans  of  oil,  and  a  pistol  and  plenty  of  choco 
lates  and  six  weeks'  provisions."  With  a  little  encour 
agement  she  would  have  told  him  every  item  in  that  six 
weeks'  provision.  She  was  distinctly  proud  of  her  list. 
Many  people  on  the  Los  Angeles  had  complimented  her 
upon  its  judicious  selection. 

But  Nathaniel  Mar's  face  showed  no  pride— showed 
something  even  like  horror.  "I  can't  think  what  you 
were  about,  Cheviot,"  he  said  almost  sharply. 

Hildegarde  was  still  incredulous  that  Louis  had  been 
able  to  resist  the  natural  temptation  of  '  *  telling  on  her, ' ' 
and  saving  his  own  credit.  "Does  n't  father  know— 
anything  ? ' ' 

"Oh,  yes,  I  told  him— about  us." 

"It  's  the  one  redeeming  feature  in  the  present  situa 
tion,"  said  Mr.  Mar. 

' '  Father ! ' '    She  was  really  wounded  by  that. 

"But  as  I  've  told  you  already"— he  turned  his  mel 
ancholy  eyes  on  the  young  man— "I  'd  take  more  com 
fort  in  the  intelligence  if  you  had  n't  brought  her  up 
here!" 

29 


450  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

' '  Does  he  say  he  brought  me  1 " 

' '  He  can 't  say  he  prevented  you. ' ' 

"I  would  come.  I  was  afraid  we  'd  never  get  you 
back. ' '  She  was  on  the  verge  of  tears. 

"Well,  well,"  said  Cheviot  briskly,  "it  's  no  use 
spilling  milk. ' ' 

"No,"  agreed  the  old  man.  " It  might  be  worse.  Af 
ter  all,  the  ship  is  going  back  in  a  week  and  I  '11  make 
arrangements  for  you  to  live  on  board  till  then. ' ' 

Hildegarde  withdrew  her  arm.  She  came  and  stood  in 
front  of  the  bowed  old  man.  "You  can't  mean  that 
while  I  am  here,  I  'm  not  to  stay  with  you— or  in  my 
own  tent  near — 

"Your  tent!"  Mr.  Mar  lifted  one  hand,  calling 
heaven  to  witness  his  offspring's  folly.  "As  to  'near' 
me,  I  'm  sleeping  in  a  ghastly  lodging-house  myself  at 
the  moment.  We  pay  ten  dollars  a  night  for  floor  space. 
Spread  a  blanket  on  filthy  boards,  and  try  to  get  some 
rest  in  spite  of  drunken  rows  and  vermin." 

"I  should  think  even  a  tent  in  the  bog  was  better  than 
that." 

"Much.  I  've  lent  mine  for  a  few  nights  to  a  mis 
erable  woman  and  her  daughter,  who  'd  slept  a  week  on 
the  beach.  Like  Hildegarde  here,  they  'bought  a  tent!' 
It  's  on  that  steamer  we  passed.  There  are  half  a  dozen 
ships  that  can't  get  unloaded." 

' '  I  don 't  know  that  I  like  those  other  women  living  in 
your  tent,"  said  Hildegarde,  with  frank  envy. 

"Some  of  us  are  arranging  to  get  the  daughter  home." 

"Not  the  mother?" 

"No." 

"She  's  going  to  stay !"• 


COME  AND  FIND  MB  451 

"She  's  got  consumption." 

"Oh!" 

"They  came  in  the  steerage.    No,  the  mother  won't  go 
home,  and  won't  need  my  tent  long,  I  think." 

Hildegarde  stroked  his  hand.    ' '  It  was  like  you,  father, 
to  give  them  shelter. ' ' 

"It  's  been  pretty  much  as  you  saw  it  this  morning"— 
Mar  turned  to  Louis— "  for  two  weeks  now.    People  are 
paralyzed.     The  fall  from  the  height  of  their  anticipa 
tions  has  stunned  them.    The  women  sit  and  wait.    For 
what,  they  don't  know.  The  men  drink  and  play  high,  and 
when  they  're  cleaned  out  and  can't  think  of  anything 
else  to  do,  they  shoot.     There  were  two  men  killed  last 
night  in  a  fight  over  a  lot.    In  the  last  week  there  have 
been  six  suicides.     Nobody  minds.    What  's  the  spilling 
of  a  little  blood?     A  thing  far  more  important  is  the 
scarcity  of  water.     You  buy  it  by  the  small  bucketful 
and  carry  it  home  yourself.     If  you  don't  boil  it,  you 
get  typhoid.     The  mayor  told  somebody  that,  after  all, 
we  lacked  only  two  things  here— water  and  good  society. 
The  stranger  said:  'It   's  all  the  damned  lack.'  "     It 
was  as  striking  to  ears  that  heard  the  retort  then  for  the 
first  time  as  though  the  saying  had  not  grown  hoary. 
"You  '11  see,"  Mar  said,  as  though  Cheviot  had  denied 
such  a  possibility,  "it  '11  be  worse  here  than  ever  Dawson 
was  in  the  toughest  times.     We  have  n't  got  any  such 
body  of  men  to  keep  the  peace  as  the  mounted  police." 
"And  to  think  it  's  all  your  fault,  father." 
Mar  stared  at  her. 

"Two  years  ago  and  nobody  cared  a*  pin  to  go  to 
Nome.  You  could  n't  induce  the  boys  to  come.  You 
had  to  bribe  even  Louis.  Now  forty  thousand  people, 


452  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

and  all  that  tangle  on  the  beach."  Her  eyes  were  eager. 
"Nome,  at  this  minute,  must  be  the  most  wonderful 
sight  in  the  world. ' ' 

"It  's  the  dump-heap  of  the  nations!  I  '11  tell  you 
what  happened  a  week  ago."  Mr.  Mar  was  almost  volu 
ble  in  his  anxiety  to  convince  his  daughter  of  the  unfit- 
ness  of  Nome  as  a  subject  of  feminine  curiosity.  "I  'd 
been  to  the  A.  C.  store  and  got  a  small  draft  cashed. 
Then  I  went  up  to  Penny  River  and  was  gone  all  day. 
As  I  came  back,  behind  the  big  Music  Hall  tent,  I  was 
held  up.  Two  men  turned  out  my  pockets  and  made  off 
with  my  thirty  dollars.  It  was  no  use  reporting  the 
robbery.  I  was  very  tired,  and  I  went  to  bed.  I  was 
waked  up  by  some  one  rummaging  about.  But  before  I 
realized  what  was  happening  inside,  I  saw  there  were 
holes  cut  in  the  off  wall  of  my  tent,  and  two  pairs  of  eyes 
were  watching  me.  A  little  lower  down  the  bores'  of  a 
couple  of  pistols  were  sticking  through.  I  lay  perfectly 
still,  and  presently  the  man  inside,  who  'd  been  going 
through  my  grip-sack,  threw  it  down.  'Where  do  you 
keep  your  stuff,  anyhow?'  he  said,  and  then  I  recognized 
him.  'You  're  not  in  luck.  You  've  got  hold  of  the 
same  person  twice,'  I  said.  'Think  we  did  n't  know 
that?'  he  said.  'We  made  such  a  devilish  poor  haul  we 
thought  we  'd  give  you  another  chance.  Come  along,' 
he  said,  'where  do  you  keep  the  rest?'  And  when  he 
found  there  was  n't  anything  in  the  tent  but  a  match 
and  a  pistol— well,  he  was  good  enough  to  tell  me  his 
opinion  of  me." 

"I  don't  understand— is  n't  it  daylight  all  night?" 
"Yes,  but  some  of  the  honest  people  try  to  sleep,  and 
then  the  crooks  take  over  the  town.    The  place  is  full  of 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  453 

the  professional  criminal  class.  And  if  it  were  n't, 
Nome,  as  it  is  to-day,  would  breed  them.  My  next-door 
neighbor  says  if  he  owned  all  the  Nome  district  and 
owned  hell,  he  'd  sell  Nome  and  live  in  hell. ' ' 

"But  the  thing  that  brought  everybody  here— the 
gold!" 

"The  sour-doughs  are  getting  some  out  of  the  creeks. 
But  there  are  n't  any  more  windfalls  for  late  comers, 
since  the  beach  was  worked  out. ' ' 

"I  did  see  one  or  two  cheechalkers  rocking  in  a  hole 
here  and  there, ' '  said  Cheviot. 

"Go  back  to-morrow;  you  won't  see  the  same  faces. 
'Poor  man's  country!' — where  bread  costs  more  than 
luxuries  anywhere  else  on  earth !  Any  business  that  's 
done  in  Nome  to-day  is  buying  and  selling  and  brokerage 
precisely  as  it  is  in  Wall  Street.  For  the  moneyless  mass 
there  is  n't  only  disappointment,  there  is  n't  only  hard 
ship  ;  there  's  acute  suffering  down  on  the  beach.  I  don 't 
know,  for  my  part,  where  it  's  going  to  end. ' ' 

"I  don't  mind  not  staying  long,"  said  Miss  Mar 
obligingly,  "in  a  place  where  you  wake  up  to  find 
pistols  and  eyes  peering  in  at  you ;  but  I  would  n't,  for  all 
the  world,  I  would  n't  miss  just  seeing  it. " 

Mr.  Mar  moved  his  stick  impatiently. 

"I  'd  be  willing  enough  to  miss  seeing  it,"  said  Che 
viot,  ' '  and  I  'm  not  squeamish  either.  But,  Lord !  some 
of  those  faces ! ' ' 

The  old  man  nodded.  "I  keep  away  from  the  water 
front  as  much  as  I  can.  Can't  stand  it.  I  've  never 
seen  such  despair  in  human  eyes.  If  there  are  lost 
souls  on  the  earth,  I  've  seen  them  on  the  beach  at 
Nome." 


454  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"Well,  I  dare  say  a  little  of  it  will  go  a  long  way  with 
me,  too." 

"Hildegarde,  you  're  growing  very  like  your  mother." 
" Thank  you,  father,"  said  the  girl,  imperturbably. 

"The  trouble  is  if  you  insisted  on  having  'a  little'  of 
Nome,  you  might  have  to  take  a  great  deal,"  Cheviot 
said. 

"Why  might  I?" 

He  exchanged  a  look  with  Mr.  Mar.  ' '  Come  out  here, 
Hildegarde,  and  I  '11  show  you. ' ' 

As  she  followed  to  the  ship's  side,  "What  makes  the 
dog  howl  so?"  she  asked.  "Look!  he  '11  be  out  of  that 
little  boat  in  a  minute— he  '11  be  drowned." 

Cheviot  leaned  over.  "Shut  up!"  he  called  down. 
' '  Say,  Red!  D '  you  hear  ?  Shut  up,  I  tell  you ! " 

The  dog  looked  critically  at  Cheviot,  ears  cocked,  nose 
pointed,  forefeet  on  the  gunwale  of  the  lighter,  which 
was  bobbing  about  at  the  foot  of  the  Los  Angeles'  ladder. 

"Louis,  is  that  father's  Reddy?  Oh,  I  do  so  want  to 
make  friends  with  him!  Red!  Red!  how  d'  you  do?  Be 
a  good  dog,  we  're  coming  down  in  a  minute. ' ' 

"I  '11  get  one  of  the  sailors  to  bring  him  up.  Here"— 
Cheviot  adjusted  his  glass  for  her— "now  look  off  there 
to  the  right— farther,  beyond  the  wreck  of  the  Pioneer. 
Do  you  see  that  big  tent  with  the  flag  ? ' ' 

"Yes." 

' '  Can  you  see  what  flag  it  is  ? " 

"It  is  n't  Stars  and  Stripes.    It  looks  all  yellow." 

"Yes." 

1 '  Who  are  the  people  who  have  a  yellow  flag  ? ' ' 

"The  people  who  have  smallpox.  That  's  the  pest- 
house.  ' ' 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  455 

ON  their  way  back  they  met  Blumpitty  asking,  sadder 
than  ever,  if  anybody  knew  how  soon  quarantine  was 
going  to  be  declared.  "Pretty  rough  on  the  people  who 
get  shut  out,"  murmured  Blumpitty. 

"Rougher  on  those  who  get  shut  in,"  said  Cheviot. 

Joslin  was  furious  at  either  prospect.  "Damned  non 
sense,"  he  said,  "spoilin'  the  finest  boom  since  '49,  all 
on  account  of  a  little  smallpox. ' ' 

They  found  Mr.  Mar  in  the  smoking-room,  in  the  same 
weary  attitude,  head  hung  over  his  wide  breast,  hat 
hung  on  the  sound  knee,  wooden  leg  stiffly  slanting,  eyes 
among  the  cigar  ashes  on  the  floor. 

"Whatever  else  I  do,  father,  I  can't  go  home  without 
you." 

"Oh,  I  '11  take  you  home,  my  dear,"  said  Mar,  with 
alacrity.  "I  've  nothing  to  keep  me  here  now,  except  my 
claims  at  Polaris." 

"Oh,"  said  the  girl,  losing  some  of  her  gloom,  "have 
you  got  a  share  in  the  Mother  Lode  ? ' ' 

He  smiled  faintly  at  miners'  superstition  on  his 
daughter's  lips.  "I  've  got  something  worth  looking 
after,"  he  said,  "though,  as  I  told  Louis,  I  wish  my  good 
luck  was  n't  always  so  inaccessible.  Only  two  boats 
touched  Polaris  'last  year.  I  don't  know  how  it  will  be 
this  summer.  I  was  n't  able  to  go  in  either  of  those 
that  have  set  off  so  far.  But  I  sent  up  a  man  to  do  the 
assessment  work. ' ' 

"I  '11  find  a  way  of  seeing  what  he  's  made  of  his 
job."  Cheviot  seemed  to  ratify  some  arrangement. 
Then  turning  to  Hildegarde:  "And  I  '11  follow  you  in 
the  first  ship. ' ' 

"Follow?  Can't  you  go  and  get  back  in  a  week?" 


456  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"I  might,  if  there  should  happen  to  be  a  boat."  He 
was  touchingly  pleased  at  Hildegarde's  unwillingness  to 
go  home  without  him. 

Quite  suddenly  she  remembered  0 'Gorman's  loud- 
voiced  friend  of  the  whaler.  "I  've  got  an  inspiration," 
she  said  gaily.  "Why  should  n't  we  all  three  go  up  to 
Polaris  in  the  bark  Beluga?  Yes,  yes,  that  whaler 
alongside  is  going  north  in  a  day  or  two.  Now,  don't 
say  it  's  impossible  till  you  see."  Quickly  she  outlined 
a  delightful  plan.  They  could  all  come  back  in  one  of 
the  boats  waiting  about  in  Grantley  Harbor.  Or  why 
should  n't  they  (after  they  'd  attended  to  the  Mother 
Lode),  why  should  n't  they  go  in  the  Beluga  as  far  as 
Kotzebue?  Nobody  realized  in  the  very  least,  she  said, 
her  immense  interest  in  all  this  queer  northern  world. 
And  after  what  she  'd  gone  through  to  get  here,  they 
wanted  to  forbid  her  Nome!  Adroitly  she  spoke,  as 
though  their  success  were  still  a  matter  of  doubt.  // 
she  did  n't  see  Nome,  oh,  how  she  'd  be  laughed  at  in 
Valdivia!  But  if  she  did  n't,  why  should  n't  she  be  a 
little  compensated  for  so  huge  a  disappointment?  But 
that  was  n't  the  main  consideration.  How  could  any 
body  expect  her  to  go  away  in  this  very  same  horrible 
boat  that  had  brought  her,  and  go  without  Louis  1  Was 
her  father  grown  so  hard-hearted  up  here  as  to  expect 
to  part  them  when  they  'd  only  just  found  each  other? 
Half -smiling,  but  serious  enough  in  reality,  as  Mar  could 
see,  she  pleaded  for  her  plan.  Louis  was  plainly  a  con 
vert,  though  he  did  say  in  a  feeble  and  highly  uncon 
vinced  fashion,  that  if  he  had  n't  used  up  all  his  credit 
with  her  on  the  subject  of  travel,  he  'd  point  out  that 
the  accommodation  on  board  these  coasting  vessels— 

"Oh,    don't   be   so    careful   of   me— you   two!"   she 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  457 

wailed.  "The  reasons  why  I  must  n't  see  Nome  surely 
don't  apply  to  Polaris.  Why  may  n't  I  have  a  look  at 
that  miraculous  Mother  Lode?  Besides,  Polaris!  why, 
that  's  where  Blumpitty  's  hermit  lives !  Dearest  father, 
I  've  been  dying  to  see  the  hermit.  Was  it  he  who  told 
you,  too,  where  to  get  claims  ? ' ' 

"Certainly  not.  I  would  n't  go  near  the  imposter! 
Living  on  people's  greedy  hopes.  That  '11  come  to  an 
end,  too,  some  fine  day ! ' ' 

"Well,  if  it  has  n't  come  to  an  end  yet,  you  won't 
mind  my  seeing  him,  will  you,  dearest  ?  It  is  n't  just  idle 
curiosity.  You  really  ought  to  sympathize  a  little.  I  must 
have  got  it  from  you— all  this  interest  in  the  North,  that 
we  used  to  think  was  left  out  of  the  rest  of  the  family. 
Don't  you  remember,  I  never  wondered  at  the  hold  it 
had  on  you?  Even  when  I  was  quite  little—"  She 
pulled  herself  up  suddenly,  with  an  anxious  glance  at 
Cheviot's  averted  face.  But  he  turned  briskly  at  that 
first  pause  and  said:  "I  '11  leave  you  to  butter  the 
parsnips,  Hildegarde,  while  I  tackle  the  captain." 

When  Cheviot  had  gone,  "What  's  the  news?"  said 
Mar. 

"Oh,  they  're  all  well,  and  the  boys  are  getting  on 
splendidly.  Mother  sends  you—" 

"Nothing  yet  from  Jack  Galbraith?" 

"Nothing,  up  to  the  day  I  left.  Father,  it  bores 
Louis  dreadfully,  hearing  about— arctic  exploration. 
We  won't  talk  about  Jack  Galbraith  before  Louis.  But 
I  've  often  thought,  while  I  'm  crawling  up  this  side  of 
the  round  world,  Jack  is  probably  sliding  down  the 
other." 

"It  's  one  of  the  reasons  for  going  home,"  said  the  old 
man,  thinking  aloud. 


CHAPTER  XXIII 

T  was  after  some  delay  through  fogs  that, 
on  a  clear  July  morning  to  Hildegarde  for 
ever  memorable,  the  small  whaling  vessel 
Beluga  anchored  below  the  cape  called 
Prince  of  Wales,  that  looks  across  the  nar 
row  Strait  of  Bering  to  the  Siberian  shore.  The  girl, 
with  her  new  friend  Reddy  at  her  side,  overheard  with 
inattentive  ear  her  father's  final  instructions.  Mar, 
whose  difficulty  in  getting  about  was  obviously  increased 
in  these  months  of  absence,  had  agreed  to  remain  on 
board.  Cheviot's  the  task  of  making  the  most  of  the 
brief  span  granted  by  the  surly  captain  for  inquiry  into 
the  condition  of  the  gold  camp  two  miles  across  the  surf, 
and  two  more  inland  up  Polaris  Creek. 

But  if  the  talk  between  the  men  about  possible  claim- 
jumpers,  treatment  of  "tailings,"  increase  of  water- 
power,  double  shifts,  and  clean-ups— if  such  matters 
held  but  a  modified  interest  for  the  girl  on  this  golden 
morning,  not  so  the  scene  itself.  Even  in  the  gray  light 
of  yesterday,  when,  toward  bedtime,  the  thicker  fog- 
veils  lifted  enough  to  show  how  far  the  Beluga  had  gone 
out  of  her  course,  the  girl  had  thrilled  at  the  misty 
vision  of  the  Diomede  Islands.  For  one  of  these  showed 
the  fringe  of  Asia.  Hildegarde  had  reached  that  place 
in  her  journeying  where  the  East  was  become  the  West, 

458 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  459 

and  where  to  find  the  farthest  limit  of  the  immemorial 
Orient  you  must  needs  look  toward  the  setting  sun. 

To-day,  coming  on  deck  before  she  broke  her  fast, 
something  in  the  girl  had  cried  out  greeting  at  her  first 
glimpse  of  the  coast-line  bluffs  of  extreme  northwestern 
Alaska,  drawn  in  purple  against  a  radiant  east,  to  the 
south  receding  a  little  from  the  shore  and  fainting  into 
the  blue  of  snow-flecked  hills  having  a  strip  of  tundra 
at  their  feet. 

There,  upon  that  narrow  coastwise  margin,  directly 
in  front  of  what  from  the  deck  of  the  Beluga  seemed  the 
highest  point  in  the  background,  the  sunshine  picked  out 
boldly  the  intense  white  of  the  handful  of  tents  that 
stood  for  the  settlement  of  Polaris  and  the  port  for  the 
Polaris  mining-camp. 

Hildegarde  had  won  her  father's  consent,  reluctant 
though  it  was,  that  she  should  go  ashore  with  Cheviot. 
Gaily  she  assured  him  it  was  little  compensation  enough 
to  a  girl  who  had  foregone  the  fearful  joys  of  Nome.  The 
visit  of  inspection  to  the  Polaris  claims  would  not  take 
long.  As  the  old  man  looked  at  his  * '  two  children, ' '  with 
the  sunshine  on  their  faces,  he  wondered  who  would 
have  the  heart  to  steal  from  them  a  single  one  of  those 
early  hours  of  enchantment. 

Not  Nathaniel  Mar. 

But  neither  he  nor  they  had  bargained  for  Reddy's 
bearing  them  company.  He  announced  his  intention 
unmistakably,  when  Cheviot  went  over  the  ship's  side 
into  the  small  boat  that  was  to  take  him  and  Hildegarde 
through  the  surf.  Mar  tried  in  vain  to  quiet  the  beast. 
So  unnerving  were  Mr.  Reddy's  demonstrations,  when 
he  saw  Hildegarde  preparing  to  follow  Cheviot,  that 


460  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

Mar  called  out,  Hildegarde  must  wait  till  the  dog  could 
be  shut  up ;  the  sailors  could  hardly  hold  him.  But  the 
men  below,  bobbing  about  on  the  rough  water,  were  with 
difficulty  preventing  the  boat  from  being  battered 
against  the  ship's  side,  and  Cheviot  was  shouting,  "No 
time  to  worry  with  the  dog ! ' ' 

At  the  same  moment,  Hildegarde,  hanging  suspended 
between  her  two  counselors  on  the  swinging  ladder,  saw 
a  big  wave  sweeping  askew  the  boat  beneath  her.  From 
above  her  father,  and  Cheviot  from  below,  called  out 
"Hold  tight,"  while  Louis  supplemented  the  vain  ef 
forts  of  the  two  other  men,  unable  by  themselves  to 
steady  the  clumsy  craft  in  such  a  sea.  But  Hildegarde, 
with  a  conviction  that  Reddy,  escaping  out  of  a  sailor's 
arms,  was  in  the  act  of  coming  down  on  her  head, 
jumped  from  the  ladder  and  landed  in  the  boat  with 
the  dog  and  a  twisted  ankle.  Instantly  she  called  up  to 
her  horrified  father,  "I  'm  all  right,  and  so  is  Reddy." 
Whereupon  the  boat  was  swung  out  into  open  water. 
They  had  gone  half  a  mile  before  Cheviot  discovered 
something  was  amiss.  "Nothing  the  least  serious,"  she 
said,  though  it  would  be  serious  enough  for  her  if  she 
were  cheated  of  the  two  or  three  hours'  wandering 
at  Louis's  side  on  this  heaven-sent  morning  through 
the  wild,  sunshiny  land  across  the  surf.  Che 
viot  was  for  turning  round  at  once  and  tak 
ing  her  back  to  the  steamer,  but  that  would  be 
to  prolong  by  a  mile  a  sufficiently  difficult  transit. 
He  would  send  her  back  after  the  boat  had  landed 
him. 

"No,  no,"  she  pleaded.  "If  I  can't  walk,  I  '11  wait 
for  you  on  shore. ' ' 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  461 

But  Cheviot  was  giving  the  sailors  directions  about 
getting  her  safely  back  to  the  Beluga. 

Then,  for  the  first  time,  the  girl  spoke  of  the  stark 
discomfort  that  reigned  aboard  the  whaler,  how  she 
longed  for  a  little  respite,  and  how  she  longed-  But  the 
landward-looking  eyes  could  not,  down  here  in  the  deep 
sea  furrows,  pick  out  the  far-shining  tents  toward  which 
the  lighter  was  plunging,  down  the  watery  dales  and  up 
on  foamy  hills,  and  down  again  to  shining  green  deeps 
that  shut  out  ship  and  shore— holding  the  small  boat 
hugged  an  uneasy  instant  in  the  rocking  lap  of  the  sea. 
Yet  the  girl  clung  to  the  memory  of  that  early  morning 
vision  from  the  deck,  of  violet  headlands  and  snow-filled 
hollows,  and  as  the  boat  rode  high  again  on  the  top  of 
the  next  big  breaker,  she  drew  in  rapturous  breath,  say 
ing  softly  of  the  land  beckoning  her  across  the  furious 
surf,  "The  'farthest  North'  that  I  shall  know!'  But 
in  the  end  she  owed  it  to  Reddy's  companionship  that 
Cheviot  let  her  have  her  way. 

"Oh,  what  an  old-fashioned  Turk  of  a  man  I  shall 
have  to  spend  my  life  with!"  But  she  laughed  for  joy 
at  the  prospect. 

As  Cheviot,  sharply  scrutinizing  the  harborless  shore, 
directed  the  boat  above  the  settlement:  "Some  better 
landing-place  round  the  point?"  she  asked. 

"I  don't  expect  a  landing-place  on  this  coast,  but  I 
don't  see  even  the  tumble-down  sod  hut  your  father 
talked  about." 

The  boat  shot  up  out  of  a  boiling  hollow,  and  as  it 
climbed  the  slippery  back  of  a  great  wave,  Hildegarde 
called  out,  "I  see  it!" 
"The  hut?    Where?" 


462  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"All  alone,  over  yonder.  Just  beyond  those  rocks. 
That  's  where  you  and  I  will  sit  and  wait,  won't  we, 
Red  ?  Those  rocks  are  farther  north  than  where  the  tents 
are  shining— ' farther  north/  do  you  hear,  Mr.  Red?" 

Beyond  the  chaos  of  boulders,  in  a  cloud  of  spray,  the 
boat  was  not  so  much  beached  as  daringly  run  in  and  her 
passengers  ejected,  all  in  that  breathless  instant  before 
the  turbulent  water  withdrew,  carrying  out  the  clumsy 
craft  as  lightly  as  it  would  a  cork.  And  now  already  the 
toiling  sailors  were  some  yards  on  their  way  back,  disap 
pearing  round  the  point.  Hildegarde  was  safe  on  a 
temporary  perch,  and  Reddy  much  occupied  in  howling 
defiance  at  each  thunderous  onslaught  of  the  surf.  Che 
viot,  thinking  to  combine  the  girl's  appeal  for  "a  good 
observatory"  with  his  own  notion  of  an  easy  niche  safe 
beyond  the  tide's  reach,  went  to  spy  out  the  land  over 
there  where  some  mighty  storm  had  piled  the  rocks.  At 
sight  of  a  man  skulking  among  the  boulders,  Cheviot 
called  out,  "Hello!" 

With  a  certain  reluctance  the  bearded  figure  shuffled 
into  fuller  view.    ' '  Hello ! "  he  said,  without  enthusiasm. 

"Do  you  belong  here?"  he  was  asked. 

"Sort  o'." 

"Oh— a— anything  doing?" 

"Where?" 

"Why,  here." 

f<Heref    What  d'  y'  expect  anybody  to  do  here?" 

"Is  n't  there  a  camp  just  over  yonder?" 

"Up  in  the  hills.     Yep,  there   's  a  camp  there  all 
right." 

"Nothing  in  it,  though?" 

"Plenty.     Things  are  boomin'  out  there.     Thought 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  463 

you  meant  here."  And  he  looked  past  the  new  arrivals 
in  an  unpleasant,  shifty  fashion. 

They  exchanged  glances.  Hildegarde  was  so  sure 
Louis  would  n't  go  away  and  leave  such  an  individual 
hanging  about  that  she  felt  no  surprise  at  hearing  him 
offered  money  "to  come  along  and  show  the  way." 

When  the  two  had  agreed  on  the  price  of  this  service, 
Cheviot  said :  "  I  '11  be  ready  in  a  minute.  I  want  to  find 
a  more  comfortable  seat  for  this  lady,"  and  off  he 
bolted  toward  the  rocks. 

The  man  eyed  Hildegarde  askance,  and  made  some 
observation. 

"I  can't  hear  you,"  she  called,  above  the  noise  of  the 
surf. 

He  shuffled  nearer.    ' '  Ain  't  you  goin ',  too  ?  " 
' '  Out  to  the  mines  ?    No. " 
"What  y'  goin'  t'  do?"  he  asked. 
The  girl  laughed.     "Oh,  just  stay  here  and  look  at 
things." 

"What  things?"  The  uneasy  eye  shot  out  a  sudden 
alert  beam. 

She  only  smiled,  as  her  own  glance  wandered  to  the 
wider  vision. 

"I  got  some  'things'  to  see  after  m'self,"  he  said  in  a 
surly  tone.  "Guess  I  ain't  got  time  to  go  to  no  gulch 
to-day." 

The  girl  fell  a  prey  to  misgiving  lest  this  incident 
should  end  in  dissuading  Louis  from  leaving  her  at  all. 
Was  her  insistence  upon  coming  to  result  in  defeat  of 
the  expedition  ? 

The  shifty  man  had  drawn  a  trifle  nearer  still  and 
lowered  his  voice.  "What  made  yer  land  here?" 


464  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

' '  It  did  n  't  seem  to  matter  where  we  landed.  There  's 
no  harbor." 

"But  here  yer  so—  It  occurred  to  Hildegarde,  for 
some  inexplicable  reason,  he  was  going  to  add,  "so  near 
that  hut,"  instead  of  what  he  did  say,  "so  fur  from 
town." 

At  the  obvious  suspicion  on  the  man 's  face,  Hildegarde 
smiled  to  herself.  If  this  uncouth  apparition  had  in 
spired  distrust  in  the  new  arrivals,  their  appearance  had 
precisely  the  same  effect  on  him. 

"Y'  might  'a'  come  and  gone  before  anybuddy  in  the 
town  knowed  we  'd  had  visitors,"  he  said,  with  an  air 
indescribably  sly. 

"Well,  you  see,  our  business  is  n't  in  the  town. 
We  're  nearer  the  diggings  here,  are  n't  we?" 

'  *  Guess  yer  been  here  afore. ' ' 

"No,  neither  of  us." 

"Then  yer  better  come  along  with  me  and  him,  an' 
have  a  look  at  the  gulch. ' ' 

So  he  did  n't,  after  all,  want  to  remain  behind  and 
murder  her  for  her  watch ! 

"No,  I  shall  stay  here,  and  while  you  and  my  friend 
are  gone,  I  '11  practise  shooting  at  a  mark."  As  she 
drew  her  little  revolver  out  of  her  pocket,  and  the  sil 
ver  mounting  caught  the  sunlight,  she  recognized 
herself  for  a  very  astute  person.  Louis,  if  no  one 
else,  might  quite  well  need  reminding  that  she  was 
armed. 

"Y'  won't  go?"  the  man  persisted.  "Well,  I  guess  I 
ain't  got  time  fur  it  neither.  I  ought  to  see  a  man  up  at 
the  store. ' ' 

In  the  act  of  going  forward  to  meet  Cheviot  with  this 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  465 

information,  the  unaccountable  creature  paused  to  say 
over  his  shoulder :  '  *  Yer  sure  to  git  a  nugget  if  yer  go  to 
the  gulch." 

"I  'd  go  quick  enough  if  I  could  walk. ' ' 

He  faced  about.  "Y'  can't  walk!"  It  seemed  some 
how  to  make  a  difference,  but  he  narrowed  his  little  eyes. 
"Why  can't  yer?" 

"I  Ve  sprained  my  ankle." 

"Oh!    Bad?" 

4 '  I  'm  afraid  so.  I  Ve  been  told  not  to  put  my  foot  to 
the  ground— or  else  I  'd  hobble  to  the  town  and  hunt  up 
a  man  I  Ve  heard  lives  hereabouts."  Ah,  that  inter 
ested  the  disreputable  one  quite  as  much,  apparently, 
as  it  did  Miss  Mar.  "I  wonder  if  you  know  him!  A 
queer,  hermit  sort  of  person  who  discovered  the — 
What  's  the  matter?" 

"I  knowed  all  along  what  ye  'd  come  fur." 

"Oh,  we  did  n't  come  for  that— it  was  only  my  idea — 
but  it  's  not  much  good  now  I  'm  crippled. ' ' 

' '  What  did  yer  want  to  see  him  fur  1 ' ' 

"Oh,  just  to  hear  him  talk." 

"Ye-es.  I  been  told  they  's  a  lot  would  V  liked  to 
hear  him  talk,  only  it  's  no  go.  And  people  gits  tired  o ' 
feedin'  a  feller  with  such  a  parshallity  fur  keepin'  his 
mouth  shut. ' ' 

Cheviot  had  come  back  with,  "Put  that  away!"  as  he 
caught  sight  of  the  revolver.  "I  Ve  made  a  kind  of 
chair  for  you,  and  lined  it  with  overcoat. ' '  He  half  car 
ried  her  over  to  the  rocks,  while  she  clung  to  him,  spar 
ing  the  hurt  foot.  The  man  with  the  long,  lank  chin- 
beard,  like  the  last  nine  inches  of  a  cow's  tail,  watched 
proceedings  with  a  critical  eye. 

30 


466  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

''There  now!"  Louis  had  established  her  to  his  satis 
faction.  "And  Red  '11  take  care  of  you  since  he  's 
grown  such  a  gentleman.  You  hear,  Bed?"  he  admon 
ished  the  cock-eared  dog. 

"Reddy  hears,  and  Reddy  11  do  it,  but  if  I  were  n't  so 
hopelessly  happy  I  'd  be  rather  miserable  at  finding 
myself  a  prisoner.  This  day  of  all  days  in  the  year!" 
And,  in  spite  of  Cheviot's  assurance  that  he  was  n't 
going  to  be  long,  she  looked  a  little  wistfully  after  her 
lover. 

"It  's  all  right, ' '  his  queer  guide  hung  back  a  moment 
to  assure  her.  "It  don't  reely  matter  as  much  as  you 
think." 

"Oh,  it  does  n't!" 

"No,  fur  he  ain't  here." 

"Who?     The- 

« Yep— feller  y'  come  to  see." 

She  humored  him.    "You  mean  the— 

"Yep." 

"Come  along,  Father  Christmas,"  shouted  Cheviot, 
taking  the  tundra  on  a  run. 

"Father   Christmas!     D'  ye  hear  wot  he    's  callin' 

me?" 

"Where  is  he,  then?"  Hildegarde  persisted. 

"Dead." 

"Oh,  I  'm  disappointed  to  hear  that.  You  are  too 
young  for  Father  Christmas,  but  I  was  beginning  to 
hope  you  might  be  the  hermit. 

She  took  her  disappointment  so  light-heartedly  that 
the  odd  creature  grinned. 

"Golly,  don't  I  wish  I  wus  'the  hermit,'  "  he  mut 
tered,  as  he  scrambled  up  the  tundra  after  Cheviot. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  467 

WHAT  nonsense  to  talk  of  being  a  prisoner!  Her  eyes 
were  free  to  roam,  and  her  heart  was  light  as  a  bird's 
homing  across  the  shining  world  toward  the  shining 
future.  She  must  remember  always  in  the  happiness 
that  was  coming,  how  she  first  had  seen  it  at  its  vividest 
from  a  throne  of  rocks,  sitting  between  the  tundra  and 
the  sea.  Oh,  but  she  was  glad  she  had  come !  If  it  was 
Cheviot's  mission  to  see  how  work  went  on  at  the  gold 
camp,  hers  no  less  to  see  with  her  own  eyes— to  get  by 
heart  and  keep  for  ever— the  aspect  of  the  world  up  here 
where  you  touch  the  skirts  of  the  uttermost  North. 
Happy,  happy  chance  that  vouchsafed  the  vision  on  one 
of  those  unmatched  days  of  the  short  arctic  summer 
that  she  'd  heard  about  so  long  ago— a  day  that  made 
you  feel  never  before  have  you  seen  the  sunshine  shower 
ing  such  a  glory  on  the  world,  never  known  such  color 
on  the  sea,  never  felt  the  sweet  wind  bringing  influence 
so  magical.  You  unfurl  the  banner  of  your  spirit,  and 
you  carry  the  splendid  hour  like  a  flag,  looking  abroad 
and  saying:  "This  is  what  it  is,  then,  to  be  alive.  And 
I— I  am  still  among  the  living!" 

In  that  same  hour,  a  few  yards  from  where  Hildegarde 
sat  waiting,  a  man  was  saying  farewell  to  sun  and  sea 
and  all  the  shining  ways  of  all  the  world ;  and  this  man, 
dying  in  the  peat  hut  at  the  tundra 's  edge,  was  that  one 
of  all  who  heap  up  riches  having  most  to  leave  behind. 

There  was  nothing  about  the  solitary  hovel  that  spec 
ially  arrested  the  girl's  attention.  She  had  seen  several 
such  on  the  way,  during  the  delay  at  Grantley  Harbor- 
rude  makeshift  shelters,  deserted  in  favor  of  the  boom 
ing  camp  at  Nome.  But  Reddy  found  the  sod  hut  some 
how  interesting,  even  suspicious.  He  had  gone  away  to 


468  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

snuff  at  the  threshold.  He  tore  back  to  Hildegarde  to 
report,  then  off  again.  Now  he  had  set  his  sharp  nose 
against  the  door,  and  now  he  howled  softly.  In  the 
momentary  lull  of  surf  drawn  seaward,  to  Hildegarde 's 
surprise,  a  responsive  whine  came  weakly  forth  from  the 
hut.  Whereat  Red's  excitement  was  so  great  that  the 
girl  forgot  her  ankle  and  stood  up  to  quiet  him.  Why, 
the  ankle  hardly  hurt  at  all!  She  might  have  gone— 
could  she,  even  now,  catch  up  with  Louis?  She  picked 
her  way  across  the  rocks  with  scarce  a  twinge  of  pain, 
and  she  climbed  upon  the  thick  moss  carpet  of  the 
tundra.  Of  course  she  could  have  gone !  But  Louis  was 
out  of  sight.  To  say  sooth,  she  was  in  a  mood  too  happy 
to  be  cast  down.  For,  as  she  had  just  been  feeling,  it 
was  one  of  those  hours  when  all  life  seems  to  be  waiting 
for  one  to  come  and  claim  it,  when  a  girl  feels  she  has 
just  this  little  time  for  pausing  at  the  gate,  to  give  the 
glad  eyes  full  possession  before  she  enters  in.  She  takes 
the  sunshine  on  her  face,  and  all  her  being  melts  to  gold, 
and  has  its  little  share  in  making  the  wide  earth  shine. 
Even  her  secret  dreams  are  dissolved  in  the  universal 
sea.  Instead  of  hoping,  fearing,  her  heart  floats  like  an 
idle  boat  in  that  shifting  iridescence.  In  the  air,  instead 
of  trumpet-call  and  battle-cry  only  a  long,  low  singing 
on  the  beach.  No;  one  thing  beside— a  faint  whining 
from  within  a  deserted  hovel.  Again,  from  without,  the 
beast  before  the  desolate  threshold  woke  the  hill-born 
echoes  with  his  howling.  Surely  a  stray  dog  had  got 
in  there  and  been  unable  to  get  out.  She  would  open 
the  doof  barely  wide  enough  to  throw  him  some  of  the 
pilot  bread1  she  'd  brought  in  her  pocket  for  luncheon. 
She  lifted  a  hand  to  the  rude  latch,  but,  instead  of  open- 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  469 

ing  the  door  outright,  sheer  habit,  with  nothing  in  it  of 
reflection,  made  her  first  of  all  knock.  "Come  in,"  said 
a  voice.  She  started  back,  and  held  her  breath.  Again 
that  low:  "Come  in." 

It  seemed  to  her  that  she  must  run,  and  at  the  same 
time  even  more  that  she  must  obey  the  voice.  Oh,  why 
had  she  come?  Taking  uncertain  hold  of  her  courage 
she  pushed  the  door  ajar.  Red  flung  it  wide  by  bound 
ing  in  before  her.  She  had  time  only  to  see  that  a  man, 
half -sitting  up  on  a  camp  bed,  with  a  gray  army  blanket 
over  his  knees,  was  whittling  away  at  a  long,  narrow 
bit  of  flat  wood.  She  hardly  noticed  at  the  moment, 
though  she  remembered  later,  that  when  he  saw  a 
stranger  at  his  door,  he  dropped  his  knife  and  made  an 
automatic  action  to  lay  protecting  hands  on  a  dingy 
bundle,  half  out,  half  under  the  low  bed.  Hildegarde's 
attention  was  of  necessity  centered  in  the  dogs ;  his, 
shaky  and  half -blind,  conducting  defense  from  the  foot 
of  the  bed.  The  girl  laid  hold  on  Red's  collar  and 
dragged  him  back,  although  it  was  plain  now  she  had 
done  so,  that  he  considered  the  decrepit  animal,  half- 
muffled  in  the  blanket,  as  vanquished  already  and  quite  un 
worthy  of  more  consideration  than  could  be  conveyed  in 
a  final  volley  of  scornful  howls.  After  which  relief  to  his 
feelings,  Hildegarde's  fellow-intruder  pointedly  turned 
his  back  and  went  sniffing  about  the  forlorn  little  room. 

"I  am  sorry  we  disturbed  you,"  the  girl  said  to  the 
hollow-eyed,  unkempt  being  on  the  bed.  There  were 
curious  scars  on  the  wasted  face  set  in  its  frame  of  wild, 
tawny  hair  and  wilder,  tawnier  beard.  No  scattering 
of  silver  here  and  there,  but  just  at  the  temples  the  hair 
was  white  as  wool.  As  she  saw  plainer  now,  being  used 


470  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

to  the  dimness,  the  face,  striking  as  it  was,  impressed  her 
chiefly  through  that  quality  of  special  ghastliness  pro 
duced  by  a  pallor  that  shows  clay-like  under  tan.  "I 
thought,"  she  said,  winding  up  her  apology— "I  thought 
the  dog  was  shut  up  here  alone— forgotten. " 

"It  might  come  to  be  like  that,"  he  said,  and  paused 
an  instant,  as  if  for  breath.  When  he  spoke  again  it 
was  less  to  his  visitor  than  as  if  to  soothe  the  ruffled 
feelings  of  the  miserable  beast  at  his  feet.  "It  won't 
be  my  fault,  though,"  he  said.  "I  '11  forget  most  things 
before  I  forget  you,  shan't  I,  Ky  ?" 

"That  is  how  his  master  feels  about  this  dog,  too, 
though  he  's  nothing  but  a  mongrel,"  Hildegarde  said. 
She  was  thinking,  "The  man  is  very  ill." 
"His  master— some  one  prospecting  hereabouts?" 
Briefly  Hildegarde  explained.     As  she  moved  toward 
the  door,  she  caught  an  expression  on  the  sunken  face 
so  arresting  that  straightway  she  said  to  herself:  "What 
is  a  starving  dog  more  than  a  dying  man,  that  I  should 
come  to  help  the  one  and  flee  the  other  ? ' ' 
"I  am  afraid  you  are  very  ill." 
"Yes,"  he  answered  quietly. 

c '  There  's  some  one  at  the  settlement  who  looks  after  you  ? ' ' 
He  smiled  faintly.     "They  've  given  me  up  as  a  bad 
investment. ' ' 

"Oh!"  broke  from  the  girl's  lips,  as  she  leaned  for 
ward  and  then  caught  herself  up.  Was  the  hermit  not 
dead  after  all !  Was  she  face  to  face  at  last  with  the  dis 
coverer  of  the  Mother  Lode  ?  If  so,  she  must  n  't  seem  to 
know.  "Is  n't  there  any  doctor  here?"  she  added  hur 
riedly. 

"There  's  a  fellow  they  call  'doctor.'  " 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  471 

' '  Then  let  me  go  for  him. ' ' 

"He  's  off  prospecting." 

"  When  will  he  be  back ?' ' 

"After  I  'm  gone,  I  guess." 

' l  Oh,  you  are  leaving  here  1 ' '  and  the  moment  she  said 
it  she  felt  the  cruelty  of  the  question. 

But  he  only  answered  "Yes,"  and  left  her  to  miss  or 
to  divine  his  meaning.  Looking  in  his  face  she  forgot 
his  character  of  hermit,  and  fell  to  wondering  whom  he 
had  in  the  world  to  care  about  his  leaving  it.  Instinc 
tively  she  knew  that  a  man  with  such  a  spirit  looking 
out  of  eyes  like  those— for  a  man  like  this  to  die,  meant 
to  some  one  far  away  the  worst  that  could  befall.  And 
suddenly  she  felt  that  she  was  enviable,  being  there,  if 
in  some  way  she  could  help  him.  What  was  there  she 
might  do? 

He  glanced  at  the  foot  of  the  bed,  where  the  old  dog 
lay  at  his  feet.  "When  did  you  say  you  were  going  back 
to  your  ship  7" 

"Not  for  an  hour  or  so,"  she  said.  "More  than  long 
enough  for  me  to— when  did  you  eat  last?" 

' '  If  you  'd  give  me  a  little  water, ' '  he  spoke  huskily. 

She  went  to  a  zinc  bucket  that  stood  in  the  corner. 
"I  'm  afraid  this  is  n't  fresh,"  she  said. 

"Yes.  An  old  fellow  brought  it  only  an  hour  ago. 
There  's  the  cup." 

She  followed  his  eyes  to  a  rusty  condensed-milk  can, 
which  she  filled  and  rinsed,  saying  cheerfully:  "Then 
some  one  does  look  after  you  ? ' ' 

"No,  it  is  n't  after  me  the  old  scoundrel  looks."  With 
great  eyes  darkening,  he  lowered  his  voice :  "  Is  he  hang 
ing  about  still?  A  sort  of  tramp  with— 


472  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"No,  the  man  I  think  you  mean  has  gone  out  to  the 
gulch." 

"H'm!  Tired  of  waiting!  We  saw  that  in  his  face 
when  he  brought  in  the  water,  did  n't  we,  Ky?"  The 
dog  raised  her  head.  "Yes,  he  was  n't  anything  like  as 
afraid  of  you,  Ky,  as  he  used  to  be.  Time  's  short. ' '  He 
pulled  himself  up  and  fell  to  work  with  a  knife  upon 
the  piece  of  wood  that  lay  on  the  gray  blanket. 

Suspiciousness  has  made  him  brain-sick,  thought  the 
girl.  She  dried  the  dripping  can  on  her  handkerchief 
as  she  looked  over  at  the  dog.  "Poor  Ky.  What  hap 
pened  to  her  eye?" 

"Left  it  up  yonder."  He  glanced  through  the  open 
door  to  the  white  surf  curling  up  above  the  tundra,  and 
with  his  wild  head  he  made  a  little  motion  to  the  north. 
But  not  even  long  enough  to  drink  did  he  stop  his  fever 
ish  whittling.  As  she  put  the  cup  on  a  tin  cracker-box, 
set  within  his  reach,  she  saw  there  was  a  little  heap  of 
shavings  and  splinters  in  the  hollow  of  the  blanket  be 
tween  the  man's  gaunt  knees,  and  she  noticed  that  he 
held  his  knife  with  grotesque  awkwardness.  Then,  with 
an  inward  shrinking,  saw  that  to  every  finger  but  two, 
the  final  joint  or  more  was  lacking.  "How  dreadfully 
you  've  been  hurt. ' ' 

He  looked  up  and  then  followed  the  direction  of  her 
glance.  "Yes,  I  got  a  good  deal  mauled"— only  half- 
articulate  the  iterated  burden— "up  yonder." 

His  voice  made  her  heart  ache  for  pity  of  such  utter 
weakness.  The  task  he  had  set  himself  looked  as  painful 
as  impossible.  Yet  remembering  the  solace  whittling 
seems  to  be  to  certain  backwoodsmen:  "Do  you  do  that 
for  amusement?"  she  asked  diffidently. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  473 

' '  If  that  's  what  it  is,  I  shan  't  lack  entertainment. ' ' 

She  looked  wonderingly  in  his  face. 

"I  was  weeks  before  cutting  up  a  little  wood.  But 
somebody  stole  it.  Scarcer  than  gold  up  here. ' ' 

Oh,  yes,  the  discoverer  of  the  Mother  Lode  had  stores 
of  the  precious  metal  hidden  away  somewhere.  The 
skulker  among  the  rocks— he  knew ! 

"Let  me  help."  She  went  closer  with  outstretched 
hand".  But  he  started  and  dropped  the  clumsily  held 
wood.  It  all  happened  in  an  instant.  Hildegarde,  fol 
lowing  the  look  on  the  wild  face  he  was  bending  down, 
saw  that  his  concern  was  not  for  the  precious  and  sole 
piece  of  timber  in  the  hut,  but  for  the  oilskin  bundle 
under  the  bed,  which  her  dog  was  in  the  act  of  investi 
gating.  The  half-blind  beast  on  the  blanket  saw,  too. 
She  made  one  bound  and  fell  upon  Hildegarde 's  com 
panion  with  a  fury  that  filled  the  narrow  space  with 
noise  of  battle.  The  sick  man  called  off  his  dog,  while 
Hildegarde  reviled  hers  and  tugged  at  his  collar. 

When  peace  was  again  restored,  "I  must  take  him 
away, ' '  said  his  mistress.  ' '  He  's  behaving  very  badly. ' ' 

"No,  it  will  be  all  right  if  I—  "  The  sick  man  leaned 
still  further  over  the  side  of  the  narrow  bed,  and  fastened 
the  hand  Hildegarde  could  n't  bear  to  look  at  under  the 
knotted  oilskin. 

As  she  saw  him  feebly  straining  to  lift  it:  "Oh,  let 
me, ' '  she  said,  and  bent  to  help  him. 

Again  his  dog  flew  to  the  rescue,  while  the  man  him 
self,  with  a  desperate  final  effort,  almost  snatched  the 
bundle  from  under  her  fingers.  "I— I  beg  your  par 
don,"  he  said  panting,  and  again  he  made  his  dog  lie 
down. 


474  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

But  Hildegarde 's  feelings  were  a  little  hurt.  The 
normal  miner,  she  had  always  understood,  showed  people 
his  gold — even  trusted  them  to  handle  it. 

' '  Poor  old  Ky , ' '  the  sick  man  went  on  apologetically ; 
"she  has  got  so  used  to  guarding  this"— he  was  himself 
positively  hugging  the  unsavory  bundle— "she  can't  see 
any  other  creature  come  near  it  without— 

"You  're  quite  as  bad,"  Hildegarde  said  to  herself, 
but  a  glance  at  the  face,  with  the  look  of  doom  in  the 
eyes,  made  her  set  down  his  excitement,  and  the  failure 
in  fairly  judging  her,  to  the  darkening  of  all  things  in 
the  gathering  shadow. 

' '  I  suppose  you  think  I  have  something  very  valuable 
here  ?  "  he  said,  suspiciously. 

"It  would  n't  be  the  first  time  in  Alaska  that  some 
thing  valuable  has  been  wrapped  in  rags  and  left  lying 
in  a  corner." 

"Something  like  what  I  've  got  here?"  he  asked,  as 
he  took  tighter  hold  on  the  oilskin. 

He  should  not  think  she  was  curious  about  his  gold 
dust  and  his  nuggets.  She  looked  at  Ky  climbing  with 
difficulty  back  to  her  place  at  the  foot  of  the  bed,  and 
pointedly  changed  the  subject.  "Your  dog  is  very 
lame." 

He  nodded.    ' '  Got  one  of  her  paws  crushed. ' ' 

To  distract  him  from  his  brain-sick  anxiety  about  the 
bundle,  "How  'Was  that?"  Hildegarde  asked.  No  an 
swer  this  time,  only  that  same  northward  motion.  ' '  She 
must  be  very  old, ' '  Hildegarde  pursued. 

"No." 

"Your  dog,  I  mean.    Surely  she  is  old." 

"No.    She  got  like  that— up— " 


I  suppose  you  think  I  have  something  very  valuable  here  f ' " 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  475 

He  still  clutched  the  oilskin  with  such  anxious  hands 
that  Hildegarde  felt  it  mere  humanity  to  win  him  to 
forget  his  fears.  So  she  looked  away  from  the  gaunt 
figure,  over  the  threshold  and  over  the  surf  to  where  the 
white  sails  of  the  Beluga  shone. 

"I  've  been  'up  yonder/  too,"  she  said. 

"What!" 

"Yes,  I  Ve  seen  the  North  Siberian  shore  quite  plain. 
I  've  been  as  far  as  the  Bering  Straits. ' ' 

' '  Oh,  the  Bering  Straits ! "  he  echoed,  as  one  inwardly 
amused  at  a  traveler  who  should  boast  of  getting  as  far 
as  the  adjoining  county. 

"Yes,  and— and  I  'd  like  to  go  further  still." 

"Better  not— better  not." 

"But,  of  course,  I  would!"  She  put  her  hand  in  the 
pocket  of  her  long  cloak  and  drew  out  the  "latest  map" 
of  extreme  northwestern  Alaska.  "I  'm  like  the  rest. 
The  more  I  see  up  here,  the  more  I  want  to  see."  She 
sat  down  on  the  earthen  floor  just  inside  the  threshold, 
and  spread  out  the  yard  square  tinted  paper.  As  she 
bent  over  it,  ""What  part  of  the  map  lures  you  most?" 
she  asked,  wondering  if  she  would  hear  where  was  the 
home  of  this  curious  being  dying  up  here  alone. 

As  he  did  not  answer  at  once,  she  looked  up,  laying 
her  hand  on  the  paper  and  saying,  "This  for  me." 

She  saw  him  take  surer  hold  on  the  packet  he  was 
guarding,  and  he  leaned  across  it  to  see  precisely  what 
portion  of  the  earth's  surface  her  hand  was  covering. 

"You  want  to  know  the  name  of  the  most  interesting 
country  in  the  world  1 ' '  she  asked  smiling. 

"Well,  what  do  you  say?"    He  seemed  to  humor  her. 

' '  The  name  of  the  most  interesting  country  on  the  face 


476  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

of  the  globe  is  under  my  hand."  She  lifted  it.  He 
peered  down.  She  pushed  the  rustling  paper  across  the 
uneven  floor,  till  leaning  over  he  could  read,  in  big  black 
letters,  the  word  "UNEXPLORED." 

' '  Ah ! "  he  said  softly,  with  as  great  a  light  in  his  face 
as  if  those  letters  had  indeed  spelled  home.  "You  feel 
that?  I  did  n't  know  that  women —  He  broke  off,  and 
absently  took  a  fresh  hold  on  the  bundle,  as  though 
anticipating  some  adroit  attempt  upon  his  treasure. 

His  foolishness  about  that  packet  had  got  upon  Hilde- 
garde's  nerves.  "People  who  don't  know  them  think 
Chinamen  are  all  alike.  Men  who  know  little  of  women 
think  the  same  of  us. ' ' 

He  smiled.  "Do  you  mean  you  realize  how  precious 
those  blank  spaces  are?"  Again  he  craned  weakly  over 
the  bundle  and  stared  down  at  the  map.  The  thought 
again  occurred  to  her  that  his  look  was  like  the  look 
a  wanderer  turns  home.  Wondering  about  him  she  hardly 
listened  to  the  words  he  was  saying,  how  the  kingdom 
of  the  unknown  shrinks  and  shrinks  and  soon  shall 
vanish  from  the  maps— worse  still,  own  no  dominion 
any  more  over  the  minds  of  men. 

Whether  he  was  indulging  some  fantasy  of  fever 
she  could  not  tell,  but  the  scarred  face  wore  a  look  so 
high  and  sorrowful  that  she  found  herself  saying, 
"Surely  the  only  value  of  the  empty  space  is  that  some 
man  may  one  day  set  a  name  there." 

He  threw  her  a  pitying  look.  And  he  stroked  the 
oilskin  as  a  child  might  caress  a  kitten. 

"I  see,"  she  said,  trying  in  self-defense  to  be  a  little 
superior,  "you  don't,  after  all,  sympathize  with  the  ex 
plorer  spirit." 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  477 

At  which  the  strange  eyes  rewarded  her  with  sudden 
smiling.  "If  you  mean  you  do,"  he  said,  "think  for  a 
moment  what  a  power  the  unknown  has  been  in  history. 
Think  what  it  's  done  for  people— a  mere  empty  space 
upon  the  map— 

"Yes,"  she  threw  in,  "it  has  made  heroes." 
"It  has  made  men."    But  for  all  the  restrained  quiet 
ness  of  tone  his  look  evoked  a  glorious  company. 

' '  Yes, ' '  she  agreed.  ' '  It  made  Columbus,  and  it  made 
Cortez.'  It  made  Magellan,  Drake,  and  Cook,  Living 
stone  and— 

"And  all  the  millions  more,"  he  interrupted,  still  on 
that  quiet  note,  "who  only  planned  or  dreamed."  But 
while  he  spoke  his  maimed  fingers  wandered  over  the 
oilskin— a  brain-sick  miser  guarding  his  gold.  And 
though  she  listened  to  what  he  said,  her  eyes,  against  her 
will,  kept  surreptitiously  revisiting  the  uncouth  bundle 
he  was  fondling  with  abhorrent  hands. 

"I  feel  like  a  son  of  that  land"— one  hand  left  the 
bundle  an  instant  and  pointed  down  at  the  map— "The 
Unexplored.  Like  a  man  who  sees  his  mother  country 
filched  from  him  bit  by  bit,  parceled  out  and  brought 
under  subjection.  Yes"— he  raised  his  voice  suddenly 
to  such  a  note  as  set  the  girl's  nerves  unaccountably  to 
thrilling— "yes,  I  resent  the  partition  of  that  empire. 
It  is  the  oldest  on  the  earth.  I  am  glad  I  shall  not  see 
its  passing."  He  leaned  back,  and  a  grayness  gathered 
on  his  face  as  he  ended:  "Many  a  man  will  be  without 
a  country,  many  a  soul  will  be  homeless  when  the  last 
province  of  that  kingdom  yields." 

She  only  nodded,  but  he  suddenly  began  afresh,  as 
though  she  had  contributed  something  convincing.     "I 


478  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

have  never  talked  of  these  things  to  a  woman,  but  since 
you  seem  to  feel  the  significance  of—  He  broke  of, 
and  then  slowly,  "It  might  be  you  could  help  me,"  he 
said. 

"How  could  I—" 

Still  clinging  feverishly  to  the  knotted  oilskin,  he 
dragged  himself  with  difficulty  to  an  upright  posture 
and  craned  forward  to  stare  through  the  open  door. 
Not  this  time  northward  solely,  but  down  the  beach  as 
well  as  up. 

' '  What  are  you  looking  for  ? ' '  asked  the  girl. 

As  he  sat  there  huddled,  silent,  she  became  conscious 
that  he  was  listening— listening  with  that  sort  of  strained 
intentness  that  almost  creates  sound,  does  create  it  to  the 
sense  accessible  to  hypnotic  influence. 

' '  Who  is  that  outside  ? "  he  said  very  low. 

"No  one,"  she  answered,  though  it  seemed  to  her,  too, 
there  must  be  some  one  there. 

"Look  out  and  see." 

As  she  got  up  to  obey  him,  ' '  But  you  won 't  go  away, ' ' 
he  said  suddenly. 

"No,  only  as  far  as — 

"Don't  go  out  of  sight !"  There  was  an  excitement  in 
his  voice  that  gave  her  a  moment's  fear  of  him.  Out  of 
the  dank  little  hut  his  voice  followed  her  into  the  sun 
shine  :  "  Is  he  there  again  ? ' ' 

"No  one,"  she  answered,  "no  one  at  all!    Except— 

To  the  south,  on  the  edge  of  the  tiny  settlement,  a 
group  of  Esquimaux.  It  must  have  been  their  voices  his 
quick  ear  had  caught  now  and  then  above  the  surf. 

Northward,  up  the  curving  beach,  two  men  calking  a 
boat.  But  though  they  stood  out  vivid  in  that  wonderful 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  479 

light,  Hildegarde  knew  they  must  be  half  a  mile  away; 
and  so  she  told  him. 

"Is  that  all?" 

Nothing  more.  Not  a  creature  on  the  treeless  hill 
rising  behind  the  hovel.  In  front  of  where  the  girl 
stood  no  soul  nearer  than  where  the  bark  Beluga  set  her 
transfigured  sails  against  the  western  limit  of  the  world. 
Between  her  and  that  sole  link  with  her  own  life,  only 
the  long  barrier  of  the  battling  surf.  From  within,  the 
feeble  voice  saying  indistinguishable  words  that  yet  con 
veyed  some  feverish  purpose.  A  sudden  temptation 
seized  the  girl  to  call  her  dog  and  run. 

"You  are  sure"— the  weak  voice  came  to  meet  her  as 
she  turned  back— "sure  there  is  n't  an  old  man  about- 
fellow  with  a  hungry  face  and  a  long,  lank  beard  ? ' ' 

"And  an  hour-glass  and  a  scythe,"  she  filled  out  the 
picture  to  herself.  Yes.  One  like  that  is  lurking  here  at 
the  door,  and  no  man  can  bar  him  out  and  none  refuse 
to  follow  at  his  call.  But  aloud,  "No  one,"  she  said. 

"Then  come  in  and  shut  the  door."  And  again  she 
thought  of  flight,  and  again  put  the  impulse  by.  But 
she  said  if  the  door  were  shut  she  must  go,  and  made  her 
excuse  the  need  to  keep  an  eye  out  for  her  friend.  Then 
she  sat  down  as  before,  where  she  could  command  the 
beach. 

The  sick  man  was  obviously  ill-pleased  and  not  a  little 
scornful.  ' '  You  will  understand  why  I  don 't  want  to  be 
overheard  when  I  tell  you—  "  Again  he  sent  the  search 
ing  glance  into  that  square  of  the  world  the  driftwood 
lintel  framed,  and  his  voice  was  half  a  whisper. 
"You  '11  understand  when  I  tell  you  I  have  a  legacy  to 
leave. ' '  He  waited. 


480  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"Yes,"  said  Hildegarde. 

' '  How  did  you  know ! "  he  demanded,  and  the  eyes 
were  less  friendly. 

"Oh,  I  did  n't  know." 

"You  suspected— 

"Well,  most  people,  however  poor,  have  something  to 
leave,  however  little. ' ' 

He  lifted  his  hand  to  silence  the  platitude,  and  his 
whisper  reached  her  clear  and  sharp :  "I  am  leaving 
more  than  ever  a  man  left  before. ' ' 

It  was  true  then  about  the  Mother  Lode.  She 
waited,  hardly  breathing.  He  had  said  she  could 
help  him.  He  wanted  a  letter  written  or  witness 
to  a  will,  but  he  had  fallen  back  upon  that 
strained  listening.  "You  have  children?"  Hildegarde 
asked. 

He  made  a  barely  perceptible  motion,  no. 

"Brothers  and  sisters?"  She  tried  to  help  his  mem 
ory. 

"No." 

"Who,  then?" 

"My  legacy  's  too  great  to  leave  to  any  individual." 
Hildegarde 's  eyes  kindled  with  excitement.  All  the 
talk  about  Nome  had  given  her  a  sense  of  living  in  an 
atmosphere  of  mighty  enterprise,  of  giant  losses,  and  of 
fabulous  gain.  She  was  primed  to  hear  of  lucky  mil 
lions  stumbled  on  by  chance. 

"You  want  to  make  a  bequest  to  the  nation?"  Why 
was  he  hesitating,  she  wondered  impatiently,  as  he  flung 
again  that  same  intent  look  out  of  doors  ?  She  knew  he 
could  see  nothing  but  the  wild,  white  horses  climbing  the 
rocky  shore  to  look  across  the  tundra.  She  knew  he  could 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  481 

hear  nothing  but  the  thunder  of  their  hoof -beats  on  the 
beach. 

At  last  he  spoke.  "They  said  my  trouble  was  ambi 
tion.  ' '  And  still  his  ears  waited  for  some  sound  beyond 
Hildegarde's  hearing,  and  still  his  eyes  saw  more  than 
hers. 

He  was  silent  so  long  she  adventured  in  the  dark, ' '  Did 
you  leave  ambition  'up  yonder,'  too?" 

"Yes,  up  yonder!"  But  he  brought  out  the  words 
triumphantly,  and  he  paused  upon  a  broken  breath  still 
listening.  "Ky,"  he  whispered,  "the  lady  likes  explor 
ing,  but  she  's  afraid  to  shut  the  door.  Go  out,  Ky,  and 
see  if  that  old  villain  's  hanging  about.  Ky!" 

The  beast  took  her  nose  out  of  the  blanket,  and  seemed 
to  implore  him  to  reconsider  his  command. 

"Go  out  and  explore!  Go— once  more!"  There  was 
a  curious  gentle  note  in  the  weak  voice. 

"Don't  send  her  out,"  Hildegarde  pleaded.  "My 
dog  's  out  there  now.  Poor  Ky."  She  was  conscious 
that  her  kindness  for  the  maimed  beast  pleased  the 
owner. 

1  i  Have  you  ever  cared  about  a  dog  1 "  he  said. 

"Well,  if  I  have  n't,  I  know  some  one  who  has,  and 
that  's  Red 's  master.  Why  do  you  ask  me  ? " 

"Because  I  find  myself  with  all  my  wealth  wanting 
two  things  at  the  last. ' ' 

"What  things?" 

"A  little  fire  that  I  have  n't  strength  to  make,  and  a 
friend  for  Ky." 

"I  '11  help  you  about  the  fire."  She  reached  out  and 
picked  up  the  fallen  pieces  of  wood. 

While  she  was  opening  her  knife,  "I  believe,"  he  said, 

31 


482  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

''yes,  I  believe  you  would  help  me  about  Ky— if  you 
knew. ' ' 

11  Help  you,  how  1" 

He  fastened  his  eyes  on  the  girl's  face.  "Ky  is  one 
of  us, ' '  he  said  very  low. 

"What  do  you  mean?" 

' '  Only  she  is  better  at  the  game. ' ' 

Hildegarde  leaned  nearer  to  catch  the  husky  words. 
"No  one  who  ever  braved  the  North,  no  one  who  ever 
grappled  with  the  ice,  not  one  of  them  all  has  done  it. 
more  courageously  than  Ky."  The  shadow-ringed  eyes 
sought  the  girl's  again.  "Nobody  could  be  quite  in 
different  to  Ky  who  cared  about— who—  He  broke  off, 
exhausted  by  his  fruitless  effort  to  sit  upright.  He 
dropped  forward  on  his  elbows  and  rested  his  bearded 
chin  in  his  hands.  The  tawny  tide  poured  in  streams 
through  his  fingers,  and  hid  the  horror  of  them.  ''To 
morrow,"  he  said,  with  his  eyes  on  Hildegarde,  "to 
morrow  Ky  will  be  the  sole  survivor  of  the  only  expedi 
tion  that  ever  reached  the  Pole. ' ' 


CHAPTER  XXIV 

[ILENT  the  girl  sat  there.  But  senses  less 
alert  than  the  hermit's  would  have  felt  the 
passion  of  wonder  that  held  her  motionless. 
For  all  the  world  of  difference  between  these 
two,  the  same  light  was  shining  in  each  face. 

"How  does  the  time  go?"  He  made  a  movement  to 
ward  his  pocket,  and  then  dropped  his  hand.  "Curious 
how  I  still  forget-I  left  it-"  Again  the  motion. 
"Will  you  put  your  watch  where  I  can  see  it?" 

"Oh,  go  on;  go  on!"  she  urged.  "My  companion 
won 't  go  back  without  me. ' ' 

"Yes,  you  have  plenty  of  time.  But  for  me  there  '11 
be  barely  enough,"  and  the  face  that  he  turned  an  in 
stant  toward  the  ship-  Oh,  beyond  doubting,  his  time 
was  short! 

Out  of  her  cow-boy  hat  she  drew  a  long  pin,  and  going 
to  the  foot  of  the  bed  she  thrust  the  hatpin  several  inches 
into  the  peat  wall  above  where  the  dog  lay.  But  her  near 
presence  was  so  resented  by  the  great  explorer,  Ky,  that 
before  the  watch  could  be  hung  upon  the  pin,  Hildegarde 
must  needs  retreat.  She  remembered  the  luncheon  in 
her  pocket,  and  offered  Ky  a  share.  No;  Ky  wanted 
nothing  of  a  stranger. 

"Throw  it  down  by  the  door,"  said  her  master,  and  it 
was  done.  When  Hildegarde  had  retired,  the  dog  came 


483 


484  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

down,  and  when  he  turned  his  blind  eye  about  again,  lo, 
a  shining  thing  upon  the  wall. 

"  So ! "  the  sick  man  sank  back  satisfied.  ' '  Now  to  get 
you  to  help  me  about  Ky,  I  must  put  twenty  years  into 
an  hour.  More  than  twenty,  for  I  can't  remember  when 
I  began  to  think  about  finding  the  Pole.  I  played  at  it 
all  my  boyhood.  I  've  worked  at  it  ever  since. ' '  An  in 
stant  Hildegarde  dropped  her  shrinking  eyes.  For  he 
was  putting  out  that  maimed  hand  for  the  cup.  She 
heard  the  grate  of  rusty  tin  on  the  cracker-box,  as  his 
cleared  voice  went  on,  "I  began  by  going  in  a  revenue 
cutter  to  Port  Barrow;  and  I  had  been  in  two  arctic 
expeditions  before  the  one  I  'm  telling  you  about.  But 
on  both  of  those  others  I  was  the  one  man  who  was  n't 
going  for  the  Pole.  I  was  going  for  experience.  I  never 
believed  my  chiefs  would  get  there,  but  I  always  believed 
I  would— later.  I  had  theories. " 

"Oh,  I  wish  you  had  known  a  friend  of  ours— 

"I  had  a  friend  of  my  own.  The  year  after  I  got  back 
from  the  second  voyage,  I  met  one  night,  at  a  club  in 
New  York,  a  young  Russian- American  who  was  nearly 
as  keen  about  polar  problems  as  I  was.  We  talked  arctic 
exploration  all  that  winter  of  '95  and  '96.  We  both 
believed  tremendously  in  Nansen. ' ' 

' 'So  did  he— ow  friend." 

' '  We  agreed  we  'd  have  given  ten  years  of  life  to  have 
had  the  honor  of  going  along  with  the  Norwegian.  But 
he  had  been  away  now  nearly  three  years.  How  far  had 
he  got?  What  had  happened?  Even  experts  began  to 
say :  '  Another  expedition  crushed  in  the  arctic  ice. '  But 
neither  my  Russian  nor  I  believed  that  Nansen  was  dead, 
and  we  began  privately  to  discuss  a  rescue-party.  We 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  485 

agreed  that  if  we  carried  out  our  idea,  and  if  we  found 
Nansen  unsuccessful,  we  'd  offer  him  our  ship  to  come 
home  in  and  we— we  'd  push  straight  on.  Ours 
should  n't  be  any  trumpeted  'dash  for  the  Pole'— how  we 
loathed  the  cheap  gallantry  of  the  phrase!"  The  voice 
that  had  flared  up  an  instant  fell  again  as  he  said:  "We 
knew  something,  even  then,  of  the  snail's  pace  of  that 
laboring  on ;  that  doing  battle  for  every  yard ;  that  night 
mare  of  crawling  forward  inch  by  inch— only  so,  we 
knew,  might  a  man  make  his  'dash  for  the  Pole.7  But 
the  plan  of  setting  off  without  saying  to  any  one  what  it 
was  we  were  hoping  to  do  supplied  my  Russian  and  me 
with  our  first  condition  for  making  the  attempt. ' ' 

Was  it  indeed  only  water  in  the  cup,  that  after  an 
other  draught  of  it  he  should  seem  to  throw  off  weakness 
as  you  might  a  burdensome  cloak?  "My  friend  had 
money,  so  had  I.  No  need  of  a  public  appeal.  No  need 
to  beat  the  big  drum  and  talk  tall.  Both  of  us  had  felt 
the  irony  of  each  explorer's  coming  back  to  assure  the 
world  that  he  had  never  meant  to  find  the  Pole.  What 
he  had  gone  for  was  exploration  of  the  ice-fields  this 
side.  Ha  !  Ha ! "  It  was  strange  that  such  a  feeble  little 
laugh  could  give  out  such  a  world  of  irony.  "Or  else, 
what  he  'd  gone  for  was  to  ascertain  the  salinity  of  the 
polar  seas,  or  to  determine  the  trend  of  arctic  currents. 
Or  to  explain"— again  that  hardly  audible  laughter— 
"how  the  Jeanette's  oilskin  breeches  got  to  the  Green 
land  coast;  anything  under  heaven,  except  reaching  the 
paltry  Pole.  So  as  we  knew  we  were  made  of  no  better 
stuff,  if  as  good,  as  our  predecessors,  we  said  that  we, 
too,  if  we  came  back  with  only  some  deep  sea  dredgings, 
a  few  photographs  of  ice-pressure  effects— sketches  of 


486  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

Aurora  Borealis,  and  a  store  of  polar  bearskins  and 
walrus  tusks,  we,  too,  would  find  ourselves  pointing  to 
these  as  the  treasures  we  'd  staked  life  and  reputation 
for.  So  hard  it  is  to  suffer  the  extremity  and  still  have 
to  say 'I  failed'!" 

He  lay  silent  so  long  that  Hildegarde  quoted  Cheviot. 
"They  say  it  's  harder  for  an  American." 

"What  is?" 

"To  accept  defeat.  Harder  for  us  than  for  the 
others." 

"Why  do  they  say  that?" 

"I  Ve  heard  it  's  because  we  make  such  a  fetish  of 
success."  Still  he  lay  there  silent.  It  was  as  if  the  oil 
in  the  lamp  had  failed.  "Yes,  yours  was  a  good  plan," 
she  said.  "Even  those  others,  the  Old-World  people, 
that  they  say  are  soberer  than  we—  She  saw  that  he 
turned  his  hollow  eyes  toward  her,  listening.  "If 
even  they  made  excuses,  and  shirked  saying  they  'd 
failed— yours  was  the  best—  Oh,  it  was  a  splendid 
plan!" 

"Are  you  saying  we  're  a  nation  of  boasters?" 

Good!  that  had  roused  him.  "Do  you  say  we  are 
not?" 

"We  are  everything  under  the  sun:  most  vain  and 
braggart;  most  discreet  and  self-effacing;  most  childish 
and  obvious ;  most  subtle  and  complex.  The  extreme  of 
anything,  good  or  evil,  that  's  the  American."  His  eyes 
found  out  the  tiny  watch  face  on  the  peat  wall.  Ah,  that 
was  the  tonic  that  was  acting  like  a  cordial  mixed  with 
magic.  Right  or  wrong,  he  was  under  the  dominion  of 
a  terror  that  this  last  flickering  up  of  energy  would  fail 
before  he  had  turned  it  to  account.  Even  to  remember 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  487 

that  small  shining  disk  seemed  to  nerve  him  anew.  Each 
look  a  lash.  It  whipped  him  on. 

"As  I  Ve  said,  my  Tatar  and  I  laid  our  heads  to 
gether  and  agreed.  'For  fear  we  fall  into  the  old  snare, 
we  won't  say  we  're  going  at  all,'  not  even  to  find  Nan- 
sen,  for  fear  we  should  promise  too  much.  We  would 
make  the  great  attempt  under  the  guise  of  a  whaling 
expedition.  My  Russian  had  already  sent  out  two,  and 
had  once  gone  along  with  one  of  them.  I  had  spent  a 
winter  with  the  Samoyedes. ' ' 

"What!  You  did  that?"  His  eyes,  though  not  his 
mind,  took  in  the  girl's  breathless  agitation.  He  paused, 
but  his  thoughts  were  too  far  away.  "I  thought  only 
one  man  had  ever —  "  began  the  girl  trembling,  and  then : 
"Go  on;  go  on!" 

"We  were  both  still  young.  Yes,  six  years  ago  I  was 
young ;  and  hard  as  a  husky.  But  not  so  hard  as  a  man 
need  be  who  goes  exploring  in  the  mild  climate  of  the 
drawing-room. ' ' 

Hildegarde  bent  toward  him,  with  wildly  beating 
heart. 

"We  were  just  on  the  point  of  chartering  our  ship, 
when  one  evening—"  He  looked  through  the  peat  wall 
a  thousand  leagues. 

"One  evening — what?" 

' 1 1  saw  a  face.  A  girl 's  soft  face,  but  it  cut  the  cables 
of  my  ship  and  set  her  afloat— drifting,  derelict,  for  all 
I  cared.  A  little  doll's  face.  But  it  shut  out  everything 
else  under  the  skies ! ' ' 

Oh,  Bella,  Bella,  was  it  yours— that  face?  "Go  on," 
breathed  the  girl  at  the  door. 

"When  her  people  said  she  should  never  marry  a  man 


488  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

who  might  any  day  go  off  on  one  of  these  protracted 
voyages,  I  looked  at  the  face,  and  I  said  I  would  never 
explore  again."  The  glazed  eyes  turned  to  Hildegarde, 
but  it  was  the  old  bright  vision  they  saw,  not  this  newer, 
softer  presence,  with  wet  cheeks,  by  the  door. 

' '  I  told  my  Russian  to  draw  on  me  for  half  the  funds, 
and  to  find  another  fellow-traveler.  But  she  was  too 
young  to  marry,  they  said.  We  must  wait  a  year.  I 
said  I  would  wait.  When  the  year  was  half  gone,  I  was 
in  London— because  the  face  was  there."  Still  looking 
through  the  wall  he  groped  for  the  cup.  Hildegarde 
rose,  and  put  it  in  his  hands.  Oh  poor,  poor  hands !  No 
need  to  turn  shuddering  away.  They  were  softly 
wrapped  from  her  sight  in  a  mist  of  pitiful  tears. 

He  gave  her  back  the  cup.  "We  had  been  to  a  skat 
ing  party,"  he  said.  Something  grotesque  conjured  by 
the  contrast  of  that  light  phrase  wafted  out  of  a  butterfly 
world  to  fall  in  such  a  place  at  such  an  hour  made  for 
the  unreality,  not  of  far-off  London,  nor  of  parties 
where  pretty  ladies  play  at  being  in  a  world  of  ice— the 
conjuration  merely  lifted  the  dim  hut  and  its  wild 
occupant  into  the  realm  of  the  phantasmagoric.  The 
girl  saw  all  in  a  wavering  dimness,  shot  dazzlingly  with 
splinters  of  sunshine.  But  the  man  went  on  in  that 
level  tone :  "  I  remember  her  saying  it  was  the  first  party 
given  in  London  on  artificial  ice— an  absurd  affair.  But 
she  said:  'Was  n't  it  nice  of  me  to  get  you  an  invita 
tion,  too?  It  will  seem  quite  like  going  to  your  horrid 
North  Pole/  " 

How  plain  Bella's  voice  sounded  in  the  room.  That 
was  why  he  was  smiling.  Bella  could  always  bring  that 
look  into  the  eyes  of  men. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  489 

"I  said,  'quite  like  the  North  Pole.'  And  I  went  and 
skated  with  her.  Afterward,  at  the  door,  I  had  just 
seen  her  and  her  mother  into  the  carriage,  when  my  eye 
fell  on  the  orange-colored  bill  of  the  'Pall  Mall  Ga 
zette.'  And  three  words  printed  there  blared  out  like 
trumpets. 

'NEWS  FROM  NANSEN.' 

'He  's  found  it!'  I  said  to  myself— 'Nansen  's  found 
the  Pole ! '  and  I  could  have  flung  up  my  hat  and  cried 
hurrah  in  the  sober  street.  As  I  called  to  the  newsboy 
I  was  ashamed  of  my  voice.  I  thought  people  would 
notice  how  it  shook.  When  I  pulled  my  hand  out  of  my 
pocket  it  trembled  so  I  dropped  the  coin  and  it  rolled 
away  into  the  street.  The  boy  ran  after  it,  and  I  damned 
him  for  his  pains.  'Never  mind!  Give  me  a  paper!'  I 
called  out.  But  the  boy  rarn  on.  As  I  stood  there  wait 
ing  for  him  to  disentangle  himself  from  the  traffic  and 
come  back,  I  seemed  to  live  a  lifetime.  How  had  he 
done  it,  that  splendid  fellow,  Nansen?  What  had  it 
been  like?  Well,  soon  I  should  know.  The  knowledge 
that  had  cost  so  much,  soon  I  should  have  it  in  my  hand 
—for  a  penny !  The  awful  majesty  of  the  upper  regions 
fell  away." 

With  a  growing  excitement  painfully  the  sick  man 
lifted  himself  up.  "It  was  then,"  he  said,  "then— a 
queer  thing  happened."  He  seemed  to  wait  for  some 
thing.  Turning  to  the  girl,  "You  see,  this  was  the 
moment  I  'd  been  living  for  in  a  way. ' ' 

"Of  course;  of  course." 

"And  yet,  now  that  it  had  come,  my  spirit  had  gone 


490  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

down  like  the  sounding  lead  on  a  deep-sea  bottom.  I 
stood  there  in  the  street  with  a  sense  of  unmitigable  loss. 
Something  so  sudden  and  acute  that  I  did  n't  myself 
understand  at  first  what  was  going  on  in  me.  For  it 
was  something  quite  apart  from  any  feeling  that  I  'd 
like  to  have  been  the  one  to  do  the  thing.  There  had 
been  for  months  no  question  of  that.  No.  It  was  just 
a  poignant  realization  that  almost  the  last  of  the  jealous 
old  world's  secrets  had  been  forced  out  of  her  keeping. 
This  thing  that  men  had  dreamed  about  before  ever 
they  'd  girdled  the  globe — it  was  no  more  the  stuff  of 
dreams.  The  thought  of  Captain  Cook  and  Franklin 
flashed  across  my  mind,  and  I  remembered  the  men  of 
the  Jeanette.  But  it  was  n't  till  I  remembered  the  men 
unborn  that  I  measured  the  full  extent  of  the  disaster. 
The  generations  to  come  would  never  know  what  it  had 
stood  for— this  goal  the  Norwegian  had  won.  They 
would  n't  have  to  spend  even  a  penny  to  hear  all  about 
it.  It  would  be  thrust  at  them,  this  shining  and  terri 
ble  thing  men  had  died  to  gain— one  leaden  fact  the 
more,  conned  in  a  heavy  book,  stripped  to  the  lean 
dimensions  of  a  date!  Discovery  of  America,  discovery 
of  the  Pole— who  thrills  over  these  things  when  they 
are  done?  And  now  the  newsboy  was  coming  slowly 
back,  rubbing  the  mud  off  my  half-crown.  In  a  second 
I  should  be  reading  how  the  last  great  stronghold  of 
wonder  was  destroyed.  'Well,  the  world  's  grown 
poorer!'  I  said  to  myself,  and  I  counted  my  change, 
thinking  less  of  Nansen's  news  than  of  those  men  of  the 
future.  He  had  taken  from  them  the  finest  playground 
ever  found  for  the  imagination— the  last  great  field  for 
grim  adventuring. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  491 

"I  opened  the  paper  and  read  that  Nansen  had  turned 
back  before  reaching  the  eighty-seventh  parallel. 
"The  Pole  was  still  to  be  found." 

AH,  Bella,  when  you  saw  that  look  go  traveling  so  far, 
so  far,  you  must  have  known  that  he  would  follow.  Poor 
little  Bella ! 

Under  those  vision-filled  eyes,  the  crippled  dog,  still 
sleeping,  made  a  muffled  sound.  "Ky  is  dreaming," 
said  the  sick  man,  absently,  "that  she  hears  a  seal  cry 
ing  'Ho-o-o,'  with  his  nose  above  the  ice.  Or  she  thinks 
she  hears  the  'Kah!  kah!  sah!  sah!'  of  the  auks.  So  do 
I,-  sometimes. ' ' 

"But  you  promised  'the  face'  you  would  n't  think  of 
the  arctic  any  more." 

"Yes,"  and  weakness  of  the  flesh  or  weight  of  memory 
held  him  a  moment  silent.  ' '  She  always  said  that  if  the 
Norwegian  had  been  successful  she  and  I  would  never 
have  quarreled.  She  wrote  that  in  every  letter  after  I 
left  her.  I  don 't  know.  She  was  very  young.  She  never 
understood"— he  glanced  at  Hildegarde— "never  under 
stood  what  was  the  most  interesting  place  on  the  map. 
She  thought  it  was  Paris."  He  smiled.  "Maybe  she 
was  right.  I  don't  know.  All  I  do  know  is"— and  a 
subtle  animation  invaded  voice  and  air— "a  few  weeks 
after  I  read  Nansen 's  news  in  the  London  street,  Borisoff 
came  across  from  Christiana  to  talk  things  over.  All 
this  time  that  I  had  been  looking  at  the  face  he  had  been 
building  a  ship  as  good,  he  said,  as  the  Fram.  No  man 
would  dare  say  more.  He  had  made  agreements  with 
a  crew  and  company  of  picked  men,  some  of  them  his 
old  whaling  people.  He  had  news  that  the  Finlander 


492  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

we  'd  sent  the  year  before  to  Siberia,  after  Olenek  dogs, 
would  be  waiting  with  the  pack  up  there  on  that  bleak 
shore,  between  Chelyuskin  and  the  Kara  Sea— 'waiting 
for  you  and  me,'  said  Borisoff."  The  sick  man's  eyes 
were  shining.  "Borisoff  was  a  tremendous  fellow!  I 
never  knew  but  one  person  who  did  n't  believe  in 
Borisoff.  You  could  n't  expect  a  girl—  '  he  broke  off. 
"But  the  great  bond  between  him  and  me  was  that  we 
both  had  that  passion  for  the  North,  that  is  like  nothing 
else  on  earth  in  the  way  of  land  love.  Talk  of  the 
South !  A  man  loves  the  South  as  he  loves  a  soft  bed  and 
the  warm  corner  by  the  fire.  But  he  loves  the  North  as 
he  loves  his  prey. ' '  He  brought  one  hand  away  from  his 
beard  and  he  fastened  it  afresh  in  the  knotted  oilskin  at 
his  side,  with  an  air  of  one  about  to  rise  up  and  continue 
his  journey.  "Well,  one  day  I  said  to  Borisoff,  'Of 
course  we  can 't  do  the  damned  thing  if  Nansen  could  n  't 
—so  come  along,  and  let  's  try ! ' 

"We  sailed  from  Tromso  that  July. 

"But  we  did  n't  call  ourselves  arctic  explorers,  and 
we  never  once  said  Pole— not  even  after  we  reached  the 
edge  of  the  ice-pack,  north  of  Sannikof  Island.  It 
was  n't  till  we  got  into  north  latitude  78°  that  we  called 
a  council  of  war.  By  that  time  we  knew  our  men  and 
they  knew  us.  We  were  sure  of  six,  but  we  put  it  to  the 
other  four  as  well.  We  engaged  to  extricate  the  ship 
from  the  floe  and  send  her  home,  if  any  man  of  them 
wanted  to  turn  back.  What  were  Borisoff  and  I  going 
to  do  ?  one  of  the  doubtful  four  asked.  Well,  we  had  our 
famous  steel  launch,  and  we  had  sledges,  dogs,  kyacks. 
provisions,  and— we  had— an  idea  we  'd  like  to  see  what 
it  was  like— farther  on.  I  've  always  believed  our  not 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  493 

saying  anything  about '  a  dash, '  or  so  much  as  naming  the 
great  goal,  gave  Borisoff's  words  their  most  compelling 
eloquence.  If  we  'd  said  then  that  we  wanted  to  try  for 
the  Pole,  some  one  would  have  felt  himself  obliged  to 
object  and  talk  prudence.  As  it  was,  we  twelve  sat  there 
as  one  man  in  the  little  saloon  of  the  Narwhal,  with  the 
loose  ice  grinding  against  the  ship's  sides.  And  no  one 
said,  but  every  one  was  thinking,  '  We  '11  find  the  Pole. ' 
Borisoff  was  a  born  leader.  Not  a  soul  on  the  ship  but 
believed  Borisoff  would  do  anything  he  set  out  to  do. 
They  all  knew  by  now  how  extraordinarily  well  equipped 
we  were.  Borisoff  showed  again  and  again  how  we 
should  profit  by  the  failure  of  our  forerunners.  Well, 
that  was  in  September.  We  were  frozen  in,  and  we 
drifted  with  the  ice  all  that  winter  and  following  sum 
mer—drifted  in  the  dark,  with  bears  prowling  round  the 
ice-shrouded  ship— drifted  in  the  midnight  sun  with 
guillemots  and  fulmars  circling  about  our  rigging." 

He  sat  there  some  seconds  staring  through  the  peat 
wall,  never  seeing  the  open  watch,  forgetting  the  irrev 
ocable  hour.  As  though  she,  too,  shared  in  some  chill 
vision,  the  dog  shivered. 

To  bring  the  master  back,  "Ky  is  cold,"  said  Hilde- 
garde,  and  would  have  thrown  over  her  a  trailing  end  of 
blanket. 

"No,  no,  she  's  not  cold  here/'  the  sick  man  answered, 
but  in  a  voice  so  faint  and  far  Hildegarde  wondered  if 
he  would  ever  speak  again. 

To  mask  her  creeping  fear  and  bridge  the  silence, 
"Why  does  she  shiver,  if  she  's  not  cold?" 

His  absent  eyes  came  slowly  back  to  where  the  dog 
was  uneasily  dozing.  "Thinks  we  're  crossing  the  ice- 


494  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

moraines,  thinks  she  can't  go  on,  then  remembers  the 
whip.  The  whip  that  flies  out  when  you  least  expect  it, 
eh,  Ky?— and  bites  the  hair  off  clean."  He  bent  for 
ward,  and  gently  laid  his  distorted  hands  on  the  scarred 
and  trembling  hide.  The  dog  was  quiet  again. 

"That  first  winter,"  he  went  on,  "one  of  our  men  was 
killed  by  a  bear,  and  one  died  from  a  natural  cause.  He 
would  have  died  at  home.  Early  in  the  summer  came 
the  day  when  the  ice  gripped  us.  Our  tough  ship  might 
have  been  an  egg-shell.  But  we  were  ready." 

"You  had  to  abandon  her?" 

He  gave  a  short  nod.  "Sledges  out  on  the  ice  away 
from  the  pressure  area,  packed,  and  kyack-loaded.  We 
had  kept  the  dogs  in  condition  by  short  journeys,  and 
we  knew  they  were  as  splendid  animals  for  work  as  they 
were  terrible  for  fighting.  We  could  n't  prevent  them 
from  tearing  each  other  to  pieces,  but  between  whiles 
they  carried  us  on.  Eh,  Ky?  You  carried  us  on,  for 
you  carried  our  means  of  life.  Or  maybe  we  carried  you, 
with  our  whips  and  clubs  and  curses.  It  's  horrible  to 
look  back,  that  's  why  I  do  it,  to  save  Ky  any  more—" 
His  eyes  implored  the  dumb  creature 's  pardon.  ' '  Those 
days  and  months  of  forcing  the  dwindled  pack  over  the 
pressure  ridges!— and  when  the  patient  beasts  stopped 
from  sheer  exhaustion,  shouting  at  them  till  our  own 
voices  tore  our  nerves  and  burst  our  very  ear-drums, 
hardening  our  hearts,  beating  the  splendid  animals,  till 
they  lay  down  one  by  one  on  those  desolate  ice-plains 
and  died.  Well,  well,  well,"— he  made  sure  of  the  bun 
dle  again,— "the  dogs  had  the  best  of  it.  We  blood- 
marked  many  a  mile  of  the  polar  ice,  we  stumbled 
from  floe  to  floe,  we  stormed  the  pressure  ridges,  and 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  495 

when  the  teams  had  dwindled  and  the  ice  opened  in  long 
reaches,  we  took  the  remaining  dogs  into  our  canvas 
boats  and  along  the  water  lanes  we  sailed  and  sailed. ' ' 

' '  To  the  Pole  ?    You  did  find  the—  " 

"Lord!"  he  interrupted,  "finding  the  Pole  is  n't  a 
patch  on  hunting  for  it!  That  's  what  the  men  of  the 
future  will  never  know.  You  can  read  the  kind  of  thing 
we  went  through  in  any  arctic  book.  You  can  read  it  all, 
and  then  know  nothing  about  it.  We  did  impossible 
things— things  any  man  will  say  he  can't  do.  And  then 
he  does  them  because  he  must,  and  because  human  en 
durance  is  the  one  miracle  left  in  the  world. ' ' 

An  instant  he  stopped  for  breath.  "Good  men,  all 
our  fellows.  But  their  bones  are  up  yonder.  Good  dogs, 
too.  Ky  's  the  one  that  's  left." 

There  was  a  long  silence  in  the  dim  little  room. 

' '  But  you  reached  the  Pole,  Borisoff  and  you ! ' ' 

Slowly  he  shook  his  wild  head.  "Not  Borisoff." 
There  was  silence  for  a  while. 

"It  must  have  been  very  horrible  for  you  when  he — " 

"Yes,"  said  the  sick  man,  and  Hildegarde  saw  the 
mouth  set  harder  yet  under  the  tawny  cloud.  ' '  The  day 
he  died  we  came  upon  a  great  piece  of  timber  frozen 
aslant  in  the  ice.  Borisoff  had  been  queer,  wandering 
all  those  last  days.  But  that  great  shaft  that  had  come 
from  some  land  where  the  trees  grow  glorious  and  tall, 
the  sight  of  it  excited  him  so  that  it  cleared  his  head. 
He  said  it  was  Siberian  spruce,  and  had  come  from  his 
own  forests  of  the  Yenisei.  And  he  talked  about  the 
currents  that  had  carried  it  so  far— talked  rationally. 
We  found  initials  carved  on  one  end:  *F.  N.— H.'  If 
ever  there  had  been  more  the  record  was  frayed  out  of 


496  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

existence  by  the  timber  catapulting  against  the  ice.  '  I  '11 
rest  here/  Borisoff  had  said,  and"— a  long  time  seemed 
to  go  by— "I  Ve  no  doubt  he  rests  well.  Splendid  fel 
low,  Borisoff. 

' '  The  next  day  I  cut  his  name  on  the  great  log,  and  I 
went  on  alone." 

"YouandKy!" 

He  nodded.  "Ky  and  the  dogs  that  were  left,  fight 
ing  our  way  over  the  ice-moraines  in  a  hard,  fierce  light, 
that  seemed  to  come  from  every  point  of  the  compass  at 
once.  I  remember  a  curious  optical  delusion  overtook 
me.  I  lost  all  faculty  of  seeing  the  snow-covered  ice  I 
walked  on.  I  could  feel  it,  of  course,  at  every  step.  I 
could  see  my  snow-shoes  sharp  as  if  they  'd  been  sil 
houettes  poised  in  air.  But  the  terrible  white  light  that 
bathed  the  universe  seemed  to  be  flooding  up  from  under 
my  feet  as  well  as  beating  on  my  head.  Eound  that 
white  bossed  shield  of  the  frozen  sea  the  sun  moved  in 
his  shrunken  circle,  with  no  uprising  and  no  setting, 
abhorring  shadow.  Like  that,  day  and  night,  night  and 
day." 

"For  how  long?" 

' '  For  a  thousand  years.  A  dog  killed  to  feed  the  rest, 
and  still  on,  'for  miles  on  miles  on  miles  of  desolation- 
leagues  on  leagues  on  leagues,  without  a  change.'  In  a 
world  as  dead  and  white  as  leprosy."  He  closed  his 
eyes,  as  if  the  midnight  glare  still  dazzled  him. 

In  her  sleep  again  the  dog  had  been  moving  and 
moaning. 

"Ky  is  in  pain,"  said  the  girl,  very  softly,  hardly 
daring  to  whisper. 

The  sick  man  opened  his  eyes  and  faintly  shook  his 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  497 

head.  "Only  dreaming.  I  do  the  same  myself.  Wake 
in  the  dark,  and  think  the  pressure  has  sent  the  ice  tow 
ering  above  us.  And  while  we  try  to  get  across  the 
broken  blocks,  suddenly  they  begin  to  grind  and  growl 
and  to  writhe  and  thunder,  as  if  moved  to  hatred  of  us. 
Ky  lost  a  yoke-fellow  in  such  a  place,  crushed  between 
the  shrieking  boulders.  Quiet,  Ky !  The  exploring  's 
all  done.  At  least '  '—he  looked  up— ' '  I  'd  like  to  think— ' ' 

"You  may/' 

' '  Thank  you, ' '  said  the  sick  man. 

"Yes,  Ky,"  Hildegarde  spoke  with  a  little  break  in 
her  voice.  "The  exploring  's  all  done."  As  if  the  dog 
had  heard  and  comprehended,  and  so  been  delivered  from 
evil  dreams,  she  got  up,  came  shakily  down  from  the  bed, 
and  stood  for  a  moment  at  the  door,  looking  out. 

"What  's  ahead  of  us,  Ky?"  he  asked,  dreamily. 
"An  ice  sky  or  a  water  sky?" 

"How  was  it  you  could  tell?" 

"Oh,  you  learn.  The  field-ice  reflection  is  the  bright 
est,  a  little  yellow ;  drift  ice,  purer  white ;  new  ice,  gray. 
And  where  there  's  open  water  the  'blink'  is  slatey, 
is  n't  it,  Ky?  Or  blue,  like  the  skies  of  California." 

"But  the  Pole?"  The  word  brought  a  startled  look 
into  his  face,  and  his  eyes  guarded  the  threshold  so 
fiercely  she  sunk  her  voice  to  meet  his  humor.  "What 
was  it  like?"  she  whispered. 

"Ky  knows,"  he  answered,  warily.     "Ky  got  there." 

With  a  supreme  humility,  or  was  it  a  high  indifference 
on  her  part,  the  great  explorer  crossed  the  threshold  and 
sat  outside  in  the  sun. 

"I  've  wondered  about  it  a  good  deal,  as  I  Ve  lain 
here,"  said  the  sick  man.  "It  almost  seems  as  if  nothing 


498  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

in  the  world-scheme  were  so  precious  as  suffering.  Men 
feel  that  when  they  recall  their  early  hardships.  Dimly 
they  see  that  nothing  they  Ve  found  later  was  of  such 
value  to  them.  Yes,  yes,  beside,  the  days  of  the  struggle 
the  days  of  the  harvest  are  dull.  And  it  's  this"— he 
crouched  over  the  oilskin,  and  dropped  his  voice— "this 
incentive  to  the  greatest  struggle  that  men  can  embark 
upon— this  is  the  Great  Legacy  I  shall  leave  behind!" 

"But  what,"  she  pointed  to  the  thing  he  was  hugging 
between  gaunt  arms,  "what  is  in  that?" 

"The  proofs,"  he  whispered,  and  started  when  the 
word  was  out.  It  seemed  to  Hildegarde  that  he  held  the 
weather-beaten  bundle  tighter  still,  and  still  he  put  off 
telling  what  she  wanted  most  to  know.  As  if  he  could  n  't 
bring  himself,  after  all,  to  yield  the  secret  up.  : '  Think, ' : 
he  whispered.  "We  could  set  the  world  ringing  with  it, 
Ky . '  Only  we  must  n 't, " 

"Yes,  yes,  but  you  must!"  Hildegarde  half  started 
to  her  feet. 

' '  No.    Not  after—    I  swore  an  oath,  you  see. ' ' 

"To-" 

That  motion  of  the  wild  head:  "The  One  up  yonder." 


CHAPTER  XXV 

[HAT  One  up  yonder?"    Hildegarde's  voice 
was  as  hushed  as  his  own. 
"Kyome." 
"Who  is  that?" 

1 '  The  god  of  the  unknown  North.    Had  n  't 
you  heard  that  in  all  the  old  lands,   from  Greece  to 
Mexico,  there  was  always  an  altar  to  the  unknown  god  ? ' ' 
She  nodded. 

"When  men  in  their  foolishness  threw  down  those 
temples,  the  old  gods  fled  to  the  farther  countries.  Last 
of  all  to  the  world's  waste  places."  He  held  up  one 
horrible  hand,  and  made  a  grotesque  motion  of  "Come 
nearer. ' ' 
She  obeyed. 

"The  greatest  of  these  gods  of  the  unknown— he  sat 
on  a  throne  of  ice  at  the  top  of  the  world.  The  others— 
they  had  found  no  rest  from  the  men  of  the  West.  Be 
hind  the  Great  Wall  of  China  we  hunted  them  out.  We 
forced  our  way  to  them  through  Japan  ports.  We  let 
the  garish  day  into  the  dim  temples  of  Korea,  and  the 
gold  terraces  of  holy  Lhasa  are  trod  by  alien  feet.  But 
the  uttermost  North  was  all  inviolate  till  I  came.  I 
made  the  kingdom  mine.  But  now"— he  lifted  the 
maimed  right  hand  like  one  taking  oath— "now  I  abdi 
cate.  I  will  destroy  my  title-deeds.  Fire !  a  little  fire !" 

499 


500  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

His  hands  fumbled  among  the  shavings  in  the  blanket, 
and  feverishly  he  caught  up  the  knife. 

"No,  no.  Let  me,"  she  said.  "I  '11  do  it  for  you. 
See,  I  can  split  the  kindling  straight  down."  She 
strained  to  make  good  the  boast.  ' '  Just  a  moment !  Oh, 
but  this  kind  of  wood  is  tough!  What  is  it?  Not  a 
piece  of  drift— so  flat  and  smooth  ? ' ' 

"Piece  of  a  broken  skee— my  snow-shoe."  While  she 
forced  the  sharp  blade  down,  he  was  calling  out,  "Ky! 
D'  you  hear  that  fellow  laughing  at  us?" 

The  dog  turned  obedient,  and  both  her  pointed  ears 
seemed  to  be  pricking  at  the  silence. 

"Whenever  I  begin  to  hope,  I  hear  that  walrus  guf 
faw."  Ky's  master  was  listening  with  all  his  shrinking 
soul,  and  his  eyes  looked  straight  through  the  wall,  but 
he  spoke  as  quietly  as  before.  Hildegarde  shivered  a 
little.  Death  itself  could  hardly  remove  him  further 
than  he  had  wandered  in  those  few  seconds.  "Oh,  come 
back!"  she  said  in  her  heart,  and  then  aloud,  "Tell  me, 
please  tell  me,  how  I  shall  manage  about  Ky?" 

"Ky?"    His  eyelids  fluttered  as  he  obeyed  the  call. 

"Yes,  how  am  I  to  make  her  follow  me?" 

"Give  her  more  of  your  pilot  bread." 

"Will  she  leave  you  at  the  last  for  that?" 

"She  won't  know  it  's  the  last,  and  she  is  hungry. 
Are  n't  you,  Ky?" 

Hildegarde  laid  down  the  knife  an  instant,  took  a 
fragment  from  her  pocket  and  held  it  out  to  the  dog. 

Very  doubtfully  Ky  came  nearer.  But  still  she 
could  n't  make  up  her  mind  to  trust  the  new  friend's 
hand.  So  Hildegarde  laid  the  coveted  morsel  down. 

When  Ky  had  cautiously  snapped  it  up,  she  hobbled 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  501 

to  the  bedside  and  turned  her  dim  eyes  to  the  old  familiar 
bundle. 

''Yes,  I  Ve  got  it  safe."  He  circled  it  with  an  arm, 
still  looking  down  at  the  dog. 

Would  he  ever  let  it  go  of  his  own  free  will?  What 
vain  notion  was  this  of  a  fire ! 

Now  he  was  muttering  absently,  as  he  smoothed  the 
oilskin:  "Our  harvest,  yours  and  mine.  Whatever  we 
went  through  in  the  sowing,  it  was  all  nothing,  was  n't 
it,  Ky?— just  nothing  to  bringing  the  harvest  home." 

"It  was  n't  possible  for  coming  to  be  worse  than 
going!" 

' '  Borisoff  would  have  said  no.  But  Borisoff  only  tried 
oneway.  We  know— Ky  and  I. "  In  the  pause  the  eye 
lids  closed  over  lusterless  eyes.  It  was  only  while  he 
spoke  of  the  journey  that  he  seemed  alive.  As  she 
looked  again  at  the  face,  as  blank  and  cold  as  a  grate 
without  a  fire,  horror  fell  upon  her  lest  he  should  die 
before  Cheviot  came  back. 

Hildegarde's  little  store  of  splinters  and  shavings  had 
grown  into  a  heap.  "If  I  make  kindling  for  the  fire,  I 
deserve  to  be  told— things— don't  I?  Besides,  then  I 
can  tell  her— the  face." 

' '  How  could  you  do  that  ? ' ' 

She  must  break  it  gradually.  "Would  n't  it  be  pos 
sible  for  me  to  find  her  out  and  tell  her  ? ' ' 

He  looked  at  Hildegarde  dreamily  an  instant.  "I 
wonder,"  he  said. 

"I  '11  do  it,  if  only  you  '11  go  on— go  on." 

He  made  a  faint  "no,"  with  the  wild  head,  smiling 
dimly.  "Any  one  may  have  a  nightmare.  No  one  has 
ever  told  a  nightmare,  so  it  did  n't  sound  absurd.  It  's 


502  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

a  thing  you  can't  pass  on,  fortunately.  You  can't  re 
cover  it  even  for  yourself.  Of  all  those  last  weeks,  only 
three  things  stand  out  clear :  one  was  the  day  I  saw  the 
first  fox  track  in  the  snow. ' ' 

"You  were  glad  of  that?" 

"Glad  of  the  first  sign  of  life?" 

"And  the  second  thing?" 

"The  day  when  I  looked  south  and  saw  the  sky  was 
yellow. ' ' 

"What  did  that  mean?" 

"Land.  All  the  rest  's  a  blur.  And  in  the  blur  two 
shadows— Ky  and  I,  on  the  homeward  journey— the 
journey  that  I  knew  even  then  would  n't  end  at  home. 
Ky  and  I.  All  our  companions  dead.  The  last  dog, 
even  our  infinitesimal  rations  of  pemmican,  gone. 
Everything  gone,  but  Ky  and  my  title-deeds." 

"I  don't  see  how  you  bore  it — how  you  kept  alive." 

"7  don't  know.  Later  we  fed  on  the  small  crustaceans 
in  the  ice-channels,  then  the  narwhal.  But  in  the  strain 
I  think  my  wits  went.  Mercifully  I  can't  recover  much 
in  that  blur  of  agony  till  the  moment  that  stands  out 
clear  as  conflagration  in  the  dark— that  moment  when 
I  set  our  course  by  the  shadow  my  staff  cast,  and  saw— 
He  dropped  his  hollow  jaw,  staring  at  some  horror  un 
speakable. 

"What  was  it  you—" 

"I  saw  that  while  we  were  stumbling  blindly  toward 
the  blessed  South— faster  still  the  ice  that  we  were  on 
was  drifting  north." 

"Carrying  you  back  to— 

"Back  to  the  Pole." 

Her  fingers  lost  their  hold  upon  the  knife. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  503 

He  did  n't  even  notice  that  she  was  no  longer  keeping 
her  part  of  the  compact.  "Talk  of  Sisyphus!  Talk  of 
torture !  Ky  and  I,  like  half -frozen  flies  crawling  over 
the  roof  of  the  world,  while  the  greater  forces  carried 
us  calmly  back  to  the  North !  It  remains  burnt  into  my 
memory  as  the  final  type  of  hopeless  human  striving. 
Each  day  I  would  read  the  message  of  the  shadow  on 
the  ice,  till  I  began  to  say  to  myself:  the  penalty  for 
having  reached  the  Pole  is  that  you  must  stay  there.  No 
use  to  struggle.  You  are  surrounded,  captured,  brought 
back.  The  spirit  of  the  violated  place  won 't  allow  a  man 
to  carry  his  victory  home.  It  was  then  I  understood." 
Palm  across  palm  he  laid  his  fumbling  hands,  but  his 
faint-moving  lips  brought  no  sound  forth. 
"You  prayed?" 

"Prayed?  Something  of  the  sort.  I  made  a  vow. 
By  the  unknown  god  I  swore  if  I  were  allowed  to  get 
back  alive  no  soul  should  ever  know— except  just  one 
among  all  the  living.  Strange  it  should  be  you ! ' ' 
"Of  course  you  were  thinking  of  little— of  - 
"Yes.  I  'd  tell  nobody,  I  swore,  but  a  girl.  I  meant 
a  girl  with  a  little  doll  face— a  girl  who  would  n't  under 
stand.  Our  national  phrase  for  any  sort  of  success  kept 
running  in  my  head.  I  still  felt  I  'd  like  her  to  know 
I  had  n't  failed  'to  get  there.'  Foolishness,  of  course. 
What  I  really  wanted  was  that  she  should  have  a  share 
in  that  vision  no  man's  eyes  but  mine  had  seen.  I 
meant  to  show  her  these. ' ' 

It  was  terrible  to  see  his  hands  trying  to  undo  the 
treasure.  But  while  again  she  hacked  at  the  unyielding 
wood,  Hildegarde  followed  fascinated  each  grotesque 
move  the  sick  man  made.  At  last  the  tight-drawn  knots 


504  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

had  yielded.  Between  the  four  corners  of  the  ancient 
oilskin,  creased  and  twisted  and  stained,  the  harvest  of 
John  Galbraith  's  life  lay  open  in  the  hollow  between 
his  knees.  Hildegarde  stood  up  with  knife  caught  in  a 
cleft  of  the  skee,  staring.  He  turned  over  the  little  hoard 
of  discolored  papers  that  lay  on  a  flat  chart-box,  a 
theodolite,  a  pocket  sextant,  and  a  record  cylinder. 

"Notes,  sketches,  tables  of  temperature  and  magnetic 
variation,  casual  phenomena.  Oh,  I  found  out  strange 
secrets !  The  whole  story  's  here.  I  'd  sooner  have  left 
my  bones  up  yonder  than  not  bring  her  back  the  proofs. ' ' 
He  opened  out  the  chart  and  hung  over  the  grimy,  tat 
tered  sheet  as  though  it  were  some  work  of  art  tri 
umphant—a  perfection  of  beauty  unimagined  in  the 
world  before.  As  he  sat  there  hugging  the  shabby  heap 
between  his  knees,  you  would  have  thought  that  stained 
and  sea-soaked  store  must  be  splendid  with  color,  or 
resonant  with  the  organ  music  of  the  deep  and  of  great 
winds  harping  in  the  waste— fit  record  of  a  pilgrimage 
no  soul  had  made  before. 

"In  my  heart,"  he  said,  "I  hoped,  when  I  took  her 
these,  she  might,  at  last,  realize — 

A  torn  and  dirty  book,  with  corners  worn  round  and 
curling,  and  a  look  about  its  tough,  discolored  pages  as 
though  it  had  come  down  a  thousand  years.  "My 
diary."  He  turned  a  page.  "She  could  n't  have  read 
it,  would  n't  want  so  much  as  to  touch  it.  Still,  it  was 
for  her  that  even  at  the  last  I  carried  it  rather  than 
food." 

Opening  the  other  side  of  the  shallow  chart-box  that 
was  fitted  with  grooves  in  which  sheets  of  stout  drawing- 
paper  were  slipped  and  firmly  held  in  place,  he  drew 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  505 

what  that  first  glance  seemed  to  reveal  as  a  meaningless 
smudge  of  violent  color.  "There  it  is!"  and  no  sooner 
had  he  said  the  words,  than  nervously  he  was  sheltering 
the  thing  behind  one  knee.  ''You  are  sure  that  old  fel 
low  is  n't  hanging  about?" 

She  glanced  out.    "Quite  sure." 

Cautiously  he  brought  the  paper  up  from  its  moment 's 
hiding,  but  his  low  voice  dropped  to  a  deeper  register, 
"That  's  what  it  's  like!" 

From  the  hoarse  triumph  in  the  tone  she  knew  that 
however  clear  before  his  actual  eyes  had  been  once  this 
picture  in  his  hand,  they  saw  it  now  no  more. 

"That  's  what  Borisoff  and  the  rest  died  to  have  a 
glimpse  of.  This  is  what  I  found,  instead  of  the  palseo- 
crystic  sea.  Here  is  where  the  ice-hills  rise.  There  'd 
been  a  storm.  The  low  cloud-masses— they  were  incredi 
ble!  Like  that!  And  the  zenith  clear,  except  for  the 
banners  of  light." 

Plain  he  had  no  guess  that  the  colored  crayon  was 
both  marred  and  bettered;  that  the  picture  he  had  set 
down,  with  some  fair  skill,  had  been  less  moving,  less 
poetic,  even  less  true  than  this,  that  chance  had  wrought 
with  a  blind  but  faithful  artistry.  For  as  Hildegarde 
stared  at  the  prismatic  haze,  a  kind  of  wild  meaning 
dawned  there  upon  the  paper.  Yes,  surely,  chance  had 
craftier  hands  than  any  but  the  greatest  among  the  sons 
of  men.  For  the  picture  brought  that  almost  religious 
conviction  of  the  truth  that  great  art  gives.  Just  so, 
and  no  otherwise,  must  this  thing  have  been.  The  dome 
of  the  sky  up  yonder  was  an  inverted  bowl  of  brass. 
And  in  the  heavenward  hollow  of  it  a  giant  brood  of 
serpents  flamed  and  writhed  above  a  wild  white  waste, 


506  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

warmed  here  with  violet,  cooled  there  with  silver  and 
pearl. 

"And  that,"  she  said,  only  to  have  assurance  of  his 
voice  again,  "that  's  what  the  world  is  like  up  there?" 

"Do  you  think  men  go  so  far,  and  walk  through  hell, 
to  bring  home  a  lie?" 

Looking  no  longer  at  the  orgy  of  color  on  the  paper, 
but  at  the  reflection  of  the  actual  scene  in  the  dying 
face,  "It  was  like  the  Day  of  Judgment,"  said  the  girl. 

"You  can  see  that!"  The  craftsman's  pleasure  in  his 
handiwork  brought  out  a  gleam,  and  then,  with  a  sudden 
passion,  he  tore  the  paper  across  and  across,  while  Hilde- 
garde  cried  out: 

"Ah,  don't!  Let  me  take  it  to— her!" 

"Take  it  to  the  fire!— and  leave  the  great  legacy  un 
encumbered.  Fire,  fire!"  He  was  gathering  up  the 
splinters  and  shavings  that  he  had  whittled  from  the 
skee  in  the  hours  before  Hildegarde  's  coming.  * '  Here ! 
Here!" 

A  sense  of  impotency  shackled  her  spirit  as  well  as 
lamed  her  tongue.  Blindly  she  took  the  fragments  over 
to  the  embrasure  of  some  blackened  stones,  just  inside 
and  to  windward  of  the  threshold. 

"No  one  is  about?" 

"No  one." 

"This  is  to  start  it,  then."  He  held  out  something. 
"This  will  catch  easiest." 

"I  have  some  thin  paper  here."  She  twisted  a  wisp 
of  her  own  map  of  the  North,  with  a  vague  instinct  of 
putting  off  an  evil  hour. 

'But  the  sick  man  followed  with  eager  eyes  the  laying 
of  every  crosswise  stick,  his  gaunt  frame  huddled  over 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  507 

his  treasure  while  he  watched  the  making  of  the  sacri 
ficial  fire  that  should  devour  it.  If  his  eyes  left  Hilde- 
garde's  hands  a  moment,  it  was  only  that  they  might 
guard  the  door  against  surprise. 

Once  again,  "Look  out,"  he  said,  "and  see—" 

' '  There  's  no  one.  But  would  n  't  you  like  somebody 
to  come  in?  Some  face  out  of  the  past— 

' '  To  come  now ! ' ' 

"Some  one  who  could  bring  you  news  of— that  girl 
you-" 

"Remember  wood  's  worth  more  than  gold  up  here! 
Keep  a  little  back." 

"Keep  some  back?" 

"Paper  like  this  burns  slow.  As  you  say  some  one 
might  interrupt—"  No  hospitality  in  the  look  he  sent 
to  the  door.  "Before  you  light  it,  have  everything  over 
there,  ready  to  feed  the  fire."  His  thin  arms  gathered 
up  the  store.  Ky  growled  uneasily  as  Hildegarde  drew 
near,  the  girl  wondering  what  was  best  for  Galbraith's 
peace,  what  was  of  any  avail. 

He  made  a  motion  to  give  her  all  he  held,  but  what 
he  actually  handed  over  was  the  torn  crayon,  and  even 
in  the  act  of  giving  up  that  he  set  one  fragment  against 
another,  looking  his  last. 

"Oh,  keep  it— let  me  keep  it— for  her.  Could  you 
bear  to  hear—' 

But  that  mysterious  arctic  current,  about  which  the 
greatest  geographers  are  not  agreed,  it  had  carried  him 
back  again  to  the  Pole !  With  vacant  eyes  on  the  col 
ored  paper,  "We  left  him  a  feather  for  his  ice-cap, 
didn't  we,  Ky?" 

"A  feather." 


508  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"  Or  a  ribbon.    Did  n  't  you  see  ?  " 


"This.  You  did  n't  notice  we  planted  the  stars  and 
stripes  there?" 

"Oh-h.  You  see  I  thought  you  said  no  one  was  ever 
to  know— 

"  —  and  I  carved  a  B.  on  the  flagstaff.  It  was  Boris- 
off's  snow-shoe  staff.  But  the  B.—  it  did  n't  stand  for 
Borisoff." 

"No?" 

"No.  The  bamboo  stood  up  there  so  light  and  slen 
der—  Again  the  look  that  only  one  remembrance  could 
bring  into  his  eyes. 

"It  must  have  seemed  like  Bella  upholding  our  coun 
try's  flag." 

His  whole  face  warmed  into  smiling.  The  death 
shadows  fled  for  that  moment  of  his  saying,  "Had  I 
told  you  her  name?  Yes,  I  brought  the  record  cylinder 
away,  and  left  there  only  something  that  would  perish.  '  ' 

'  '  You  make  a  fetish  of  that  oath  you  swore  !  '  ' 

"It  is  n't  because  of  the  oath.  Why  should  I  take  an 
empty  fame  out  of  the  world  with  me  ?  Should  I  rest  the 
better?" 

"You  think  only  of  yourself.  But  there  's  the  gain  to 
science.  What  right  have  you  to  deprive  the  world  of 
that?" 

He  smiled.  "You  speak  like  a  green  girl,  or  like  a 
newspaper.  Forgive  me  !  But  you  don  't  realize.  The 
gain  to  science  is  the  by-product.  The  true  gain  is  to 
the  human  soul.  You  don  't  believe  me  ?  Read  the  most 
inspiring  books  ever  written  about  the  arctic." 

"Perhaps  I  have.    Who  wrote  them?" 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  509 

"Franklin,  Greely,  and  De  Long— the  three  who 
failed.  Here  's  to  them!"  He  lifted  up  the  cup, 
emptied  it,  and  dropped  it  with  a  ringing  of  rusty  tin, 
an  eye  cleared  and  preternaturally  bright.  "In  the  past 
it  was  all  different,  you  know.  Enough  and  to  spare  in 
the  physical  world  to  be  conquered.  But  the  things  to 
be  conquered  in  the  future,  do  you  know  what  they 
are?" 

Voiceless  she  shook  her  head. 

"Moral  weakness  and  physical  self-indulgence.  In 
America  we  are  all  so  comfortable  we  are  all  like  to  be 
damned ! ' ' 

She  could  have  wept  aloud  to  hear  the  half -whimsical, 
half-delirious  tone  of  the  wreck  upon  the  camp-bed 
deprecating  comfort. 

"If  Borisoff  had  lived— I  don't  know.  But  Borisoff 
is  sleeping  in  the  lee  of  that  great  shaft  of  Siberian  pine, 
and  I— if  I  know  anything  in  the  hereafter,  I  shall  be 
glad  that  I  left  the  hope  behind  me  for  other  men. ' ' 

"Left  it  for  some  new  Norse  Viking  maybe,  or  some 
sea-faring  Briton.  And  America  will  never  know— 

"  'Sh.  I  'm  not  sure  whether  I  'm  more  sorry  that 
America  should  n't  know  she  was  first  at  the  goal,  or 
whether  I  'm  not  more  proud  that  it  should  be  an  Ameri 
can  who  wins  the  race  and  refrains  from  making  the 
world  resound  with  it.  That  it  should  be  an  American, 
after  all,  to  do  just  that.  One,  too,"— he  smiled  with  a 
curious  sweetness,— "one  as  guilty  of  boasting  as  his 
brothers  are.  So  you  see  I  keep  some  spark  of  vanity  to 
light  me— out.  Here!"  He  gathered  the  hoard  in  his 
arms  an  instant,  and  held  it  half-hidden  under  his 
beard. 


510  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

But  it  seemed  as  hard  for  him  to  loose  his  arms  from 
about  his  treasure  as  for  a  mother  to  part  from  her  child. 

Hildegarde  made  a  tender,  half-unconscious  motion  of 
protecting  both  the  broken  man  and  the  toys  his  dying 
hands  still  clung  to.  But  he,  not  comprehending,  said 
faintly :  ' '  I  Ve  carried  this  little  bundle  of  papers  across 
the  crown  of  the  world  to — to  give  it  to  a  strange  woman 
at  last!" 

"No,  no."  She  fell  on  her  knees  by  the  bed.  "I  am 
not  strange  !  I  am  Hildegarde. ' ' 

His  blazing  eyes  looked  over  her  bowed  head  at  the 
little  heap  among  the  blackened  stones.  "Here!"  he 
whispered. 

"What  'sthis?" 

' '  A  wind-match.    Careful !  there  's  only  one  more. ' ' 

She  rose  unsteadily,  with  a  sense  of  the  utter  useless- 
ness  of  any  help  now  for  this  man  who  had  been  Jack 
Galbraith.  But  as  she  struck  the  match,  and  the  fire 
caught  among  the  sticks,  once  more  the  life  leaped  up  in 
the  man.  He  sat  erect,  exultant,  horrible  to  look  upon, 
tearing  the  leaves  of  a  book,  holding  them  up  in  sheaves, 
and  crying  out :  ' '  Here,  take  the  rest !  I  keep  my  word. 
I  give  the  Kingdom  back  to  the  oldest  of  the  gods ! ' ' 
And  with  that  he  fell  together  and  lay  with  eyes  hidden, 
breathing  hoarsely. 

When  she  saw  that  the  last  pages,  not  even  smolder 
ing  any  more,  lay  charred  among  the  stones,  she  turned 
again  to  the  bedside.  Was  he  dead?  A  long  time  she 
stood  there.  What  sound  was  that  above  the  surf? 
Again  the  long  shrilling  note.  She  went  to  the  door. 
Again !  Of  course ;  the  steam  whistle  of  the  Beluga,  call 
ing  the  travelers  back.  And  this  other  traveler,  had  he 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  511 

heard  a  call  ?  Was  he,  too,  gone  home  ?  With  trembling 
knees  she  made  her  way  back  to  the  low  bed.  Again  the 
strident  sound.  It  set  the  nerves  a-shake.  Painfully  the 
gaunt  figure  moved.  It  lifted  up  its  face.  It  sent  little- 
seeing  eyes  to  the  stony  altar.  They  seemed  to  search 
among  the  ashes. 

Again  the  wind  bore  over  the  water  that  harsh  sum 
mons  to  be  gone.  "Everything  is  burned,"  said  the 
girl,  and  with  a  little  strangled  cry  of  "Bella!  Bella!" 
Hildegarde  buried  her  face  in  her  hands,  sobbing :  ' '  Oh, 
I  think  I  was  mad  to  help  you.  I  'm  sorry.  I  'm  sorry. " 

"I  'mglad." 

She  dropped  her  hands. 

"Glad  .  .  .  have  n't  spoiled  .  .  .  finest  game  in  the 
world  .  .  .  the  men  who  come  after.  Don't  know— what 
they  '11  do— when  they  Ve  found  it— but— hunting  the 
Pole— will  last  them  .  .  .  good  while  yet.  Ky— won't 
tell!" 

Again  the  Beluga's  piercing  call. 

It  carried  Hildegarde  to  the  door.  Where  was  any 
counsel?  Where  was  Cheviot?  Ah,  yes!  From  the 
heights  behind  the  hut,  he  must  have  made  the  signal 
agreed  on  before  leaving  the  Beluga.  Hildegarde  could 
see  the  small  boat  putting  off  now  from  the  whaler. 
What  was  she  to  do?  If,  after  Cheviot's  promise,  there 
were  delay,  whc  could  doubt  the  choleric  captain  would 
not  scruple  to  leave  his  undesired  passengers  behind.  Or 
if  there  were  only  threat  of  that— her  father's  bewilder 
ment  and  misery.  What  to  do !  As  she  turned  her  eyes 
away  from  the  shining  world  without  the  door,  her  daz 
zled  vision  found  only  shadows  in  the  hut.  She  had 
dreamed  it  all !  No ;  that  voice  again :  "  —Still  heels  four 


512  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

degrees  to  starboard  !    One  point  1    No ;  only  a  motion  of 
the  floe  in  azimuth.    I  tell  you  we  're  locked  fast. ' ' 

''Please  listen.  I  'm  Bella's  friend.  I— oh,  come  back 
a  moment." 

"Tell  Borisoff— can't  hear  with  this  infernal  shrieking 
of  the  boulders.  By  the  Lord!"— he  raised  himself  on 
an  elbow— "ten  yards  of  this  living,  moving  ice  would 
hold  Goliath  back.  And  it  's  sixty  miles  to  the  sea ! " 

She  turned  her  wet  face  to  the  door  again.  The  toss 
ing  boat  out  yonder  seemed  to  go  down  before  her  eyes. 

"Don't  let  anyone  in!" 

"No,  no. ' '  There  it  was  again,  like  a  toy  boat  dancing 
wildly  before  destruction. 

"What  I  mind  most,"  the  faint  voice  whispered,  "is 
not  holding  out  till— I  got  across  to  Alaska.  All  those 
months— all  that  sacrifice— all  that  suffering— and  fail 
in  such  a  little  thing!" 

"Why,"  interrupted  the  girl,  "why  did  you  want  to 
get  to  Alaska?" 

"Why?  I— I  don't  seem  to  remember.  There  was  a 
reason.  But  it  's  too  far. ' ' 

"You  don't  mean—" 

"I  shall  never  get  there  now.  Do  you  hear  the  music, 
Ky?" 

"The  music?" 

"Screaming  of  the  ptarmigan.  Music  to  us,  was  n't 
it?"  In  a  changed  voice,  rational,  but  weak:  "I  can't 
see  you,  Ky . ' ' 

1 '  She  's  here,  with  me,  at  the  door. ' ' 

"Then  she  's  dim  as  she  used  to  be  when  she  plodded 
on  in  front,  wrapped  in  her  cloud  of  frost-smoke. 

"Please  try  to  listen.  I— see  the  sailors  bringing  the 
little  boat  through  the  surf. ' ' 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  513 

' l  That  's  easy.    Let  'em  try  the  ice ! ' ' 
1 1  They  're  coming  for  me. ' ' 

"You-you?" 

"You  don't  remember." 

"Yes,  I  do." 

"lam-" 

"Ky's  friend.  Thank  you."  Feebly  he  put  out  his 
hand.  But  he  would  have  drawn  it  back,  if  hers  had  not 
closed  trembling  over  it. 

' '  Oh,  Jack !  Jack ! "  she  cried  to  herself,  conscious  of  an 
anguished. impulse  to  hide  the  marred  hands  in  her  breast 
to  see  if  pity  might  not  heal  them ! 

"I  think  whatever  comes  of  it,"  she  said  brokenly,  "I 
must  n't  go." 

The  glazed  eyes  looked  at  her  in  faint  wonder. 

"Because  I  am  Hildegarde." 

" That  was  n't  her  name. " 

"No,  no.    I  am  Hildegarde  Mar." 

"A  nice  name." 

"But  you  've  heard  it  before." 

"Hildegarde—?"  The  faintest  motion  of  the  wild 
head  making  "No." 

"Yes,  yes."  She  was  on  her  knees  by  the  bed.  "My 
father  was  your  friend.  My  father  is  Nathaniel  Mar. ' ' 

He  said  nothing  for  a  moment.  She  thought  he  was 
trying  to  coordinate  the  memories  her  words  recalled. 
But  when  he  spoke  it  was  to  say,  "No  one  must  know  but 
Bella— only  Bella  in  all  the  world." 

"Only  Bella,"  said  the  girl,  and  rose  upright.  But 
through  her  tears  she  saw  that  his  lips  still  moved. 

"Will  you-  "  he  whispered.  She  bent  down  again  to 
catch  the  words.  "Will  you  stand  at  the  door— till  the 
boat  is  beached  1 ' ' 


33 


514  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

Hoping,  with  a  catch  at  the  heart,  that  old  association 
dimly  stirred  by  the  name  Mar  had  brought  him  some 
warmth  of  her  presence  in  this  chill  hour,  she  tried  to 
find  a  voice  to  ask  why  he  wanted  her  to  wait  those  few 
poor  minutes  at  the  door.  But  she  had  no  need  to  put 
the  question.  His  eyes  made  answer,  trying  to  follow 
Ky,  as  the  dog  left  the  threshold  and  went  with  her 
slow,  halting  gait,  aimless,  half  across  the  little  strip  of 
tundra  to  the  sea. 

"Don't  say— anything  to  me.  And  don't"— the  wild 
face  twitched  with  pain— "  do  n't  look  at  me.  Just— 
stand  there,  with  Ky— till  the  boat  's  ready.  And  when 
you  go— don't  speak."  Again  the  dimming  eyes  sought, 
on  the  tundra  for  that  vague  shadow  that  was  his  fel 
low-explorer  and  his  friend.  "I  shall  watch  you,  Ky— 
till  the  whaler— takes  you— South." 

As  Hildegarde,  bending  lower,  tried  to  form  speech 
with  her  quivering  lips,  ' '  No, ' '  he  whispered.  ' '  You  've 
done— all— you— can.  All,  but  this  last  thing.  I  'd  like 
—to  see  her  as  long  as  ever— But  don't  speak,  and— 
don't — look — back." 

His  eyes  went  past  the  girl,  went  straining  after  the 
dog,  as  though  Ky  were  in  truth  as  dim  to-day  as  on 
that  gray  morning  when  he  saw  her  first,  standing  in 
front  of  the  pack,  wrapped  in  mist,  nose  to  the  north, 
waiting  for  him  "up  yonder"  by  the  Kara  shore. 

Out  there,  on  the  tundra  edge  again,  the  great  ex 
plorer,  Ky,  stood  like  some  old  coastguard  reading  the 
signs  of  the  sea. 

Behind,  at  the  door  of  the  hut,  Hildegarde  Mar.  But 
though  the  girl,  too,  looked  straight  across  the  surf, 
toward  the  islands  named  for  those  in  the  Adriatic  after 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  515 

the  Argive  king,  what  she  saw  was  not  the  nearer  Dio- 
mede  and  not  the  little  boat  fighting  its  way  through  the 
surf;  not  even  her  lover  running  along  the  shore  and 
looking  among  the  high-piled  rocks ;  not  John  Galbraith, 
dying  behind  her  there  in  the  shadow.  Clearer  than  if 
she  'd  held  it  in  her  hand,  she  saw  the  colored  crayon 
sketch  that  lay  charred  among  the  ashes.  So  it  was  like 
that!— the  terrible,  beautiful  place  that  would  still  go 
luring  men  with  its  lying  legend  on  all  the  maps,  crying 
out  in  every  tongue  in  Europe — 

UNEXPLORED    REGION  ! 
COME  AND  FIND  ME ! 


CHAPTER  XXYI 

|T  last!  After  fruitless,  heart-sickening 
search  among  the  boulders,  Cheviot  had 
caught  sight  of  Hildegarde  breasting  easily 
the  risen  wind,  stepping  lightly  and  with 
out  the  least  inconvenience  down  from  the 
tundra  to  the  beach.  Over  the  rocks  he  came  running, 
making  signals  for  haste.  Red,  too,  a  long  way  behind, 
went  racing  along  the  shore,  back  and  forth,  barely  out 
of  the  spray;  running  seaward  when  the  breakers  re 
treated,  fleeing  from  them  on  their  return,  howling  at 
the  sailors  as  they  bent  over  their  oars,  hardly  fifty 
yards  from  the  foam-line. 

Hildegarde  made  her  way  blindly,  stumbling  among 
stones,  scattering  bits  of  pilot  bread  in  her  wake,  and 
casting  backward  looks. 

1 1  Hurry !  Hurry ! ' '  Cheviot  was  shouting. 

"She  's  so  lame!"  Hildegarde  could  n't  hear  his 
next  words,  but  she  caught  the  quick  gesture  of  one  who 
reproachfully  reminds  himself.  And  he  was  flying  for 
ward  to  her  aid. 

"I  'm  all  right— but  the  dog—" 

Without  slackening  pace,  a  hand  at  either  side  of  his 
mouth,  he  called:  "They  can't  hold  the  boat  in  that 
surf." 

"Ky-the  dog-" 

"Red   's  all  right.     He   's  there."     Louis  was  near 

516 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  517 

enough  now  for  her  to  see  the  heat  of  -the  race  in  his  face 
as  he  called  out:  "The  captain  will  be  furious—"  The 
rest  was  caught  away  by  the  wind,  till  quite  near :  "I  11 
Dull  you  along.  Here,  catch  hold  of  my  hand. ' ' 

"Oh,  Louis,  I  Ve  got  something  to  tell — " 
—ankle  giving  out  again?" 

"No,  not  that." 

He  turned  sharply  to  signal  the  sailors  that  the  lady 
would  be  there  in  time. 

"Louis!" 

' '  Don 't  waste  breath !    Come  on ! " 

"Something  's  happened.  It  's  about  Jack  Gal- 
braith." 

Had  he  heard  ?  What  was  he  going  to  do  ?  It  had  n  't 
occurred  to  her  so  much  as  to  wonder  before.  Did  he 
think  there  was  no  hurry  about  this  news  she  had  picked 
up  concerning  the  long-lost  traveler,  or  had  the  wind 
carried  the  name  away?  Or — " 

"I  must  tell  you  about  it,  Louis.    Wait  a  moment ! " 

"You  're  asking  the  tide  to  wait!"  And  far  from 
gently  his  own  momentum  was  carrying  her  on.  Was 
there  then  one  service  he  would  refuse  her?  Well — well 
—she  steeled  herself.  He  could  n't  refuse  to  take  the 
dog  in  any  case. 

"We— we  can't  go  so  fast." 

' '  Yes,  we  can.    We  Ve  got  to. ' ' 

"No.    I  must  wait  for— the  dog." 

A  flying  look  of  astonishment  sent  over  shoulder  shot 
from  her  to  Ky.  "That  dog?"  But  impatience  drove 
even  wonderment  out.  "Can 't  you  see  how  close— ' '  He 
flung  an  arm  toward  the  laboring  boat,  as  with  hot  face 
turned  seaward  to  the  wind  he  hurried  on. 

34 


518  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"If  the  dog  goes  back  he  '11  think  I  failed  him—" 
The  wind  and  the  surf  took  the  rest.  In  the  turmoil  of 
her  mind  the  first  thing  needful  to  assure  seemed  to  be 
Ky's  safe  conveyance  to  the  ship.  While  Louis,  without 
slackening  speed,  snatched  her  arm  through  his,  com 
pelling  her  to  keep  his  pace,  still  the  girl  looked  back  as 
she  held  behind  her  the  last  of  the  lure.  Ky  was  making 
her  way  better  than  her  new  friend,  for  Hildegarde's 
weakened  ankle  turned  more  than  once,  and  now  she  was 
almost  down.  Cheviot  had  swung  back  and  had  her  on 
her  feet  again. 

"Louis—       But  the  pain  had  turned  her  faint. 

"It  's  horrible  to  hurt  you,  but  there  may  n't  be 
another  boat  this  year/'  he  jerked  out,  starting  on 
again. 

Hildegarde  had  no  real  fear  of  their  being  left. 
Was  n  't  "  the  watchman ' '  with  her  ?  But  Ky !  The  sail 
ors  might  refuse  to  wait  for  a  dog. 

"Here!"  He  shook  off  her  slack  hand  and  grasped 
her  by  the  arm.  ' '  I  must  help  you  more. ' ' 

"Yes,  yes.    Help  me  to  get  her  down  there  in  time. ' ' 

"All  right!"  But  he  was  shouting  the  reassuring 
words  across  the  surf.  "Come  on!"  he  encouraged  the 
sailors.  "Coming  on"  was  easier  said  than  done.  An 
instant  the  boat  had  fallen  back. 

"We  '11  be  there  as  soon  as  you!"  Cheviot's  shout 
dropped  hoarsely:  "We  won't  if  you  can't  do  better 
than  this." 

"You  '11  have  to  tell  father—" 

"If  you  stop  to  talk  we  '11  simply  be  left  behind." 

Ah,  well,  if  he  took  it  like  that,  why  should  she  go  any 
further  with  him?  "You  'd  better  hurry  on  with  the 


"  Hildegarde's  ankle  turned  more  than  once,  and  now  she  was 
almost  down  " 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  519 

dog,"  she  said.    "Tell  father  he  must  manage  somehow 
to  come. ' ' 

' '  Are  you  out  of  your  head ! ' '    He  seemed  to  be  carry 
ing  her  forward  without  volition  of  hers.     She  offered 
no  physical  resistance  but,  "  I  'm  not  coming  with  you  to 
the  ship,"  she  said.    "I  've  got  to  go  back." 
"Go  where,  for  God's  sake?" 
"Back  to  the  hut." 
"Go- what  for?" 

"Because  Jack  Galbraith  is  there."  For  just  an  in 
stant  his  fingers  slackened  hold.  The  shadow  of  a  fear 
she  had  never  seen  in  those  clear  eyes  darkened  the  fine 
candor  of  his  face,  and  then,  with  firmer  grasp,  he  was 
once  more  hurrying  her  on. 

"I  'm  not  going  crazy.  It  's  sober  truth.  Louis, 
Louis,  what  are  we  to  do  ? " 

"Prevent  that  boat  from  leaving  us  behind." 
"Ah,  you  don't  care!    It  's  nothing  to  you!" 
The  hand  on  her  arm  tightened  in  such  a  grip  she 
could  hardly  keep  from  crying  out  with  the  pain  of  it,  but 
faster  than  ever  the  two  were  flying  along  the  stony  beach. 
"Oh  Louis,  help  me !"  she  said  passionately,  and  hold 
ing  back  by  main  force  she  brought  down  the  pace. 
"You  would  n't  want  me  to— oh,  tell  me  what  's  to  be 
done!" 

"I  don't  know."  Suddenly  all  that  energy  of  his 
seemed  spent.  "Perhaps  nothing  can  be  done." 

She  had  never  before  seen  hopelessness  in  his  face.  It 
pierced  through  all  her  preoccupation  and  excitement. 
"Yes,  yes,  something  can  be  done.  You  need  n't  take  it 
as  you  're  doing.  Oh,  Louis,  don't  you  see,  you  might 
go  back." 


520  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

"If"  He  looked  at  her  with  eyes  that  made  her  draw 
a  breath  of  pain.  "It  is  true,"  he  said;  "I  might  go 
back." 

"Will  you?"  she  faltered. 

1 '  To  Galbraith,  you  say !    You  want  me  to  go  back  ? ' ' 

"Do  you  'want'  to  leave  him  here  friendless,  sick.  Oh, 
it  was  well  I  came!  I  must  have  had  an  inkling;  yes, 
yes,  a  presentiment." 

' '  That  's  why  you  came !    Why  you  waited  here  ! ' ' 

The  sailors  might  abandon  their  dangerous  task  and 
leave  those  two  there  on  the  beach,  for  all  it  seemed  to 
matter  to  Louis  Cheviot,  since  he  had  halted  on  the 
words:  "Galbraith  behind  these  days,  too!" 

The  shouting  of  the  sailors  made  him  turn  his  eyes. 
The  boat  out  there,  baffled  again,  was  driven  back  in  a 
third  effort  to  make  the  final  run.  Cheviot  with  his  free 
hand  shaped  a  trumpet,  and  through  it  shouted  across 
the  surf,  "Try  up  here!" 

The  men  in  the  boat  called  out  something  that  was 
drowned  in  the  clamor  of  the  waves,  and  Cheviot  was 
running  Hildegarde  faster  than  ever  down  that  last 
stretch  of  the  stony  beach.  Would  he  never  stop  and  let 
her  get  back  her  voice?  Oh,  this  carrying  a  hot  ball  of 
lead  in  your  breast,  and  having  to  lift  it  every  time  you 
strained  for  breath. 

"Louis,  wait !  Ky,  Ky,  come  on  !"  Why  was  he  hur 
rying  her  more  than  ever?  Did  he  imagine—  Her 
power  to  think  seemed  to  be  leaving  her.  A  wavering 
vision  off  there  in  the  sunshine  of  Louis's  late  guide  hur 
rying  down  from  the  settlement  with  several  other  men, 
two  were  natives.  And  the  boat,  where  was  the  boat? 
Beaten  back  again,  and  that  time  all  but  swamped.  Yes, 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  521 

now  it  was  gone — down  behind  the  white  breakers,  or 
further  down  among  the  rocks?  The  look  on  Louis's 
face— it  gave  her  a  new  measure  of  loneliness.  It  was 
like  the  door  of  one's  own  home  locked  and  barred 
against  one.  But  she  could  n  't  see  well,  for  the  loosened 
hair,  blown  into  her  eyes,  was  blinding  her.  Tears,  too. 
On  and  on  over  the  water-worn  stones  with  that  harsh 
hand  grasping  her.  If  her  feet  slipped  they  were  not 
suffered  to  falter,  if  they  stumbled  they  were  harshly 
steadied.  On  and  on  with  this  constriction  at  the  breast, 
and  at  her  side  this  face  of  granite.  A  moment's  mem 
ory  of  the  arctic  current,  and  the  picture  that  had  stood 
to  Galbraith  for  the  type  of  helpless  human  striving. 
Something  of  the  same  sense  of  futility  visited  her  as  her 
feet  followed  the  stronger  will.  Did  nothing  matter  then, 
except  this  on  and  on  ?  Death  up  yonder  on  the  tundra. 
Death  down  there  in  the  surf.  Pain  wherever  there  was 
life.  Pain  only  to  draw  the  breath.  She  got  hers  in 
great,  clutching  gasps  that  stabbed  her.  Now  they  were 
down  near  the  foam-line.  They  were  running  in  the  wet 
sand.  The  rage  of  the  surf  in  her  ears,  the  taste  of  the 
brine  on  her  lips.  John  Galbraith  found,  and  John  Gal 
braith  dying.  Everything  changing,  Louis  most  of  all. 
The  fabric  of  her  world  dissolving  before  her  dazed  eyes 
to  the  sound  of  sea-born  thunder. 

"You  Ve  got  to  make  a  rush— and  not  mind  a  duck 
ing  ! "  It  was  one  of  the  sailors  shouting.  The  big  fel 
low  in  the  hip-boots  had  leaped  out  of  the  plunging  boat 
into  the  surf.  He  was  hurled  headlong,  recovered  foot 
ing,  and,  streaming  with  sea  water,  buffeted  his  way  out 
of  the  foam,  while  he  roared  angrily,  "Come  on,  if  yer 
comin'.  Cap'n's  orders,  bring  ye  or  leave  ye." 


522  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

' '  The  dog  first, ' '  Hildegarde  cried  out.  ' l  No,  the  lame 
one." 

The  sailor  hesitated,  swore,  and  then,  on  Cheviot's 
word,  obeyed.  His  late  guide  panting,  breathless,  ap 
peared  with  the  other  men  at  his  heels,  all  but  the  Esqui 
maux  with  letters  to  send  out.  Cheviot  thrust  them  in 
his  pocket. 

"Now,  Hildegarde." 

"Not  both  of  us,"  she  said,  meeting  his  eye. 
"Which?"  Each  looked  deep  in  that  swift  instant,  nei 
ther  flinching. 

' '  If  you  are  n  't  coming  of  your  own  accord— ' '  he  said. 

"What  then?" 

He  made  a  sign  to  the  blaspheming  sailor.  The  two 
lifted  her  in  their  arms  and  carried  her  through  the  surf, 
just  as  hours  before  they  had  carried  her  out. 

"Now,  sir,"  said  the  sailor,  "in  with  you."  Cheviot 
stood  with  the  foam  swirling  above  his  long  boot  tops. 
"You  want  me  to  stay  behind?"  he  called. 

"If  I  could  do  it  myself,"  Hildegarde  began. 

Without  a  word  he  turned  his  back  on  her,  strode  out 
of  the  water  and  up  the  stony  beach. 

IF,  upon  his  return  home,  Mr.  Mar  was  surprised  at  the 
warmth  of  his  reception,  he  was  yet  more  perplexed  to 
find  himself  never  once  called  upon  to  state  the  value  of 
his  Polaris  mining  interests. 

When  he  sufficiently  recovered  from  his  astonishment 
at  this  oversight  on  Mrs.  Mar's  part,  he  tried  once  or 
twice  to  introduce  the  subject  of  his  claims  into  the  fam 
ily  circle.  But  his  wife  firmly  changed  the  conversation, 
as  one  who  insists  that  painful  bygones  shall  be  bygones 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  523 

forever.  Mar  smiled  inwardly,  for  Cheviot's  report  had 
been  glowing,  and  for  Cheviot  to  write  like  that— well,  it 
was,  as  the  sage  said,  significant  of  much.  But  Cheviot 
was  still  "in  Alaska,  looking  after  things,"  and  Mar 
kept  his  own  counsel. 

It  was  plain  that  these  last  years  had  left  their  mark 
upon  his  wife.  He  laid  the  change  at  first  to  the  disin 
tegrating  action  of  time  upon  even  that  hard,  bright  sur 
face.  He  never  knew  the  secret  rage  he  caused  by  attrib 
uting  to  the  weakness  of  age  what  was  due  to  a  hard-won 
self-mastery,  a  realized  and  ripened  affection.  Only  little 
by  little  did  he  become  aware  that  the  alteration,  so  far 
from  being  a  sign  of  letting-go,  was  evidence  of  a  fresh 
taking-hold;  a  courageous  determination  not  to  shrink 
from  making  unpleasant  discoveries  about  herself  merely 
because  she  was  of  an  age  when  most  people  cease  to 
make  discoveries  of  any  sort. 

Whatever  pains  her  late-won  knowledge  cost  Mrs.  Mar, 
her  family,  and  especially  her  old  and  broken  husband, 
reaped  some  benefit  of  that  lady's  ability  to  go  on  learn 
ing  at  a  time  of  life  when  the  majority  think  it  rather  no 
ble  if  they  make  so  much  as  an  effort  to  teach. 

It  is  probable  that,  failing  Hildegarde,  Mar  might 
never  have  grasped  the  full  meaning  of  the  enlighten 
ment  that  had  come  to  his  life's  partner  during  these 
three  years  of  his  absence.  Upon  that  first  glimpse  of 
him,  as  he  came  limping  in  at  the  door,  his  wife  had 
looked  at  him  with  a  face  no  one  who  saw  could  forget. 
"It  's  been  hard  for  you,  too,"  she  said. 

"For  me,  too?"  he  echoed,  wondering. 

But  she  had  no  other  word,  either  then  or  after— no 
gift  of  tender  apology,  nor  even  of  explanation.  Her 


524  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

task,  as  she  conceived  it,  was  not  to  talk  about  a  long 
past  that  was  irrevocable,  but  to  "show"  the  possibility 
of  a  brief  future  that  she  felt  to  be  still  within  their 
reach. 

For  Hildegarde  all  life  had  come  to  a  standstill. 
Weeks  must  go  by  before  Bella,  at  her  old  friend's  ur 
gent  summons,  could  get  back  from  abroad. 

Hildegarde 's  soreness  of  heart,  her  hopelessness  of  the 
greater  gladness  for  herself,  left  her  the  freer  to  think  of 
it  as  only  half  an  achievement— this  bringing  her  father 
back  in  the  flesh.  She  must  see  his  spirit  "at  home"  be 
fore  her  task  was  ended.  No  discreet  opportunity  was 
lost  to  set  her  mother  in  an  explanatory  light.  When  the 
neighbors  chorused  admiration  of  the  girl's  pluck  and 
resourcefulness  on  the  great  journey,  oh-ing  and  ah-ing, 
and  "How  on  earth  did  you  manage?"— "It  was  never 
the  least  difficult,"  Hildegarde  would  interrupt. 
"When  I  was  at  a  loss  I  always  thought  how  my  mother 
would  take  hold  of  the  matter,  and  when  I  had  imagined 
her  into  my  perplexity  it  was  n't  a  perplexity  any  longer. 
I  saw  just  what  she  would  do,  and  I  saw  it  was  just 
right." 

Only  once,  with  her  father  alone,  did  she  venture 
openly  to  suggest  a  corrected  judgment  of  the  past. 

They  had  been  talking  of  Mrs.  Locke.  Mar,  who  had 
failed  so  signally  in  getting  a  post  for  himself,  had  suc 
ceeded  in  getting  one  for  his  daughter's  friend. 

"You  have  been  good  about  it!"  Hildegarde  said. 
"I  'm  so  grateful.  So  is  she. ' ' 

"  So  is  the  firm.    She  's  a  success. ' ' 

"It  just  shows!" 

"Shows  what?" 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  525 

' '  That  the  reason  women  are  n  't  more  use  in  the  world 
is  because  they  don 't  have  a  chance. ' ' 

"H'm!"  said  Mr.  Mar. 

"No.    Not  a  real  chance,  father." 

' '  Good  heaven !    They  have  everything. ' ' 

"No.  They  don't  have  education.  I  don't  mean  out 
of  books.  It  's  just  as  Mrs.  Locke  says.  They  stand  as 
little  chance  of  knowing  about  life  as  kings  and  queens 
do.  They  are  still  a  class  apart." 

"Oh,  she  talks  like  that— your  Mrs.  Locke?"  said  Mar, 
with  an  obvious  uneasiness. 

"Not  of  herself.  Of  the  rest  of  us— unless"— she 
smiled— "unless  we  've  been  to  Nome;  or,  like  mother, 
to  Mecca." 

"To  Mecca?" 

With  a  face  more  serious  the  girl  went  on :  "  I  've  only 
just  begun  to  notice  who  among  the  women  I  know  are 
the  most  successful  and  the  most  sensible.  They  're  the 
ones  that  have  had  the  most  experience,  gone  about  most, 
or"— her  voice  sunk— "had  some  great  trouble,  known 
about  life  somehow  by  knocking  up  against  it.  It  looks 
as  if  the  only  way  to  get  judgment  is  by  having  to  judge. 
Men,  of  course— you  're  always  practising.  You  're  in 
things.  You  are  n 't  an  outsider. ' ' 

"Who  is  an  outsider?" 

"Every  woman,  when  she  comes  out  of  her  own  front 
door.  Now" — before  he  could  answer  she  hurried  on — 
"now,  there  's  mother"  (she  spoke  as  if  she  had  only  just 
remembered  her ) .  ' '  A  clever  person  like  mother— why,  if 
she  'd  had  ten  times  as  much  to  do,  she  'd  have  done  it 
ten  times  better.  And  she  would  n't  have  had  time  to 
think  about— a— the  cracks  in  the  china.  Yes,  father, 


526  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

you  may  depend  upon  it,  it  's  the  women  that  have  n't 
got  much  in  them  that  fit  best  into  the  small  places. 
Mother  's  always  been  crowded." 

When  Bella  came  back  from  England  that  September, 
Mar  and  his  daughter  had  been  already  six  weeks  at 
home.  Although  given  full  credit  for  having  so  happily 
reconstituted  the  domestic  circle,  for  Hildegarde  herself 
the  devouring  loneliness  that  had  invaded  existence 
showed  its  first  sign  of  yielding  when  Bella's  childish 
face  appeared  at  the  door.  None  the  less  for  Bella's 
friend  a  shrinking  of  the  heart  as  she  held  close  the 
slight  figure  in  its  smart  French  gown.  What  a  butter 
fly  to  be  broken  on  the  wheel  of  life ! 

"But  Louis!"  Twenty  minutes  after  her  arrival, 
Bella,  as  she  followed  Hildegarde  up-stairs,  put  the  ques 
tion  for  the  second  time.  Why  had  he  stayed  behind  ? 

Hildegarde 's  only  answer  was  to  hold  open  the  door  of 
her  room  and,  when  the  new-comer  had  passed  through, 
to  shut  it  softly  behind  them  both.  Still  in  silence  she 
laid  down  Bella's  hat  and  gloves,  and  then  came  and 
stood  beside  her  friend,  who  sat  watching  her  from  the 
old  nook  of  the  cushioned  window-seat. 

"You  might  have  told  me  something,  even  in  a  cable. 
What  happened  up  there  ? ' '  Bella  said  softly. 

"What  happened?" 

"Yes.    About  Louis." 

"I  came  to  realize  him.  There  's  nothing  like  that 
wonderful  north  light  for  making  you  see  truly. ' ' 

"Well,  what  did  you  find  he  was  like  when  you  saw 
him— like  that,  in  a  north  light?" 

"I  found  that  he  was— the  man  I  wanted  to  go 
through  life  with." 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  527 

"I  Ve  been  hoping  for  that,"  said  Bella  quietly. 

"Ah,  but  I  did  n't  only  find  him  up  there.  I  lost  him, 
too." 

Bella  leaned  forward  and  took  Hildegarde 's  hand. 
Very  gently  she  drew  her  down  on  the  cushioned  seat. 

Hildegarde  had  turned  her  filling  eyes  away,  but  she 
faced  her  friend  for  the  moments  of  that  low  crying, 
' i  Oh,  Bella,  Bella,  when  you  think  what  a  miracle  it  is  to 
find  the  right  one  in  the  maze,  how  is  it  that  we  ever  let 
the  right  one  go?" 

Bella  released  the  hand  she  had  taken  and  turned  her 
head,  looking  out  of  the  window. 

But  Hildegarde 's  thrilling  voice  went  on :  "I  wonder 
we  don 't  watch  at  the  gate  of  the  Beloved  from  dawn  till 
night,  waiting  till  he  comes.  I  wonder  he  does  n  't  lie  all 
night  at  her  door,  for  fear  in  a  dream  she  may  steal 
away. ' ' 

"And  yet,"  said  the  other,  "in  broad  daylight  each 
lets  the  other  go. ' ' 

"Yes,  and  with  an  air  of  being  willing.  Of  being  able 
to  bear  their  going.  And  we  can't  bear  it!"  Her 
dimmed  eyes  fell  on  Bella's  beautiful  face.  "At  least,  I 
can't  bear  it— or— if  I  do,  it  will  be  because  you  help  me, 
Butterfly  Bella.  For  you  Ve  learned  how." 

"Yes,  I  Ve  learned  how." 

Strange,  wonderful  little  Bella.  Hildegarde  stared  at 
the  slight  creature,  half -stoic  and  half -sprite. 

* '  How  was  it  ?    Why  could  n 't  Louis  see  ? " 

"I  tried  his  patience  again  and  again." 

"You  did  n't  wait  till  you  got  him  in  a  north  light  for 
that." 

"—and  he  was  strong  and  kind  and  immovable  in  his 


528  COME  AND  FIND  ME 

goodness,  no  matter  what  I  did  or  said.  And  his  faith 
fulness  to  my  father— there  are  n't  any  words  for  that. 
But  you  remember— Bella,  sit  close— mother  told  you 
about  the  hermit. ' ' 

"The  hermit!" 

"The  strange  man  they  all  thought  had  found  the 
Mother  Lode. ' ' 

Step  by  step,  moment  by  moment,  she  went  through 
those  hours  at  Polaris,  though  there  was  little  need  to 
take  Bella  farther  than  the  threshold  of  the  hut. 

She  held  up  two  shaking  hands,  and,  "I  know!  I 
know!"  she  whispered.  "Before  you  open  the  door,  be 
fore  you  knock— I  know." 

1 '  How  do  you  know  1  ' ' 

"Go  on,"  said  Bella,  with  an  intensity  of  quietness. 
And  like  that  to  the  end— looking  more  than  ever  a 
spirit,  and  like  a  spirit  seeming  to  have  no  human  heart 
for  breaking,  Bella  listened  with  wide,  far-looking  eyes 
that  half  the  time  were  tearless. 

It  was  Hildegarde  who  broke  down  when  she  told  how 
at  the  last,  Ky  and  she  had  left  him.  When  her  choked 
voice  failed:  "Of  course,  I  know  the  end,"  said  Bella, 
and  they  held  each  other  fast,  sitting  there  a  long  time 
with  no  word  spoken. 

At  last  Hildegarde  felt  the  small  hands  loose  their 
hold.  Bella  stood  up.  And  now  she  was  walking  up  and 
down  the  room.  At  last,  as  by  a  chance,  her  eyes  found 
Hildegarde,  and  a  great  gentleness  came  into  the  little 
face.  She  came  back  to  the  window  and  stood  close 
against  her  friend. 

Hildegarde  lifted  her  head.  "You  say  you  know  the 
end,  but  you  don't  quite.  Louis  came  calling  me  to 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  529 

hurry,"  and  she  told  of  those  few  minutes  on  the  beach. 
"I  did  n't  realize  I  was  ruining  my  life.  I  went  on  in 
sisting.  Yes,  Jack  Galbraith  did  n't  die  deserted,  for  I 
sent  him  in  his  last  hour  my  best  chance  of  happiness. 
I  clung  to  the  side  of  the  boat  and  watched  Louis  cross 
the  beach  with  Eeddy  at  his  heels.  Ky  was  crouching  at 
the  stern  with  her  black  muzzle  turned  to  the  shore, 
howling,  howling.  The  men  were  angry,  the  dog  was  in 
their  way.  "She  is  hungry,"  I  said.  She  had  begun  to 
gnaw  the  glove  I  had  dropped  in  the  bottom  of  the  boat. 
Then  it  suddenly  flashed  over  me !  If  there  was  nothing 
in  the  hut  to  feed  a  hungry  dog,  neither  was  there  any 
food  for  a  man. ' ' 

Bella  hid  her  face. 

With  fresh  tears  Hildegarde  went  on,  "And  Louis 
would  n't  know.  It  had  n't  occurred  to  me  at  all  while  I 
was  there.  I  found  myself  sobbing,  and  saying  half  out 
loud,  'Oh,  God,  oh,  God,  is  that  why  Jack  is  dying?'  The 
sailors  were  staring.  I  leaned  over  and  said  to  the  big 
Dane,  'Do  you  want  to  make  some  money,  you  and  these 
others  ?  I  '11  pay  you,  pay  you  well,  if  you  '11  give  me 
just  five  minutes  more  on  shore.'  No,  no.  They  were 
all  of  one  mind.  'I  '11  pay  you  ten  dollars  a  minute,'  I 
said,  and  I  'd  have  gone  on  offering  more  if  they  had  n't 
turned  back  for  that.  It  's  risking  life,  they  said,  and 
they  told  me  how  the  captain—  But  they  thought  I  was 
distracted  at  leaving  Louis,  and  that  all  I  wanted  was  to 
get  him.  They  liked  Louis.  They  turned  back.  Just 
then  the  whistle  screamed  out  from  the  Beluga  very  an 
grily.  But  they  ran  the  boat  in  on  a  great  wave,  and  I 
flung  out  through  the  surf  and  ran  up  on  the  tundra 
calling  Louis.  He  was  standing  at  the  door  of  the  hut 


530  COME  AND  FIND  MB 

with  the  man  who  'd  shown  him  the  way  to  the  mines. 
Louis  turned  round  when  he  heard  my  voice,  and  oh, 
Bella,  the  look  on  his  face !  'So  you  could  n't  leave  it  to 
me  even  to  ~bury  him/  he  said."  She  hid  her  eyes  in 
Bella 's  lap.  '  *  And  that  was  the  end. ' ' 

There  was  a  long,  long  silence.  At  last  a  hand  on 
Hildegarde  's  hair,  and  Bella 's  voice  saying :  ' '  For  you  it 
was  n  't  the  end. ' ' 

The  other  lifted  her  face.  "Yes,  for  me,  too. 
'There  's  nothing  to  be  done,'  Louis  repeated  that.  I 
was  to  go  back,  he  said,  for  my  father's  sake.  And  I  did. 
I  was  quite  dazed.  But  for  me,  too,  it  was  the  end. ' ' 

' '  Where  is  Louis  now  ? ' ' 

' '  I  don 't  know.    I  have  n 't  seen  him  since. ' ' 

"Nor  heard?" 

"I  got  a  letter  to  him,  but—" 

"Was  n't  there  time  for  an  answer?" 

"I  got  an  answer.  But  there  was  nothing  in  the  let 
ter." 

"Nothing?" 

"Nothing,  but  how  they  'd  buried  John  Galbraith. 
Oh,  Bella!"  Hildegarde 's  horror-struck  eyes  besought 
forgiveness. 

But  Bella  spoke  with  a  strange  steadiness.  "Louis 
did  n't  say  any  of  the  things  you  wanted  him  to  say?" 

Hildegarde  shook  her  head.  "We  waited,  father  and 
I.  We  lived  on  board  first  one  and  then  another  steamer. 
And  two  ships  went  away  without  us.  Father  was  so 
good,  so  good.  He  moved  heaven  and  earth  to  get  an 
other  message  to  Polaris  to  say  that  we  were  waiting. 
And  Louis  never  came.  I  have  hurt  him  so  much  he 
can't  bear  even  to  see  me."  They  sat  in  the  silence,  cry 
ing. 


COME  AND  FIND  ME  531 

"Bella." 

"Yes." 

"You  and  I  will  never  let  each  other  go." 

"No, "said  Bella. 

"You  and  I  alone  together  till  the  end  " 

"AndKy." 

"Ky,  of  course,"  Hildegarde  amended.  "Where  is 
she  now  ? ' ' 

"Down  there,  in  the  shade  of  the  redwood.  There, 
don't  you  see?" 

Hildegarde  shook  her  head.  "Not  very  well."  She 
wiped  away  her  tears.  "But  that  's  how  I  kept  seeing 
life  all  the  way  home.  You  and  the  great  discoverer 
and  I." 

Bella  had  stood  up.    ' '  You  're  as  blind  as  Ky ! " 
"Why  do  you  say  that?"  Hildegarde  asked  miserably, 

with  a  sudden  sense  of  desertion.     "What  do  you  see 

then?" 

"Louis  Cheviot  coming  across  the  lawn." 


UNIVERSITY  OF  CALIFORNIA  LIBRARY 
BERKELEY 

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JUL  1 6  1980 

REC.QR.JUN2  5 


OCT  061992 

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